Sandra Dohnuts

Baking, Dessert, Golden Globe Gold, Golden Globe Gold: Goldy Bird, Snack, Sweets

Just like that we’ve arrived at the end of this year’s Golden Globe Gold celebration, Goldy Bird and are ready to see whether my bets will pay literal dividends or whether I will need to assume a new identity and disappear again. But let’s not worry about that because after catching up with the divine Ryan, Katey, Rich, Diane and Gael, we’re wrapping things up with icon, queen and this year’s nominee slash host slash my dear friend, Sandra Oh.

I’ve known Sandy for close to two decades after meeting on the set of The Princess Diaries. I was part of Mandy’s entourage at the time but I quickly bonded with Sandra given she is extremely delightful, charming and I knew she was destined for greatness.

Despite the fact I introduced Sand and her ex-husband, I took her under my wing, introduced her to Alexander Payne and then encouraged her to audition for a little show called Grey’s Anatomy.

Needless to say, she is grateful for the way I shaped her career.

Sandra was super stressed as we caught up, busy perfecting the final Globes script with my boy Andy Samberg and getting set for their moment in the sun. Given two of my friends are co-hosting, it goes without saying I haven’t been this proud since the Tina and Amy years.

Given how busy she is, I didn’t want to waste to much of her time so we quickly sat down to run the final odds of the season. Obviously she downplayed her chances for Best Actress in Drama, predicting it is Julia’s to lose – I know Sandy is winning though – while we both agreed that Matthew Rhys will take Best Actor, Penelope Cruz will take Best Supporting Actress and Pose will snatch Best Drama.

With that, I now hand things over to the globes while Sand and I sit in her dressing room preparing for the final show and smashing some Sandra Dohnuts.

 

 

Pillowy dough covered in sticky, sweet ganache and a healthy layer of sprinkles? They may not be classy, but damn are they perfect.

Enjoy!

 

 

Sandra Dohnuts
Serves: 6.

Ingredients
100g butter
¼ cup raw caster sugar
3 eggs
1 cup milk, plus 2 tbsp for the glaze
½ tsp vanilla extract, plus 2 tsp for the glaze
3 ¼ cups plain flour
4 tsp baking powder
pinch of salt
150g icing sugar
4 tbsp cocoa powder
½ cup sprinkles

Method
Preheat the oven to 160°C.

In a large bowl of an electric mixer, cream the butter and sugar together until light, pale and fluffy. With the mixer still on, add the eggs, one at a time allowing to mix after each addition, and the milk and vanilla, mixing until combined. Still mixing, add in the baking powder and salt until just combined – it may look a bit curdled, but relax.

Remove from the mixture and fold in the flour until just combined, making sure not to overmix.

Transfer batter into a piping bag and pipe into a doughnut pan. If you don’t have a pan you can try and pipe them into circles – they may not look perfect, but they’ll taste it!  Bake for 8-10 minutes, or until golden and fluffy.

Remove the doughnuts from the oven and transfer to a wire rack to cool. Repeat the process until the batter is done.

While they’re all chilling, sift together the sugar and cocoa powder in a medium bowl and slowly stir in the milk and vanilla until a smooth, pourable glaze forms. Pour over the chilled donuts and sprinkle, with the sprinkles.

Leave to set, then devour.

 

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Katey Sagal Bombs

Baking, Bread, Breakfast, Golden Globe Gold, Main, Snack, Street Food

After kicking this year’s Golden Globe celebrations – Goldy Bird – with my dear friend and ex-lover Ryan Gosling, I decided to visit with a more maternal figure in my life as we bounced to the TV side of the Globes. And there is no better maternal figures to ever grace the small screen than the one-two punch of Peg Bundy and Gemma Teller Morrow, which are conveniently played by my dear Katey Sagal.

I first met Kate in 1987 when Married was starting up. I was dating David Faustino and was Christina Applegate’s best friend at the time, but it was the warm way she took me under her wing that kept me on set after the inevitable break-ups. And made us like family.

She was always patient, always kind. She does not envy, boast or is … wait, sorry, I am slipping back into Catholic School. She is the kindest most loving person and I know, and I am so lucky to have had her undying support and guidance in my life.

