Despite the fact that Pats and I created the punk scene in 70s NYC, a wild and rebellious genre in the time before Giuliani cleaned up the streets – I would say when the world was more dangerous … but let’s be honest, the world is fucked – we’ve always had a calm and almost ethereal nature to our friendship.
Think Cate Blanchett and Julie Anne Smith.
Thank fuck for that because we had some shit we needed to work through and if it was any other friend, we likely would have had a public spat and taken Lohan out of the news cycle.
Pats was hurt that – despite admitting singing with Bono was horrifically wrong – she was always willing to forgive me for making mistakes, I couldn’t give her the same respect.
Obviously my first impulse would normally be to burn my building to the ground and vow to never speak to her again … probably calling for a plague on her house in the process, but that calming force she has over me made me see sense and accept that what she was saying, was the truth.
Plus, I was still walking in the clouds, albeit gingerly, from my catch-up with Bob.
Anyway, we did some poetry slam, worked through the pain I caused by stealing Mapplethorpe, wrote some music and resolved all of our issues – even the disgusting Bono slight – over a tonne of Peppermint Patti Smith.
Like their namesake, these treats are effortless, sweet and oh so cool, while balancing the dark and light to fill you with contentedness.
And let’s be honest, what more can I say? Enjoy!
Peppermint Patti Smith
200g condensed milk
1 tbsp mint extract
4 cups icing sugar, sieved plus extra
100g dark chocolate
Combine the condensed milk and mint extract in a bowl and place in a stand mixer on low to combine.
With the mixer still on, slowly and gently, add the icing sugar – I cannot stress slowly and gently enough, lest you want the kitchen to look like a combined party of an 80s model, Hitler and the KKK – and stir until combine.
Dust a bench with icing sugar and knead the mixture until smooth and pliable … like Gumby, or me when trying to woo back Skarsy.
Line a couple of baking sheets with baking paper, remove golf ball sized chunks from the sugary ball and flatten into a disc. Repeat until the ball is gone and refrigerate until set, aka a couple of hours.
When they are almost done, bring a small pot of water to the boil and break the chocolate into a just larger than the saucepan sized glass bowl. Without the bowl touching the water, place/hold it over the heat and gently melt the chocolate until thick and glossy. Leave to cool for about five minutes.
Once cooled, remove the minty discs from the fridge and brush/rub with the chocolate. Once complete, return to the fridge and leave to set for a couple of hours.
Then devour and let the coolness wash over you. U2 are still the worst, but let the cool, calm mint wash the rage away.