Seth Rogen Josh

Main, Poultry

Seriously, I don’t think I’ve laughed this much in years. Like full on, deep, hearty Rogen-esque chuckles.

I’ve known my dear friend Seth since we were wee babes, well since just before we became men. You see Seth, Evan Goldberg and I attended the same bar mitzvah classes, became friends and commenced writing Superbad. It all went south, however, when they found out I wasn’t Jewish and was instead trying to find myself a boyfriend and join the moile high club.

Seth, loving his role as a (future) bear icon, didn’t mind however Evs was not thrilled and had my name struck from the Superbad script and hasn’t spoken to me since. Which, let’s be honest is a total dick move, since it puts our best friend Seth in a hella awkward place.

Given that Seth is so busy, I haven’t seen him since the premiere of Neighbours … where I caused a scene when Zac suggested we take a break. Which reminds me, that was another reason I haven’t seen Seth in years.

Thankfully, he is hella forgiving and understands that the thirst is real and Zefron floods my basement and that when Zef takes sex off the table, I go insane. After a quick apology, catch-up and subtle prying into whether he think Zef and I will get back together – FYI, he thinks there is hope for us – we sat down to a big bowl of his favourite Seth Rogen Josh.

 

 

Like Seth – and Zef, for that matter – this curry is hot, spicy and makes you feel unending joy when it is inside you, filling you up with its goodness. I got well distracted, didn’t I?

Oy – it is delicious, like Seth. Enjoy!

 

 

Seth Rogen Josh
Serves: 4.

Ingredients
thumb sized piece of fresh ginger, finely grated
4 garlic cloves, peeled and finely chopped
vegetable oil
500g chicken breast or lamb shoulder, diced
5 whole cardamom pods
1 bay leaf
3 whole cloves
5 whole peppercorns
1 cinnamon sticks
2 onions, peeled and finely chopped
½ tsp ground coriander
1 tsp cumin seeds
2 tsp paprika
½ tsp cayenne pepper
½ tsp salt
¼ cup plain yogurt
¼ tsp garam masala
fresh ground pepper
fresh coriander, to garnish

Method
Put the ginger, garlic and ¼ cup water into food processor and blitz into a smooth paste.

Heat a lug of oil in a large pot over medium heat and lightly brown the meat. Remove from the pan and set aside.

Place the cardamom, bay leaves, cloves, peppercorns and cinnamon in the meaty oil and fry, stirring, until the cloves swell and your kitchen is fragrant. Add the onions, reduce heat to low and sweat for five minutes. Add the ginger/garlic paste and fry for a minute before adding the remaining spices and cooking for a further minute.

Return the meat – and all their juices – to the pan with the yoghurt and stir until combined and cook for a couple of minutes. Add a cup of water, bring to the boil and deglaze the pan. Reduce heat to low, cover and simmer for an hour, stirring occasionally.

At the end of the hour, remove the lid and turn the heat to medium to reduce the liquid to desired consistency.

Serve with rice, garnished with some fresh coriander and your favourite sides. I recommend raita, naan and pappadums … but it is up to you. I guess.

 

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Tinaan Wesson

Bread, Side, Snack, Survivor: Game Changers – Mamanuca Islands, Vegetarian

I know what you’re thinking – please, stop with the fucking posts and give the internet a break, we are sick of you!

Firstly, cool, point taken. But sorry, no can do. And secondly, fuck you, you come here by choice, why be so nasty to me? Thirdly, thanking for boosting my traffic though.

Anyway, let’s stop the drama because something very exciting is almost upon us – Queen Sandra Diaz-Twine is but four weeks away from kicking off her run for a third Survivor crown. Which she will win.

To get in the spirit this season, I thought I would round up four of my favourite winners and countdown to this momentous occasion. And obviously I am starting things with my second favourite winner behind Queen SDT, Tina Wesson.

I mean, she is the closest (other than my girl Parv) to snatching a second crown, so what’s not to love?

I first met Teens while Survivor: The Australian Outback was in production. I was a newbie, 13 year old fan and was desperate to connect with Probst, so trekked Queensland until I stumbled into the Kucha camp on Day 17.

That stumble changed the course of the game as I accidently pushed Scupin into the fire – in addition, I met my frenemy Lis Filarski, made out with Varner and wagged my finger in Alicia’s face, so win – and allowed Ogakor to tie things up, leading to Tina dominating and winner the game.

While she is one of the best low-key masterminds, Tina was always grateful for my accidental assistance and we have been close ever since.

As a Survivor tragic, Teens was thrilled to get my call and to try and get some information out of me pre-season. Particularly since I was promising a table full of freshly made Tinaan Wesson.

27 days until the premiere – who will join me next week? *Spoiler alert* he is banging.

 

tinaan-wesson-1

 

Now I could make an argument for any form of bread being the best, but a filled naan would have to be up the top of the list. Scorched, warm, pillowy dough enclosing a cheesy, spiced spinach mixture. Need I say more?

Enjoy!

 

tinaan-wesson-2

 

Tinaan Wesson
Makes: 8.

Ingredients
7g dry yeast
1 tbsp caster sugar
2 cup flour, plus more for rolling
1 tbsp olive oil
salt and pepper
1 bunch of baby spinach, washed and chopped
3 cloves of garlic, crushed
1 tsp chilli flakes
½ cup cheddar cheese, grated

Method
To make the dough, combine ½ cup of warm water in jug with the sugar and yeast. Give a quick stir and leave to rest for about 10 minutes, or until foamy and smelling like a brewery.

Place the flour in a large bowl of a stand mixer, pour in the yeasty water, oil and a pinch of salt and knead with a dough hook for five minutes, or until combined to make a smooth, elastic dough.

Transfer to a large, oiled bowl and leave to prove for an hour, or until doubled in size.

While the dough is proving itself like Tina in the outback, heat a lug of oil in a medium frying pan and cook the garlic for a minute. Reduce heat to low and add the spinach, chilli and a good whack of pepper. Cook until all moisture is removed. Take it off the heat and allow to cool for ten minutes or so, before adding in the cheese.

Once the dough and filling are ready, transfer the dough to a bench, punch back and split into 6-8 chunks – depending on how big you’d like your naans.

One at a time, roll out the ball of dough place the filling in the centre and seal it into a ball. Dust the ball with flour, press to flatten and roll into an oval shape. Continue until all the dough and mix are done.

Once ready, heat a small skillet over medium-low heat, sprinkle some water on the naan and place on the pan. Cook for a three minutes or, flip and cook for a further couple of minutes. You want it to be golden and crisp but still soft on the edges … and most importantly the cheese melted.

Devour.

 

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