Kafloss

Canada's Drag Race 3, Canada’s Drag Race, Snack, Sweets, TV, TV Recap

Previously on Canada’s Drag Race the dolls were paired up to put on some cheeky little lip syncs to RuPaul classics. While Vivian tried to be fair by pairing people up with people they vibed with, Fiercalicious obviously felt like she was being set up by being partnered with Bombae. Though maybe that was because she kinda got lost in the performance, landed in the bottom with Chelazon as Jada took out her first win of the season. Thankfully Fiercalicious found her fight in the lip sync that counted, leaving everything on the floor as she sent Chelazon home. Or out the door, if you want to rhyme.

Backstage Kaos was heartbroken to lose her fellow prairie sister, while everyone was grateful to get to know her and for all that she taught them in her time in the competition. Kaos opened up to her sisters about how much Chelazon meant to her, with Bombae loving how much intent she puts into everything. Fiercalicious tried to act all sad, which made Jada laugh about how silly and insincere she sounded. Everyone then toasted Jada on her first victory, though my favourite performance of hers is that she just can’t get Irma Gerd’s name right.

The next day everyone was upbeat and ready to fight, with Kaos feeling fired up while Vivian and Fiercalicious made up. Sadly though, Fiercalicious confronted Jada for not being friendly enough to her in the competition, giving they are close outside of the competition. And well, it is hilarious, given everyone just feels like she constantly has beef with people. While Giselle just rolled her eyes at the camera before Jada apologised so they could all move on.

Traci dropped by to put the girls through their paces giving oral … presentations, lecturing in quick drag. On a topic that they won’t learn until they take the stage. After barely beating their mugs in quick drag, Jada took the stage for her Tuck Talk about The Raw Truth: My Journey From Single to Soulmate. She was charming and confident, Bombae was silly, Boom Boom was chic, Kaos a literal confused, Giselle was adorbs as she giggled and offered gobbies, Fiercalicious was perfectly dumb and Vivian was just a star. While poor Irma and Kimmy were confused by the more absurd graphics that kept popping up. Despite Vivian slaying, it was Jada that took out yet another victory.

And as the victor, she was given the power to allocate everyone a box of design materials for this week’s Maxi Challenge. Kaos got spooky, Giselle got crusty, quirky went to Kimmy, Bombae was old fashioned, Irma was given sporty, crafty went to Boom Boom, she snatched fiery for herself, giving Flirty to Fiercalicious while Vivian got Basic. And well, they were some shady allocations for their runway looks. Sadly for Jada though, every box actually had the exact same contents and well, it was shady and fun of the producers. And you know Fiercalicious was pressed about it. But was she ever not going to be?

Everyone quickly split up to start working on their outfits with Vivian ready to slay a spider lady look, in all its 80s glory. Irma was going down the club kid route, while Fiercalicious approached Boom Boom to drag her through the challenge again. Giselle meanwhile was hoping to destroy the sewing challenge, given it is her passion. And well, her drawing looked amazing. Boom Boom meanwhile was feeling the pressure given she took out the first design challenge, while Kimmy was worried about being read for being basic.

Traci returned to kiki with the girls, with Jada sharing she would be very alien, galaxy, wait no, futuristic. And gurl, you’re in danger. Giselle was confident in her Valentino/Versace inspired look, ready to break through and stamp her place in the competition. Bombae was ready to tell the story of her journey and breaking out of her head while Boom Boom was getting more and more nervous about pulling it off. Fiercalicious was just hoping to avoid the bottom, while Kimmy wanted to make Mama Icesis proud. But yeah, maybe she won’t? Kaos was worried about being too crafty, Vivian was going busty 80s cowgirl and Irma was going balls to the wall. Well, head.

After Traci exited everyone started work glueing their outfits, while the other side were calmly sewing. And huffing the glue fumes wafting over. Bombae kikied with Vivian and Giselle, glad to have some serenity rather than hearing them complain about it. Fiercalicious and Jada meanwhile were kiki-ing about their futuristic looks and while Jada was ready to top, I just don’t see it.

Elimination Day arrived with Irma opening up about her journey to drag, slowly working her way up to be the biggest queen in the province. Kimmy spoke about starting drag because nobody could dance and while they didn’t want to book her as a woman, she pretended to be a man and started her career. Talk turned to the concept of gender and how the drag scene needs to be open to all genders and people need to wake up. Irma spoke about fighting with a fellow queen for drag being about mocking women – it is not – while Kimmy didn’t want to be expected to educate everyone all the damn time about being trans.

