Survivor 45

Drew Bastachio & Plum Danish

Baking, Dessert, Snack, Survivor, Survivor 45, Sweets, TV, TV Recap

Previously on Survivor Austin and Dee were slowly but surely falling in love, forming an unbreakable alliance in the process alongside their fellow Rebas. When Drew decided it was time to get rid of Julie, he told Austin, reiterating that Dee can’t find out in the process. Obviously he told her, given he is smitten, and she immediately told Julie, directing Julie to play the idol she stole from Austin to get out Emily. And while Julie was tempted to take a shot at someone else and solidify her game, she ultimately stuck to her bestie Dee’s plan and eliminated Drew’s second bestie and our queen, Emily.

Back at camp everyone was awkward AF until Katurah congratulated Julie for saving herself. Julie meanwhile was trying to contain her excitement, though pretending to be annoyed at Dee for ‘blindsiding’ her to keep their closeness hidden. Austin meanwhile was glad that he didn’t have to waste his amulet, meaning he has guaranteed safe this episode. So swoon. Dee on the other hand was giving an Oscar winning performance, pretending to be gutted that Julie played her idol and was now worried she would now be Julie’s target. Dee and Austin caught up, with her assuring him she never told Julie, before they locked in a final three alliance. Drew dropped by, happily believing Julie’s reads are on point and that somebody’s acting wasn’t. Julie then arrived and made things awkward, questioning when they gave up on the Reba 4 and while it was cute, Drew couldn’t even look her in the eye. So goodbye Drew, I guess?

The next day Katurah got up early to make a start on finding the replaced idol to block Julie from getting it. Sadly for her, Dee and Austin realised she was awake and as such got hunting themselves. And while she didn’t find an idol, Austin found her and made things super awkward. Despite her explaining she was just trying to make sure Julie couldn’t find anything, he cautioned that spooking Julie could lead to her hunting even harder. Everyone returned to camp with Drew and Julie catching up to clear the air, as Drew pretended Reba 4 making it to the end is still viable, while she pointed out that she just doesn’t know how to trust him. Drew, on the other hand, told us that he is just swallowing his rage and still plans to get rid of her next. After delivering Drew back to camp, Julie asked to talk to Dee and both of them acted angry as they scurried away from camp before they started laughing at how well they managed to pull off the blindside. Dee laughed about swearing on everyone in her life and how she is still close with everyone, assuring Julie that Drew is the one coming for her and as such, they need to rally new numbers to get rid of him. Immediately.

The tribe met up with Probst for an epic reward challenge where they would race from the ocean and then barrel roll through a course to collect keys which they use to unlock a slide puzzle. With the first person to win scoring an epic picnic on a sandspit in the middle of the ocean. Which they will arrive at by helicopter. Austin powered out to an early lead with everyone nipping at his heels to varying degrees of success. Drew was first to close the gap, leaving the besties to fight it out on the puzzle, as everyone slowly made their way to fighting with them. Before Austin solved the puzzle out of nowhere and snatched reward. Obviously Probst asked him to select a friend to go with him, opting for Dee before Probst gave him one other person, which was Katurah, to keep Drew and Julie back at camp to guarantee nobody starts throwing out his name. Given they’re focused on getting each other out.

Back at camp, the world’s most awkward throuple popped on a pot of rice and lamented how shitty it was to miss out. Even though they all understand why Austin didn’t choose them. Julie awkwardly told Drew she could go grab some peppers with Jake to make sure Drew’s babysitting isn’t ruined. As Drew tossed the lid of the pot into the shore, the duo were busy hunting for idols and causing chaos and yeah, I love that for them. As they returned to the shelter, the helicopter did a flyby to prove they weren’t on reward, with Drew continuing to be salty.

On the helicopter, the trio were giddily enjoying the ride as Katurah realised she was third wheeling as Dee and Austin held hands and rubbed knees, and ugh, it was sweet and I love this story and am a little shocked it took so long for us to get here. Was the love story happening from the first episode? I want to know and I want them to get married, Boston Rob and Amber style. Just as they decreed. I mean, the supercut of the two of them blushing, talking about how much they love each other was adorbs, and I love love, ok?

Back at camp Drew was still miserable as they finally got to work cooking the rice, as Jake pretended to be going to get changed so he could hunt for an idol. Sadly for him, he found something, however it was just a clue. Directing him to find the idol in a secret compartment of the raft. He then stripped down to his underwear to keep his story up as he finally grabbed the idol, vowing to leverage it to earn him votes at the final tribal council.

The tribe came together with Probst for the latest immunity challenge where they would use a leg to balance a ball on a long paddle, with the last one standing guaranteeing themselves a spot in the final five. And given the paddle has a lip, I honestly don’t see how this is that difficult. And as soon as I wrote that, Julie and Jake dropped back to back within minutes. Katurah was next to go, followed by Drew after an epic save around the seven minute mark, leaving Dee and Austin to battle it out. With the lovebirds being shady about how easy they are finding the challenge. After surpassing the dreamteam’s winning time of 21 minutes, Austin started to wobble and dropped while Dee just did not move, earning herself immunity as Austin hobbled over to congratulate his girlfriend.

Back at camp the tribe congratulated Dee on her epic victory as the lovebirds joked about being desperate to beat each other in every challenge. As Julie wandered off, Drew and Austin locked in Jake and Katurah on the Julie vote. Sadly for the boys, Jake knew he needed to do something bigger if he wants to win and as such, pulled Julie aside to float a Drew blindside instead. Which she was obviously thrilled about. Julie knew that Dee would also be down to write Drew too, though had to pretend it would be a harder sell to get majority. Jake quickly looped in Katurah who was down and while Katurah was confident she could convince Dee to join them, Jake didn’t want to get her onboard until after a tie, so she can’t claim the move as her own. Sadly for him, however, Katurah went to Dee and suggested that she would love to get rid of Drew giving her yet another feather in her cap.

Dee then pulled Drew aside to talk about how cleanly the merge has gone for him, loving how closely he and Austin have worked together, looking towards greats like JT and Stephen, and Tyson and Gervase. As he hoped it would all stay together so they can make it to the end. Dee and Austin caught up by the shore, with Dee worried about whether she should loop him in on the blindside, given he could easily play his idol for Drew and pull off the move she did just last week. Leaving her to battle between her head and her heart.

At tribal council Austin spoke about how grateful he was to not get much blowback for picking Katurah to go on reward and leave the kids to babysit. Julie joked about her kids turning on her, while Katurah spoke about how well the tribe are compartmentalising given they like each other but are all fighting hard to win. Drew and Dee spoke about how the relationships are also making things more difficult, as everyone is also lying to each other. Drew meanwhile shared that if he makes it through tonight, he feels like he has a very clear path to the end. Which Julie pointed out was a blessing, given she can’t even see how she could possibly get to the four let alone three. Before Drew gave a lovely analogy about how difficult Julie’s path is to the end, while Julie made a plea for everyone to play smart. Talk turned to how people are now thinking about who they want to face at the end, with Dee admitting she has a plan but knows that it is unlikely for anyone to get the exact final three they’re hoping for.

With that the tribe voted, Austin played his idol for himself and his closest ally not called Dee, Drew found himself blindsided from the game. As Austin looked on at Dee, heartbroken. Before we could find out whether it was the end of my favourite lovers, I ventured to Ponderosa to try and cheer up Drew because he was, in a word, pissed. Super pissed. I tried to pull him in for a hug to assure him that going out just before the finale is generally better to being cut first in the finale, however given he was so confident in his path forward, he wasn’t having it. That is until he had a Drew Bastachio & Plum Danish or five.

The earthy pistachio and tart, juicy plums work perfectly to counteract the crisp, fresh pastry. Flavourful, decadent and melt in your mouth, these danishes have the power to turn around even the worst of moods.

Enjoy!

Drew Bastachio & Plum Danish
Serves: 4-8.

Ingredients
250g pistachios
250g unsalted butter, at room temperature
250g raw caster sugar
2 tsp vanilla extract
2 eggs
2 sheets good-quality butter puff pastry, quartered
8 davidson plums, pitted and sliced

Method
Preheat the oven to 200ºC. Pop the nuts on a baking tray and toast in the oven for 5-10 minutes. Remove from the oven and allow to cool (though leave the oven on).

Once the nuts have cooled a little, pop 200g of them in a food processor and blitz until they have formed a meal-like consistency and no further. Add the butter, sugar, vanilla and eggs and blitz until well combined.

To assemble, cut the squares of pastry into circles, spoon a dollop of the pistachio mixture in the middle and top with some plum, leaving a 2cm rim around the edge. Roughly chop the remaining nuts and sprinkle over the top. Pop in the oven and bake for twenty minutes, or until golden, puffed and crisp. Then, obviously, devour.


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Chickemily Flippenne in Parmesan Cream Sauce

Main, Pasta, Poultry, Survivor, Survivor 45, TV, TV Recap

Previously on Survivor Austin handed his idol off to Julie ahead of a team immunity challenge, unsure what weird variation of tribal council could screw his ally out of the game. Thankfully it was all for nought as Jeff opted against too much chaos, allowing the Rebas to take control of the tribe. After Emily jagged a reward and took the ladies for an overnight vacay, they locked in a plan to blindside Bruce should he not win immunity. The only catch being his pesky idol. As such, they got to work convincing him he was safe and that Mama J – aka Julie – was the true target as she was such a massive threat to win. After Austin took out immunity, Emily worked overtime on Bruce to the point I wasn’t actually sure what the plan was until everyone banded together and blindsided Bruce with an idol in his pocket.

Back at camp the tribe were thrilled to have pulled off an epic blindside. None more so than Katurah, who was giddy to have finally felled her lecturing, micro-managing nemesis. Julie meanwhile was shocked that she was the one he voted for, given ironically, she was the only one willing to work with him. Emily jumped in to provide context, pointing out she went to Bruce and told him that Julie was playing him and that she was happy to join him to blindside her to protect him, which is the actual reason he never played his idol. And while everyone was shocked and excited to hear how detailed her plan was, Julie grew wary of just how threatening Emily could prove to be.

After everyone went to sleep, the Reba 4 caught up by the shore, congratulating each other for officially taking control before promptly locking in an official final four. Julie and Drew then went back to camp, leaving Austin and Dee to flirt and be all cute as they watched the stars and yeah, I ship them. As they likened themselves to Boston Rob and Amber (kinda), and ugh, I love love. But given they vowed to take each other to the final three, you know someone random is winning the final immunity challenge and they will be the duo facing off in fire for the final spot. Mark. My. Words.

