Black Pepper

Pumpkin Spice Bundt

Baking, Cake, Dessert, RuPaul's Drag Race, RuPaul's Drag Race 15, Sweets, TV, TV Recap

Previously on RuPaul’s Drag Race instead of delivering a maxi challenge, Ru gave the dolls a reprieve in the form of a lip sync lalaparuza. Which obviously is only a reprieve for the dolls that win their first round. Everyone else, however, had a fight. Despite some of the queens selecting opponents they felt would be the easiest to beat, sweet Anetra focused on battles. Though after watching her lip sync with Sasha in the first round – which should have been a double shantay – who can blame her confidence. Ultimately it came down to three girls where it came down to Anetra to choose one sister to save, sending sweet Spice to safety and fellow lip sync assassin Jax out of the competition.

The next day the dolls were thrilled to have survived the lip sync lalaparuza, with Marcia particularly happy to be safe on the first round. And to not have to see Jax lip sync a sixth time. Anetra meanwhile was thrilled to have faced off against the Simone Biles of drag and come out on top. While Spice wanted to clarify what she said about entering her top era last week, explaining that she actually meant this week while Mistress joked she was thinking about entering her congeniality era.

Before Malaysia could malfunction at that suggestion, Ru dropped by to challenge the dolls to a little mini challenge where they would have to get into quick drag and photobomb some iconic moments from throughout the series to celebrate the 200th episode. Salina slayed Laganja’s entry, Anetra bombed into Willow Pill’s bubble bath, Malaysia joined Vanjie’s exit, Spice hung with Gaga, Luxx grunted through knocking off Ornacia and Vivacious in their opening shoot, Mistress caught Morgan’s ping pong balls, Marcia creeped on Jinkx’s crowning, Sasha creeped on Ru at the Despys and Loosey hung onto Serena in the tank photoshoot mini challenge. Obviously though it was Anetra that took out the win, given it was iconic and hilarious.

Given the episodes are still only an hour we couldn’t dwell on things, so Ru announced that for this week’s maxi challenge they’d be throwing a 15th anniversary ball. And since that is traditionally marked by crystal, welcome to the Crystal ball! First category the dolls would have to update Ru’s iconic opening racing suit for Start Your Engines. Next up, the dolls would pull inspiration from their favourite balls of yore in the My Favourite Ball runway and close out the show in the Crystalised Eleganza look which they make from scratch. Emphasis on scratch, given it will be fully crystalised. Oh and Loosey is confident, given she makes all her own costumes, so she wants her sisters to know she is the one to beat despite Sasha being right there.

And frequently thinking she should be ranked higher than the judges place her.

After Ru departed, the dolls went nuts grabbing supplies, literally breaking glassware in the process. Mother Sasha was confident in her ability to know fashion and herself, rather than being worried about her lack of sewing skills, while Anetra planned to crystalise Kennedy’s dead chicken. Ru returned with Carson to kiki with the girls, with Spice getting read for giving too much of the same thing and asked to mix it up a little. Mistress meanwhile was sassy as she showed off her big gown moment and while other dolls were going that route too, hers would stand out for being nice. Salina was giving too much and was reminded to edit and sell it on the runway, rather than getting lost in her head. She then opened up about how difficult she has found the emotions of the competition.

Ru and Carson disappeared leading to the girls reading Loosey for being heartbroken over losing the acting challenge. And while Mistress was trying to have a bit of fun, Loosey worried she was trying to get in her head.

Elimination Day arrived with the dolls talking about their siblings, with Salina opening about her queer brother before Anetra spoke about not having talked to her mum after she kicked her out for allegedly making everyone in her uncomfortable for being herself. And ugh, her mum is a dumb bitch and I hate her for doing that to Anetra and making her lose her siblings that she so dearly loves. The positive though is that she reconnected with her birth father who has become her biggest supporter and even bought her her first sewing machine. Talk turned to iconic moments of the past, with the dolls throwing out Shangela and Mimi’s fight, anything Alyssa has ever done, Bianca’s Judge Judy, opulence and Ongina coming out as HIV positive. While Spice was grateful Rebecca Glasscock wore jeans on entry, so she and Sugar could trot in rocking mini skirts.

Ru, Michelle and Carson were joined by Emmy winner Julia Garner on the panel to judge their 200th episode ball. Well, after Ru debuted her new song Cake and Candy. And while she gave us nothing – obviously – the sexy dancing bakers flooded my basement as they gave everything. Kicking off the Start Your Engines category, Mistress gave a classic racer suit full of all the big girls catchphrases. Spice meanwhile turned it into a mini skirt and avoided strutting, while Luxx made things edgy, Marcia slayed in a pastel mod vibe, Salina was street and sexy, Malaysia was glam and gorgeous in pink while Loosey slayed as Barbie and Princess Peach’s lovechild while Sasha turned it into a glamorous gown, while Anetra was fluro and represented her heritage in all the right easy.

Mistress kicked off the My Favourite Ball runway celebrating the ball ball like a sexy club kid beachball, Marcia gave canvas milkmaid in honour of the bag ball, Malaysia was beautiful in a hair gown for the hair ball while Spice gave little furballs for the ball ball. Salina gave palm tree cash for the money ball, Loosey looked like a hippy made out of doggy bags for the bag ball, Luxx was architectural in a hair ball number while Sasha celebrated weed in the sexiest way for the bag ball while Anetra was sickening and sweet for the Sugar Ball.

Closing out the show Mistress’ gown truly was perfection, not like something she made in under 24 hours. Spice looked like she just extended her usual look, Marcia gave a slutty Marie Antoinette, Malaysia too gave a perfect gown, Salina looked beautiful in her gown – despite it not fitting great – while Loosey mocked herself in a gorgeous runner-up evening wear gown. Luxx gave ice fairy and oh god, how did she make that in 24 hours?! Sasha too was stunning, giving a golden coral goddess while Anetra slayed in a gown complete with beaded exposed spine.

Marcia Cubed, Malaysia and Luxx were sent to safety before the judges praised Salina’s first two looks and how she sold them, though read her final gown for just not having the fit down. Spice was praised for her first look, read for giving furball before Michelle read her for filth for the final outfit, though loved how hard she tried not to trot. Mistress received wall to wall praise for all three of her looks, before Loosey was read for her middle look. Sasha then received all of the praise for thinking outside the box on all of her looks, and for looking stunning while doing it. She opened up about House Colby and how it saved her life and ugh, I love her so damn much. While the judges lived for two out of three of Anetra’s look, particularly her final look which was stunning. Though Michelle cautioned her to try not give so much resting bitch face on the runway.

Backstage the dolls – well Marcia and Luxx, anyway – weren’t loving the fact they were only safe which honestly is kind of fair, given the looks they both pulled together in a day. Malaysia was happy with her collection, though kinda was in her feelings about just wanting to have that star moment, given she is still without a win. Marcia felt she deserved the win while Luxx was enraged that her creative look didn’t get the props it was due, as Malaysia tried to suggest it could have just been that she just didn’t give the judges eleganza. Which was sweet, but obviously meant nothing to Luxx. Just like Art.

The tops and bottoms joined them with the girls not shocked to hear Sasha was beloved for giving vastly different looks. Salina shared how disappointed she was to be in the bottom, despite the judges not really hating anything, just the details. Spice just laughed about how the judges found her funny for not trotting and charming the shit out of them. Oh, but she knew she was in the bottom. Loosey shared she was hit and miss with the judges and then when Malaysia pointed out she had no idea what her middle look was about, Loosey cracked it and the duo started fighting. With Malaysia hilariously just finishing things by telling her the look sucked. Basically. Anetra’s final look was beloved though Michelle hated the colour of her first look, with Spice asking them to consider how green feels about Michelle, since she always comes for it.

Talk turned to Spice potentially going home, with everyone talking about how much she has grown and they love her. And I LOVE it. Oh and then Julia Garner dropped by and spat Anna Delvey lines, so I LIVE for that.

Ultimately Sasha took out her second victory of the season, as Anetra and Mistress joined her in the top before Loosey narrowly avoided the bottom, leaving Salina and Spice to battle it out. And as soon as Lil Nas X’s That’s What I Want kicked off, it was clear Salina was surviving, but honestly, I could watch Spice read the phonebook because she is just so silly and joyous and ugh, I love what I love. Though yeah, Salina served a moment, hitting every lyric, finding the perfect balance between comedy and emotion and well, it was only fair she lived to see another day as Spice sadly sashayed away. Via extensive trotting, as Ru and Michelle finally embraced it and cackled along with her.

As she entered the Werk Room, I pulled Spice in for a massive hug and thanked her for being such a glorious ball of joy throughout the season. While the judges never seemed to get her (or Sugar’s) vibe, the fact that her sisters quickly went from hate to love proves that the duo are legit. And absolute delights, so I’m glad that translated to the audience. Given she and Sugar are already uber social media famous – like me, don’t ya know! – it isn’t like she needed much of a pep talk, so instead I toasted her run with a piping hot Pumpkin Spice Bundt.

This spicy number is the perfect addition to any occasion, despite the fact I used a haunted house bundt tin. The earthy pumpkin pairs perfectly with the combination of spices, leaving a moist, cake that melts in your mouth and fills you with glee.

Enjoy!

Pumpkin Spice Bundt
Serves: 8.

Ingredients
2 cups muscovado sugar
115g unsalted butter, softened
½ cup extra-virgin olive oil
2 eggs, at room temperature
1 ½ cups pumpkin purée
½ cup sour cream
3 cups flour
2 tsp baking powder
1 tsp baking soda
1 ¼ tsp kosher salt
1 tbsp ground cinnamon
1 tsp ground cardamom
¼ tsp ground allspice
¼ tsp nutmeg
¼ tsp ground black pepper

Method
Preheat the oven to 170C, and butter and flour a 12 cup bundt pan.

In the bowl of a stand mixer, beat the muscovado sugar, butter and olive oil on medium speed until light and fluffy. Add an egg, allowing the batter to come back together before adding the second. Pour in the pumpkin purée and sour cream, and mix until combined.

Whisk the flour, baking powder, baking soda, salt, cinnamon, cardamom, allspice, nutmeg and pepper in a large bowl. Remove the other bowl from the stand mixer and fold the dry ingredients through until just combined. Pour the batter into the bundt tin, tapping on the bench to remove any bubbles. Pop the tin on a baking sheet if it isn’t stable (the haunted house is far from structurally sound) and transfer to the oven to bake for an hour, or until an inserted skewer comes out clean.

Remove from the oven and allow to cool in the pan for 20 minutes before turning out onto a wire rack to cool completely.

Once chill you can either make a little glaze – maple is a particularly good choice – or simply dust with icing sugar before devouring. Either way, you’ll love it.


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David Shakarakris Fries

Australian Survivor, Australian Survivor: Heroes V Villains, Side, Snack, Street Food, Tapas, TV, TV Recap, Vegetarian

Previously on Australian Survivor the Spice Girls were reunited and living it up on the Heroes after Liz accepted the offer to mutiny. She quickly told George that at the tribal council she jumped ship, the Villains had actually wanted to blindside Hayley, unaware that George felt like his best shot at making it to the end was working with her again. At the next challenge, he immediately spilled the beans to Hayley that she was in trouble and that it was specifically Nina that was after her. After the Heroes lost immunity, Flick and Matt were dead men walking with the Spice Girls split on who would be best for their game come merge. George wanted to work with Matt while Shiz thought Flick would be the most helpful. Which led to fireworks as Liz threatened to play her idol to save Flick at tribal council. Ultimately though, they chose peace, agreeing to vote out Stevie instead as a compromise. Breaking the hearts of the nation.

The next day George gave us the first nude scene of the season, which was way more erotic than I expected. With that out of the way, he returned to camp as everyone reflected on the trauma of tribal council and how bad they felt for Stevie. Flick meanwhile was grateful to Shonee for saving her, whispering how come the merge, they have a lot of similar targets and as such, will easily work together moving forward. Gerry meanwhile was absolutely fuming, knowing how dangerous Flick actually is to their alliance. He caught up with George and Matt, with the trio vowing to work together all the way to the end and hoping to figure out a way to get rid of Flick ASAP without upsetting the girls. Oh and unbeknownst to George, he is totally third in this little alliance.