Brooke and Traci were joined by the iconic Jimbo and Sarain Fox on the judges panel, complete with Jimbo throwing bologna at Brooke. Bombae opened the Bitch Stole My Look runway in a striped silver and purple bodysuit looking like Storm. Vivian was glamorous and ready for the Oscars, Giselle was dripping glamour in a grecian goddess number, Kimmy slayed as a warrior princess, Fiercalicious was an architectural delight in silver while Irma Gerd gave the most glamorous clown known to man. Boom Boom was a frilly, layered delight while Jada was a slutty, silver English guard slash nutcracker before Kaos gave paper-spike Ru promo look realness.

Giselle, Irma, Kaos, Bombae, Kimmy and Jada were deemed the tops and bottoms of the week, with the rest of the queens heading backstage to untuck. Bombae was praised for giving a lovely final look, though everyone felt the reveal was pointless. Giselle received universal praise particularly for boning the corset herself backstage. Kimmy was praised for nailing the walk and looking like a warrior princess, despite giving a similar silhouette before. Irma too was beloved for giving all the fun on the runway, despite it being sloppy. Jaida meanwhile was read for absolute filth. Particularly for doing way too much. Kaos’ mug received praise, despite her look being kind of a staple of all design challenges. And not being able to walk in it.

Brooke then got shady and asked who should go home with Bombae suggesting Kaos is the weakest with her repetitive looks. Giselle identified Jada for her ugly look, as did Kimmy and Irma, which immediately made her cry. She then identified Kaos, while she returned the favour.

Backstage the dolls were feeling it as Irma broke down in tears over having to say who should go home. Kaos meanwhile was annoyed by Bombae saying she should go home, which obviously made Fiercalicious jump in and pile on Bombae for not telling her her outfit was ugly in the first week. Bombae cut off Kaos and told her she wouldn’t have given her a wig if she didn’t love her before reading Fiercalicious as difficult to be around and that is why she didn’t critique her. Jada felt like the judges felt she and Kaos were on the same level, which Giselle disagreed with given the judges straight up laughed at her. While Kaos and Fiercalicious were shocked Bombae was in the top. Jada then confronted Kimmy for calling her out on stage, with Kimmy reiterating she had the worst critiques. 

Fiercalicious then asked Kimmy about her upsetting her way back in the second week, apologising for making her feel bad. And then continuing to fight. Thankfully though Boom Boom turned the attention on Jezabel, sorry Giselle, and her killer look.

Ultimately Bombae was deemed safe before Giselle took out her first win of the season, leaving Kimmy as safe. When it came to the bottoms – yes, yes, we’re all bottoms – Irma narrowly avoided the lip sync, as Kaos and Jada took their places in the bottom two. As soon as Stranger in my House kicked off, Jada got to work pulling off her outfit and lit a fire underneath herself as she slayed the performance and gave all the attitude. While Kaos channelled all the emotion, Jada was splitting and pounding her pussy into the stage and well, that is just something no one can compete with. As such, Jada once again saved herself as Kaos exited the competition.

As she made her way backstage, I pulled sweet Kaos aside and assured her that despite leaving early, her talent shone through and the world had fallen in love with her. Or at the very least, should have. Kaos is such a kind, gentle soul and I was heartbroken to see her go, but was glad to toast that success with a big tuft of Kafloss.

So, who knew you could make your own floss at home without a spinner? I mean, sure, it is well and truly an arm workout. But for eating a bowl full of sugar without having to eat a bowl full of sugar, it is well and truly worth it.

Enjoy!

Kafloss
Serves: 2 dear friends.

Ingredients
1 ½ cups raw caster sugar
5 tbsp corn syrup
2 tsp water
3 drops food colouring, red or pink (or whatever you want)

Method
Pop everything in a saucepan and stir together over medium heat until it hits 160°C. Remove from the heat.

Dip a whisk in the syrup and quickly wave it over some baking paper, back and forth, to mimic a fairy floss machine, until strings of sugar form. Repeat as necessary, heating again as needed, until all the syrup is gone and you’re left with a glorious mound of floss.

Then devour.


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Chelazon Lereuben

Canada's Drag Race 3, Canada’s Drag Race, Main, Sandwich, Street Food, TV, TV Recap

Previously on Canada’s Drag Race the dolls celebrated themselves and everyone’s favourite season, awards by hosting and winning a myriad of categories at the inaugural The Who Knows? Awards. Despite fighting all week – to the point of Fiercalicious suggesting Chelazon was trying to set the besties up – she and Kimmy slayed the game. At the other end of the pack, Jada and Moço – other besties that Chelazon paired together – couldn’t bring their back-home magic to the stage, landing in the bottom two together, with Jada sending dear, sweet Moço out of the competition.

