Oooooohhhh. Fashion.

Guess Who's Coming to Dinner

Turn to the left, turn to the right – my boy Karl Lagerfeld is finally free to drop by and reconnect!

Karl and I have been the goon squad since the mid-50s – he replaced me as Pierre Balmain’s assistant – and he’s coming to my town.

Beep-beep. Beep-beep.

What do I make for my dearest friend … slash fellow inspiration for the hit Bowie song?

Image source: MARTIN BUREAU/AFP/GettyImages.

 

As you can probably tell, we are very social but the fun isn’t only limited to celebrities! You can follow us on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest and Tumblr.

What Time Is It?

Guess Who's Coming to Dinner

Shock horror – it’s date time … as it always is here!

I haven’t spoken about it much publicly but Zefron and I had a horrific break-up a couple of years ago. While we only dated for a short time, after being friends for close to a decade, it was such a mess that our friendship ended too.

Given that I think it is time to end the feud and get the boys back, I reached out to my other boy Corbin Bleu to see if he could help Zac and I get our friendship back on track. Given that he is a firm believer that we’re all in this together, he booked the next flight to Brisbane to help me find a way to sort through the rubble of our best friendship with Zac.

What says, help me fix this mess … and spill the deets on who wins Battle of the Network Stars?

Image source: Unknown.

 

As you can probably tell, we are very social but the fun isn’t only limited to celebrities! You can follow us on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest and Tumblr.

Really Saying Something

Guess Who's Coming to Dinner

While Robert De Niro is waiting for a slot on my dance card, my dear friends Bananarama have finally worn me down for a date.

I know that sounds like I don’t want to catch up with them … but sometimes I wonder, is there a friendship I couldn’t bare to take advantage of?

I then laugh heartily, realising there is nothing I wouldn’t try to monetise and get about menu planning.

What do I make that will make me their fire, at your (and their) desire?

Image source: Unknown.

 

As you can probably tell, we are very social but the fun isn’t only limited to celebrities! You can follow us on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest and Tumblr.

Fame Hungry’s American Teen Princess Pageant

Fame Hungry's American Teen Princess Pageant, Guess Who's Coming to Dinner

You all know that US-A is a-ok, and, well, while Amer-i-can, she tragically couldn’t – Hiz is the OG Shea Couleé and that is just way too heartbreaking for you, me and Carole Radziwill.

Given that reality is way too depressing and Trinity Taylor’s likeability has softened me to the pageant world, I thought it best to honour Independence Day by celebrating the greatest film of all time, Drop Dead Gorgeous.

So grab your best lutefisk, prep your giant parade swan, melt a beer can to your hand and get ready to cheer on the huskies, are all the things that are great about America – Mount Rose, Adam West, my brother Peter, Days of our Lives, Butterick Pattern 7432, medical science replacing the skin from my belly with skin from my butt, Soylent Green, and my daughter … Rebecca. Ann. LEEEMAAAANNNNNN.

And obvi, Sarah Rose Cosmetics. Now where the hell is my waiter?

Wait, that’s me – check back tomorrow as we kick off Fame Hungry’s American Teen Princess Pageant!

Image source: Still from Drop Dead Gorgeous.

 

As you can probably tell, we are very social but the fun isn’t only limited to celebrities! You can follow us on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest and Tumblr.

Whishaw’n’hopin’

Guess Who's Coming to Dinner

Sometimes I don’t know if the burgeoning culinary writing fame is a blessing or a curse. I mean, it is fantastic to share a glimpse of life on the A-list with plebs like you – oh, congrats Bey and Jay, so excited about the birth of Ben and Annelie Jnr’s – but then you’ve also got the curse of friends desperate to appear to help their careers under the guise of reconnecting.

Yes, that may sound harsh … but I am referring to an ex here, so I’m always going to throw a bit of shade.

As you know, I caught up with my boy Lin-Manuel for Tony Gold and he was telling me how desperate my ex Ben Whishaw was to reconnect. Now since he is currently filming a lead role in Mary Poppins Returns opposite Lin, Mez and Ang, I’m kind of concerned about his motives for catching-up … since that movie is fucking A-list.