As soon as I saw her, I fell into her arms and started sobbing. Why I am not sure, but it shows the safety I feel in her presence. We quickly gabbed about what we’ve been up to before dipping our toe into the world of Miniseries and TV movies, as we’ve got someone else lined up to cover Drama (who is likely to snatch victory this year). In any event, we agree Darren Criss will continue his streak winning Best Actor for his portrayal of Andrew Cunanan while Amy Adams will defeat Regina King in their other direct battle for Best Actress. Despite Connie Britton’s hair always being my vote. For Best Miniseries or TV Film, my split our votes with Kate going for Sharp Objects, while I am baking American Crime Story if only because of Queen Judith Light.

With that out of the way and how deeply I love Katey and respect our robust odds related discussions, I got to work whipping up one of Christina Tosi’s opi in her honour. In the form of Katey Sagal Bombs.

 

 

Straight up, I love Milk Bar. It is without a doubt the happiest place on earth (alongside Disneyland and In’N’Out, obvi), and this little baby is one of the reasons why. Soft, pillowy dough wrapped around the salty glory of cream cheese, bacon and shallots exploding in your mouth.

I mean, dis good. Dis real good.

Enjoy!

 

 

Katey Sagal Bombs
Serves: 4-8.

Ingredients
‘Mother Dough’
3½ cups flour
1 tbsp kosher salt
1 ¼ tsp active dry yeast
1 ¾ cups water, at room temperature

Filling and assembly
50g streaky bacon, diced
200g cream cheese
4 shallots, sliced
1 tsp raw caster sugar
dash of smoking liquid
¼ tsp kosher salt
1 tbsp white sesame seeds
2 tsp black sesame seeds
2 tsp poppy seeds
1 tbsp dried onion
½ tsp onion powder
¼ tsp garlic powder
1 egg, beaten

Method
First you need to start with the filling, so fry the bacon in a skillet over medium heat until it’s brown and crunchy. Remove from the heat.

Place the cream cheese in the bowl of a stand mixer and beat with the paddle attachment until soft and fluffy. Add the bacon and its fat, the shallots, sugar, smoking liquid and salt, and beat until well combined.

Scoop into 8 even lumps and place in a lined container. Transfer to the freezer until rock solid.

When the lumps are hard, start working on the dough by combining the flour, salt and yeast in the bowl of a stand mixer. Add the water and stir with the dough hook by hand until just combined before transferring it to the mixer and kneading on low for 10 minutes, or until a smooth, soft ball forms.

Transfer to a large oiled bowl, cover with plastic wrap and leave to prove for an hour.

Preheat the oven to 160C.

To assemble, punch down the dough and split in two. Freeze one half in a container, and when you want to use it defrost and then prove for an hour. Split the other dough into 8 equal pieces, and stretch each to form a 10cm wide disc. Place a frozen piece of cream cheese in the centre of each, seal and roll into a smooth ball. Place on a lined baking sheet and repeat the process until done.

Combine the sesame seeds, poppy seeds, dried onion, onion powder and garlic powder in a bowl, and whisk the egg with a tablespoon of water.

Brush each bomb with egg wash and coat with the seed mix. Transfer to the oven and bake for 20 minutes, or until golden brown and exploding with goodness.

Devour immediately. Ish.

 

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Rolling out the red carpet. Again!

Golden Globe Gold, Golden Globe Gold: Goldy Bird, Guess Who's Coming to Dinner

Ok, so do you remember that awkward time I disappeared for three months and vowed to catch-up on all the dates I missed documenting during that time and never let it happen again? Well … it happened again.

Abbi Jacobson GIF by Broad City - Find & Share on GIPHY

Once again I have a really valid excuse – rehab, bereavements, laziness, depression, jail, anger management, intensive inpatient therapy after watching JVN’s break-up play-out and becoming a first-time (puppy) father – but that isn’t what matters.

What matters is that I’ve returned just in the knick of time to roll out the red carpet and celebrate the booziest award show of the season. Yep – it’s time for our annual Golden Globe Gold celebration!!

Who will be needed to clear some space on their mantle and/or bathroom cabinet for some new trophies? Well you’re just going to have to wait and find out. From me. Over the next few days. As I obvi have the deets.

In any event, strap in as like Shangie I am back, back, back again and Goldy Bird is ready to roll.

Image source: HFPA.

