Previously on RuPaul’s Drag Race: UK vs the World nine queens came together from across the road, uniting the best and brightest that Canada, Thailand, Holland and the US have to offer against a trio of UK icons. As quickly as they came together on the stage, poor Lemon was sent packing, quickly followed by the iconic Cheryl Hole. After that, things started to truly get wild as the winner of the first two challenges Jimbo was eliminated by Pangina. In turn, after taking out Snatch Game, Blu took a leaf out of her book and eliminated Pangina for being the biggest threat.
When the US girls took out the final challenge, they both decided to keep things fair(ish) as they both picked Janey to go home. Juju because she felt Janey did the worst in the challenge, while Mo did it to protect Blu. Though since it was Juju who won the lip sync, I will focus on that.
Team US and Team UK took the stage one final time for the lip sync smack down for the crown, with Mo eliminating Baga in the first round before Blu bested Juju and booked her place in the final lip sync. Before charming her way through the final performance with all the camp that British drag has to offer, eliminating Mo and claiming the title of Queen of the World.
While Blue entered the competition feeling like a filler queen, she well and truly stamped her place in the competition, cementing her legacy and booking her place in the Winner’s Circle. All before she stopped looking like she was in school.
Backstage I pulled her in for a massive hug and congratulated her on jagging the win and while her prize may not exactly be the best, she was thrilled to be able to swap smutty jokes with me as the winner. And down round after round of Blu Skydrangeas.
It always feels a little redundant when it comes to talking up alcohol (maybe that should tell me something), but this one is a real winner. Fresh and fruity, it is the perfect way to celebrate victory or dream of a bright, sunny day.
Enjoy!
Blu Skydrangea Serves: 1.
Ingredients ice 30ml gin 30ml lime juice 30ml blue curaçao 15ml cherry liqueur lemonade, to top
Method Pop the ice, gin, lime juice, blue curaçao and cherry liqueur in a cocktail shaker and shake until well combined.
Pour into a highball glass and top up with some lemonade. Down and repeat.
Previously on Australian Survivor Nina struggled with her guilt after joining her alliance to get rid of her mother, though was emotionally getting ready to take absolute control of the game. The Blood tribe dominated the next immunity challenge – why couldn’t this challenge have been an episode earlier?! – sending the new Water tribe to tribal council. And Sophie into paranoia mode as she spent the afternoon stressing out about Sam voting her out again and hunting for an idol. This sadly led to her sister KJ breaking down given she was quickly becoming more and more at risk of becoming collateral damage amongst her chaos. After Sam and Sophie got into a(nother) massive fight at tribal, we learnt Sophie didn’t actually find an idol and as such she was voted out for good. This time by her own sister.
Back at camp KJ was sad to have voted out her little sister, though the tribe kindly rallied around her to make sure she was ok before she quietly cried by the fire, vowing to make her sister proud. And well, we need to protect KJ at all costs because she is one of the sweetest, kindest people to grace the planet.
The next day things were far more chill as the tribe snuggled together and bonded, with KJ feeling relaxed now that she only has to worry about herself. Sam meanwhile was worried about what sort of a relationship she could have with KJ moving forward before she caught up with Chrissy, who suggested Michelle and KJ should be the next two to go. So maybe she won’t have to worry if Chrissy gets her way. Either way Sam didn’t appear to be sold on the idea before she moved on to Khanh in the water, who admitted he was kind of shocked he wasn’t blindsided at the last tribal council given it would have been the perfect cover for them to use. Sam opened up to us about loving Khanh and enjoying working with him, though admitted she wasn’t sure if he and his idol would end up being an asset or a curse for her game.
Meanwhile over at Blood, Nina and Jordan were swapping war stories while poor Amy was just feeling left right out, unsure how to read any of the relationships in the new tribe and missing the good old days. Like when Sandra was here, I assume. She had a quick chat with Mark about relationships on Blood, with Amy disappointed that her relationship with Jordan had changed now that his cousin was around. Speaking of Josh, we finally heard from him and learnt he was loving being reunited with his cousin, despite how much of a target it puts on their backs. We also finally got his backstory and learnt about him being a pilot, which would have been useful information before Jonathan ran his mouth about his profession every damn challenge.
Josh realised that he couldn’t rely solely on his cousin however, so approached Nina about firmly up their alliance. Which she was happy with. For now.
The tribes met up with Jonathan for the latest reward challenge where they would face off, two by two, on a pontoon where one person from each tribe would have to try and pull a pole through a knot to knock their rival off the edge. With the first tribe to three getting a feast of fish and chips, which had Chrissy speechless, which is a feat in itself. Mark and Croc were first to battle trying to knock off Jordie and Jesse, and since Jordie got Sandra out, I look forward to him going into the drink. Which tragically meant Mark saved him and took out the first round for Blood. Sam and Chrissy were up next against Shay and Mel, with Nina and Mark assuring Mel to just hold firm until Chrissy tires. Which didn’t happen as her fire for food was enough to send Shay into the water and tie things up.
KJ and Ben were up next against Amy and Josh with the newly introduced pilot besting Ben out of nowhere, despite the latter’s prowess at furiously pulling on his pole. From Jonathan’s mouth to my ears! Josh and Jordan teamed up against Khanh and Croc in the next round with Jordan narrowly taking out victory for Blood after a very hard fought battle before poor Croc lost his grip. Much to his absolute dismay.
Back at camp the Blood tribe were delighted to find their bountiful feast of fish and chips, despite the fact I hate the idea of salad also being brought into the equation. We then learnt that Shay had been vegan for over six years but recently started eating fish again and as such, she was pumped to eat anything and everything in sight. Cutlery be damned. Jordie meanwhile was smashing lemons, while Josh was busy stressing about Mel’s bond with Mark given she isn’t as strong as other people. And he just doesn’t really click with her. Oh and then we got a bunch of flight puns and while I normally live for a pun, I wasn’t feeling it because I live in hope we’ll one day meet the twins.
We then ventured back to the Water tribe with Chrissy frustrated to still have an empty, ever shrinking belly. She opened up to Croc about how exhausted she is and how much she is missing her babies and ugh, watching her hold back tears was difficult. Khanh noticed how everyone was feeling down, sharing with us that he didn’t really care about missing out on the food given all he cares about is immunity. Oh and when you start losing rewards, you see who is really struggling with their emotions and as such, it paints a target on other people’s backs. Chrissy meanwhile tried to get Ben to believe in himself, rather than treating himself so harshly whenever he loses. While Khanh and Sam floated the idea of going after him at the earliest convenience because of his post-loss mood.
And please Khanh, don’t make me lose one of my speedo zaddies so soon!
