Hot Dognise Richards

Bread, Fame Hungry's American Teen Princess Pageant, Main, Party Food, Side, Snack

Now that we’re on the slippery slope to Fourth of July, it means that our Drop Dead Gorgeous celebrations are about to reach a crescendo which just breaks my heart. I mean, DDG deserves our constant adoration, but sadly the ladies have careers that they need to attend to and I can’t just hang with them 24/7. Though I did float that idea with my girl Denise Richards.

While she wasn’t keen on putting her career on hold her joyous spirit and quick wit distracted from the pain I was feeling. We haven’t always seen eye to eye – see her marriage to Charlie Sheen for instance – but we’ve always been the best of friends.

I first met Denise when she guested on an episode of Beverly Hills, 90210, we quickly bonded and – obvi – I vowed to make her a big, big star. While it took me a few years to pinpoint the direction her career should head, I eventually nailed it with the back-to-back-to-back-to-back hits of Starship Troopers, Wild Things, DDG and a star making, believable turn as nuclear physicist Dr. Christmas Jones opposite Judi Dench in The World is Not Enough. Which I think you would agree, is a great place to start.

I haven’t seen much of Denny lately so I treasured the time we had together, gossiping about our mutual friend Lisa Rinna, planning a Christmas Jones spin-off and discussing options for an anti-swan-riding PSA. As you can see, we had big stuff going on so we needed something quick, easy and hearty … like my Hot Dognise Richards.

 

 

They are not a dignified meal, more are they healthy … or difficult, but you can’t honour Americana without an old fashioned hot dog. Plus, you know I can’t go past shoving a warm sausage, dripping in sauce, into some pillowy buns.

Enjoy!

 

 

Hot Dognise Richards
Serves: 4.

Ingredients
8 Kirsten Bunst, hot dog shaped obvi
8 skinless frankfurts
tomato ketchup
BBQ sauce
American mustard
grated cheese

Method
Bring a pot of water to the boil over high heat. Once furiously boiling, add the frankfurts and cook until they float to the surface.

Slice the buns, douse in your favourite condiments, add some cheese, top with a sausage and wrap your lips around it … to devour, sickos.

 

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Kevin Bacon & Egg Pie

Main

Kevin is one of the sweetest celebrity friends we have. Sweetest and sexiest, obviously.

Following our one-two punch of Stockholm syndrome-ing and Fatal Attraction-ing our way into his heart, he gave us a start running coffee on Apollo 13 where we did such a good job (minus “accidentally” spiking Tom Hanks coffee with laxatives) that I was given the role as Jim Lovell’s wife’s body-double in the pivotal shower/ring scene and Annelie was hired to advise on the appropriate representation of the peanuts.

Obviously, we killed it and it brought us closer to Kevs and were invited to join his entourage/heavies during the filming of Picture Perfect (he was feuding with Jen An at the time…the only time we aren’t on Team Jen) before we graduated to being his fluffer on the set of Wild Things (we are really good with various…jobs).

We haven’t seen Kevin in a while, with him busy on the set of The Following, so to celebrate our warm and sexy friendship and show our gratitude he made the trip to see us, we served him up a large, hot, delicious slice of our famous Kevin Bacon & Egg Pie. This time, unusually, on plates rather than…never mind.

 

Kevin Bacon & Egg Pie_1

 

The pie is the perfect meal for when you are short on time and want something easy and comforting. Plus spinach makes it seem healthy (and I just love spinach) and bacon is the best.

The food and the man. Enjoy!

 

Kevin Bacon & Egg Pie_2

 

Kevin Bacon & Egg Pie
Serves: 6.

Ingredients
1 tablespoon olive oil
2 medium brown onions, chopped
350g rindless shortcut bacon rashers, diced
1 3/4 sheets frozen reduced-fat shortcrust pastry, partially thawed
1 1/3 cups grated reduced-fat tasty cheddar
8 eggs
1/2 cup pure cream
250g frozen spinach, defrosted and drained

Method
Heat oil in a large frying pan over medium-high heat. Add onion. Cook, stirring, for 5 minutes or until softened. Add bacon. Cook, stirring, for 5 minutes or until browned. Remove from heat and stir through drained spinach. Cool.

Preheat oven to 180°C. Place a baking tray in oven. Grease a 6cm-deep, 20cm round springform pan. Using base of pan as a guide, cut 1 circle from 1 pastry sheet. Line base of prepared pan with pastry round. Cut remaining pastry sheet into 3 equal strips. Line side of pan with pastry, trimming to fit and pressing edges together (you will have some leftover pastry).

Spoon half the bacon and spinach mixture into pan. Sprinkle with 1 cup cheese. Whisk 4 eggs and cream together in a jug. Add to pan. Sprinkle with remaining bacon and spinach mixture. Make 4 holes into mixture in pan. Crack 1 egg into each hole. Sprinkle with remaining cheese. Season with pepper. Fold pastry over at top edge.

Place in hot oven and bake for 45 to 50 minutes or until pie is firm to touch. Stand in pan for 10 minutes. Serve on whatever dish you desire.