Darienne Blakeberry Martini

Drink, RuPaul's Drag Race All Stars, TV, TV Recap

Previously on All Stars, fresh off touring together – and knowing they were massive threats as a runner-up and Ru’s fave, respectively – Kandy and Jimbo vowed to keep each other safe. Along with their fellow tour mate – and another Ru fave – Heidi. That wasn’t necessary yet, however, as The Supermarket Ball saw them all thrive to varying degrees, alongside Alexis and Jessica. On the other hand, it proved to be a struggle for our old gals with MKD proud that can’t sew – she is not Amish and has good credit, after all – and Darienne struggling with the finishing touches. Before taking the runway, Heidi admitted she wasn’t sure if she’d vote on track record, which made Kahanna nervous, given it is what saved her the week before. Ultimately she didn’t have to worry as MKD and Darienne landed in the bottom, Heidi threatened to quit for being safe, while Jessica’s creativity won out and then she beat lip sync assassin Ra’Jah to jag $30k. And tragically eliminate MKD.

Backstage the dolls were exhausted but thrilled to have made it through the ball, while Jessica was gagged to have won more money in the lip sync than the winner of her original season. Jessica admitted that she saved Darienne because she clearly has the fire and that MKD essentially told her she was good to go. The dolls sat down, leading to Darienne counting out the lipsticks with Jaymes and Jimbo admitting to being two of the votes, given they are sticking to voting solely on track record. Jessica meanwhile got iconic, asking if anyone wants to admit they aren’t happy with her win, with Kahanna telling her that she was shocked, though not disappointed. Jaymes spoke about really wanting it but assured her that she was proud of her, with Heidi also talking about not thinking she was going to win but being proud of her nonetheless. And while the congratulations sucked, trust and believe Jessica was fired up to continue slaying and send them home one by one. Like an icon.

The next day Heidi’s energy was back up, ready to jag her first win by smashing a hyman – or heisman, who knows – before the dolls lolled about MKD’s mess of a final dress. After Jimbo tossed her salad at the dolls, Ru dropped by to announce that for this week’s Maxi Challenge they would be writing and filming trailers for new shows. And to assign teams, they’d need to smash balloons with the Pit Crew, so fucking swoon. Lala was topped by Bruno into the green team, Kahanna bottomed for Bryce into green before Kandy took it from Bruno until she landed on the purple team. Darienne haphazardly topped Bryce into the blue, Heidi also bottomed for Bruno into green, Jessica was eiffel towered into purple, Jaymes was choked into blue, Bryce took it from Alexis into blue before Jimbo rounded out purple. Despite not getting face fucked, as per her request.

After everyone tidied up, the groups split up to brainstorm their shows with Alexis, Darienne and Jaymes trying to pick a genre, and while Jaymes has voted for Darienne twice now, she lived for Darienne’s island of fake-dead celebs ala Lost. And while Alexis felt like it was too convoluted to sell in a short time, she trusted her sisters were funny enough to make it work. Kahanna, Lala and Heidi were focused on logic and humour, going with two dumb dumbs trying to kidnap a hottie. Who ultimately escapes because her tucking panties are rank. Jimbo, Jessica and Kandy – aka the winning team – were going with Heathers does Carrie, until Kandy suggested spoofs won’t take out victory given the judges may not think they are creative. And since Jimbo and Kandy argued over who should play the killer – one of them or the Pit Crew – maybe I jinxed them and Heidi is finally going to get her win. Because Jimbo is right in thinking Ru just wants to laugh and doesn’t care about logic.

We followed them straight to set to film with Emmy winner Michelle Visage where Kandy struggled to fake-out with Bryce, Jessica slayed faking a blow job with Bruno before Jimbo tried to pull lippie out of all the holes. And while Michelle was worried they’d get cancelled, I am hopeful this is going to be a hilarious, sexy classic. Lala and Heidi meanwhile were unhinged in all the right ways, which made Kahanna nervous about not being up to their level. Darienne meanwhile was still vibing her concept, Alexis was smutty and Jaymes was surprisingly off and damn, I hope this is a fake out because I am rooting for them to have their breakout moment this week.

Elimination Day arrived with everyone splitting up to work through the key art for their shows, with Team Run Queen Run – Lala, Heidi and Kahanna – quickly locking something before kikiing about how the other teams did. Alexis meanwhile was nervous about their commercial, given Michelle gave them nothing during filming. Kandy and Jimbo meanwhile spoke about the fact the dolls view them as the biggest threats, speculating that if they land in the bottom, they will definitely be going home. They then formed an alliance with Jessica, vowing to protect each other should that happen. They called over Alexis to talk about how her team went with Alexis confident she wasn’t the worst, hinting it is Jaymes and gurl, please leave her alone. Kandy meanwhile checked in with how Heidi was feeling and while I think it was genuine, Heidi returned to being flustered, feeling like Kandy was trying to make her appear weak in front of everyone and paint a target on her back. Heidi then went off, telling Lala that she has tea that was spilled off camera and trust, if and when she reveals it, it will turn besties into enemies real fast.

Ru, Michelle and TS were joined by young Maude Apatow as the Ass The World Turns runway was opened – all the way up – by Jaymes in an iconic Mayan goddess bodysuit with all the curves in all the right places. Darienne gave golden space warrior, Alexis gave bridal badonkadonk – complete with natural cake – Kandy served anime blow-up doll realness, Jessica was glamorous in white – with a kiss on her arse, to boot – Jimbo gave the alien, upmarket version of Kandy’s runway, Heidi zagged serving slutty Eeyore, Kahanna served the journey to her implanted butt before Lala closed the show in a stunning red suit in front with a full arse out, in the back.

When it came to their commercials, Get Off Island was a bit of a mess but still fun, as Darienne played a stunning bimbo. Jessica, Kandy and Jimbo meanwhile were perfect from start to finish, with Jimbo the breakout of Best Friends 4 Never as she turned into a murderous nerd. While group Run Queen Run were fun and camp, though it was mainly due to Heidi and Lala’s accent work. Ru then gagged the dolls announcing that this week would be judged as teams, with Run Queen Run sent to safety before Jaymes received praise for her Marilyn, though was read for their commercial not having any laughs. Though her look was beloved. Darienne was praised for slaying her role and looking the best she’s ever looked, though read for not giving enough jokes. While Alexis was deemed the best on the runway, though their sketch was just pleasant. 

Obviously Alexis immediately threw Darienne under the bus for coming up with the concept as she apologised to the judges. Darienne meanwhile pointed out that everything has been done before, so she felt it was a good concept. Moving on to the other group Kandy received universal praise for her mean girl schtick while the judges lived for the spoof concept, given it gave them room to play. Oh and they loved her outfit. Jessica too was beloved though Michelle cautioned that she needed to add more highlights to her make-up. While Jimbo received all the top marks, given she is a star and was far and away the best actress across all the commercials. Which is why she took out her second victory of the season, while all three of the bottom team were up for elimination. Officially.

Backstage Heidi, Lala and Kahanna were thrilled to be safe, with the latter thrilled that her implants and the runway saved her. The trio spoke about how fun a week they had, putting that down as the reason for succeeding. Kahanna meanwhile thanked her sisters for helping her get the confidence to slay and ugh, I love this for them. Talked turned to Heidi’s moment last week, with her admitting she is grateful to have cleared her head and be able to just have fun. They then started speculating who the tops and bottoms would be, agreeing that the school girls would definitely be winning while one of the islanders would be getting off.

As they spoke about Darienne being an icon, the tops and bottoms joined and immediately confirmed their suspicions on placements. Alexis again spoke about wishing she had mentioned she wasn’t vibing on the concept, with Darienne pointing out she could have thrown out ideas but she didn’t and her calling out Darienne felt like she was excusing herself of any blame. And while I get what Alexis is saying, it wasn’t nice. Good TV, but not nice. Jaymes was first to kiki with Jimbo pointing out she has had a solid run thus far and as such, she feels she should stay and continue her rudemption. And given they were vibing, we can mark her down as definitely safe. Darienne meanwhile agreed with the dolls that while her track record hasn’t been great, she doesn’t really feel like people should focus on track records. Alexis immediately refuted that, saying there should be grace for one stumble and she is here for both herself and her sisters. Despite throwing one under the bus.

Alexis was next to kiki with Jimbo, with Jimbo straight up asking her to identify who should go home with Alexis saying Darienne owned the concept and as such, that would be a reason to go home while Jaymes was also the weakest performance. While Jimbo hilariously wanted to send her out for not having her sisters’ back. Jaymes meanwhile told the dolls that her track record should speak for herself and that she has come a long way. Oh and she will shit in everyone’s station if they kick her out. Darienne meanwhile assured Jimbo that keeping her will be best for her game, and that if she were saved, there will be undying loyalty and werk, Darienne. Let’s hope Jimbo rewards her wanting to play the game, rather than punishes it.

Oh and then Maude dropped by and was so cute and sweet, but that is all. 

With that the dolls voted before Jimbo took her place on stage where she learnt that this lip sync she’d be losing to the OG drama queen, Shannel. As soon as Joan Jett’s Bad Reputation kicked off however, Jimbo looked ready to win her first lip sync as she served rocker in all the right ways. Sadly for her though, so did Shannel. And well, she had a little Vegas showgirl reveal alongside some comedy tricks, complete with broken nails, which was enough to secure her the win, making Jimbo 0 from 5. After she took her place at the back of the stage, Shannel announced that despite a solid week where she wouldn’t have been in the bottom if it wasn’t judged in groups, poor Darienne’s return was cut short. And ugh, I am heartbroken.

As Darienne arrived backstage, I pulled her in for a massive hug as I sobbed, gutted to have lost our old dames back to back. I then apologised for not being a massive fan in Season 6, with Darienne reminding me that isn’t really relevant, though I wanted her to know how drastically my opinion had changed. Darienne – the icon who served your mother darns socks in hell – has always been a polished, talented performer, however this season, it felt like she had less to prove so she was just vibing and having fun. And in turn, I had fun watching her slay – despite what the placements would have you believe – which to me, more than earns her a toast with a Darienne Blakeberry Martini.

Sweet, tart and a little bit sour, this drink has it all. The blackberry, lemon and gin work perfectly to refresh your palate and cleanse the soul, to avoid the socks in hell sitch.

Enjoy!

Darienne Blakeberry Martini
Serves: a lake’s worth, or 4.

Ingredients
2 cups blackberries
¼ cup crème de cassis
1 tbsp raw caster sugar
1 cup gin
2 tbsp Triple Sec
1 tbsp sugar syrup
2 tbsp fresh lemon juice, plus lemon wedges to prep
kosher salt

Method
Blitz the blackberries, creme de cassis and sugar in a blender until smooth and strain into a jug.