The tribes reunited with Jonathan in the middle of the bush for the next immunity challenge where the tribes would have to walk through a floating obstacle one at a time carrying a spool before stacking them on the end of the apparatus. With the first tribe to balance all of their spools taking out victory. Amy quickly whipped through the course for the Blood tribe while Michelle took the slow and steady approach for Water. Sam quickly tried to close the gap with Shay and from there, everything appeared to be pretty even until Jordie placed his spool off centre, leading to Jordan almost knocking off their stack and having to wait for things to stabilise before he continued. And then it ended up dropping completely as soon as he re-started, giving Water a huge advantage, allowing them to take things slow as Blood started over once again. Which proved too much to come back from as Ben placed the final Water spool and took out immunity for his tribe.
And more importantly, earned his redemption from the reward loss.
Back at camp the tribe were gutted to have lost the challenge, none more so than Jordan even though it was all actually Jordie’s fault. But whatever. Thankfully, he was feeling a-ok despite the fact the OG Blood tribe were outnumbered, given his cousin is very well connected. Josh crossed over to talk to Dave and Jordan to float the idea of getting rid of Mel, given she is very non-committal whenever he tries to talk to her about alliance. Since they had no other real options, they readily agreed and the idea quickly whipped all through camp as everyone got on board.
When Jordan went to loop in his dear friend Amy, she decided enough was enough and as such, she wanted to split up the last remaining duo in the tribe as they had gotten so cocky. Amy went to Dave and Mel, quickly getting them on board with her plan to take out Jordan before approaching Mark to gauge his interest. Who obviously said he was keen but reminded her they still needed another person to pull it off and as such, she approached Shay. Who tragically went straight back to Josh and filled him in on her plan to split up the cousins.
Josh immediately pulled all the boys aside to catch up with Jordan – who was bathing in his speedos like a king – and quickly flipped the vote on Amy instead of Mel. Feeling confident, the cousins pulled in anyone and everyone in the tribe, locking in the OG Water tribe to vote for Amy while the OG Blood would vote for Mel. However thankfully when Nina found out, she wasn’t really into the idea of getting rid of Amy and as such, she was thrilled when Amy approached her to get rid of Jordan. Particularly since if she wants to be Josh’s number one, she needs to get rid of his cousin to lock in his loyalty to her.
At tribal council Jordan freely admitted that his stumble in the challenge could have painted a target on his back, with Josh doubling down on the strategy of keeping the best challenge performers in the competition despite his cousin allegedly causing their loss. Dave jumped in and defended Amy, pointing out she was far and away the best in this challenge, which Josh really didn’t seem interested in listening to. Amy opened up about her difficult position post-swap, though was hopeful she was able to make friends before talk turned to making moves and taking risks, because they all need a resume to take out the win.
Jonathan reminded them all of Sandra’s advice to focus on making decisions that are best for their individual games which Nina agreed was the greatest advice, given a compelling argument can quickly cloud your judgement and distract from what you need to do. Mel meanwhile focused on the fact the game will soon change again when the tribes merge and as such, they need to start making decisions based on what will help them later. Nina agreed that it is a massive complication and there are so many moving parts, leading to Josh and Jordan both talking about sticking to their word. Though Nina assured us that she knows who she wants to wake up with the next morning and that decision is what is best for her game.
With that the tribe voted and while I was hopeful Amy’s plan against my speedo king would come together, she was tragically booted from the game ending our week of hard losses. Like her brother, Amy is an absolutely delightful icon and obviously, we are the dearest of friends. While I was kicked off Masterchef during Khanh’s season and wiped for the record, we became super close before I met Amy and became even closer with her. Maybe because my parents were going to call me Amy if I were a girl.
As such, it was so wonderful to be there for my girl when she arrived in Loser Lodge. While she was disappointed to go so soon, I reminded her that in many ways, being swap-screwed is the best way to go, given it is one of those instances where there is really nothing you could do. And you know, blame your demise on that. With that, we had many a laugh before toasting her success with a big ol’ Amy Melong Ball.
While this may not be my favourite cocktail, it is so camp and kitsch that I will never turn it down. I mean, it is called a melon ball and the garnish IS A MELON BALL.
Enjoy!
Amy Melong Ball Serves: 1.
Ingredients ice 60ml Midori 30ml vodka orange juice melon balls, to garnish
Method Fill a glass with ice and pour in the midori and vodka before topping with orange juice (which I may have forgotten about and just doubled the recipe).
As my love Jonathan reminded us, previously on Australian Survivor we staged a brutal, epic battle between brians and brawn to see who would reign supreme. Which, spoiler alert, was a brain who was also super strong which kinda means you need a little bit of yin and yang to win, no? On and said all rounder, was the iconic Hayley who managed to navigate around George’s wild game, being booted and coming back from redemption and Cara’s passion for cooking plans.
But I’ve digressed. Like early season Probst transferring the final tribal council votes, Jonathan then literally jumped in a leftover Mad Max car from the BvB opening and drove himself through the outback from the desert of Cloncurry into the stunning oasis that is the land of the Gudjala People near the township of Charters Towers. Eventually he pulled up, issued his 47 days line and well, I have goosebumps!
First we met brothers Jordie and Jessie who look equal parts goofy and athletic, though they assured us that they were competitive best mates. Jessie is the one they’d get to lead them into a battle, while Jordie would be best for leading to the pub. And just like that, I live for Jordie. Sisters KJ and Sophie were up next with Sophie sharing how direct she is, while KJ is sneaky. And given Sophie is proudly controversial and outspoken, I have a feeling KJ will be making it further.
Ex-Rooster Michael Crocker – aka Croc – and his sister-in-law were ready to fight, well he was. She is proudly uncoordinated, thinks that tribal council is called tribunal and most importantly, is giving off big Cara energy and well, I love her already. Chrissy is life, long live Chrissy. King Khanh from Masterchef was joined in the game by his equally iconic sister Amy and well, I am ready for Khanh to come in and play as equally cutthroat as Sandra.
Speaking of former players, Andy is back looking for redemption alongside his sister Kate and ugh, I hate how triggered I am by Andy because I want to like him, however I know we’d have the same trajectory if I played the game and that makes me sad. Thankfully his sister Kate seems super sweet and ready to help him navigate the social aspect better than his first season. They were joined by Mark and Sam who met on season 2, fell in love and are now married with a super cute son. And damn, I hope we get the chaotic, controlling Sam from her first season because she was FUN.
Then, the moment we’ve all been waiting for – SANDRA AND NINA, officially, confirmed, here. Australia! They quickly jumped in a chopper and as the 22 other castaways – or peasants – climbed rocky terrain to meet Jonathan by a watering hole before it landed unveiling the Queen to her subjects. Or, well, fellow competitors. While Chrissy incorrectly identified Sandra as Oprah at first, the cast were gagged to see the Queen down under alongside her daughter. We then got a supercut of Sandra’s greatest hits including dumping the fish, burning a hat and eating sugar and gah, I just love her so much. And Nina seems so bubbly and fun and ugh, I. Am. Ready.
I mean, Sandra is ready to beat her own daughter down.
