Matthew Reeses Pieces

Dessert, Emmy Gold, Emmy Gold: Golden Family, Snack, Sweets

With my dates with Christina, Riz, Tat and Shelley done and dusted, it means that the end of Emmy Gold: Golden Family is almost upon us. And while I know that is something truly tragic for you all, be grateful that you still have these last two dates, one of which is with the iconic Matthew Rhys.

I’ve known Matt for 20 years now, after meeting on the set of Titus. I was having a torrid affair with Alan Cumming at the time, and given the healthy amount of nudity I fast became a fan of his … work.

While we were never intimate ourselves, Matt has always been a strong ally and when he was cast as Kevin Walker he got me a job on Brothers & Sisters as an intimacy coach, so that his relationships would be sincere. What a doll!

Since he has been busy working with my sworn enemy Tam Honks, we haven’t seen each other recently but I thought it was appropriate to bury the hatchet this Emmy season as he is a current reigning champ. And obviously he was thrilled, knowing how painful our feud had been on Keri.

Given it was his category, we focused on Drama with both agreeing that my dear Pete Dink will once again snatch Outstanding Supporting Actor, despite Nikolaj really deserving to get some love too. If Billy Porter doesn’t succeed him in Outstanding Lead Actor, we’ve agreed to riot and think that Killing Eve should take out Outstanding Drama since the final season of Game of Thrones doesn’t actually deserve it.

With that we held each other tight as he apologised for working with Tam and assured me that he tried really hard not to befriend him. While that may seem inadequate, I was feeling zen – and hoping to score his plus one – so accepting the apology and smashed a bowl of Matthew Reeses Pieces.

 

 

Crunchy on the outside, smooth and nutty on the inside, these little copycat Reese’s are bloody delightful. Definitely copycat. Promise.

Enjoy!

 

 

Matthew Reeses Pieces
Serves: 2 dear friends.

Ingredients
3 ½ cups raw caster sugar
2 cups muscovado sugar
1 cup milk
1 tbsp light corn syrup
1⁄4  tesp salt
1⁄2 cup creamy peanut butter
2 tsp vanilla extract
2 tsp liquid glucose
a few drops orange, yellow and brown food colouring

Method
Combine 2 cups caster sugar, the muscovado sugar, milk, corn syrup and salt in a saucepan and bring to the boil on medium heat. Reduce heat to low and cook, stirring infrequently until it reaches 115C. Remove from the heat, add the peanut butter and leave to rest. Not stirring at all.

When the thermometer reads 45C add the vanilla and beat with a wooden spoon until mixture is glossy.

Combine the remaining sugar with ½ a cup of water in a large saucepan over medium heat and stir until the sugar has dissolved. Crank to high and once boiling, quickly stir through the glucose and continue to cook until it reaches 115C. Remove from heat and leave to stand until it is no longer bubbly.

Pour the syrup into a large wet platter and cool until you can bear to touch it. Transfer to a bowl and knead with a wooden spoon, turning it back and forward until it is white and opaque. You can transfer to a bench and continue kneading by hand if that is easier until it is smooth. Form it into a ball and cover with a wet – but wrung – cloth and leave to cure for an hour or so.

Remove the cloth, split it into three and knead each with a few drops of food colouring to give each an orange, brown and yellow.

To assemble, melt the fondant one colour at a time and take a small piece of peanut penuche and dip into the liquid. Transfer to a lined baking sheet to dry, flipping after a few minutes. Repeat the process until you’ve got a bag of candies. That you definitely didn’t just buy.

 

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Keri Brussell Sprouts Salad

Salad, Side

Yep, apologies Felicity fans – I was the one that not only encouraged her haircut but the one that drunkenly took blunt scissors to it, after a bender in the meatpacking district or West Hollywood (I can not remember where it was filmed, just that I was hustling, off the wagon and loving it) and left Kez and the WB hairstylist to try and find a way out of the mess.

Thankfully Kez is as sweet and understanding as dear Felicity and didn’t hold it against me.

I first met Keri in 1995 when she had a guest stint on Married … with Children – my torrid affair with David Faustino was coming to an end after he (correctly) accused me of having an affair with Ed O’Neill, a down-to-peg Sagal and Marcy. Yes, Marcy – I am not attracted to Mandy unless she is in character.

As you could imagine, it was a very tumultuous time and dear Keri (incorrectly) saw me as a victim and quickly rescued me from the hell (of my own creation). You know how the story goes by now; celeb meets boy, boy pretends he isn’t toxic and tricks up and coming celeb into being his friend, boy relapses/is involved in scandal/is incarcerated and celebrity stands by him through thick and thin.

Even when he takes her hair from thick, to thin. Yeah … I am aware of how lucky I am to have found such supportive A-listers.

Despite hairgate, Kez has been on the up-and-up, which I like to attribute to her critically applauded turn in Waitress, which I financed out of guilt (I also funded a PSA called August Thrush but it was recut to make a poignant movie – I’m pretty kind). Now instead of her success depending on the length of her hair, she is being overlooked for Emmy Awards and battling whichever animal Andy Serkis most recently played.

It was such a treat catching up on the good old days and to see that her hair is as luscious as the world wants it to be (aside, must secure a shampoo commercial for Connie Britton and Kez). We laughed about Scott Foley’s obsession with me, Jeremy Sisto’s obsession with me … and, who could forget, Andy Serkis’ obsession with me, before sitting down to a light Keri Brussell Sprout Salad.

 

keri-brussell-sprouts-salad-1

 

Oh, I forgot … Cheryl Hines was also obsessed with me, but I’ve digressed.

While most people either hate or simply tolerate brussel sprouts, they would have to be my favourite vegetable. Even when steamed to within an inch of its life and the water is gone out the pan and now tastes smoked, slather on a knob of butter and those little balls have my heart.

Don’t even go there.

Anyway, it is autumn in Australia and despite still having sweat dripping of my balls on the daily, that means lettuce is now for suckers. Shred these little bad boys with some fried, salty bacon, sharp cheese and some nuts and you have a testicular inspired, culinary delight.

Enjoy!

 

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Keri Brussell Sprouts Salad
Serves: 6.

Ingredients
6 rashers streaky bacon, roughly diced
350g brussels sprouts
¼ cup red wine vinegar
1 clove garlic, crushed
3 tbsp olive oil
60g parmesan cheese, grated
¼ cup almonds, roughly chopped and toasted
¼ cup flat leaf parsley

Method
Heat a small frying pan over medium heat and cook bacon for a couple of minutes, until golden and crisp. Remove to drain on a paper towel.

While the bacon is chilling out, roughly shred the sprouts and transfer to a bowl. Add the remaining ingredients, bacon included, and toss well to combine.

Devour and remind yourself to always think through your haircuts.

 

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Short and curly

Guess Who's Coming to Dinner

Can she become
Can she become
My new favourite celebrity date?

New week
New month
A new celeb dropping by my home
I don’t remember (why we haven’t seen each other in so long)

Ne-ew time spent with you
I ne-ed time for me (to plan what to make)

What fo-od can I serve you
Keri, what can I cook that best reflects the close friendship you once shared with me

Fuck – I just remembered why we lost touch …

Picture source: Unknown.

 

As you can probably tell, we are very social but the fun isn’t only limited to celebrities! You can follow us on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, Tumblr and Google+.