Fill a martini shaker with ice, top with the gin, triple sec, lemon juice, sugar syrup and ⅓ cup of the berry puree. Shake like a polaroid picture, which you’re not meant to do, for about 20 seconds, or until well combined.

Rub the rims of the glasses with lemon and press into a little bit of salt – I know, very marg, but I’m a salty gal. Divide the martini amongst the glasses, then down, like the legend you are.


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Kelly Rissoller

Drag Race España, Drag Race España 3, Main, TV, TV Recap

Previously on Drag Race España the dolls threw a little ball, and by little, you know it was a mammoth undertaking which nearly broke all of our sweet icons. Dedicated to los Colores, Sabores and Regiones of Spain. The latter being one that needed to be prepared in the Werk Room, where the dolls would do a modern take on their traditional dress. Poor Chanel lacked cohesion, Kelly lacked polish and Clover was apparently sloppy – Liza Minelli, lies – while Pakita and Pitita slayed each and every category, with the latter ultimately scoring her first win of the season. Thankfully the judges came to their senses when it counted, saving Clover and leaving Kelly and Chanel to lip sync for their safety. With our skating queen slaying her fellow zaddy Chanel, who sashayed away to await a chance to return.

Backstage the dolls toasted Chanel’s run, while Kelly was obviously thrilled to have done enough to save herself and more focused on that. The Macarena was obviously thrilled to be continuing to extend her record, before everyone praised Pitita for dominating the ball. Well, except for Pakita, who just wanted to bring her down next week, given she felt – rightly – she was just as good as Pitita in the ball.

The next day the dolls were already un poco cansado from the competition, but assured each other they were primed and ready to fight. Talk turned to fact they were expecting an acting challenge right about now, which obviously summoned Supremme quicker than you could say Candyman three times. She promptly wheeled out the zaddy Pit Crew – seriously, Espana, thank you – with all the dolls having to pop a balloon against the zaddies bodies to decide on teams for the as yet unconfirmed challenge.

Macarena rimmed her way to team blue, Bestiah but to but her way to yellow, Vania fucked her way to pink, as did Kelly before Pink went crotch to crotch for pink, which is fitting. Pitita fisted to yellow, Pakita got zaddy to bite her balloon on her way to yellow, Hornella got back to fucking – God does want that, after all – on the way to pink before Clover pegged her way to blue. And then Visa pounded over to blue too. Supremme then announced that the three groups would each star in a short horror film with Team Rosa getting El Guarranato, Drag Rec would star team yellow, and blue would perform in Las Otras.

After Supremme and the Pit Crew disappeared the groups split up to work through their scenes with Team Rosa thrilled by theirs, feeling like the parts were almost written for them. So instead they turned their attention to talking smack about their sisters. Despite feeling like Pitita would do a bad job – given she wouldn’t be able to look glam – Pitita and Co were confident in their lines and ready to stay on top. Given the trio currently have the best track records. Macarena, Clover and Visa meanwhile were just vibing, giggling at their script and calmly dividing up the roles.

Team El Guarranato were first to film with Supremme and Paco Plaza where Kelly struggled to find her character. Pink was obviously a camp delight, Vania was a giddy little pig while Hornella played mad scientist to perfection. With an out of control moustache only adding to her performance. Team Las Otras were committed and fun, despite not really performing to the correct cameras. Oh and shout out to Maria Edilla who gave a star turn in a cameo performance. Rounding out filming, Team Drag Rec were hopefully getting the fake out edit as while they got the most direction and rattlesnakes, they appeared to be the most cohesive and funny to me

Dia de eliminacion arrived with everyone ready to throw down, shading each other’s scene while pumping themselves up. Eventually they parked their feuds to go beat their mugs as Kelly told Bestiah about how people have jerked off while watching her perform. Hornella, Pakita and Clover joined the conversation, opening up about how traumatic it is to be blatantly objectified while working and how scared it makes them feel to not even be able to go about their jobs without being made to feel uncomfortable. Visa and Pitita meanwhile were bonding over their families, with Patita gagged by her life, learning that Visa’s abusive father died a month after being in an explosion at home. And how she has tried to work through the trauma of grieving someone she may not have really liked.

Because obviously España is going to give us emotion.

Supremme, Ana y los Javis were joined by Paco Plaza on the judges table as the dolls stomped the Mi Peor Yo runway with Vania serving sexy purple spider queen. Kelly Roller was a black and gold roller girl, Hornella was a locked up glamazon, complete with rose reveal worthy of Sasha Velour while Pink Chadora served messed up Virgin Mary realness. The Macarena gave redemption to her first runway, complete with a snatched wig for the drama. Clover slayed with a stunning afro look which speaks to me on a deep level, given I am a curly icon and feel the ode to styling. Visa was then literally fire as a demon doll before she set herself aflame in honour of her dad’s tragic accident. Pitita meanwhile served full gothic glamour in honour of Max – black and white forever – Bestiah was a demented delight spewing up a bloody head before Pakita closed the show with a gorgeous Barbie look before she removed her wig to serve all the drama.

When it came to the films, El Guarranato was super creepy with all the dolls and clowns in the opening. And while Kelly had herself in hysterics, she wasn’t exactly great. Pink and Vania on the other hand definitely were giving camp silliness at the right level. Though it was Hornella who ultimately ended up stealing the scene, giving passion, drama and comedy in equal measure. Drag Rec meanwhile proved my suspicions correct as the trio of Bestiah, Pitita and Pakita stayed on top, giving us everything and more and making for an actually enjoyable scene. In Drag Race. Which, yeah, is impressive. While Las Otras – the only reference I actually know, tragically – was silly and camp in all the right ways, despite it making absolutely no sense whatsoever.

After the judges praised everyone for doing well, they promptly sent Vania, Hornella, Pink and Bestiah to safety. Kelly was praised for being a delight on set and though read for playing the straight role in the scene as a bit too straight. And for giving a pedestrian look on the runway. The Macarena received wall to wall praise for her performance in the scene and for leaning into her past failures to serve a killer runway. Clover meanwhile was read for slipping in and out of character, though praised for a stunning runway. Visa was praised for the humanity she brought to the runway, despite being lost in the scene. Pitita, obviously, received universal praise for all that he did, from giving AMC’s own Nicole Kidman in the scene and giving a stunning cigar on the runway. And Pakita will make a very deserving runner-up, again, beloved but just a little less than Pitita.

Backstage the safe girls were busy celebrating, none more so than Bestiah who was sure she was going to bomb the challenge. They all agreed that any of the tops could take out the win, though were very concerned about how Kelly would avoid elimination once again. Speaking of the other dolls, volven backstage with Kelly admitting she will totally be in the bottom, but was simply hopeful it wasn’t against Clover who would clearly win. Pakita admitted the win is down to her and Pitita, who was shocked by how much they loved her. Being a humble queen, she praised The Macarena for her star moment, who admitted that it was nice to get praise, finally, after five episodes over two seasons. While Cloved was fired up and oh god, for Kelly’s zaddy sake, I hope it is Visa in the bottom with her instead. Because you know Clover will absolutely demolish.

Ultimately Pitita took out her second win of the season, sending Pakita and The Macarena to safety alongside her. At the other end of the pack, it was Visa that narrowly avoided lip syncing. And as predicted by both myself and Kelly, Clover came to play. As soon as Ay Mama by Rigoberta Bandini began she was right in the pocket. She gave emotion, drama and skin, and despite a sore ankle, used literally every corner of the stage as she fed us. Kelly meanwhile was not to be counted out, proving why she is an absolute legend as she skated her way across the stage once again. Tragically for her, it wasn’t enough as Clover was sent to safety leaving Kelly to roll out of the competition. Well, until a cameo or the return challenge, that is.

As she hot wheeled into the Werk Room, I pulled her in for a massive hug – or as massive as it could be around her broad, strapping shoulders – and assured her that she was robbed. Though I pointed out that out of the dolls eliminated thus far, I feel like she has the best shot of making a triumphant return. Full disclosure though, I was also thinking with my peen. It was enough to cheer her up however, so we quickly pivoted to kikiing and coming up with a gameplay as to how she can win the crown as a returning queen. Aka Chris Underwood-ing it. And while I don’t want to toot my own horn, I feel Kelly Rissoller play a critical role.



Emphasis on toot, given these babies are packed full of beans, filling the rissoles with a delightful earthy flavour that pairs perfectly with the tang of onion and the kick of chilli. Aka, a perfect trinity.

Enjoy!



Kelly Rissoller
Serves: 4-6.

Ingredients
400g can black beans, drained
500g beef mince
5 garlic cloves, minced
2 tbsp hot chilli sauce
½ cup breadcrumbs
1 onion, diced
1 tsp cumin
½ tsp ground coriander seeds
1 egg, whisked
kosher salt and pepper, to taste

Method
Pop the black beans in a bowl and gently mash them so you have a combination of whole and split beans. Add the rest of the ingredients to the bowl and scrunch to combine using your hands. Divide into 12 small patties, place on a lined plate, cover and pop in the fridge to set for half an hour.

When you’re ready to go, pop a skillet over medium heat and once nice and hot, brush with some oil and add the patties – four at a time – and cook for 5 minutes. Flip and cook for a further few minutes, or until nice browned and cooked through.

Serve immediately with salad and salsa, or my fave, mash. Either way, devour.


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Clairunch Wrapsonpreme

Breakfast, Main, Survivor, Survivor 44, TV, TV Recap

Previously on Survivor the medical crew were finally given a break as the three tribes settled into island life. Over at Soka Danny was busy being a sneaky king, finding the key to unlock their cage idol and snatching it without anyone noticing. Carolyn meanwhile secured the Tika idol in a wee more dramatic fashion, first touching a snake before taking the entire bag out and running to hide. After realising she would be the obvious culprit, she ran back to the cage to leave the bag and fake behind, but did so in such a rush that it was clear someone had taken it. Thankfully though she was the only one people didn’t suspect. After they lost immunity, Carson quickly became the swing vote between Helen and Sarah, and Carolyn and Yam Yam. And whether he wanted to be on the right side of history, or just knew Sarah was voteless, he stuck with our fun duo and sent poor Helen out of the game.

Back at camp the tribe came together, pulling Sarah in for a hug and assuring her that booting Helen has nothing to do with her and vowed that they can still be a tight four. Carson meanwhile was thrilled to pull off a blindside at his first tribal council, though didn’t want to be seen as a strategic mastermind of the tribe. He pulled Sarah aside and assured her they can still work together but while she trusts him the most in their tribe, she also knows that makes him the most dangerous person given everyone feels that way about him due to his lovable, nerdy persona. Queen Carolyn on the other hand was just living her best life, glad to have Yam Yam by her side but also to have survived her first tribal council without having to play her idol.