After everyone calmed down, Jonathan quickly painted a target on Sandra’s back, pointing out she is the queen. Thankfully, Nina quoted Sandra’s I don’t know about that when Sandra said she was confident in her chances, so maybe she will have trouble getting her third win. Particularly since Croc admitted to being a bit nervous to face off against former players, though was ready to fight them which you know means, get rid of them ASAP.
Surprising everyone on the shore but not a soul watching, Jonathan split everyone up from their loved ones putting one on each of the tribes. Before they were immediately tasked with battling it out in the first reward challenge of the season for a welcome fire pit. Which is a pretty epic way to start the game, TBH. One by one, each pair would face off racing down a slide into the water to grab a ring, which they need to drag over to a long, hard pole. First up were Jesse and Jordie with Jesse whipping down the slide before his big brother dragged him all the way to his pole, scoring the first point for the Water tribe. Because yes, we’ve gone from Brains, Brawn and Fire to Blood and Water.
KJ and Sophie were up next with the latter ready to destroy her sister, which she did, after a brutal fight, tying things up between the tribes. Andy kindly helped his sister up the stairs before scoring the second point for his tribe. What looked to be the most mis-matched pairing in Croc and Chrissy was actually a decent fight as Chrissy threw her body around and nearly dragged her brother-in-law over to her pole before he got a second wind and tied things up between the tribes. Then Sandra faced off against Nina and well, these two are just the best. I mean, neither were tall enough to grab the ring off the hook at first and then fought tooth and nail until Nina pulled the ring out of her mum’s hands and snatched victory for the Water tribe.
We followed the Water tribe back to camp where Chrissy realised that she is a little over her head given she hates the outdoors and is already losing her fake tan. Andy meanwhile rallied the group and congratulated them on their killer win. Which Chrissy struggled to celebrate given she is without her support system in Croc. Thankfully she is so charming and hilarious, I see her doing well after that initial shock wears off. The tribe sat in the water and did a quick getting to know you session, with Andy this time opting to go the honest route. Though given the editors gave him the joker music, I’m scared for him. As Mark opened up about his life, Jordie outed his brother Jesse as a huge fan of Mark and well, his edit is already night and day with Andy in how likeable and magnetic he is coming across. While Mark is a literal soldier, Andy took the lead on building their shelter which filled Mark with absolute joy as the target was firmly being painted on Andy, rather than him.
Meanwhile over at the Blood tribe, Jesse was mostly disappointed about losing to his brother rather than losing the challenge. More importantly, he is a superfan that is in awe of Sandra and I love him for it. Jesse and Jordie forever! After everyone else introduced themselves, the tribe got to work building the shelter as Sandra worried about a target being painted on her back. Jesse admitted that it would take him a while to get comfortable in front of her given he is such a fan, with Sandra calmly reminding him that she is just a person that is looking to fit in and ugh, I love her.
Sandra admitted that she knows the odds are against her as the queen, particularly given how physical Australian Survivor is, but as always, she will bide her time until she can take control and win.
The next day the tribe were trying to get comfortable, while Sophie quickly realised she was in the middle of the bush. Which is what happens when an animal licks you on the face while you sleep, to be honest. We then learnt a little more about her, a former WAG and super successful business woman and most importantly, she is bi so I will stan her until my dying breath.
Over at the Water tribe, most of them settled down for breakfast as Queen Shayelle – aka Slayelle – wandered around camp, collecting firewood and being an absolute provider. Though she did open up about feeling overwhelmed being apart from her partner Ben and ugh, I love her too. Which has nothing to do with the fact that she is so strong she could murder me with her bare hands. Honest. She started to bond with Briana who is kind and bubbly, though Shay quickly pegged her as a threat given her likability will take her far and as such, she will need to be cut eventually.
While collecting paperbark, Shay found the first clue of the season and quickly pulled Briana aside to fill her in on the deets. With said deets being that the hidden immunity idol is literally stuck to the front of Jonathan’s podium at tribal council. The first catch being they need to snag it in front of the tribe to activate it and the second being that there was a second clue hidden somewhere in their camp. Which was promptly found by tribunal queen Chrissy in front of most of her tribemates. Though given she is unsure about what tribal council is, I assume Shay and Briana are all good, right?
The tribes reconvened with my love Jonathan for the first epic immunity challenge where we learnt poor Alex had somehow sustained an injury and had to be supported (or carried) as they arrived at the challenge. His ‘in-law’ Jay was rattled by how pained his (ex-)girlfriend’s brother was, though it was quickly dropped to make way from some brief shade amongst loved ones. After which Jonathan explained that the tribes would have to race over a ramp carrying a battering ramp before smashing some walls, climbing over a ladder and then smashing a series of targets. And since Alex was injured, he was sitting out of the challenge with the Blood tribe also having to sit someone out to make things fair, with Andy’s sister Kate volunteering.
Which is iconic, since Sandra stayed silent, desperate to prove herself in a challenge and I live for that fire.
The tribes both shot out of the gate at the first obstacle with the Water tribe getting out to the earliest of leads on the walls until Croc took control, directing the Blood tribe and pushing them ahead. The Water tribe continued to struggle with the second wall as the Blood tribe whipped up the tower and started to toss their hammers at the targets, after a wistful look back at Shay from Ben and honestly, swoon. I ship the shit out of them. Croc and Jordan tossed hammer after hammer, only taking out one before Jay and Ben traded out and quickly knocked out two more. All while the Water tribe continued to work at their second wall before Mark straight up charged at it himself. Sophie switched out with Jay before she and Ben took out the last two targets and snatched immunity for their tribe.
Most importantly, keeping Sandra in the game for one more episode.
Back at camp the tribe discovered their fire had gone out in their absence which is just rubbing salt in the wounds at this point. Chrissy was worried about Alex, having quickly bonded with him and loving how kind and calm he is. As Mel tried to give him a consult, thankfully being a chiropractor, Chrissy and Jordie spoke about how nervous they are for him. Andy meanwhile was relishing the thought of going to tribal council, though tried to play things cool. As the tribe caught up in the water, Andy floated the idea of booting Alex which honestly makes sense given he can barely walk but given the looks on everyone else’s faces, I’m not sure it will be this cut and dry.
Shay and Briana meanwhile went for a walk to come up with a game plan for snatching the idol before Chrissy, to ideally get out the icon. They caught up with Nina, Khanh and Jordie by the well, with everyone agreeing that Chrissy is a liability to the tribe and needs to go. Nina however was just agreeing to their face, having learnt from her mother not to idly sit by and make decisions that benefit other people’s games and as such, knowing that she can’t work with Andy, she wanted to get rid of him instead. As such, she pulled Mark aside to talk things through with him before getting Mark to straight up suggest they get rid of Andy instead and ugh, how are the Diaz-Twine’s this damn good at the game?!
Jordie snuck up on them like a larrikin before quickly switching into game mode, willing to jump on board to get rid of Andy. Nina decided she would work on KJ and Mel, while Jordie would get Josh and Alex on board while all of them tell Andy that Alex will get the boot and ugh, I feel bad for him.
