Previously on RuPaul’s Drag Race we experienced an interesting reunion featuring walk-outs, breakdowns, Regina George-ing of Kameron and enough scolding and screaming on RuPaul to fill his Emmy sizzle-reel for years to come. Oh and something, something, something Miss Vanjie, Kalorie, Yuhua, Dusty Ray, Mayhem, Blair, Monique, The Vixen, Monét and Cracker.
We kicked things off by going all the way back to the start of Drag Race with the Season 1 queens – tragically sans Tammie Brown – appearing in HD for the first time. Well, except for BeBe and the girls that appeared in All Stars 1 … but you get what I mean. Stop calling out my season 1 filter shade.
Anyway with the queens of season 1 out of the way, Michelle introduced the queens of season 10 with Yuhua, Monique in brown cow – stunning – Monét and the damn sponge, Aquaria and Asia slaying the runway before Ru and his dancers packages graced the stage. And Mama Ru nearly damn well broke a hip breaking it down and pounding the runway like Eureka’s pussy in split-sweep mid lip-sync.
Before getting to the lip sync battle royale, Ru sat down with each member of the final four. Aquaria was first up and seemed to learn how to string together a sentence our two since filming the show, making bottoming jokes and tickling Ru’s fancy once again. Aquaria admitted that Asia would be her biggest competition going into the lip syncs – duh – delighted in the dancers and OH MY GOD IT IS MA’ FUCKIN’ OPRAH. I woke up from my Oprah induced faint to discover Aquaria was answering audience questions with quotes from the season and damn I need her to win. Before she even mentioned stanning Nina Flowers.
Next up was Asia who made it nice and awkward by saying she was marrying her boyfriend – much to his (delighted) surprise – before admitting to being catfished and not needing to tear someone down to stand tall. Given she was being far too kind and positive, Ru brought up how Asia’s deceased parents would feel about her now leading to the sweet queen breaking into tears and talking about how proud they would be and how they shaped the person he is. It was sweet and touching and thankfully Ru broke it up by offering Asia the chance to return the slap from earlier in the season before I broke down in tears.
HOLY SHIT IT IS MY DEAR FRIEND JUDI DENCH AND SHE CHOSE TO SHARE THE VIDEO WITH FINTY INSTEAD OF ME? Also – can you imagine being Michelle Visage and having Judi know who you are? And can Judi play Ru ASAP?
Before getting answers to these important questions Eureka arrived for her Q&A portion crackling with excitement, sassy jokes and a drive to win the competition to support her family. When faced with the most difficult of life’s questions – fuck, marry, kill – she opted to fuck Asia, marry Kameron and kill Aquaria. Which makes sense, TBH.
Kameron rounded out the interviews talking about her becoming the lip-sync assassin of the season and the importance of knowing your words – hey Valentina and Monique! Kameron then spoke about not getting any – literally every thirsty bitch like me will help you out – before Ru played a video message from Kameron’s grandmother who spoke about how proud of her she is and I’m crying. I mean, the sweet old thing didn’t even know he was gay before that and I love her.
Before getting to the battle royale, Sally Jesse Raphael helped Ru go over the history of drag race featuring all the iconic moments like All Stars 2 revenge of the queens, Dela’s self-elimination, Obama getting elected, Bob the Drag Queen as Cookie Lyon, Latrice and her hatred for nuts near her face, Aja deathdropping from a box and well, Shangie being Shangie. The season 1 queens then returned with this year’s batch to do a lip sync extravaganza and if Porkchop and Vanjie dueting isn’t the greatest thing I’ve seen all year, I don’t know what is. Oh wait, no, Ongina and Blair being adorable is. No Monique and Jade. No, Bebe and Cracker. NO, all the queens going at it together.
With the formalities out of the way, the top four arrived to kick of the battle dressed in such obvious, major reveal outfits I honestly can’t imagine what the season 11 finalists will wear next year? Ru then spun the wheel to see which queen would kick of the lip syncs and pick her opponent, with Kameron getting the honours. She selected Asia meaning that Aquaria would battle Eureka in the second lip sync. Ru gave Asia the chance to select a song from her box, selecting the appropriately titled Nasty by Janet Jackson.
Both queens started song, with Kameron pulling out laser sharp moves and Asia pulling out a sponge. Then tragedy struck as Asia commencing her reveals featuring life butterflies which were all dead or frozen and started writhing around the ground trying to stay alive as Kameron continued her acrobatic moves. It was hard to watch, Asia was thrown and Kameron’s focused, straight-forward lip sync carried her through to the final lip sync.
I can’t say anything more as it was hard to watch.
Asia came off stage, dumbfounded, and fell straight into my arms and I held her, in silence. Not knowing what I could say to fix things. As Asia during the reunion, she has a heart of gold and isn’t afraid to stand up for what she believes in and to me, that means she is winning. At life. And as such, I whipped out my Focasia O’Hara and we took comfort in the power of carbohydrates.
As a tween, I was passionately loyal to a focaccia. It was rich in flavour, crisp on the outside, pillowy on the inside and made me feel like cultured. Which I guess you could argue is kinda like Asia? Plus – it is delicious.
So just enjoy, yeah?
4 cups 00 flour, plus extra to dust
¼ cup parmesan cheese, grated
7g dried yeast
2 tsp kosher salt
330ml luke warm water
2 tbsp olive oil, plus extra to grease
½ cup mixed olives, pitted
½ cup cherry tomatoes, pierced
2 tbsp fresh rosemary leaves
Combine the flour, parmesan, yeast and salt in a bowl. Slowly stir through the water and oil. Once combined, transfer to a stand mixer and knead on medium for 10 minutes, or until it is smooth and elastic. Transfer to an oil bowl, cover with cling and leave to prove for an hour or so, or until doubled in size.
Punch the dough back and transfer to a lined baking sheet, pushing and pulling into a large, 1-2cm rectangle. Press your fingers in like you’re playing a piano to form dimples, and fill said holes with tomatoes, olives and rosemary. Leave to prove again for a further half hour.
Preheat the oven to 180°C.
Once done proving, transfer to the oven and bake for 20-30 minutes, or until golden and cooked through. Allow to cool slightly before devouring, still warm.