The next day Jake continued to feel left out, hoping that the seven votes he has received thus far will be it for the game. Meaning he will be a zero vote finalist. Mark those words too. He and Katurah caught up, locking in an alliance to go to the end, no doubt because Katurah can already tell that he wouldn’t get votes at the end. Jake opened up about being a lawyer, encouraging Katurah and telling her she could be a lawyer herself, if she wanted. After Julie joined them, Katurah felt compelled to share her story and while she didn’t admit to being a lawyer, she spoke about her harrowing childhood, being pulled out of school at 10 after her family joined a cult and that she missed years, before her mum pulled them out of the cult when she was earmarked as the leaders next wife. And then she worked her arse off to catch up and continued to thrive until she achieved her dreams to fight for other black women.

And yeah, you know I am rooting hard for Katurah now.

A boat then arrived at camp offering a journey for one, with everyone wanting to go, meaning they had to draw rocks. With Emily, the most reluctant, the one to win the trip. As she departed, Julie and Drew spoke about Emily slowly building her resume and being a threat. Julie then suggested that maybe now would be the time to get rid of her, which Drew quickly shut down. Making Julie nervous as she noticed him getting more and more suspicious. Julie and Dee caught up, with the latter agreeing that Drew is the one she is most suspicious of. Particularly since he is close with Emily, and they just can’t trust that she will tell the truth about what happens on her journey.

Speaking of which, Emily arrived at Journey Island where she wandered the shore and discovered the ring puzzle that four people failed at earlier this season. However she was too scared about not having her vote at seven, so bounced, despite knowing everyone would be back at camp talking about targeting her.

Katurah and Jake were busy practising fire with Drew, who wanted to know who they would be willing to go to the end with. And while they were coy, Katurah agreed that she just doesn’t think she could beat Julie or Dee. Leading to Drew, eventually, getting them to agree that getting rid of Julie should be their absolute priority. Katurah then wandered off and caught up with Austin, pointing out that she isn’t really sure who she wants to go to the end with, but she does already know who she doesn’t want to go with: Julie. With Austin quickly and calmly agreeing that she is right, particularly since she wanted to get Julie out, followed by Emily. Not his girlfriend. Austin then caught up with Drew to see what he was thinking, with Drew working hard to convince him that getting rid of Julie should be the priority, given she isn’t even willing to return his idol.

Emily returned to camp, talking everyone through the experience in full, honest detail. Which obviously meant Dee and Julie didn’t buy it. Emily went for a walk, with Drew following to let her know that Julie is well and truly out to get her. Leaving the duo to go person to person to rally the troops against each other. 

Jeffrey finally made an appearance for this week’s immunity challenge where they would have to unravel rope that they would be tethered to, then race through a series of obstacles, toss sandbags at blocks and then use the blocks to solve a rainbow puzzle. Oh and the winner would get an epic BBQ reward for them back at camp. Jake was first to make a start before quickly realising he didn’t have enough rope, allowing Drew to power ahead as the rest of the tribe struggled. Austin closed the gap and it became a battle as the boys tried to figure out the puzzle. With Drew eventually figuring out how to make it work on both sides, handing himself immunity. As he channelled Michelle and kicked shit, just for funsies. You know Probst then offered Drew the chance to share his BBQ with someone, opting to take Jake given they haven’t had a reward. And then Austin, to keep guys’ night alive.

Back at camp the girls went off to luxuriate in the ocean and read up on the history of buffs, given they are all planning to target either Julie and Emily. Eventually Dee suggested they vote out Jake just to make things less awkward. We then caught up with the boys who were smashing their burgies and TBH, it truly did look lovely. They then debated the merits of getting rid of Julie or Emily and while Jake didn’t exactly trust anyone, he did trust that they needed him this round and as such, happily jumped on board the Julie vote. Agreeing to keep Dee out of the loop as long as possible to reduce the chances of her playing the idol.

They came back together where the guilt started to play on Austin as he worried about telling Dee. As such, they went for a walk together along the shore with Dee sharing she is locked to get rid of Emily, before Austin casually, awkwardly, shared that there is currently a growing movement against Julie. Which Dee obviously hated, though she tried to hide it, given she didn’t want her emotions getting the best of her. After thinking on it, she figured trusting her heart has proven successful thus far, so caught up with Julie at the shelter and told her to play her idol tonight. Julie then caught up with Jake and Emily to suggest the plan was one of the girls, though she would happily make a move against Austin if they wanted. After Julie went for a walk, Emily told Julie that she is trying to rally the troops against Austin, which resulted in all of them descending into chaos. As Drew and Austin bickered about whether Dee spilled the beans and Dee tried to talk Julie out of targeting Austin and to stick to the plan to blindside Emily.

At tribal council Drew and Julie spoke about how the game gets easy as it goes along, given everyone becomes more and more desensitised to blindsiding people. Katurah spoke about the fact you need to successfully compartmentalise, while Emily pointed out that everyone has full bags with them tonight as nobody can trust they will be safe. Drew tried to be cagey before unleashing about how they are in a new page of history, a wanky way of saying they are thinking who they want to face off against in the final three. Julie and Emily spoke about how they have tried to steel their emotions as they planned to vote out someone they love, with Austin agreeing it has come to the point of having to simply figure out who’s motives align with yours. While Katurah admitted she was scared about the chance of an idol, given everyone played their cards so close to their chest.

With that the tribe voted as everyone – including Dee, as per the plan – voted for Julie, before she played Austin’s gifted idol in a very showy move, sending Emily out of the game with a single, solitary vote. Emily found her way to Ponderosa by following my screaming tears, before pulling me in for a massive hug and assuring me she would be fine. Sadly for her, it didn’t pacify me, as I screamed that I would not be. After 40 minutes of heaving sobs though, I finally realised I will be fine because Emily is one of the breakout stars of the new era and as such, will return multiple times over the years and will likely win on her second outing. And until then, we’ll always have Chickemily Flippenne in Parmesan Cream Sauce.

This is one of those perfect soothing dishes for the end of the year when we’re all limping to a break. Rich and creamy, with a sweet punch of tomato, this all works in harmony to fill your stomach and warm hearts. Just like Emily throughout the season.

Enjoy!

Chickemily Flippenne in Parmesan Cream Sauce
Serves: 6.

Ingredients
500g penne
1 tbsp olive oil
2 chicken breasts, diced
1 cup button mushrooms, thinly sliced
4 garlic cloves, minced
1 cup sundried tomatoes, drained and roughly chopped
1 tsp Italian seasoning
1 tbsp unsalted butter
1 tbsp flour
2 cups cream
1 cup parmesan cheese, grated
2 cups baby spinach, washed
salt and pepper, to taste

Method
Bring a pot of salted water to the boil and cook the pasta per the cooking instructions, minus a minute. Drain, run under cool water and to rest.

Heat the olive oil in a large skillet over medium heat and cook the chicken, stirring, for five minutes or so, or until cooked through. Add the mushrooms, garlic, sundried tomato and Italian seasoning, cooking until fragrant and the mushrooms are soft. Add the butter and flour and cook for a further couple of minutes before stirring in the cream. Bring to a near-boil, reduce to low and stir in the parmesan until smooth. Finally stir in the baby spinach and cook until wilted. Remove from the heat.

Once the pasta is ready, stir through the sauce, season and serve. Then add a little more parmesan and devour, like a boss. Ideally with a glass of confessional wine.


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Lemon Chicken Bruce Perrissoles

Main, Poultry, Survivor, Survivor 45, TV, TV Recap

Previously on Survivor the Reba alliance were slowly but surely eliminating the threats to their final four dreams. Kendra meanwhile was feeling heartbroken to have lost her bestie Kellie due to Bruce taking out immunity. Though was assured he was still the target. Obviously that meant that he took out yet another win. At reward, Julie, Kendra and Bruce locked in a plan to get rid of Jake instead. Back at camp Emily was also keen to take out Jake, however Dee had other plans. Given Kendra was out to get her, she realised she had to take a shot to save herself, so yet again, convinced her alliance to flip the vote and take our the premiere the Drew Barrymore impressionist, Kendra.

Back at camp Jake was once again gagged to still in the game, though decided that given he is still here, he now must also have allies in the game. Which isn’t really the case. He, Drew and Emily meanwhile were busy talking about getting rid of Bruce, or at the very least, flushing his idol ASAP. Meaning one of those things is happening today, given subtlety isn’t really a thing for the modern Survivor editors.

The next day everyone was thrilled to have a lovely little sleep, except for Julie, who was starting to feel wracked with guilt after blindsiding Kellie and Kendra back-to-back. She started to break down, feeling like her betrayals are really cutting people to their core and while she is happy to play that maternal role, she isn’t loving the way it is exacerbating her betrayals. As they assured each other it was only a game, Katurah, Bruce and Emily were catching up about how much of a threat the Reba 4 are, with Emily starting to realise the boys may not be as loyal to her as she thinks. The problem being Bruce, Katurah and Jake can’t work together, and Bruce doesn’t realise the power of playing his idol to flip the game, rather than just saving himself once. 

I was then instantly proven wrong as Bruce went on a tour testing whether he could successfully act like he gave Kellie his idol before her blindside to avoid a potential Knowledge is Power play, so now is without an idol. In the hope Jake would leak to the Rebas and he could have a showy move.

The tribe caught up with Jeff for the latest reward challenge where they would run through an obstacle course before guiding a ball through a table maze. For a trip to the Sanctuary for a Thanksgiving feast – essentially – and an overnight sleep in a bed. Austin, Bruce, Dee and Jake got out to an early lead, though TBH, everyone was pretty neck and neck up until the table maze. Where everyone dropped over and over again until Austin and Emily got their eye in, with Queen Emily jagging victory. Like an icon. She immediately burst into tears, sharing that everyone was kindly offering to take her to the Sanctuary given she hasn’t been, so to be able to get to go because of her own victory meant the world to her. Jeff then announced she would also get letters from home on reward, picking Julie to join her given she is clearly struggling. As is Probst’s way, he told her another person could come, opting for Katurah. And then Dee, going for a ladies night.

We followed the gals out as they joyfully sat down for their epic feast, praising the hell out of each other and ugh, I love to see it. As do I love Emily’s confessional, sitting there with a wine like an icon. They assured each other that a woman will be the winner of the season, with the group agreeing Bruce needs to go to help them keep winning. They then locked in a split vote between Bruce and Jake in the hope of getting rid of Bruce for Katurah’s delicious revenge. While Katurah dunked on Bruce for trying to pretend his idol went out with Kellie.