The next day Kane was entertaining Ratu with his pitch perfect rendition of the Canadian national anthem, whether the lyrics were on point or not. Despite being on the bottom of the tribe, he was living his best life, thrilled to have secured the sword at the last immunity challenge given he is a Dungeons & Dragons nerd. Brandon meanwhile was damn hungry, so went to try and catch them some fish. We learnt a little bit about his life beyond being an athlete; flying planes, playing piano and drums, diving and baking, and well, I love him and my basement is well and truly flooded. 

Finally we dropped by Soka where Matt and Frannie were busy planning a lovely road trip after the game while the rest of the tribe bonded over how dangerous they are as a duo. Danny, Heidi, Josh and Claire took it one step further, locking in an alliance, with Danny in particular thrilled to have the target on them, rather than him, given he is the actual biggest threat given he has the hidden immunity idol. He then decided to get a little chaotic, eating the part of the note about the fake hidden immunity idol, wrapping the fake idol with the real note and then locking it in the cage and rehiding the key for either Matt or Frannie to find. And while I love his creativity, if it costs either of my sweet angels, I will riot. Whether I want Danny to choke me with his thighs or not.

We returned to Tika where the tribe were ribbing Yam Yam for his snoring, laughing, giggly and having a good time. While Sarah was having fun she was also acutely aware of the fact she is on the bottom. And given it is unlikely that Tika will win each of the next three immunity challenges, she is worried that beyond a miracle, there is not much she can do to avoid her boot.

We returned to Soka where everyone continued to obsess over finding the key, with Danny growing more and more desperate for people to actually find it and see his plan play out. Sadly his pep talk finally worked as my angel Matt fell straight into his trap and snatched the idol. Danny then used the information, confronting Matt in front of Josh and while Matt pretended he didn’t find anything, he eventually admitted it to Danny, followed by Josh and then Frannie. And while he and Frannie had been the target, Josh now felt finding another one makes more sense. While Danny was just thrilled to have the target off his bag and onto Matt’s instead. All for a fake idol.

Back at Ratu Jaime ate worms and raised morale with her positivity and encouraging nature as Lauren and Kane joined her for a snack. Jaime then continued her good vibes, speaking about how much she is loving being in nature. She and Matthew had formed a tight bond over their passion for the environment and embracing island life, which eventually led to her snatching an idol while hunting for worms. Sadly for her, via flashback, we discovered that Matthew had actually found the idol days ago before making a fake which he had hidden in the well. And while they are tight, should their bond change, he can now use the fake idol to put a target on her back.

The tribes reconvened with Jeffrey for the latest immunity challenge where they would dive into the ocean and push a large cube across the ocean to release keys before digging under a log, unlocking boxes and using them to solve a puzzle. With first place also getting a large toolkit and fruit, second getting a few tools and fruit and third joining Probst at tribal council. Obviously Claire sat out for Soka, joined by Heidi and Lauren before everyone else got to work rolling their cube through the shallows. Ratu started to pull ahead as Tika tragically fell behind. That is until the puzzle happened as everyone tied up before Ratu solved it out of nowhere, before the other tribes went over to cheat, making it a race between Soka and Tika before Yam Yam and Carson took out the win for our faves. 

Back at camp Danny and Josh ventured to the well to discuss their plans, pointing out that Claire has no interest in participating in immunity challenges and as such, they can’t really rely on her to do anything. Danny pulled Claire aside to let her know the target was Matt, before he found Josh, Frannie and Matt to let them know the plan was a unanimous vote against Claire. Frannie meanwhile wanted to work with both Claire and Matt, suggesting to Claire that they instead target Josh given he is way too unpredictable. Frannie admitted she wanted to keep strong with the women, so she and Frannie pulled Matt aside to lock in a Josh vote, though they knew they needed Heidi on board to get it over the line. Which sadly came up as Heidi was busy locking in with the boys. Claire pulled Heidi aside to float the idea, with Heidi admitting she is stuck in the middle before she found Danny and let him know. That duo then caught up with Danny, with them arguing about either keeping strength in Josh or someone they can trust in Claire.

At tribal council Frannie spoke about how the game now feels real, with Josh admitting that the vibe completely changed post challenge. Claire meanwhile scoffed at him, pointing out that the game has been afoot for way longer and Josh needs to stop lying. Frannie agreed that people have been talking for days, though it has been a merry go round and you just need to make sure it doesn’t land on you. Heidi agreed anyone could be a target, while Matt spoke about how he has run through every scenario he could in his head. Claire meanwhile admitted she is super concerned that sitting out of every challenge will come back to bite her, given she felt she was doing what the tribe wanted by sitting out and as such, feels it is rude to now turn it against her. Heidi and Frannie lifted her up, agreeing she was strong to trust the tribe by sitting out when she could have fought to compete even if they didn’t want it, while Matt spoke about the importance of building trust. 

Claire asked Heidi if she could trust her, with her admitting nothing had changed since the afternoon – dun dun, dun – before she spoke about how hard it is to end someone’s dream tonight. With that the tribe voted and tragically the women didn’t stay strong as Claire played her Shot in the Dark but was sadly not saved, leading to her being booted unanimously.

As she arrived at Loser Lodge, I pulled Claire in for a massive hug and thanked her for giving us three iconic episodes. I mean, she is a fourth boot who literally never competed in a challenge, which in itself, is iconic. Add in the fact she used her bench times to create a little chaos and you’ve got a star who is destined to come back in the future robbed goddesses season that me and every other gay has fan cast 100 times over. But while we wait for it to eventuate, I propose you smash a Clairunch Wrapsonpreme and toast her ways.

There are two things I love more than anything in this world – the crunch wrap supreme and creating a breakfast option out of any meal. Enter the brunchwrap supreme! Scrambled eggs, bacon, cheese and shallots folded inside a pocket of tortillas. It is, in a word, heaven.

Enjoy!

Clairunch Wrapsonpreme
Serves: 4.

Ingredients
8 rashers streaky bacon, diced
2 tomatoes, diced
4 shallots, cleaned, trimmed and sliced
8 eggs
salt and pepper, to taste
2 tbsp butter
6 large tortillas
2 cups cheddar cheese, grated
4 Slash Browns, cooked as per his recipe
1 avocado, sliced
vegetable oil

Method
Place a skillet over medium heat and cook the bacon, stirring infrequently, for about five minutes, or until browned and crisp. Add the tomato and shallots and cook for a further couple of minutes, or until reduced and sweet.

Pop another large skillet over medium heat and add the butter. Whisk the eggs together with a good whack of salt and pepper and once the butter is nice and foamy, add the eggs to the pan and scramble by using a spatula and sliding the eggs to either side of the pans once the edges start to ripple and cook, leaving you with delicately cooked ribbons. Remove from the pan.

To assemble, place four of the tortillas on a bench and sprinkle ¼ cup of cheese on the middle of each. Top with a hash brown, some scrambled eggs, avocado, the bacon mixture and the remaining cheese. Split the remaining tortillas and use to top the filling before folding in the edges to create a tight disc. Flip over and leave to settle for five minutes.

Once you’re confident they are closed, place a large frying pan over medium heat and once scorching, reduce to low and brush with vegetable oil. Carefully transfer a brunchwrap, seam side down, to the pan and fry for five minutes or so, or until nice and crunchy. Flip and cook for a further five minutes, or until heated through and the cheese is nice and melted. Repeat the process until done. Then devour, overjoyed by your new favourite breakfast!


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Mimi Ricottang Cookies

Australian Survivor, Australian Survivor: Heroes V Villains, Baking, Dessert, Snack, Sweets, TV, TV Recap

Previously on Australian Survivor George returned from hospital with a brutal facial injury, which instantly endeared him to the tribe that desperately wanted him gone. The tribe christened him and despite the rebirth, Simon and Michael were still out for his now exposed blood. Simon in particular desperate to have the title of Kingslayer on his resume. The Heroes dominated yet another immunity challenge as George bombed the puzzle – justice for Stevie – sending the Villains back to tribal for a second time in a row. Back at camp, the tribe locked in a plan to get rid of George, though Queen Shonee was an icon as she turned the tide and saved our king, sending Michael from the game instead.

The next day the Spice Girls – aka Shiz and George – were busy bonding with Sarah, hoping for answers to whether she actually pushed Miss Greece down the stairs. And while she assured us that she didn’t, I live for the black humour of how she would have wanted to alongside the assurances she was only temporarily in a wheelchair, to get out of anyone thinking she is awful. We then learnt more about the iconic beauty queen, who plays rugby league in her spare time and loves it due to her passion for smashing people. Begging the question, did she actually push Miss Greece?

Stevie meanwhile was doing some tai chi as Jordie and Simon caught up about the fact George is still here, with the boys thankfully moving on and agreeing it was best to use him as a shield. For now. The tribe convened to talk through how they plan to maintain the fire while away at the upcoming challenge, while Stevie adorably tried to keep them all focused and motivated before pulling them into some tai chi. And while he isn’t great strategically, Shonee lives for his kooky ways despite him wanting her gone. And what is good for Shonee is good for me.

Jonathan made a speedy return for the reward challenge where the Heroes were gagged to see George survive, rather than the fact it was Michael that departed. For the challenge, the tribes would face off one on one to grab a sandbag in the water and score a goal, with the first tribe to three getting a giant cookie jar. More importantly, this kind of challenge generally gets us buns as the boys grapple in the water. First up were Shonee and Flick with our Queen putting in one hell of a fight before Flick scored the first point for the Heroes. Stevie once again faced off against Shaun who obviously won before Jordie scored the first point for the Villains against Matt. Sam and Simon were up – the latter in speedos, swoon – with Simon tying things up after a brutal, brutal battle. That left Mimi and Paige to battle for the win which started off a bit derpy before the duo fought hard, dragging each other back and forth before Mimi secured the cookies for the Villains. Like a damn boss.

We finally checked in with the dejected Heroes trip with Shaun sad to have missed out on the cookies, while Rogue gave them a pep talk which obviously sounded more like reprimanding them for not being strategic enough. Everyone started to speculate whether a clue would be in the cookies and how ultimately it would make the Villains more chaotic and as such, could help them in the long run. Shaun, David, Matt and Sam caught up in the water to form an alpha male alliance with Benjamin pointing out to the girls what was happening, while Ben narrated an ad for all the meat on offer and yes producers, thank you, thank you, thank you!

While Rogue was busy questioning who, other than her, was actually a hero.

Back over with the funner Villains, the tribe instantly cracked the cookies and got to work smashing them before Jordie suggested they sit by the shore to continue eating them. George meanwhile went to crack a coconut – which was obviously code for idol hunting – as the tribe were otherwise occupied. Sadly for him, it wasn’t the perfect cover as Jordie questioned where he was as everyone praised his strategy in the challenge. And while he did find the idol, it may no longer be a total secret as there is suspicion. And a giant bulge in his pocket. 

