Chilli Powder

BBQ Monicken Burgerly Hillz

Burgers, Main, Poultry, RuPaul's Drag Race All Stars, Street Food, TV, TV Recap

Previously on RuPaul’s Drag Race All Stars, Ru gave the people what they wanted, bringing back eight legendary legends to compete for the chance to be the one queen to rule them all. Or ring to rule them all. Or was it for all of them to rule the ring? You know what, it doesn’t matter. Week after week, the winner’s slay and surprised, racking up points to land in two pools with Raja and Yvie battling out for the lesser crown, with Mother taking out the title of Queen of She Done Already Done Had Herses. When it came to the main title, Shea and Trinity had to settle for third/fourth again like Season 9, while Jinkx defeated Monet and became the first – hopefully of many – Queen of All Queens.

But things are back to normal – well, after Ru gave us her best spoken word about fame, or something – as soft and supple Heidi N Closet made her triumphant return to the Werk Room and ugh, I love her so much and damn does she look good. Whether Nicki Minaj likes her make-up or not. She was joined by Mrs Kasha Davis fresh from AA – legitimately – and ugh, I have missed her so much because she is a gorgeous old dame and ugh, just perfection. Speaking of perfection, Naysha Lopez came back beat and blessed, ready for her third elimination, though this time, not until she has proven herself. Another doll with something to prove is Kahanna Montrese – Coco’s girl – and ugh, she has glowed up and is ready to do mama proud. Because she has done the work and is primed to slay. Oh and then Kandy Muse returned and ugh, she is so much fun and I live.

Or die, bitch.

Darienne Lake finally arrived at All Stars and even if I didn’t live for her in Season 6, she is a legend and the fact it has taken until the eighth All Stars to see her back is horrible. Speaking of long overdue returns Monica Beverly Hillz arrived ready to redeem herself from her lack of confidence in Season 5 and yes, Monica, slay that troop outfit. Jaymes Mansfield was up next looking stunning and ugh, please no cheerleading challenges because she is the Jennifer Coolidge of Drag Race and needs to last to the end. THE producer Alexis Michelle was up next, and she is ready to show off all her skills. Because you know she has a lot of them, ok? Like Darienne, Jessica Wild has finally come to All Stars and hot damn, she looked stunning and I am so excited to see what she can do after 13 years.

Then Jimbo cruised on in looking like $20 bucks and ugh, crown her. She is stupid, camp and it looks like she is ready for her win. Speaking of back for a win, Lala Ri is back looking perfect though to be fair, anything is better than her bag look. Literally anything. But I love her, trust and believe. Once they were all sure it was just them, Naysha pointed out that each season has a little twist and as such wanted to figure it out ASAP, with Jessica suggesting it was just her finally getting cast.

Ru arrived to welcome back her daughters – or in the words of Teresa Giudice, dor-tors – before shutting down Naysha’s theory, announcing rules are defaulting back to the usual All Stars ones. Aka the winner takes on an assassin with the winner sending a sister home if she wins, otherwise the group votes to boot a bottom. Even though, duh, we’re all bottoms. Oh and the $200k prize is here to stay. But there is also a second way to win this year, Raja style, though Ru won’t give them the deets until later. Scaring Jimbo, since she can’t even win one way!

They kicked things off with a little dual-runway Mini Challenge, the first being Famous Then where Alexis slayed as slutty Mame in shimmering white. Kahanna was a stunning showgirl in black velvet, Heidi was opulent and camp, ready for the hat parade, while Mrs. Kasha Davis was stunning as Zigfield Follies Extra #2. Nayasha served Coco Chanel realness, Kandy took it more modern with a Supermodel RuPaul look before Darienne went all the way back to medieval in a purple gown. Monica slayed as glam Cleopatra, Jaymes was stunning in a slutty Mexican showgirl number, Jessica Wild was perfection as Nefertiti while Jimbo gave the most perfectly demented Marilyn. Oh and Lala was a glittering hour glass and looked stun. Ning.

On the Famous Now runway Alexis gave full Kim K realness, Kahanna looked like hot Barbie Lil Nas X, Heidi gave kabuki bow, MKD was a perfect Kris Jenner disco ball, Naysha was full Versace glam – Ver, Sayce – Kandy was stunning in pink fur while Darienne Lake was a hilariously old Billie Eilish, Monica gave Kim Petras perfection, Jaymes gave Jojo Siwa does Judy Jetson, Jessica was stunning in a red latex Bad Bunny inspired look, Jimbo served a perfect ode to the horror of social media before Lala Ri gave nude illusion for her Ru-ly Fans.

The dolls returned to the Werk Room where they started to untuck before Alexis admitted to having a crush on Lala. Kandy meanwhile was kikiing with the dolls about who they were shocked to see, with Kahanna and Naysha admitting Jimbo crossing to the US was the biggest gag to them. Speaking of Jimbo, she was busy charming her new sisters though, with everyone delighted by the fact that she loves to compete. While Jessica joked about how much things have changed since Season 2, given they aren’t rocking Forever 21 (hey, as long as it isn’t any more fucking H&M). Lala Ri meanwhile joked about not needing to be nice given you can’t win Miss Congeniality. Oh and then we learnt that for some reason, Heidi was wearing a denim codpiece while Darienne and Jaymes just speculated about the twist in the corner.

Ru came back to kiki with the dolls announcing that for their opening Maxi Challenge the dolls would form rival girl groups and perform rumixes of Fenton and Randy’s Money Success Fame & Glamour. Naysha, Darienne, Kahanna, Kandy, Alexis and Heidi got the glam rock version while MKD, Jaymes, Lala, Jimbo, Monica and Jessica were given the disco remix. Oh and in addition to writing their own verses, they’d also have to choreograph their routine before performing live on the mainstage. After quickly working through their songs, the dolls all went to the mainstage to work on the choreography with Heidi taking the lead for Team Glam Rock. And like Jaymes and Jimbo, I don’t know how Fosse makes sense but I love Heidi, so I’ll let it slide. Plus, Kandy was willing to call out her lack of star quality in choreography, so I don’t need to read her. And well, let’s just say, she was pressed, not blessed. Team Disco meanwhile were living their best lives as Lala and Jessica took the lead giving on brand choreography. The problem being Jessica was slaying while the rest of the dolls were lost. Like, not even on the map.

Elimination Day arrived with the dolls immediately splitting up to beat their mugs with Darienne ready to motorboat Jimbo, as Lala and Jaymes were kikied about the latter planning to bring down by winging it, should she forget the choreography. Naysha meanwhile was busy lifting up Monica who was super nervous and just couldn’t get out of her head. Oh and then Kandy and Jimbo – and Heidi – formed a little alliance to navigate the rumoceracy and ugh, I live for them finally playing it like Survivor superfan, Monet. Talk turned back to the twist before Alexis assured the dolls she would be playing fair, whatever it is. Jimbo agreed, cautioning everyone to not play too hard, given it came back to bite her on UK VS the World while Kandy reminded them things are always going to be messy so suggested they just relax and do what needs to be done.

Ru, Michelle and the hilarious Ross Mathews were joined by the indelible Adele Dazeem. Fame Tarts were up first with the Glam Rock version and well, they were good, hitting every beat, cohesive and so damn fun. None more so than Kahanna who showed she is fully baked and ready to star. The Glitter Chicks meanwhile served full disco and I live. Jaymes was demented, Jessica was sexy, Jimbo was hilarious, Lala gave Bey, MKD was camp perfection and well, poor Monica was lost but looked soooooo good, which is all that matters.

On the Famous Forever – aka signature Drag – runway, Alexis was stunning serving Jessica Rabbit realness. Darienne was a shimmering leopard print glamazon, Heidi was full Chris Tucker zebra pimp, Kahanna was STUNNING as a literal phoenix, Kandy gave metallic red glam, Naysha served icy glam bodysuit, Jaymes gave old Hollywood perfection, Jessica looked like a rocker ringmaster in all the right ways, Jimbo was a neon brain delight, Lala Ri gave showgirl gone to a wedding, Monica looked beautiful in a purple fringed bodysuit while MKD gave glam purple housewife.

Ultimately Heidi, Kandy, Naysha, Jessica, Jimbo and MKD were sent to safety before Alexis received universal praise for all of her looks and for taking big risks. Oh and they loved that in the performance, she served star. Darienne meanwhile was read for being too pedestrian on the first two runways, though they loved her energy in the performance. Choreography be damned! Kahanna meanwhile received wall to wall praise for each and every thing she served this week. As did Jaymes, particularly for her serving demented layers and giving such different concepts. Oh and they didn’t care that she couldn’t dance. Lala meanwhile was praised for her star power in the performance and for giving 2 out of 3 perfect looks. While Monica’s first runway was beloved, though she was read for being completely overcome by her nerves. She then started to sob as Ross encouraged her to own her power which was both sweet – thanks Ross – and heartbreaking. Ultimately Kahanna took out the first win of the season before Alexis, Jaymes and Lala were deemed safe, leaving Darienne and Monica up for elimination. And well, I hate it here.

Backstage the safe girls were exhausted but thrilled to have made it through the first week, sharing that they love Untucked more than anything. With Heidi admitting it was just because she wanted to see a fight, which made everyone immediately look at Kandy. For obvious reasons. Heidi meanwhile turned conversation back to the twist speculating the eliminated girls could vote someone back in, that fans will vote for a winner or my fave, that they are the tops and all the other girls are up for elimination. Speaking of the actual tops and bottoms, they returned with everyone praising a jubilant Kahanna on her win. Though she was nervous about her vote having to dictate the tone of the season.

Both Darienne and Monica opened up about being heartbroken to have landed in the bottom, Monica in particular as she sobbed in her friend Naysha’s arms. Kahanna pulled her aside to kiki, assuring her she thinks she is a star and that she was so excited to see her in the competition. While poor Monica was just so down on herself and it was hard to watch. Darienne meanwhile was telling the dolls her fashion choices cost her, reminding them how badly she wants to be here. The bottoms switched places with Monica telling her sisters she deserves to be here and has worked her arse off to shine. As Jessica and Alexis tried to lift her up, before Alexis sobbed about feeling bad for the girls. And because she wasn’t sure how she’d be received. Like, sobbing. And god her sisters were confused. Like, you thought Milk crying over being safe was bad? This is sobbing for being in the top. 

Darienne meanwhile held it WAY more together, assuring Kahanna she is a star and is fired up to be here. Naysha and Kandy meanwhile were busy whispering, with Naysha not wanting to vote out her childhood friend Monica, nor her teammate Darienne. Before Alexis could start sobbing again, Idina Menzel dropped backstage to kiki with the dolls with Alexis thanking her for being such a star. Idina then told the dolls to channel someone they admire on their off days, before regalling them with tales and ugh, she is so cute and sweet and I love her.

With that the dolls voted before Kahanna took her place on the mainstage before Ru pulled up the curtains to reveal our first lip sync assassin of the season, the iconic Aja LaBeija. Kandy’s mama, ok? And as soon as Beyonce’s Freakum Dress kicked off, Aja owned the show. She was flicking wigs, camp and hitting every lyric. She was flipping and splitting and well, I THOUGHT SHE WAS GOING TO JUMP FROM THERE as she vogued the house down. Kahanna was also a star and showed she is not to be counted out, but Aja is Aja and seeing her perform on the mainstage was perfection and I need her back ASAP. After Aja took out the win – that $10k rolling over to next week – Kahanna took her place at the back of the stage before Ru finally announced that other way to win, with us fans getting the chance to vote on the unused runways of the eliminated queens for a cash prize of $50K.