Back at camp the guys were busy being guys, allegedly, farting and burping and TBH, I loved the soundtrack if nothing else. While Drew was delighting in finally being able to bro out, rather than watch from the sidelines. While Austin was thrilled to feast on meat. Of the fish he caught, rather than what I’d love to watch. As Austin was busy fishing, Bruce and Jake meanwhile were trying to pick a target, with Bruce pointing out they need Dee gone ASAP. Jake, meanwhile, was hitching his wagon to the Rebas, going to Drew to warn him about the plan and the fact Bruce lost his idol with the Kellie blindside. Which absolutely delighted Austin and Drew. And will in turn delight us when they hilariously learn it is a lie.

We checked back in on the gals where they finally opened their letters and broke down in tears as their loved ones spoke about how proud of them they are. Emily was ready to maybe get married, while Katurah started to sob, as she found a letter from her mother, who she had decided to cut off about a year ago.

The next day the tribe came together, with Drew telling Emily about the situation with Bruce’s idol. Before Emily instantly assured him Bruce doesn’t have an idol and Jake was fed a lie. Knowing everyone treats Jake like a pawn, Emily tried to win him over, pointing out that he is the back-up target and that everyone is against him. As such, he then decided to throw out Drew as an option instead. Obviously Julie took it to Drew, who immediately confronted Jake and let’s just say, he was not thrilled to hear his name. And while Drew tried to talk it through, Jake told him it was over and well, it was hilariously iconic.

The tribe met Probst in the middle of the ocean where they would each lie on a ramp over the water, holding themselves up on tiny handholds, with the last person standing taking out immunity. Almost instantly Emily dropped before Katurah struggled with the thought of falling into the water, stepping off to avoid the surprise. Everyone transitioned to a lower handhold, which cost Julie her spot. They moved down to the smallest handhold and had to put their legs out straight for the rest of the challenge, with Dee dropping instantly, followed by Drew and Jake, leaving Austin and Bruce to battle it out. At least for another couple of minutes, before Bruce dropped, handing Austin immunity. As everyone screamed and cheered. Probst then announced they could bring the boat in for Katurah if she is too scared to swim out, however everyone rallied around her and helped her over and ugh, it was beautiful and I love Probst for manufacturing it.

Back at camp Bruce quickly assured us and the tribe that he would be playing his idol, with the ricochet going home. As everyone assured him that it would then mean Jake is going home. Katurah and Emily were discussing how it is unlikely that Jake would win the game however, while Julie is highly likely to score the votes and as such, decided they need to get rid of her ASAP. Emily ventured off to loop in Bruce, before we learnt this may just be a plan to get him to not play an idol. Bruce then caught up with Jake, with the duo realising getting rid of Julie was the only way to guarantee the former Belos make it to the end, however given he has been played week after week, Jake just wasn’t sure who to trust. As he broke down in tears, Katurah checked in to see if he was ok, assuring him that she has his back and to just relax. Bruce then arrived and gave him a peptalk and ugh, it was super sweet to see. And now I love Bruce.

Speaking of Bruce, he was nervous about the plan coming together, given Jake was starting to spiral. Unaware that Emily is gleefully playing him just to avoid an idol play.

At tribal council everyone spoke about the difference in the energy, given Bruce is no longer immune. Bruce admitted it made him nervous, though calmly threatened that he would be playing his idol. Jake meanwhile was happy to have been involved in discussions lately, though he still feared being left out. As it makes him feel dumb. Austin and Julie tried to make him feel better, with Julie then opening up about the extra burden that comes to her being christened the mama, as people are more likely to feel betrayed by her. Drew spoke about tonight feeling different, given they are far more ambiguous about the game they’re all playing, the closer it gets to the end. While Katurah, Emily and Jake spoke about it being harder to make a move as the numbers dwindled. Julie meanwhile was confident she won’t be going home, while everyone agreed an idol is likely to be played tonight. As they giggled about the fact Bruce may not even play it.

With that the tribe voted and Bruce ultimately held onto his idol for another day, which turned out to be a huge mistake, as three votes piled up on Jake, one on Julie and the rest on Bruce, blindsiding him with the idol in his pocket. And kill off his other day. As he walked in to Ponderosa, I hid and did some slapstick humour, which is Bruce and my love language. He then pulled me in for a massive hug and thanked me for being on hand to cheer him up. I assured him that his personality is definitely not too much and that he isn’t overbearing, so to embrace who he is because that is perfect. Yeah, totally out of character for me, but Bruce is an absolute delight and deserves a little love. In the form of my Lemon Chicken Bruce Perrissoles.

There is nothing I love more than a little bit of lemon and chicken, and this easy rissoles are truly a perfect pairing. A punch of chilli, the tange of lemon and the smooth, sweet parmesan, they are an absolute delight. Like Bruce.

Enjoy!

Lemon Chicken Bruce Perrissoles
Serves: 4.

Ingredients
1kg chicken mince
5 garlic cloves, minced
1 lemon, zested
1 egg
1 cup panko breadcrumbs
1 tbsp cumin
1 tsp chilli flakes
¼ cup mint, roughly chopped
2 tbsp parmesan cheese, grated
kosher salt and pepper, to taste
olive oil

Method
Combine the mince, garlic, zest, egg, breadcrumbs, cumin, chilli, mint, parmesan and a good whack of salt and pepper in a large bowl, scrunching to combine but not overworking. Divide the patties into 8 rissoles using wet hands and pop on a lined plate, cover and chill for half an hour.

When the patties have set, heat a lug of oil in a skillet over medium heat and cook the rissoles in batches of four for 5 minutes each side. Or until golden and cooked through. Then devour.


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Kendra McQucranberrie Sauce

Condiment, Sauce, Survivor, Survivor 45, TV, TV Recap

Previously on Survivor the final pre-merge journey continued to loom over the season as Austin smarted over being robbed of a sandwich by J. Maya and Kellie, who wanted advantages. We were also reminded that Bruce found an idol, just before leaving Lulu beach. Which came into play in the present, as Kellie was worried about Bruce’s idol potentially leading to her copping strays, given he was telling everyone they were tightly aligned. Everyone wanted to lock in a Bruce blindside however he won immunity, which quickly led to everyone flipping to take out Jake instead. Given this is new era Survivor, however, the Rebas chose they couldn’t trust Jake to not have a bag of tricks and flipped the vote to Kellie instead. And she was angry. While Austin now had a second idol.

Back at camp Kendra was heartbroken to be without her bestie (not Bruce’s), sadly cheersing the dark sea all alone. While by the shelter Jake was loudly celebrating and laughing about still being in the game. Despite the joy, he realised he had zero idea what was going on at camp and knew he needed to pivot. Hard. Bruce meanwhile was salty about his closest ally being taken out, assuming it meant he was the original target. The Rebas, however, told him the actual (fake) reason they booted her is because she actually wanted to take out Bruce. Dee and Austin explained that she felt he was overbearing and TBH, you could see the exact moment his heart broke. Katurah and Kendra meanwhile were heartbroken to have lost their actual bestie, though Kendra realised Kellie was a threat and would also vote for her if she makes it to the end, so she wasn’t that mad. Though she was now keen to come for Dee. Katurah took this information to the Rebas in the hope she could be pulled into their alliance, with everyone now trying to decide if Jake or Kendra is the best person to target while flushing Bruce’s idol.

The next day Bruce was still hurt by the news Kellie was after him as he sat on the beach. He returned to camp, dejected, quietly sulking by the fire as everyone tried to bring him in. He then spoke about his fear that he is overbearing with his daughter and ugh, this is actually really hard to watch, as that comment really seems to have broken him. And just like that, I love Bruce. Particularly knowing he is energetic and upbeat because he grew up in the foster care system where he always had to adapt and be positive. Drew meanwhile picked up on his energy and just decided reality got to him. Which we now know is not a nuanced read. Emily pulled Drew and Austin aside to float the idea of getting rid of Dee, just to see whether their three person alliance is the priority. However, seeing how quickly they cut it down, I think she is ready to make a move elsewhere. Despite how hard Austin tried to sell Dee as the ultimate meatshield for them.

Drew went off to collect treemail asking everyone to split into trios for the upcoming immunity challenge, though were assured only one person would win immunity. With no context about why they are trios, Dee, Drew and Jake formed one, Austin, Emily and Katurah another leaving Kendra, Julie and Bruce together. Filling Julie with dread, since she is an obvious target if just three go to tribal council, leading to Austin handing over an idol.

After they met up with Probst, they got the good news that it would still be a nine person tribal council and that their teams would just be for the first two stages of the challenge. First one being they have to retrieve discs and balance a ball on it as they walk a balance beam before digging rope rungs, last group being eliminated. Second one, they’d use the rungs to form a ladder and land three balls on small rings, the last group, again, eliminated while the final three have to balance plates against discs, with the last one standing winning immunity. Oh and the winning trio would get to go to the Sanctuary to smash a roast chicken. And the first group eliminated will also lose their vote at tribal council, though they could win theirs back on a journey.

And again, stop with the twists as there could have been a blindside with nine votes in play.

Dee, Drew and Jake got out to an early lead on round one before Jake struggled on the balance beam and put them squarely in last place. The other groups powered ahead until Bruce struggled, leaving Emily, Austin and Katurah to start digging their rungs solo. Everyone caught up as Dee, Drew and Jake powered through and made it to round two first, followed by Julie singlehanded getting her team over the line, forcing Emily, Austin and Katurah to lose their votes. While Dee, Drew and Jake got out to an early lead in round two, Bruce, Julie and Kendra made quick work of the baskets and overtook them and made it through to the final round. The trio lined up with the discs, with all of them wobbling almost instantly. After an epic struggle, Kendra eventually dropped as Bruce and Julie faced off yet again before the latter tragically dropped and handed Bruce immunity. Again.

We followed the mids back to camp where Jake, Drew and Dee opted to avoid strategising before they have information about who will actually be voting and as such, made themselves a big pot of rice. As Jake went for a wander, Dee and Drew portioned up the rice and giddily took extra, while talking about the plan ahead. With surprise, surprise, Dee wanting to get rid of Kendra. Oh and then they realised they didn’t save Jake any rice, so instead let him eat the stuff burnt on to the bottom of the pan.

Over at the Sanctuary the trio were feeling good as they smashed the chicken and kikied, with Kendra admitting she is nervous about the vote ahead. Julie lied about being on the bottom of the Reba alliance, as Kendra floated the idea of getting rid of Dee to break up her and Austin, despite the fact she believes they are in love and wants them to get married. Julie threw out Jake as an option instead and while Kendra loved hearing anyone but her, Julie was still nervous things wouldn’t play out her way and she wouldn’t be able to get her revenge.

We finally checked in with the losers on their journey as they trekked to the top of the mountain and learnt that to win their votes back, they would have to do a maths problem. And while I thought they would all be able to slay it, Emily and Katurah crumbled under the pressure while Austin jagged his vote back at the very last moment. 