Speaking of Josh and Alex, they were catching up with Chrissy with Alex sharing how heartbroken he would be to be the first boot. Meanwhile Nina was busy pulling KJ and Mel in on the plan before finding Khanh and easily getting him on side too. She then caught up with Andy, Mark and Jordie, calmly talking about getting rid of Alex at tribal council before Andy threw out the idea of splitting the vote between Alex and Chrissy. Which only made Nina more concerned about Andy, and therefore confident in her decision.
At tribal council Alex spoke about how disappointed he was to be injured before the first immunity challenge and how big of a target it has put on his back. Out of nowhere, Shay and Chrissy jumped up to claim the immunity idol, with the former circling the podium as Chrissy calmly snatched it out from underneath her rival. And ugh, Slayelle, I was rooting for you! Jordie pointed out that that really shows what kind of game they’re playing, while Andy suggested the idol hasn’t changed anything for him. Which is something everyone agreed with, while Briana suggested that sometimes knowing there is an idol in the game means they have to burn some votes to get rid of it, threatening my love Chrissy.
Jordie spoke about the battle between everyone’s minds ahead of tribal council, admitting that it was hard to vote out someone you like even though they are injured. Briana continued her attack and straight up called out Chrissy for being a weak link in the challenge and let’s just say, the icon was not happy about it. On the flipside, Andy praised everyone for being so great and putting in so much effort. But he was also very ready to get rid of Alex given he is injured. Chrissy reiterated that Alex is likely in a little bit of trouble, while Nina admitted she was parking Alex’s injury and instead wanted to come out of tribal council knowing who she can trust. While Andy assured everyone that if he spoke to them today, he wants to work with them.
With that the tribe voted and despite Alex literally spending most of the day in excruciating pain, Chrissy (needlessly) played her idol on herself and Princess Nina got her way as Andy found himself becoming the first boot.
And ugh, I feel so bad for the guy. Despite Nina and Mark already proving to be an iconic duo.
I was surprisingly overwhelmed to see Andy arrive at Loser Lodge, knowing how hard it would have been to come back after his first season only to try and adapt his game, only to quickly be cut from the game. Again, because I fear I would fare similarly should I ever accept Jonathan’s standing invitation to compete. I pulled him in for a hug, told him how proud of him I was and reminded him that he was just blindsided by Sandra’s daughter, which as a superfan, should be an honour. After which I toasted to his Survivor career with a fresh Irish Shandy Meldrum.
My brother went through a period of advocating for the majesty of a shandy, though in my opinion, they generally end up ruining both the lemonade and the beer. But by adding a bit of whiskey, it truly makes it sing. Or at the very least, it makes it pack more of a punch which is honestly what you want after becoming the first boot.
Enjoy!
Irish Shandy Meldrum Serves: 1.
Ingredients ¼ cup Irish whiskey ½ cup beer, ideally IPA for the flavour ½ cup lemonade
Method Pour the shot into a glass, followed by the beer and then lemonade.
Previously on Drag Race UK 12 queens entered the Werk Room for another battle royale of my favourite franchise. While nine sisters were eliminated along the way, it was the quiet achiever Ella that rose to the top. Winning challenge after challenge, after challenge (and challenge) until Vanity was eliminated and she battled for the crown against Kitty and Krystal.
Despite slaying the competition, Ella didn’t end up taking the crown though some would argue what she won was better than that anyway. My heart!
While underestimated by her sisters at the beginning of the competition, I knew that someone that could come up with a name like that was full of talent and from start to finish, she shon.
Like Bimini before her, she showed versatility, charisma and so much talent and while she may not have finished with the crown, her career can only go from strength to strength.
Which is what I reiterated to her through gritted teeth as I pulled her off stage to toast her with (a kinda ugly, sorry Ella) Hot Nutella Vaday.
What my photography skills don’t show is how damn near perfect this drink is. I mean, sure, we all love a Hot Choc – or Coco – but when one has the opportunity to go with nutella, they should take it. So take it.
Enjoy!
Hot Nutella Vaday Serves: 2.
Ingredients 2 cups milk ⅓ cup Nutella whipped cream, for topping (which I forgot to do, I assume, because we’re all bottoms)
Method Like most of my drinks and salads, this one is a little bit difficult to process.
Pop the milk and nutella in a saucepan, whisk until well combined and pop over low heat until cooked through.
You could also do it direct in a mug using your meek-ro-wah-vay, though that always runs the risk of getting dirty, dirty, dirty.
Previously on Canada’s Drag Race the dolls starred in the original rusical, Under the Big Top. And damn, let’s just say that the queens put the great in the great north. Pythia, Synthia and Gia slayed from start to finish, while Icesis got trapped in her head and poor Oceane was a couple of steps behind. Ultimately it was Pythia that rose to the top while last week’s winner Icesis landed in the bottom, though did manage to save herself as sweet Océane exited the competition.
Backstage the dolls were heartbroken to lose such an iconic queen, until they realised she wrote a full-blown farewell letter as her mirror message while her dear friend Icesis focused on the fact she just slayed the lip sync. While everyone else meanwhile felt nervous that Icesis now proved you can go from top to bottom in the blink of an eye and as such, they need to stay on their games. The queens congratulated Pythia for her killer win before Beth once again started to sob, heartbroken to still be in the competition when someone as iconic as Océane went home. Though she did apologise for cussing out Kendall, so all’s well that ends well. Maybe.
The next day Pythia’s head looked over the dolls like a (no shade) more polished Ornacia as Ru delivered a cryptic message referencing horror movies. Which Amanda quickly explained was because this week they will be tasked with over-acting in the horror movie, Screech! And as the last victor, Pythia was given the job of casting the roles.
As Amanda fled, the dolls sat down to read through the script with Beth quickly identifying the role that she wanted before they even digested the first page. Beth quickly shut down Stephanie when she suggested that she would also like the narrator role. Icesis won rock, paper, scissors to get the butch role, Suki was thrilled to be playing horny, Kendall was Brooke, Adriana was Brad, Synthia was Amanda and well, the rest weren’t as simple to identify. So sorry!
The dolls split up to read their lines with Stephanie admitting that she routinely sees ghosts while suffering sleep paralysis. Which is a sentence which will now haunt my dreams and make me share the experience, no doubt! Synthia meanwhile was stressed about getting a role that she didn’t relate to and was worried about how she will pull it off, while Adriana was ready to slay, despite not exactly getting what the word ‘ominous’ means. Kimora meanwhile was thrilled to play the nerdy screamer and then she and Icesis moaned, which was both terrifying and erotic.
Everyone started to get in drag to film with Kendall sharing that Halloween was her first experience in drag and also is her sobriety date and as such, this is a meaningful challenge for her. She opened up about how hard she has fought to stay sober and ugh, I love how vulnerable and zaddy she is.