Oh and that first eliminated queen, tragically, was Monica who wasn’t exactly shocked, but watching her put on a brave face felt tragic. I pulled her in for a hug as soon as she returned to the Werk Room, telling her to get whatever negative thoughts she may have out of her mind and remember that she is not only beloved by the fandom, but super talented and has been thriving as her true self for such a long time. And we were lucky enough to see that in her return. I then reiterated that first boots are always beloved and that she has nothing more to prove, so to simply be proud of her success and smash a big, juicy BBQ Monicken Burgerly Hillz.


While this is quite a kick, simple and, gulp, healthy burger, there is something infinite satisfying. No oil to contend with while being all at once fresh and tangy, it is the ultimate choice when you need a quick little burger pick-me-up.

Enjoy!


BBQ Monicken Burgerly Hillz
Serves: 2.

Ingredients
olive oil
1 chicken breast, halved horizontally
1 tsp smoked paprika
½ tsp chilli powder
½ tsp cumin
kosher salt and pepper, to taste
2 Briocher Bünsberg
3 tbsp Chicktina Big McDonald Sauce
2 slices American cheese
1 tomato, sliced
1 cup Slawren Rimmer
chips, fries, wedges or whatever your side of choice may be, to serve 

Method
Pop the chicken in a bowl with two teaspoons of oil, the paprika, chilli powder, cumin and a good whack of salt and pepper, and toss until well combined. Heat a lug of oil in a skillet over medium heat, add the chicken and cook for a few minutes before flipping and cooking for another 3-5 minutes, or until cooked through. Remove from heat and leave to rest.

To assemble, toast the inside of the rolls and smear with some of the sauce. Pop a slice of cheese on the base, followed by some tomato, the chicken and the slaw before closing. And then devouring, regally, with a shit tonne of your favourite sides.


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Sheetpanny Massachos

Main, Poultry, Street Food, Survivor, Survivor 44, TV, TV Recap

Previously on Survivor the top eight tried to regroup after an explosive tribal council, none more so than Jamie, who not only was blindsided but also saw her idol walk out of the game in Kane’s pocket. After Frannie took out an epic overnight reward featuring letters from home, she took all the mothers with her, leaving Jamie to do damage control with the boys. Despite telling them nothing but the truth, the boys didn’t believe her (fake) idol walked out the door and as such, she emerged as just as big a threat as challenge beast Frannie. After Carson took out immunity, the tribe tried to figure out which threat was the more pressing issue, with Frannie tragically booted – behind Carolyn’s back who was the only one pushing for Danny, no less – to reunite with her boo, Matt.

Which makes me so happy, despite the loss.

Back at camp Carolyn couldn’t hide her rage at Yam Yam and Carson for not just booting her bestie Frannie, but more importantly, for leaving her out of the vote. While Yam Yam knew it was never going to go down well, he admitted he didn’t expect it to go that badly. She cried and yelled at them as she tried to process the betrayal, while the rest of the tribe huddled at camp glad to not be involved. After Yam Yam went to keep them happy and explain Carolyn was just frustrated – complete with painting her as a massive threat – Carolyn explained to Carson she just never expected they would betray her and as such, she just needs time. Meanwhile Danny was also feeling nervous after his name came up, while Heidi iconically admitted to us that it was totally her that voted for him, but she had zero intentions of telling him that, so instead threw our dearly departed Frannie under the bus.

The next day the tribe woke up for some morning yoga as Jaime asked them all to share and ugh, she is so sweet and I hate how well she thinks she is playing – because she is doing well, TBH – while the producers troll her. As part of their sharing, Heidi opened up about her struggles in life, moving from Puerto Rico barely speaking English, always pushing hard to get what she wants and you best believe she is bringing that energy into the game. Carolyn and Yam Yam took a quiet moment in the dunes to clear the air, assuring each other that it is water under the bridge. Carson soon joined them with the trio proud of how solid they have played as they locked in their final three. Oh and their next plan was to out Heidi for voting for Danny at the previous tribal council to sow a little chaos. After Yam Yam filled him in on the truth, Danny wasn’t sure how it could even benefit her game and as such, went directly to Heidi to see if it was true. And as is fast becoming tradition this season, he believed Heidi’s lies that it wasn’t her and instead decided he needed to come for Yam Yam and the Tika trio.

The tribe came together to enjoy some quiet time by the beach where Carolyn unveiled her lobster shell jewellery and nail adornments. And since she is now one with the lobster, she went frolicking in the ocean as Yam Yam fished, singing Little Mermaid, whether CBS would pay for the rights or not. So yeah, they need to edit the new movie ASAP. The duo then caught up to lock in their next target as either Danny or Lauren, though Yam Yam admitted Danny will likely do whatever they say at tribal council, so they should consider keeping him. Sadly for them, that will not be the case as the rest of the tribe were quickly locking in against the Tika trio – NOOOOOOO – specifically Yam Yam – double noooooo – given he is so likeable. And while they all admitted they love him, they were wise enough to realise that it is that exact thing that makes him a threat.

My love Probst made his episodic debut for the famed Last Gasp immunity challenge where everyone would have to stay under a grate as the tide rises, with the last person under the grate winning. Or two, if the tide starts going back out like last season. Despite not being able to 3D print this one, Carson admitted he practised it in a bathtub, which of course. Yam Yam spoke about trying to become one with the ocean despite how cold it was, while Lauren was already miserable as she shivered away. Everyone was still going after 30 minutes after which Lauren dipped out followed by Jamie as the water started lapping at her nose. After the grate became submerged it was Carson that was next to exit, followed by Carolyn and breath king, zaddy Danny. Heidi and Yam Yam continued to battle for a few minutes before Heidi dropped, handing Yam Yam immunity as he sobbed and his tribe mates looked on with pride.

Back at camp Carson and Carolyn spoke about how critical tonight is for their end game, given Tika is currently outnumbered, should everyone rally against them. Which they obviously did, locking in Carson as the next biggest threat. Danny told Tika that he and Heidi were planning to split between Lauren and Jamie, which Carolyn hilariously saw through as a lie. The Ratus however were just worried about upsetting Carolyn if they blindside Carson. Heidi meanwhile was focused on figuring out if there is a counterplan so she can find the right time to play her idol. Carolyn on the other hand tried to convince Yam Yam that Danny is lying to them and is planning to target Carson, so instead wanted to flip the vote on Danny. Given she wants meathead journey revenge, but also because he is more likely to snatch immunity.

Carson approached the Ratu girls to share his fear that he is Danny’s target, floating the idea of joining together to split up Danny and Heidi. And while he was confident they were on board, they were thrilled to hold the power to decide which group they go with. Carolyn meanwhile was busy reiterating to Yam Yam how important it is to save Carson, begging him to stay strong on Danny and leave the rest to her. While he cautioned her to stay calm. She then joined Carson and filled him in on her idol and assured him she would play it, though she then kinda spiralled about all the variables. Particularly nervous about playing her idol for Carson and getting voted out as a result.

At tribal council Jamie spoke about the fluidity of the game, just needing to find a group of people with a shared target at each vote. Danny meanwhile admitted he was tired, but knew that everyone is a threat and as such, has tried to stay vigilant. Heidi spoke about the need to take risks to make it to the end, while Yam Yam shared he is dedicating all his time to thinking about the jury. Which is draining, but thrilling. Carolyn too has been spinning out by the constant thinking, while Danny spoke about the importance of being chill like a seasoned fighter. Which made Carolyn roll her eyes, given it felt like a dig TBH, is not the case. Lauren meanwhile tried to shade Carolyn for being emotional while she said that she is more experienced and cerebral, which lol, Carolyn runs circles around everyone.

Sadly she then got emotional, sassing out Danny before admitting to Jeff that even he was pissing her off right now. Thankfully Jeffrey praised her for always speaking her mind and fighting, while Yam Yam alluded to the fact he is very nervous about losing an ally tonight while Jamie just wanted everyone to play their roles. Danny was confident in the people he was working with, while Heidi is nervous given her name keeps coming out. Oh and Carson is just nervous, given he knows he is a target and is just proud of himself for achieving so much as a sweet, quirky nerd and ugh, I love him and if Ratu joins with Soka, I am going to riot. Yam Yam praised Carson for being such a sweetheart while Carolyn admitted she is very nervous, particularly since she has had to put her trust in people that betrayed her last tribal council.

With that the tribe voted – Carolyn for what felt like an eternity – before Carolyn whipped out her idol for her sweet baby boy Carson. Sadly for her, it wasn’t necessary as she negated two votes for him before Danny was booted from the game. Complete with his De Niro impersonation for his friends back home which was just dorky and sweet and I miss him already. Given he took it so well, I pulled him in for a massive hug at Ponderosa and thanked him for providing so much levity this season. And guaranteeing a zaddy is cast in a future returnee season, which honestly, is enough to earn you a Sheetpanny Massachos.


This tweaked version of an Antoni number is so packed full of flavours you’ll return to it week after week. A kick of spice and a punch of zing, everything works together perfectly to warm your heart on the coldest of days.

Enjoy!


Sheetpanny Massachos
Serves: 6.

Ingredients
500g chicken breast, roasted and shredded
¾ tsp chilli powder
5 tbsp fresh lime juice
3 tbsp chipotle chiles in adobo, diced
1 tsp kosher salt
450g tomatoes, diced
½ small red onion, diced
2 tbsp seeded jalapenos, diced
3 tbsp coriander, roughly chopped plus extra to serve
400g can black beans, rinsed and drained
350g Tortéa Leoni Chips
450g vintage cheddar, grated
1 avocado, diced
sour cream, to serve

Method
Heat the oven to 220C.

Combine the shredded chicken, chilli powder, three tablespoons of lime juice, the chipotle in adobo and ½ tsp of kosher salt. Next, make the pico de gallo by combining the tomato, onion, fresh jalapeno and coriander with a tablespoon of lime juice and ¼ tsp salt in another bowl. And rounding out the prep, combine the beans, a tablespoon of lime juice and ¼ tsp salt in a bowl and gently crush them to absorb the flavours, but still retain their shape.

To assemble, arrange half the corn chips on the sheet pan, followed by half the chicken measure, half the pico de gallo, half the beans and half the cheese. Now, here is where things get weird, you repeat the process again. Wild, no? Transfer to the oven to bake for 10-15 minutes, or until golden and crisp.

Serve piping hot, topped with diced avo and sour cream, before devouring.


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Luxx Tiknoir Lasagdon

Main, Pasta, Poultry, RuPaul's Drag Race, RuPaul's Drag Race 15, TV, TV Recap

Previously on RuPaul’s Drag Race the top four returned to the Werk Room ready for a triumphant final lap on their way to the finale before Ru gagged them with the fact there would only be a top three this year. Meaning after the rumix and film clip, one of the dolls would claim a final win and another would suffer the unkindest cut of all. Obviously Sasha was perfection from start to finish, while Luxx’s songwriting skills took her through to the finale with Sasha. At the other end of the pack, Mistress getting in her head and Anetra’s not-sure-why were all it took to land them in the bottom. Thankfully forcing Mama Ru’s hand as she finally dished out a double save to keep our very deserving top four intact.

Before we get to the finale though, we have to reunite and sadly the only way out of a season is through. As such, the dolls all took their places on the Ace Theatre stage in alphabetical order – that is Amethyst, Anetra, Aura, Irene, Jax, Loosey, Luxx, Malaysia, Marcia Cubed, Mistress, Princess, Robin, Salina, Sasha and Sugar and Spice, the latter two being out of order on a technicality since they were treated as a sole entity. After reminding us that American politics is a total dumpster fire riddled hellscape, Ru addressed Mistress’ passion for kleptomania – relatable – with her admitting to taking books, earrings and some wigs. Before she gagged us with the fact that Anetra stole things from the set too. In the form of lightbulbs.