Drew and Jake were talking about the confusion about the vote ahead as the groups came together back at camp. The losers announced that only none of them earned their vote back before Austin pulled his allies aside to assure them it was a lie and as such, he actually has a vote and they, a majority. So they can power ahead with a vote to get rid of Kendra. Only Julie filled them in on the fact the Sanctuary people agreed to get rid of Jake and since it was better for her game, that is what she wanted to do. Kendra meanwhile was spiralling, going to Emily to let her know that Jake was the plan tonight and when she agreed it made sense, Kendra felt great. Sadly when Drew caught up with Emily she learnt it wasn’t the case and that Kendra is actually the target. And given Dee was the one to come up with it, there were more red flags for Emily.

At tribal council Kendra spoke about how heartbroken she was to lose Kellie at the last tribal council as Kellie held back tears, Kaleb holding her hands. Dee spoke about how tough it is to play the game, given you are playing with people’s lives. Jake spoke about the shock, given he assumed to be going home and while he survived, he does hate that he is clearly at the bottom. Talk turned to Julie and Bruce being the challenge beasts, though Julie added that she would like to actually jag the win. Bruce then spoke about winning back-to-back immunities and the risk it makes him a target. Talk turned to the vote losers with Drew talking about how difficult it is to figure out a plan tonight, given they aren’t exactly sure who is voting. That made Kendra get paranoid, not realising people may have lied about getting their votes back. While Jake was just looking for a friend and willing to be used, given he is one of the guaranteed votes.

With that the tribe voted – Austin very speedily – before Kendra was gagged to be blindsided. While Jake was once again surprised to survive, almost becoming a bit of a lol that he keeps being dragged along through now power of his own. But enough about Jake, this is about the second coming of Drew Barrymore, our queen, Kendra. As she arrived at Ponderosa, I pulled her in for a massive hug and thanked her for being such a glorious bright point of the season. She was not just a light spirit, she was also a fun, quirky character and so exceedingly watchable. And I look forward to her second season. So wheeled out a vat of Kendra McQucranberrie Sauce to fuel our planning session.

Sweet, tart and spicy, this glorious sauce has it all and while it is traditionally a sauce associated with Thanksgiving, it is something you will come round year round.

Enjoy!

Kendra McQucranberrie Sauce
Serves: 8.

Ingredients
100g muscovado sugar
100ml freshly squeezed orange juice, and zest from the associated oranges
250g frozen cranberries
1 tsp cinnamon
¼ tsp allspice
a pinch of ground nutmeg

Method
Combine the sugar, orange juice and zest in a pan and bring to the boil. Once the sugar has dissolved, stir in the cranberries and simmer for 5 minutes, or until tender. Stir in the spices and cook for another couple of minutes to infuse.

Remove from the heat and allow to cool for a little before transferring to steralised jars, closing and leaving to cool completely. Then devour.


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Kellie Nalbandia Maria Chocolate Christmas Cake

Baking, Cake, Dessert, Snack, Survivor, Survivor 45, TV, TV Recap

Previously on Survivor Bruce jagged an idol moments before the first phase of the non-merge portion of the game. As the boat approached shore, he enlisted the help of everyone else in the tribe to collect it, though decided to keep it a secret from his nemesis Katurah. After they were split into two groups – why merge, you ask? Who knows – to each eliminate someone, Kaleb filled her in to make sure she wasn’t angry with him. But over to the other group where Kellie was debating when to turn on Bruce, though instead stuck with Drew and her Belos to take out Sifu. After he was sent all the way home, Katurah confronted Jake about keeping the idol secret from her. While Jake and Kaleb thought they had won her over enough to force a tie and take out Julie, Katurah banded with the Rebas to take out Kaleb to become the king of the jury.

As the first group arrived back at camp, everyone was thrilled to have made the jury. Though Drew did admit that getting rid of Sifu was harder than he thought, particularly since it gave Bruce a win in the game, which nobody wanted. When the groups came together, nobody was exactly surprised that Kaleb was gone. Though you best believe Jake felt awkward about trying to save Kaleb, given it made him an outsider. And he regretted being reckless. To his credit, he pulled Julie aside to clear the air, admitting that his vote was more to save Kaleb, not to take her out. And while they pretended to be all good, it was clear Julie was going to get revenge.

The next day the dolls noticed that they had a numbers advantage over the men and as such, thought that maybe they should form an alliance and take control. While the boys were focused on tacos, all the girls agreed it was a great idea and maybe it was finally the right time to get rid of Bruce. While Julie admitted to us that she still trusts Drew and Austin, given they all have a mutual target, maybe it could work. Kellie on the other hand just wanted the albatross around her neck gone.

A boat then arrived at shore, featuring a table with bowls glued on top. Thoroughly confused, name cards were laid out before Kendra read treemail announcing that they would be participating in the Survivor Auction. Finally, finally, giving us what we want! Of course it was going to come with a twist, the first being that they had to go find tubes of cash hidden in the jungle for them to spend. Everyone split up hunting for the money, with Bruce choosing to take it super easy, finishing with just $80 to spend at auction. While Dee and Austin were the richest with $900 and $700 apiece.

When they met Jeffrey in the jungle, he immediately announced that unlike in the past, there will be no advantages on offer. At all. And the third twist? 15 items will be up for grabs, 5 confirmed and the rest decided by rockdraw and finishing without notice. Why does that matter, though? Well the person with the most money leftover at the conclusion of the auction loses their vote at the upcoming tribal council. First up were pretzels and beer, which went to Kendra for $360, exhausting her money in the process and guaranteeing she holds on to her vote. Fries and coke went to Kellie for $500, Emily bought a covered item for $440 which was thankfully not bat soup, instead a massive charcuterie and wine. Oh and now she has $60 left, meaning she is likely keeping her vote too. Dee went all in with $900 to jag her milkshake, likely just to retain her vote.

The next covered item went to Katurah for $480. Feeling like it could be a dud, Probst offered her the chance to trade out for something else. Sadly she opted to keep the original, which were two giant fish eyeballs. Which Austin bought on resale for $100. Though at least Katurah kept her vote, no? Drew went all in on item 6 for $520, which was just a bowl of candy. Austin snatched a piece of pizza for $600. A toothbrush and mouthwash went to Julie for $420, the next item was chocolate cake for three, which went to Jake for $340 and was shared with Julie and Bruce. Kellie then bought a sandwich, chips and marg for $200, leaving Bruce to now be the richest person left on the bleachers. And sadly, there were no other items available, meaning he was the poorest going in and also lost his vote.

Back at camp everyone was giddy from the food and sugar, with Kendra talking about how great it was to burn through all her cash on the first item and just be able to chill. She then shared that the beer was special to her, as she didn’t know her biological father until she was 18 years old. When she reached out and met, they shared a beer and as such it reminded her of him and gave him a special toast. Which was super cute.

Everyone was chilling out and going for a swim, so Emily caught up with Drew and assured him that she is his ride or die. And then squealed on the girls alliance – boo – and while that sucks for us, she assured him that Jake and Bruce are the targets, so he is fine. And damn, Emily, that upsets me. Drew meanwhile was thrilled to have the information and given Bruce is everyone’s target, he, Austin and Julie approached Katurah by the well and assured her they can work together, and hey, she can even pick the target. And what do you know, she said Bruce?!

The tribe caught up with Probst for the immunity challenge, which Bruce is totally winning based on the timing, no? But back to the challenge. Everyone would need to hold onto a rope holding up a log with the last person standing without dropping winning immunity. Adding yet another wrinkle to the challenge, Jeff offered the tribe a massive bag of rice for the last ten days of the game if four people sit out. Dee and Emily instantly offered, with Katurah asking for an incentive. Which led to Probst stabbing the bag and letting rice bleed out until two more people offered, with Drew jumping straight out before Katurah eventually joined them. After 20 minutes Kellie and Kendra dropped in quick succession, before Austin and Jake dropped after 25 minutes leaving the two oldies to battle it out for immunity. Tragically though, Julie couldn’t do it for the dolls, as Bruce jagged immunity and screwed over all the plans. Just as predicted.

Back at camp everyone pretended to be thrilled for Bruce, which actually annoyed the shit out of literally everyone. None more so than Kellie, who was so very annoyed by the fact Bruce gets to be the spectator at tribal and as she appears to be close to Bruce, she was worried she could be the other back-up. Everyone was scared to throw out a name other than Jake, however, which made Jake realise he was the target and that the Shot in the Dark may be his only option. Instead of locking that in, he got to work visibly hunting for an idol before Katurah offered to go babysit him. He then approached Bruce to see if he’d be willing to play his idol for him, which Bruce obviously wasn’t interested in.

Drew was still nervous, though, so pulled the Reba four and Emily aside to float the idea of taking out Kellie instead, given she holds more power than Bruce and that nobody actually seems to think anyone but Jake is a target. And then after locking in Kellie, Drew immediately grew paranoid that giving Jake another chance could be a grave mistake. Which means Jake is bringing down Drew if he survives the night, mark my words.

At tribal council Bruce tried to talk about breaking a record by losing his vote but being immune. Thankfully it was brushed aside, with Drew reminding everyone that his generosity should be rewarded, while Jake shat on it, pointing out it isn’t charitable, it just means people feel safe. As he stumbled over Jeff’s questions, he eventually threw out a pitch, pointing out a dogpile is never the right move, and the other people on the bottom will regret not making a move if he goes, given it means they will likely be next. Kellie agreed he made some good points, while Dee was sure everyone was still united tonight. Which Jake pointed out was a bad move. Katurah too agreed that Jake did make good points, but it is only true if their next move isn’t solid. Emily said that Jake is just too focused on it being him, with Jake deliberately stumbling yet again, talking about playing his idol. Which Katurah called super concerning.

With that the tribe nervously voted before Jake played his Shot in the Dark, sadly not jagging immunity in the process. After three votes piled up on him, he thought he was done before the Belo women were well and truly gagged to see the rest of the votes pile up on Kellie as she was blindsided from the game. Angry and heartbroken, annoyed at Emily and in shock as Kendra watched on in tears. 

As she arrived at the jury, I pulled her in for a massive hug. And while she immediately pushed me away and as I flew through the air and onto the ground, it is said that my heart doubled in size that day. I came running back, screaming about how much of an icon she is and how grateful I was to be a part of the rage. For some reason, she assumed I was joking and as such started laughing, thanking me for breaking the tension. And while I was confused, we laughed and became besties before smashing a slice or two of Kellie Nalbandia Maria Chocolate Christmas Cake.