Amanda was joined by Fefe Dobson to direct the girls’ movie with Stephanie at an 11 at all times – and eating her hair – leading to Amanda requesting that she take a cheeky step back. Suki meanwhile was encouraged to go as horny as possible before Eve was praised for finally letting go and having fun in the challenge. Icesis lived for her butch drag, Kendall was hilarious as she read Brooke while Synthia was struggling with all the Handmaid’s Tale references of her character and damn, it was hard to watch because I love her so damn much.
Elimination Day arrived with Eve ready to take out her first victory while Synthia was terrified and mentally preparing to be in the bottom. Despite the fact Stephanie thought she was being genuine with her self praise, bless. The dolls started to prepare for the runway with Eve sharing that her father doesn’t know that she does drag and isn’t aware of the show, despite trying to bond more over the last few years. Gia shared that she was scared for her father to see her in drag until he turned up at a club one night and cheered her on, in the kind of heartwarming story I love on Drag Race.
And then poor Adriana shared the most fucked up story where her father’s side of the family was so homophobic that her father straight up catfished her first boyfriend to ruin the relationship. Fucked. Up. Jerk.
On the Good Girl Gone Bad Runway, Suki went from saint to sinner in the best way possible. Eve was a greyed out Marilyn, Stephanie was the sluttiest Dorothy Gale, Synthia was a green and black delight, Gia was a bacteria riddled glamazon, Pythia was a gorgeously possessed nun, Kimora gave us Papal Realness in a pageant circa Ancient Rome. Kendall too went from nun to devil in a far sexier reveal while Adriana was a stunning Marie Antoinette prior to the guillotine while Icesis was a sexy, yellow bunny.
When it came to the movie, Eve truly did slay the performance as the narrator. Icesis was hilarious as a dude bro, Kimora was delightfully nerdy while Stephanie was tragically one note. Gia played bimbo to perfection while Adriana was demented perfection as Brad. Though sadly, Synthia truly did struggle as A-martha, aka Amanda while Pythia was a demented Fairusa Balk. The long lost drag daughter of the slutty Suki. Oh but most importantly – spoiler alert – Jimbo was the killer and Stephanie – gay gasp – the only survivor.
Which was ironic, because Kimora, Icesis, Pythia and Suki were the ones sent to safety before the judges heaped praise on Eve, with them particularly proud of her finally shining. Stephanie was read for being one note, despite being great in that one note. They did love her runway, though. Synthia was read for being bland while Gia was praised for being so open to feedback and giving a delightfully camp runway. Despite her epic speech about her bravery for asking questions. Kendall was read for not taking the role far enough and preferring to improv her lines, despite the judges liking her look. Adriana meanwhile received universal praise for everything she did in the challenge and for serving a perfect look on the runway.
Backstage the dolls identified Eve as one of the tops before she and the rest of the dolls returned from the mainstage. Eve was proud to not cry while Stephanie shocked them with the fact she will clearly be in the bottom. Kendall shared that she was also in the bottom, disappointed that she let herself down and may be lip syncing against her dear friend Synthia. Aka the other bottom. Eve felt Gia got more praise than her, while Adriana shared that her look was positively beloved. Stephanie meanwhile started to break down and while I get it, I wish she was prepping for the lip sync because I need her to fight.
Ultimately Gia was sent to safety, handing Adriana her first victory of the season. After Eve joined the rest of the safe girls, Kendall narrowly avoided the bottom, leaving Synthia and Stephanie to battle it out for safety. And girl, it was murder on the dance floor from the very frist bars of Fefe Dobson’s Ghost. Synthia came out of the gate ready to save herself, hitting every damn lyric and all the emotions while Stephanie gave sexy, camp and comedy. While I was thrilled to see my dear Synthia survive, I was heartbroken that it came at the cost of my love, Stephanie Prince.
As she joined me in the Werk Room, I quickly pulled Stephanie in for a hug and told her how proud of her I was. While she only lasted three episodes, Stephanie’s charm and talent shined bright, and well, I am going to miss her. After processing all that emotion, we laughed, cried and then settled in for a delightful Dark and Stormphanie Prince each.
You know me, if it’s gots alcohol, I’ve gots to have it. But this one is pretty damn sweet to boot. I mean, sure, it is simple but how can you go past a dark and stormy? You just can’t!
Enjoy!
Dark and Stormphanie Prince Serves: 1.
Ingredients ice 30ml dark rum 1 cup ginger beer a lime wedge
Method Place ice in a highball glass and pour over the rum.
Top with ginger beer and squeeze in the lime wedge.
Previously on Survivor the Yase tribe were struggling to comprehend their terrible run in the challenges until Queen Tiffany turned things around and became a beast in the immunity challenge, saving her tribe from another tribal council. While Brad managed to jag himself an extra vote and found the three-way idol, he and Xander were still looking for a third and as such, he lost his vote AND the right to play any advantages. Which sadly was enough for Ricard, Shan and JD to join together and blindside him from the game.
Back at camp Genie was annoyed to be left out of the blindside, though given she tripped on her way back to camp she probably was frustrated by that too. She cussed them out, explaining that she is frustrated to be the one that looks after everyone but they don’t even respect her enough to tell her. Shan then dropped the bomb that Brad wasn’t as close to Genie as she thought, given he only told her about both of his advantages and as such, she should kinda be grateful. Essentially. This in turn annoyed JD who was frustrated that Shan made such a big deal about him keeping his extra vote a secret from her when she was keeping her own secrets from him.
And ugh, this is the kind of messy that I love.
The next day the tribes met up with Jiffy Pop for the first reward challenge of the season where they would have to toss a ball into a track and race to the end to collect it. Once they all have their balls, they need to dig under a log and race to the end where they must each land their balls in a trough. First two tribes to win snagging themselves a visit from a Fijian survival expert for first place and a single fish for second. Despite their reputation as the weakest tribe, Yase got out to an early lead as Ua nipped at their heels while Heather kept Luvu firmly in last place. Ua took the lead when it came to landing their balls while Tiffany was once again the star performer of Yase as the two tribes snagged their rewards, putting Heather out of her misery.
She immediately started to sob over letting her team down which honestly was heartbreaking to watch, until her fellow castaways cheered her on for giving her best and not giving up.
Back at camp Yase recapped their shitty run thus far in the season and how this core four has really come together to succeed, with queen Tiffany rightly talking about how she is really killing the challenges now. But before we could even dig into that, Tiffany discovered a bunch of baby turtles hatching and oh my goodness, they are so damn cute!
Over at Ua their survival expert was climbing up a palm tree and literally doing tricks and ugh, I love him! He gave them recipes, tips, taught them how to catch and prepare fish and seemingly made everyone come together in harmony. Wait, no – Ricard felt he had learnt enough survival skills now and as such, was happy to get rid of Genie ASAP.
To which I say, no. Nope. Not on my watch, Ricard.
