Previously on Australian Survivor sweet, gentle Kaelan continued to flex his muscle, as PD became his second victim at the reward challenge. Thankfully for his guilt, however, a torn bicep did not cost PD his place in the game. Though it did seem he would be sitting out of all the remaining challenges. Oh and Laura and Zara appeared to end their feud at the reward too! The Brain girlies were sick of Jesse and Ben’s bossiness, so planned to take them out. Sadly for them, I guess, they won immunity, sending Brawn back to tribal council. It was absolute chaos back at camp as while everyone seemed united against Paulie, they were all trying to use that to blindside AJ. Logan was gunning for him, as was Karin,, despite Zara trying to keep her calm. Luckily for them, they were all gagged when they arrived at tribal council to learn that Ben had quit off screen with zero context, saving them all.

We started the episode with an appearance from Jonathan – which always precedes something major – as the tribes were brought together for an epic challenge. As individuals, because they officially merged. Which was obvious based off the challenge structure alone, but I’ve digressed. Logan and Laura were giddy to be reunited, Kate was congratulating everyone while Paulie and Myles were thrilled to finally be on the same beach to serve twink and twunk. Logan told Laura about her idol as they hugged while Paulie felt like he was finally going to rise from the ashes. AJ, meanwhile, was ready to jag the world series poker championship that is Survivor. Seemingly unaware that, to reiterate, professional poker players traditionally don’t fare well in Survivor.

Rather than being sent back to camp, JLP actually put the newly formed tribe through their paces in the first individual reward challenge where they simply had to sloth on a rope the longest. With the victor scoring themselves a merge cocktail party with the guests of their choice. Kaelan’s second victim took his place on the sitout bench, before he was quickly joined by Laura, AJ, Karin and Jesse within the five minutes. Kaelan soon followed – this time without causing injury to anyone – followed by Kristin as Laura and Karin gossiped about who they could and couldn’t trust from OG Brawn. AJ meanwhile spoke to Kate to distract her from the pain of the challenge, while Karin read him for being super robotic and awkward. Myles was next to drop, followed by Morgan, leaving Laura, Zara, Kate and Paulie to fight it out. Despite the latter wriggling the entire time. Paulie eventually dropped, before Zara kicked off negotiations with the ladies to put an end to the challenge. With Logan and Zara dropping the instant Kate agreed to take them on the reward.

JLP pulled Kate aside to make her selections, sticking with the deal before she was given three more spots, opting for Morgan, Paulie and AJ. Thanks to his robotic chattiness. JLP then gave her one more ticket, with her selecting Kristin, which appeared to annoy Karin, despite the fact they hadn’t ever been on the same tribe. We followed the victors to their cocktail party where they smashed the snacks and grabbed their first drink. Right within sight of the merge camp, meaning the losers sat and bonded over their rage. Kate got to work bonding with the Brains she hadn’t met, hoping her time on reward would help get her out of the minority. She caught up with Logan and Kristin, with Logan telling them about the rival girls alliance and how they could now join together to take control. Karin meanwhile was heckling from the fire, frustrated to be slumming it with par-cooked beans, before chatting with Jesse about how chaotic AJ is. 

Eventually the two groups joined together with Logan thrilled to have Laura back, and now, was hoping to use their combined numbers to take control and stop voting how other people want. They caught up, with Logan awkwardly sending Kaelan away when they were talking. Zara was allowed to join, however, with Logan telling her that she doesn’t want to get AJ out yet, but when she does say she needs him gone, Zara needs to get on board or they are over. Zara then confronted Laura to make sure they cleared whatever air needed to be clear after non-advantagegate, with her explaining she didn’t try and steal it, but was actually trying to help Laura. While Logan watched on, telling us that Zara is quite challenging to deal with and as such, she is still on her hit list as soon as AJ is gone.

The next day the tribe bonded as they watched the sun rise before PD shared that before the game started, he asked a man what the Samoan word for stronger together is – and just like that, the Malosi tribe was formed. With that out of the way, everyone split up to continue the get to know you game. Well except for Paulie, who was fixated on reconnecting with the former Brawn to try and find some form of alliance, entrancing Jesse with a monologue about his strength. Paulie admitted that he was super nervous about AJ, though, given he was schmoozing his way around camp to rally the troops. Not to be outdone, Paulie caught up with Myles to find out why he has struggled to find allies with the icons talking about being chaotic to save themselves while in the minority and that also burns some bridges.  And ugh, please align, my queer kings. I need it. I mean, Myles told Paulie he would flourish as a bottom any day of the week.

Need. It.

The Graduates caught up under the cover of darkness later that night, with AJ in particular, thrilled to have his closest ally back by his side in the form of Myles. Both of them gloated about having all the information in the merged tribe, and while Myles was also nervous about Logan, he still wanted Jesse out first. I assume to reward the audience by having none of the idiots remain after merge.

No offense, Jesse. But you and Ben had some bad strategies. Really bad.