I used to hate the entire concept of fruit cakes as a child, but obviously, I aged and my palate refined. Thanks in no small part to recipes like this one. Rich and fruity, with a punch of chocolate and coffee, it is a combination that can turn even the grinchiest grinch into a festive fiend. So thanks, Nigella.

Enjoy!

Kellie Nalbandia Maria Chocolate Christmas Cake
Serves: 8-12.

Ingredients
350g prunes
250g raisins
125g currants
50g candied orange peel
175g soft unsalted butter
175g dark muscovado sugar
175ml honey
125ml tia maria 
2 oranges, zested and juiced
1 ½ tsp mixed spice
¼ cup cocoa
3 eggs
150g flour
75g almond meal
½ tsp baking powder
½ tsp bicarb soda

Method
Preheat the oven to 130°C and double-line the sides and bottom of a 20cm round, deep, cake tin, making sure the paper comes up twice the height of the tin. 

Put the fruit, butter, sugar, runny honey, tia maria, juice and zest, spices and cocoa into a large saucepan and bring to a gentle boil,until the butter melts. Reduce heat to low and simmer for 10 minutes, and then take off the heat and leave to stand for half an hour.

Once it has cooled, beat in the eggs, flour, almond meal, baking powder and bicarb, and stir until combined.

Pour the batter into the prepared cake tin, and pop in the oven and bake for 1¾–2 hours, or until the cake is firm to touch, but shiny and sticky. And most importantly, an inserted skewer will come out a little gooey in the middle.

Remove from the heat and transfer to a cooling rack, where the cake will continue to set using the residual heat. Cover in sprinkles and decorations, before devouring greedily. Or wrapping in foil and popping in a tin until Christmas. But, like, why wait?


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Sausage & Kaleb Pizbrewold

Main, Pizza, Snack, Street Food, Survivor, Survivor 45, TV, TV Recap

Previously on Survivor the tribe met Probst for the first official individual immunity challenge. Only it wasn’t, because as is tradition in the new era, the tribe were split into two random groups with one person winning immunity on each group. And then each group would go to tribal council and vote someone out. To make it twistier, the person that stayed up the longest would earn their group reward and a spot on the jury. As the first person out would become the final pre-juror. After Dee and her super-toes won her group reward, the losers went back to Lulu where Drew offered up Sifu as the target to save himself. And while Kendra wanted to make a move against Bruce, Kellie was able to keep them together and along with Emily, they sent Sifu out of the game and all the way home.

But back to the other group. After the challenge, we followed Quentin Tarrantino’s dream and the team off to the Sanctuary where they joyfully smashed tacos and congratulated each other on making it to the jury. As they smashed their food, Julie spoke about how nervous she was to navigate the vote. Particularly since Kaleb has proven lucky thus far and she doesn’t want it to continue at the expense of her game. Sadly for her, Jake had firmly set his sights on taking out Julie for no other reason than it could potentially weaken Dee, who he deems the biggest threat.

Back at camp Dee and Austin caught up about the vote, with Austin suggesting it would be a good idea to keep Kaleb around, given he is a bigger threat than them and as such, will always be a target. Sadly for him, Dee was fixated on voting out Kaleb again, given it is one that won’t ruffle any feathers. They looped in Jake and Julie, and while Julie was all good, Jake was sick of being told what to do and he went to talk to Kaleb. Kaleb knew his only hope was with Katurah and as such, cautioned Jake that they need to tell her about Bruce’s idol, because if she learns about it from Austin, she is likely to flip on them too. And she is crucial to taking out Julie. Assuming that in a revote, Austin would be too scared to go to rocks and as such, would eventually join them.

Kaleb caught up with Katurah and let her know the plan to spook Austin into flipping on a revote, before he told her about Bruce’s vote. Instantly locking in her loyalty knowing that while Belo are happy to keep her in the dark, he is willing to protect her. Katurah caught up with Jake so that they could run through the plans between Julie and Kaleb, and which one would take them further. She then confronted Jake about the knowledge of the idol, with him subtly pinning the blame on Kaleb and oh god, don’t turn it on my angel.

As the other group left tribal council and the future jurors filed in, Dee spoke about putting the game on pause until they returned from the Sanctuary. And how their feast was a lovely, bonding experience. Which Jake agreed with, though also pointed out that they still need to send someone to kick off the jury. Julie spoke about thinking she was going to play the game as a robot, however she realises it is heartbreaking to send someone home. Katurah spoke about the nervousness of finally being an option to go home, given she has luckily been immune thus far, while Jake admitted he just wants to work with people he thinks will take him further. Kaleb meanwhile said that he played it differently, taking his foot off the gas to show he is willing to work and they don’t need to fear him. Dee spoke about that being great and all, but reminded him that everything relies on people buying what he is selling, too. With Katurah agreeing he has no other options, so of course he is going to say it. And given all the confusion, she will be trusting her gut tonight.

With that the group voted and tragically Katurah joined the Rebas to send Kaleb out of the game, likely to become the sweetest King of the Jury of all time. As he arrived in Ponderosa, I pulled him in for a massive hug and thanked him for being such a delightful breath of fresh air all season. More importantly, he single handedly turned Emily’s game around and allowed her to shine – ignoring Hannah’s quit saving her first, TBH – and while I loved him for himself, that heroic act delivered the season, and for that we should all be grateful. Even more so than him being a total zaddy, and such glorious company to smash a Sausage & Kaleb Pizbrewold with. Particularly since it is what cursed him out of the game.

You know I have a passion for putting sausage in my mouth, and with the addition of kale, you can argue this is healthy. Kinda. A little earthy with a kick of heat, this pizza is super easy to throw together, and will have you coming back for more and more.

Enjoy!

Sausage & Kaleb Pizbrewold
Serves: 2-4, depending on need and/or hunger.

Ingredients
2 bases as per Pizsa Zsa Gabor
4 italian sausages, skins removed
4 cloves garlic, crushed
⅓ cup passata
oregano and basil, roughly chopped, to taste
1 tsp chilli flakes
2 cups shredded kale
mozzarella, to taste

Method
Prep the bases as per Zsa Zsa’s instructions and preheat the oven to 180°C.

Pop the sausage in a skillet over medium heat and cook, breaking up into large chunks with a wooden spoon as you go for a couple of minutes. Add in the garlic and cook for a further minute, or until the sausage is just cooked through.

To assemble, smear passata over the prepared bases, sprinkle with the herbs and chilli, followed by the kale and garlicky sausage before topping, generously, with mozzarella.

Transfer to the oven and bake for fifteen minutes, or until bubbly and golden.

Serve and devour immediately, eating through the pain.


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The Ritsifu Alsup

Drink, Survivor, Survivor 45, TV, TV Recap

Previously on Survivor Bruce returned for another shot at the competition, and almost instantly Katurah developed a deep hatred for his antics. And complained about him in an iconic fashion for six episodes. Sadly for her, he found an idol behind her back – with the help of the rest of the tribe, no less – just before the tribes came together for the non-merge. Kaleb was a sweet icon, winning hearts and minds as soon as they came together. Sadly for him, that led to a deep jealousy from Bruce who quickly turned the tribe against him for being too much of a threat. Thankfully Queen Emily didn’t want to lose her only fellow Lulu, so covertly told him he needed to play his Shot in the Dark. Which he promptly did, earning his safety and negating all 11 votes cast at tribal council. As such, the group had to revote and poor J. copped the stray and found herself out of the game.

Back at camp the tribe was buzzing from the excitement of tribal council, none more so than Kaleb, who congratulated everyone for making the merge. He thanked everyone for treating him with such kindness despite him being at the bottom, while everyone congratulated him for breaking multiple records on his way to making the merge. Though you best believe he knows he still has no allies. Everyone split up, with Bruce confronting Katurah in front of Drew and Austin, then Kaleb and Dee, about the fact she was on the fence about voting Kaleb and suggested that she looped him in on the need to play the Shot in the Dark. Thankfully she kept things calm in front of everyone, pulling him aside in front of her fellow Belo women, to request that he ask those sorts of questions just in front of her.

And just like that, what he thought was a brilliant play to single her out is potentially going to be the thing that ends his game. Hopefully, at least.

The next day Kaleb and Katurah caught up, with the icon quickly looping Kaleb in on the fact that Bruce is a messy, dirty rat and was the one that tried to take down Kaleb. He in turn agreed that he always felt Bruce was out to get him, given he was jealous of how likeable he was. Katurah decided to go lead the charge to get rid of Bruce instead, as unaware to her, Kendra was already talking to Kellie about getting rid of him ASAP. Sadly for the Ks and the audience, Kellie felt like she was Bruce’s number one and as such didn’t want to kill him too quickly. Kaleb and Emily meanwhile caught up, with her assuring him that she wants to work with him, but they just need to bide their time to get rid of more numbers. Emily caught up with Austin, who was vibing with his full powered idol, hopeful to coast by until he could get rid of Kellie and jag a solo steal a vote.

Austin and Sifu were doing some sort of sparring they knew before Bruce jumped in and tried to explain how to do it better, annoying everyone in the process. Kaleb looked on, laughing to himself that it is clear that Bruce only has an extra 14 hours of playing time on the rest of the cast, given he is such a mess. And far from being considered a returnee. Kaleb found Jake and floated the idea of getting rid of Bruce and while Jake wanted to work with Kaleb, he knew he needed to keep numbers for now and as such, got to work bridging the gap between them instead. However when Bruce and Kaleb caught up, Bruce went on some stupid, nonsensical story explaining life to him and yeah, Kaleb has zero desire to work with the pain in the arse.

Sensing he is dislikable, Bruce caught up with Kellie who tried to caution him about running his mouth too much and making himself a target. And while Kellie felt like she didn’t want to get rid of him, she is also exhausted about babysitting the old man. She found Jake to have a nice vent, talking about how Bruce’s mouth will be their downfall if they aren’t careful and as such, they need to lock in Emily and Kaleb to work with them. And keep Bruce as silent as possible.

The tribe joined with Probst for the iconic hold-on-a-telegraph-pole-for-as-long-as-possible challenge. You know the one, Parvati held on casually while everyone else dropped like flies. Oh and given the new era needs a twist, they’d be split into two groups with the winner of each winning immunity as tonight will be a double tribal council. And the one that lasts the longest win’s their group a trip to the sanctuary for tacos and earns the person eliminated from the group a place on the jury. Because the first person voted out will be the last pre-jury member, which TBH, is fucking brutal. And. I. Love. It.