The tribes joined Jonathan and a massive feast in the middle of the jungle, with everyone giddy to clearly have all made it to the merge. Hugging it out before JLP even told them to drop their buffs. Shaun in particular was thrilled to see Flick and Matt still alive in the game, with Gerry and George clearly gritting their teeth about the former. Hayley got emotional talking about how shocked she is to make it this far, while Simon was glad to finally become datable as a juror on his second shot.

Everyone then took their places at the table and devoured everything in sight, before David whispered to Hayley and Shaun about how much of an advantage the OG Heroes have. Though George reminded us that he shines when in trouble and as such, got to work schmoozing with everyone. Hayley admitted was shocked that both she and George made it to merge as Flick and Liz reunited with their former OG Hero allies. And promptly locked in an alliance to take control, as Hayley watched on and asked George whether she should be concerned. And while they weren’t coming for her yet – Simon says, hey! – it spurred George into action, catching up with Liz to reiterate that they are screwed.

The tribe ventured back to the former Heroes camp where Hayley suggested they come up with the new merge tribe name, with George’s crew suggesting Fa’Amolemole while Nina instead wanted Vigilantes. And while she lost out on a vote, she didn’t really care given she and the OG Heroes have the upper hand on the votes that count. As the Spice Girls and Hayley went for a swim, Flick caught up with Shaun to let him know that she had to pledge allegiance to George, Shonee and Liz at the previous tribal council and as such, one of them needs to budge on this first vote. Sadly for Flick though, he had no interest in it being him and as such, told her they will be staying Heroes strong, though trading Gerry out for Simon. And well, given she would be closer to the top of that group, she was happy to go back on her word. 

That night the alliance got together to plot about the upcoming tribal council, unaware that the Spice Girls were sitting back at camp watching them. And Flick girl, you’re in danger, because Shiz will not take it kindly if you’re really flipping on them so soon.

The next day Shiz and Flick went for an early morning walk down by the shore with Flick pretending that Simon is still the Heroes target, but she suggested she told them they need to split the vote. And then pretended it wouldn’t be on one of the Spice Girls. When it totally would. After Flick disappeared, Shonee told Liz that it was all a lie and Flick is out to get them, so pulled George aside to fill him in and tell him he was right. While he didn’t do a told-you-so dance, he got to work planning which two people would be easiest to lock in. And while George didn’t love it – and Liz sure as hell didn’t – he knew Simon was the easiest target given nobody wants to work with him, so if he offers something, surely it is a good thing. 

With that, the Spice Girls and Matt pulled Simon and Hayley aside to float the idea of working together. With George promptly throwing Flick under the bus, letting Simon know that voting him out was what she told them was the priority. Hayley was all in given she knew it was better to be amongst other threats, while Simon was awkward about being the one that everyone talks about being the target. Knowing he needed to work him just a little more, George pulled Simon aside and assured him that them working together would be so unexpected that it just may work for both of them. And once they take control, they can ride it to the end and deal with their feud once their mutual enemies are gone. Essentially.

The tribe reunited with Jonathan for the first individual immunity challenge of the season where they would have to hold their breath under grates in the ocean as the tide rises until only one was left. Or in the case of Survivor 43, as the tide rose and then fell, leaving Jeffrey to hand out immunity to both Owen and Karla. So congratulations Flick or Matt, I guess, given their professions. Everyone was still holding strong at 30 minutes before a surge took out George, Sam and Shonee in a matter of minutes. The next surge cost Liz her spot, followed by a heartbroken Shaun and Simon. Gerry was next to drop, as Shonee and George started to speculate on the sidelines, with Shonee suggesting they propose everyone unites to get rid of Hayley while George suggested Shonee is actually the more likely target for the Heroes. Back to the challenge, Flick was next out, followed by Hayley and David leaving Matt and Nina to face off before Nina tapped out, handing Matt the first individual immunity of the season. As predicted, I may note.

Back at camp everyone congratulated Matt on a hard fought victory, while Sam quickly suggested one of Shiz would be the best target. So yeah, I’m back to hating Sam. Someone I am loving though is Matt, who was thrilled to be trusted by most of the tribe and as such, ready to play both sides, though assured us (or me) that he intended to side with George to take control. Sam, Shaun, David, Flick and Nina caught up by the well with Flick quickly locking in Shonee as the target while David wanted them to split the vote on Liz to also flush her idol. Hayley and Matt joined the group, quietly nodding as they agreed to split between Shiz. Like the OG Villains, they knew they had to get Simon on board to pull it off, so Shaun pulled him aside to let him know the plan. Selling it as his last shot to prove loyalty, which is a mood.

George and Shonee meanwhile were busy figuring out the best alpha to target, with George wanting to get rid of Sam given all he cares about his loyalty and is kind of holding everyone together. Specifically Simon and Matt, who are most likely to flip back to the alphas. And you know Gerry was keen on that one, given Sam was the one that pushed to send him to the Villains originally. And as was Hayley, given he was coming for her with Nina. Poor Simon however was suffering some Villains related trauma and decided to catch up with Hayley to see what she was thinking and while she tried to gently nudge him in the direction of being smart and working with the OG Villains, he admitted that he is still unsure which way to go.

Simon then wisely approached the Spice Girls to find out what the plan was once Sam was gone, with Shonee and George telling him that he can dictate who goes next should they align. Liz and David meanwhile caught up by the well with Liz pretending the Villains were still out to get Simon, while Dave warned her that she is a target and as such, she should play her idol. She was obviously spooked, so went back to the Spice Girls with her spiralling as George and Shonee tried to keep her calm. The latter, however, was also worried about Simon not being with them and instead of fracturing again, George got to work finding another number to guarantee they have eight people to work with.

Being a bold, messy icon, George pulled Shaun aside and straight up suggested he needs to jump early rather than too late, telling him to join with the Villains to get rid of Sam, given he feels like he is running the show. Shaun ran straight to Sam to fill him in and as he scowled into the jungle about being the target, George went back to spill the beans to Shiz who were irate that he gave the plan to their opponents. As such, the girls flipped the vote to Dave to navigate around a potential idol and while the trio were feeling good, it started to spook Matt that they were all over the shop until Gerry tried to calm things down. While Simon continued to question whether he can trust George enough to keep them both around until the end.

And yes, the answer is yes, given the meat heads are more likely to beat you in challenges. And I prefer the Spice Girls.

At tribal council Hayley spoke about how difficult the first post-merge tribal council is, given everyone has built different relationships, across multiple tribes and now has competing agendas. Matt meanwhile was thrilled to be immune and having the power to make a choice that will secure his future in the game without the fear of it burning him. Yet. George mentioned this tribal council is a turning point in the game, with players setting up their shot at the end with a single decision. Oh and he is super confident, which made David scoff. Liz opened up about clearly being on the bottom of the tribe with Shonee agreeing that she feels like she is in danger, specifically concerned about having to rely on new people for her own survival. David spoke about being hopeful he has built enough relationships to come out on top, as Shonee and George started to whisper about whether Liz needs to play her idol.

George cut everyone off, throwing out Survivor is about deals, rather than relationships and if everyone holds firm, someone will be walking out of here and he won’t be coming back. Which made Flick feel super confident, given she is a female. Simon spoke about the power of being on the bottom at the merge, given you’re elevated into the swing vote position and get to choose which side to work with. Well, unless you’re Sarah who was trying to play the middle pre-merge and like Julia before her, who promptly got run over by Michelle and Aubry. With that the tribe voted and Liz played her idol for Shonee as the OG Heroes looked ready to shit their pants. Dave then tried to get in her head, telling her it was a bad move, though she wisely held firm as four votes piled up on Shonee – with her offering a quiet thanks to Flick – before a single one landed on Liz followed by the alliance of seven holding firm and taking control, sending David out of the game and Flick straight to the top of the hit list.

And they looked so angry.

Despite wanting to toss his food on the table and walk out, as David arrived at Loser Lodge there was a part of my heart that felt sorry for his stumble. The stumble being, choosing not to work with Shiz instead of turning on them and trying to take control with the boring Heroes. Thankfully he felt bad for not working with our icons – particularly since it cost him a spot on the jury – so I assured him that despite being the first alpha out, he is one I would have happily seen last longer given I think he would have played things more interestingly in a few rounds. Which seemed to cheer him up. But even if it didn’t, he got a massive bowl of David Shakarakris Fries which sure as hell did the job!

Shaker fries season is my favourite time at McDonald’s, however lately they have been opting for new flavours rather than the OG – though the cheeseburger was stunning, TBH. This little copycat may not be a perfect replica of my beloved shaker fries, though it is bloody delicious. Spicy, sweet and oh so salty, this is the perfect snack while having a cold beer on a summer afternoon (or when hungover the next day).

Enjoy!

David Shakarakris Fries
Serves: 2 dear, athletic besties.

Ingredients
2 cups Jud Beerza Battered Fries
2 tsp kosher salt
1 tsp onion powder
1 tsp garlic powder
1 tsp paprika
½ tsp raw caster sugar
½ tsp beef stock powder
¼ tsp dried oregano
¼ tsp dried parsley
¼ tsp cayenne pepper
¼ tsp black pepper

Method
Cook the fries as per Jud’s recipe, or if going packet because they are just as great, as per their instructions.

Meanwhile combine the rest of the ingredients together in a small bowl and sprinkle a couple of teaspoons over the fries at first, before adjusting to taste. And devouring.

Excess of the mix can be stored in an airtight container in the pantry.


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Sharlami Vinson

Australian Survivor, Australian Survivor: Heroes V Villains, Snack, Street Food, TV, TV Recap

Previously on Australian Survivor we witnessed a tribal council so epic, I don’t even understand how we attack recapping it. Before we got to that point, Gerry survived his 48 hours at the Villains tribe before opting to return to the Heroes, despite not really vibing with them. The Villains then went on to lose another immunity challenge with Simon locking in the numbers to get rid of George as soon as they returned to camp. Sadly for him, Jordie was ready to make a move on Simon and get rid of him and his attitude, given it was way too toxic for most of the tribe. While everything looked set to send Simon out of the game with an (alleged) idol in his pocket, JLP surprised everyone with an individual immunity challenge at tribal council, which Simon promptly won. With his back against the wall, George blew everything up, telling Simon that Jordie had betrayed him and told everyone about his idol, while he would be playing his idol for himself. He then fractured Simon and Stevie’s bond, begging Simon to save sweet Stevie by playing his idol for him, and after breaking Stevie’s heart by refusing, the Spice Girls gagged the tribe by voting out Fraser instead.

The next day things were, how do you say, tense? Except for Stevie and Shiz, as he pulled the girls aside to share how grateful he is to them for saving him as he broke down in tears and ugh, it was beautiful. And what a full circle moment, since Shonee blindsided him their first season and he spent the first week hungry for revenge. 

Everyone came back together, hanging out in silence before Simon felt slapping Jordie over the back of the head was the best way to de-escalate the tension. Jordie once again proved to be mature, biting his tongue before Simon finally asked him to talk and then promptly berated Jordie for making the choices he made. While all Jordie knew was that he was absolutely screwed, though given he has Alex’s sister/Jay’s ex Sam Frost waiting for him at home, pregnant with their first child he has all the motivation he needs to dig deep and embrace the chaos. As such, Jordie caught up with Shiz by the well to bond over the trauma of tribal council while Shonee admitted that they need to work together because she actually trusts him.

Oh and then our Queen straight up pocketed a hidden immunity idol without a note or anyone noticing, despite it being right in front of all of them.