Backstage the dolls were shocked by how emotional it was watching Jada send her frequent collaborator slash best friend, Miss Moço, home, while everyone was gagged to realise that the only people eliminated so far were Toronto queens. And each and every time, they were eliminated by their fellow Toronto sisters. Which made Vivian thrilled to be the sole rep from BC. Talk flipped to the top of the pack with everyone congratulating Kimmy on dominating the challenge. And well, she was just excited to prove that she is a comedy queen.

Everyone returned refreshed and renewed the next day, with Vivian ready to ramp it up with a win. Fiercalicious meanwhile was also manifesting a win this week, while Kaos was letting her nervous energy out via burps. Brooke dropped by to remind the dolls that dating is hard and as such, for this week’s Mini Challenge they would do a quick boy-drag for a date with her as practice. And well, Fiercalicious was wearing a jockstrap in the Werk Room. So yeah, I’m wet. Giselle arrived dressed as Grandpa Brooke and it was so damn fun, Kaos went cowboy zaddy rocking leather, so yeah, still wet. Irma Gerd was giving Tom Green in Charlie’s Angels vibes, in the hottest way possible. Bombae gave Grandy Chic, complete with a catheter bag. Kimmy was a rival sugar baby, while Boom Boom was a mess but looked hot, so yeah, I love it. Jada was hot, Fiercalicious rocked the jock before Chelazon was oddly sexual as a beaver catcher and then Vivian stole the show as part Aussie part rat and well, it was hilarious and had Brooke snorting.

Which obviously scored her the win. Because, duh. She’s only ‘uman.

Brooke then gagged the dolls by announcing that for this week’s Maxi Challenge, the dolls would be lip syncing Ru’s catalogue of duets on the mainstage. In pairs. With that, Brooke told everyone to form their own duos, with Chelazon and Kaos getting together, Bombae and Fiercalicious teaming up, Jada and Irma, Boom Boom and Kimmy while Giselle and Vivian quickly grabbed each other. Oh and as the winner of this week’s Mini Challenge, Viv – not to be confused with THE Viv – would have full control over who performs what songs. So well played there, Giselle.

The dolls gathered around to talk songs with Vivian letting everyone talk about which ones they wanted. Which obviously meant everyone wanted the same, forcing Vivian to upset everyone. With Bombae and Fiercalious totally enraged by getting the slow-tempo song, Let The Music Play. Though everyone else was mostly happy, so I guess that’s ok? Irma and Jada talked about how they would turn Peanut Butter, with Jada smartly suggesting they play off their differences. Kaos and Chelazon meanwhile were bonding over the shared First Nations history, and well, it was so beautiful to watch them talk and have Chelazon give Kaos a pep talk about always feeling proud enough to speak up about her experience and to never feel like she isn’t enough. As Vivian and Giselle were living their best lives in rehearsal, Fiercalicious looked on filled in rage and well. It was a mood.

Brooke dragged the queens to the mainstage for rehearsals with Brooke’s former lip sync partner Vanjie. Chelazon and Kaos were going very high energy for Adrenaline. Boom Boom and Kimmy were absolute fire, complete with duckwalks before Bombae dragged her sad partner Fiercalicious to rehearse and almost killed each other by falling from the stage. Irma and Jada looked to be killing it and having fun, while Vivian and Giselle had a very strong base, though Brooke and Vanjie felt they needed a little more thought behind it.

Elimination Day arrived with Boom Boom opening up about her loving partner’s massive dick – which Kimmy could confirm, given she spoke to him on the apps before the duo got together – while Giselle was ready to marry her boyfriend. Things went a little wild as Fiercalicious tried to apologise to Vivian, which annoyed Giselle who called her out for being unnecessarily nasty and as such, told her it will take more than an apology. Despite Vivian being happy to accept it and ready to just move on.

Brooke and Traci were joined on the judges panel by Hollywood Jade and the iconic Miss Vanjie. Kaos and Chelazon opened the show and while Kaos slayed from the start, poor Chelazon appeared to be struggling to stay on the beat and to keep up with her sister. Then as she warmed up, Kaos started to fade. Boom Boom and Kimmy absolutely demolished their song. Fiercalicious and Bombae were far more upbeat than the tempo of Let The Music Play, Jada and Irma were perfect from start to finish, while Vivian and Giselle rocked out with synchronised disco.