Dee, Julie, Katurah, Jake, Austin and Kaleb formed one group, while Bruce, Sifu, Kendra, Kellie and Emily were competing for the second immunity. But TBH, we kinda know Dee and her long toes are winning this, right? Almost instantly, Emily dropped, followed closely by Queen Julie. And then Queen Kendra, our resident Drew Barrymore impressionist. Jake joined the exodus, followed by Sifu and Bruce, leaving Kellie and Drew to battle for one of the immunities. Austin dropped as Drew started to slide down his pole – yas, king – before ultimately dropping and handing Kellie immunity. She hung in there hoping for reward, as Kaleb dropped, leaving Dee and Katurah battling for the second immunity. Wait, no Katurah dropped, handing Dee the other immunity, leaving her to battle Kellie for the reward. And as predicted, Dee and her super toes slayed, as Kellie fell after 17 minutes.

Meaning Dee’s toes guaranteed everyone in her group a place on the jury.

We followed the losers as they were rightly cast aside to the old Lulu camp. Kellie apologised for screwing everyone out of the tacos, and presumably the jury. Drew caught up with Bruce, offering up a Sifu blindside given he knows the Belos have the upper hand. As he went person to person to beg, Kendra admitted that she would actually be keen to blindside Bruce so he doesn’t get paranoid or worse, idol someone out of the game. As she looped in Drew, Sifu and Emily, Bruce was busy talking to Kellie about how he thinks he is Kendra’s target tonight. Leaving Kellie to try and broker peace between her feuding allies.

Sifu and Emily caught up, with the former having a bad feeling that he will be the one to go for no other reason than everyone wants a Reba out the door. Meanwhile Kellie and Kendra were looping each other in on their relevant intel, with Kellie begging Kendra to assure Bruce that she isn’t coming for him. And while he is annoying, nobody wants to take him to the end. And if he made it, nobody would vote for him, anyway. As such, Kendra approached Drew about changing the vote to Sifu and after assuring Bruce that she wants to work with him, all appeared to be locked in. 

Nervous, Drew pulled Kendra aside to try and sway her back to Bruce. As Kendra tried to assure Bruce she wasn’t against him, he started to rail against her to Kellie, threatening to play his idol as he just can not trust her. Making everyone feel confused and chaotic as they headed out to tribal.

At said tribal council everyone spoke about how they can’t catch a break with all the twists, Drew talking specifically about the fact this tribal carries a lot of weight, given one of them won’t make the jury. Kendra wisely spoke about this tribal council affording her the opportunity to make it to the end and solidify loyalty, before Bruce shut it down saying loyalty changes day by day. Womp womp. Kellie spoke about the confusion of all the random draws and how they still await a vote where everyone is an option. Sifu spoke about his spidey sense that something is afoot and that he is confident he is a target, with Bruce agreeing that he also feels it. Though is trying to trust in the conversations he has had. Sifu, thankfully, called bullshit and spoke about there being a clear split in this group, however all he can do is sell himself as a meatshield. Kendra meanwhile spoke about how it may look like they are Belo strong, but that nobody should assume. Which Bruce jumped on, adding more mystery and confusion to the proceedings.

With that the group voted and Sifu’s gut proved correct as everyone banded together to send Sifu out of the game and all the way home, cursing him to being undateable as a pre-jury finisher. As he arrived at Loser Lodge, I pulled him in for a massive hug and lamented that while his outcome truly sucks, there is something special about being screwed by a twist in the eyes of a fan. And maybe, just maybe, that will be enough to earn him a second chance season. Or something. I was on a time crunch to celebrate his time on the island but get him to the airport before the next boot arrived, so I quickly threw together a The Ritsifu Alsup as a toast out the door.

This fresh, sweet twist on the ritz cocktail is near perfect. A little tart, rich and sweet and delightfully fizzy, it is the right level of festive fun which we truly need now. Forever. And always, TBH. Surprise pre-juror or not.

Enjoy!

The Ritsifu Alsup
Serves: 1.

Ingredients
15ml cointreau
5ml lemon juice
5ml maraschino
20ml cognac
45ml champagne

Method
Pop everything by the champagne in a cocktail shaker, fill with ice and shake until smooth and chill.

Strain into a glass, top with champagne and down. Repeat as required. Responsibly, of course.


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J. Gayatime Pudding

Dessert, Snack, Survivor, Survivor 45, Sweets, TV, TV Recap, Vegetarian

Previously on Survivor Drew, Austin, Julie and Dee formed a tight alliance on original Reba, however were now split down genderlines on new Belo and Reba. After Sean opted to quit, the Reba women focused on telling Sifu that it was J that cast a vote against him, rather than Dee. Which made sense for everyone not named J. Thankfully it didn’t reach its crescendo as the new (which is also just old) Reba won immunity and sent Belo to tribal council. Austin, J and Kellie went on a little journey and were forced to pick between amulets and sandwiches, with Austin desperate for the food though outvoted by the girls. And you best believe he was already plotting revenge before he made it back to camp. At said camp, Kendra went full Drew Barrymore and felt all the feels, while Emily was in the driver’s seat. Ultimately siding with the Rebas to get rid of Brando. And leave Kendra all by herself.

Back at camp the trio tried to assure Kendra that she is solid with them, with her wisely telling them that she completely understands why she wasn’t told. And vowed to work with them moving forward. That was all a farce, however, with Emily squarely in her sights, should she ever get the chance to go full Arya Stark. Because while she believes in karmic retribution in her real life, trust and believe she will be letting her petty flag fly on the island. And this is exactly why I live for her.

The next day we checked in with Lulu where the tribe were busy hunting for idols, with Kaleb leading the charge to guarantee that if he doesn’t have it, he at least knows who does. Right on cue, Bruce found the Beware Advantage directing him to dig under the centre of the shelter. And since Katurah was wandering aimlessly around the shore, Bruce got to digging. Well, until Katurah interrupted him. Everyone stood around awkwardly until Jake went full thespian, pretending to have dropped his ring to justify further digging. Sadly for him, a boat arrived announcing that they would soon be merging and as such, Bruce lost his chance to reclaim his vote.

Wait, no, he had ten minutes to dig and finally, FINALLY, he jagged it. Just before getting on the boat. Like a quote, unquote celebrity.

Lulu and Belo arrived at the former Reba beach to come together and jubilantly celebrate the non-merge. Kaleb meanwhile was hopeful that he and Emily were now in a power position, able to pick which original tribe to go with. But before that, they had a collection of fish to devour which led to Kendra malfunctioning and almost breaking down in tears. She was thrilled to have reconnected with Belo, quickly filling them in on Emily aligning with the Rebas. Emily meanwhile knew she may be in trouble, so pulled Bruce aside to apologise and explain she was just playing devil’s advocate on the boat when they were marooned. After talk turned to the Brando vote, they both agreed to be friendly but it was clear they were against each other.

Austin meanwhile was bitching to Julie and Dee about losing his sandwich, immediately suggesting they target J or Kellie as soon as possible. Knowing Austin needs to sacrifice his vote at the upcoming tribal council to extend the life of his idol, they got to work figuring out someone they can rally the group behind so his vote doesn’t matter, willing to throw J under the bus to weaken their broader target should it get to it.

After a torrential downpour, Sifu, Austin and Emily went for a walk to collect firewood. Before Sifu broke off and was way too much to way too many people. Emily and Kaleb meanwhile caught up to reaffirm their undying loyalty to each other before Kaleb went on a friend making tour, catching up with everyone and winning hearts and minds wherever he goes. Bruce meanwhile was left right out, worried that nobody was talking strategy with him which made him very, very nervous, given Kaleb is friendly with everything. He then confronted Kaleb due to being jealous, and while he tried to pretend he was calm, the relationship with Kaleb is clearly done. Kaleb in turn caught up with Kellie, asking for advice about navigating Bruce, however, it sadly only ended up making Kellie keen to get rid of Bruce at the earliest opportunity too.

The tribe caught up with Probst for the latest immunity challenge where they would be split into two teams to earn the merge. Because ugh, gimmicks. The groups would crawl under a muddy net to a cart, push it through the field to collect sandbags, use the sandbags to climb a tower, collect keys, then climb a boulder to ascend a platform to unlock part 1 of the 2 part puzzle. With the first group to finish the second puzzle merging, having a feast and being immune at tonight’s tribal council. And since there are an odd number of players, the odd one out would back one of the teams and join in their fate. Said unlucky soul turned out to be Katurah, who ultimately backed Sifu, Drew, Bruce, Austin, Julie and Kendra in blue.

Right out of the gate it was clear Katurah made a wise choice as the blue team got out to an early lead at the net. As they got to work pushing the cart, poor J became stuck in the net before finally making it through. It did, however, give blue an epic lead as they collected all their sandbags and released their keys before the other tribe had made it off the course. The blue team got to work on the puzzle and TBH, made it look way too easy as the red team desperately tried to make their way up the boulder, winning themselves and Katurah immunity. And tragically leaving both Lulu’s at risk.

We followed the victors to the sanctuary where they joyously got to work smashing their meal, and awkwardly waited for someone to throw out a name. Well, that is after gushing about butter, which is relatable. Who wouldn’t fuck butter?! Sifu eventually kicked things off, throwing out J with his fellow Rebas agreeing they’d be happy to get rid of her. As a counterpoint, Julie suggested Kaleb could also be a safe vote, with Kendra and Bruce quickly jumping on board, agreeing he is a massive risk and needs to go ASAP. Katurah meanwhile, wasn’t thrilled by the idea pointing out Emily is more of an island, so if they want to get rid of a Lulu, it should be her.

Back at camp, Jake was feeling very anxious about finally attending tribal council. As such, he approached J and suggested they work together, with the duo agreeing that a Lulu needs to go ASAP. While Emily looked to be the easier idea, J was more focused on getting rid of Kaleb as the bigger threat. She looped in Dee, who then caught up with Jake and gagged him by throwing out J as a potential option. The game of telephone began as Dee then looped in Kaleb, while Jake filled in Kellie, who was obviously keen to super power her amulet. 

The two groups finally came together where all hell broke loose. The Belo women caught up and immediately locked in J or Kaleb, with Katurah continuing to point out that getting rid of Kaleb tonight is a bad idea, given J weakens the other alliance. Which should be their focus. It then bounced back and forth between the two and ugh, please do not let us lose King Kaleb so soon. The Rebas caught up with Emily and told her it seems like Kaleb would likely be going home, with her cautioning them that it was too soon and that they could use his gratitude to move forward. Emily then looped in Kaleb and told him he really needs to play his Shot in the Dark before going to the Rebas and pledging his undying loyalty to them, given he now hates Bruce and wants him gone. So much so, he told everyone that Bruce has the idol.

