Author: Benjamin Woodley Judd

Snoop Daggywood Dogg

Carnival Week, Party Food, Snack

Ok, so full disclosure, we pretty much hate every aspect of a carnival aside from the food. I mean between the nature and the general public, it is terrifying. We are the people that inspired Eva Gabor’s character in Green Acres, after all.

We are more urban people, which coincidentally is where we first met our dear friend Snoop Dogg (slash Lion). Snoop shared a dealer, Nancy Botwin, with us back in the early 2000s when we were staunch supporters of MILF Weed.

As we were all crazy stoned, friendship quickly blossomed between us and were initiated into his gang after scoring him a role in Starsky & Hutch with our frenemy Stiller. We then went back in time to help him co-write his hit song Gin and Juice.

As most of our catch-ups involve having the munchies (and the fact that being stoned helps going to a carnival), we opted for a pre-Ekka meal of Snoop Daggywood Doggs.

Obviously we then stayed in and got crazy stoned and spun each other in circles. Such a better choice.

 

Snoop Daggywood Dogg_1

 

Crispy, crunchy and nothing close to something you’d consider healthy, these are best dipped generously in tomato sauce. If you’re wild, mustard is a bit of fun too.

Fun fact, the Snoop Daggywood Doggs are so delicious that they were the catalyst for the notorious gang fight / murder in ‘93. Thankfully our lawyer Johnnie Cochran was free to help Snoop out!

Enjoy!

 

Snoop Daggywood Dogg_2

 

Snoop Daggywood Dogg
Serves: 3 very stoned friends.

Ingredients
⅓ cup polenta
1 cup plain flour, plus extra for dusting
1 tsp bicarb soda
1 tsp baking powder
¼ tsp cayenne pepper
pinch of salt
2 tbsp caster sugar
1 egg, lightly beaten
1 ⅓ cups buttermilk
8 frankfurts
8 skewers
vegetable oil, to fry
tommy sauce and mustard, to serve

Method
Place polenta, flour, bicarb of soda, baking powder, cayenne pepper, sugar and ½ tsp salt in a bowl and stir to combine. Stir in egg, then, gradually stir in enough buttermilk to make a smooth, thick batter.

Fill a large saucepan one-third full with oil and heat over medium heat until a chunk of bread turns golden in about 10 seconds. Place extra flour in a shallow bowl and, working with one hot dog at a time, dust in flour, shaking off the excess, then, coat liberally in batter. Holding one end of the dog with tongs, gently drop into oil and fry for 3-5 minutes or until crisp and golden. You may need to turn them halfway through. Drain on paper towel.

Thread corn dogs onto skewers and serve immediately with tommy sauce and mustard.

For classic look, dip the tip in the tommy sauce.

The tip of the meat, obviously.

Meat as in the Snoop Daggywood Dogg, obviously.

 

As you can probably tell, we are very social but the fun isn’t only limited to celebrities! You can follow us on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, Tumblr and Google+.

Once a carnie, always a carnie

Carnival Week, Guess Who's Coming to Dinner

As you’ve come to learn, Annelie and I are passionate supporters of all things cultural; I would go as far as to say that we are probably the foremost cultural experts in the country. No, the world.

You would also be aware that the best Carnival / Exhibition / Show / County Fair in the world according to its sponsors, the Ekka aka the Royal Queensland Show, is currently on and we felt it was our duty to get into the spirit and celebrate the important parts of the show.

No, not the cultural displays. Not the showbags, not the competitions, not the rides..the food.

Fun fact, but Annelie and I spent a few years manning the Tilt-A-Whirl at a carnival in beautiful Mount Rose, Minnesota until we left following an unplanned pregnancy leading to the birth of my daughter who grew up to inspire Drop Dead Gorgeous.

While we left town and eventually our calling, the carnie spirit has always remained in our blood so we decided to invite some of our closest celebrity friends over to get in on the refined culinary fun.

Welcome to Carnival Week!

Picture source: FOX.

 

As you can probably tell, we are very social but the fun isn’t only limited to celebrities! You can follow us on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, Tumblr and Google+.

Linda Bundt Cake

Cake, Dessert, Sweets

We often discuss how haters and the cynical would likely assume our friendships are all fake and for attention or to better position ourselves, but hands-on-our-hearts these people are truly our friends (we aren’t Real Housewives here guys) and none are closer to us, than dearest Linda Hunt.