We did a check in with the Heroes where the tribe was so zen, they were straight up playing cricket and living their best lives. Gerry however wasn’t loving it, admitting that he only came back to the tribe for Sharni given they are so tight, however he knows he feels better among the Villains. The tribe caught up to grill him and while they were trying to be chill, Paige grew pretty tense in her line of questioning and as such, Gerry let slip that while he is with them, if they cross him, he will fight back. He then called out Sam for his stupid comment at tribal before Benjamin asked him why he voted for him, with Gerry pointing out he has a silver tongue. Which led to Ben asking him what, if anything, he told the Villains with Gerry iconically pointing out he didn’t really need to say anything, given the Villains cantell the alphas are on the top.

Benjamin admitted that he was grateful for Gerry pointing it out, given it clarified a few things in his head and ideally some others. Since he knows he is on the bottom, and wants to get himself into a better position. As he was whipping up food for the tribe, he found the Heroes version of Simon’s non-idol and while he was smart enough to realise that without a note, he has nothing, he viewed it as a clue and got to work hunting. All around the coconut hidden near their well. And damn, please find it my King – I need mum and dad to both jag idols in the one episode.

The tribes joined Jonathan in the jungle for the latest immunity challenge where Simon and George aired their dirty laundry for the Heroes. After George finished things by letting them know Simon still has an idol, JLP announced that in pairs the tribes would hold three blocks off the ground between their feet with the last tribe to have a block elevated taking out the win. So yeah, congrats Villains, Shonee has you! But if you want to talk about the challenge, David and Sam, Sharni and Paige and Ben and Gerry held up the blocks for the Heroes, while Jordie and Simon were paired, as were George and Stevie while Shiz were clearly poised to be the winning pair. 

Nearly instantly Gerry dropped out for the Heroes while Simon fought back tears as he dropped after ten minutes. George and Stevie soon followed, leaving Shiz to fight for their safety while the Heroes had two pairs going strong. And by strong, not really as Sam dropped leaving Sharni and Paige to fight for the Heroes. After an hour Paige developed a cramp and started to hold back tears as Shonee calmly told Liz to keep it together. JLP noticed our Queen was holding firm, asking how she went last time she did this challenge with Shonee pointing out she did two hours and she could easily do it again. Not that she needed to, as Sharni and Paige dropped after an hour as Liz told the Heroes they have plenty of excess meat they can cut off. Before she and Shonee held the idol arm in arm and skipped out of the jungle. 

While in contrast, Paige bitterly whispered to anyone that would listen about it being Sharni that dropped the block, not her. And who cares, you lost?

Back at camp Flick tried to lift everyone’s spirits, congratulating them on fighting so hard while Sharni agreed that when pain comes into it, it is all mental. Everyone split up to start scrambling, with Paige’s approach being to burst into tears to Nina, Flick and Hayley. And while they all tried to make her feel better, they also didn’t care who dropped the block, just that they were going to tribal council. The meat heads meanwhile quickly locked in the vote for the only queer, minority male on the tribe with Sam pretending it is because he is shifty. Which, ugh. They then loudly – and TBH, aggressively – pulled Gerry over, with Sam essentially telling him that he has to vote with them given he is close to the bottom. They locked in Sharni too, though warned her Gerry could be collateral damage should Ben play an idol. While they looped in the rest of the girls on the plan, Sam was shockingly astute enough to be nervous that said plan could easily fall apart.

Hayley caught up with Shaun only to be interrupted by Ben and while they pretended they were keen to get rid of Gerry, Ben knew he was in trouble and got back to hunting. Before finally, FINALLY, jagged the legit hidden immunity idol. And just like that, I can breathe. Sadly for him, it was all caught by Matt. Who immediately took the information back to Sam. Which, eyeroll. The duo then went person to person, telling them this means they should stick to the plan. Sadly when the information got back to Sharni, she only just learnt that it was a confirmed split vote on Gerry and as such, was not on board. Knowing he didn’t exactly want to burn the idol too soon, Ben caught up with Paige, who once again accused Sharni of throwing the immunity challenge. And as such, Ben had some leverage he felt he could use that night.

At tribal council Paige continued to push the narrative that she didn’t drop the block as Sharni started to straight up shoot her daggers while Flick cautioned Paige to hold her tongue. While Sharni calmly spoke about being super comfortable in the challenge, she then pointed out that Paige is playing a blame game when they should have celebrated the fact they made it an hour. While Paige denied blaming Sharni, Ben spoke up and called Paige on her lie and that she straight up accused Sharni of throwing the challenge. When she once again denied it, Ben got up to talk to the returnee females to tell them Paige was right and that they should change the vote from him to Sharni instead. He then flagged it with Shaun, while Sharni spoke about her disappointment about how things are blowing up on her.

Gerry spoke about feeling like he hasn’t had much luck with the Heroes, while Sharni spoke about the fact she has been nothing but honest with everyone and has been upfront about the fact she won’t write Gerry’s name down. Benjamin then pointed out that it is important that honesty and loyalty doesn’t make them naive before making a pitch to the tribe that they are now coming up to an important phase of the game and as such, they need hardened players around to survive further. Meaning this honest, loyal game isn’t really going to serve them any longer.

With that the tribe voted, Ben wisely played his idol – to mine and Hayley’s delight – leaving Sharni to tragically be eliminated. Much to Paige’s shit eating grin and my utter heartbreak for mother. As soon as she arrived at Loser Lodge I pulled her in for a massive hug and shared how disappointed I was that she and Ben ended up on opposite sides of the vote, given Paige would have been such a lovely pre-swap boot. But alas, she always has her successful acting career which I see prospering after she joins the latest Neighbours reboot. Alongside me, of course! Which is what I pitched to her as we smashed a freshly made Sharlami Vinson.

I know, I know – making salami from scratch is a big ask, when it is so easy to buy from the deli. But it is something I encourage everyone to try at least once in their life for a special occasion like a date with Sharns. Spicy, smokey and packed full of flavour, this simple little number is a delight.

Enjoy!

Sharlami Vinson
Serves: 2 dear friends.

Ingredients
2 tbsp Morton’s Tender Quick Meat Cure
2 tsp kosher salt
1 tbsp black pepper, ground
2 tsp mustard seed, ground
1 tsp chilli powder
3 drops liquid smoke
2kg beef mince

Method
Combine the Morton Cure and salt with two tablespoons of water to dissolve before adding the pepper, mustard seed, chilli and smoke.

In a large bowl, combine the mince with the spicy cure mixture and scrunch with your hands until it has come together.

Pop two long pieces of cling film on the bench and form the meat into a firmly packed cylinder in the middle of each. Tightly wrap with the cling to form a salami shape. Wrap the cylinders in foil before transferring to the fridge to chill for 24 hours to cure.

Once it has adequately cured, preheat the oven to 160C.

Carefully remove the salami from the wrapped and place on a lined baking sheet. Transfer to the oven to bake for about an hour, or until cooked through. Then either allow to cool completely or devour it still warm.


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Rogue Reuben

Australian Survivor, Australian Survivor: Heroes V Villains, Lunch, Main, Sandwich, TV, TV Recap, Vegetarian

Previously on Australian Survivor 24 castaways arrived in Samoa ready to prove who was better at the game, good or evil. While Sandra proved Villains generally do it better (multiple times), the Heroes went on a winning streak when it came to the immunity challenges, despite Rogue being the only true hero. Because despite winning all the rewards, the Villains sadly didn’t snag the Meat Tray that is the alpha athlete alliance. Back at the villains, after two losses in a row George found an idol while Simon found SOMETHING that he decided was an idol. With that in mind, Simon wanted to blindside George using the bling with Jordie trying to talk him out of it. At tribal council they floated the idea to Shiz who were not on board, instead talking the boys into taking out Mimi instead.

The next day at the dwindling Villains camp, George was busy hunting for his hat which Simon had burnt at tribal council the previous night in the hopes of being Sandra. That being said, he acted helpful, trying to figure out what happened to it before George gutted him by announcing he doesn’t really care about the damn hat, once again besting the nemesis. The nemesis he doesn’t even realise he has. With that out of the way, the tribe sat around eating cookies and reflecting on the excitement of the previous tribal council and changing the target from Stevie to Mimi at the last minute. Simon meanwhile was thrilled to have an idol, catching up with Jordie to show him what it looks like and well, Jordie’s reaction that it doesn’t look like one should be a warning to him.

We checked in with the Heroes – a good sign we might see a different tribe at tribal tonight – where Sharni was delighted as Paige whipped up some coconut rice. Poor Gerry wandered in with a foot injury with sweet Sharni looking after him, while Hayley was making sure he was fed and ugh, I love watching Sharni dote over him and stop him from working hard. She pointed out that the tribe was feeling pretty harmonious with the girls getting along, the boys bonding and well, Rogue just continued to offend and annoy everyone. Today she focused on how dumb the tribe are, not putting things under the shelter to stay dry. With Hayley summing it up as her working to reduce pain in the outside world, while Rogue had a solid knack for inflicting it.

Knowing she was an easy vote, Hayley started to get eager to go to tribal council and vote out Rogue though was concerned of her target as the sole winner in the cast. As such, she took Flick out to hunt for an idol under the cover of collecting wood. While they were on opposite sides on their original season, like Shonee, Flick was willing to work with Hayley for as long as it suits her. And then, and only then, will she stab her in the back and blindside her.

We caught up with Jonathan for the latest reward challenge – at the site of the very first challenge of the rebooted franchise – where the tribes would face off in trios to collect a football and then pass it to a kicker to score a goal. For an epic pizza party which, TBH feels super unfair for the Villains given the Heroes have not one but two AFL players. First up were the two AFL players, Sharni and Rogue versus Shiz, Simon and Jordie, with Shiz having to call out Rogue for being a psycho – who then told Liz she was a bit of a … – before David put them out of their misery and took out the point for Heroes after two misses from Jordie. Sarah, Stevie, George and Fraser faced off against Flick, Sam, Gerry and Matt with Sam being a bit of a jerk to George and Stevie and well, it was kind of a mess but thankfully Flick got it on her third kick and secured reward for the Heroes.

More importantly, every time Rogue uttered a word from the sideline, the Villains all rolled their eyes.

The Heroes were delighted to find their chest of pizzas back at camp until they realised they were all frozen. Oh and in one of the frozen pizza boxes, David and Sam found a clue to a hidden immunity idol. Though given he kept moving it from butt to taint and back again, I feel like it wasn’t as stealthily pocketed as he thought. Sam was thrilled to have found the clue for his allies, hopeful the idol will propel them to the end. And watching him try to figure out the clue with Shaun and David was hilarious, and I hope the plan to delay looking will come back to bite them. Shaun admitted that not having gone to tribal council puts them all on edge, given they need to draw a line in the sand and as such, he is not sure whether they should make the big move and target Hayley as a winner or get rid of an easy target Rogue who is, um, pretty awful and will delay they having to show their cards.

Hayley meanwhile realised that somebody had found the clue amongst the pizzas and as such, knew time was ticking for her to find the idol and protect herself should they go to tribal council. Speaking of which, she approached Shaun and Benjamin to float the idea of throwing the upcoming immunity challenge to get rid of Rogue. And while the boys were very much on board, her strategic mind to keep a strong 11 rather than a divisive 12 coming into a swap made Shaun more concerned about her.

We quickly reunited with my love JLP for the aforementioned immunity challenge where the tribes would have to hold on to a long log upside down elevated above the ocean with the last tribe to have two people holding on jagging immunity. After all the men on Heroes opted out other than Ben and Gerry – iconic, no – the tribes took their places with Jordie, Simon and Paige all struggling almost instantly. After four minutes Paige dropped, quickly followed by Flick and Benjamin. Simon was first to go from the Villains before Nina exited on the Heroes. Poor Gerry was next to go before Geroge dropped the Villains down to six versus three on the Heroes. As Stevie cheered on his tribe, Rogue dropped out of nowhere leaving Hayley and Sharni to fight for immunity before Hayley hilariously tried to look like she accidentally dropped, handing the jubilant Villains immunity.

As Sam wondered how Hayley actually dropped, given she looked so comfy. While Simon held Stevie in his arms as they celebrated.