At tribal council the remaining castaways collected their torches before Drew spoke about the information dump that was everyone coming together and how uncertain everyone was in the new group. Emily opened up about squashing the beef with Bruce, J spoke about being overwhelmed by all the new people to navigate while Sifu felt like it was chaos as everyone was inundated by a bunch of noise. Julie meanwhile felt like not everyone was strategising too hard, while Katurah was just worried about people voting for her eventually and how ultimately she feels badly for the six possible options. Kaleb spoke about continuing to be hopeful, despite knowing that he is clearly a target tonight. Emily agreed that she and Kaleb are clearly a little cursed, merge, or non-merge, be damned.

J opened up about spending the day just trying to make sure she doesn’t burn all the bridges as she moves forward. Kaleb meanwhile went the hail mary route and spoke about how while he is a physical threat, he isn’t the biggest strategically and as such, the group should band together to get rid of J. He spoke about how the Reba women have been together for two weeks, pointing out that Dee and Julie would be smart to sacrifice J if for no other reason than lowering their own threat levels. This irked Dee, asking him to potentially outline a few more threats and while he didn’t want to, Dee pointed out that what he said hardly makes her interested in working with him. 

With that the tribe voted, except for Austin who wanted to power his idol up until the final five. And Kaleb, who opted to play his Shot in the Dark. And not just play it, but play it successfully, as he pulled the scroll that read safety and jagged himself immunity as the shocked tribe cheered on. In, I repeat, shock. Particularly as Jeff tallied the votes and every single vote came in for Kaleb, breaking Kelley’s record in the process. Given there were no eligible votes in the urn, the tribe started to scramble with J and Katurah floating Emily, Emily and Bruce locking in J and everyone stopping in with Kaleb to congratulate him for finally getting some luck.

After everyone seemingly locked in the vote for Emily, they once again voted and with no tricks left to save anyone, J found herself exiting the game. As she arrived at Loser Lodge, I pulled her in for an epic hug and told her she did a good job and to hold her head up high. She then thanked me, assuring me she knows that going out at a wild tribal council is always a win. I then explained that I actually was congratulating her for her ability to bite her tongue every time Sifu said he was a songwriter. We then laughed and laughed, at the hilarity of our faux pas – and the jam sessions – before we toasted her epic departure with a delicious J. Gayatime Pudding.

This glorious little pudding is just as glorious as it is easy to make. Velvety and sweet, with the perfect set of salt and a gorgeous – albeit store bought – crumb, it has it all. And has you coming back for more and more.

Enjoy!

J. Gayatime Pudding
Serves: 8.

Ingredients
6 gelatine leaves
400g Dulce de Nick Lachey
500ml custard
3 egg whites
3 tbsp caster sugar
1 tsp kosher salt
600ml double cream, whipped to a soft peak
½ cup Gaytime crumbs

Method
Soak the gelatine in cold water for a few minutes to bloom. Squeeze out the water and add to the bowl of a stand mixer with the dulce de leche and half the custard. Whisk together on low for a couple of minutes.

In another bowl, whisk the egg whites on high until stiff peaks form. Add the sugar and salt and mix until just combined. Fold the egg whites through the toffee mixture, followed by the whipped cream, until just combined. Divide the pudding between serving glasses, cover and pop in the fridge to set for at least 4 hours. 

Once set, remove from the fridge, sprinkle with the crumbs and devour. Like a damn icon.


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Brando Meyer Lemon & Blueberry Donut

Baking, Dessert, Snack, Survivor, Survivor 45, Sweets, TV, TV Recap, Vegetarian

Previously on Survivor, after three long, losing weeks, the last Lulu’s caught a break as two of them were guaranteed to avoid the next tribal council. Because, yes, for the first time in the new era, Jeffrey switched up the tribes. And fate opted to keep things spicy for them, splitting them out across the new tribes. Emily got lucky as the swing vote between Austin and Drew, and Kendra and Brando on the new Belo. Kaleb meanwhile was stuck with the rest of the Belos on Lulu, leaving Sean with the rest of Reba on new Reba. After they lost the immunity challenge, the girls were ready to loop Sean in to blindside Sifu however at tribal council, Sean delivered the ultimate blindside by engineering a quit and bouncing out of the game. While Dee, for reasons, still voted for Sifu.

Back at camp Sifu was, in a word, pissed. Reba sat around the fire in silence until he admitted it was a massive surprise to see his name come up and while the girls didn’t want to talk about it, they eventually tried to pass it off as Sean’s vote. Sadly for them, Sean’s parting gift was to tell Sifu he did not vote for him and just like that, he cursed our queens to a rocky road to merge. Which is very un-queer of him, as us gay men should all be stanning this trio as our potential final three.

The next day we checked in with Belo where everyone was hungry, lethargic and talking about the food they would love to be snacking on. Instead of chocolate, chilli, chicken and peanut butter, Kendra found a worm and despite feeling torn – as a Libra – tried to eat it for some protein. Instead she choked on it and spat it out. Drew meanwhile was living for her energy, given she is silly, charming and keeping their spirits up.

Over at Lulu, Jake tried to keep spirits up by playing his gut as a bongo. Sadly, though, when he stood up he passed out again and ugh, this is not fun to watch. Jake meanwhile was frustrated that it kept happening and feared he would get pulled from the game. Thankfully Kellie assured him it is just that he is standing up too fast when they are starving and seeing her kindness was lovely. As was Jake opening up about overcoming an eating disorder to be here and ugh, I guess I now love Jake?

After perking up, Jake and Kaleb went for a wander to get water, Kellie and Bruce disappeared, leaving Katurah by herself. And like any worthy survivor, she immediately went hunting for idols. Sadly for her, everyone returned to camp at the same time and spotted her, and while she tried to downplay it, everyone decided she was too much of a risk to take any further. Except for Kaleb, who continues to be an icon. Though given he is aligned with everyone but Kellie, maybe Katurah isn’t as safe as I’d like. Knowing Kellie was the key to lasting longer, Kaleb approached her about forming a tight alliance. And yeah, I love him.

Back at Reba the girls were still angry, rightfully, about Sean outing them to Sifu, wishing he had just had the backbone to quit, rather than making them go through the process. We then got a beautiful moment from Dee, who opened up about her family immigrating from Cuba and I’m not sure if it is just me, but this is a winner’s edit. But back to the Sifu of it all, as the women are right to be pissed at Sean, as Sifu opened up about being a volcano ready to explode. And that he will use a fake idol he fashioned to spook the women into keeping him safe. He then caught up with Julie and J, teaching them about tai chi and pushing people, and yeah, he is an-gry.

Returning to Belo, Kendra continued to burp and entertain the people, except for Brando, who felt like out of the people on OG Belo, she was the one he had the least in common with. Thankfully for him, he found a fellow nerd in the form of Drew. After bonding over pokemon, Brando floated the idea of a nerd alliance, however Drew continued to be an icon, and told him it just doesn’t feel like a good idea, given Belo have the upper hand. Reading that as the threat it was, Brando went to bond with Kendra and the duo agreed the focus needed to be on aligning with Emily. Sadly for them, Emily had already been courted by the Rebas and TBH, I love this power position for her.

Back at Lulu, Katurah was delighting in Bruce continuing to Bruce, given he is making himself a target. Well, at least in her eyes. Luckily for her, as my fave, he was too much and everyone started to join her in rolling their eyes. Though Kaleb for one is playing it smart, trying to keep him close so that when he makes a move against him, Bruce does not see it coming.

Over at Reba, J told the girls they need to downplay their closeness, offering to go to Sifu and admit that she was the one to cast a vote against him. So that they lull him into a false sense of security, and then strike. Sadly for J, though, Dee decided that maybe it is just easier to vote J instead when they go back to tribal council. Once again though, Julie cautioned it wasn’t a great idea.

The tribes finally caught up with Jeffrey for immunity where they would race through an obstacle course to collect keys, unlock a hook and use it to collect sandbags and then shoot said sandbags and targets with the first two to knock them out jagging immunity. And a glorious or basic seafood basket. Kaleb got Lulu out to an early lead with Kendra and Sifu nipping at his heels. J closed the gap for Reba and got them out in front before Bruce snatched it back for Lulu. Julie then found the right key on her first go, allowing her to release the sandbags well ahead of the other tribes as J was first to take out a target. Lulu joined in the fun as Dee knocked out Reba’s second target. Lulu knocked out their first target before Sifu snatched immunity for Reba as Katurah took out Lulu’s second target and Kaleb their third, handing Lulu immunity and sending Belo to tribal council.

Oh and this week, there would also be a little journey and since Reba won, they got to decide who would go. J won the rock off for Reba, before sending Kellie to make up for missing out on competing and then Austin, given he may be able to give them information in the game. Much to his frustration.

Back at camp Kendra was in her feels, nervous about potentially going home. The group then opted to take a respectful approach to scrambling, so paired off one at a time to pitch their cases, with Brando and Kendra keen to target Drew with Emily, while Brando tried to convince Drew that he would hand over his Shot in the Dark if he would cast his vote for Kendra, rather than him. Sadly it all started to fall apart for Brando when Emily and Drew caught up and they compared notes, and while Brando tried to throw Drew under the bus when he caught up with Emily, I still feel like Emily is more likely to stick with Reba. 

Over at Journey Island, the trio were delighted to bond as they hiked up the mountain before they came to the pinnacle to discover their choice: sandwiches or an amulet each, which they would need to work together to use. A single amulet being an idol, two a steal a vote and all three would act as an extra vote. Austin was hungry, and knew the amulets were kinda shit as it just paints a target on his back, so voted for sandwiches, while J was firm in wanting an amulet. Forcing Kellie to break the tie, ultimately siding with J as the trio locked in an alliance to work together until the top seven. Whether Austin was interested or not, who secretly wants to get rid of them ASAP.

Returning to Belo, Emily and Drew caught up about the Kendra vote with Drew firm that it was never his idea. Emily, like an icon, told him that she doesn’t actually trust that is the truth, and while he tried to assure her that he is innocent, I’m not sure it is enough. Austin returned and bitched about missing out on sandwiches, though pretend they had to do a challenge to get an advantage. And failed. After Austin filled Drew in on the truth, Drew shared that the OG Belos are coming for him. Austin and Emily caught up, with Austin quickly assuring her that Drew is not lying to her. Particularly after he shared his newest advantage with her, highlighting that he and Drew are trusting and open with her in general.

At tribal council Brando spoke about how excited he was to finally be at tribal council, despite what it symbolises. Emily spoke about being numb to it at this point, ready for a break. Brando spoke about how powerful he thinks new Belo can be, given they’re the only tribe with connections across each of the original tribes. Drew tried to point out that more relationships mean he can’t trust he has a place in everyone’s games, while Kendra admitted she just worried about where the truth was in all of their actions. Giving off big Drew Barrymore energy in the process. Emily spoke about the importance of just surviving each and every vote – like Sandy D – while Austin admitted strength isn’t important to him, just loyalty. Which Drew agreed with, given the merge is imminent and that is where the battle would become a problem. Emily meanwhile ran the numbers and wanted to figure out the best strategy to take her to the end game.

