Previously on All Stars the eliminated queens gooped everyone by returning to the Werk Room for another shot at the crown. Valentina too technically had another shot at the crown since Ru suspended All Stars rules before either Manila or Monet had the chance to take her out. It all started to make sense though – maybe – as Manila and Monet received immunity for the week while last week’s bottom four were forced to lip sync to the death with the four eliminated queens, with the winner of each staying slash returning to the competition and the loser sashaying away. Sadly try as they might, Jasmine, Farrah and a killer Gia lost their lip syncs, while Monique was gagged and gooped by Latrice who returned to the competition. Thankfully without eliminating Monique after Ru declared the lip sync a tie.
Back in the Werk Room Latrice and Monique celebrated their double win, despite the former disappointed she didn’t get revenge to go with her redemption. Everyone else was congratulating the girls on a job well down, while Monique was sad to have to put up with Latrice’s joy inspired ego speech. Thankfully Valentina cut her off to chastise Monet and Manila once again for destroying her fantasy by trying to ruin her fantasy. Seemingly unaware that there are still seven queens left in the competition and she needs to step up reality if she wants to make it to the end.
The queens returned the next day with Manila still giddy to have her girl back, while Latrice was nervous to become just another returning queen statistic by heading home this episode. Ru arrived to explain that this week the queens would be heading into the club world purse first by designing their own club night in teams, complete with entertainment and a signature cocktail. Feeling super generous, Ru tasked Latrice with pairing up the queens before joining the duo of her choice – Monet and Monique joined up, Trinity and Manila were a pair leaving Valentina and Naomi together. Obviously Latrice joined Trinity and Manila.
Naomi and Valentina got to work excited to combine their fun, fashion, fun, glam and youngness, though they seemed to struggle to figure out a theme with Valentina kinda echoing everything Naomi said … but they are weird and cute and I love it. Despite Naomi’s fears. Monique and Monet quickly settled on the Black Hole theme, where anything goes in a sci-fi fantasy complete with alien babies and slime. Rounding out the planning, Trinity noticed she and Manila both had yellow and black outfits, so suggested a bee theme. Which the three jumped on, motivated by the confidence of Manila thanks to her passion for graphic design.
The queens then moved to the warehouse where they would build said clubs, with Monique shocked that they would be required to paint themselves. Valentina was ready to paint and play in her panties, while Latrice struggled to get into her painting overalls and Monet and Monique tut-tutted as they focused on the task at hand. Though Monique isn’t painting to the word of the lord and Manila turned up with full blown schematics, so who is really going to slay? Particularly since Manila is working hard to get Latrice a win. Oh and Naomi is terrified about their showing, given Valentina has no interest in preparing anything and can only focus on the painting. And touring the other queens’ clubs.
Elimination day rolled around and the queens got down to preparing for their big openings, with Valentina anxious though trying to stay focused, Naomi shading her attention span and Monet thrilled about being in the presence of Susanne Bartsch. Valentina admitted that Naomi carried her during the competition, while Latrice was feeling super confident and locked forward to showing off her runway before talk turned to everyone being in the bottom. With everyone realising that Manila has never been up for elimination … and Trinity definitely thinks Valentina should go home.
Michelle and Carson were joined by my girl Rita Ora and Susanne Bartsch to tour the clubs, with Monique and Monet’s slaying with a killer script, sci-fi realness and the new pit crew member strutting the runway. We checked in on Club 96 – Club 96 – where Naomi was prepared though a little flat and Valentina was quirky and TBH it worked. Club 96. As did the repetition of Club 96. Club 96. Make no mistake, these two are in the bottom barring a major bee-mergency. Club 96. Not even the pit crew’s bulges could save it. Club 96. From the poster – strip spelling bee, ya’ll – it was obvious that the top would feature a combination of Trinity, Latrice and Manila. Latrice charmed the crowds, the pit crew had golden bulges, Trinity brought a tonne of puns and Manila played support to pump up her friends.