That being said, it appeared that nobody had actually noticed George’s antics, as the tribe seductively ate cookie after cookie before everyone started to speculate whether they should search the jar for a clue or advantage. Despite the risk of literally getting their hand caught in the cookie jar. While Jordie cautioned Fraser against it unless he was feeling nervous, Fraser tried the same with Mimi who was less concerned about the repercussions. After night fell, she quietly got out of bed and started searching through the jar – unsuccessfully – as Liz awoke and just as quietly watched on behind her. The next day Mimi was disappointed to have not found anything while Liz got to work spreading the update to everyone in the tribe.

And just like that, Mimi was now public enemy number one.

The tribe rejoined JLP for the latest immunity challenge where the tribes would have to race a ladder over a series of obstacles before releasing a sack of coconuts and then using said coconuts to smash six tiles. The Villains got out to an early lead on the first obstacle before the Heroes’ brute strength slowly closed the gap. And then they pulled way out in front. To the point where they smashed all of their tiles before the Villains even released theirs.

Back at camp the tribe were, how do you say, very disappointed, with Stevie questioning what the hell they are doing wrong. He caught up with Simon and Jordie to suggest they focus on getting rid of dysfunction by taking out Mimi. Which the boys were obviously on board with, particularly since they know he would be loyal to them if they protect him. The Shiz too were focusing on Mimi or Stevie, with Shonee rightly pointing out that since Stevie is coming for her, it makes sense for her to get rid of him. The boys joined the girls, Sarah and George, quickly pushing them back towards getting rid of Mimi for her shiftiness.

Well, for a little bit.

George obviously hates not being in control, so approached Mimi to fill her in on what has been happening and told her to go hunting for an idol while he worked overtime on turning the tide on Stevie. He and Fraser joined up with Shiz and quickly locked them in on the Stevie plan, before they floated the plan to Sarah. Everyone eventually reconvened at the shelter where Simon stumbled upon the advantage that was hidden in the cookie jar. Wait, no, the producers crossed out the idol symbol so I am just guessing it is a random token with zero power. Or if he is lucky, an idol nullifier. Simon caught up with Jordie, filling him in on the potential idol before floating the idea of idoling George instead. And damn, things just got spicy or funny. And there will be no in between. Begging the question, do the producers have a fetish for making Simon look silly? Because if so, the idol is for real fake.

Simon got to work making sure everyone was voting for Stevie, laying it on thick with George to ensure he thought they were tight and as such make the blindside all the more sweet. Mimi meanwhile caught up with Shonee to see if they were good, with the Queen assuring her that duh, of course they were. Stevie traded out with Shonee, suggesting Mimi goes idol hunting while both of them pretended they didn’t know the other was a target. Simon and Jordie caught up with Shonee, not letting her in on the plan before she reiterated that while she doesn’t trust George, she knows she needs him for now to save herself. And after she left, Jordie rightly pointed out that they can’t afford to make a move without at least checking in with Shiz, because otherwise, they will flip on the boys and they will follow him out the door.

At tribal council Fraser tried to downplay the fact they are slowly growing more and more screwed, as the tribe snacked on cookies. Liz spoke about being sick of tribal council but knew it was the game and as such, was ready to get on with it. Simon started to whisper to Jordie about wanting to make history, before Jordie told Jonathan that he is more focused on quality over quantity and while he wants numbers, he’d like to make sure they are loyal. Simon reiterated the fact they have won a couple of challenges and as such, they at least know they can beat the Heroes, with George agreeing that the last win in particular was arguably the best he has had in both seasons.

Talk turned to the paranoia of the cookie jar with Jordie outing someone for hunting in it for an advantage. Though stopped short of naming Mimi, despite everyone already knowing about it. Liz hilariously then admitted that she knows who it is given she was the one who saw them, before Simon and Jordie started whispering again as Jordie desperately asked him to reconsider. And when he didn’t listen, he instead asked to talk to the girls who swiftly told him they would not be on board. At all. Despite the whispering, Stevie was not concerned and assured Jonathan that if they wanted him to know what they were talking about, they would tell him. He and Mimi then argued over whether he was loyal or had trust, and while they fired up, it made Shonee and Liz keen to flip things back on to her instead of Stevie.

After Shiz got the boys on the new page, Simon decided it was a good idea to now play his non-idol for Mimi while Jordie openly declared that tonight is not the night for big moves and that instead, they needed to focus on building trust with the people they want to work with. Aka Simon, cool your jets, you can get idol redemption another day. Well, if it is legit, that is. The tribe finally voted and Simon wisely opted against any theatrics as Mimi was brutally blindsided from the game, meaning Shonee has now booted and saved Stevie. Like a merciful queen.

As Mimi pulled up at Loser Lodge, I quickly ran out to give her a massive hug, disappointed to see yet another queen exit the game too soon. I assured her that despite the stumble with the cookie jar, she had been playing a solid game and should be proud of how she always stayed true to herself. Plus, she totally dominated the reward challenge. With the formal pep talk out of the way, we gossiped about whether we thought the Villains were doomed for a Stephanie LaGrossa V Bobby Jon demise, or whether they’d be able to win immunity soon. But that goss is not something I’m willing to share just yet. Just the secret to some delicious Mimi Ricottang Cookies.

Yes, yes, it is another festive recipe, but you’ll have to accept that the show filmed last year and festive cheer commences in July in my house. Plus, you don’t necessarily need the sprinkles to make these ones a winner. Soft and melt in your mouth, the light flavour transports you to a place of calm.

Enjoy!

Mimi Ricottang Cookies
Serves: 12.

Ingredients
240g unsalted butter, softened
425g raw caster sugar
1 ¾ cups ricotta cheese
1 lemon, zested and juiced
1 tbsp vanilla extract
2 eggs
480g flour
2 tsp baking soda
1 tsp kosher salt
450g icing sugar
¼ – ½ cup milk, depending on desired consistency

Method
In a stand mixer, cream all but a tablespoon of the butter and caster sugar on medium speed until light and fluffy. Add the ricotta, lemon zest and half the vanilla, and return to medium speed to beat until well combined. One by one, beat in the eggs, allowing the mixture to come back together between them. Scrape down the sides of the bowl before folding in flour, baking soda and salt. Return to the mixer one last time and beat until everything is just combined. Cover the dough and pop in the fridge to chill for a couple of hours.

Preheat the oven to 180C and line a few baking sheets.

When the dough is cold and firm, shape into tablespoon sized balls and place on the baking sheets leaving about 5cm between them to allow for spread. Pop the trays in the oven and bake for 15 minutes or until lightly baked, just before golden, before allowing to cool for five minutes on the tray after which they should be stabilised to cool completely on a wire rack.

While the cookies cool, melt the remaining butter. Sieve the icing sugar into a large bowl before slowly whisking in the melted butter, lemon juice, remaining vanilla and enough milk to form a glaze. That will depend on your own preferences.

Pour a little bit of glaze on top of each cookie, followed by the sprinkle of your choice – don’t have to be festive, but why not, I say – before smashing. Gleefully.


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Rumethyst Custard

Dessert, RuPaul's Drag Race, RuPaul's Drag Race 15, Snack, Sweets, TV, TV Recap, Vegetarian

Previously on RuPaul’s Drag Race despite (my former friend) Todrick’s show eating into half the runtime, Ru and Co. served up a double dose of Snatch. Not like in All Winners, where they had to do two characters but just splitting the dolls in two given it was so damn early. Despite two groups of queens, it was Loosey that somehow managed to own both of them with a hilarious, pitch perfect Joan Rivers. Meanwhile Sugar and Spice malfunctioned, Aura was planned and Amethyst was a delight as Tanning Mom. Obviously that meant Loosey won, while the producers pulled the trigger on the Sugar and Spice lip sync, with sweet Sugar tragically felled by her twin.

Backstage Spice was well and truly heartbroken to have lost her sister, though to their credit, her new sisters rallied around her and made sure she knew that while she was now alone, she has them as a support system and a family and ugh, why am I crying. After taking a seat, Loosey was feeling her oats and got things shady pointing out Mistress clearly took out second place, which led to the drama between her and Marcia flaring up. They pivoted to getting out of drag with Spice frustrated that some girls were still there over Sugar and while Mistress tried to get her to spill, her lips were sealed.

The next day Spice was feeling a little better until Aura asked her to share who out of the safe queens she felt should have been in the bottom with her. Which obviously was stopped by Mama Ru’s arrival, who dropped by to open the library for the speedy version of the reading challenge. Given you essentially only got one gag from each doll it appeared everyone did well, with Luxx aggressively calling out Marcia’s looks while Mistress was brutal, Spice was cute, Sasha once again proved she is hilarious and Loosey continued to shine. I mean, she joked about MH17, shooting her sisters and well, it was only right she won. Again.

Before departing Ru announced that for this week’s Maxi Challenge the dolls would form a trio of fashion houses – House of Kressley, House of Mathews and House of Visage – using homewares inspired by their leader. Oh and while it is individual, the dolls needed to create a cohesive collection. Team Mathews was made up of Malaysia, Loosey, Sasha and Marcia x 3, Team Kressley was made up of Anetra, Salina, Jax and Robin while Team Visage was Luxx, Mistress, Spice, Amethyst and Aura. After ransacking the warehouse, the dolls split up to talk through their collections, with Luxx quickly taking control while Spice was delightfully confused, making Mistress love her even more. Team Kressley were going for Willow Smith does Heathers while Team Mathews were going with palm trees. And Malaysia was just going to pretend she can sew until she gets it together.

Ru dropped by to kiki with the dolls with House of Kressley filling her with confidence given they can all sew and have a very clear plan. Oh and thankfully Ru called out Salina’s crunchy style and well, I love it. And her. When it came to House of Visage, Amethyst was relying on hot glue and a prayer, though Ru wasn’t living for their cohesive element being royalty. And that is it.

After Ru departed for the second time the dolls split up to work through their outfits with Team Visage moving away from the royalty prompt, disappointing Luxx who had an entire Marie Antoinette moment planned out. Though she eventually was keen to make pants, so there is that. Jax meanwhile was desperate to find out who Spice thought should have been in the bottom the week before and while she brushed it off, Mistress wished her new daughter would have relished the moment to be shady. Amethyst meanwhile was just busy spiralling as she got more and more confused and felt like she had no plan.

Elimination Day arrived with Jax opening up about being the only person of colour at school and how she struggled with the casual racism that comes along with it. Though she was grateful to move to NYC and see that the world could be so much more and finally be able to come into her own. Luxx and Spice meanwhile bonded over fashion and dolls, which was cute, sweet and I love them.