 

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Kelly LeBrockoli Salad

Salad, Side, Snack

I’m not going to waste your time listing all the reasons why Kelly LeBrock is so dear to me, it should go without saying. The woman is a saint; she is kind, funny, so sweet and always open to my hairbrained schemes to return her to greatness.

Thankfully with Kath’s BIL and SIL taking all the attention in Sydney/Dubbo – don’t mention it to The Ferg, who I really must catch up with one day soon – she had a low key arrival in Brisbane, which TBH was so nice for a change. I mean, it truly is exhausting being hounded by the paparazzi all day every day like Kell and I are used to.

Given how busy I’ve been lately – aren’t I always? – I haven’t seen as much of Kelly as I would like, and as such, I feel like you haven’t seen as much of Kell as you deserve. For that, I am sorry as I know a world without Kelly gracing the big screen and winning Oscars is not a world that I want to live in.

I apologised to Kelly for letting her down and she laughed about how happy she was and how I shouldn’t let the guilt eat at me. But it had, so I verbally-spammed her with so many different ways that we could bring her back to the A-list, including a stint on The Good Place as Janet’s mother – which links with Weird Science, obvi – competing on Survivor or joining a Housewives franchise and/or co-starring with Meryl, since her movies instantly are fast-tracked to Oscar Gold.

It was a lot to take in, so thankfully I had a big bowl of Kelly LeBrockoli Salad for her to eat while digesting my plans.

 

 

Crunchy and creamy, fresh and tart, this salad in the perfect thing to bring a bit of life to a boring mid-week meal over summer.

Enjoy!

 

 

Kelly LeBrockoli Salad
Serves: 4-6.

Ingredients
2 broccoli heads, cut into small florets
1 lemon, juiced
4 slices pancetta, diced and fried|
4 shallots, sliced
½ cup pecans, roughly chopped and toasted
½ cup craisins
⅓ cup parmesan, grated
½ cup Shayonnaise Swain
½ cup buttermilk
1 tsp muscovado sugar
salt and pepper, to taste

Method
Rinse the broccoli florets and place in a bowl of cold water with the juice of the lemon and leave to sit for fifteen minutes. Drain and shake dry, though don’t be too pedantic about it.

Toss everything together in a bowl until well combined slash coated. Devour.

 

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Weird Science

Guess Who's Coming to Dinner

Halloween is fast approaching and as such, I’ve been burning through my favourite spooky movies and TBH there is nothing spookier than Weird Science.

I mean, my boy RDJ is only credited as Robert Downey. That is scarier than the world we’re currently living in.

Anyway, I was on set during filming – trying to get him to incorporate the Jr into his credit – and quickly became friends with the divine Kelly LeBrock. Seeing her star turn reminded me that, I haven’t been able to see her much lately given I’ve been so busy. As such, I picked up the call and begged her to drop by.

What do I make that shows how much I love her, whilst encouraging her to make a comeback?

Image source: Screencap from The Woman in Red.

 

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Laceberry Sherbet

Dessert, Snack, Sweets, That Is So Fetch Week

Today marks the end of our first publicised Mean Girls day celebration, That’s So Fetch Week. And while that is probably going to leave you with a feeling of crushing emptiness, be glad that you got to experience the joys of celebrating with Mands, Dan Fran, Jono, Lizzy, Rachel and now Lacey.

Well, by association at least.

I’ve known Lacey for over two decades after meeting through Susan and Kelly on the set of All My Children. As with Mands and Lizzy, I was blown away by her talent and vowed to make her a star.

That led to Party of Five and The Wild Thornberrys, which would have been enough of a success without throwing in the role of a lifetime in Gretchen Weiners. Heiress of toaster strudels and key player in making fetch happen.

Given her current status as the queen of Lifetime Christmas movies, I am super proud of Lacey and can’t even be mad that we don’t see each other as often as we like. As soon as she walked off the plane we ran into each other’s arms, sped to my home and caught up on this year’s crop of Lifetime films over a big bowl of Laceberry Sherbet.

 

 

While it appears to be a bit too healthy for my liking, I assure you that this sherbert is hella delicious. Not the powdered type like Michelle Sherbert, this frozen fruit delight packs a strong raspberry flavour and fills you with boundless joy. Which is not an overstatement.

Enjoy!