So close, that Linda doesn’t trust anyone but us to cut her hair. We first took over the role of hairdresser the weekend of the ‘84 Oscars; we were on an epic coke binge the night before the show, which was the style of the time. Linds noticed she needed a trim before her moment in the spotlight, so Annelie and I stepped up to the plate and her signature hairstyle was born.

While we have been known to miss the mark on occasion, Linda has never held our relapses that result in Gale-in-Scream 3-esque fringes against us.

The last couple of days have just been a dream; touring the city, gossiping about Mel and Chris and reminiscing about all the good times we have shared. We needed something sweet to cap off her stay, so went with a delicious Linda Bundt Cake.

 

Linda Bundt Cake_1

 

I am an absolute fiend for peanut butter and chocolate, so first made the filling as a test of how compatible Linda, Annelie and I were for friendship. Between the salty goodness of the peanut butter and the creamy sweetness of the chocolate, they passed with flying colours and the cake became tradition.

Enjoy!

 

Linda Bundt Cake_2

 

Linda Bundt Cake
Serves: 8.

Ingredients
Chocolate peanut butter filling
75g plain flour
30g soft unsalted butter
1 tsp ground cinnamon
150g crunchy peanut butter
125g chocolate, melted

Cake
300g plain flour
1 tsp baking powder
1 tsp bicarbonate of soda
125g soft unsalted butter
150g caster sugar
2 eggs
250ml sour cream
icing sugar, to garnish

Method
Preheat the oven to 180°C. Generously grease a 23cm bundt tin and place to the side.

First, start on the filling by mixing together the flour and butter with a fork, until you end up with a wet sand looking mixture that clumps together. Then mix in the cinnamon, peanut butter and melted chocolate, to form a sticky, claggy paste. Set aside, it can hang with the bundt tin and bond.

Now on to the cake batter! Combine the flour, baking powder and bicarb into a bowl.

Cream the butter and sugar until light and pale in an electric mixer, then beat in 1 tablespoon of the flour mixture, then 1 egg. Then beat in another tablespoonful of flour mixture, you guessed it, followed by the remaining egg. With the mixer still running, add the rest of the flour mixture, once combined add the sour cream and mix until you have a light, thick batter. That isn’t very long, btw.

Spoon roughly half the cake batter into the bundt tin, pushing the mixture up the sides and the middle to create a coating of batter on the sides with a trough in the middle, otherwise you will have some filling leakage and that would be awkward.

With that, spoon the gooey filling into the through in the batter. Cover the filling with the remaining batter, smooth the top and place in the oven to bake for 40 minutes, checking with a cake tester after 30 minutes.

Once done aka the cake tester comes out clean where it hits the sponge, let the cake cool on a wire rack for 15 minutes in its tin before trying to turn out. After the waiting time, loosen the edges including the centre part and turn the cake out onto the rack.

When cooled completely, lightly dust with icing sugar and devour. Or just eat when slightly warm and let the still gooey centre fill you with joy.

 

As you can probably tell, we are very social but the fun isn’t only limited to celebrities! You can follow us on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, Tumblr and Google+.

NCIBless

Guess Who's Coming to Dinner

Following our work preparing Mickey Rooney for his role in Breakfast at Tiffany’s, Annelie and I became the go-to members of Hollywood’s elite for any guidance on appropriate representations of cultures and ethnicities in film, which lead to our first meeting with our dear best friend Linda Hunt.

It was 1982 and Linds was preparing to play the role of Billy Kwan in her acclaimed breakthrough performance in The Year of Living Dangerously, when our pal Mel suggested that we be brought on to coach her on representing a Chinese-Australian and help her with her dialect.

Friendship quickly blossomed during the arduous hours on set perfecting her Oscar winning performance and we eventually became best friends following an aggressive bar-fight with Sigs Weaver and her posse at the wrap party.

Linda has a late start for filming of the latest season of NCIS: LA and wanted to make the most of it and spend some time with her besties, so is dropping over for the week.

What says hey girlfriend, we miss you, love you and don’t know how you and LL survive working with Chris O’Donnell on the daily? He is just the worst.

Picture source: TVGuide.com.

 

As you can probably tell, we are very social but the fun isn’t only limited to celebrities! You can follow us on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, Tumblr and Google+.

Spicy TomaJones Sauce

Condiment, Sauce

International sex-bomb, past-TB sufferer and rugged love beast are but a few of the ways to describe our dear friend and saucy ex-lover, Tom Jones.