Jada was a golden delight as she opened the Sleeves runway. Irma meanwhile was a pastel, under the sea delight, Fiercalicious gave revealed glamour clown, Bombae gave a killer black hair-sleeve number, Chelazon rocked a gorgeous ribboned, two spirit number, Kaos wore a stunning turquoise gown into disco diva, Vivian slayed in a black and white striped gown made of small hands on the skirt, Giselle was stunning in a pink, glamour pantsuit. Also with tiny hands in the jacket. Kimmy rocked a regal black and gold Asian royalty outfit. While Boom Boom was so damn run in a red, mod jacket. 

Ultimately Jada, Irma Gerd, Kimmy and Boom Boom were deemed the top before Jada snatched her first win for the season. The four were sent to untuck while the others took their places to be read. Fiercalicious was read for being a mess and not wanting to be there, while Bombae got off as just a little better. Chelazon meanwhile apologised for not having enough energy, which the judges noted, though they liked her runway. Kaos then apologised for being awkward with Vanjie giving her a sweet pep talk, while the judges read her and Chelazon for not working together on stage. Vivian was read for being off the beat, though she and Giselle were both read for not working together and just kinda being there in each other’s presence.

Backstage the dolls congratulated Jada on her first win, while Chelzon broke down over the critiques and feeling so misunderstood. That being said, none of the bottoms could tell who would be lip syncing. Well, except for Vivian and Giselle were just high-fiving with their baby hands and living their best lives.

Returning to the mainstage, Vivian and Giselle were quickly sent to safety before Fiercalicious was sent through to the bottom two. She was gagged to learn her duet partner Bombae was safe, as was Kaos, leaving her to battle with Chelazon to Don’t Call Me Baby by Kreesha Turner. And while Chelazon was emotional and powerful in all the right ways, there is no denying that Miss Fiercalicious is a star. She worked the stage, hit every lyric and carried every emotional beat, and was, as her name suggests, absolutely fierce. So fierce, she saved herself and sent the lovely Chelazon home.

But given she is lovely, she took her elimination in her stride as I pulled her in for a hug backstage. Chelazon has been such a kind, calming presence throughout the competition, sharing so much of herself in addition to her talent, that I am grateful for all that we got to witness from her throughout the competition. So grateful, in fact, that I served her up a Chelazon Lereuben to toast, quite literally, to her success.

There is something so perfect about a reuben. The salty meat, the tang of the sauerkraut and the creamy kick of the dressing work together, almost by fighting for dominance, to create the perfect comforting sandwich. Plus, swiss cheese is always the best.

Enjoy!

Chelazon Lereuben
Serves: 2.

Ingredients
4 slices Ryan Ulrich Bread
¼ cup Russian dressing
4-8 slices Pastrami Malek
4 slices Swiss cheese
½ cup Devon Sauerkraut, drained
2 tbsp unsalted butter

Method
Spread Russian Dressing – which may or may not appear soon – on each slice of bread. Top with Pastrami Malek, swiss and Devon the sauerkraut. Close the sandwich and butter the top of the bread.

Pop a skillet over medium heat and pop the sandwich in the pan, butter side down and gently butter the last remaining, exposed side of bread. Cook the sandwich for a few minutes before flipping and cooking for a further couple of minutes.

Then serve, slice in half and devour.


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French Miss Moçoa

Canada's Drag Race 3, Canada’s Drag Race, Drink, TV, TV Recap

Previously on Canada’s Drag Race twelve new queens entered the Werk Room, ready to battle it out for a crown. And TBH, our hearts. Barely able to catch their breath, the dolls walked a street style fashion show. Before they had to turn their street clothes into catwalk chic for their mainstage debut. And again, so chic, Jamie. While most of the girls were quite strong, it was Lady Boom Boom who stormed the challenge to her first victory while Miss Moço and Halal Bae landed in the bottom. And after a hard fought lip sync, my zaddy Halal Bae found herself becoming the first boot.

And just like that, my basement started to drain.

Backstage the dolls were heartbroken to have lost Halal, none more so than her baby Bombae, who was now ready to fight for their family name. As was Miss Moço, who doesn’t want to land in the bottom again ever again. Or leave her fellow Toronto queen Jada with only Fiercalicious for company. Everyone congratulated Lady Boom Boom on her victory, while Jada was more focused on the fact that Boom Boom sounds sexy and floods her basement. Which is relatable, but triggering, since Halal Bae is gone.