Ru, Michelle and Ross were joined by THE Janelle Monae as Drag Race Fashion Week commenced. Mistress opened the House of Visage runways giving sexy Jersey ball glam, Aura gave sexy CEO Tarzan, Amethyst was old Hollywood though make it unfinished, Spice gave Baby Michelle at the VMAs while Luxx was stun-ning giving African glamour, complete with cape. Robin kicked off the House of Kressley giving an architectural school girl look, Jax looked like a gothic Harley Quinn, Anetra was stunning in a sexy business bikini while Salina served drama in a very Salina look. Closing out the show were House of Mathews, where Sasha gave sexy JLo resort wear, Loosey gave Brady beach chic, Malaysia gave Southern Belle at the beach before Marcia closed the show looking like a sweet ‘60s schoolgirl.

Mistress, Aura, Spice, Anetra, Loosey and Marcia were sent to safety before the judges praised Amethyst for upping her make-up skills, though read her for such a messy look. Luxx received wall to wall praise for everything she served from the energy to the impeccable workmanship and boy did she know it. Robin was praised for giving punk in her look, Jax was read for not telling a story, Salina was read for being Salina before Sasha took us back into the positive realm for just being a smart, talented icon. And Mistress was praised for bringing the regal and tricking them into believing she could sew.

Backstage the safe dolls were thrilled to be backstage rather than being read for filth by the judges. Speaking of which, they praised Loosey for killing the reading challenge. Spice directed talk to Amethyst’s look and general lack of sewing skills in general before Mistress checked in with Spice, who opened up about how she still looks around the Werk Room looking for her sister, though was ready to stand on her own two feet. Talk turned to family with Marcia opening up about being a twin, while Anetra shared that she doesn’t talk to her family and how she misses seeing her siblings. While Mistress assured her that she is in the same position and well, it is their loss, not theirs. The latter their being Mistress and Anetra’s.

The tops and bottoms joined the frackass with Malaysia thrilled to be in the top alongside the other dolls, while Luxx was well and truly feeling her oats. Jax was a little confused given her reviews were mixed, which clearly left Salina and Amethyst as the bottoms. With the former being positively heartbroken about it. While Spice assured Amethyst that despite the critiques, she looks beautiful. While the dolls reminded her she killed Snatch Game and well, that should count for something. As the dolls kiki, Salina quietly sobbed until Sasha pulled her aside to give her a pep talk and ugh, mother is mothering and if she doesn’t win, I will riot.

Janelle then gagged the divas with a visit and well, she is an icon and I look forward to her EGOTing in the next five years because there is nothing she can not do. Including pep talks.

Ultimately Luxx took out victory as Malaysia, Sasha and Robin were sent to safety while Jax narrowly scraped through, leaving Salina to face off against Amethyst to survive. And when she said she was going to fight to stay in the competition, she meant it. As soon as Janelle’s Q.U.E.E.N. kicked off she was right in the pocket, hitting every lyric and giving all the right vibes. Amethyst gave another solid performance, but sadly for her, Salina just had it down and as such, she found her run of luck running out as she exited the competition. On the third strike, just as Spice predicted.

While Amethyst was disappointed to be out of the competition, I tried to remind her that being a bright spark in Snatch Game is what people will remember her for. Which seemed to pull her out of any funk. Sadly it wasn’t enough to get all the deets on her former romance with Robin, so I eventually stopped pushing for intel and instead toasted her killer performance with a big, boozy bowl of Rumethyst Custard.

While brandy custard is the usual festive direction people take their custard in, I find rum is an even more glorious way to take it. Though maybe that is because like Bowen Yang, I am from Queensland. Smooth with a big ol’ kick, it is a delight. Just like Amethyst.

Enjoy!

Rumethyst Custard
Serves: 8.

Ingredients
200ml double cream
700ml milk
4 egg yolks
3 tbsp cornflour
100g raw caster sugar
1 tbsp rum
¼ tsp salt
pinch of fresh grated nutmeg, to garnish

Method
Combine the cream and milk in a large saucepan and gently bring to a near boil. While that is on, whisk the yolks, cornflour, sugar, rum and salt in a large bowl. When the milk and cream is hot, slowly whisk into the eggs until combined.

Clean out the saucepan and wipe dry before transferring the mixture back. Cook over low heat, stirring constantly until the custard is thick. Strain into a bowl, cover and chill for a couple of hours.

Or devour warm. TBH, both ways are delicious with a sprinkle of freshly grated nutmeg.


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Peri Peri Chicken Yirocesis Couture

Canada's Drag Race: Canada vs the World, Canada's Drag Race: Canada vs the World 1, Main, Snack, Street Food, TV, TV Recap

Previously on Canada’s Drag Race vs the World the dolls recovered from Snatch Game by being immediately thrown into another large, epic challenge – the ball! This time focused on weather, since you know, Canada. Despite the group having a range of experiences with design challenges – from ball winners, to design challenge winner to ball loser, to queens sent home by designs and Ra’Jah, who is literally the best seamstress to ever grace the mainstage – they all managed to pull together decent looks. Victoria debuted a Drag King look in honour of Fabio – swoon – Silky was perfection from start to finish, while Icesis was super polished. At the other end of the pack, Anita didn’t heed Silky’s advice that less is more, landing in the bottom opposite Rita. And was tragically eliminated – farewell, Down Under – after Silky took out victory over Victoria.

Backstage Rita was glad to still have a place in the competition, though was disappointed it came at the cost of her bestie. Silky and Ra’Jah praised Anita for bringing such joyous energy to the competition, before Silky took it one step further and crowned her Miss Congeniality and offered to transfer her $500 Canadian dollars as the prize. As the survivors sat down to kiki, Ra’Jah praised her sister for getting redemption on the design challenge and Victoria for becoming an absolute icon. Rita opened up about how emotional she is to have survived, with both Silky and Victoria – who also picked Anita’s lip stick – assuring her that they made the right decision as Anita was ready to go. Oh and now that everyone has had a turn in the top, they’re all unsure whether it is time to start playing games.

Oh and Vanity somehow found a coffee enema or something and well, I need to have one based on her and Ru’s reactions.

The next day Icesis and Ra’Jah admitted they were a little shocked that one of them wasn’t in the top along with Victoria and Silky, which TBH, same. While Rita still just wanted to burn her outfit. Before she could get any matches out, Brad arrived to task the girls with a quick drag Cameo Mini Challenge. And well, Silky was Silky, Ra’Jah was a delight, Vanity came through with legit tips and Rita was horny. Icesis meanwhile couldn’t remember the national album and well Victoria was fired up and stunning. But well, it was Ra’Jah who grew more ridiculous with each round, which proved enough to give her the win.

Before departing Brad announced that for their Maxi Challenge the dolls would be putting on a little comedy show, with he and husband Gary Janetti dropping by to help them work through their sets. Oh and since Ra’Jah took out victory in the mini challenge, she would obviously have the power to decide the order of the show. They sat down to kiki with everyone offering themselves up as the first performer, while Victoria was desperate to go in last place and Icesis was happy to just go wherever. To keep things fair, Ra’Jah popped herself in first place, followed by Vanity, Rita, Icesis, Victoria and then Silky. Which obviously irked Victoria, given she was the only one to request it. 

With that decided, the dolls split up to work through their sets with Victoria questioning why she wasn’t put in last place to Rita. Speculating that Ra’Jah was looking out for her sister and trying to sabotage her in the process. Silky meanwhile was nervous to be doing her first comedy challenge across her three seasons, though was ready to show how damn funny she is. Ra’Jah meanwhile was terrified about writing jokes while Icesis was hoping to knock it out of the park once again and to get the chance to gloat about being the only winner.

Ra’Jah was first to meet the Goreski Janettis, laughing about how she wasn’t her mothers favourite child despite being her only one. And well, Ra’Jah was now very VERY nervous. Vanity opened up about hating public speaking, though was surprisingly brutal and charming with her jokes. Rita meanwhile was super confident given comedy is her bread and butter, leaning into bits and vowing to get naked if she wasn’t funny. Icesis was energetic and cute, but seemed to be stuck in her head while Victoria was ready to be as crude as humanly possible and well, I love it. There are cervixes, spunk and wet-wiped junk and this better not end up being a bomb. Oh and then Silky sauntered on stage and was a charming delight, talking a mile a minute and delighting everyone.

Elimination Day arrived and while Victoria and Vanity were bonding over their gameplans while beating their mugs, Icesis returned to the Werk Room and looked to be holding back tears. Silky checked in on her with Icesis not really wanting to talk, before Ra’Jah pulled her aside to see if she was ok. Icesis broke down in tears as she opened up about being absolutely exhausted and how she feels like she returned to the competition way too soon and honestly needs a break. As such, Ra’Jah and Rita assured her she will be fine if she needs to go and look after herself, reminding her that she owes nothing to anyone but herself and her health. Silky joined them and pulled her in for a hug as Icesis announced that she needs to leave the competition, as all her sisters rallied around and held her tight. And ugh, I am sobbing.

As soon as Icesis exited the Werk Room I pulled her in for a massive hug and assured her that she made the right decision. While she was perfect and delightful over the course of a second season, she has nothing to prove to anyone – I mean, she already won before – but even if she did, she did that. She oozes warmth and charm, has more talent in her pinky toe than I could ever dream of and well, we are lucky to experience any amount of time she can give us. As such, I gave her one final hug and assurance she did the right thing, while sending her on her way with a warm, comforting Peri Peri Chicken Yirocesis Couture.

Yiros are one of my favourite street foods because, duh, chips are an integral part of the equation. Add in some gloriously hot peri peri chicken and you’re in heaven. Fluffy potato, creamy sauce and the burn of charred meat? Per. Fec. Tion. Just like Icesis.

Enjoy!

Peri Peri Chicken Yirocesis Couture
Serves: 4.

Ingredients
6 small bird’s eye chillies, seeds in or out depending on how you like the heat
½ tsp chipotle chilli powder
4 cloves garlic
1 lime, zested and juiced
2 tbsp paprika
2 tbsp oregano
¼ cup olive oil
¼ cup champagne vinegar
600g chicken breast, thinly sliced
1 batch Jud Beerza Battered Fries
4 Pita Andre Breads
⅔ cup Coolaioli
2 tomatoes, sliced
½ cup cheddar cheese, grated

Method
Blitz the chillies, chilli powder, garlic, lime juice and zest, paprika, oregano, olive oil and champagne vinegar in a food processor to form a paste. Transfer to large bowl with the chicken, toss to coat, cover and pop in the fridge to marinate for a good hour or two.

When you’re ready to go, cook the chips as per Jud’s recipe and pop a skillet over medium heat. Add the chicken and all the fiery juices and cook stirring for about five minutes or until they are starting to caramelise, depending on how thinly you sliced your chicken.