Given reunions are generally pretty talk heavy and boring, we will stick to the highlights. The first being how delightful Sugar and Spice were! The former was proud to have learnt how strong she is which Spice tried to reiterate, until she lost her train of thought. Mistress admitted that while she didn’t vibe straight away, she was thrilled by how quickly they won her over and is proud to now have them as her daughters. We then got a supercut of the eras with Irene relishing her screen time era while Sugar was in her nail era, despite not wearing nails. Talk turned to the dolls passion for making it a top two each week before it turned into reading Loosey for always thinking she should win. Until Sasha reminded the dolls that in most of these battles, she took out the win which is all that truly matters. 

It then turned into a compliment sandwich as Amethyst spilt the tea that before being cast, Loosey spoke about winning everything if she ever competed when working together at da clurb, before my dear friend Kevin Bacon dialled in to praise Loosey for her Dragloose performance. Oh and then the dolls read Loosey for not letting loose when singing her song, let loose.

We addressed the lip syncs of the season, with Sasha and Anetra’s from Lalaparuza still amazing everyone. Anetra was also present in the best of the season, with Marcia Cubed and hot damn, I still wish it was a double save. Irene praised Anetra for being a killer performer, and I love how wholesome it is. They pivoted back to the Lalaparuza, choices, with Malaysia still pretending she wasn’t going for the easy kill in Marcia. Talk then turned to everyone not thinking Mistress beat Jax in the lip sync and ugh, I love her confidence and also now think how boring this season would have been without her.

Robin and Amethyst’s history came up again with the former thinking Amethyst was a little deluded, while they both reiterated the importance of not shitting where you eat. Talk turned to crushes on the season with Aura admitting she is hot for Princess, despite the fact she is getting married.

Coco Montrese dialled in to ask Marcia about her make-up skills, with her proud of how much she has improved. Oh and she is releasing a make-up line, with Aura asking if it would just be eye liner. Which is a hilarious read. Asia dialled in to ask Sasha who her favourite drag performer is, with her opting for Monica Monroe. DeJa called in to ask Robin for a Best Buy discount – like an icon – Aquaria asked why Irene trolled the dolls online all season, with Irene essentially admitting she just wanted to be involved. Which is awkward since Mistress blocked her. Maybe. Derrick asked Loosey if she blames it on the edit. Robin’s mother asked Mistress why she came for her daughter in the first episode, with Mistress reminding them she was just in her chaotic era and nothing more. Aura’s mum asked Spice why she wanted Aura in the bottom in Snatch Game, given she would have been sent home if she faced off against her baby. 

We finally got to see more of the reading challenge and damn, Salina was glorious. Ru opened the library for the eliminated dolls, with Sugar hilariously reading Robin’s screen time before Spice asked to read Sugar. Princess read Aura for being a torn bottom and Loosey for her lack of taste, while Irene read Sasha for being beautiful. Oh and Salina hates Irene, apparently based on her epic eyerolls. Talk turned to the many gates of the season ad yeah, the dolls loved to fight. And I love them for that. Malaysia admitted she just didn’t realise Luxx was trolling her during Metalgate, Loosey admitted she didn’t have a bump during Babybumpgate and Loosey just felt like Mistress was just always coming for her during Heavengate. While Anetra just loved everyone else’s drama. Oh and things turned to 40-inch gate with Luxx finally admitting she just likes to round up.

Ru turned our attention to some of the best looks we didn’t get to see from the eliminated queens with Amethyst living for her rip it to shreds look, Aura’s Bey runway was stunning, Malaysia’s glove look was perfect Mrs Clause, Irene’s Miss Cleo puffer look was stunning, with Sugar thanking her for all her looks and admitted she looked forward to her posting them each week. Oh and then Maddy Morphosis dialled in to announce Salina won the Golden Boot of the season – for the metal street sign look – with her thrilled to finally win something.

Talk returned to the hateful drag bills with Robin speaking at Yale Law given most of the lawmakers have graduated from there, and Yale wanted to take a stand. Irene reminded everyone that the laws are not just targeting drag queens and they are actually designed to hurt the trans community, with Sasha agreeing that she feels particularly targeted and nervous about the bills, but also reminded her sisters that it means they are doing something right because they have them scared. Thus legislating against people living their lives and bringing joy to the world. Oh and then the queer Connecticut Caucus dialled in to thank their queens, with Loosey breaking down to see how much support they have from their little state.

Ru offered everyone a chance to clear the air, with Irene asking Mistress if she made up that Loosey said she was shocked Irene had had filler given she was saggy. Anetra admitted that in addition to the lightbulbs, she also stole Amethyst’s baby – for Snatch Game – before talk turned to social media backlash, with Mistress thanking the sisters that spoke out when she and Luxx were getting hate. We then got a recap of the top four’s run, most importantly being the moment Anetra walked that fucking duck into our hearts. Luxx’s stunning Visage couture runway perfection, Mistress’ camp ridiculousness in Daytona Wind and Sasha in the rumix, since they had to narrow it down to just moment. Despite the fact she slayed each and every week.

Once the dolls finished their kiki, I confidently stomped onto stage – maybe channelling Anetra’s duck – and tapped Luxx on the shoulder to let her know it was her time for a celebratory catch-up. Of course she wondered why the future winner of the season wasn’t saved for last, until I explained that I based the last two dates on wins – All Winners All Stars style – meaning since Anetra and Sasha had more, she had to settle for the reunion. And while she didn’t love my TEDTalk style explanation, her mood drastically improved upon seeing the Luxx Tiknoir Lasagdon come out of the oven.

While this number is new to my heart – thanks again, Alan Carr! – there is no denying its perfection. The fusion little UK number is the perfect combination of spicy, sweet and comforting, which coincidentally is how I would describe Luxx’s run this season.

Enjoy!

Luxx Tiknoir Lasagdon
Serves: 6.

Ingredients
olive oil
1 onion, diced
6 garlic cloves, minced
2 tsp ginger, minced
3 tbsp garam masala
1 tbsp cumin
1 tsp smoked paprika
1 tsp chilli powder
1kg chicken mince
800g canned diced tomatoes
3 tbsp butter
1 tbsp muscovado sugar
2 cups milk
½ cup Greek yoghurt
salt and pepper, to taste
1 lime, zested and juiced
2 tbsp flour
250g dry lasagne sheets
3 cups mozzarella, shredded

Method
Preheat the oven to 180C.

Heat a lug of oil in a Dutch oven over medium heat and saute the onion, garlic and ginger for five minutes, or until soft and sweet. Add the garam masala, cumin, paprika and chilli powder and cook for a further minute to release the flavours. Add the chicken mince and cook, breaking up lumps with the wooden spoon for a few minutes, or until browned. Stir in the canned tomatoes, 2 tablespoons of the butter, muscovado sugar, ½ cup of milk and the Greek yoghurt. Bring to the boil, reduce heat to low and simmer for about ten minutes to reduce slightly. Season to taste and stir in the lime zest and juice. Remove from the heat.

Meanwhile, melt the remaining butter in a saucepan over low heat. Once foamy, stir in the flour and cook for a couple of minutes. Remove from the heat, season and whisk in the remaining milk, before returning to the heat and bringing to the boil for a couple of minutes. Remove from the heat.

To assemble, add enough meat sauce to cover the base of a large baking dish. Layer over a third of the pasta, followed by a third of the bechamel and then, you guessed it, a third of the cheese. Repeat the process from meat, to pasta, bechamel and cheese until you finish with a cheesy top before transferring to the oven to bake for 40 minutes, or until cooked through. Remove from the oven and allow to rest for a further half an hour before devouring, like an icon.


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Jaxfruit Tacos

Main, RuPaul's Drag Race, RuPaul's Drag Race 15, Street Food, TV, TV Recap, Vegetarian

Previously on RuPaul’s Drag Race the dolls learnt the Maxi Challenge – or should we say, Maxine Challenge – would see them star in the sequel to Daytona Wind. And while the first one was super fun, it was mostly due to the fact the dolls were gagged by the surprise gas. Despite having the power to assign the roles, Aura opted to give up the campy, lead role and take on a quieter part which she quickly proceeded to bomb. Though Luxx noted, she probably would have bombed any and all roles she had. Jax meanwhile was forgettable and missed all the Drag Race references as Mistress – who inherited the lead role – slayed the game and took out victory. Only narrowly though, over her nemesis Malaysia, as the duo played off each other perfectly. Ultimately Jax and Aura landed in the bottom and like Angela Bassett, Jax did the thing and took out the lip sync, as Aura joined the win to elim club.

Before cursing them to be haunted by the ghost of her father on her way out the door. Backstage Jax was obviously a little nervous about said curse, given she was ultimately the one that sent Aura out the door, though was glad to prove she is going to be very difficult for the girls to send home. After a brief moment celebrating Mistress’ win, Loosey turned the attention back to herself as she complained about only being safe. When it is what she deserved. But whatever. I prefer Spice’s delusion that she is entering her top era.

The next day Spice was still busy trotting around despite Ru and Michelle’s hate, while Loosey asked the girls without a win how angry they were. Which obviously led to all the girls eviscerating her for going full Milk and raging over being safe. Before she could spiral any further, Ru dropped by to announce that for this week’s Maxi Challenge they’d all be lip syncing, in a battle royale LalaPaRuZa in full assassin drag. And by the end of the night, one of the dolls will be going home. They immediately split up to beat their mugs, with Mistress super confident knowing Spice, Loosey and Marcia are the easy marks, though admitted to fearing facing off against Sasha or Anetra. As she should, TBH.

We quickly pivoted to the Mainstage where Ru, Michelle and Ross took their places on the panel as the girls lined up to hear the rules. Which were super simple, given they just need to survive one of the eight lip syncs that were about to unfold. And Ru, Michelle and Ross’ coffee enema energy, which is always a highlight to me. Bruno entered the mainstage to toss his balls before selecting Malaysia as the first one to lip sync, meaning she was able to pick her opponent. Ultimately opting for Marcia. Which meant Marcia had the power to pick the song, going with Anitta’s Boys Don’t Cry. And while Malaysia was expecting to steamroll, Marcia had tricks up her sleeves, flipping around the stage and giving sass as she hit every lyric. And rightly took out the first victory, sending her back to safety while Malaysia would have to lip sync again in the next round.

Next up Bruno grabbed Loosey’s ball with her also picking the easy mark in Spice, with Spice selecting Joan Jett’s Do You Wanna Touch. Sweet Spice tried her darndest, bringing all the energy to the performance however Loosey’s choice proved wise as she took out victory and joined Marcia Cubed backstage. But yeah, make no mistake, the lip sync was boring. Bruno wheeled out his balls yet again, this time pulling out Luxx who opted to face Salina. Who in turn chose It’s All Coming Back to Me Now by my sweet Celine. Aka a song she does on the reg back home. And girl, it showed as while Luxx gave all the drama and emotion, it was definitely Salina’s show as she rightly entered the top nine and sent Luxx through to the next round.

Bruno’s balls decreed Mistress was next who chose Jax, feeling she was more likely to pick the song she wanted, Tell It To My Heart by the iconic Taylor Dayne. And despite Jax proving herself to be a bit of an assassin so far, it was Mistress who stole the show, serving reveals, comedy and drama and ugh, she was perfect. And lucky that the judges have already seen Jax’s tricks and flips twice already. As such, Mistress was deemed safe and Jax was forced to lip sync again. Which gagged the safe girls, before Mistress mocked Loosey for doing a shit job and just getting lucky with her opponent. Most importantly, the final round was an absolute battle royale as Anetra and Sasha faced off with the former picking I’m In Love With A Monster by Fifth Harmony. And holy shit, did mother Sasha and Anetra feed us. Every letter was hit, the dolls were on the beat, every flip and trick was perfection and gaggy and well, TBH, I feel like both of them should have been deemed safe. But sadly only Sasha was sent to safety, while Anetra was forced to lip sync again.