We first met Sir Tom when he was jonesing for us after we invented the knicker-throw at his gig at the Copacabana in 1968. Infatuated (and clearly driven wild by my man musk), we developed and deep and passionately love affair for the following decades.

It ended after I found out he was also bedding Annelie. We were both able to move past the pain and the hurt with a series of catfights, which led to us collaborating on the hit show Dynasty. It was hella cathartic.

While neither of us has felt able to rekindle that special relationship with Tom, we have grown closer in our mutual disdain for the Cardigans (they burned bridges with Tom, as well as houses).

Tom was in town for the night to work on a spin off for Theme Song Guy and start work on the sequel to What’s new pussycat? tentatively titled, What’s even newer pussycat? He was flying off to have a meat pie with Jessie J on the set of The Voice today, so we quickly whipped him up a batch of our Spicy TomaJones Sauce to take with him.

 

Spicy TomaJones Sauce_1

 

Like most things, we like to add a kick of heat to our tommy sauce. If for no other reason than Tommy gives a kick to our pants. In a good way.

Enjoy! Hopefully this can start to mend our feud with Jessie J?

 

Spicy TomaJones Sauce_2

 

Spicy TomaJones Sauce
Makes: 1-2 cups.

Ingredients
2 tbsp olive oil
2 cloves garlic, peeled and whole
1 small onion, finely diced
1 tsp chilli flakes
2 tbsp vermouth
2 x 400g cans chopped tomatoes
1 tsp sea salt flakes
1 tsp muscovado sugar
2-4 sprigs thyme

Method
Heat oil in a large saucepan/deepish frying pan over medium heat and fry off the garlic, onion and chilli flakes for a couple of minutes. Add vermouth and cook off for a minute.

Reduce heat to low and add the tinned tomatoes, salt, sugar and thyme and simmer for 10-15 minutes or until slightly reduced. (Note: trust your gut, not my timings as I’m not the best judge of time or temperature on the stovetop).

Once reduced, remove from heat and leave to cool for about half an hour. Blitz and ready to devour. If you feel the sauce is too runny, return to the heat and reduce further until at your desired consistency.

 

As you can probably tell, we are very social but the fun isn’t only limited to celebrities! You can follow us on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, Tumblr and Google+.

Christopher Porken Meatballs

Main

While it feels odd to celebrate anything relating to the Williams’ in this their time of scandal, seeing Chris and celebrating his ironic (thankfully he could confirm it) turn as Captain Hook in the extremely long-winded and completely horrible Peter Pan Live! was something we needed to do.

Yes the show was completely terrible, but we love Chris and are obviously highly supportive of his performance and his tap dancing.

We first met Chris on the set of Annie Hall where our friend Carol Kane got us a job as Diane Keaton’s vocal coach. Chris was just on the precipice of greatness with his turn in The Deer Hunter and made the time to mingle with all of his colleagues, even the entourage members / sham vocal coaches.

Thanks to the warmth and effervescent spark of Chris, we were platonically swept off our feet touring the Oscars red-carpets, hosting Hollywood soirees and sailing the SoCal coast and islands with our close friends.

As you would know, our group was struck down by tragedy when dear Natalie Wood passed away. Christopher was deeply upset and while Annelie and I tried to help him we turned to drugs while working through our own grief.

After a stint in rehab, we received a call from our friend Grace who asked for our help persuading Chris to appear in A View to a Kill. Working together on the film, we were able to work through our pain and restore our friendship, and have enjoyed a close, collaborative friendship ever since.

(Obviously the SEX book is our favourite collaboration).

Chris is still the warmest, mostly lively man we have ever met and his plot for a prequel to his Bond movie is just the sort of project we need to get back in Grace’s good, well, graces. Thankfully we threw together a quick batch of our Christopher Porken Meatballs and were able to really get the creative juices flowing.

 

Christopher Porken Meatballs_1

 

In my fat kid’s version of favourite things, meatballs are high on the list and these are the perfect example of why; spicy, fresh and versatile. You can literally chuck them with anything and you’re good to go.

Maybe don’t serve with cake? Although if it works, let us know.

Enjoy!

 

Christopher Porken Meatballs_2

 

Christopher Porken Meatballs
Serves: 4.

