Previously on Survivor South Africa the girls were finally ready to make a strike against Rob and blow the game wide open. Sadly for Laetitia and Steffi, however, he won reward and took Nicole, ending their feud and ensuring she was with him to the end. Things went from bad to worse as Rob took out immunity, though the women were ready to pivot and get rid of Durao instead. Sadly that too, was a lie as at tribal council, Nicole pulled out an idol and played it for him, followed by Rob playing his for Nicole and a shcoked Laetitia playing hers for herself, leaving poor Steffi to be Cirie’d from the game.

The tribe returned to camp after coldly icing Steffi, with Durao shocked and excited to have been saved in the process of humiliating poor Steffi. Laetitia, however, was pissed and shot daggers at Nicole. To her credit, or delusion, she tried to apologise to Laetitia who was not fucking having it at all, calling her out for lying and letting Rob know that hours ago she was still on board with getting him out. Nicole then spoke about them being there because Rob saw the strength in them as women and TBH, I am sick of hearing her talk about it as it is insufferable. I mean, she should be able to see her strength without his validation, but what would I know?

Durao was still feeling grateful the next day while Nicole gloated about how epic tribal council was and now the heroes can now battle it out for victory, seemingly unaware how dislikable it makes her sound. Laetitia finally had had enough, cussing out Nicole to us and pointing out that she needs to shut the hell up because talking about having integrity doesn’t give you it. Before Laetitia could completely destroy her, Nico arrived for the final immunity challenge where the survivors would have to hold ever expanding pieces of rod horizontally between paddles and balance a ball on top. Aka the challenge that proved the death of Malcolm in the Philippines. Poor Laetitia was the first person to drop her ball on the second stage with the other three progressing to the next stage. Which tragically claimed Durao and Nicole in quick succession, handing Rob final immunity and guaranteeing himself the win, essentially.

Back at camp the tribe congratulated Rob on securing his spot in the finals before Nicole happily shared that she and Rob would decide who joins them in the final three. Laetitia however was not having it, approaching Rob to point out that Nicole is a liar and has been gunning for him the entire game. Try as she may, this only seemed to make Rob see her as the more dangerous of the two. She then brought Rob and Nicole together to see whether they could vote out Durao instead before Nicole told her – and I shit you not because this is some next level bullshit – that after what she tried to do with Steffi at the last tribal council she isn’t worthy of lasting any longer. Laetitia then told Nicole that actions speak louder than words, and warned her that the jury is going to laugh in her face if she preaches loyalty. Nicole then caught up with Rob privately, crying over what Laetitia said to her. Sadly for her, however, Rob had grown tired of her tears and lies, and hot damn is Laetitia actually going to destroy Nicole’s game?

At tribal council Rob was feeling grateful to make it to the final tribal council, particularly since Steffi and Laetitia had tried to woo Nicole to fight for women’s rights. I shit you not. Nicole then admitted that in a moment of weakness she agreed to join the women, but ultimately realised that women’s empowerment shouldn’t come at the expense of men – this is a direct quote, FYI – particularly men who elevate strong women. As the jury collectively rolled their eyes at yet another sanctimonious Nicole speech. Laetitia joined the fray and mentioned that Nicole lied directly to Rob’s face about the alliance before pointing out that Nicole has lied to everyone on the jury despite talking about how honest she is. This pissed Nicole off who questioned when it became a game where you need to have a message when you get to the end, unaware that she is the one that spoke like it was. 

Laetitia continued to come for Nicole, calling her out for playing the wounded bird in Rob’s eyes, winning even more fans on the jury. With that the tribe voted, Laetitia tragically held on to her nullifier and found herself becoming our robbed goddess final juror. As she arrived at Ponderosa, I pulled her in for a massive hug and thanked her for trying to save the season. Sadly for her, however, her compelling performance and ability to shit all over Nicole’s chances is why she was shown the door instead. Though, hey, maybe she will win an All Stars season like she deserves. Until then, we toasted her epic run with a fresh glass of Laetitia l’Amarula Cream.

Sweet. Coffee. Liqueur. Need I say more? This gorgeous little South African number is gorgeously rich, so very smooth and TBH, very needed knowing Nicole is a finalist.

Enjoy!

Laetitia l’Amarula Cream
Serves: 1 icon and the heartbroken blogger that wanted an exciting finish.

Ingredients
2 tbsp espresso
360ml whiskey
400g condensed milk
200ml full cream 
1 tsp honey

Method
Combine the espresso, whiskey, condensed milk, full cream and honey in a bowl and mix well. Pour into a bottle and leave in the fridge for 7 days to set, shaking daily.

Then and only then, down.


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