To assemble, heat the pitas in a dry pan – if not freshly cooked, obvi – and smear each with some aioli. Top with the tomato, cheese, chicken and then chips before rolling to enclose. Serve with some extra chips and then devour, gloriously.


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Lemon & Sminty Drop

Drink, RuPaul's Drag Race UK, RuPaul's Drag Race UK 4, TV, TV Recap

Previously on Drag Race UK the dolls were paired up to make complimentary looks ready for the bingo hall out of a box of colour-themed goodies. While Sminty and Le Fil panicked about their options, they ultimately slayed – obviously – while Jonbers and Peppa went the opposite route, living for their options and concept though ultimately unable to execute their vision in time. Oh and while I felt Cheddar and Copper looked perfect as good vs evil, though Cheddar looked like a snazzy rock while Copper gave Barbarella realness. Dakota and Baby though were the clear standouts and took out the win, while Peppa and Copper were singled out as the worst of their pairs and forced to face off in the lip sync. Tragically sending Copper out of the competition.

Backstage Peppa was feeling humbled by her appearance in the bottom before she followed it up by praising her dear sister Ginger. And by Ginger, she was talking about Copper. Sminty meanwhile could get her name right, though was feeling awks to have called her an old maiden, particularly since she was heartbroken to have lost her warm presence. Cheddar felt badly to have not been in the bottom with her partner, while Danny questioned if Jonbers was just grateful that Peppa had to lip sync from their pair, essentially saying that she thinks Jonbers got bloody lucky.

Things were far more chill the next day as Dakota proudly unveiled her second badge leading to shady little Sminty questioning whether it means she is no longer Da-coaster. Before Baby could unleash on her sisters for ruining her first win in the Girl Groups challenge again, Ru arrived to lead the girls in a booty-tastic quick-drag game of Musical Chairs. Zaddy Brit Crew was brought out to adjudicate as the dolls twerked their way around the booty chairs until Danny exited first. Just as she predicted. She was followed by Cheddar, Dakota, Le Fil, Baby, Peppa and Jonbers before Pixie took out the win over Sminty. Which seemed right, given they both had cheeto dust on as foundation.

And for her troubles, she would be picking teams for this week’s Maxi Challenge where the dolls would appear in the new UK chat show Catty Man. So basically, Bossy Rossy, but hopefully with funny improv? Pixie is smart, so obviously she grabbed Cheddar and Danny, then assigned Dakota, Le Fil and Baby to Group 2 leaving Peppa, Jonbers and Sminty as the last group. After Ru departed the groups split up, de-dragged and kikied about how the groups were formed with Group 2 thinking it was all kind and fair. While Pixie admitted to her co-stars that she put the final group together knowing it is likely to bomb. Badly. They took their places around the werk room to read the overview of the scenes, with Group 1 getting a great psychic, attempted murder narrative. Group 2 would be dealing with a case of swapped tonges while Group 3 aka Group Pixie-designed-to-bomb would be confronting a catfish.

We ventured straight to set where Cheddar, Pixie and Danny were first to chat with Catty Man himself and my dear friend, Alan Carr. And well, they were perfection from start to finish. Cheddar was a camp, heartbroken, vamp, Danny was the most ridiculous psychic and having the most damn fun. And by the time Pixie arrived, pitch perfect, I don’t see how any of the other teams could top them. Insert a because they’re all bottoms joke here yourselves, please. Dakota’s fake voice was madness and had everyone, herself and Alan included, in hysterics. Baby was hilarious and charming, though more importantly, was sitting spread eagle on the chair while Le Fil was a doddering, doctor, delight. Rounding out taping, Peppa was ready to run out and get married; sweet, loved up and oh so cute, Sminty meanwhile got a bit swallowed up by the scene. Particularly once Jonbers arrived, giving sexy, stupid and so much fun. While Sminty just stayed on stage until the lights went out. Shocked and confused.

Elimination Day arrived with Sminty clearly having exited the Catty Man set and joining her sisters to prep for the runway, while Pixie and Danny spoke about who they think will win a badge out of the two of them or whether it would be a group win. Because yeah, they felt what we saw, I guess? Le Fil and Dakota meanwhile were talking about how excited they were for the runway. Dakota opened up about how important her hair was to her growing up and how nice it will be for her to pay homage to her grandmother who let her embrace her desire for long, billowing locks. Le Fil too felt like hair was so important to her, given being male is so important in her culture and that growing out her hair as an adult feels like coming into her own. Peppa meanwhile spoke to Cheddar about how she would proudly honour her blackness with braided hair, while Cheddar opened up about losing her hair after getting sick as a teen and while it led to a lot of insecurities, shaving it all off made her fully come into her own.

Ru, Michelle and Alan were joined by Alison Hammond as Danny kicked off The Mane Event runway looking mad as she walked the dog with her shock of red hair. But given she called her dog, Divina Dog Campo – the red dog with a silver leash, it’s a win for me. Cheddar slayed as the sexiest Cheshire Cat known to man, complete with a rainbow furball. Pixie gave the Birth of Venus and looked oh so glamorous, Dakota was stunning as she honoured her grandmother’s hair-doll curtains she destroyed growing up, Baby was sexy in an architectural gown made of dreads before Le Fil was stunning, giving all the hair we’ve collectively lost down the drain. Black Peppa was stunning in a gorgeous braided regal gown, Sminty was perfection as a sexy-moth while Jonbers was gorgeously camp as Lady Di’s step mother, though make it furkini sexy.

Dakota, Peppa and Jonbers were sent to safety before Cheddar received universal praise for the challenge and even more for the runway. Danny’s performance in the challenge was completely beloved as was her bringing glam on the runway. And well, Pixie too received top marks for all that she did this week. Because honestly, any of the three could win this. Baby meanwhile was read for letting her nerves get to her and serving only one note, though obviously they all lived for her runway despite Ru wanting it to be elevated. They felt Le Fil was a little bit flat and gave the much needed shade to the challenge (though no personal light), though they loved her filthy concept on the runway. Then poor Sminty was read for just disappearing in the challenge but damn were they in love with her runway, Mothy Kendoll, in honour of her mother.

Backstage Dakota was so grateful to be safe despite being nervous about the challenge, while Jonbers wished she was able to have been in the top. As the tops and bottoms joined the girls, Danny broke down about how much it meant to her for Ru to call her a comedy legend who was perfect. Pixie broke down about how much the judges loved her look, while Cheddar praised Pixie for doing so well in the challenge, before loading praise on Danny, which made her a little sad. Talk turned to the bottom with everyone speculating whether the fact that Sminty’s runway being the best of the night would be enough to save her from being the absolute worst in the challenge. While Baby opened about struggling with her emotions throughout the competition, though both she and Sminty vowed to give it their all in the lip sync.

Ultimately Cheddar was deemed safe before Danny took out victory – much to Pixie’s clear disappointment, despite the pride for her sister – before Pixie joined them. At the other end of the pack, Le Fil narrowly avoided lip syncing, leaving Baby and Sminty to battle it out to Mel and Kim’s Respectable, with both of the dolls absolutely slaying, giving camp, comedy and hitting every damn line. But damn, let’s just say that Baby’s attitude was unbeatable, giving all the sass before straight up stripping down to a thong. And well, like me, that was enough for Ru to give her the win, tragically eliminating Sminty from the competition.

Thankfully in the most iconic way possible, sad twerking at the door on the way out.

By the time she arrived backstage, I had fully converted myself into an old timey mobster-talent agent-esque character, telling her, “kid, you did GREAT! That exit just secured your career and made you a STAR baby.” While I quickly came back into my own, Sminty’s willingness to make fun of herself and give us a Vanjie style moment made an already delightful run completely iconic. Which is all I needed to justify toasting her success with a fresh, punchy Lemon & Sminty Drop.

This delight is actually Lady Sonja Tremont Morgan’s signature drink, but TBH, I feel like she and Sminty would be the best of friends so I am sure she is happy to share. Sharp, tart and earthy, this refreshing little drop is both celebratory and refreshing. Like the new legend, Sminty.

Enjoy!

Lemon & Sminty Drop
Makes: 1.

Ingredients
½ lemon
1 sprig mint
ice
1-2 shots blue raspberry vodka
soda water

Method
Squeeze a quarter of the lemon into a tall glass and muddle with the mint.

Fill the glass with ice, pour in the vodka and top with soda water and the remaining lemon to garish. Then, down.


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Lindsay Carmiener Pretzel

Main, Snack, Street Food, Survivor, Survivor 43, Tapas, TV, TV Recap

Previously on Survivor, Gabler continued to struggle with the conditions on the island, leading the girls to continue to plot around his idol. Sadly for them, Sami wanted to be the one to talk to him and when told no, he promptly outed all their plans to Gabler. Karla meanwhile found the Beware Advantage and despite initially leaving it, circled back and bamboozled everyone into giving her the beads and jagged herself an idol. After losing another immunity challenge, Vesi decided it was time to start focusing on strength and despite Noelle being on the outs, they banded together to boot Nneka from the game.

Back at camp Noelle quickly rallied everyone around to thank them for saving her, while the tribe assured her that they believe in her and know that things are about to turn around. Despite Cody feeling like they are running dead last. We pivoted to Baka in the early hours of the morning where Gabler was trying to help his tribe out by putting palm frond blankets on them to stay warm but, sadly, only ended up pissing everyone off. And well, that lack of self-awareness kinda had him running dead last in the tribe. Once the sun came up, the tension was palpable as they tried to get the fire going as Gabler and Elie butted heads over building a fire and the size of the fucking sticks used.

Before you even had time to appreciate my Eliza reference, the tribes joined together for the first solo reward of the season where one person from each tribe would knock blocks of a ledge with sandbags and then roll on two blocks to the end of a field, before handing off sandbags to the other three people who each have to land one on a hanging disc. With the winners getting to go to one of the losing camps and looting an item, in addition to ten fish. Cody dominated the first section of the challenge putting Vesi well out in front as Sami tried to nip at his heels and Ryan completely fell out of it. Despite Baka slowly catching up and Coco getting back in the game, Vesi finally landed their third bag and scored the power to loot (and the food).

After farewelling the losing tribes, Noelle bartered with Jeff to trade the fish for fruit and a fishing kit instead, given they still have no fire and therefore can not eat fish. Back at camp they celebrated by eating her success like royalty – RIP, Liz – as they spoke about who should go to the other tribe, with Cody offering to go and cause a little chaos. Which instantly filled Dwight with fear, given Cody is such a wildcard. Talk turned to which camp they should go to, with Baka having the most gear but Coco having the most people and as such, they wanted to hurt them. After locking in Coco, they planned to go after the machete as the most likely way to hurt them. Or at the very least, open them up to negotiate for the reward they really wanted.