Back at camp the tribe came together with the sit outs assuring the people that competed that they were impressed with how hard they fought, despite the loss. They then split up to plot with Nina and Hayley locking in the Rogue vote, with Nina ready for her to get spicy on the way out the door, given she is Rogue. Hayley went to Sharni to loop her in, followed by Flick who gave off the appearance that they didn’t even need to discuss it because, duh. The only thing that was a worry for Hayley was the potential spoiler of an idol, as such, suggesting they split on Gerry given he has an injured foot. 

After everyone reiterated the plan to get out Rogue was super obvious, the tribe caught up to smash some coconuts when Hayley realised that Rogue had disappeared. Not wanting Rogue to ruin her plans, Hayley pulled her aside to check what she was thinking with Rogue floating Shaun and David as options, while Shaun watched on from the bushes. Which made him once again suggest that getting rid of Hayley would make sense. Despite Rogue being the one to throw out his name. Paranoid, Shaun caught up with David and suggested they keep an eye on Hayley to make sure she doesn’t do anything wild. He then approached Flick to float the idea of them switching things up on Hayley with her admitting that it would be smart. She approached Nina who cautioned that they know Hayley is a limited time player, though I’m hopeful that means she means she needs to stay tonight because she will always be a target down the track.

The boys meanwhile were confident, busy locking in their votes for Hayley, as she was busy hunting for the idol. The Meat Tray then joined in the hunt, desperate to foil her plans, as Shaun jagged himself his first ever legit idol. Because let’s not forget that David completely duped him with a fakey. In any event, the find put some wind in his sails and got him ready to pull off a blindside. While Rogue told producers this isn’t a real tribal as there are no guns, so again, please don’t be stupid Shaun. Get Hayley later.

At tribal council – thankfully minus guns – Rogue popped her shirt near the fire to help it dry as she spoke about how the tribe didn’t get margs or sex like on a honeymoon, so it’s not like a honeymoon could even be over, thank you JLP! Reminding everyone she is way too abrasive. Hayley meanwhile spoke about the fact they’ve had so much time to build bonds given they spent the first week immune, meaning they should be able to make a smart decision rather than using petty reasons. Flick meanwhile felt the game had been on pause, so was ready to know where they stand after tonight while Gerry was grateful to be around such accomplished people. While Rogue reiterated that they weren’t all heroes, which again made everyone give a collective eye roll as she clarified only Matt and Gerry were heroes. When Paige questioned whether Rogue was actually a hero, she got very salty and aggressively argued with her, offended to not be called a hero.

This fired Nina up, who stepped in to point out Rogue can come across really poorly, schooling her for speaking to everyone like trash. While Paige offered a calm ‘I agree,’ despite simmering with rage. Rogue tried to downplay the way she comes across with Sam jumping in saying it is fine that she doesn’t like anyone, before she realised everyone wanted her out and as such, requested to go. Like a you can’t fire me, I quit. This left Sam confused, Hayley was scared of the simplicity and Shaun was ready to get rid of some tension. With that the tribe voted as Rogue heckled Paige, telling her it should be easy for her to write down a name, as poor Paige just appeared shocked by how someone could be such a jerk. Jonathan then tallied the votes, as they piled up on Rogue before gagging the tribe as four votes came in for sweet Gerry and one for Paige – who iconically told Rogue there is no love there to share – before we were finally free of Rogue.

As soon as she arrived at Loser Lodge, I asked Rogue to take a seat and talk me though why she had been saying and doing the things she has. Given, you know, my extensive feuds with celebrities – looking at you Annie Lennox – and the fact none of us are perfect. As we’ve seen play out on social media, there appear to be some deeper issues leading to the drama between her and Paige which humanised that feud for me, however there is no way to dance around they things she said to Nina. Thankfully though, she apologised unreservedly to Nina, so I in turn thanked her for fighting for animals, then decided to continue with culinary comfort as planned, serving up a Rogue Reuben rather than saving it for Benjamin to get two recipes instead.

Given Rogue is such a passionate animal activist, I wanted to give her a recipe that was vegetarian or vegan. And dare I say it, this is even better than a traditional reuben. Sweet and earthy with a bit of a kick, this is the perfect sandwich for a meatless Monday, no?

Enjoy!

Rogue Reuben
Serves: 2.

Ingredients
1 tbsp olive oil
10 button mushrooms, sliced
5 garlic cloves, minced
¼ head red cabbage, sliced
kosher salt and black pepper, to taste
¼ cup apple cider vinegar
2 tbsp horseradish
4 slices Ryan Ulrich Bread
¼ cup Russian dressing
4 slices Swiss cheese
2 tbsp unsalted butter

Method
To kick things off, divide the oil between two frying pans. In one, add the mushrooms and garlic with a good whack of pepper and cook until soft and golden. About 5 minutes. Meanwhile in the other pan, add the red cabbage and cook for a couple of minutes with a whack of salt and pepper. Stir in the vinegar and horseradish and cook for five minutes, by which time it should be a nice vibrant purple.

To assemble the sandwiches, spread the dressing on the bread, top two of the slices with mushrooms, some cheese, the cabbage and finally, another slice of cheese. Close the sandwiches and butter the top slice of bread with some butter.

Place a clean pan over medium heat and when nice and hot, place the sandwiches buttered side down in the pan. Cook for few minutes, or until golden and crisp. Carefully butter the top of the sandwiches and flip to cook the other side for a few minutes.

Serve immediately and devour, being careful to avoid getting burnt. By the cheese or a sharp tongue.


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Morriahti Young

Bread, Snack, Street Food, Survivor, Survivor 43, TV, TV Recap

Previously on Survivor – as you have already heard me gush – we were graced with the presence of one of the greatest personalities to take out the game, arguably since Sandra 2.0. Or maybe Tyson. Maryanne was funny, emotional and oh so charming, and watching her work her way to victory was downright delightful. Sadly though, we’ve got to drop the 2 as 43 kicked off – see what I did there, Probst – with three speedboats jetting through the water with 18 new castaways. And let’s just say, they aren’t the only things that are new – the editors have some tricks! There were drones, there were joke chyrons and even an intro for one. And it was fun.

But that isn’t what we’re here to discuss, though you know I’d gladly dedicate 2000 words to it. Survivor 43 is here and we first met Ryan, who looks like a total zaddy and I will already follow him to the ends of the earth. Nneka is cute and Morriah, for some reason, is here for RuPaul’s Best Friend Race. Sami meanwhile is my hair twin and makes up words, Lindsay is an adorable, iconic frontline hero and I stan her already, no wait, Karla is even more up my alley. Lindsay and Karla final two, please. Cody looks like a potential day 4 zaddy, Elie is going to see if she can use her psychology background better than Tori, and Owen is perfect, he is hair goals, he is THE moment.

The boats eventually made it to shore where Jeffrey proudly welcomed them to the Survivor family which immediately made Elie overwhelmed and a little shocked that it was actually happening. We first spoke with Jeanine who called Survivor a total dream for her and her immigrant father and well, I guess there needs to be more room on my stan card because I love her too. Sweet James was hoping to follow in his hero Earl’s footsteps while Gabler is the right kind of kookie to win my heart, while Paralympian Noelle spoke about how losing her leg was the best thing that ever happened to her and, gag of the season, she actually applied before she lost it. And the fact that she wants to make some leg jokes along the way makes me love her even more.

After a quick recap of the design of the game, Jeff announced they would be forming the Vesi, Baka and Coco – literally, coco – tribes. And would immediately be competing together in the first reward challenge where duos would run off one pair at a time to retrieve crates before the final duo build a cube and retrieve a key, with the first to finish earning a flint, a pot and a machete. Baka got out to the earliest of leads while Vesi nipped at the heels before they started to overtake in the water. It was then that Coco powered ahead out of nowhere, building their cube and working on retrieving their key way ahead of the others. Sadly, that proved super difficult which allowed for everyone to catch up before Dwight was given some good advice and able to jag victory for Vesi.

We first checked in with the victorious Vesi where Cody was all energy and on cloud nine about their victory. He shared that he binged Survivor during the pandemic and upon decided he had what it takes to win, was ready to live it for real. As the tribe introduced themselves, I immediately fell in love with Nneka and Justine – who is stunning – while Dwight got the clown music as he struggled to build the shelter which I hope is only the beginning of an underdog edit. Over at Baka, Gabler was nervous to already be at a disadvantage, given he is so much older than his fellow castaways, before they discovered their two options to earn their supplies, one a mental puzzle and the other to isolate two people to work hard. While Sami offered to sweat, the tribe chose to do the puzzle which required them to move two bones from a shape to create the largest number possible.

While they battled their wits, over at Coco Ryan and Geo offered to dig for four hours and while it seems like a stupid move, Ryan stripped down to his undies and as such, I’m moister than an oyster. Specifically the ones that spat on Kimmi and Monica in Second Chances. Ryan then opened up about his cerebral palsy and well, I love him even more and want him to win so bad. And that was before he even heroically dug out their reward in less than half an hour. Back at Baka the tribe continued to struggle over the puzzle, until Sami gamed the system out of nowhere and solved it for them at the exact moment I was smugly proclaiming how obvious the answer was. Which proved to be incorrect. While I sulked, Sami opened up about how proud he was to solve the puzzle despite being the youngest on the tribe and shared with us that because he is 19, he is totally planning to lie about his age to his tribe.

We returned to Vesi where Noelle was living her best life, glad to have not needed to go through another challenge to get their supplies and to have quickly aligned with Justine given they were vibing so well. Sadly for them, Nneka, Cody and Jesse noticed how tight they had become, immediately locking in their own alliance and well, Justine girl, you’re in danger. And no, please don’t make her the Jessie Camacho of the modern era because I can’t take that kind of pain again. Oh and Cody was busy targeting her for being in sales, despite being in sales himself which will totally come back to bite him, right? Right on queue, Jesse admitted he isn’t exactly sold on the alliance and as such, is willing to work with the girls, begging the question, what about Dwight?

Over at Baka as the tribe tried to build shelter, Owen was focused on building alliances. And by alliances, I mean assuring anyone in sight that he would let them know if he heard their name come up at all. Which is a great non-promise, but could still come back to bite you if people start talking. Meanwhile Elie and Morriah were bonding over their families with the former opening up about her older sister dying of an overdose during 2020 and ugh, it is heartbreaking to hear but seeing how it rallied the women together, I live. Because, duh, I always root for the all female alliances.

Coco’s shelter building meanwhile was looking to be going ok, but like Owen before her, Cassidy was more focused on building alliances. Hearing my call, those alliances were specifically with the women on her tribe and the fact that they know how difficult the game is for women, I live for it. Sadly for my love Ryan, though, they wanted to bring in James to take control over the tribe and ice out my zaddy. Baka meanwhile had changed their focus as the men started working on building a fire as Sami explained that cremating pets is not murder, but disposing of their bodies. Which I thought was obvious, but great! In any event, he made fire while Gabler wandered off to try and form a bond with Elie over heavy metal bands and do I ship this? Probably. Do I ship it as much as the two all female alliances? God no.

The next day Coco were living their best lives, getting camp set up while Karla and Geo bonded over being queer, married members of the Latinx community and fuck me dead, THIS is the final two I want now, please and thank you. Despite the fact it kinda means my love Ryan is screwed. Well, unless Karla sides with the boys, given she clearly holds all the damn power in the tribe. We pivoted to Vesi where Jesse was opening up about growing up in gangs as a teen before he turned his life around while in juvenile detention. He now had a PHD with two adorable kids and is proud to be a hope for other people and ugh, he is the sweetest. Oh and while Jesse formerly had gang tattoos, Cody had LIVIN tattooed on his butt.

After the tatt talk dissipated, Justine focused on trying to get fire started for their tribe and while she was struggling, she was happy the shelter was doing good at least. At that exact moment, the shelter collapsed before she sparked a flame. Which sadly then went out, which gives off big retrograde energy. Thankfully they were distracted by the arrival of a speedboat directing them – and the two other tribes at the same time – to select one person to get on said boat for a little adventure. While Lindsay wanted to bounce at Coco, they drew numbers with Karla winning out, Gabler won Baka’s random draw while Dwight was just allowed to go, rather than any game of chance.