Meanwhile over at Luvu Erika and Deshawn were praising each other’s game while Sydney and Danny were fishing around them and Heather was processing their loss back at camp. Erika shared that she is more than ready to get rid of someone, feeling anxious to finally play the game and get a damn torch. After returning to shore, Sydney tried to make fire and flipped out upon failing. And with that, she realised that they should get rid of Sydney given she is so volatile. Sadly for Erika, Deshawn took this information directly to Sydney and as such, the duo decided that they need to get rid of Erika when the time comes. The duo then roped in Danny with Deshawn suggesting that they should throw the upcoming challenge to deal with her ASAP, though given Danny is a professional athlete, he wasn’t sure if he could bring himself to do it.
Speaking of the immunity challenge, the tribes reconvened where they learnt they would race through the water collecting bags of logs which they would use to release a key which in turn would release three rings which they must land on a post. Ua got out to the earliest lead while Luvu nipped at their heels before snapping it despite Deshawn desperately trying to throw the challenge. As Evvie feverishly swam in the wrong direction for Yase. Naseer single handedly kept the tribe in front as Yase slowly caught up to Ua. As Deshawn threw the rings as far away from the posts as possible, Tiffany and JD quickly landed their first rings. Liana gave Yase the lead before Naseer started tossing for Luvu and landed two rings. Ultimately Yase were first to snag immunity before Naseer finally landed his third ring and sent Ua back to tribal council.
Back at camp Genie pulled JD aside to try and form a duo against the other two, with Genie telling him that she plans to roll her shot in the dark die. JD agreed that he feels on the outs but shared that he desperately didn’t want to roll his dice yet, in the hope of convincing her to do the same. JD then caught up with Ricard and filled him in on the plans, assuring him that he will not turn on him. Meanwhile Shan and Genie were catching up, with the former assuring her that the plan is to get rid of JD and as such, she doesn’t need to worry about playing her dice. Shan and Ricard then caught up, deciding that Shan should try and convince JD to hand over the extra vote again and neutralise the threat so that they can make a clear decision.
With that Shan got to work playing JD, talking about how paranoid she is about his extra vote and assuring him that she will give the vote back after they both survive tribal council. Again. For the second episode in a row. Oh and once she had it in her pocket, she decided that maybe she should blindside him again since she now has ownership of it, per her interpretation of the rules. Which for the record, didn’t work for Cirie.
At tribal council Genie spoke about how tired and disappointed she is to be back at tribal council while Ricard spoke about how it gets harder and harder to vote someone out each week. Shan agreed, complete with fart jokes, while JD admitted that watching on at home is far easier, given you have all the information that the castaways on the island don’t. Genie brought up being blindsided by the Brad vote and how it makes her feel uneasy, given the tribe clearly doesn’t trust her. Ricard tried to play it cool with Genie admitting that she was planning to play her shot in the dark before JD cautioned her to not do something stupid that could screw over a potential ally.
Ricard admitted that he has had his name written down – hey Genie – while Shan spoke about how they need to play hard if they don’t want to be among the 17 losers of the season. JD spoke about how his plans before the game started were completely different to how he has played and he still has a lot he wants to achieve. While poor Genie started to cry, heartbroken about her dreams coming to an end. With that the tribe voted and while Genie elected to not play her shot in the dark, it proved to be the right move as Shan and Ricard joined her to blindside poor JD from the game.
Obviously young JD was heartbroken as her arrived in Loser Lodge, but I quickly pulled him in for a hug and reminded him, superfan to superfan, that the game is hard and while he didn’t win he should still be proud of himself. From finding advantages to making big moves, he tried and while not everything worked out, he was an entertaining presence. And when that didn’t make him feel better, I got to work perking him up with tales of Malcolm, Woo and Ozzy. Which was enough to perk him up enough to toast a game well played with my Jairusty Nail Robinson.
While a rusty nail is a simple drink, it is the simplicity that makes it so damn good. Earthy, rich and warming, this little number is perfect for a quiet night of reflection. Shit, that was oddly deep, right? Or am I just that vapid that I think that is deep? Who cares, I guess.
Previously on Australian Survivor Dani and Andrew tried to get their revenge after Emmett was blindsided. His plan? To win every immunity and get rid of George. As you can imagine, he didn’t win immunity as Hayley scored her second in a row which set in motion the plan to get rid of Andrew. Well, Hayley, George and Cara did while Wai wasn’t sure she could betray Andrew again and ultimately vote him out. Wai however stuck with them and he was booted from the game. But obviously, there was a twist, as Jonathan let Andrew pick one of four urns with one containing a scroll announcing him as safe and returning him to the game. Which he didn’t pick, instead sending him to join the jury. Officially.
The next morning Wai was shocked that she had made it to Day 40 while the tribe hung out, exhausted and pondering how much harder the game is getting each and every day. Wai was still feeling guilty to have voted out her friend Andrew, despite the fact George told her that he was gunning for her. And while she did believe it in the moment, she also knows that George needs to go ASAP.
Speaking of George, he was thrilled to be the last man standing. Particularly since he is in control of the tribe. Just not in control of his washing, as poor Dani tried to explain how to wring out clothes. Oh and to continue her boss ways, she then grabbed a massive stump that George was struggling to pick up, lobbed it over her shoulder and dazzled Wai with her strength.
After Wai gushed about how inspirational she finds Dani, the two of them joined Flick and Hayley by the water in the hope of forming an alliance together and, you guessed it, take control of the game. That being said, George and Cara soon joined them and any strategy chat was shut down. But best believe Dani is going to try wooing them before the next tribal council because Cara and George are a lost cause and she refuses to go home this early.
The tribe met up with Jonathan for the next immunity challenge where they would each have to race out in the water to a pontoon, climb a ladder to retrieve some balls, swim some more, grab some more balls, race over an obstacle and get to the end and toss two balls into a goal for victory. As everyone leaped into the water, Wai stayed put on the pontoon and forfeited the challenge while Hayley and Flick powered into the lead. George’s fear of heights got the better of him as he gave up on the challenge while the other four battled for safety. Flick started to pull away as Hayley tried to hold pace with Dani and Cara nipping at her heels. Flick and Hayley desperately started to shoot their baskets, though quickly ran out of balls before Dani arrived and scored her first point. Hayley and Cara then scored a basket each before Dani returned and put everyone out of their misery by taking out the win.
Back at camp George was far less confident than before, given that Dani’s immunity means Flick is their only option of going home. While there are still three saviour urns remaining, George is undeterred, given sticking to the top four is the best for George, Cara, Hayley and Wai. Though he does worry that they may have a change of heart at tribal council and to quote him most other episodes, his goose would be cooked.
The foursome caught up by the billabong, with George getting more and more desperate as he tried to get them to stay targeting the Brawns. Which is honestly the thing that would encourage them to flip. George approached the Brawns to see who they were thinking of targeting, with Dani and Flick kind of just ignoring him. Instead, Flick suggested the duo approach Hayley and Wai and flip them to their side to get rid of George.