The tribe were heartbroken as Cody arrived at Coco, with Cassidy seeing the choice to rob them for what it is and instantly turned on the charm to protect themselves. Cody too was turning on his charm, while Lindsay freaked out at the thought of losing the machete. Thankfully (kinda) James stepped in and started bartering, giving him limes, fishing gear and some root vegetables. And while Karla could see just how badly they played it, the rest of the tribe were grateful he didn’t take the machete. Which was never even Vesi’s plan. But hey, Cody now is in trouble because Queen Karla is out for blood, so it was a messy trip for all of them, I guess.

The tribes rejoined Probst for the next immunity challenge where they would race to knock sandbags off a ledge to find keys, unlock puzzle pieces, drag them under nets and then build a square. Once said square was built, they would then dismantle it and carry the pieces up a cargo net to build a triangle with the last placed tribe heading off to tribal council. Baka absolutely demolished the sandbags and got out to an early lead,  while Vesi stayed right on their tail, as Coco brought up the rear. Baka swiftly built their square and got it checked off before moving on to the final puzzle while Vesi trailed behind and Coco grew more and more confused. Eventually all three tribes started work on the triangle before Vesi solved it out of nowhere. Before they got to work helping Baka along to force Coco off to tribal council. Which is exactly what happened. And is oh so shady. And. I. LOVE IT.

Back at camp Coco were frustrated by the fact the other two tribes had banded together to send them to tribal council. When it came to the scramble, Ryan was just trying to protect his ally Geo, who in turn was targeting Cassidy given everyone else has a strong relationship with her but him. Cassidy then approached the girls to lock in the vote against Geo for sassing her out, with James quickly on board. And just like that, it was a done deal.

Well, until Lindsay happened, as she decided it was too easy and started to question why people are still running around and talking. She then approached her allies and confronted them for scrambling without her and not talking to her, which made Karla question whether they should actually turn on her given that paranoia is only going to get worse the further they go along. James tried to pull Lindsay aside to talk some sense into her and calm things down and when it didn’t go well – at all – James was on board to get rid of her. Despite Geo’s growing ego frustrating them.

At tribal council the tribe were gagged to see Jeff and the set with Ryan opening up about how strong they are and how well they are getting along. James jumped in and praised Ryan for being their provider, with Jeff sweetly praising him for embracing the adventure of the game. Lindsay spoke about the fact they know what works for them, well until today, when everyone started to scramble. And then pointedly said that some people didn’t talk to her. While Ryan pointed out she didn’t give the vibe she wanted to speak to him, with Geo admitting that as long as the vote is not on him, he doesn’t really care. Karla meanwhile tried to explain why you have to continue to confirm the plan is still on and nothing has changed, leading to Lindsay admitting that she did that a little too much and may have made her a little paranoid.

Geo admitted that he wanted to make sure his people were calm, which made Cassidy point out that just because it looks calm on the surface, does not mean there isn’t chaos below. James said that he was just trying to stay calm to make others calm, while Cassidy admitted they won’t really know who they can trust until the vote happens. And well, given they were still talking all the way up to leaving for tribal council, Karla felt there were still way too many questions in the air. With that the tribe voted and despite being excited for them to be read, Lindsay was gagged to see that her allies had deserted her and joined Ryan to boot her from the game.

Making her paranoia prophetic, I guess?

Lindsay was well and truly shocked as she made her way to Loser Lodge, unsure whether she was right to be paranoid or if that is what cost her the game. Which obviously meant I kindly stepped in to assure her that she was completely safe until it got to her but given it made for an iconic (flameout) exit, she will have burned a place in the hearts and minds of fans and as such, she is the perfect candidate for a future Second Chances season. And that is the kind of comfort that is only bested by a Lindsay Carmiener Pretzel.

I love buns, and more importantly, sausages in buns, so you know a weiner pretzel is something I love in and around my mouth. A little bit sweet and a whole lot salty, these giant pretzel-pigs-in-blankets are perfection.

Enjoy!

Lindsay Carmiener Pretzel 
Makes: 8.

Ingredients
1 cup milk
7g dry yeast
3 tbsp packed light brown sugar
2 ¼ cups plain flour
30g butter, softened and diced
1 tsp fine salt
8 hot dog wieners
¼ cup baking soda
1 egg, lightly whisked
maldon salt flakes

Method
Warm the milk in a saucepan until it is roughly 50C and pour into a large mixing bowl for a stand mixture. Sprinkle in the yeast and leave to bask in the warm milk bath for about 2 minutes before stirring in the brown sugar and 1 cup of the flour. Add the butter and stir into the mix. Add the remaining flour and the fine salt and knead in a stand mixer with a dough hook for 3-5 minutes or until it is smooth yet a little bit sticky. Shape into a ball and leave to prove in a warm place, in a lightly oiled bowl covered with cling wrap for about two to three hours.

While the dough is proving, preheat the oven to 220C.

Punch the dough back and divide into 8 pieces. Roll and stretch each piece with the palms of your hands into a 40cm(ish) rope shape before coiling each around a weiner, pressing together to enclose as you go, leaving just a little tip of weiner at each end. And honestly, I’m not even trying with the innuendo anymore, I just can’t stop. Pop on a lined baking sheet, cover with a tea towel and leave them to prove for 20 minutes or so.

Pop 2L of water in a Dutch oven with the baking soda and bring to a gentle boil. It will bubble easily, so keep an eye on it the entire time. Working two at a time, pop the pretzels in the boiling water and cook for a couple of minutes, flipping once half-way through. Remove with a slotted spoon and return to the baking tray.

Once they are all boiled, brush each with some egg, sprinkle with salt and pop in the oven to bake for 15 minutes, or until golden brown. Remove from the oven to cool for ten minutes or so before devouring, alongside your favourite condiment.


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Minnie Cooperstown

Drink, RuPaul’s Drag Race Down Under, RuPaul’s Drag Race Down Under 2, TV, TV Recap

Previously on Drag Race Down Under the dolls hosted a cute little brunch in duos. While Molly tried to do a little bit of sabo, by pairing herself with her bestie Hannah while making sure every other pair had a contender. And well, not. Despite Yuri disappearing for half the day to go to hospital, she and Spaknie absolutely slayed their set – CUM (which is generally the culprit of all eye irritations in my house, but I digress) – while Pomara and Bev just felt like they were at two different venues. As such Spankie and Yuri took out a very well earned joint victory while Bev and Pomara faced off in the lip sync, with Pomara tragically shown the door.

Backstage Bev was well and truly in her feels, though was giddy to have survived. She was feeling like everyone was ready for her to go next, though was ready to gag them. Speaking of gag, she opened up about her and Pomara not getting along in the challenge and while she wasn’t comfortable then, she assured her sisters she was ready to speak up as needed. She congratulated Spankie and Yuri on their joint victory, with Spankie giddy to be the first two-time winner of the season. While Hannah questioned whether she is maybe cursed and is the reason she and Molly didn’t win. Oh and then she questioned whether her topping Spankie would look like a Chihuahua doing a Great Dane which adds nothing to the story, but is a very important visual.

The next day the dolls were full of energy and having the best damn time, while Hannah admitted she continues to have a steely focus on hitting the top. She opened up about being emotionally drained, leading to a beautiful discussion amongst the girls about mental health and the general pressure of the competition. Ru then dropped by and gagged them once again with the news that for this week’s Maxi Challenge they would be playing the Snatch Game. As she left, the dolls split up to talk characters with Spankie bringing Dame Edna to the stage and yes, that is perfect for her. Yuri is going with my girl Courtney Love, Minnie is doing Ellen while Molly is going with zaddy Orville Peck, which made Spankie particularly nervous.

Ru returned for a walk through with Hannah debating between Liza and Drew Barrymore, though ideally will follow Alexis rather than Willow. Bev was thinking she would go with Val Garland, until Ru questioned whether anyone found her funny in her real life. Kween Kong was going with Nene Leakes, opening up to Ru that she was hoping to get out of her head, let go and finally have some fun. Minnie was excited by Ellen which thrilled Ru, though I wish she went with the one she was joking about, Mr G. She then threw Bev under the bus, telling Ru she was gagged by Bev lying about getting along with Pomara on the mainstage and well, there is going to be drama once again.

After Ru departed, Yuri was looking forward to being messy, Hannah was a mix of emotions while Kween opened up about her talk to Ru making her feel seen and ready to shine. She opened up about her upbringing and life, feeling guilty about leaving her family behind to start her career and succeed, always worrying about making it up to them. Hannah then brought up Bev seeming a little down, with her calling out Minnie for throwing her under the bus in front of Ru and telling her it hurt her feelings.

We ventured to the Snatch Game set where Rhys and Raven joined the dolls to compete, where Minnie was confusing and Kween was a zaddy and selling Nene’s energy. Yuri was a delightful mess, Bev was a little confusing but so committed while Hannah stole the damn show as Liza. Molly was hilariously off character, while Spankie was a killer Dame Edna. But make no mistake, this was Hannah’s breakout challenge. I mean, her Liza was a masterclass and so much damn fun. I mean, she even followed in Jinkx’s trajectory of singing covers of Ru’s songs. And it was perfect. Though Yuri and Spankie were also super fun. And while Minnie and Molly were a mess, Bev was forgettable, which is the far greater sin in Snatch Game.

Elimination Day arrived with the dolls recapping their performances, with Hannah thrilled to clearly be getting her first win while Bev was feeling fine. Which elicited eyerolls from everyone. Minnie meanwhile knew that she bombed, though was hopeful her runway would be able to save her. As they split up to beat their mugs, Spankie suggested they do impersonations of each other with Hannah and Spankie nailing each other. Molly did a pitch perfect Minnie, but more importantly, was brave to do it. Kween read Yuri for filth, by saying her sitting there was a Yuri impression and again, Kween is my life and loins at this point.

On the Cirque Du So-Gay runway, Minnie slayed the runway as the rollergirl clown while Kween was the sexiest bearded lady, complete with a full, shimering bush. Spankie slayed in a harlequin mime number, Yuri was a sexy showgirl in white, complete with a tattooed burlesque show. Bev went full sexy lion, lion-tamer, owning the big top, Molly was perfection as a fairy floss mime-clown, while Hannah gave sexy-jester realness.

Kween was sent to safety solo before Minnie was praised for her runway, though read for absolutely bombing Snatch Game. Spankie was praised for doing well, despite Michelle wanting more, while her runway was praised for her growth. And by that, I assume Michelle meant pants. Yuri was praised for leaning into the stupid and agan, slaying the runway. While Bev’s runway received universal praise, her Snatch was read for absolute filth for just missing every damn mark. She then opened up about feeling like an imposter, before Ru encouraged her to kill the inner saboteur and slay. Molly’s runway was beloved, though her Orville was read for being nothing. While Hannah received effusive praise for literally everything she did this week, from the runway to her Liza. And well, that praise was deserved.