Bruno’s balls lined up Malaysia to kick things off again, this time going with the safest bet on stage in the form of Spice. And while Spice wisely chose Don’t Go Yet by Camila Cabello because Malaysia wouldn’t know the lyrics, neither did she. And well it was an adorable mess as they both tried to serve something, before Spice ultimately resorted to the conga. Which obviously led to Malaysia joining the safe girls. Where she promptly pretended she didn’t pick Marcia because she thought she could beat her. But more importantly, the last lip sync would be a throuple as the remaining dolls faced off to Vanessa Williams’ The Right Stuff. With Luxx proving that rage can take you far, as all three of the girls hit every lyric and absolutely dominated, but Luxx just clearly had more fire to stay which pushed her over the edge and sent her to safety.

Meaning Spice, Anetra and Jax took the stage assuming they would battle as a trio before Ru gagged them with a twist, courtesy of Bruno’s balls. You see, he would pull a queen’s name out of his sack and then that queen would get to choose which one of her sisters would be safe. And because Anetra doesn’t enjoy murdering puppies, she gagged the dolls by sending Spice to safety and opted to battle Jax in the final round. And while Jax vowed to make Anetra regret her choice, as soon as Finally by Cece Peniston started playing, it was clear Anetra is really one to be feared. She gave camp charms, sexy moves, hairography and all the attitude as she ran every phrase flipped over the stage before walking the duck all the way to safety, ultimately sending Jax home.

As I pulled Jax in for a hug backstage, I reminded her that a Lalaparuza also cost a lip sync assassin their spot last year – RIP Jasmine – meaning that she kinda, sorta did all she could to navigate the producer’s newest favourite storyline. I reminded her that despite being in the bottom twice in the season, she truly got the chance to shine. I mean, who will be able to forget her skipping with her hair? Not. Me. Plus to misquote Batman like Simon, it is always better to die a robbed goddess than live long enough to become a person production rigged the season for. Which was enough to cheer her up before she even saw the banquet of Jaxfruit Tacos.

I would argue that Mexican is the best cuisine, be it Tex Mex to the more traditional variety. And these jackfruit numbers are even better, since you can pretend they’re a healthy option. Spicy and smoky, the pulled pork-ness of the jackfruit melts in your mouth and makes you want more.

Enjoy!

Jaxfruit Tacos
Serves: 4-6.

Ingredients
1 tbsp olive oil
1 onion, diced
4 garlic cloves, minced
800g canned jackfruit in brine, drained
2 tsp ground cumin
2 tsp oregano
2 tsp chilli powder
1 tsp ground coriander
1 ½ tsp smoked paprika
½ tsp cinnamon
400g canned diced tomatoes
1 tbsp tomato paste
1 avocado, diced
1 tomato, diced
1 lime, zested and juiced
1 cup rice
1 ½ cup chicken stock
12 taco shells

Method
Preheat the oven to 160C.

Heat the olive oil in a large skillet over medium heat and sweat the onions, stirring, for about five minutes or until soft and sweet. Add the garlic and cook for another minute before stirring in the jackfruit, breaking up with a wooden spoon to roughly shred it. Cook for a further couple of minutes before stirring in the cumin, oregano, half the chilli, coriander, one teaspoon of the paprika, the cinnamon, canned tomato and paste. Stir to combine and simmer for ten minutes, or until fragrant and reduced.

While that is simmering, combine the avocado, tomato and lime zest and juice in a bowl. Set aside. Next, pop the rice in a medium saucepan with the stock and remaining chilli and paprika. Bring to the boil, reduce to low and cook covered until all the liquid has absorbed. Remove from the heat and leave the lid on to allow it to steam a little. Finally, cook the taco shells in the oven for a few minutes, or until golden and crisp.

To serve, fill the tacos with rice, the jackfruit and avocado salsa – adding cheese and sour cream, if they are your jam – before devouring.


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Sharlami Vinson

Snack, TV Recap, Australian Survivor, Street Food, TV, Australian Survivor: Heroes V Villains

Previously on Australian Survivor we witnessed a tribal council so epic, I don’t even understand how we attack recapping it. Before we got to that point, Gerry survived his 48 hours at the Villains tribe before opting to return to the Heroes, despite not really vibing with them. The Villains then went on to lose another immunity challenge with Simon locking in the numbers to get rid of George as soon as they returned to camp. Sadly for him, Jordie was ready to make a move on Simon and get rid of him and his attitude, given it was way too toxic for most of the tribe. While everything looked set to send Simon out of the game with an (alleged) idol in his pocket, JLP surprised everyone with an individual immunity challenge at tribal council, which Simon promptly won. With his back against the wall, George blew everything up, telling Simon that Jordie had betrayed him and told everyone about his idol, while he would be playing his idol for himself. He then fractured Simon and Stevie’s bond, begging Simon to save sweet Stevie by playing his idol for him, and after breaking Stevie’s heart by refusing, the Spice Girls gagged the tribe by voting out Fraser instead.

The next day things were, how do you say, tense? Except for Stevie and Shiz, as he pulled the girls aside to share how grateful he is to them for saving him as he broke down in tears and ugh, it was beautiful. And what a full circle moment, since Shonee blindsided him their first season and he spent the first week hungry for revenge. 

Everyone came back together, hanging out in silence before Simon felt slapping Jordie over the back of the head was the best way to de-escalate the tension. Jordie once again proved to be mature, biting his tongue before Simon finally asked him to talk and then promptly berated Jordie for making the choices he made. While all Jordie knew was that he was absolutely screwed, though given he has Alex’s sister/Jay’s ex Sam Frost waiting for him at home, pregnant with their first child he has all the motivation he needs to dig deep and embrace the chaos. As such, Jordie caught up with Shiz by the well to bond over the trauma of tribal council while Shonee admitted that they need to work together because she actually trusts him.

Oh and then our Queen straight up pocketed a hidden immunity idol without a note or anyone noticing, despite it being right in front of all of them.

We did a check in with the Heroes where the tribe was so zen, they were straight up playing cricket and living their best lives. Gerry however wasn’t loving it, admitting that he only came back to the tribe for Sharni given they are so tight, however he knows he feels better among the Villains. The tribe caught up to grill him and while they were trying to be chill, Paige grew pretty tense in her line of questioning and as such, Gerry let slip that while he is with them, if they cross him, he will fight back. He then called out Sam for his stupid comment at tribal before Benjamin asked him why he voted for him, with Gerry pointing out he has a silver tongue. Which led to Ben asking him what, if anything, he told the Villains with Gerry iconically pointing out he didn’t really need to say anything, given the Villains cantell the alphas are on the top.

Benjamin admitted that he was grateful for Gerry pointing it out, given it clarified a few things in his head and ideally some others. Since he knows he is on the bottom, and wants to get himself into a better position. As he was whipping up food for the tribe, he found the Heroes version of Simon’s non-idol and while he was smart enough to realise that without a note, he has nothing, he viewed it as a clue and got to work hunting. All around the coconut hidden near their well. And damn, please find it my King – I need mum and dad to both jag idols in the one episode.

The tribes joined Jonathan in the jungle for the latest immunity challenge where Simon and George aired their dirty laundry for the Heroes. After George finished things by letting them know Simon still has an idol, JLP announced that in pairs the tribes would hold three blocks off the ground between their feet with the last tribe to have a block elevated taking out the win. So yeah, congrats Villains, Shonee has you! But if you want to talk about the challenge, David and Sam, Sharni and Paige and Ben and Gerry held up the blocks for the Heroes, while Jordie and Simon were paired, as were George and Stevie while Shiz were clearly poised to be the winning pair. 

Nearly instantly Gerry dropped out for the Heroes while Simon fought back tears as he dropped after ten minutes. George and Stevie soon followed, leaving Shiz to fight for their safety while the Heroes had two pairs going strong. And by strong, not really as Sam dropped leaving Sharni and Paige to fight for the Heroes. After an hour Paige developed a cramp and started to hold back tears as Shonee calmly told Liz to keep it together. JLP noticed our Queen was holding firm, asking how she went last time she did this challenge with Shonee pointing out she did two hours and she could easily do it again. Not that she needed to, as Sharni and Paige dropped after an hour as Liz told the Heroes they have plenty of excess meat they can cut off. Before she and Shonee held the idol arm in arm and skipped out of the jungle. 

While in contrast, Paige bitterly whispered to anyone that would listen about it being Sharni that dropped the block, not her. And who cares, you lost?

Back at camp Flick tried to lift everyone’s spirits, congratulating them on fighting so hard while Sharni agreed that when pain comes into it, it is all mental. Everyone split up to start scrambling, with Paige’s approach being to burst into tears to Nina, Flick and Hayley. And while they all tried to make her feel better, they also didn’t care who dropped the block, just that they were going to tribal council. The meat heads meanwhile quickly locked in the vote for the only queer, minority male on the tribe with Sam pretending it is because he is shifty. Which, ugh. They then loudly – and TBH, aggressively – pulled Gerry over, with Sam essentially telling him that he has to vote with them given he is close to the bottom. They locked in Sharni too, though warned her Gerry could be collateral damage should Ben play an idol. While they looped in the rest of the girls on the plan, Sam was shockingly astute enough to be nervous that said plan could easily fall apart.

Hayley caught up with Shaun only to be interrupted by Ben and while they pretended they were keen to get rid of Gerry, Ben knew he was in trouble and got back to hunting. Before finally, FINALLY, jagged the legit hidden immunity idol. And just like that, I can breathe. Sadly for him, it was all caught by Matt. Who immediately took the information back to Sam. Which, eyeroll. The duo then went person to person, telling them this means they should stick to the plan. Sadly when the information got back to Sharni, she only just learnt that it was a confirmed split vote on Gerry and as such, was not on board. Knowing he didn’t exactly want to burn the idol too soon, Ben caught up with Paige, who once again accused Sharni of throwing the immunity challenge. And as such, Ben had some leverage he felt he could use that night.

At tribal council Paige continued to push the narrative that she didn’t drop the block as Sharni started to straight up shoot her daggers while Flick cautioned Paige to hold her tongue. While Sharni calmly spoke about being super comfortable in the challenge, she then pointed out that Paige is playing a blame game when they should have celebrated the fact they made it an hour. While Paige denied blaming Sharni, Ben spoke up and called Paige on her lie and that she straight up accused Sharni of throwing the challenge. When she once again denied it, Ben got up to talk to the returnee females to tell them Paige was right and that they should change the vote from him to Sharni instead. He then flagged it with Shaun, while Sharni spoke about her disappointment about how things are blowing up on her.

Gerry spoke about feeling like he hasn’t had much luck with the Heroes, while Sharni spoke about the fact she has been nothing but honest with everyone and has been upfront about the fact she won’t write Gerry’s name down. Benjamin then pointed out that it is important that honesty and loyalty doesn’t make them naive before making a pitch to the tribe that they are now coming up to an important phase of the game and as such, they need hardened players around to survive further. Meaning this honest, loyal game isn’t really going to serve them any longer.

With that the tribe voted, Ben wisely played his idol – to mine and Hayley’s delight – leaving Sharni to tragically be eliminated. Much to Paige’s shit eating grin and my utter heartbreak for mother. As soon as she arrived at Loser Lodge I pulled her in for a massive hug and shared how disappointed I was that she and Ben ended up on opposite sides of the vote, given Paige would have been such a lovely pre-swap boot. But alas, she always has her successful acting career which I see prospering after she joins the latest Neighbours reboot. Alongside me, of course! Which is what I pitched to her as we smashed a freshly made Sharlami Vinson.

I know, I know – making salami from scratch is a big ask, when it is so easy to buy from the deli. But it is something I encourage everyone to try at least once in their life for a special occasion like a date with Sharns. Spicy, smokey and packed full of flavour, this simple little number is a delight.

