Sticky Meatball Scarlettuce Cups

Main, RuPaul’s Drag Race Down Under, RuPaul’s Drag Race Down Under 1, TV, TV Recap

Like Art before her, I’m not going to dwell too much on Scarlet. I mean, damn Ru, why you gotta have four people left in contention for the crown? It really makes my life that much more difficult.

In any event, Scarlet well and truly stormed through the competition, served killer looks and well, that pole dancing was damn impressive.

That being said, it would be remiss to not say that her well-known past performances were horrible and as a white man, it is not my place to forgive her or accept her apologies. But I do hope that she is genuine about making amends and learning from the this because the world needs growth and healing with those she hurt so stupid, racist shit just stops happening.

Which is what I told her as I sat down and slammed a plate of Sticky Meatball Scarlettuce Cups in front of her.

Like at the end of a good night, there is nothing I love more than sweetly, sticky balls. Combining san choy bow and ramen influences, these babies are earthy, spiced and most importantly, easy. Which is what I like to hear when I’ve got sticky balls.


Sticky Meatball Scarlettuce Cups
Serves: 4.

500g beef mince
1 tbsp ginger, minced
4 garlic cloves, minced
1 tbsp chilli paste
225g water chestnuts, finely chopped
⅔ cup panko breadcrumbs
4 shallots, thinly sliced
salt and pepper, to taste
olive oil
⅔ cup plum sauce
100g vermicelli noodles
1 red chilli, thinly sliced
2 baby cos lettuce, leaves broken off and rinsed.

Combine the mince, ginger, garlic, chilli, water chestnuts, breadcrumbs and shallots with a good whack of salt and pepper. Scrunch to combine with your hands and mix into golf-ball sized meatballs.

Heat a lug of oil in a wok over medium heat and cook the balls for five minutes or so, tossing infrequently. Add the plum sauce with a cup of water, stir to combine and bring to a simmer. Reduce heat to low and simmer until thick and sticky. My two favourite descriptors.

Cook the noodles as per packet instructions and drain well to avoid any drippiness.

To assemble, divide a couple of lettuce leaves on a plate, top with noodles and meatballs and garlic with a few slices of chilli. And then, obviously, devour.

As you can probably tell, we are very social but the fun isn’t only limited to celebrities! You can follow us on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest and Tumblr.

Bruce Springsteen Roll

Main, Party Food, Snack

There is nothing quite as joyous and beautiful as catching up with your best friend; while it has been about five years since we last saw Brucey, it felt like no time had passed at all!

After meeting Bruce aka Brucey, Steeny, Springo or pal, in school our bond seemed unbreakable, with he and Annelie touring the bar circuit of New Jersey while I did everything in my power to bring down their rivals via torrid affairs.

While I was successful in ruining many a career on the way to Bruce’s success (without Bruce knowing, he enjoyed competition), our relationship hit a rough patch in 1984 when he invited (then) two-bit floozy Courteney Cox (we are friends, now) up on stage during his film-clip for Dancing in the Dark.

As you would expect, I ran straight to the tabloids to punish him for this indiscretion resulting in an eight-year feud and a string of voodoo and/or arson attempts near the Jersey shorelines.

Wanting to make amends after a stint in rehab, as well as the completion of a court-ordered anger management course, I reached out to Bruce and once again became his muse … eventually leading to an Academy Award for the song The Streets of Philadelphia.

We pulled up to the airport to pick-up Bruce to see him standing out front looking all dreamy, like the cover of Born on the USA – I mean, we would have taken him home and fought to the death for him, even if he wasn’t our friend.

I don’t know what it is about reminiscing about school, but it is something that definitely needs liquor, which in turns means you need drinking snacks at the ready – obviously our delicious Bruce Springsteen Rolls made the menu!


Bruce Springsteen Roll_1


These little snacks pack the right amount of sweetness and spice and are the perfect accompaniment for an afternoon of being serenaded by your close friend over a beer.



Bruce Springsteen Roll_2


Bruce Springsteen Roll
Serves: 50.

1 tbsp soy sauce
1 tsp sake
2 tbsp oyster sauce
freshly ground black pepper
1 tsp cornflour
2 tbsp cooking oil, aka anything with a low smoke-point
2 cloves garlic, finely minced
1 tsp grated fresh ginger
3 shallots, finely sliced
2 carrots, grated
½ head of chinese cabbage, shredded
1 red chilli, finely sliced
100g shitake mushrooms, finely sliced
500g chicken mince
50g vermicelli noodles, soaked in water and drained
3 tbsp toasted peanuts, crushed
1 tbsp five spice powder
50 spring roll wrappers, defrosted
extra cooking oil, for brushing

Combine the soy, sake, oyster sauce, pepper and the teaspoon of cornflour in a measuring jug; leave aside.