 

 

Laceberry Sherbet
Serves: 6-8.

Ingredients
500g raspberries, thawed
1 ½ cups milk
⅔ cup raw caster sugar
1 lemon, juiced

Method
Blitz everything in a food processor until smooth.

Strain through a sieve to get rids of any leftover solids or seeds.

Transfer to an ice cream maker and churn for twenty minutes or until the consistency of soft serve. Transfer to a container and freeze overnight, before devouring.

 

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Amanda Seyfried Brie

Party Food, Side, Snack, That Is So Fetch Week

I had had a dream that Lindsay Lohan would be able to drop by as a surprise first That Is So Fetch Week, Mean Girls Day celebration but then she started attacking Syrian woman in Moscow – on transit here, no less – and I thought mamma mia, I can’t have her here right now so quickly booked a private jet for Amanda Seyfried and brought her visit up a day.

Mand and I first met through the divine Susan Lucci. Suze was completely in awe of her talent, gave me a call and said, “Ben my dear. I’ve found another ingenue that you just have to meet and shape her career so that she can become a star.”

Obviously I take Susan’s opinion very seriously, so I jumped on the very next plane to the All My Children set to see for myself.

Immediately, I was taken by her talent and I grabbed my rolodex of hate because I hate the phone, not my friends obvi. Oh and yeah, I coined the term, but whatevs – to see if there was anything my friends were doing that would be suitable.

Tina doll, aren’t you writing that movie about bullying?” I naively said, implying that Mean Girls would just be a story of my life, rather than an iconic film.

“I’ve met this girl and I feel she could add some depth to the bimbo girl I told you about from school.”

With that, Mands snatched the role of Karen and we’ve been the best of friends ever since. To the point where I don’t even mind that she has co-starred with Meryl twice while I am yet to make it into one of her movies.

Given how busy she has been with Mamma Mia 2 and raising her young girl, we haven’t seen as much of each other as we would like. But thankfully our friendship is one that you can slip straight back into like no time has passed at all. Though how could things be awkward when you’ve got a plate of Amanda Seyfried Brie sitting in front of you.

 

 

Hot and gooey on the inside, golden and crisp on the outside, these fried portions of cheese prove that sometimes, somehow, you can improve on perfection. So like hang in there, you know? Maybe I should be a motivational speaker too …

Enjoy!

 

 

Amanda Seyfried Brie
Serves: 4

Ingredients
250g brie
1 egg, whisked
1 tbsp buttermilk
2 cups breadcrumbs
flour, salt and pepper, to taste
2-4 cups vegetable oil, for fryin’

Method
Cut the brie into wedges. Whisk the egg and buttermilk together in a small bowl, place the breadcrumbs in a second and a heap of flour in the third with a good whack of salt and pepper.

Coat the brie in flour, dip it in the egg and coat in the breadcrumbs. Place on a lined plate and leave to set for fifteen minutes or so … before re-dipping in the egg and breadcrumbs. Transfer to the fridge to set for half an hour.

When you’re ready to go, heat the oil in a pot over medium heat and when nice and hot, cook a few pieces at a time for a minute or so, flipping once, or until golden brown.

Devour immediately with Chillijamin McKenzie, being careful of the molten cheese.

 

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Chocolate Crackelly Ripa

Dessert, Snack

Gaaaaaah, it was such a joy to be able to have my celebrity Fame Hungry superfan and dear friend Kelly Ripa over. I mean, the look of joy on her face from the moment she stepped off the plane to when she sat down for her requisite – and now signature – food-smeared face photo is something that will stay with me for all of time.

Knowing that I was making such a dear friend so happy was but icing on the cake of a wonderful date.

As you know, I met through Kell when visiting Susan Lucci on the set of All My Children and we instantly hit it off with our joie de vivre and wicked senses of humour. And despite her sweeping Mark off his feet at the time I was desperate to woo the zaddy for myself, we have always remained the best of friends.

And as an aside, she is beautiful and perfect and she and Mark make the best couple, so screw you jealous trolls!

Anyway – I was casually dating Regis Philbin in the early ‘00s when Kathie Lee Gifford quit Live! and reminded him about their chemistry during her previous appearances. The rest, as they say, is history. Oh, and you’re welcome America.