Hayley meanwhile admitted that she would be in however it was up to Flick and Dani to convince Wai. Which they did, barely even uttering a sentence.
Sadly for them, Cara was loitering near the shelter and as such approached George to fill him in on the potential issue, despite not actually hearing anything. With that, the duo tried to figure out the best plan of attack because George didn’t want Cara to burn her idol just yet. George decided that the best way to move forward was to talk to Wai and see where she is at. He implored Wai to stick with the sensible, stable option and deal with what happens at the top four when it happens.
Hayley meanwhile wanted to turn on George and get rid of him, though admitted that the urns make her nervous given she doesn’t want someone coming back into the game angry. As such, getting rid of Flick and having her return isn’t as dangerous as an angry George. Though if Flick came back, she is also a physical threat and could snatch immunity, meaning she could be the one going home.
At tribal council George delighted Jonathan and the jury by rocking Cara’s skirt and showing off his gams while also trying to fit in and avoid being booted. Dani meanwhile was thrilled to be immune, while Flick admitted that she is clearly the most likely to go. She did however point out that the four Brains are fractured and as such, it is a matter of when not if they are going to split. George assured them that there is safety in numbers and as such, the foursome know it is wise to stick together. Dani then made a questionable move, telling George that Hayley and Wai approached them today and were planning to boot him tonight. Throwing the two most likely people to align with her under the bus.
Wai admitted that she had a conversation but at the end of the day, conversations can be misdirection and they mean nothing until you vote. While Cara grew nervous, Wai spoke about the urns complicating things because you don’t want to make a move and have them blow up your games. Hayley agreed that they have definitely made her less likely to flip. This had the opposite effect, making Cara exceedingly more nervous while George just tried to reiterate the importance of staying stable until the urns are gone.
With that the tribe voted and Cara’s nerves got the better of herself as she played her hidden immunity idol for herself. Sadly for her, it was unnecessary as Hayley and Wai stuck with them and booted Flick from the game. Well, until she cracked her urn and found herself saved, returning to the game and finally putting an end to the non-elimination tribals for the season – huzzahs all round!
I mean, if there are two non-eliminations in play each season, can’t we just permanently include Redemption Island and call it a day? I know it can be sucky, but at least every single person has equal opportunity that way. Rant over.
The next day the tribe were gagged to experience outback rain, with George glad to finally tick off another Survivor experience. Dani meanwhile was growing even more annoyed by George, going for a wander with Flick to get out of camp. Flick thankfully was feeling lucky to still be in the game and as such, rallied the two of them to try and find and crack. And well, for Dani, she was still laser focused on getting rid of George. Speaking of George, he and the Brains trio were back at camp living their best lives unaware that Dani and Flick were going to continue their campaign to flip Wai and Hayley to their side.
George was frustrated that not only had Flick returned to the game, but that Cara wasted her idol leaving them vulnerable. Never mind the fact that it means another may be hidden. Oh and it shows that Cara didn’t trust Hayley and Wai enough to stick with her. While George chastised Cara in front of their other allies, Cara admitted that the urns made her absolutely mad with paranoia, apologised and all was forgiven. Right?
The tribe reconvened with Jonathan for the latest reward challenge where the top six would each have to swim out to collect a bag in the water, build a pole with the sticks inside said bag, release a key, unlock sandbags and then shoot said sandbags into a spinning target. Oh and it was for an overnight reward to a spa, so you just know they were gagging to win. Flick, Hayley and George got out to the slightest of leads, but they obviously all came together to build their poles. George was first to try and quickly snapped his pole, as did Hayley and Dani. After some slight adjustments, both Hayley and Dani tried again before Flick joined them as Hayley knocked her key off.
Hayley quickly started trying to shoot her bags as Flick joined her. Hayley was first to land a sack, followed by Flick as George once again gave up in the challenge and instead opted to watch the battle. Dani eventually joined the others, quickly landing three bags in quick succession before Hayley and Flick tried to rally. But it was to no avail as Dani took out yet another reward. Obviously Jonathan told her that she’d be able to take someone to join her, opting to take Flick before Jonathan gave her one more pass to the spa. Which she quickly offered to Hayley, as George looked like he wanted to throw up.
The dolls arrived at their makeshift bush spa and immediately started gorging on everything in sight. That was until they saw a case with body wash, shampoo, conditioner and loofahs and they quickly got to work pampering themselves. Once they were all clean, they slipped into the spa and poured themselves a drink as they started to discuss the game. Obviously Dani and Flick quickly tried to flip Hayley to their side and while it seemed like it was a no brainer for her to flip at this point anyway, she admitted that Cara playing the idol at the last tribal council made her begin to lose trust in them.
The next day the spa trio were surprised with a fresh breakfast before immediately solidifying their new alliance, vowing to finally get rid of George.
Meanwhile back at camp, the remaining three were cold, starving and without a fire, while George was more concerned about Hayley flipping on them due to the reward. He and Cara went for a walk and while she assured him that Hayley is definitely still with them, he was nervous enough to truly fight for immunity rather than giving up in the next challenge.
Speaking of immunity, the groups reconnected with Jonathan where they learnt they would be battling in the biggest immunity challenge of the season. They would start tethered to a rope around a frame before they would unwind themselves enough to go over a series of obstacles to release a key to unlock themselves. They would then need to collect a bag of tiles, shoot the tiles into a goal AND then use the tiles to solve a word puzzle. Hayley got out to an early lead but was quickly joined by Dani and Flick, while poor Wai struggled to even hold a hammer.
This gave George the chance to overtake them before they all joined up at the final stage of the challenge. Dani and Hayley maintained the earliest of leads, getting to work on the puzzle before Flick and Cara joined them. Hayley quickly landed three words, while Dani placed two random ones and then all of a sudden, they came to a stand still before Wai finally arrived at the puzzle, whipped through it and took out individual immunity like an absolute queen. She then started sobbing, shocked by the fact she won immunity and damn, I just love her so much.
Back at camp everyone rallied around, congratulating Wai on her win and reminding her that she is a strong and powerful woman. Giddy, she caught up with Hayley to lock in their allegiance to each other and affirming themselves as ride or die. Meanwhile Dani and Flick were feeling vulnerable, but felt that things were in the best spot to flip the girls given Wai is safe enough to make a move and Hayley was already on board at reward.
As Hayley worked Wai, Flick and Dani decided the best plan was to do a split vote if the girls are on their side, with George being their true target. After locking in the plan with the girls, Hayley caught up with George and Cara and were pitched the exact same plan, instead splitting the vote on Dani and Flick. Hayley obviously agreed that she was on board with this, keen to get rid of George’s target Dani.
While Hayley went for a relaxing swim, glad to not be on anyone’s radar, George and Cara got to work hunting for an idol. They were quickly joined by Dani and Flick, and while everyone gave up one by one, Flick persevered and found one, ready to finally get rid of George. After a quick celebration, the duo decided to keep their idol and secret from Hayley just in case.