Ingredients
500g pork mince
2 tsp salt
3 pickled hot cherry peppers, finely chopped
2 slices toasted white bread, blitzed to a ghetto breadcrumb
1 small onion, very finely diced
1 large egg
1 tbsp apple cider vinegar
1 tbsp hot sauce
small handful flat leaf parsley, finely diced
good pinch of ground pepper

Method
Preheat the oven to 220°C.

Combine all of the ingredients in a large bowl and mix together. Form golf-ball sized meatballs, rolling between your hands until smooth and place onto a lined baking sheet.

Once all the balls are rolled, place tray in the oven and bake for 15-20 minutes or until cooked through.

Serve however you want, with pasta and a herby tomato sauce, on mini rolls as sliders, with mash and mushroom sauce or as we’ve done, with parmesan sauce and a salad.

 

As you can probably tell, we are very social but the fun isn’t only limited to celebrities! You can follow us on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, Tumblr and Google+.

Goodnight … moon

Guess Who's Coming to Dinner

To the general public, Christopher Walken is a riddle wrapped in a mystery inside an enigma but to his dear friends he is loving, warm and so darn positive and joyous.

We last saw Chris in November, when we dropped by the set to support him during his turn in Peter Pan Live! After it took Allison Williams six hours just to get the kids out of the bedroom and over to Neverland, we opted to leave before he even appeared on screen.

While he was disappointed to not have his closest friends there until the end, he knew that our make-up date would be worth it. Plus, he completely understood us wanting to avoid Brian Williams with his half-truths and made up stories.

I mean, the gall of some people!

Chris said he would be in town this week and wanted to have our make-up celebration. What says sorry you had to suffer through that show with the worst one from Girls … while also honouring our forty-year friendship?

Picture source: Unknown.

Arianncini Huffington

Party Food, Snack

It is pretty poor form for us to miss one of our closest friend’s birthdays but thankfully Arianna is so poised, dignified and understanding … particularly when it comes to rebooting CHiPs, which fun fact, is her favourite show of all time.

We have been close friends with Arianna and the wider Huffington family for the best part of the last three decades, with Annelie working as her campaign manager in the 2003 California recall election and while I went rogue, working pro-boner to bring down Arnie.

Sadly, I wasn’t his type and couldn’t get the right scandalous images and Arianna withdrew from the race after discovering my unethical plan but thankfully we were able to inspire her to launch the phenomenon that is The Huffington Post after a casual-power-lunch at Nobu.

While Arianna left lunch to get straight to work on building her empire, we lingered at the restaurant and commenced our long running feud with Yolanda Foster (we ended up giving her lyme disease) and quickly fled the country to avoid arrests.

Being a saint, Arianna  forgave us for our behaviour and has continue to support us publically as often as possible, most recently when I was campaigned for the non-existent role of King of Movember.

Wanting to impress Arianna during her quick jaunt to Brisbane (and make up for our tardiness), we opted to whip out our famed, noted and totally thriving Arianncini Huffington.

 

Arianncini Huffington_1

 

Like dear Ari, the Arianncini are textured, complex, warm with a bit of a kick and a warm gooey centre. All in all, a delight.

Enjoy and happy belated birthday dear friend!

 

Arianncini Huffington_2

 

Arianncini Huffington
Serves: 6.

Ingredients
900ml Chicken Stock
2-3 tablespoons olive oil
1 onion, finely chopped
340g marinated artichokes, drained and chopped
300g arborio rice
¼ cup dry white wine
30g unsalted butter, chopped
½ cup finely grated parmesan
squeeze of fresh lemon juice
1 tsp dried chilli flakes
100g mozzarella, cut into small cubes (you could trade out for fetta)
1 tablespoon plain flour
1 egg, lightly beaten
2 cups (200g) dried breadcrumbs

Method
Bring stock to the boil over high heat and keep at a gentle simmer.

Heat oil in a large, heavy-based pan over medium-low heat, add onion and cook for 3-4 minutes until soft. Add artichokes and rice and stir for 1-2 minutes to coat grains. Add wine and stir for 3-4 minutes until almost evaporated. Add a ladleful of stock and allow it to be absorbed. Repeat until all of the stock is used. Reduce heat and continue until rice is cooked but still firm to the bite (10-ish minutes max). Stir in butter, parmesan, lemon and chilli, and season to taste. Spread risotto in a shallow dish to cool, cover and refrigerate for at least an hour or overnight.

I find it is easy to work with if it was in the fridge for only a few hours.