With that, the tribe voted – Austin sacrificing and reinstating his vote to extend the life of his idol to the merge – before Emily opted to stick with the Rebas as Brando was booted from the game. As he arrived at Loser Lodge I pulled him in for a hug and told him to hold his head up high. I mean, nerd on nerd crime is hard to take (as is all intra-community trauma) but Drew has proven to be quite the enigma, giving dude bro and nerd as needed. And while that isn’t the most reassuring thing for Brando to hear, smashing a Brando Meyer Lemon & Blueberry Donut sure worked.

While you don’t technically need to use a Meyer lemon, they do have a nice sweetness to cut through the tart blueberry. But TBH, who really cares if it is a little tart when it comes in the form of a donut.

Enjoy! 

Brando Meyer Lemon & Blueberry Donut
Serves: 2 dear friends.

Ingredients
1 batch Tate Doughnutvans
1 cup raw caster sugar
200g cream cheese
½ cup Lemon Kurd Cobain (specifically meyer lemon, but no judgement)
¼ cup Blueberry Jam Hugh

Method
Cook the donuts per Tate’s recipe and once they have cooled slightly, toss through the sugar to coat.

Pop the cream cheese and curd in a stand mixer and beat with a paddle attachment until well combined.

Pipe each donut with the lemon mixture, leaving a dollop on top. Pop a little spoon of blueberry jam on top. And then, devour.


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Chicken Caesean Saladwards

Poultry, Salad, Survivor, Survivor 45, TV, TV Recap

Previously on Survivor King of the Boxer Brief, Zaddy Austin finally earned his vote back after looping in Dee and Julie about his Beware Advantage and the women promptly found the idol for him. At Belo, Katurah was over Bruce, capital O. V. A. H. Over at Lulu, Emily was mentored by Kaleb and slowly managed to form bonds with Sean and Sabiyah, and frankly started to slay. Despite winning the reward, Lulu couldn’t maintain the momentum as they went back to tribal council with Sabiyah looking to cut Kaleb as the biggest threat. Sadly for her, Emily looped him in and after Sabiyah sacrificed her vote to extend her idol – which she melted out of the wax live at tribal council – ended up voted out with said idol in her pocket.

Back at camp Sean pulled the others in for a hug, praising them for a blindside well played while Kaleb thanked Emily for keeping him in the loop and protecting him. As Sean grew more and more aware he is on the bottom, he simultaneously grew more and more shrill about how he just wished they included him in the blindside as he is thrilled to be out from under Sabiyah’s control. Sadly for him, both Kaleb and Emily realised he was performing to try and stay solid with them. The highlight being when he told Kaleb he never wanted to target him, with Emily laughing and pointing out it means he then wanted her out instead.

The next day the tribes came together with Probst where everyone was gagged to learn Sabiyah had been voted out. As they speculated about the drama of the previous tribal, Emily had a little chuckle about everyone living for the drama but pointing out it sucks to be the tribe that is split in half. As Brando questioned whether things may need a shuffle, Probst followed it up with the ultimate gag as he told everyone to drop their buffs as the tribes were switching up. New Reba was made up of Julie, Dee, Sifu, Jay and Sean, Kaleb was joined by Katurah, Bruce, Kellie and Jake on Lulu while Emily was an island at new Belo with Austin, Drew, Kendra and Brando.

Instead of a challenge, everyone was sent back to their new camps where Kaleb showed the OG Belos around the bland shelter. Bruce immediately started to break down in tears, realising Lulu was living on Tika’s beach and he started to relive the experience of being medically evacuated. He quickly rallied, assuring the tribe he just needed a moment, while poor Kaleb got to work saving himself from the bottom. Katurah asked him to tell everyone about Brandon’s journey and how he lost his vote, which obviously made Bruce realise how little Katurah trusts him. Jake pulled Kaleb aside to bond and see if there was anything there, assuring him that he would gladly vote anyone if it means they can go to the merge together and hopefully build some new alliances.

Over at new Belo everyone was excited to see Emily and get to know her away from delivering iconic sound bites at challenges. Kendra meanwhile was talking about their fishing hole and pulling together a fire, generally being an excellent hostess. As they sat down around the fire to get to know each other, Emily opened up about being on the outs of the tribe, telling everyone the entire dynamics and Sabiyah’s theatrical idol burning situation. As they got their bearings, Drew rightly focused his attention on wooing Emily so he and Austin could gain the upperhand within the tribe.

We finally checked in with new Reba where Sean gleefully started to spill the tea, talking about how he manifested the swap. Which J loved, feeling like she may have finally found someone she could truly align with. As they went off for a walk, Sifu, Julie and Dee speculated how much of a threat Sean could be, so got to work checking his bag for an idol. Sadly for them, he has an intricate way of securing his bag, so had to learn how to tie the same knots before they went through it, and learnt he was powerless. But damn, Dee and Julie are mother, no? J and Sean meanwhile were pledging their undying loyalty to each other, with J talking about how Sifu has always been on the outs of the tribe and as such, her plan would be to get rid of him at the next tribal council. J went back to the girls to let them know what she did, while Julie tried to caution her against getting rid of Sifu’s strength and sending them back to tribal again and again.

The next day things were still quite zen at Belo as Emily worried about whether she would be the swing vote or a safe consensus pick. Today she was bonding with Kendra while Austin and Drew went for a walk to decide where they could safely hide their collection of advantages. They desperately wanted to hang onto them for the merge though, so reiterated how badly they needed to get Emily. Which they promptly did, with her just grateful to have pulled an alliance together without having the looming pressure of tribal council over their head. And seeing her light up about being included and having some autonomy is just beautiful.

Back at Lulu Bruce was continuing to run at an 11. Kellie meanwhile was grateful to have played the middle at the beginning of the game thus far, given it has positioned her well for the swap. As Bruce assured her she was her number one, the duo got to work pulling in Kaleb. Sadly for them, Katurah watched it all and as soon as Kaleb was free, she pulled him aside to talk mad shit with Bruce and tried to pull him in to get rid of Bruce ASAP. And given she is calm and sensible, I think she just found herself a solid ally.

The tribes came together for the first immunity challenge as new tribes where they would have to swim to a cage and climb inside before carrying it into the shore. Then they would then have to dig themselves out to release a person to collect while the rest of the tribe would have to shoot baskets from within the cage, with the first two tribes to shoot all their basket jagging immunity. Lulu and Belo got out to an early lead, with Reba nipping at their heels. When they made it to the shore, Lulu started to pull ahead as Reba caught up with Belo as they struggled on the sand. Kaleb quickly landed two balls for Lulu before the other tribes finally joined him. Sadly it was too late as Kaleb landed his third and jagged himself immunity and flint for the first time. Austin meanwhile scored two points for Belo as Reba desperately tried to close the gap. Sadly for them, it was all for nothing as Austin landed the third one just ahead of Sifu, sending Reba to tribal council.

Sean for his fourth time in as many episodes, as Emily started to sob tears of joy for being safe.

We checked in with Lulu where Kaleb was rightly jubilant as Bruce tried to pretend he lost the flint which led to the first ever non-verbal confessional as Katurah rolled her eyes. Like a damn queen.

Back at Reba, Sean was heartbroken to still be on a losing tribe, questioning whether maybe he is the curse rather than Lulu. They caught up in the ocean where Dee made that exact joke, making Sean even more nervous than he should be. First he caught up with Sifu to talk about how close the girls are, assuring Sifu that if he wants to make a move and align with him, he will be loyal. J meanwhile was busy pointing out to Julie and Dee that it is safest to get rid of Sifu now, given if they go back to tribal council again, he could play an idol and instantly get one of the girls out. Whereas if they blindside him while Sean is still there, they could eliminate that threat. Julie was very against the idea, knowing they needed to keep strength at this point, unless they wanted to be decimated. Sadly, Dee and J were adamant and as such, they pulled Sean aside to loop him in on the plan and assured him that while they will continue to talk Reba strong at tribal, he is safe and to just hold firm.

Sadly for them, Sifu rightly grew nervous that Sean would be able to make things work with the women. While Sean just seemed dejected to be going to yet another tribal council.

Speaking of which, Reba arrived at tribal council where they spoke about how lucky they were to stay Reba strong post swap. Sean admitted he felt lucky after the swap, given he was on the outs after the last tribal council, while Julie got to work pretending the plan is to stay Reba strong. Sean spoke about how he is trying to stay and get to know everyone before J jumped in to talk about the importance of getting rid of the right people at the right time to win challenges. Sean spoke about how committed he is in challenges and how loyal he is which would be good post merge, sounding desperate to stay while Dee continued to pretend to be Reba strong and seemingly shut down his plan.

Sifu spoke about Sean’s positive energy and how much he has loved having him in the tribe, before Probst asked Sean what he has gotten from the game. Sean then gave a lovely speech about needing to learn from failure and that he loves and respects them. He admitted that growing up Mormon made him lose so much time and that playing Survivor allowed him to reclaim it, before breaking down and admitting that his adventure of a lifetime is being at home with his husband. And given how much they all want it, he would prefer they just all vote him out tonight. Jeff, obviously, didn’t love the idea of having yet another quit, as Sean admitting he is happy for them to be Reba strong and get rid of them. Probst pointed out he is simply engineering his own quit while the girls whispered to each other about granting his wish or gunning for Sifu.

With that the tribe voted and as per his request, they banded together to send Sean home. By way of Loser Lodge. Well, except for Dee who kept her vote against Sifu for shits, which seems like a bad decision. But that is a tale for another time. As Sean arrived at Loser Lodge, I pulled him in for a hug and told him to hold his head up high. I mean, I don’t love a quit, but the fact he had such a bad run in his four episodes, I kinda get it. Which is why I served up a big Chicken Caesean Saladwards on his way to the airport.

I know conventional wisdom is that you don’t make friends with salad, but it really isn’t the case when done right. And there is no salad that does more right than this. Bacon, eggs and kilos and kilos of chicken breast? Sign. Me. Up.

Enjoy!

Chicken Caesean Saladwards
Serves: 2.

Ingredients
2 chicken breasts
2 tbsp olive oil
salt and pepper, to taste
1 recipe Palesar Taulad

Method
Heat the oil in a skill over medium-low heat. Season the chicken and cook the breast for about 5-8 minutes before flipping and cooking for another 10 minutes, or until cooked though. Remove from the skillet to rest for 5 minutes before roughly dicing.

Prepare the salad as per Palesar’s recipe before dividing the chicken over the salad and devouring, with love and glee.


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