Crepe Susan Lucci

Dessert, Snack, Sweets

Say what you want about Susan Lucci – and fuck knows I do – she is one of the brightest, kindest and most generous people I’ve ever been lucky enough to call my friend.

Whether it is taking my acidic barbs like a champ, losing DWTS or more importantly losing the Emmy year, after year, after year, after year, after year, after year, after year, after year, after year, after year, after year, after year, after year, after year, after year, after year, after year, after year – break to win – after year, after year, Suze accepts it all and laughs it off knowing that she is a wonder.

I first met Suze in the 70s when I was hired as a soap-fight consultant on All My Children, the success of which led to me being hired by Az in the 80s when Dynasty started. Despite only working together briefly, Suze and I became fast friends and I was always first on hand after her Emmys losses to provide her with love and comfort in the form of cripplingly aggressive humour.

So Rami & I were getting ready to leave Kit’s house, and I L.A. when I gave Suze a buzz to see if she wanted to catch-up. Chuckling, she agreed – knowing the roast she was about to ensue.

“Suze – I just dropped Rami off after we celebrated his Emmy win. Can you believe winning an Emmy on the first go … let alone a Primetime one?!”

“Sarah Paulson broke her streak – she only took six losses before converting one!”

“You know how you lost the Emmy 20 times? Tatianna Maslany won on her second go for playing twenty characters. I guess she is almost as bad as you, right?”

Obviously I actually got cruel and made off colour jokes, but I’d rather keep our aggressive relationship. It truly is way too special to us.

Either way, it truly was a great opportunity to reconnect and provide my commiserations for the axing of Devious Maids and end of her career. Well, until I launch the soap idea I’ve been playing around with.

Oh and get Little Whorephan Andy: The Andy Dick Story on Broadway – I know she’ll be perfect for the role of Andy’s mother.

Anyway, the sweetness wasn’t just relegated to our bond but my famed Crepe Susan Lucci which – fun fact – were the only thing that could cheer her up after her numerous Emmy losses.

 

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Like Suze herself, the crepes are lithe, delicate and humble, and the sauce is hot and full of zest, leaving you happy, content and full of love – can’t wait to see you next Emmys, Suze.

Enjoy!

 

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Crepe Susan Lucci
Serves: 4.

Ingredients
100g plain flour
salt
2 eggs, 1 whole, 1 yolk only
300ml milk
1 tbsp unsalted butter, melted plus extra to fry

Sauce
100g caster sugar
35g unsalted butter
150ml orange juice
1 orange, zested
3 tbsp Grand Marnier
2 tbsp brandy
ice-cream, to serve

Method
Place all of the crepe ingredients in a jug and blitz with a stick blender until combined and forms a smooth, thin batter. Cover and allow it to sit for 30 minutes.

Once the batter is nice and rested, heat a small frying pan over medium heat, melt a small dob of butter and pour in enough batter to cover the base. Cook for a minute or so, carefully flip and transfer to a plate. Repeat until the crepes are done.

Meanwhile, in another small frying pan over low heat, melt the sugar with a tablespoon of water. Add the butter, increase the heat and cook for about five minutes, or until it is golden brown. Add the juice, zest, liqueur and brandy and simmer for a couple of minutes, stirring. Remove from heat.

Once it has cooled slightly, dip each crepe into the sauce, fold it in half and in half again – aka quarters. Layer a couple on a plate, top with ice cream and devour.

 

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Duck à la Solange

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Where do I even begin to explain the deep, complex, passionate platonic-love story between us and our dear friend SoKnow?

We first met So during the late 90s, when the world was quickly falling crazy in love with Beyoncé and the rest of the destiny’s children. SoKnow, filled with so much creative talent and energy, needed a way to burn through her untapped potential and joined the Upper Whitney Houston chapter of our Extreme Fight Club.

SoKnow excelled from a young age (picture a kind, likeable version of Ronda Rousey) and rose through to ranks where we met her at our EFC Centre in East Hollywood – did I mention we turned it into a religion/cult like Scientology?

Our bond with Solange was instantaneous and continued over the decades, with So becoming one of our most trusted friends, advisors and confidantes. She was the only person we trusted to keep Jay-Z in line after breaking the first rule of fight club, to not talk about fight club.

Obviously as founders, we are exempt from such rules. Jay-Z is not above the rules.

It was so great catching up with SoKnow after such a busy year – we hadn’t realised that our hard work had led us to our 100th recipe milestone, but you better believe she did.

Knowing our penchant for wanky gifts, she looked through Chloe Sevigny’s list of must haves (I mean, who doesn’t want to never speak to Jeanne Tripplehorn again) and arrived with a vintage half-kaftan by Vivienne Westwood Gold Label, an ironic art smock by Balenciaga le dix, imitation pants by Cacharel and stand-up comedy classes.

The only way we could repay her support, kindness and generosity was a meal of our famous Duck à la Solange.