The trio met up at the famed quest island – formerly the Edge of Extinction – where they were thrilled to discover they didn’t need to walk up to the top of the island, instead wading through the shallows to a large rock. Shallows that were riddled with moss and oysters, so actually more dangerous than a stroll up a hill. Eventually they made it, learning that instead of a ship wheel, they now get to openly announce whether they want to risk their votes at the first tribal council, with them each selecting their fate out of a bag corresponding with how many people chose to risk it. Ultimately Gabler and Dwight opted to risk, while Karla was wise to play it safe. And more importantly to her, avoid painting a target on her back.

Back at Vesi the tribe were still heartbroken to not have fire before Justine once again managed to get flame, and this time managed to keep it alight. As Dwight returned to camp he opted to keep things truthful, knowing that everyone knows what those journeys are all about anyway. And while he was totally honest, Cody was not buying any of it and as such started sowing seeds of doubt about him amongst the tribe. At Baka, Gabler also told the tribe the truth before going for a walk and discovering he had jagged an idol for the next two tribal councils and while everyone else celebrated with him, they seem to be ignoring the fact it means he is safe and they are not. Which is never good.

Speaking of safety, Jeffrey returned for the first immunity challenge of the season where the tribes would have to race through obstacles to release three balls, dig under a log, climb up a ramp, cross a balance beam and solve one of three table mazes. With them getting to choose which one, based on the order they arrive. Oh and sticking around from last season, the losers not only go to tribal council but have to forfeit their flint. Coco got out to an early lead while Vesi and Baka struggled to get under their logs. Specifically the latter as Jeanine got straight up stuck. As Vesi and Baka tried to close the gap, Coco landed all their balls and jagged immunity leaving the other tribes to desperately fight for the second win. Which eventually went to Vesi after they got their eye in, sending a defeated Baka to tribal council.

Back at camp the tribe quickly pivoted from disappointment to scrambling, with Sami in particular looking forward to getting their games started. Knowing he was kind of responsible, Gabler knew the target would be on his back and as such, mentioned he will not be playing his idol and instead, decided he would play his Shot in the Dark instead. Which Elie obviously thought was a terrible idea, instead telling him that they can’t afford for him to lose his vote and that he needs to pull his head in. With that out of the way, Elie, Jeanine and Owen went off and locked in the vote against Morriah, while Morriah and Sami were locking in their votes against Owen instead. Mainly because Gabler is too unpredictable to be able to trust or target. When the duo caught up with Jeanine and Elie, Elie assured us that while saying she wants to keep women strong, she wanted to focus on tribe strength. And just like that, this female alliance is already looking to be DOA.

At tribal council Sami spoke about how wonderful the vibe was at camp before losing the immunity challenge, ready to ride it out until the final 6 together. Owen agreed things were great, though suggested it instead had more to do with the fact nobody wanted to paint a target on their back. Gabler admitted that while not scrambling earlier could put them at a disadvantage, he is still glad they bonded as a tribe. Oh and then Morriah suggested they were all winners, because they tried. Sami rightly pointed out moral victories don’t keep you in the game, while Elie agreed but suggested they still need to form the right bonds too. Talk then turned to some sort of text analogies – don’t tell Teresa Giudice – before Sami reminded everyone that while they are friends, someone is about to have regrets.

Which obviously meant it was time to vote where Gabler surprisingly kept hold of his Shot in the Dark before Morriah was surprisingly chill to discover that she had become the latest member of the Sonja Christopher club. Or in Drag Race terms, the Porkchop.

As soon as she arrived at Loser Lodge, I pulled Morriah in for a massive hug and assured her that while Survivor may not be the best place to make friends, I will always be proud of the positive, kind, spirit that she brought into the game. Within a small tribe situation, it is even harder to navigate the pre-merge section of the game and when everyone is getting along and contributing like the tribe were, it almost becomes a game of lucky dip. And let’s just say, after that little peptalk and a Morriahti Young or two, she was feeling 100 again.

Despite how the kinda clunky name makes it sound, these roti – not raita – are completely delicious. Fresh, fluffy and melt in your mouth, once you’ve tried a roti from scratch, you’ll never go back to pre-bought. Particularly since they are so damn easy!

Enjoy!

Morriahti Young
Serves: 4.

Ingredients
300g flour
½ tsp kosher salt
¼ tsp black pepper, ground
250ml chilled water
30g butter, melted
vegetable oil

Method
Combine the flour, salt and pepper in a large bowl and make a well in the centre. Stir in the water until it all comes together, before transferring to a floured surface and kneading for about 5 minutes.

Split the dough into 8 equal portions and form into balls. Working one at a time, roll a ball to form a 20cm wide disc and brush with some melted butter. Roll into a cigar, then roll parallel to form into a small scroll, kind of like Inception of rolling or a quick laminate of croissants. Now flatten the scroll into a disc and roll back out to form a disc. Repeat the process with the remaining portions.

To cook, pop a heavy skillet over medium heat and brush with the oil. Add the roti and cook for a minute or two, before flipping and cooking for another minute or until golden on both sides and nicely puffed. Repeat with the remaining bread then, obvi, devour.


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Boskorean Beef Dumplings

Main, RuPaul's Drag Race, RuPaul's Drag Race 14, Snack, Street Food, TV, TV Recap

Previously on RuPaul’s Drag Race the final five were tasked with writing and recording their own verse for Ru’s new single Catwalk. And star in the music video after designing a runway worthy outfit for the shoot. So like Erika Girardi-Jayne, yeah, they were under a lot of stress. While Daya arguably stomped the competition, Camden giving the judges something different gave her her third and final win of the season. After Bosco was sent to safety, Angeria and Willow were left to lip sync for the last spot in the finale before Ru gagged them by giving us our first top five fighting for the crown.

But before that, the dolls had to reune. Third-but-officially-first boot June came to slay in an all orange number, Angeria was perfection in lilac, Bosco had my heart as a Super Mario boss, Daya was golden, Camden was gothic glamour and Willow was demented and delightful. But it was Kornbread’s look which stole the show, riffing on Willow’s entry line though with ‘angle’ switched out for ‘ankle’ and ugh, I live. Ru opened the show by acknowledging his passion for keeping the girls around and leaving a bunch of episodes without an elimination before an epic recap of the season that was and damn, girl, even I was crying. 

Kerri spoke about how universally beloved she is and how amazing it was to open for JLo with Jorgeous and Alyssa. Oh and how weird it is to be recognised, which isn’t overly interesting except for Camden reading Orion for looking like Kelly Mantle on the reunion stage. June was delighted to be a meme queen for her first chocolate moment, though wished she didn’t wear a little pussycat wig when it happened. Kornbread spoke about how heartbreaking it was to be medically removed before shading the girls and assuring them Snacth Game would have been better if she was there. We then recapped Kornbread’s family trauma before learning that the show helped them heal and that they even all attended one of her gigs in South Carolina recently.

We then recapped Jasmine and Kornbread’s drama with the latter admitting that she was not the only person wanting Jasmine to shut up, just the only person not editing themselves on TV. Camden praised Jasmine for taking it with such a good attitude and for becoming a relentless beacon of happiness and joy. As she cockroached through the season.

Speaking of insects, we then addressed the drama between Daya and Jasmine and well Daya looked pissed as they waited for the recap to end. When it did, she admitted that she stands by everything she said, before blaming Jasmine for always poking her at the wrong time. Jasmine then straight up destroyed her, pointing out that she was rude and hateful but Jasmine always only came back in a respectful tone. Jorgeous then jumped in and pointed out that Daya’s attacks were personal and it came across like she had no respect for either of them. While she tried to accept that and explain herself, Alyssa cut her off and called her a bitch which led to Daya breaking down in tears while June jumped in and spoke about how Daya is a genuinely kind person but just may not handle the stress well.

This annoyed Alyssa and Orion before Maddy jumped in to point out a bunch of queens have been shady and were saying the same things that Daya had done and as such, they need to stop being so harsh on her. Which led to Jasmine tearing her a new one before Kerri jumped in, summed it up, pointed out Daya is getting way too much hate and horrible treatment online and then got everyone to be friends again. And Daya acknowledged that she is fairly certain she is just an older version of Jasmine.

We then addressed Alyssa being the trade of the season before she admitted to being single and hung. Which again, is important. Very important.

All loved up, Camden and Angeria spoke about their passion for each other. Which essentially is just their accents. And um, ARE THEY ACTUALLY DATING?! Ru then outed Jorgeous’ showmance with Orion and damn, I’d watch that porno. I mean, they held hands on the bus back to the hotel and ugh, I live. We then pivoted to the Kornbread and Willow platonic love story with Willow admitting that she is going to get Kornbread’s broken ankle tattooed on her arse.

Maddy opened up about how great (and horrible) the fandom had been, though was grateful for the unwavering support of her sisters. With Angie and Alyssa talking about how great it was to show some diversity, before Maddy reiterated that not all straight people should get into drag. Oh and then said that people need to deal with their toxic masculinity to end homophobia and transphobia and, ugh, I love her still. Particularly after we recapped her fight with Jasmine with them admitting that they just leaned into the moment and while it escalated and went off the rails, they were gassing themselves up for the lip sync and loving it. While Willow loved that that is the moment where she realised she was finally on the show.

We then spoke about Jasmine coming out as trans during Untucked and damn, it was still just as emotional, but seeing the dolls rally around each other was just beautiful. Jasmine opened up about how huge the moment was, though she is grateful to finally be living her truth. Kerri joked that she was glad to have another trans sister, before speaking about how she desperately wanted to keep the heart in the moment to make sure Jasmine knew that she was loved and how special she is. Ru then asked about the experiences of all the trans queens in the season with Bosco talking about how she has received nothing but love from the fans. Kornbread said she was nervous about her own coming out, knowing she had to address it with her family while Willow joked that she was glad to now be living her life with even bigger cheeks.

We then addressed the Bosco and Camden Moulin Ru! fight, with Bosco admitting she had no issues and while she was a bitch, she reminded everyone that drag queens are bitches. Bosco then screamed at Camden about how much she loves her and damn, their play-fight was amazing. 

Kerri then recapped the myriad of fights of the reunion thus far before they looked into everyone’s runways. And while it was fun, somehow Orion decided to come for Kerri about her ACTUAL J-Lo look. Maddy was then gifted the Golden Boot award for her Maddy and Daddy Morphosis look. Kornbread admitted that she did pay Daya for eating a dragonfly, Orion was disappointed to have missed Girl Groups and Snatch Game and DeJa did a cameo as Lil Jon.

Ru opened the library for the dolls that missed the challenge with Maddy slaying, telling June she should be named February instead and called out Camden for not having a lip. Alyssa then read Orion for being bland and boring, June read Jasmine for being destroyed in the Snach Game lip syncs and Kornbread for shit shoes, then Kornbread read her for filth for literally everything. And well, then Orion bombed. Badly. Leading to Maddy suggesting she should change her name, given you can’t be a story if you can’t read. Oh and Kornbread read DeJa for only having 12 followers.

Daya then closed the show by apologising to Jasmine and Jorgeous but encouraged both of them to call her whenever they needed as her phone is literally always on. With the duo both agreeing that it will take time, but there are no hard feelings. Oh and then Maddy was hilarious, calling Ru heterophobic for putting two design challenges so close together when she would have slayed so many more.

The focus turned to the top five, with Angeria’s low point being Snatch Game while her high point was Ru talking about being consistently impressed by her. Bosco’s low was everyone wanting her to go home but her high point was talking shit about people to victory for all of her wins. Daya’s low point was being sent home first, which was her high point too because it woke her the fuck up. Camden’s low point was looking a mess like the Family Guy creep in the girl group challenge while her high was winning three challenges and surprising everyone. Willow’s low point was Kornbread leaving while her high point was popping spaghetti in the bath. Which is iconic.