On the plastique fantastique runway Latrice stunned – literally, since it wasn’t bedazzled – in a bright gown that put the ball in ball gown. Latrice served fruit basket realness, Trinity looked like the hottest piece of gum, Naomi served disc realness, Valentina brought up barbie, Monet steamed up in a clear gladiator number and Monique monkeyed around in a Josephine Baker inspired banana gown. The judges loved everything Latrice did this week, particularly getting out of her comfort zone on the runway. Manila too received universal praise, however Michelle felt she went a bit OTT in the hosting. The judges loved Trinity’s looked and felt her performance was polished from start to finish. Everyone loved Naomi’s general look and the delivery of Club 96, verbally, though felt the hosting fell flat. Valentina’s outfit was read for filth by Michelle – maybe. She tried at least – while the club was praised for looking nice, though Valentina was read for not being prepared. Monet and Monique’s club received universal praise, with Monet congratulated for upping the runway game and Monique’s look read for falling flat on the runway but praised for the club. As such, Latrice and Trinity landed in the top two while Valentina and Naomi were up for elimination.
Back in the Werk Room Trinity and Latrice thanked Manila for elevating their performance and snatching them a win, with Trinity even giving her half of her prize. Latrice was really proud to finally get a win, while Valentina kinda felt like she was ready to go, not wanting to turn into Roxxxy, Chi Chi or Kennedy. Trinity and Naomi caught up, with Naomi nervous that Trinity and Valentina’s friendship will come in to play over the performance. Trinity felt that Naomi has just been there during the competition, while Naomi pushed the fact that she did most of the work. Meanwhile over with Latrice and Valentina, Valentina tried to stay strong though did tell Latrice to trust her gut. Which would play into my theory she wants to be euthanised. Naomi made sure that Latrice knew how much she desperately wants to stay, while Latrice was concerned that safe isn’t enough and she has a stronger bond with Valentina which made Naomi really nervous. Trinity explained that while she loves Valentina, she wants to be fair when making the decision and it sounds like Naomi put in more work in the challenge. Valentina then encouraged her to do the right thing … and Valentina is not in her fantasy anymore, right?
Latrice came ready to slay the lipsync while Trinity came ready to pull the men at the retirement centre. She then ripped off her robe and swung those old titties around like crazy, though it didn’t seem to make much sense. While Latrice hit every lyric, bounced Trinity out of the way and rolled across the runway. As such Latrice snatched victory and with a heavy heart, sent the delightfully wacky Valentina from the competition. Everyone’s favourite little coconut was obviously feeling her telenovela oats as she arrived backstage and fainted into my arms from the shock of being taken out of the competition despite creating the ultimate club, Club 96. Club 96. While I agreed she did create a wonderful space – Club 96 – it was probably her time, considering how strong everyone is … and she has a role in Rent Live to work on. With that, she perked up, we laughed and then smashed a BLTina or two.
While my relationship with the classic BLT started off soft in the early 00s – tomato and lettuce, vom! – I have well and truly warmed to this delightful little sandy-j. Sweet mayo, tangy mustard and salty bacon are the perfect accompaniment for the aforementioned, formerly unloved fruit and veg. Plus – who doesn’t love bread?
6 rashers streaky bacon
4 slices crusty bread
2 tbsp cup Shayonnaise Swain
1 tbsp dijon mustard
1 tomato, sliced
salt and pepper, to taste
½-1 cup butter lettuce leaves
fries, to serve
Heat a skillet over medium heat and once nice and hot, add the bacon. Cook until nice and crispy before transferring to kitchen paper to drain.
To assemble, toast the bread and smear two slices with mayo and the other two with mustard. Top the mustard side with tomato and a whack of salt and pepper, followed by 3 rashers of bacon and a few lettuce leaves.
Close the sandy, serve with fries and devour.
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