Enjoy!

Sharlami Vinson
Serves: 2 dear friends.

Ingredients
2 tbsp Morton’s Tender Quick Meat Cure
2 tsp kosher salt
1 tbsp black pepper, ground
2 tsp mustard seed, ground
1 tsp chilli powder
3 drops liquid smoke
2kg beef mince

Method
Combine the Morton Cure and salt with two tablespoons of water to dissolve before adding the pepper, mustard seed, chilli and smoke.

In a large bowl, combine the mince with the spicy cure mixture and scrunch with your hands until it has come together.

Pop two long pieces of cling film on the bench and form the meat into a firmly packed cylinder in the middle of each. Tightly wrap with the cling to form a salami shape. Wrap the cylinders in foil before transferring to the fridge to chill for 24 hours to cure.

Once it has adequately cured, preheat the oven to 160C.

Carefully remove the salami from the wrapped and place on a lined baking sheet. Transfer to the oven to bake for about an hour, or until cooked through. Then either allow to cool completely or devour it still warm.


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Irene Hamdubois Helper

Main, Pasta, RuPaul's Drag Race, RuPaul's Drag Race 15, TV, TV Recap

Previously on RuPaul’s Drag Race, which started out as a teeny, tiny show whose first challenge was filmed in the car park behind WoW opposite the Jim Hensen offices – which I’m not sure is a legit fact, but for some reason I think it is so let’s run with it – turned into a global phenomenon. Icons were born, legends were made, moments were gagged, we were left gooped and Ruple and Co. became bonafide Emmy powerhouses. But most importantly, it gave us back rolls, Alyssa’s secret, do-wa, Aja jumping from there, a confession to killing Judy Garland and a Snatch Game throwback to that moment, absolving said veteran of said murder. But that was then and this is now, as Season 15 is ready to take its lap. Sadly without chocolate.

Womp womp.

First to enter for this fifteenth (main franchise) crown was Irene Dubois looking like a ginger COVID virus and well, she is hot out of drag and is Bosco’s drag sister, so I love her. She was followed by Luxx Noir London looking like Bowie and Dynasty era Joan Collins had a baby whose hair was inspired by Ariana Grande. So again, I love her. As the duo got shady, Aura Mayari arrived and gave glamour as she vogued her way into the Werk Room and straight into my heart. And loins, out of drag obviously. Giving cousin IT by Cher from Clueless, we met Marcia Marcia Marcia and after she flicked her hair back to reveal she was rocking the iconic broken nose look, I live for her.

Though not as much as I love people clocking her as looking like (a) Jan.

As she was busy regalling her new sisters with her love of Ariana Grande and serving it on Broadway thanks to her BFA (like Jan, TBH), we were joined by Anetra who is giving off fun punk showgirl vibes and well, I love her energy so much and feel like she is going to slay. Which I hope isn’t the kiss of death because my support usually curses trajectories. They were joined by Malaysia Babydoll Foxx serving the sluttiest depression kitty I have ever seen and I love her. LOVE. She is charming, cute and has a voice like velvet. Princess Poppy arrived serving Art Simone’s twink sister in the best way possible. Though her sticking her ears inside themselves scares me because I’m a child. Then Sasha Colby happened and well, yeah, I stand by what I said earlier, crown her. Now. She was serving as a Hawaiian warrior queen and had the energy that she was ready to have fun and slay.

We then had Ornacia make her triumphant return and ugh, I LIVE. Wait, no it is Ariana Grande. Whistle tone queen, icon, legend and well, let’s just say, I’m as gagged as the dolls.

As Marcia started to hyperventilate, Ariana gave the dolls a hug and thanked them for bringing so much joy to the world. While Luxx in turn thanked her for Break Free which TBH, is correct. Ariana regalled everyone with tales of her previous time on the judging panel and encouraged them to take in every moment and enjoy the journey. Ru then stole her thunder, dropping by to welcome his newest daughters to the race and officially announce the doubled up prize. Oh but first, they would have to compete in a little throwback Mini Challenge doing a sexy photoshoot washing the car. With the Pit Crew, so swoon. 

The boys started spraying themselves as they washed the car before Irene dropped by and bathed in it, living her bukkake dream and TBH, that is the only way to do it. Luxx meanwhile got wet in all the wrong ways though thankfully still served. Aura was ready to touch them all and ugh, it was hot and I love it, while Marcia served good girl gone bad. Backstage Marcia was thirsty for boy Irene while Luxx was scared of her, meanwhile Anetra was drowning out in the carpark and had Ru cackling. Malaysia was heartbroken to ruin her good drag but hot damn did she serve while Poppy got her holes filled and Sasha tried to give supermodel, despite not loving the fact she didn’t get said moment.

As everyone dedragged they all clocked Aura as the trade of the season – including Aura – and were positively shocked that Marcia looks exactly the same in and out of drag. Talk turned to what the other group would look like before Ru interrupted them talking about Irene’s passion for  reading everyone to announce that she took out the win in the Mini Challenge. Much to Luxx’s surprise. Ru then filled the dolls in on the fact their first Maxi Challenge would be a little talent show titled One Night Only (said with jazz hands, obvi). And in addition to their individual performances, they would have to choreograph an opening number together.

The group quickly ventured backstage and talked through their skills, with Marcia pushing to take the reins in the choreography and while Aura tried to add to it, Mother Sasha quietly watched on, knowing that she would end up fixing whatever they came up with and get her new kids over the line. As the kids continued to fight back and forth for control Irene joined Sasha in asking one of them to just back out and let the other take the lead so they don’t get stuck with two different choreographies. 

As Group 1 descended into chaos, the crew reset the Werk Room just in time for Salina EsTitties arrived giving banjie energy and was totally jacked up on Mountain Dew and I live for it. She was quickly joined by Amethyst serving 2000 pop tween, claiming herself as the first viral TikTok queen to make it to Drag Race. Jax arrived ready to cheer the house down and called herself the Simone Biles of drag, so yeah, I stan. They were joined by Loosey LaDuca who looks like a campy, nice version of Sh3rry Pi3 in blonde. Which isn’t a read, despite how it may sound. Mistress Isabelle Brooks was up next serving short, goth Eureka and I love everything about her. Robin Fierce joined them looking like a stunning woman in tan and ugh, I love her. Oh and she and Amethyst have a past and while I was ready to ship, she told me I can’t, so that is that. We then got a double arrival as Sugar and Spice trotted in serving actual dolls and while Amethyst thought she was the TikTok superstar, these girls are the thing.

Though Mistress will not give them the pleasure of knowing she knows them.

As the dolls recovered from learning they are only bedroom queens, Sugar opened up about wanting to be part of the drag community and wanting friends which is equally sweet and heartbreaking. We then got another Ornacia entry, this time with the legit Vivacious who announced Ru’s arrival to welcome the rest of her daughters to the competition and put them to the test in their Mini Challenge, the drag race wind machine photoshoot classic. Salina was up first and served sex and speeding as her face blew away, Amethyst gave Timezone realness while snacking on leaves before Jax was all erotic, no auto. Mistress was smizing the house down, Loosey lived her Tippi Hedron fantasy through feathers while Robin was perfection, whether the fan gave her a beard or not. 

As the twins made it to the stage for their shoot, the other girls kikied about Sugar and Spice being inexperienced with Mistress opening up about how underwhelming they are to her. And while everyone reminded her they were cute and sweet, she felt like not knowing what wig glue is was a mortal sin. And well, I’m here for the shade. Sugar meanwhile was having fun on the bike, serving silly and ridiculous before Spice ripped off her wig against Ru’s advice, serving hairography with a shower cap. They rejoined the dolls as everyone dedragged with Sugar and Spice gagging over their sisters and praising them for looking so different out of drag. Mistress kinda admitted to reading them and threw down a challenge for them to impress her, while they just spewed talk at the girls, trying to make friends and well, I love everything about them despite myself.

Ru made yet another return to announce Loosey took out victory in the Mini Challenge, which emboldened her to declare she will be the first person to win every challenge. Which already ius not the case. Ru then gave them a spiel about the talent show before sending them off to the rehearsal space, where the other dolls finally appeared to be making progress. Well, until Ru dropped by to kiki and threw the two groups together. The factions lined up like the jets and sharks, ready for two to become one and put more choreographers amongst the queens before Ru announced that unlike last year, one of them will be going home before the end of the week.

After Ru departed the groups introduced themselves and sat down to get to know each other, with Sugar and Spice monologuing about their lives and while they annoyed everyone else, I love their lack of self awareness. Also Sugar kinda looks like young(er) Austin Butler minus the lingering accent work. Group 1 then got up to show their newest sisters their choreography with Mistress laughing through it with her soon-to-be-bestie Sugar. While Marcia tried to push through, Malaysia cut her off and then everyone started to fight before Mistress cut them off and asked them to focus on the task at hand because dancing is her weakness and she doesn’t want to bomb. Then she and Irene got sassy and Sugar and Spice started quietly laughing together.

Elimination Day arrived with the dolls finally unpacking their gear and finding a station with everyone laughing it up and being silly. Sugar and Spice meanwhile just focused on beating their mugs because they take so damn long. Irene meanwhile measured up her wig against Luxx’s to confirm whether her entry was 40 inches. Defeated, Luxx then joined the twins to get ready, bonding over being social media queens and how it really is the only way they can start when they aren’t old enough to go to a club. Sugar then noticed Mistress and Irene were sitting together and was shocked that the enemies elected to get ready together, leading to the older girls explaining shade and how being a working queen works. Loosey, Anetra and Amethyst meanwhile were talking about their talents with Loosey opening up about her original song, while Anetra was keeping her cards close to her chest. Oh and then we learnt Irene is making ice water.

While Sugar and Spice were still nowhere near being ready to go on while everyone put on their finishing touches.

Ru, Michelle, Ross and Ariana took their places on the panel as the dolls made their debut for the opening number which was a campy, pageant delight and ugh, I’ve missed this show (in the two weeks we went without it). Malaysia meanwhile opened up the individual performances, lip syncing the house down to an original song and while it was repetitive, Bryce came out in gold speedos, so I love it. Spice meanwhile was silly and cute, having Ru and the dolls in hysterics, so well done babe. Luxx hit every line and lyric on her lip sync and was honestly just a delight. Though the gradual split really made me love her. Mistress went boxing for her lip sync which was a win when she pulled out a RuPaul chocolate bar and nearly slid off the stage.

Loosey gave us something different by singing live and while I wanted to live for it, to quote the great Coco Montrese, find a key. Anyone will do. Marcia danced her way into my heart as a horny nerd sexing it up for a portrait of Ross. Robin was energetic and worked every corner of the stage as we went back to lip syncs before Irene bombed, hard, while making a glass of iced water and while I knew what she was going for, that wasn’t it. Anetra then followed it up by bringing the house down as she duck walked all over the stage as she lip synced to her original song – Walk the Duck – before straight up moving into karate chopping through boards. AND THEN KICKING A BOARD IN HALF.

Poor Sugar had to follow that up and while her lip sync was fun and silly like the sweet version of her sisters, she didn’t karate chop. Despite that, the fact she and her sister served it wore down Mistress which is a great win. Princess Poppy meanwhile gave parasite puppet lip syncing realness and it was perfect, before Salina gave red carpet lip sync into street glamour before referencing Will Smith’s slap so if Anetra doesn’t Anetra, I’d say this was a win. Amethyst then won my heart lip syncing to All Around the World as a drunk mum with a baby tethered to her back before Aura gave a fierce lip sync and while she had all the attitude, it felt a little flat by comparison. Mother Colby then lip synced to Zombie in a straight jacket and ugh, she is perfection. It was moody, it was fierce, it was powerful and well, the kids best watch out. And then Jax came out and lip synced before skipping with her own ponytails, which is yet another win for me.

