So if Adam was upset with me for calling him a diva the other day, Noni was absolutely furious that I lowered my standards to hang out with Ads over her to mark Australia Day. I mean, the phone call I received was similar to Tyra’s ANTM season 4 meltdown at Tiffany.
In her defence though, she has a point – she is Noni fucking Hazlehurst! Play School presenter (where we first became friends), actress, Logie Hall of Fame inductee, Cate Blanchett’s mother in a movie, best reader of Go The Fuck to Sleep and most importantly, host of Better Homes – the woman is a damn icon and not even my thirst is a good enough excuse for overlooking her for an Oz Day catch up.
“You foolish boy – how could you lower your standards and not spend the day with an icon slash national treasure?”
In what will probably be the only time it happened, I genuinely apologised and truly felt awful for making such a grievous error. More importantly, I was heartbroken to know that I had hurt Nones so much.
“Please Nones, head to the airport. I’ll buy you the cheapest seat available on the next available discount flight with minimal stop overs – I need to have you over ASAP to make this right.”
Surprisingly she declined my offer to pay, not wanting to transit to Brisbane from Sydney via PNG, Darwin, Cairns and Ballina, and was at my door by sun-down to catch up and truly honour our national holiday.
We gabbed about a mutual friend, fellow Play School presenter and dead-set legend Rhys Muldoon, plotted her escape from the horrific drivel A Place to Call Home and toasted to our decades long friendship with a deliciously potent Negroni Hazlehurst.
Fruity, strong and a little bit fresh, this drink is the perfect description for me … despite being named after No.
2 shots dry gin
1 shot Campari
1 shot red vermouth
twist of lemon
Place the gin, Campari and vermouth in a cocktail shaker with ice.
Strain into a chilled glass.
Add a twist of lemon peel.
Down in one gulp, like Noni would.