And just like that, the reunion was done and I went done the alphabet before hissing at Bosco to get over here and come celebrate her killer run with me. From start to finish, I lived for everything Bosco had to offer from her sass to her chill vibe and kooky aesthetic. And while I don’t want to get into my conspiracy theory that she was only ever eliminated because she had the golden ticket, that dip – and Snatch Game, but they all sucked – was the only real low point of her run and as such, I don’t count her out in the race for the crown just yet. And if she does lose, she’ll alway have Boskorean Beef Dumplings, I guess!

A little bit punchier that a regular dumpling, these babies have a glorious little kick on the inside. While still being juicy, sweet and wrapped in a beautifully pillowy dough. Aka, you know they are good and I love them. Just like Bosco.

Enjoy!

Boskorean Beef Dumplings
Serves: 8.

Ingredients
500g beef mince
1 onion, finely diced
1 cup wombok, shredded and wilted
½ cup firm tofu, finely diced
100g glass noodles, soaked in boiling water and roughly chopped
5 garlic cloves, minced
1 tbsp soy sauce
1 tbsp sesame oil
1 tbsp gojuchang 
1 tsp kosher salt
1 tsp ground black pepper
40 gow gee wrappers

Method
Combine everything but the gow gee wrappers in a large bowl and mix together with your hands.

Lay out the wrappers on a bench and place a tablespoon of filling in the centre of each. Dip a finger in water and wet the edges before folding, pleating and mashing them closed – depending on skill level or care for the aesthetic. Repeat the process until they are all gone.

To cook, get a steamer going over high heat and cook the dumplings, 5-10 at a time depending on the size, for about 5-10 minutes, or until the wrapper is gorgeously soft and silky and the filling cooked. Repeat until all dumplings are done, replenishing the water as needed. 

Devour immediately with whatever sauce you fancy.

You can also freeze them uncooked in an airtight container and cook them from frozen, giving them an extra couple of minutes in the steamer to defrost.


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Josh Karaagate Chicken

Australian Survivor, Australian Survivor: Blood V Water, Main, Poultry, Snack, Street Food, TV, TV Recap

Previously on Australian Survivor 12 pairs made up of 20 new castaways, 3 veterans and 1 very special imported queen were marooned in the Australian Outback. The paris were split up from their loved ones and forced to compete as the hilariously named Blood and Water tribes. Sandra was obviously an icon, as was her daughter Nina who tragically got injured and medevaced from the competition like she was Khanh’s pants, as he repeatedly got dacked in challenges. Alliances were made and broken, daughters voted out mothers, sisters voted out sisters, Sam straight up stole an idol from someone’s pocket. One by one they were eliminated – most recently, the iconic KJ – until only four remained with Mark, Shay, Josh and Chrissy ready to battle it out for the win.

The tribe awoke on Day 46 with Shay excusing herself from camp to centre herself ahead of the final immunity challenge. She opened up about fighting hard to make it to this point, almost grateful that she lost Ben so early so she could fight all on her own. And damn, I’m as proud of her as she is of herself. We next heard from Josh and while it took us ten episodes to hear from him, his post-swap game was quite dominating and he truly has played a strong strategic game. However, given we haven’t been shown too much of that, I feel his fears about Shay winning final immunity may come to fruition and prove to be his spoiler.

Chrissy reflected on her time in the game, shocked by how much she has changed, particularly since she is well positioned to make it to the end. And given she has played far and away the best social game, she truly is well positioned to take out the win if she can articulate her game to the jury. If. Mark meanwhile reflected on how much Survivor has shaped his life, given it is how he met his wife, so thanks to the game, he has his son. Mark spoke about how proud he is to have completely flipped his game on its head from his first season to the second and as such, he is ready to take out the win.

The final four met with Jonathan on a cliff over the water where they learnt that this is officially the final immunity challenge of the season and that this year, they will have a final three. Jonathan then pulled out a phone and gave them all a taste from home with Chrissy’s kids promising to pop the cordials on ice, Mark broke down to hear Harry tell him that he loves him before Sam’s mum told him that his mum would be watching over him today and ugh, why am I bloody sobbing?! Like me, Shay sobbed as soon as she heard Ben and her parents voices and well, it was so damn pure. And then Josh spoke to his pregnant fiance and damn, Jonathan, there better be an ad before this challenge because I need to work through these tears.

But back to the challenge, the final four would each have to hold on to pegs hanging over a waterfall, moving further and further down them until there is only one person left standing. Who would progress directly to the final three, while one of the remaining trio would become the final member of the jury later that night. After breezing through the first level, all four moved on to the third peg as Chrissy wondered how in the hell any of them would reach the final one. While everyone appeared to struggle, Shay stood like a statue and honestly, I can’t tell if the outcome is just that obvious or, somehow, she is going to drop despite people fearing her winning this one since the merge.

Everyone made it to the fourth peg after an hour with Chrissy chatting away to Jonathan about how talking to her kids has made her focused on winning the season and as such, the boys should be nervous. Essentially. Since she spoke about needing to go with her head over her heart. After moving to the fifth peg, the pain really started to get to Chrissy though she managed to push through until the sixth peg before she ultimately dropped after more than 90 minutes. Mark started to struggle while Shay calmly stretched and breathed through the pain before Josh dropped out of nowhere mere minutes after Chrissy. After progressively getting more and more uncomfortable, Mark lost his grip and fell into the water handing Shay final immunity.

Just as everyone has been predicting all season.

Back at camp the tribe gave the usual half-hearted congratulations to Shay who was thrilled to be guaranteed to make it to the end. Given she is super kind, she apologised to everyone for ruining their plans before the boys went away for a chat. Which confused the hell out of the girls, given they are both going to the end. Shay and Chrissy caught up to decide who was the lesser threat out of the boys. Josh meanwhile was feeling like an absolute mastermind, telling Mark that they should both vote for Chrissy and hope that the girls don’t come up with a consensus and as such, they win out. Or, worst case, they go to fire.

Mark went back to camp to pitch voting out Josh to Shay while Josh moped to Chrissy about how they were both accepting of their fate and as such, they weren’t even going to try to get rid of her. Sadly for Josh, Mark had zero interest in going to the final three with him and as such, genuinely pushed for Chrissy and Shay to join him in voting Josh out. Particularly since he has a strong resume and is genuinely likeable. Sadly for common sense, the thought of voting out Josh breaks her heart and as such, Chrissy was unsure whether she can bring herself to do it. Despite knowing that sitting next to him essentially guarantees she loses.

At tribal council Shay admitted she was thrilled that everyone tried so hard in the challenge despite obviously destroying them. Chrissy attributed her performance to talking to her kids, with Mark agreeing how amazing it was to speak to his son as Sam quietly sobbed from the jury bench. Talk turned to the fact both Josh and Mark were in danger, with Josh admitting that he is well and truly bricking it. Mark meanwhile acknowledged that there really isn’t much any of them could do today, so he is hopeful that the bonds he built throughout the season will keep him safe.

Chrissy said that she is heartbroken to have to vote out one of the boys while Shay admitted that she is looking forward to seeing things implode a bit. Which is exactly what was happening as Josh started whispering to Chrissy that she needs to vote for Mark in the hope of confusing her. Which didn’t happen as Chrissy finally made the right move, banded together with Mark and Shay to boot Josh from the game as the final juror.

While Josh was obviously super disappointed to miss out on a place in the final tribal council, he was thrilled to join the iconic Australian Survivor Fourth Place Robbed Goddess club. And, you know, to be going back home to a pregnant fiance. As such, the visit was less about sorry you lost and more, congratulations for all you’ve got ahead of you. Most importantly, a big batch of fresh Josh Karaagate Chicken.

Karaage chicken is one of those things you can eat no matter what the time or your mood. A little sweet, a hint of spice, a gorgeous crunch and a big punch of juicy chicken; it is, to me, perfect.

Enjoy!

Josh Karaagate Chicken
Serves: 4.

Ingredients
2 tsp grated ginger
5 garlic cloves, minced
2 tbsp dry sake
3 tbsp soy sauce
2 tsp raw caster sugar
500g boneless chicken thighs, cut into large bitesize chunks
peanut oil, for fryin’
1 cup potato starch
½ tsp kosher salt
½ tsp black pepper
1 lemon, cut into wedges

Method
Combine the ginger, garlic, sake, soy and caster sugar in a large bowl, and toss through the chicken until well coated. Cover and pop in the fridge to marinate overnight.

When you’re ready to cook, pop a few inches of oil in a deep pot and place over medium heat until nice and hot. Take the chicken out of the fridge and combine the potato starch in a bowl with the salt and pepper. Working a few pieces at a time, toss the chicken in the starch and then gently pop in the oil to fry for a few minutes, or until golden and crispy and cooked through. Transfer to a baking sheet lined with paper towel to drain and repeat the process until done.

Then, serve piping hot with some lemon wedges and wasabi mayo. And devour.

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Sophie Cacio e Pepe Gnocchi

Australian Survivor, Australian Survivor: Blood V Water, Main, Pasta, TV, TV Recap, Vegetarian

Previously on Australian Survivor the tribes joined Jonathan by the water where he decide to make things exciting by switching up the tribes. While that resulted in Croc and Chrissy, Josh and Jordan, and Sandra and Nina reuniting, odd-man-out Mark was given the chance to join Sam on the new Water tribe, and instead elected to join Blood. Sophie meanwhile was reunited with Sam, making things, in a word, very awkward given the blindside. After Nina and Sandra lost the immunity challenge, new Blood quickly planned to take out Mel for being clumsy until Nina’s allies decided it would be far more interesting to blindside her mum instead. Caught between and rock and a hard place, Nina joined her allies to take out her iconic mother Sandra. On Day 16. AGAIN. Like fucking bullshit.

Back at camp Nina was shocked to have gone full Ciera on her mum, while the tribe checked in with her to make sure she was feeling ok with them all banding together to take out the Queen. Which she humbly – and wisely – said was ok and that she completely expected it to happen eventually.

The next morning she was quietly reflecting in her mother’s hammock while the tribe caught up by the fire, trying to give her some space while she processed everything. She opened up to us about how the move should benefit her in the long run, given it shows her loyalty to the alliance despite the personal pain it caused. She then joined the rest of her tribe and was delighted to catch a fish, feeling her oats at everything looking up. Jordie then opened up about how great it was to claim Sandra’s scalp, given it is such a big move, though sadly he ignored the fact it is still very early in the game and half the potential jurors weren’t even around to see it. Jordie caught up with Mark, Jordan and Josh to lock in their allegiance to each other, gossiping about who they would target next, defaulting back to last night’s original target Mel.

Meanwhile over at Water, Khanh was hosting another episode of Survivor Kitchen – don’t come for my gig, sweet angel Khanh! – with Sam giving some awkward acting as a studio quest. Thankfully she quickly snapped out of it to remind us that she and Sophie are still feuding, and given the daggers being shot her way, she is well and truly right to be worried. As Soph continued to wander around bitching about Sam, Sam wisely darted around to her people to remind them how dangerous and angry Sophie is before calmly leaving them to reflect. Michelle meanwhile was hanging with Sophie and KJ, hilariously telling them she is thrilled to not have to deal with her sister yet given it could ruin her game.

As the duo looked on, wide eyed and fearing for their place in the game.

Sophie then caught up with Sam to talk strategy while she was chatting to KJ, suggesting that maybe now is the time to secretly work together given nobody would expect it. Sophie once again threw out Khanh’s name, with Sam all smiles and agreeing it was a great idea. After Sam walked away, Sophie confronted her sister to find out what they were talking about before she arrived and repeatedly told KJ she was fine with her pretending like she doesn’t care about her trying to stay out of the Sophie-Sam drama. When she cared. Truly, madly, deeply cared.