But back to the date, while she didn’t give any any spoilers from the upcoming season of Riverdale or think my All My Children reboot would work, we still had a lovely time. Though how could you not when you’re surrounded by mounds of Chocolate Crackelly Ripa.

 

 

Given these bake-sale staples are so well known that the recipe is pretty much open source at this point, credit where credit is due so thank you Kellogg’s! Crunchy, sweet and oh so moreish, there is nothing I’d rather make to honour my girl Kell!

Enjoy!

 

 

Chocolate Crackelly Ripa
Serves: 8-12.

Ingredients
4 cups rice bubbles
1 cup icing sugar
1 cup desiccated coconut
250g copha, melted
¼ cup cocoa

Method
Chuck everything in a large bowl and stir to combine.

Portion in to patty cases.

Set in the fridge for a couple of hours.

Devour.

 

As you can probably tell, we are very social but the fun isn’t only limited to celebrities! You can follow us on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest and Tumblr.

Pizza is after, but what will be the main event

Guess Who's Coming to Dinner

I don’t really know where to start when talking about how dear Kelly Ripa is to me.

And not just because she is one of the most powerful people in the media, is a total sweetheart and one half of the adorable Ripa-Consuelos’. She is also a laugh riot and she brings me unending joy.

Though when you’ve been friends for as long as we have – I met her through Susan Lucci on the set of All My Children – that is to be expected. Particularly since we’ve rarely fought.

What do I make that is sweet enough for America’s sweetheart?

Image source: Broad City / Comedy Central.

 

As you can probably tell, we are very social but the fun isn’t only limited to celebrities! You can follow us on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest and Tumblr.

Lena Wafers

Baking, Dessert, Emmy Gold, Emmy Gold: The Gold Wing, Sweets

It is the second last day of this year’s Emmy Gold celebration The Gold Wing, can you believe? And something something segue Gaz, Marg, Ava, Rami and Rhea something, I am thrilled to catch-up with my dear friend and semi-freshly minted Emmy winner Lena Waithe.

Given she won her Emmy with my (problematic) friend Aziz for the beautiful Thanksgiving episode of Master of None, it should come as no surprise that he is the reason we became friends.

I was visiting the set during season 1 and Lena and I got to talking about our coming out experiences, and Aziz suggested that they write it into the second season. So you’re welcome, because that episode was perfection and he and Lena truly deserved that Emmy and I can’t even begrudge them for not including me in the writing process.

Since her victory, Len’s career has absolutely exploded and while it means we don’t get to see each other as often as we’d like, I’m so proud of her. And it makes our fleeting dates even more special. As a fellow writer, I knew that she would be best placed to go through the writing categories with me. Obviously she agreed that The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel’s auteur Amy Sherman-Palladino would snag it for Comedy. Continuing our agreeance, we both backed Phoebe Waller-Bridge for Killing Eve, Steve Martin and Martin Short for their Netflix special and William Bridges and Charlie Brooker will snag it for USS Callister.

With the formalities out of the way, we toasted her success and got to work demolishing a big batch of Lena Wafers.

 

 

Not your childhood’s technicolour crosshatched biscuits, these wafers may not look as perfect but damn they are delicious. Light, sweet and delightfully crisp, they are the only thing worthy of honouring my girl Lena.

Enjoy!

 

 

Lena Wafers
Serves: 6.

Ingredients
115g unsalted butter, at room temperature
100g raw caster sugar
1 egg, whisked
2 tbsp vanilla extract
1 tbsp milk
200g flour
1 tsp baking powder
pinch of kosher salt

Method
Preheat the oven to 180C.

Cream the butter and sugar in a stand mixer for a couple of minutes, or until it is light and fluffy. Still going, add the egg, vanilla and milk and continue beating until just combined.

Combine the flour, baking soda and salt in another bowl before folding through the wet ingredients. Cover and transfer to the fridge for half an hour.

When you’re ready to bake, place teaspoon sized bowls on lined baking sheets, leaving plenty of space for spread. Flatten each ball to form a thin disc and transfer to the oven to bake for fifteen minutes, or until golden.

Remove from the oven and allow to cool on the sheets for a couple of minutes before transferring to a wire rack to cool completely.

Once set, devour.

 

As you can probably tell, we are very social but the fun isn’t only limited to celebrities! You can follow us on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest and Tumblr.