 

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The 80s have had a strong impact on our lives, none more so than the delicacies of a kitsch kitchen. While I have always had a soft spot for the idea of Duck à l’orange, I hate orange in cooking. Enter, the sublimeness of SoKnow – crispy skin duck with Grand Marnier and sour cherry glaze to dial back the overpowering orange flavour, leaving you with a gloriously rich, tangy citrus to cut through the duck.

Enjoy!

Oh, and thank you for reading – you’re the best and you’re beautiful, but not as good or as beautiful as us. Obviously.

 

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Duck à la Solange
Serves: 2.

Ingredients
2 duck breasts
1 tsp salt
1 sprig rosemary, finely chopped
2 tbsp unsalted butter
1 cup pitted cherries
freshly ground black pepper, to taste
30ml Grand Marnier
½ cup chicken stock
1 tsp cornflour

Method
Score the skin of each duck breast with diagonal lines, cutting into the fat but not into the flesh and rub with the salt and chopped rosemary.

On a medium hot pan, seal the skin side of the duck breasts for about 10 minutes, skimming the fat if it gets too excessive. Once the skin has crisped, turn the breast over and seal on the other side. Cook the breasts for a total of about 20 minutes, turning for a few minutes to seal the remaining sides. Remove from the pan and leave to rest in a warm place for about 15 minutes.

Add the butter to the dark fat and cook to a nut brown before adding the cherries and a good whack of pepper. Deglaze the pan with the Grand Marnier and then add the stock and cornflour, increasing the temperature until the sauce has reduced down to a syrupy glaze.

Serve the duck on crispy fried potatoes or fried broccolini, doused in the cherry-citrus glaze.

 

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Jeff Grand Varnier Mousse

Dessert, Survivor: Cambodia - Second Chance, Sweets

Over the span of four episodes Jeff Varner has been dominating the game and setting the tone of the season however that two-bit floozy slash my Survivor nemesis Tasha (she cock-blocked my attempts to woo Joe pre-game) was able to wrangle Abi for two successive votes and boot out our dear friend and biggest non-idol-owning-or-person-named-Joe threat, Varner.

We have been friends with Varner for a long time, having met during the filming of Survivor: The Australian Outback where Annelie flew plane in the opening and I supplied Kel with my beef jerky. Much to Probst’s chagrin (we were not friends yet) we loitered around Ponderosa and joined the pre-jury trip where we bonded with Jeff over our mutual hatred for Colby (he had stolen Probst’s heart, obviously).

There was a brief stint following All Stars where we lost contact (we may have leaked spoilers AND blamed it on Varner) however we reconnected while working for Martha Stewert … where Annelie and I had nothing to do with her jail sentence. Trust us and please buy it, Martha can’t know anything.

Varner really took the fan vote to heart and turned up in Cambodia to play hard and reward everyone for his votes and even in an episode with Probsty’s wet dream, aka the DILFs glistening in underwear challenge, Varner was a star, battling hard in his final tribal council and walking into our open arms in Ponderosa with his head held high.

We tried to send a bug flying into Tasha during tribal to force a medivac but sadly it was Varner we were entertaining at Loser Lodge with a big vat of our Jeff Grand Varnier Mousse; well, what Probst left us – he wandered out of the kitchen repeating his commentary from the DILF challenge, Dietz, big and long, it will take some experimenting (hopefully we can join whatever he has planned).

 

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Like Varner’s short stint on the island, the mousse packs a punch with the Grand Marnier cutting through the velvety dark chocolate to woo even the staunchest of Jaffa critics over to the choc-orange side.

Enjoy – like we will when Varner gets his inevitable third chance!

 

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Jeff Grand Varnier Mousse
Serves: 6(ish).

Ingredients
6 eggs, at room temperature
350g (at least) 70% dark chocolate, preferably Valrhona
75g butter, cold
75g sugar
a good dash of Grand Marnier
a pinch of cream of tartar

Method
Separate the eggs, I prefer by hand for some visceral reason about connecting with your food however do it the easiest way you know, placing the yolks in a small bowl to the side and the whites in a large clean, dry bowl for a stand mixer.

Leave the eggs just hanging out on the bench and get to work melting the chocolate using a double boiler method (aka large bowl over boiling water – just make sure to avoid the bowl touching the water or it may cook rather than melt). Once the chocolate has melted, remove it from the heat and stir in the cold butter. Once the butter is fully combined, add a good dash (about a 2 tbsp, depending ultimately on how much orange flavour you want) Grand Marnier and 4 of the egg yolks. Leave to cool slightly.

Start beating the egg whites on medium in a stand mixer, adding the sugar and a pinch of cream of tartar the egg whites when they start to foam and continue to beat the until they form stiff peaks. Add in the two remaining egg yolks and beat until combined.

When the chocolate cream has cooled slightly, fold through the egg whites in three goes, gently folding through each addition. Spoon the mousse into cups/serving dishes – I went with ceramic mugs and espresso cups –  and refrigerate overnight.

Devour and enjoy, with or without what Probst has planned with his share.

 

As you can probably tell, we are very social but the fun isn’t only limited to celebrities! You can follow us on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, Tumblr and Google+.