The tribes reconvened with Jonathan for the latest immunity where they would each have to line up and hold discs between their hands like paper dolls with the last tribe with a disc left standing taking out immunity. Since both Sam and Mark had played the challenge before, they each gave differing advice as Sam told them to put strong people together, focusing on similar heights while Mark just told them all to keep moving, focusing on blood flow and staying alert. After Jonathan threw shade at Chrissy for struggling, Amy and Mel became the first to drop. They were quickly followed by the disc between Chrissy and Croc, and the one between Sam and Michelle. Josh then dropped out for Blood, followed by Michelle and Jesse for Water. It came down to Mark and Jordan and Jordie and Dave battling against Ben and Sophie and Chrissy and KJ.

Sophie then started to struggle, directing Ben how to help her reset before ultimately dropping, pinning all her hope on Chrissy and KJ. Aka our iconic challenge beast queens. Mark and Jordan meanwhile started doing micro-moves to stay focused, as Mark reminded us that the last time this challenge was played it was won by him and Henry and ugh, I am living for Mark’s quiet confidence right now. Tragically I did not love watching Chrissy and KJ struggle as they were desperately trying to hang on for their tribe, arms shaking and fumbling before ultimately dropping and handing immunity to Blood.

As the tribes hugged each other in congratulations, Sam whispered to Mark that Sophie was coming for her before he encouraged her to take her out quickly. And yes, this is the fight I need to shake me out of my post-Sandra-boot depression. 

Back at camp the tribe congratulated KJ and Chrissy on a job well done before Sam immediately got to work taking out the biggest threat to her game. She and Jesse quickly locked in the plan with Jesse agreeing that Sophie doesn’t seem to realise it was the entire tribe trying to get her out, not just Sophie, and more importantly, it is the entire tribe wanting to get rid of her again. They then caught up with Ben, Michelle, Khanh, Croc and Chrissy to lock in a plan to split the vote, putting two on KJ as a back up. With Sam requesting she be one of the votes for Sophie.

Back at camp Ben went for a walk with Sophie and instead suggested voting out Khanh instead, with them joining up with Chrissy, Croc, Jesse and Sam to float the idea. Sophie even suggested Sam go so far as to talk about how much they hate each other and that she needs her out to really sell it. Everyone was keen to get rid of him, particularly with Sophie as the person they split the votes with so she goes if he does play the idol. That being said, it was all actually bullshit and Croc had no intention of turning on Khanh and as such, it was all a distraction to get rid of Sophie and finish the job.

Assuming nobody is confused by the duelling plans.

When Chrissy, Sam, Jesse and Ben caught up, they were all well and truly confused with Chrissy thinking the plan was still Sophie, Sam thinking that was the plan too, Ben thinking the Khanh plan was legit while Jesse now wanted the Khanh one to be legit so he could take out an idol and make the game a little safer. While Chrissy worried to us that she would pull a Cara and cook the vote. Even after the ad break the group were still confused, leading to Croc pulling Chrissy aside to make sure she was onboard with the correct plan. Michelle joined them to make sure Chrissy was all over it and when they finally got it through to her, we cut to KJ and Sophie hunting for an idol and oh god, she is getting an idol, isn’t she?

KJ caught up with Chrissy to complain about how selfish Sophie is for hunting for an idol in plain sight, given it is spooking the tribe into splitting the vote on her. Thankfully KJ caught up with Croc who calmly looped her in on the plan and assured her she won’t be going home on his watch, which made her feel a little calmer. When she caught up with Khanh, he encouraged her to prioritise what is best for her game and hot damn, are we getting back to back family boots? While Sam was trailing Sophie and Ben on their idol hunt, Sophie started saying things that made it sound like she had found an idol, however she didn’t seem to move, making me think it was all a fake-out. But whatever it is, I was confused as they exited camp and living for how damn entertaining Sophie has been.

At tribal council Chrissy spoke about how hectic things were back at camp after the challenge, admitting multiple plans were in play and that frankly she just needs to wait and see what happens. Ben agreed that while there are multiple plans, there is one he plans to stick with, filling Sophie with delight. Khanh admitted the idol makes him a target, so he wouldn’t be shocked to get votes tonight. Sophie then opened up about how she is super loyal and that she is definitely going to do what she says. While Sam reiterated she is telling some truths, Sophie fired up and fought back at Sam and while I was living for it as an audience, poor KJ started to break down over the fact she feels trapped by having her sister on the tribe.

Chrissy assured her that she would be freaking out if it was her and her sister with poor KJ just saying how tired she is with everything. Sophie tried to calm her sister and let her know that she is ok before pointing out that there are bigger strategic and social threats in the tribe, which turned conversation back to Khanh. Who was thrilled to have drama deflecting from his idol. He then said that multiple idols could show up tonight, with Croc agreeing that should Sophie have an idol, the game will flip upside down. As Sophie continued to play coy about whether she found one, while poor KJ reiterated it will be her going home should multiple idols appear.

With that the tribe voted and after Sophie pretended to pull out an idol, none were actually played and instead KJ followed in Nina’s footsteps, joining the tribe to vote out her sister like a damn icon.

Sophie was delightfully chipper by the time she made it back to Loser Lodge, thrilled to be out of the environment and not thrown through another emotionally jarring non-elimination. As a fellow internet celebrity slash influence, Soph and I have long run in the same circles, so I pulled her in for a massive hug and thanked her for providing such glorious entertainment in her short run. After that, we laughed and toasted her success with a piping hot bowl of Sophie Cacio e Pepe Gnocchi.

And oh, it was glorious. Everyone knows that potato and cheese are the two most comforting foods, and in such a polished combination, they truly are transcendent. Pillowy gnocchi, a sharp punch of parmesan and the spice of pepper work together to thoroughly warm your soul.

Enjoy!

Sophie Cacio e Pepe Gnocchi
Serves: 2-4

Ingredients
500g gnocchi
4 tbsp unsalted butter
130g parmesan, grated
1 ½ tbsp black pepper, freshly ground

Method
Cook the gnocchi per packet instructions, drain and reserve 500ml of the cooking water.

Meanwhile, heat the butter in a large frying pan over medium heat. Add the gnocchi and fry for a couple of minutes before folding through the cheese and pepper, along with half of the cooking water. Raise the heat and cook stirring until combined, adding more water to loosen the sauce to your desired consistency. Season to taste.

Transfer to bowls and devour, in honour of our pre-merge icon!


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Triple Pork, Corndra Cheeaz-Twine

Australian Survivor, Australian Survivor: Blood V Water, Main, TV, TV Recap

Previously on Australian Survivor Sophie was feeling her oats as the cockroach of the season, despite the fact she only miraculously dodged the boot twice in a row due to a twist and Alex quitting rather than skill or gameplay. Identifying Khanh as a big threat, she realised aligning with him could be mutually beneficial and approached him about aligning. Which he sadly had zero interest in. With Sophie gone from the tribe, the alphas were outnumbered on Blood, though after losing the immunity challenge miraculously were able to make some new friends. After Amy found an idol, she was ready to make a strike on Sandra and take control, however the Queen had already sadly scooped them up as they banded together to boot Amy’s bestie Jay.

The next day things were very zen over at the Water tribe as Nina shared how well positioned she was in the tribe and how she was excelling at the game. While I would have loved to hear more from Nina, I was just as distracted as the cameraperson was when her ally Jordie started to repeatedly flash his bum. And just like that, I was back to stanning our overall king. Despite the excitement and the joy of hearing how well Nina is playing, I couldn’t help but become filled with dread as she opened up about being confident in her chances of making it to the end.

The two tribes reconvened with Jonathan where Sam spoke about how united their tribe was, which perfectly cued up JLP to tell them to drop their buffs. Yep, it’s tribe swap time! Given there were 19 people remaining, Sandra, Amy, Dave and Jordan were joined by Shay, Nina, Jordie, Josh and Mel on Blood, while Khanh, Chrissy, KJ and Sophie welcomed Sam, Michelle, Croc, Ben and Jesse on Water, leaving poor Mark tribeless. Well, for a moment, as he was given the right to choose which tribe to join, ultimately selecting to join Blood. Much to the absolute rage of his wife Sam, who was SO ready to play with him. Not wanting to play with their loved one however was Nina, who was heartbroken to be on a tribe with her mother given she now has a huge target on her back. And once again, dread.

Before we could enjoy any drama, Jonathan explained that to take out the reward four people at a time from each tribe would battle in a boat tug-o-war competition to capture a flag, with the first new tribe to three scoring a reward of hot dogs and soda, so you know I would have died to win if I was out there. First up Ben, Croc, Chrissy and Sophie faced off against Mark, Jordan, Mel and Sandra, with the new Water tribe quickly scoring the first point. Josh, Mark, David and Jordie methodically then worked together to tie things up over Croc, Khanh, Jesse and Ben. Sandra, Mel, Shay and Nina worked hard on the third round though were eventually overpowered by Sophie, Sam, KJ and Michelle who scored the second point. Oh and then Ben, Sophie, Croc and Chrissy blitzed through the next round, jagging reward for their tribe. And most importantly, we got to see Ben cheering in his speedo, so everyone is truly a winner.

Back at camp the new Water tribe were delighted to find their hot dog cart, quickly getting to work smashing their snacks and soft drinks. While Sam was thrilled they proved themselves as a new tribe, Chrissy was just thrilled to finally have Croc by her side before talk turned to the fact that Mark was given a choice to join the tribe with Sam and instead opted to keep themselves separated a little longer. Which Sam admitted was a strong strategic decision, despite it hurting. After Croc spoke about feeling bad for those that couldn’t reunite with their pair, Sam and Sophie went for a walk to clear the air and while Sophie promised there were no hard feelings, Sam was very sure that she couldn’t be trusted.

Chrissy interrupted the calm celebrations when she noticed a clue hidden in the side of the cart, quickly rushing to it to snatch it without anyone noticing as she shoved it up her pants. Successfully managing to keep it there, unlike Sharn. Well, until she and Croc awkwardly hugged and she handed it off to him. Back at camp, they went for a walk together where they read their clue and upon Chrissy figuring out where their idol would be, darted off to the river to jag it without anyone noticing. With Croc planning to keep it secret, given that is the advice Sandra gave him and ugh, I now love Croc.

We finally checked in on the new Blood tribe where Jordie was thrilled by how the swap played out for him, keeping him with all of his closest allies and in the majority on the new tribe. And well, to say he was confident is an understatement. Jordie immediately identified Sandra as the biggest threat and vowed to get rid of her ASAP. Essentially. Mark opened up about deciding to stay away from Sam, knowing it was the safest option for them, despite it not being what he truly wanted. As everyone washed off in the water and formed quick bonds, poor Sandra was left alone with Dave back at camp and attempted to try and start over with him, given it is her only option. While she was hopeful Nina’s strong bonds and likability would be able to help her out, she was still very nervous.

Speaking of Nina, she was thrilled to still be on a tribe with all of her allies but sadly – though wisely for her – she approached them to assure them that should they want to vote out her mum, she will be ok with it. While she quietly wondered to us whether she could really bring herself to break her mum’s trust, she also felt it would be hard to cross her allies too.

The tribes reconvened for the immunity challenge where Jonathan explained they would chop through a rope to release a net, climb said net to cross a tower, collect some boxes on balance beams, climb up another tower where they would drop the boxes over the side in an attempt to release a ball. And then use said ball to solve a table maze. Josh got Blood out to the earliest of leads, though they were quickly overtaken by Water who whipped up the nets. After Michelle fell on the balance beams, Blood managed to pull ahead again. Well until they struggled to smash their boxes, giving Water a huge lead while solving their table maze. Sadly, they couldn’t get it together as Nina started to talk her tribe through the puzzle. Though not quickly enough, as Water narrowly took out immunity.

And left Sandra to contend with her Day 16 curse. Much to my mildly simmering rage.

Back at camp Nina quickly apologised for choking while calling the challenge while the rest of the tribe tried to rally and raise her up. Sandra meanwhile stressed about having to go to tribal council on Day 16, though she was hopeful Nina’s connections may be able to keep around for another few days and break said curse. Not wanting to rest on her laurels though, Sandra caught up with Mark and pointed out she has issues with Dave should they be looking for a target, while Dave, Jordie and the cousins hung out to lock in the vote for Mel. Nina went for a walk with Shay and Josh with them filling Nina in on the plan to get rid of Mel, given she is clumsy and may be a liability in future challenges. Which was music to Nina’s, and importantly my ears. 