And that was before she backflipped from the back of stage to the front, proving she really is the Simone Biles of drag.

When it came to the Who Is She? runways, Irene came in goth alien dominatrix, Luxx gave glamour pastel vixen going from the races to the boudoir before Aura gave all black Rita Repulsa, in all the right ways. Marcia gave sexy pastel prep, Anetra was an iridescent warrior, Malaysia gave sexy angel lounge singer in the hottest club in heaven before Princess Poppy gave lollipop ballerina delight. On and then Sasha gave the ultimate flex, rocking the gown she won Miss Continental in. Salina gave blue jean baby, Amethyst was a slutty, lilac Sailor Moon, Jax was NYC street in all the right ways before Loosey gave a glamorous gown version of Britney in Toxic. Mistress was iconic in a bejewelled, red cowgirl corset, Robin was an ice queen in shimmering baby blue, Sugar gave slutty Belle and ugh, I hate that I love Spice gave the other side of the look – kinda – with whore Ariel.

Luxx, Aura, Malaysia, Princess Poppy, Sasha, Mistress, Robin, Sugar and Spice were all sent to safety before Irene was praised for looking good on the runway though read for giving absolutely no humour in her performance. Marcia received universal praise for giving humour and dancing perfection, though told to give more than a streak of lip gloss when it comes to make-up. Anetra rightly was universally beloved for being perfection from start to finish, despite only learning to duck walk today. Amethyst was read for showing the baby too early in her performance, though she was praised for looking cute. Despite her lack of padding. Jax too got wall to wall praise, particularly for rolling her eyes while effortlessly doing acrobatics meaning poor Loosey was read for her performance, despite looking stunning.

Backstage the safe girls celebrated making it through the first week, particularly Princess and Robin who were shitting their pants. Talk turned to who was the best with everyone agreeing Anetra owned the show, while Poppy lived for Jax. Robin in turn congratulated the twins for surprising everyone with their sickening performances, with everyone rallying around and finally welcoming them into the drag family. This turned into a conversation about the stigma about the social media dolls and while Luxx pointed out social is a live portfolio, Malaysia explained she only questioned if they could translate their talents to the stage. Talk turned to how great Sasha’s performance was, with her opening up about her trauma while praising her father for raising her.

The dolls started to open up about who they knew before the season which was only an excuse to bring up the fact Robin and Amethyst briefly dated back home. That obviously summoned the tops and bottoms with Irene praising the tops for killing it before Amethyst announced she is definitely in the bottom, though hopefully not against her sister Loosey. That led to Loosey breaking down, heartbroken to have bombed, leading to the girls rallying around and praising her for killing it and pointing out they really only wanted her to lip sync so she could make the performance bigger. That led to Irene admitting that she will totally be the one in the bottom with Amethyst given they just hated her performance.

After everyone agreed that Anetra would totally be winning, Ariana dropped by to kiki with the girls and literally gave them the sweetest advice and well, I guess I’m all in on being an Ariana stan now? She bid the girls adieu, leaving Irene and Amethyst to rehearse their lip syncs and get their heads in the game.

Ultimately Marcia and Jax were sent to safety as Anetra took out the first victory of the season while at the other end of the pack it was Loosey that was saved, leaving Amethyst and Irene to battle it out for safety to my girl Ariana’s 7 Rings. While Irene leant into her alien kooky aesthetic, it was clear the song was perfect for Amethyst and her general vibe. Irene twerked and gave sex, which sadly wasn’t enough as Amethyst was saved and poor Irene joined the Porkchop Club.

Backstage Irene was rightly disappointed to be gone so soon and not get to show the world more, though I reminded her – as I do each season – it is more memorable to be a first boot than saying a mid-comp queen, giving you an air of mystery and an underdog spirit. Which seemed to be the pep talk she needed, thanking me for always supporting her – I am Bosco’s drag great-grandmother thrice removed, so we’re family – as we sat down to smash a heart bowl of Irene Hamdubois Helper.

Not to be confused with Australian hamburger helper – which is essentially seasoned breadcrumbs – this tweaked version of Half Baked Harvest’s take on the American classic is near perfection. Packing a punch of spice (sadly without sugar) and heat, while velvety smooth and creamy, it is an easy mid-week number to warm the cockles of your soul in winter.

Enjoy!

Irene Hamdubois Helper
Serves: 4.

Ingredients
2 tbsp olive oil
1 onion, diced
6 garlic cloves, minced
500g beef mince
kosher salt and pepper
1 tbsp tomato paste
1 tsp chilli powder
1 tsp smoked paprika
1 zucchini, grated
1 carrot, grated
500g small shell pasta
2 cups beef stock
300ml cream
1 cup cheddar cheese, grated
½ cup parmesan cheese, grated
chopped fresh parsley, to garnish

Method
Heat the olive oil in a dutch oven over medium heat and saute the onion for five minutes or so, or until soft and sweet. Add the garlic and cook for a minute before adding the mince and breaking up with a wooden spoon until browned, or about 10 minutes. Season with a good whack of salt and pepper to taste.

Stir in the tomato paste, chilli and paprika and cook for a minute before stirring through the zucchini, carrot and pasta to coat. Stir in the beef stock and cream, bring to a gentle boil and reduce heat to low to simmer until the pasta is cooked through. Once the pasta is al dente, stir through the cheeses, adjust the seasoning – you’ll probably need more pepper, less salt – and cook until everything has combined.

Serve piping hot with some token parsley for the appearance of health and devour, happily.


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Romesco Saucobar

Condiment, Sauce, Survivor, Survivor 42, TV, TV Recap

Previously on Survivor 18 new castaways were marooned on the lush islands of Fiji where one by one they were eliminated, starting with the tragic loss of Jackson and Zach within the first few days. They were followed out the door – yes, this is happening – Marya, Jenny, Swati and Daniel before three became one as the tribes merged, or so they thought, as once again, the merge was a bit of a gag. That cost Lydia her game before the official merge saw Chanelle ascend to the throne as Queen of the jury. She was soon joined by Rocksroy, Tori, Hai, Drea and Omar before the final five were sent to a new beach to start over. Despite winning an advantage for the challenge, Lindsay couldn’t take out victory and landed on the jury bench before Romeo narrowly snatched final immunity and took Maryanne to final tribal council with him, leaving Mike to earn his place and sending Jonathan from the game to become the final juror.

The final three awoke on Day 26 to watch the sunrise, proud to have made it all the way to the end and to get the chance to argue their case. Though Mike was worried about how he would be able to convince the jury of his game, despite all of them giving confessionals about really needing him to own the fact he is the biggest snake left in the game. Romeo meanwhile was proud of playing from the bottom the entire game, with the jury admitting that his ability to persevere and outlast everyone has been very impressive. Maryanne meanwhile was readying herself to scream all of her achievements from the rooftops and while the jury were thrilled to see Maryanne make it to the end, they worried about her ability to articulate her superior game. And TBH, focus on the task at hand.

With that, the final three arrived at the final tribal council where Probst quickly explained the proceedings for the evening. Omar kicked off the discussion about their social games, praising all of them for making it to the end and encouraged everyone to outline what they did to deserve the win. Tori spoke about Mike’s passion for trust and integrity, while Maryanne was charming and fun while Romeo was quiet, asking how accurate her read was and whether she missed anything. Mike leant straight into his love of trust, while Maryanne countered that she has always taken the game seriously, desperately trying to downplay her threat level as all the young people kept getting voted out when they tried to make a move. While Romeo just agreed that yes he was paranoid, but that he kept throwing hinky votes out to keep people riled up.

That sadly upset Hai, who accused him of gaslighting him and ugh, Hai destroyed him. Despite his attempts to apologise and them ultimately moving on, I still worry for Romeo in this final tribal. Giving him hope, Omar asked Mike about some of the other times he lied that he hadn’t copped to, including the blindside of Drea. While Mike tried to talk around things, Chanelle jumped in to call bullshit on the situation, leading to Mike getting more and more desperate as he tried to explain that he only crossed people that crossed him. Which Hai pointed out was mainly Omar feeding him lies. Jonathan tried to get Mike to fight before Drea cooled things down and reminded everyone that they all lied, but the fact of the matter is that Mike’s social game was just on point.

Talk turned to Maryanne’s sloppy social game pre-merge, with Maryanne admitting she hadn’t realised how much her tribe hated her before the merge but once she realised, she rightly course corrected. Lindsay then gave Maryanne the chance to explain who she pulled in herself, with her highlighting her skills in taking out Omar. And while Jonathan tried to take ownership of the move, she slapped him down and rightly took credit. Because trust and believe, it was her moment.

Rocksroy kicked off the physical portion of the game, with Maryanne talking about her contribution around camp, weaving fronds and prepping the fish. Mike meanwhile highlighted his work ethic, powering along all season to look after his tribe. While Romeo admitted he has never camped and just learnt to swim, and as such, he is proud of himself for persevering and finally snatching immunity at the final four.

Drea kicked off the strategic portion, telling the final three that this is what will decide her vote. She asked each of them to outline their biggest move with Romeo talking about his fake immunity idol and winning the final challenge. Oh and that he took Maryanne because she didn’t have a strategy. Mike meanwhile spoke about orchestrating the blindside on Hai, with him admitting that sometimes his emotions got the best of him before he realised mid-sentence that he wasn’t as honest as he thought. Maryanne meanwhile shut it down, explaining that getting rid of Omar set her up with a bunch of final three combinations she could navigate. She then outed her idol, impressing everyone by keeping the secret and clearly articulating how removing Omar is the thing that took her to the end.

Romeo meanwhile broke down, disappointed to have had to play the game from the bottom and to not show his real self throughout the game. Though he was proud to have never given up and make it to the end, and to finally be able to live his life as a proud gay man. Mike spoke about being proud of himself for overcoming the generational barriers, competing with the younger kids and making the bonds to get to the end. While Maryanne once again dominated, sharing how she learnt to stand up for herself and to not self-sabotage, which is why she voted out Lindsay. She cried about having to turn on a friend, though finally knew that she had to take the risk of getting rid of her, to give herself the best shot at winning.

With that the jury voted and once again, everyone was gagged to discover that Jeff would be reading the votes right then and there in the middle of Fiji. Sadly for Romeo, none of them were for him as he found himself becoming the second runner-up of the season.

As Jeffy pop and co reset to film the reunion, I pulled Romeo aside and gave him a massive hug for all that he achieved throughout the season. And for giving a surprisingly dominant performance in the final tribal council. Romeo perfectly articulated how he managed to navigate the game despite being on the bottom the entire time, while also going on a massive journey to self-acceptance. Which is not bad for 26 days of work! And while it didn’t jag him the win, it was more than enough to win him my heart and a big ol’ ramekin of Romesco Saucobar.

A little bit tangy with a touch of earthiness and punch of sweetness, this Spanish sauce is the perfect accompaniment for pretty much anything. Make it a bit thicker and you’ve got a punchy dip, thinner and it works perfectly with some charred chicken.

Enjoy!

Romesco Saucobar
Serves: 4-6.

Ingredients
150g chargrilled capsicum, drained well
½ tsp sweet smoked paprika
¼ tsp chilli powder
20g flaked almonds, lightly toasted in a dry pan
1 lemon, zested and juiced
5 large garlic cloves, crushed
1 tbsp olive oil
1 tsp kosher salt
¼ tsp freshly ground black pepper

Method
Pop everything into the blender and blitz until smooth.

Decant and either down, dip or drizzle on something and devour – your choice!