The next day the tribe reconnected with Jonathan for the first individual immunity challenge where they would have to balance on a seesaw, while maintaining three balls on individual tracks, with the last person standing taking out the win. PD obviously sat out immediately as everyone struggled to get their balance, so you assume one of our pilates girlies will take it, in the form of Zara and Logan, right? Laura was first out after touching her ball to readjust, quickly followed by Zara, immediately making me look as dumb as one of Ben’s strategies. And wrong. AJ soon followed, as did Kristin, Morgan, Karin, Kate and Kaelan. Everyone else lasted long enough to add their second ball, which immediately cost Paulie. After fifteen minutes, Myles dropped leaving Jesse and Logan to battle as they added their third balls. Despite some very near misses Logan continued to hold on until 20 minutes before Jesse wobbled out of nowhere, dropping and handing Logan victory.

And proving me right. Kind of.

Back at camp Logan rightfully thanked pilates for her win before gloating about not having to pack anything for tribal council. And the fact she has double protection with her hidden immunity idol, means she is ready to go on the attack. Jesse meanwhile was begging Morgan and Kristin to stick Brawn strong, with his goal to get rid of Zara. He went person to person to pull everyone in, hoping Myles would join them to take control. Logan caught up with Jesse and Paulie to float the plan to get rid of Zara, with her assuring Jesse that she is very keen to jump on board after what she did to Laura. Thankfully she knew that getting rid of Zara would upset Karin and ruin her majority, so she told us she was more likely to take out Jesse instead as it would actually not ruffle any feathers. 

Kate and Morgan were even more excited by the thought of getting rid of Jesse and taking control with the women. Though Kate was concerned about not having enough numbers and as such, she decided she needed to loop in AJ, so that she could get rid of Jesse tonight, so he doesn’t have the chance to find out about it. And surely it is a good move for AJ too, right? Womp womp, AJ was still fixated on zaddy Paulie and ugh, just stop. We need him to serve looks on the jury. Sexy, slutty looks.

Since AJ seems intent on ruining my life, he pulled the OG Brains aside to question why they aren’t splitting the vote, with them reluctantly agreeing to splitingt on Paulie. Paulie caught up with AJ to tell him that both of them need to lay low, and ugh, Paulie don’t try to help him. AJ quickly looped in PD about this new plan, saying that Paulie was the ultimate target, with PD okay, as long as Kristin was onboard. Wisely PD caught up with Kristin who warned him not to trust AJ, though agreed that Paulie also couldn’t be trusted and as such, neither of them really cared about who went home. Jesse and Paulie caught up in the ocean, hoping that their Brawn and Myles plan would come together to get rid of Zara. Making Paulie feel galvanised, confident and ready to take control. While Jessse was just thrilled to get revenge on Zara for what she did to Laura, seemingly unaware that he is the Brains real target.

As someone whacked Paulie in the face with a torch on the slow-mo walk to tribal council.

Paulie arrived at tribal council with a giant bandage on his head thanks to the aforementioned injury, courtesy of Laura rather than Kaelan, the resident brute. Zara spoke about how the merge felt like they’ve just started a second marathon, while AJ was just vibing, thrilled to have made a bunch of new friends and have new options. Kate agreed that being an open book is the only way to be, coming into merge, with AJ talking about how much he loves looking into fresh eyes. Specifically Kate’s baby blues, I presume. Logan meanwhile reiterated she is here to play the game and not just make friends, while Krsitin felt that the old tribes are dead and merge, truly, is a mixed bag. Zara meanwhile was grateful to have previously been on a tribe with every single person, hoping it would prove helpful in the long run. Which Jesse suggested made you a threat.

Paulie spoke about needing to switch things up post-merge, as predictability will get you voted out. While Myles diplomatically said he would be voting with the people that kept himself safe pre-merge. Not to be outdone, Jesse said his trust is through the richter scale. While Logan joked she would be voting for vengeance, before admitting she was just motivated by boring old solidifying alliances for the weeks ahead. With that the tribe voted, everyone held onto their idols before Jesse was gagged to find himself booted from the gang. Almost as gagged as Paulie, who copped five votes in the process.

As soon as Jesse arrived at Loser Lodge, I begged him to tell me why Ben quit, but sadly he gave me nothing. Which is kind of fitting, given that is what the editors gave the duo on the show. While we didn’t see much of Jesse on the show, he seemed like a really chill guy and well, sometimes, that is enough. That and a big old Kimjesse Egg Sandoonan.

While yes, this season has kind of been all about the sando – here’s to you, Zen and Nash – when they’re all unique, and all this good. It is hard to be angry. The kimchi and umami eggs work perfectly with the egg to give you a wholly satisfying meal.

Enjoy!

Kimjesse Egg Sandoonan
Serves: 1

Ingredients
1 tbsp unsalted butter
1 Beygel Knowles
2 tbsp kimchi, chopped
1 egg
½ tsp tamari
2 slices burger cheese

Method
Pop the butter in a skillet over medium-low heat until melted, and pop the bagel in a toaster.

When the butter is nice and foamy, add the kimchi to the skillet and cook for a couple of minutes, or until warm and the butter is rich and red. Whisk the egg and tamari together, before adding to the skillet, stirring until it is almost set. Using a spatula, shape into a sandwich sized portion and top with the cheese, cooking for a minute or two, or until it is melted.

Add the portion to the toasted bagel and devour, greedily, before the cheese drips onto the plate.


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