Sandra meanwhile was back in the water with Jordan, Dave and Amy, with them shocked by the fact Water are willing to get rid of one of their own despite being in the minority. Sadly it was at that moment that Jordie decided they really should have some fun with the vote and instead take out one of the weaker OG Blood women in the form of Sandra, and then at a whisper, Amy.

Jordie, Josh and Mark giddily locked in the vote for Sandra given she is not only weaker and from the rival tribe but most importantly, a massive threat. While Jordie and Josh wanted to give Nina a heads up, Mark assured them it was too dangerous given she could get Shay to play her idol to save her mother and ruin not only their plans but their alliance. Speaking of which, Nina, Sandra and Shay were catching up and well, this better end with an idol play otherwise I’ll be heartbroken. While the trio felt the vote was still going Mel’s way, Sandra worried about what would happen after that given there is nowhere else for her to hide. Even though she isn’t even hiding anymore.

Mark, Jordie and Josh caught up with the other former OG Blood members and Mel to float the Sandra plan and tragically everyone seemed thrilled to jump on board. Thankfully though Nina could tell that Mark and Mel were acting weird with her and as such, felt like something was up. While Jordie caught up with Sandra and assured him the plan was still on Mel, desperate to claim the scalp of Sandra in a blindside.

At tribal council Sandra spoke about being happy with the new tribe, reiterating how proud she is to still be in the game. Mel opened up about being nervous about the upcoming vote, while Mark tried to downplay the fact the original Water tribe hold the majority in this new tribe. Which Jordie reiterated, though far less eloquently. Shay mentioned that she would be voting on strength, given she is desperate for some food and to get another win. This got Sandra fired up, announcing that is not how Survivor works or how it is played, given one person is not a deciding factor in losing a challenge. Sandra then doubled down and pointed out that alliances are more important because come merge, the weak will outnumber the strong and once the strong people start losing immunity, they are immediately booted. Unless they have allies willing to protect them.

This speech spooked Shay, given she thought she knew what would be playing out while Jordie spoke about every season being a clean slate and kinda pretending like Sandra isn’t a damn icon that could wash each and every one of them any day of the week. And well, he better moon us tomorrow if he gets his way tonight because I am growing tired. Nina admitted she is nervous about the upcoming vote, with Jordie pretty much saying he isn’t looking forward to facing a loved one back at camp which narrows down the boot to one of four people, but really only Sandra. Speaking of the Queen, she admitted that she is definitely expecting to receive a couple of votes at tribal council, though continued to speak strongly, reiterating that being a pair is strong and as such, made Josh and Jordan nervous about potentially being the only pair left in the tribe.

Jonathan then asked Nina whether she felt being a pair was important and when Sandra tried to look her in the eye, she told her to look at Jonathan instead as her eyes welled up. This well and truly got Sandra nervous as she spoke about knowing what she signed up for, though she still looked gutted. Before reminding us that the queen stays queen.

With that the tribe voted and tragically, there were no miracles as Shay played her idol for herself – not sure why, though – and Queen Sandra was unanimously booted from the tribe. Once again swap-screwed on Day 16. Which is why I threw the most epic tantrum Charters Towers had ever seen when I got word that Sandra’s curse had completed its hat trick before she claimed her triple crown. 

My tantrum wasn’t pretty, it wasn’t nice and it wasn’t cute, though I would argue it was completely justified.

Sandra is a complete and utter icon and if her new tribes would only stop losing the first challenge after a swap, she should be a lock for the merge after enough time to endear herself with her new people. Instead, we’re left with the brutal tragedy that one again, Sandra is not on a jury at the worst but more ideally addressing one.

While I was heartbroken by her placement on paper, her run on Australian Survivor has only managed to cement her status as the best to ever play the game. Her strategy is simple and logical, but one that not many people could pull off season after season with her finesse.

As soon as I saw her enter the Pre-Jury Villa – no Loser Lodge for MY queen – I immediately started sobbing and ran into her arms. While she wasn’t receptive to my ideas for her to disown Nina and adopt me in her place, or to find Jonathan and production and force them to re-shoot tribal council, or even add a new version of Redemption Rock where Sandra is automatically given the win; she was grateful for my enduring love and support and glad that I was once again by her side on Day 16 to eat our feelings, this time with a Triple Pork, Corndra Cheeaz-Twine. A meal I had tragically thought would manifest the third win, rather than enacting her curse for a third time.

Now I can not take ownership of this recipe – that is Jock Zonfrillo, with some minor tweaks for my preferences – I knew Sandra’s return from retirement needed to be marked with something decadent and regal, worthy of her legacy. This very baconny, very cheesy number is near perfection – smokey and umami, sweet and salty, it is the only glorious meal worthy of someone as glorious as the Survivor GOAT.

Enjoy!

Triple Pork, Corndra Cheeaz-Twine
Jock Zonfrillo’s original recipe
Serves: 8.

Ingredients
50g thinly sliced smoked pancetta
25g smoked salt
25g dark muscovado sugar
10g ground black pepper, to season
10g hot smoked paprika
10g ground star anise
2 tbsp extra virgin olive oil
1.2kg pork belly
1 cup cloudy apple juice
150g sourdough, blitzed to form crumbs
230g sharp aged smoked cheddar, coarsely grated
¼ cup parsley, finely chopped
120g unsalted butter, diced
60g flour
2 ½ cups milk
130g blue cheese, diced
130g Fontina, coarsely grated
130g Talleggio, coarsely grated
salt and white pepper, to taste
400g smoked bacon lardons
1 bunch shallots, thinly sliced
4 garlic cloves, minced
5 sprigs thyme, leaves removed
3 x 400g cans sweetcorn, drained
¼ cup sour cream

Method
Preheat the oven to 200°C.

Start by working on your bacon rub by placing the pancetta on a lined baking sheet and cooking in the oven for fifteen minutes, or until crisp. Transfer to a paper towel to remove grease and allow it to cool. Once chill, combine the pancetta with the smoked salt, muscovado sugar, black pepper, paprika and star anise in a food processor or blender and blitz until crumbed.

Next, score the skin of your pork belly and rub it with oil followed by all but 2 tbsp of the bacon rub, getting it on the meat and skin until it is gorgeously marooned. Pop the pork belly on a rack in a baking dish, skin side up, and pour the apple juice into the dish. Transfer to the oven and cook for 15 minutes, before reducing the heat to 180C and cooking for a further hour. Keeping an eye on the apple juice in the pan and topping up with more, or water, should it run dry. Remove from the oven and leave to rest.

While the pork is getting gorgeously browned, combine the bread crumbs, 100g of the smoked cheddar, parsley and the remaining bacon rub in a bowl until combined.

Next step – FYI, there are a lot of steps and it is what Sandra deserves, so deal – melt half the butter in a large saucepan over medium heat until foamy. Add the flour, whisk and cook for a minute or so. Remove from the heat and slowly whisk in the milk to combine before returning to the heat and bringing to a simmer. Reduce heat to low and cook for a couple of minutes before adding the remaining cheeses and cooking for a further couple of minutes, or until well combined. Season and keep warm.

In another saucepan, melt the remaining butter over medium heat and cook the lardons for five minutes or until starting to caramelise. Add the shallots, garlic and thyme and cook for further five minutes, or until soft and sweet. Add the corn and stir until warmed through.

When the smells have you more than ready to eat, cut the pork belly into a dice, reserving the crackling for a side or to top. Combine the corn and lardon mixture with the cheese sauce, before folding through the pork belly and sour cream.

Transfer to a baking dish, top with the crumb and pop in the oven to cook for 15 minutes, or until golden and crisp. Serve immediately and devour, eating all your feelings away before the next episode.

And remember, the Queen will always stay Queen. Day 16 curse be damned!


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Haylal Snack Peake

Australian Survivor, Australian Survivor: Brains V Brawn, Main, Street Food, TV, TV Recap

Previously on Australian Survivor 24 castaways were dropped in the outback, far from the tropical islands we’ve grown accustomed to – thanks COVID! One by one they were felled as – yep, doing it – Phil, Janelle, Gavin, Benny, Mitch, Joey, Daini, Shannon, Georgia, Rachel and Simon headed home before the two tribes merged and formed the Fire tribe.

Instead of the Beauty tribe, which will always be a sore point to me.

Kez was the first victim of the new tribe before Chelsea was medevaced, leaving Baden to become the King of the Jury. He was quickly joined by Gerald, Laura, Emmett, Andrew, Dani, Wai and Cara, leaving Flick as the lone Brawn standing against George and Cara.

And by standing, I mean hunching painfully in a brutal final immunity challenge where the trio faced off for over five hours before Hayley took out victory and gave her the power to eliminate the final juror. Which obviously became Flick.

After a hard fought final tribal council where both George and Hayley clearly articulated their games, proving just how good they both were, the jury favoured Hayley’s more well rounded approach and awarded her the title of Sole Survivor. And, you know, the half mill.

As you can imagine, Hayley was buzzing as I sidled on to set to congratulate her, pulling me in for a massive hug. You see, Hayley and I are former colleagues and dear friends – you know how painful I can be, which is an asset to a researcher – so I was so excited to be there to share in her win.

Hayley dominated the game and made massive moves throughout the season, and while she was briefly voted out, she used that to her advantage, expertly adapting her play to make it to the end and rightfully take out the game. The only way I could truly do justice to such an epic, entertaining and at times chaotic run was gifting her a triumphant Haylal Snack Peake.

While I was late to the party when it came to the majesty of the HSP, I have well and truly made up for lost time when it came to the holy grail of food. The chips are crispy, the chicken is packing a punch, a little charred and oh so juicy that by the time you get to the garlicky sauce and gooey cheese, there is no denying this is made for winners.

Enjoy!

Haylal Snack Peake
Serves: 4.

Ingredients
1 cup Greek yoghurt
6 garlic cloves, minced
1 tsp ground coriander
2 tsp ground cumin
2 tsp paprika
1 tsp cayenne pepper
2 tsp tsp onion powder
½ tsp black pepper
3 tbsp tomato paste
2 tsp salt
1 lemon, zested and juiced
3 tbsp olive oil
1kg chicken thighs, no skin, no bones (no jokes about me normally loving a bone)
1 batch Jud Beerza Battered Fries
2 cups grated cheddar
¼ cup smokey BBQ sauce
¼ cup garlic sauce
¼ cup sriracha
small handful flat-leaf parsley, roughly chopped

Method
Start by mixing up the yoghurt through olive oil together in a large bowl until well combined. Add the chicken and toss with your hands, making sure that every piece is sopping with the marinade. Cover and pop in the fridge for six hours. Overnight is ideal, but like you, I don’t have time for that so six will do, ok?

Preheat the oven to 220°C.

Grab a bunch of metal skewers and a baking dish that they can precariously balance either side on so they are elevated. I’m not the best at explaining, but it will make sense in a bit. Remove the chicken from the fridge and thread on to two parallel skewers, jamming the thighs close together so they look like baby kebab sticks (I obviously couldn’t be bothered to Google it).

Once they’re all on skewers, line the baking dish and balance the ends of the skewers on the sides of the dish so the chicken is elevated from the base. Pop the dish in the oven and bake for half an hour, or until brown and glorious. Remove from the oven, baste with the juices and return to the oven for twenty minutes. Remove from the oven again when it is charred, baste and leave to rest for five minutes.

While you work on the fries, stand the skewers upright and carve the chicken from them like the do at a kebab shop (side note: how hypnotic was watching that, drunk at 2am?) and leave to rest in their juices.

To assemble, pop your chips in a bowl, top with the cheese and follow with a generous helping of the chicken. Drizzle with the sauces, add a bit more cheese and a sprinkle of parsley to feel healthy.

Then devour like you haven’t had a decent meal in 48 days but are also thrilled to be victorious.


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