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Sichuanyx Chilli Oil

Condiment, Dip, Drag Race España, Drag Race España 2, Sauce, TV, TV Recap

Previously on Drag Race España the dolls starred in los Javis’ neauvo rusical Holy Drag Camp! And well, while we literally saw the entire show, the quality held up and I kept my complaining to a minimum. Despite having a killer voice, Juriji struggled while Jota disappeared into the background as her sisters shone. Oh and Onyx was just there, but given her character was a painting, there wasn’t much she could actually do to stand out. While Sharonne continued to deliver killer performances, it was Estrella who was rewarded for killing each week as she took out her first victory of the season. Juriji and Jota landed in the bottom too and while Jota put everything on the line, Juriji absolutely slayed the lip sync, saved herself and sent sweet, young Jota packing. 

Backstage Diamante couldn’t give a shit to have lost their youngest sister, while Juriji paid tribute to Jota’s bravery and how talented she is at such a young age. Despite not lip syncing, Onyx was disappointed to have received negative critiques from the judges, while Sharonne desperately tried to remind them how talented both the bottom queens are. While Diamente, again, just wanted Juriji to wake up and put up, though was hopeful lip syncing was the push she needed. Everyone pivoted to praising Estrella on her well deserved win, before Diamante gave them all one final wake up Pearl moment, which is a pretty confident thing to do for safe.

They then all made out and snuggled and yeah, my basement was and continues to be, flooded.

The next day the dolls were doing their best animal impersonations, which is a vibe, before speculating what challenge they would be facing this week. Supremme soon arrived to put them out of their misery by immediately throwing them into this week’s Mini Challenge where they would have to recite poetry in front of a big fan. More importantly, the Pit Crew arrived in mesh underwear, so obviously I stopped paying attention on anything else. After they all hornily reached into the Pit Crew’s sacks to grab a poem, they had 20 minutes to merrorise the poem and get into some quick drag before the Pit Crew wheeled out said fan to blow on their face while they recited their erotic poetry.

As is oft the case when the Pit Crew around, we all proved to be winners, though apparently it was Onyx that took out victory for keeping her dignity, winning a huge haul of sex toys.

Supremme then dropped the big news though, as the dolls learned that for this week’s Maxi Challenge they would be playing Snatch Game! The dolls quickly split up to start prepping their looks before Supremme dropped by to learn who everyone would be playing with Diamante hilariously doing wrestling mask RuPaul – don’t get this franchise cancelled, Diamante! – Marina will be playing Antonia Dell’atte, Onyx shared she would be doing Jauna de Loca or Valencia’s neighbour, which got a big reaction from Jruiji, given the latter is her number one choice. Sharonne will be playing Veronica Forque – who died after the show was shot, thus her receiving a tribute at the top of the episode – while Drag Sethlas will be Carmen Lomana, Estrella meanwhile was playing Paquita Salas and Venedita will be Miguel Bose.

We quickly pivoted to set where Jedet and Eva Hache were lined up to star as guests, and while it is always harder to get the references in foreign franchises, it was clear that Sharonne and Juriji were slaying the game. While Onyx was well and truly bombing, alongside Diamante, who made RuPaul as proud as Trixie before her. And while the rattlesnake noise tells me she was bombing, I lived for Drag Sethlas vocal fry as Carmen Lomana. Oh and Venedita’s wackadoo, anti-vaxxer was hilarious in a way that transcended language.

Dia de eliminacion arrived with Diamante terrified about landing in the bottom, while the dolls were proud of how funny Juriji proved to be. They then split up to get prepped for the runway and for some of them, hopefully save themselves from their terrible performances. Onyx opened up to Juriji and Drag Sethlas about her depression and the struggle to accept her weirdness as her strength. Marina and Estrella joined the conversation, talking about how great it is that they can all be themselves and are celebrated for it and ugh, again, they are all too sweet.

Supremme, Ana, y los Javis were joined on the panel by Goya winning actress, Maria Leon for the Spanish Dolls runway where Marina opened the show as a neon, plastic disco delight and damn, she looked good. Diamante was a voodoo ragdoll, Sethlas went nude, serving genderless Barbie realness, while Onyx was perfection as a porcelain doll. Sharonne was serving perfect face as a pillow doll before revealing herself as Teela from Masters of the Universe. Juiji was a glam, goth porcelain doll, Venedita was perfection as a Matador souvenir doll, while Estrella was a creepy, crazed paper doll before revealing herself to be a sexy blow-up doll.

Ultimately Marina was sent to safety alongside Estrella before the judges read Diamante for being terrible in Snatch Game, which is something she freely agreed with. The judges wished Sethlas chose her other Snatch Game option, before Onyx was read for being completely stuck in her head, though they loved her runway. Sharonne once again received universal praise for everything she did this week, particularly for nailing the characterisation of Veronica. Juriji too received universal praise, with the added bonus being that she surprised the judges with how good she was. Oh and they lived for everything that Venedita did this week too.

Backstage the safe dolls were busy chatting away when the tops and bottoms joined them to talk things through, with Diamante sure that she would lip syncing. While Sharonne admitted the choice between Sethlas and Onyx joining her is a tough one, with both sure it would be them. Juriji meanwhile was proud to show off her skills while the dolls questioned if there was anything Venedita can’t do!

Despite Juriji and Venedita giving very strong performances, it was Sharonne who took out her second win of the season. At the other end of the pack, Sethlas narrowly avoided the bottom leaving Diamante and Onyx to lip sync for their lives. As soon as Arrasando by Thalia kicked off, both the dolls went off. They hit every lyric and danced around stage and while Diamante gave the more traditional, ballroom-style lip sync, I was living for Onyx’s silliness and campy moves and as such, I was absolutely heartbroken when she was told to sashay away.

Like Onyx, I am riddled with self-doubt and each day is a struggle to self acceptance so when we met up backstage, I quickly pulled her in for a massive hug. I mean, yeah, I also find Onyx ridiculously attractive, so the hug was just as good for me as it was for her, but I knew she needed to remember that she is talented, loved and to know other people could see it. And while it may not seem like it, I feel my Sichuanyx Chilli Oil truly proved it to her.

As hot and spicy as Onyx herself, this oil packs such a deep, earthy punch. Perfect for dipping, drizzling and in a state of disappointment, I guess, drinking, the oil’s warmth carries on long after it passes your lips and acts as a delicious hug for everything that passes. Food wise, obvi, because it is spicy.

Enjoy!

Sichuanyx Chilli Oil
Makes: 1 ½ cups.

Ingredients
1 cup vegetable oil
1 cinnamon stick
4 star anise
2 bay leaves
2 tbsp Sichuan peppercorns
2 tbsp chilli flakes
1 tbsp chilli powder
1 tsp salt

Method
Pop the vegetable oil, cinnamon, star anise, bay leaves and Sichuan peppercorns in a saucepan over low heat. Cook for about half an hour, or until lightly fragranced. Crank the heat to high and cook for a a couple of minutes before removing from the heat.

Combine the chilli flakes and powder, and salt in a bowl and strain the oil over to combine. Stir and leave to infuse for a couple of hours before serving. Or devouring.


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KJ South Waustin Chicken Pizza

Australian Survivor, Australian Survivor: Blood V Water, Main, Pizza, Snack, Street Food, TV, TV Recap

Previously on Australian Survivor Jordie somehow continued to evade certain doom and levelled up by going all in with Josh. Unaware that Josh was gladly riding the middle to get as far as possible. At the immunity challenge, Chrissy completely gave up on her own chances and instead coached Josh to win yet another immunity challenge, making Mark super nervous given everyone would clearly want to flush the idol. You know, should they ever believe he had that second one. After lying to literally everyone and telling them once more that he didn’t have an idol, he then had made an elaborate song and dance of playing said idol to send Jordie home. Only he never received a vote as the tribe piled them on Jordie instead, meaning it was a waste. And damn was Sam pissed.

Back at camp the final five celebrated making it as far as they have, while Chrissy frankly was just shocked to still be in the game. Which honestly, same, because she thought tribal council was called tribunal at the start. Chrissy meanwhile was thrilled to not only be free of Jordie but also that Mark burnt his idol for no bloody reason. She then explained how everyone left in the game absolutely loves her and wants to work with her, meaning she will gladly continue to stroll all the way to the top three. Meaning she either wins or is getting blindsided as the biggest threat tonight.

The next day the tribe had a joyous sleep in with everyone a little shell shocked to still be sleeping on the ground after 45 days. Mark meanwhile was feeling a little nervous and very stupid to have made such a massive blunder with the idol, admitting that he would be devasated to make it this far only to go home. As the tribe laughed at their luck that he burnt his idol, we got an emotional package about how he only left his son at home to earn the win and yeah, he is winning. Shut. It. Down. He caught up with KJ, Josh and Chrissy with them agreeing that they need to make sure Shay doesn’t win immunity and so they can get rid of her lest they want to be beaten at the final immunity challenge. 

After Josh reiterated just how desperate he was to win, particularly now that his partner is pregnant, we checked in with KJ who knew that Josh and Mark would both be gunning for her next round and as such, got to work locking in an all women alliance. While Chrissy wasn’t sure that she would be able to trust Shay to take her over the boys, KJ reiterated that there is no way either of them wins if the boys are at the end with them and as such, they need to at least try to move forward with Shay. Speaking of Shay, she knew her number would be up unless she wins immunity and as such, she was ready to fight. Because she can’t trust Chrissy to ever turn on the boys.

Just like that, the final five joined up with Jonathan for the second last immunity challenge of the season where they would each have to run up and down some stairs dropping balls into a ramp and catching them at the end before they smash their tile and eliminate them. With the last person standing scoring immunity. Everyone was obviously a-ok only having to manage a single ball, leading to Jonathan to add their second as Shay quietly ran the numbers in her head and damn I hope her maths gives her the win. 

Everyone was still in it on the third before a lapse in concentration led to KJ missing one and dropping out of the challenge. Josh’s bad maths eliminated him, leaving Mark, Shay and Chrissy to battle it out. Chrissy then cooked it as she dropped in her fourth ball, watching two roll back-to-back and eliminate her from the challenge before Mark straight up dropped a ball after catching it, handing Shay immunity. As Mark looked enraged and threw a ball at his tile in frustration, ignoring Shay and not even congratulating her.

Back at camp Shay was thrilled to have managed to save herself while everyone gave her their half-hearted congratulations. Chrissy laughed about how she was a hot mess, while Mark and Josh were straight up enraged to have to come up with another plan. Shay meanwhile told us that the person she does not want to face at final tribal council is Josh and as such, she was going to wield any influence she has left to get rid of him tonight. Josh meanwhile was feeling the pressure and while he knows Mark needs to go, he also would prefer to keep him around at the final four because it makes him the target instead.

Nervous of an all women’s alliance, Mark and Josh suggested their only path forward would be to pull Chrissy in and take out KJ instead. With that Josh pulled Chrissy aside and while he was firm that they need to get rid of KJ, she pointed out that she needs to finally pop something on her resume and as such, needs to make a move on one of the boys rather than follow them. KJ and Shay meanwhile were unsure whether they were able to trust Chrissy to turn on Josh and as such, KJ approached Mark to float the idea of getting rid of Josh. Which he readily agreed to, despite planning to stick with Josh and Chrissy to get rid of KJ instead. Which is bad for one of the boys games, though I’m not sure which one. Feeling uneasy about how quickly Mark jumped to their side, KJ then caught up with Chrissy to float the idea of turning on either of the boys. And while I have little faith, she continued to talk about how important it is for her to make a move and maybe, just maybe, she will finally jump ship and give us the winner we deserve. Ladies and gentleman, her.

Chrissy then caught up with Mark, admitting that Shay hasn’t even spoken to her since the challenge. While she was stuck firmly in the middle between the boys and the girls, Josh was confident he’d be able to convince her to stick with him. Josh and Mark went for a walk in the bush, with Josh admitting to being nervous about trusting in Chrissy this round. Which made Mark more and more nervous. And more and more likely to jump to Shay and KJ to get rid of Josh as the only way to guarantee his safety. Josh started to pop up every time KJ and Shay spoke to Mark, with KJ masterfully asking Mark what Sam would tell him to do at this moment. With Mark rightly pointing out that Sam would want Josh gone immediately.