Backstage Kween’s peace and quiet was interrupted by the rest of the dolls with everyone congratulating Hannah on slaying the game. Bev opened up about feeling the pressure of the competition, while Minnie started to break down, feeling bad for having upset Bev and stressed about it playing on her mind when she clearly has to lip sync. Molly meanwhile was nervous about lip syncing because Minnie is beloved by the judges.

Obviously Hannah took out victory while Spankie and Yuri were deemed safe. On the flipside, Molly narrowly avoided lip syncing, leaving current feuders Minnie and Bev to battle for safety. To Lady Gaga’s Dance in the Dark, no less. While Minnie delighted in clown comedy, Bev was desperate to save herself, giving all the emotion and slaying every damn lyric and well, it was good. Good enough to give her another week and tragically send the legend that is Minnie Cooper home. Thankfully with a lot of love from her sisters.

While I was tempted to start a feud with her when she walked backstage – I crave the attention, you know – I couldn’t do that to such an icon. Instead, I pulled Minnie in for a massive hug and reiterated how damn proud of her I am. Not only is she a killer performer that has well and truly earned her legacy, she also knew the assignment when coming on reality TV and gave us camp, gaggy moments and a lot of heart. I then asked her if she had any other potential people she was tossing around for Snatch Game and upon hearing she opted against doing Jeanne Little, who she would have demolished the competition with, I lost it. There were tears, rage screams and well, I am ashamed at how much it hurt. Thankfully after her holding me in her arms and assuring me it was ok, and downing a Minnie Cooperstown, everything was all good.

This little drink is the perfect pick-me-up when you’re feeling down, earthy, sweet and packing a minty punch, it is a symphony of flavours that fill your heart with joy.

So, enjoy!

Minnie Cooperstown
Serves: 1.

Ingredients
45ml gin
25ml red vermouth
35ml dry vermouth
a couple of dashes of bitters
2 mint leaves

Method
Combine everything in a cocktail shaker with ice and stir to chill. Strain into a glass and down.

And then repeat, as necessary (in a responsible manner).


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Kafloss

Canada's Drag Race 3, Canada’s Drag Race, Snack, Sweets, TV, TV Recap

Previously on Canada’s Drag Race the dolls were paired up to put on some cheeky little lip syncs to RuPaul classics. While Vivian tried to be fair by pairing people up with people they vibed with, Fiercalicious obviously felt like she was being set up by being partnered with Bombae. Though maybe that was because she kinda got lost in the performance, landed in the bottom with Chelazon as Jada took out her first win of the season. Thankfully Fiercalicious found her fight in the lip sync that counted, leaving everything on the floor as she sent Chelazon home. Or out the door, if you want to rhyme.

Backstage Kaos was heartbroken to lose her fellow prairie sister, while everyone was grateful to get to know her and for all that she taught them in her time in the competition. Kaos opened up to her sisters about how much Chelazon meant to her, with Bombae loving how much intent she puts into everything. Fiercalicious tried to act all sad, which made Jada laugh about how silly and insincere she sounded. Everyone then toasted Jada on her first victory, though my favourite performance of hers is that she just can’t get Irma Gerd’s name right.

The next day everyone was upbeat and ready to fight, with Kaos feeling fired up while Vivian and Fiercalicious made up. Sadly though, Fiercalicious confronted Jada for not being friendly enough to her in the competition, giving they are close outside of the competition. And well, it is hilarious, given everyone just feels like she constantly has beef with people. While Giselle just rolled her eyes at the camera before Jada apologised so they could all move on.

Traci dropped by to put the girls through their paces giving oral … presentations, lecturing in quick drag. On a topic that they won’t learn until they take the stage. After barely beating their mugs in quick drag, Jada took the stage for her Tuck Talk about The Raw Truth: My Journey From Single to Soulmate. She was charming and confident, Bombae was silly, Boom Boom was chic, Kaos a literal confused, Giselle was adorbs as she giggled and offered gobbies, Fiercalicious was perfectly dumb and Vivian was just a star. While poor Irma and Kimmy were confused by the more absurd graphics that kept popping up. Despite Vivian slaying, it was Jada that took out yet another victory.

And as the victor, she was given the power to allocate everyone a box of design materials for this week’s Maxi Challenge. Kaos got spooky, Giselle got crusty, quirky went to Kimmy, Bombae was old fashioned, Irma was given sporty, crafty went to Boom Boom, she snatched fiery for herself, giving Flirty to Fiercalicious while Vivian got Basic. And well, they were some shady allocations for their runway looks. Sadly for Jada though, every box actually had the exact same contents and well, it was shady and fun of the producers. And you know Fiercalicious was pressed about it. But was she ever not going to be?

Everyone quickly split up to start working on their outfits with Vivian ready to slay a spider lady look, in all its 80s glory. Irma was going down the club kid route, while Fiercalicious approached Boom Boom to drag her through the challenge again. Giselle meanwhile was hoping to destroy the sewing challenge, given it is her passion. And well, her drawing looked amazing. Boom Boom meanwhile was feeling the pressure given she took out the first design challenge, while Kimmy was worried about being read for being basic.

Traci returned to kiki with the girls, with Jada sharing she would be very alien, galaxy, wait no, futuristic. And gurl, you’re in danger. Giselle was confident in her Valentino/Versace inspired look, ready to break through and stamp her place in the competition. Bombae was ready to tell the story of her journey and breaking out of her head while Boom Boom was getting more and more nervous about pulling it off. Fiercalicious was just hoping to avoid the bottom, while Kimmy wanted to make Mama Icesis proud. But yeah, maybe she won’t? Kaos was worried about being too crafty, Vivian was going busty 80s cowgirl and Irma was going balls to the wall. Well, head.

After Traci exited everyone started work glueing their outfits, while the other side were calmly sewing. And huffing the glue fumes wafting over. Bombae kikied with Vivian and Giselle, glad to have some serenity rather than hearing them complain about it. Fiercalicious and Jada meanwhile were kiki-ing about their futuristic looks and while Jada was ready to top, I just don’t see it.

Elimination Day arrived with Irma opening up about her journey to drag, slowly working her way up to be the biggest queen in the province. Kimmy spoke about starting drag because nobody could dance and while they didn’t want to book her as a woman, she pretended to be a man and started her career. Talk turned to the concept of gender and how the drag scene needs to be open to all genders and people need to wake up. Irma spoke about fighting with a fellow queen for drag being about mocking women – it is not – while Kimmy didn’t want to be expected to educate everyone all the damn time about being trans.

Brooke and Traci were joined by the iconic Jimbo and Sarain Fox on the judges panel, complete with Jimbo throwing bologna at Brooke. Bombae opened the Bitch Stole My Look runway in a striped silver and purple bodysuit looking like Storm. Vivian was glamorous and ready for the Oscars, Giselle was dripping glamour in a grecian goddess number, Kimmy slayed as a warrior princess, Fiercalicious was an architectural delight in silver while Irma Gerd gave the most glamorous clown known to man. Boom Boom was a frilly, layered delight while Jada was a slutty, silver English guard slash nutcracker before Kaos gave paper-spike Ru promo look realness.

Giselle, Irma, Kaos, Bombae, Kimmy and Jada were deemed the tops and bottoms of the week, with the rest of the queens heading backstage to untuck. Bombae was praised for giving a lovely final look, though everyone felt the reveal was pointless. Giselle received universal praise particularly for boning the corset herself backstage. Kimmy was praised for nailing the walk and looking like a warrior princess, despite giving a similar silhouette before. Irma too was beloved for giving all the fun on the runway, despite it being sloppy. Jaida meanwhile was read for absolute filth. Particularly for doing way too much. Kaos’ mug received praise, despite her look being kind of a staple of all design challenges. And not being able to walk in it.

Brooke then got shady and asked who should go home with Bombae suggesting Kaos is the weakest with her repetitive looks. Giselle identified Jada for her ugly look, as did Kimmy and Irma, which immediately made her cry. She then identified Kaos, while she returned the favour.

Backstage the dolls were feeling it as Irma broke down in tears over having to say who should go home. Kaos meanwhile was annoyed by Bombae saying she should go home, which obviously made Fiercalicious jump in and pile on Bombae for not telling her her outfit was ugly in the first week. Bombae cut off Kaos and told her she wouldn’t have given her a wig if she didn’t love her before reading Fiercalicious as difficult to be around and that is why she didn’t critique her. Jada felt like the judges felt she and Kaos were on the same level, which Giselle disagreed with given the judges straight up laughed at her. While Kaos and Fiercalicious were shocked Bombae was in the top. Jada then confronted Kimmy for calling her out on stage, with Kimmy reiterating she had the worst critiques. 

Fiercalicious then asked Kimmy about her upsetting her way back in the second week, apologising for making her feel bad. And then continuing to fight. Thankfully though Boom Boom turned the attention on Jezabel, sorry Giselle, and her killer look.

Ultimately Bombae was deemed safe before Giselle took out her first win of the season, leaving Kimmy as safe. When it came to the bottoms – yes, yes, we’re all bottoms – Irma narrowly avoided the lip sync, as Kaos and Jada took their places in the bottom two. As soon as Stranger in my House kicked off, Jada got to work pulling off her outfit and lit a fire underneath herself as she slayed the performance and gave all the attitude. While Kaos channelled all the emotion, Jada was splitting and pounding her pussy into the stage and well, that is just something no one can compete with. As such, Jada once again saved herself as Kaos exited the competition.

As she made her way backstage, I pulled sweet Kaos aside and assured her that despite leaving early, her talent shone through and the world had fallen in love with her. Or at the very least, should have. Kaos is such a kind, gentle soul and I was heartbroken to see her go, but was glad to toast that success with a big tuft of Kafloss.

So, who knew you could make your own floss at home without a spinner? I mean, sure, it is well and truly an arm workout. But for eating a bowl full of sugar without having to eat a bowl full of sugar, it is well and truly worth it.

Enjoy!

Kafloss
Serves: 2 dear friends.

Ingredients
1 ½ cups raw caster sugar
5 tbsp corn syrup
2 tsp water
3 drops food colouring, red or pink (or whatever you want)

Method
Pop everything in a saucepan and stir together over medium heat until it hits 160°C. Remove from the heat.

Dip a whisk in the syrup and quickly wave it over some baking paper, back and forth, to mimic a fairy floss machine, until strings of sugar form. Repeat as necessary, heating again as needed, until all the syrup is gone and you’re left with a glorious mound of floss.

Then devour.


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