Is it possible to impregnate a man? Or is he London spying a return to his OG Aussie love?

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As you can probably tell, we are very social but the fun isn’t only limited to celebrities! You can follow us on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest and Tumblr.

Bloginshambles

Guess Who's Coming to Dinner

All this celebrating theatre and the musical arts have made me feel misty for my dear, musically inclined friend Pete Doherty.

I’m sure it is quite obvious already but Pete, cocaine Kate and I were dear friends in the noughties, before he and I formed a true, coherent connection whilst completing rehab together.

He was super inspired by all the Broadway babies I caught up with recently and called to see if I’d be interested in turning our relationship into a musical. While asking made me question whether he knew me at all – of course, I’d sell anything to further myself – I giddily said yes.

What says I’m glad we’re sober enough to exploit our scandalous relationship?

Image source: Unknown.

 

As you can probably tell, we are very social but the fun isn’t only limited to celebrities! You can follow us on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest and Tumblr.

Tony Gold: Hamilgold

Guess Who's Coming to Dinner, Tony Gold, Tony Gold: Hamilgold

How does a bastard, whore-fan, son of a bitch and a lover of men, dropped in the middle of a forgotten spot in the Tweed on the GC, embellishing no squalor, grow up to be a hero and a star?

Not getting out of bed for less than ten-dollar Founding Father without a actor father got a lot farther by workin’ a lot harder, by scheme’n a lot smarter, by not letting anyone be a self-finisher, by fourteen, they placed him in the lead of a school musical.

And every day while extras were being slaughtered and carted, away across the waves, he struggled and kept his star up. Inside, he was longing for something better to be a part of, the brother was ready to beg, steal, borrow or barter his way to Hollywood or the great white way.

That’s right people, we are finally celebrating the final piece of the EGOT puzzle – welcome to Tony Gold: Hamilgold.

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As you can probably tell, we are very social but the fun isn’t only limited to celebrities! You can follow us on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest and Tumblr.

Her Nightmare on Carol’s Lion Tattoo Network

Guess Who's Coming to Dinner

This week is quite the biggy peeps, because i’m reconnecting with someone that not only has a familial history with football, was/is an heir to a dynasty … but who also played an integral part in ending one of my most violent and brutal feuds.

The feud? With Nicky Kids whom I love dearly now. The woman integral in helping us sort our shit out? Heir to the  Pittsburgh Steelers and New York Giants, Rooney Mara.

Roons and I have been friends for years, given how much we have in common and when she mentioned getting the job on Lion I was ropeable that she would debase herself to work with my worst nemesis Nicole.

But then Roons happened and mediated us through our bullshit and helped us become the best of friends. Rooney, without overstating it is the truest of miracle workers … and a saint. What do I make that is worthy of this dear woman?

Image source: Neilson Barnard/Getty Images.

 

As you can probably tell, we are very social but the fun isn’t only limited to celebrities! You can follow us on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest and Tumblr.

My country’s for old men

Guess Who's Coming to Dinner

I have oft been described as an octogenarian in a thirty year old’s body, which I admit was super offensive until my last birthday on account of me still being in my 20s.

But anyway, now that i’m actually a senior stuck in a 30 year old’s body, I’m completely embracing my daddy-dom – as the kids say – growing out my Mr Sheffield streaks and hanging out with my distinguished peers, like the divine Cormac McCarthy.

I first met Cors at a writing workshop while attending the University of Tennessee in the 50s, where we bonded over our passion for (Phil) Olivetti typewriters, as was the style of the time.

I gave him a call on the wireless the other day and thankfully his dance card was free for latter this week. What says we’re going to the jitterbug and do the Charleston like a brutal piece of western American literature?

Image source: Unknown.

 

As you can probably tell, we are very social but the fun isn’t only limited to celebrities! You can follow us on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest and Tumblr.