The next day the dolls were energetic and ready to slay a new challenge, with Irma wanting to show off her comedy chops. Kimmy meanwhile noticed a bag had been left in the Werk Room which was filled with hockey jerseys, making everyone super butch. Or something. Brad arrived to explain that the jerseys were for his new gay hockey team, but first, the dolls would need to design the team kit in the form of a 30 minute quick-drag mini-challenge. First up Jada looked a technicolour mess, Kaos was just wild, Fiercalicious was delightfully slutty, Chelazon looked at the end of her tether, Boom Boom looked absolutely stunning, Vivian was adorable, Bombae wandered aimlessly, Moço flashed her buns – a win in my eyes – Giselle looked like she had seen some shit while Irma Gerd was intense and Kimmy served sex. Not sexy, just sex.

Ultimately it was Chelazon Leroux that took out victory though. Brad then announced that for this week’s Maxi Challenge, the dolls would be nominated for AND presenting at the Who-Knows Awards. And as the winner of the Mini Challenge, Chelazon had the power to partner everyone up. After picking Giselle for herself, she paired Fiercalicious with Kimmy, gave Jada and Moço their wish of being a duo and put Irma and Vivian together, leaving Bombae, Kaos and Lady Boom Boom as the final trio. The latter of which would be presenting Busiest Beaver Award. Jada and Moço were given Frostiest Queen, Nicest Caribooty would be given out by Chelazon and Giselle, Best All Dressed would be given by Kimmy and Fiercalicious, while the Lifetime Achievement in Delusion would be presented by Irma and Vivian.

After Brad exited the dolls split up to start working on their sets, with Bombae confident in their group setting the scene and slaying. Irma and Vivian meanwhile were giggling away and coming up with the stupidest jokes possible. Jada and Moço were confident to be working together, given they do it in their real lives and were planning to leave nerves at the door. On the flipside, Fiercalicious started to spiral, worried about whether her and Kimmy can even be funny, while Chelazon and Giselle were just vibing. But more importantly, Irma and Vivian were absolutely delightful.

As Fiercalicious and Kimmy grew more and more frustrated with each other, Brad returned to check in with the girls, with Boom Boom opening up about being worried about not being funny in English. Jada and Moço were thrilled by how much Brad was living for their script, Chelazon and Giselle appeared to be on the right track while Kimmy and Fiercalicious appeared to make him nervous. Obviously Irma and Vivian were adorbs, despite Brad cautioning them to not try too hard. 

Elimination Day arrived with Kaos super nervous of the challenge, while Fiercalicious was unsure how she and Kimmy will be able to pull things together. Talk turned to everyone’s sense of humour, with Irma using humour to make friends from a young age while Bombae treated it as her lifejacket. Chelazon meanwhile opened up about humour being so important for Indigenous people, sharing that she is two spirit and sharing how laughter has helped her through the tough times. Kaos meanwhile wanted to open up about her own journey as an Indigenous person, though didn’t want it to come off as insincere, given she felt she presents too white. Which is honestly heartbreaking.

Oh and Fiercalicious continued to yell at Kimmy.

Brooke, Brad and Traci were joined by rockstar Carole Pope on the judges panel as the Who-Knows Awards kicked off. And well, as soon as Kaos, Lady Boom Boom and Bombae arrived to give out the Busiest Beaver Award, they were super cute. Albeit a little formulaic. Well, until Kaos and Boom Boom started to read their sisters, then they slayed. Oh and Jada won, because the girls actually voted on these awards. Giselle and Chelazon were camp delights as Kaos took out Best Caribooty, Moço and Jada meanwhile bombed as Frostiest Queen was bequeathed to Chelazon before Kimmy stole the damn show – despite not sticking to Fiercalicious’ direction – giving Best All Dressed to Lady Boom Boom before Irma and Vivian were silly, stupid and so much fun as the Lifetime Achievement Award for Delusion went to Miss Fiercalicious.

On the Goddess of the Ancient World runway, Kaos was a white, winter warrior bride and well, it was hot. Bombae was perfect, giving full glamour, Boom Boom was a sexy little cupid, Moço was vampy – and a little nervous – as the goddess of the underworld while Jada was a sexy snake-fish golden dream. Chelazon was a stunning sky goddess in black, while Giselle was a floral, forest delight, Kimmy was perfection as an orange sun goddess, Fiercalicious was a mirrored, golden delight before Vivian gave black and golden Norse delight and Irma closed the show as a chaotic, rainbow fairy floss delight.