Preheat oven to 200 C. Line a tray with baking paper. Place 1 tablespoon of risotto in the palm of your hand and flatten slightly. Place a piece of mozzarella in the centre, then roll up to enclose and form a smooth ball. Place on the tray. Repeat with remaining risotto, then chill balls for 10 minutes. Place flour, egg and crumbs in separate bowls. Dust risotto balls in flour, then dip in egg, roll in crumbs and return to tray.

Drizzle balls with oil and place in the oven to bake for 20 minutes, or until golden and crisp, turning halfway through baking. Yes, I am aware that is a terrible instruction, but I’m scared of frying the balls.

Best served with a spicy tomato sauce. Surely we have a recipe laying around here, somewhere?

 

As you can probably tell, we are very social but the fun isn’t only limited to celebrities! You can follow us on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, Tumblr and Google+.

Thrivin’ and a jivin’

Guess Who's Coming to Dinner

There is nothing we enjoy more than to help our dear friends celebrate their birthdays.

The delightful Ari-Huff aka Arianna Huffington media-conglomerate, actress, author and global demi-God had a birthday last week but we sadly were too busy working on rebooting CHiPs to catch-up, so delayed the party until this week.

We first met Ari in the mid-80s when we were judging a Gabor-sound-a-like-contest where she placed second behind Magda as we forgot she existed (this later inspired her fight with Brian in our script for Family Guy). After realising our mistake and apologising profusely, Ari took us under her wing and proceeded to mentor us and act as a(nother) surrogate mother.

While we briefly lost touch last year after she refused to include our chapter on jive, jivin’ and jive turkeys in her book Thrive, our friendship is as strong as it has ever been.

What says happy birthday, we love you, please employ us and we really need to talk about expanding our jive chapter into a sequel to Thrive … as that is obviously why you had it removed?

Picture source: Jordan Strauss / Invision / AP file.

Bacon and Cheese Erik Estrata

Breakfast

Erik is an absolute sweetheart and it is terrifying how much we value that in him, considering most of our closest friendships are built on a basis of lying, stealing and intimidation.

In Hollywood, it is eat or be eaten and Erik is too good for that.

We “first” met Erik after time-traveling on to the set of CHiPs after hearing about his glorious buns while working on The Nanny in the 90s. We were quickly hired as advisors on the show with our extensive knowledge of high-speed chases (from our time trying to evade arrests), after pitching a plot line involving the entire OJ arrest car-chase.

Time-travel can be really helpful when you want before their time ideas.

We haven’t seen much of Erik since he joined the police force (we didn’t want to put him in an awkward position if we fell into crime again), but got together to brainstorm the best possible way to reboot CHiPs on Netflix. Obviously it will involve me playing his son and deputy, and Annelie our sassy and aggressive Captain.

Needless to say, we had a fully realised outline by the time we finished our Bacon and Cheese Erik Estrata.

 

Bacon and Cheese Erik Estrata_1

 

The saltiness of the bacon cuts through the richness of the cheese leaving you with a strata that is light, eggy and warm. So pretty much like a hug from Erik, but with eggs.

Enjoy!

 

Bacon and Cheese Erik Estrata_2

 

Bacon and Cheese Erik Estrata
Serves: 4-6.

Ingredients
1 (heading towards stale) baguette, cut into 1-2cm slices
150g mozzarella, grated
60g parmesan, grated
100g cheddar, grated
100ml sour cream
6 free-range eggs
6 rashers bacon, diced
6 shallots, roughly sliced
handful cherry tomatoes, diced

Method
Place the cheeses, sour cream and eggs in a food processor and blend until smooth. If you don’t have a food processor, a large bowl and a stick blender will work ace. Remove the bowl from processor and add the chopped bacon, shallots and tomatoes. Lightly mix with a spoon.

Arrange the baguette slices in a layer or two in a square dish (26cm).

Pour the bacon, cheese and egg mixture over the bread in the dish, cover with cling film, and leave in the fridge to soak overnight.

The next morning, get out of bed, remove the strata from the fridge to rest while you preheat the oven to 180°C. While the oven is preheating you can say some affirmations, read the news or dance like this.

When the oven has come to temperature, place the strata in and bake for 30 minutes, or until cooked through.

Remove from the oven and devour, watching the melted cheese doesn’t burn your face.

As you can probably tell, we are very social but the fun isn’t only limited to celebrities! You can follow us on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, Tumblr and Google+.