While Shay still didn’t care who went out of the duo as she just wants all the women to make it to the end.

At tribal council Josh admitted that Shay winning immunity did ruin everyone’s plans, while Shay was obviously thrilled to only have one more endurance challenge – her favourite – between her and the final tribal council. While Mark admitted to being terrified now that he doesn’t have his idol. Chrissy mentioned there is always time for a blindside while Shay opened up about being quite popular back at camp. She then got distracted as Josh and Chrissy whispered behind her, with Josh working overtime to remind her they need to stick together should they have any chance of making it to the end. While Mark whispered to Shay and KJ to just stay firm and not worry.

KJ spoke about how they need to think about the jury management, as Josh reiterated to Chrissy that KJ is far more likely to get votes at the end over Mark. Josh then started whispering to Shay, leading to KJ opening up about feeling nervous though kinda being used to it since she is constantly a target. KJ then whispered to Shay, assuring her that she feels like Mark will stick with them while Josh tried to point out that everyone is a threat going into the final immunity challenge. Though in a sexist way. Chrissy tried to talk to the jury before admitting that there is still time to build a resume, which appeared to make Mark more and more nervous, admitting to Jonathan he will be voting with his gut tonight.

With that the tribe voted and thanks to Chrissy voting for Mark by herself, things were tied up between KJ and Josh meaning Chrissy, Shay and Mark had to revote. And given Chrissy was angry about KJ and Shay changing the vote from Mark and not telling her, she joined Mark in sending KJ from the game. As Josh smugly laughed at the jury.

I was obviously heartbroken to see KJ enter the Jury Villa, given she would have made such a compelling winner. I mean, do I wish she made some moves a little earlier than she did? Sure! But at the end of the day, she has fought from the bottom from early in the game, overcame the chaos of Sophie’s game, voted OUT her sister and then pivoted just one spot up whenever she needed to move herself from being the target. It was a hell of a story and a strong game that played into her strengths, which was more than enough to earn her a KJ South Waustin Chicken Pizza.

Though once again, I felt super guilty that a stinkin’ (great) pizza cost one of my faves the game! That being said, it is packed full over flavour and is oh so calming, it is hard to be angry for too long.

Enjoy!

KJ South Waustin Chicken Pizza
Serves: 2 dear friends.

Ingredients
2 bases as per Pizsa Zsa Gabor
⅓ cup passata
oregano and basil, roughly chopped, to taste
olive oil
400g chicken breast, cut into strips
1 tsp cumin
1 tsp smoked paprika
1 tsp chilli powder
1 tomato, diced
1 red onion, sliced
½ red capsicum, diced
2 tbsp jalapeños
½ cup corn kernels
½ cup black beans
⅓ cup sliced black olives
a small handful coriander, to taste
mozzarella, to taste

Method
Prep the bases as per Zsa Zsa’s instructions. Heat a lug of olive oil in a frying pan and cook the chicken for five minutes, turning, or until golden and crisp. Add the cumin, smoked paprika and chilli powder, stir and cook for a further minute before removing from the heat.

Preheat the oven to 180°C.

Smear passata over the prepared bases, sprinkle with the herbs, tomato, red onion, capsicum, jalapeno, corn kernels, black olives and coriander before topping, generously, with mozzarella.

Transfer to the oven and bake for fifteen minutes, or until bubbly and golden.

Serve and devour immediately, hopefully without burning your mouth.


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Vegetable Samontha Gash

Australian Survivor, Australian Survivor: Blood V Water, Snack, Tapas, TV, TV Recap, Vegetarian

Previously on Australian Survivor the trio of returnees were ready to create some chaos, though sadly, were still tragically outnumbered. Thankfully, at the auction, KJ scored herself an advantage after bidding on a pot of tea. After the alliance locked in the vote against Jordie, Mark and Sam left their idols back at camp before KJ gagged the tribe by announcing her advantage was to send three people back to camp prior to the vote. After shoo-ing away Chrissy, Mark and an immune Josh, the purgatory trio finally had the numbers but after Sam convinced them all she had an idol in her pocket, they flipped the vote to Jordan and sent him from the game instead.

Back at camp Chrissy, Mark and Josh were shocked to discover that Jordan went home, with Josh particularly seething and as such, was ready to get revenge on anyone involved. As Josh straight up threatened Dave, Mark jumped in to tell him how stupid he is while Sam rightly praised him for making a move. She tried to calm down the enraged duo and Chrissy, while Josh just focused on how stupid their move was. When it was literally the only bloody option. Get a grip, man!

The next day the mood was still super tense, though Jordie was living his best life. Full of pride to have gotten KJ out of her shell and ready to dominate the game. He opened up about the logic to target Jordan, while Chrissy was telling the tribe how she originally thought three people were going home, so admitted to being a little relieved to have just lost Jordan. While KJ was telling Sam about how proud she was to have gotten the full Survivor experience, Josh continued to carry on, muttering about how she just painted a target on her back and that he would be getting her back ASAP.

Sam and Mark caught up to celebrate being the last couple left in the game, while Sam questioned whether they should get rid of one of their idols by burying it. She opened up about doing a double degree in law and acting, which yeah, shows she can argue a case and is a good liar but mainly I just find it a super fun fact. The marrieds agreed that while Josh desperately wants to take out KJ, that is not in their best interest and as such, they need to keep what is left of their alliance together and get rid of Jordie.

Josh meanwhile continued to be angry, but assured us he will use that rage to take out immunity again and get rid of that newly pesky KJ. Chrissy dropped by to chat to Josh, and admitted that she had time to think and suggested now would be the right time to take out Mark and Sam. But try as she might, laying out logical argument after logical argument, Josh just couldn’t bring himself to even try to flush their idol(s). And now would be a great time to remind everyone that he was sold as a mastermind for a couple of episodes.

The tribe joined Jonathan for the latest immunity challenge where they would roll a ball up a ramp and try to build a line of blocks at the bottom so that once built, the ball knocks them over like dominos until it is long enough for one of them to drop in a bucket at the end. Mark, Josh and Jordie got out to the earliest of leads, while Shay straight up smacked herself in the face with the ball before Jordie knocked over his stack. As Dave tried to close the gap, KJ dropped hers, followed by Mark and well, I’ll cut to the chase. Everyone was back and forth, knocking over their stacks before Mark rebuilt and secured himself immunity.

Back at camp things were once again intense as Sam, Mark, Chrissy and Josh joined together to plot a new move. While Mark rightly pointed out that he doesn’t want to align with anyone that had already been voted out, he suggested that Josh or Chrissy would be able to lure Dave back to their side and take back control. Speaking of Dave, he and the purgathree were continuing to plan to get rid of Sam. Jordie pulled Josh aside to float the idea of him joining their side and get rid of the final couple and then continuing to work together until the end, alternating being the one to decide who should go home.

While Josh agreed that neither Sam or Mark would be willing to take him to the end, he still felt it was a ‘dog move’ to turn on them. Which again, is the game. But him turning on them, based on his history, is the perfect cover to avoid the idol being played. Dave traded out with Jordie, apologising to Josh for voting out Jordan before throwing Sam under the bus as the one person that pushed for Jordan to go home. And as such, Josh finally felt angry enough to make a move. A very logical, and arguably the only move he can make if he has any interest in winning. Josh started to simmer based on this new information – which again, shouldn’t have been needed – and seriously considered turning on Mark and Sam.

Even though Sam was solely acting out of self-preservation. But who cares, we’re getting a move, so let’s ignore the facts.

Speaking of which, the couple left the shelter to figure out their plan of attack. Sam rightly pointed out that tonight’s tribal council will decide how the endgame will look. And if they lose, their alliance will go out back to back to back. Mark meanwhile felt that Dave will gladly flip back to their alliance, given he doesn’t even like Jordie. Though they did agree to take the idols to tribal council as insurance, while Sam was confident they wouldn’t vote for her out of fear of the idol. Which is exactly what they were locking in, as Jordie met up with his allies to tell them that he is hopeful Josh may finally flip to their side.

At tribal council Josh spoke about his pain at having lost his cousin, though was grateful to have an alliance that he trusts. He continued to talk about his desire to get revenge, and was grateful to not have to worry about any stupid advantages. Dave spoke up, talking about how Sam played everyone at the last tribal council which confirmed her fears that Dave wasn’t with them. This led to a lot of whispering back and forth, with Josh starting to get paranoid about not being on the right side of the numbers and as such, questioned whether he and Chrissy should flip.

Sam started to worry and suggested that they will need to play an idol, which Mark quickly shut down though did admit to Jonathan that tonight’s tribal council is very important. Mark and Josh then whispered about whether they should be concerned, with Josh assuring him to just play it safe. Jordie praised Josh for playing a good game and reacting appropriately to Jordan’s boot, while Sam reminded everyone that Josh has been completely loyal throughout the game. Chrissy and Josh then whispered, with Chrissy pointing out that Jordan appeared to be giving Sam deathies and willing them to vote her out. Before Jordie and Sam each reiterated their last minute pitches.

With that, the tribe voted, Josh told Mark to play the idol for Sam but when he didn’t give them a reason, they hesitated and missed the opportunity which proved to be a huge mistake as Josh had joined with the outcasts to boot Sam from the game.  Much to the absolute delight of the jury.

As soon as I saw Sam walking into the Jury Villa, I ran to her and pulled her in for a massive hug. While at times the game has been boring, it was in no small part due to the absolute dominance of Ms. Samantha Gash, our paranoid queen. I congratulated her on returning to the game having learnt her lessons from her first (iconic) season, which led to her controlling the entire pre-merge portion of the game and wisely not targeting Sandra. While yes, her post-merge game was essentially falling on her sword for Mark, it is hard to fault in a Blood vs Water season as the duo have to decide what path gives them the best opportunity to win. And given the amount of alphas on the jury, it makes sense to prioritise Mark because sexism will always come into play (read: Chrissy losing to Ben).

She was so moved by my words, we quietly sat down at the table and smashed a big batch of Vegetable Samontha Gash.

Lightly spiced and packed full of my favourite veggies – namely peas and potatoes – these babies are near perfect. Crispy pastry and piping hot potato. Need I say more?

Enjoy! 

Vegetable Samontha Gash
Serves: 6-8.

Ingredients
1 tbsp vegetable oil, plus extra for brushing
1 onion, finely chopped
4 garlic cloves, crushed
150g potato, finely diced
100 carrot, finely diced
100g frozen peas
1 tbsp curry powder
½ tsp chilli powder
½ cup vegetable stock
3 cups flour
1 tsp ground cumin
⅓ cup melted ghee
¾ cup warm water

Method
Heat the oil in a frying pan and saute the onion and garlic for five minutes, or until soft. Add the potato, carrot, peas, curry powder and chilli and cook for a minute before adding the stock. Bring to the boil, reduce heat to low, cover and simmer for half an hour, or until the potato is tender. Leave to cool.

While that is getting real cool boy, combine the flour with a good pinch of salt and the cumin. Slowly add the ghee and water, kneading as you go to create a smooth, firmish-not-sticky dough. Cover and leave to rest for half an hour.

Preheat the oven to 200C.

To assemble, split the dough into ten pieces and roll into discs. Cut each disc in half and shape into a cone. Pack with the filling and seal the ends with a dab of water to form a triangle. Place on a lined baking sheet and continue until the filling and dough are all gone.

Brush the samosas with vegetable oil and place in the oven to bake – because I’m still scared of frying – for fifteen minutes, or until golden and crisp.


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