Bombae, Giselle, Boom Boom, Kaos and Vivian were deemed safe and sent to untuck before Moço was praised for looking so glamorous and giving all the emotion. Though she was read for filth for bombing the challenge and missing the mark. Jada too was read for the challenge, though they also loved her runway. Chelazon received praise for powering through the challenge and for having an absolutely perfect mug, though the judges were disappointed she didn’t give enough in the looks. Kimmy meanwhile received universal praise for all that she did, from the challenge to the runway. As did Fiercalicious, despite the fact they were not vibing before taking the stage. And while Irma started strong, the judges felt she got stuck in her head and started to fade while they felt her look didn’t scream chaotic like she had hoped.

The tops and bottoms joined the girls backstage with Fiercalicious excited to be in the top, before quickly trying to rub it in Chelazon’s face, given she was trying to be shady by pairing her with Kimmy. Which is not at all what she was doing. Irma was disappointed to be in the bottom while Jada pulled focused as she broke down over her landing in the bottom. While Moço was more nervous about having to lip sync against her sister.

Ultimately it was Kimmy that took out her first win of the season as Chelazon and Fiercalicious were sent to safety. Meanwhile besties Moço and Jada’s worst fears came to life as Irma was deemed safe and they had to lip sync against each other to High School Confidential by Rough Trade (and you know, Carole Pope). And while they both fought valiantly, Jada had all the fire and emotion and managed to narrowly save herself, sending her sweet sister Miss Moço out of the competition.

As poor Moço caught up with me backstage I pulled her in for a massive hug and reminded her how talented she is. It felt like she was nervous in her short time on the show, though I reiterated that she is such a star, win or lose, and not to worry. Which quickly perked her back up. Though maybe that was, you know, the French Miss Moçoa we shared.

How does this differ from a regular hot chocolate? More chocolate and cream, essentially. But those two additions truly give you an other worldly experience. Velvety and rich, this is a decadent treat that is perfect for reminding people how talented they are.

Enjoy!

French Miss Moçoa
Serves: 2.

Ingredients
60g dark chocolate, chopped 
45g milk chocolate, chopped 
1 ¼ cups milk 
½ cup double cream 
2 tsp muscovado sugar, plus extra if needed
¼ tsp kosher salt

Method
Pop everything in a small saucepan over low heat and cook, stirring for about five minutes, or until the chocolate is melted and it is piping hot.

Pour into two mugs and down, gloriously.


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Halall Baetters

Canada's Drag Race 3, Canada’s Drag Race, Drink, TV, TV Recap

Previously on Canada’s Drag Race Brooke Lynn Hytes has welcomed 24 dolls into her folk over two seasons, with Priyanka and Icesis joining the winner’s circle. Hilariously a club that Brooke herself has not even managed to join. Along the way, we’ve met some icons and while Lemon was the first to go in UK vs. The World, she will forever be in my heart thanks to her killer Snatch Game. And then, well, Jimbo is Jimbo and her bologna clown was amazing. So basically, stop sleeping on Canada and get into it for this new batch of stunning queens.

First up being the iconic Bombae who describes herself as a model club kid who is super chaotic and well, I live for her already. Kimmy Couture arrived looking snatched and ready to break the Asian curse, more importantly she is a trans icon and the daughter of current reigning Icesis. So she is prepared but also terrified. Chelazon Leroux joined the gang looking like a stoned version of Willow’s entrance look and I kinda live. Jada Shada Hudson arrived and called herself a throat goat, so she instantly became my favourite because she is the moment. And has such a good damn vibe. And hopefully can teach us anything we’re doing wrong with our throat games. Miss Moço gave a wig reveal for her entry, so obviously I live for that before Giselle Lullaby arrived looking like Ozzy Ostrich but giving Fabio out of drag. So now I live for her.

Kaos arrived dressed as an owl and well, did she inspire the promo theme because that is amazing? Miss Fiercalious entered serving tall Jorgeous and am I turning into Ru, because well, I love this little twink. Vivian Vanderpuss was next giving old Kendall Gender, ironically being younger than her. But who cares, because she is camp, charming and a total nerd daddy out of drag. Lady Boom Boom arrived stripping off to a cute comic book look and I love her too. Particularly since she joked about coming to the competition to learn English. Irma Gerd entered serving full on weirdo and I live for every single thing about here before Halal Bae arrived giving chest hair to round out the cast, exposed face and well, she is sickening. And so damn hot. Oh and she is also Bombae’s mother and hooked up with Jada in the past, so this will totally get interesting!

Brooke dropped by before I could complete my erotic fan fiction of Halal Bae and Jada, with Brad and Traci in tow for the trio to officially welcome everyone to the competition. And what better way to welcome them than a quick little sidewalk chic mini fashion show mini challenge. But more importantly, we learnt Trojan is the cash sponsor this season. Which. Is. Iconic.