Heat a large pan over high heat, adding in the oil and swirling when hot. Quickly add the shallots, garlic and ginger and toss for 30 seconds, taking care not to burn them. Stirring well, add in the carrots, cabbage, chilli and mushroom, before reducing the heat to medium-high. Stir fry the vegetables for 2 minutes, or until the carrots have softened.

Remove cooked vegetables to a dish and add the chicken mince to the pan, breaking up the meat as you brown it. When the chicken is done, add the soy liquid, noodles and vegetables to the pan and combine. Remove from heat and allow to cool. When cooled, drain out any liquid.

Preheat oven to 180C and line two baking sheets.

Open the packet of spring roll wrappers, covering with a just damp towel to prevent drying out. Pour some cold water into a glass for brushing.

Place a wrapper out on the bench, add a tablespoon of the mixture in the middle at one end in a cigar shape. Roll wrapper over to cover the filling, fold both sides in and roll the spring roll up (this video has another wrapping technique, if I make no sense). Brush with water and place on baking sheet, covering with another just damp cloth.

Repeat the process until you run out of wrappers or filling.

Once done, remove the cloth, brush all of the rolls with oil and bake for 15-20 minutes, or until golden and crisp.

Devour with your favourite condiment, trying to avoid flinging sriracha all over your kitchen when shaking the bottle. Unless these are for a Halloween party in which case, boom, instant bloodbath decoration!


As you can probably tell, we are very social but the fun isn’t only limited to celebrities! You can follow us on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, Tumblr and Google+.

Lil’ San Choy Bow Wow


Our decision to rank the importance of this year’s celebrity catch-ups was (another) stroke of genius! Bow Wow (he will never be Shad to us, his closest friends), as always, was charming, funny and a straight up pleasure to be around.

Fresh from hanging with my (unwitting) ex JVDB and Annelie’s frenemey, Academy-Award nominee (and spoiler alert, soon to be winner) Patricia Arquette on the set of CSI: Something-not-starring-Caruso, Lil’ was able to fill us in on all the haps of the awards season and tinseltown.

Sadly, he couldn’t confirm whether JVDB talks about me. I assume he does though?

We also got to work on project Bring down Lipdicki 2015 over a celebratory lettuce-cup of Lil’ San Choy Bow-Wow.


Lil San Choy Bow Wow 1


 The heat and spice were perfect for the horrific Queensland summer we are experiencing and were able to open our minds to a new, exciting avenue for revenge, faux-kindness.

On that note we’ll probably see Lipnicki soon. In the meantime, enjoy!


Lil San Choy Bow Wow 2


Lil’ San Choy Bow-Wow
Serves: 4, hunger dependant.

1 iceberg lettuce
1 medium carrot, peeled
4 tbsp vegetable oil
½ red onion, sliced
2 stalks celery, finely diced
Thumb(ish) sized piece of ginger, finely sliced
3 cloves garlic, finely sliced
10 fresh shiitake mushrooms, finely sliced
1 x 230g tin water chestnuts, chopped
500g pork mince
1 tbsp palm sugar (raw would do in a pinch)
2 tbsp soy
3 tbsp oyster sauce
1 tsp sesame oil
3 tbsp Shao Hsing rice wine (dry sherry works in a pinch)
6 spring onions, finely sliced on the angle
2 large red chillies, cut on the angle
1 bunch coriander, leaves picked
½ cup crushed peanuts
sriracha hot sauce or hoisin, to serve

Trim the lettuce to create cups and soak the lettuce cups in cold water in the fridge to ensure the leaves are crisp. Grate the carrot and set aside.

Heat wok or pan over a high heat. Add the oil, onion, celery, ginger and garlic and cook for 20 seconds, then add the carrot and mushrooms, cooking for another 10 seconds.

Add the pork mince and fry, breaking it up with a wooden spoon, for approximately 2-3 minutes.

Add the sugar, soy, oyster sauce, sesame oil and rice wine and cook for another 30 seconds, before adding half the spring onions, half the chilli and half the coriander and give it all a good stir. Remove from heat.

Divide the pork mince mixture between the lettuce cups and garnish with the remaining spring onion, chilli, coriander and peanuts.