First on the runway was Bombae looking stunning in a black and yellow puffer jacket, with a reveal to biker gear and buns underneath. Moço was a neon business woman, Kimmy was damn stunning in full black, complete with conical bra and beret. Jada was fierce in clashing colours and prints while Chelazon was boudoir street. Wait no, they were denim shorts. Giselle went with a shiny neon tracksuit, Kaos was a clash of plaids looking like ‘80s Cyndi Lauper while Fiercalious was so cute in red and white. While Vivian was delightful walking imaginary dogs in a colour palette straight out of Scooby Doo, Halal Bae gave sexy raccoon, before Irma Gerd was weird and delightful, giving Paddington goes fishing. Finally, Lady Boom Boom gave Bimini does Paris Hilton and I live. Ultimately though there can only be one winner, which rightly was deemed Bombae.

The judges then announced that for this week’s Maxi Challenge they would have to design a couture outfit fit for their MainStage debut, using the clothes on their backs. And well, that is a damn challenge. More importantly, the dolls then de-dragged with everyone horny for Kaos and Halal Bae and well, relatable.

After everyone was giving their natural face, the dolls split up to start working on their outfits with Halal knowing her daughter would slay, given she has a tonne of fabric and is the seamstress of the family. Boom Boom meanwhile shared that she studied fashion which obviously led to everyone dropping by for advice for the rest of the episode. Kaos meanwhile was confident in her ideas, though concerned about the execution. Fiercalious was being shady about Chelazon to Jada and Halal, ready for her to be the first to go home. Irma and Vivian meanwhile were bonding over being from small towns and being weirdos, and well, I love them and want them to get married immediately because they are the absolute sweetest. Chelazon and Bombae meanwhile were bonding about coming from conserative towns.

Halal meanwhile was busy wishing they could have just started from scratch while Fiercalious realised she has one of the weakest looks. On the other side of the room Kimmy was continually starting over, much to Vivian’s delight as Jada hoped to fake her way through the challenge, given she is super shit at sewing. Moço started to get in her head, as Kimmy chose not to give her advice as she commenced her spiral. Oh and then Miss Fiercalious irritated everyone with her attitude and constant need for help.

Elimination Day arrived with the nerves well and truly kicking in as the Toronto dolls bonded over their diversity and how they all arrived in Toronto for a new start. Jada then opened up about how she fled from Barbados after being outed. Bombae shared that she only just got her permanent recesidency days before the competition, while Halal shared that Egypt and Kuwait weren’t the safest places to be queer, so she considers herself Canadian first. But she will always rock body hair and a moustache in honour of her heritage.

Brooke, Brad and Traci were joined by supermodel Monika Schnarre on the judges panel as Lady Boom Boom kicked off the Sidewalk to Catwalk runway, looking stunning in an architectural black and pink look. Kaos was stunning in spiky plaids, Jada gave Southern Belle straight out of Dynasty while Irma was perfection in an almost Vivian Westwood inspired look. Almost being the emphasis there. Kimmy was black swan beauty, Bombae wore a bouncing ballet gown, Moço was kinda a neon mess with a bunch of ruching down the sides. Chelzaon gave a black gown with cutouts and a message while Vivian served a stunning black gown. Halal turned her raccoon into a dominatrix, while Fiercalious was a wet hair babe, despite the dress being kind of a mess. Then Giselle stole the show in a shiny pink and chartreuse mod gown.

Ultimately Lady Boom Boom, Kaos, Jada Shade Hudson, Moço, Halal Bae and Fiercalious were deemed the tops and bottoms, as the other dolls went to untuck. The judges lived for how Lady Boom Boom turned her tracksuit into a stunning couture gown, completely transforming and elevating Juicy. Kaos was praised for clearly keeping the spirit of the first look but creating something so perfect and different. Jada too received universal praise, for the storytelling and giving such polish in the design. She then broke down, feeling like she proved herself and looks pretty, despite not being a strong sewer. Meanwhile Miss Moço was read for ruining her killer streetwear look with such an ill-fitting runway. And for clearly knowing the look wasn’t her best, with the judges reminding her to fake it when she isn’t confident. Halal was praised for being the moustache queen, though they wished her lip was a different colour despite going for raccoon. Oh and they just didn’t live for the look. While Fiercalious was praised for being perfectly beat, though read for not bringing enough of her streetwear look to the final garment.

Backstage the safe girls were thrilled to not be the first ones going home with them all agreeing Fiercalious needed the most help to get to the runway. Right on cue, she and the rest of the tops and bottoms joined them with Fiercalious admitting she will be in the bottom, despite looking pretty while Halal felt she was definitely in the bottom two. As was Moço, who shared she was the most hated. On the flip side, Jada was thrilled to be one of the Toronto girls making it to the top, particularly since she can not sew. While it was obvious Lady Boom Boom had the skills, Kaos was proud to be in the top given she was so confused. Talk turned to who should have been in the bottom instead with Bombae saying Halal should not have been in the bottom and while she didn’t want to name anyone else, outside of Fiercalious. Kimmy took the shade to the next level and asked Fiercalious how it feels to be the first one to go home before Chelazon softened things, reminding her to have fun lip syncing.

Ultimately it was Lady Boom Boom that took out the first win of the season as Jada and Kaos were sent to safety, alongside Fiercalious who was shocked AND gave an iconic crying fake out. As Moço and Halal Bae faced off to Bieber and my girl Nicky Minaj’s Beauty and a Beat, both of the dolls were ready to prove why they should stay. Moço hiked up her dress and looked infinitely better, hitting every lyric and serving face while Halal gave sex and madness and was so much fun. Though by the time Moço was somersaulting and cartwheeling, it was clear that she was not going anywhere as zaddy Halal Bae tragically sashayed away.

Straight into my arms, as I pulled him in for a strong, lingering, almost romantic hug. As we briefly separated, I gave him my usual spiel that being the first boot is just as memorable as iconic as making it to the end, so if she wasn’t going to win, this was the best place to finish. Plus, she is so sexy that the world will rally around her as a robbed goddess as we collectively lust after her. With that, she was perked up as I toasted her performance with Halall Baetters. Before cheering her up in other ways, obviously.

Yeah, yeah, lemon, lime and bitters – or LLB, thus the hybrid LL Bitters shoe horning – is super simple and easy to make, but that doesn’t take away from how damn good it is. Sweet with a tang, it is the second best thing I tasted that day. (Oh and its easily spiked with vodka for optimal delight).

Enjoy!

Halall Baetters
Serves: 2.

Ingredients
2 cups lemonade, chilled
¼ cup fresh lime juice, plus wedges for serving
½ tsp Angostura Bitters, plus extra for serving
ice, to serve

Method
Combine the lemonade, lime juice and bitters in a jug and stir until a consistent colour.

Divide the ice between two glasses, divide the LLB and then top with a few drops of bitters and lime to serve.

Then down, thirstily, for optimal energy.


As you can probably tell, we are very social but the fun isn’t only limited to celebrities! You can follow us on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter and Pinterest.

Spill the mount-tea

Canada's Drag Race 3, Canada’s Drag Race, Guess Who's Coming to Dinner

Take a deep breath, fellow queers, because we’re about to hit peak Drag Race season. I mean, but four score and seven years ago, we would have one season a year and a ten month off season. Now? Oh baby, there is no off season.

And. I. Love. It.

And while that isn’t the night the lights went out in Georgia – that lip sync, right? – it is the very long winded way of saying that once again we’re going (true) north (strong and fierce) with Brooke and Co. for another round of Canada’s Drag Race.

Whoever joins Priyanka and Icesis in the winner’s circle, we can rest easy knowing that this season will likely go down as having the best collection of stereotypical drag names in the history of the universe. And sometimes that is enough.

Who will take out the crown? Well, I’m hoping for Irma Gerd. As she has far and away the best bloody name. And for the unlucky first boot, check back next week for the culinary comfort.

Image source: Crave.


As you can probably tell, we are very social but the fun isn’t only limited to celebrities! You can follow us on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter and Pinterest.

Ho Canada!

Canada’s Drag Race, Canada’s Drag Race 2, Guess Who's Coming to Dinner

Once again, the gay Gods are keeping us fed as yet another franchise returns to our screens in the form of Canada’s Drag Race.

Remember those quaint early years when there was such a thing as an off season?

While we’re tragically losing Queen Stacey McKenzie and zaddy Jeffrey from the panel, I have faith that Brooke will still be able to serve us another season of the meatiest Canadian bacon ever.

So strap in or on, whatever you’d prefer, and get ready to be dazzled by the lights of the north. Hopefully with even more denim, Celine, poutine and the Pit Crew most likely to flood my basement and leave me dripping.

Check back next week as we’re joined by the first queen to get the boot.

Image source: Crave.


As you can probably tell, we are very social but the fun isn’t only limited to celebrities! You can follow us on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest and Tumblr.