Speaking of Hayley she was thrilled to be playing in the middle of the tribe and holding all the power in the upcoming vote. But with that power, comes nerves given she and Wai see it as the decision that will either win or lose them the game. On one hand, getting rid of George has proven very difficult and as such, this may be their only shot, while getting rid of Dani also eliminates a massive threat for the title. Oh and one of the two physical threats.
Both George and Flick started to get very nervous about tribal council, the former knowing that he will be in the one to go if they flip while Flick just second guessed whether she should just play the idol in case. And then third, fourth, fifth and sixth guessed it.
At tribal council the jury was gagged to see Wai wearing the immunity necklace with her admitted to being so shocked to have won. Dani meanwhile was nervous to be without the necklace before George admitted that both she and Flick are very threatening. George continued to lay it on thick before talk turned to Dani taking Hayley on the reward with her. Cara admitted it was a wise move, given Hayley is a known flipper and as such, was the smartest person to take. Hayley admitted that while Dani and Flick did try and woo her, the only person that is truly safe tonight in Wai. And only Wai.
This made George very nervous, imploring people to stick with the plan. Flick meanwhile got fiery, turning to the jury and saying that she wants to see the winner doing a combination of outwitting, outlasting and outplaying people and given George has quit in two challenges, she finds that disappointing and doesn’t want to reward him. This made George very angry, telling Flick that he has fought the entire game, persevering against all odds and she should stop playing the player and instead play the ball like he does. Dani jumped aboard the shade train before Hayley admitted that she will be voting with the people she wants to move forward with in the game. End. Of. Story.
With that the tribe voted, Flick held on to her idol and the votes were neatly split between Cara, Dani and Flick. The remaining three then re-voted and officially sent Dani from the game. Like the rest of this year’s cast – save maybe Benny – Dani was obviously a delight when we caught up in the Jury Villa, accepting that she was outplayed and ready to catch up with her dearest friend.
While we first met during one of my stints in prison, we formed a strong bond given I desperately needed to keep the guards on side for my survival. Dani being a queer icon, looked out for me and because of her, I fully committed to never grifting another soul on the boardwalk. As such, we’ve stayed in contact and regularly catch up to make sure I’m doing ok, while downing gallons of Dani Bubbeale Coffee.
Yeah, yeah – boba is great and all. But have you ever had damn BUBBLE COFFEE? It is perfect. Part Vietnamese coffee, part boba – this is sweet, refreshing and packs a punch. Just like my queen Dani.
Enjoy!
Dani Bubbeale Coffee Serves: 2-4.
Ingredients ½ cup milk ⅓ cup condensed milk ¾ cup quick-cooking tapioca pearls ice 4 cups cold brew coffee or in a pinch, coffee left to go cold
Method Whisk together the milk and condensed milk in a jug and cook the tapioca pearls as per packet instructions, chilling in cold water for a couple of minutes.
Place ice in four glasses, top with some tapioca and pour coffee amongst them. Pour in the milk and condensed milk.
Previously on Australian Survivor the tribes switched up, shunting the previously liberated Cara back to the Brain slums though thankfully stacking it with her friends. She and the Brawns first planned to take out Georgia, but Cara messed things up – or cooked it, if you will – and booted Daini by mistake. Meanwhile Hayley was very busy being a boss after blindsiding Joey, threatening the Brawn majority that she will happily idol out one of the OG Brawns if they don’t join her and the Brains. And since Wai and Andrew were both immune at the double tribal council, the Brawns had a 50:50 shot of getting things right. As such, Simon and co jumped ship and booted Shannon while Laura was the victim on Brains given Georgia was on medical leave and Rachel was also immune. But Laura got lucky, given the two tribes were solely booting one person and SImon went to town turning everyone on Shannon and she exited the game.
The next day things were relatively calm over in Camp Brawn, with Simon grateful to have won the battle with Shannon. While Flick was the only one to not vote in the majority, she was quickly bonding with Andrew and Wai, perfecting their shelter and keeping the camp functioning. Like a social Queen. Meanwhile Simon and Dani pulled Hayley aside to solidify their bond, with Simon sharing that he is so glad that she didn’t waste her idol because they’re all solid and Flick is screwed. Essentially. Sadly for him, the Brains are not on board with things as Hayley got to work building a bond with Flick to lock in the majority instead. And you know, get rid of Chelsea, Dani and Simon.
While Flick was obviously gutted to lose her ally Shannon, she had already moved on and was ready to jump ship and lock things in with the Brains. And well, the way she and Hayley spoke about the stupidity of Dani and Simon thinking an alliance of seven is better than their new one of five was just peak Survivor slash Queen players. Long may they rule, despite Simon’s speedo.
We checked in with the Brains where Kez was busy brushing her teeth with charcoal while Laura was just shocked to still be in the game after the last tribal. Laura clearly saw the breakdown of the alliances within the tribe and while there were no ins, she was ready to continue building relationships until one appeared. And well, maybe something is, as she and Kez went for a walk to chat. Which immediately made Cara and George very nervous, particularly the former given she straight up made a mistake and cost Daini the game. Something that enraged Kez.
My love Jonathan returned for the reward challenge where three people from each tribe would have to hold a pole across their shoulders with weights routinely added throughout the challenge. For tacos and margs, so you know the rewardless Cara was desperate for the Brains to pull something out. Gerald, Emmett and Kez stepped up for their tribe, battling Baden, Simon and Chelsea for the Brawns. Under George’s orders, the Brains opted to load most of the weight on Chelsea to eliminate her early, while Gerald was weighed down by the Brawns. After George decided Chelsea was struggling enough and likely to drop soon, he directed the tribe to focus on Simon to eliminate another threat. Which was wise, given Chelsea was the first one to drop at 35 minutes. She was quickly joined by Baden, leaving Simon as the sole person fighting for Brawn. Proving that George truly is an asset. Kez was the first one to drop for Brains, followed by Gerald who dropped out of nowhere after a lapse in concentration. Emmet and Simon continued to fight for over an hour, reaching 90kgs until Simon dropped and handed Brains victory.
And Queen Cara, the first bit of luxury in over two weeks.
The Brains were thrilled to discover their taco cart back at camp, with Cara in particular grateful for actual food. George meanwhile was just thrilled to knock back some margies, like the iconic Shonella themselves. While everyone joyously ate their tacos, the tribe got an even more joyous surprise to see Georgia return to camp, delighted that she was feeling better. Before plying her with tacos and margaritas, two of the worst things for an upset stomach. She reunited with Laura and Rach, ready to fight for their lives while Emmett, Gerald and Kez doubled down on the fact that one of them needed to go. ASAP.
Jonathan returned for this week’s immunity challenge where the tribes would need to push a sled through obstacles and fill it with sand bags they collect along the way, before using said sand bags to knock down a series of targets and snatch immunity. Brawn got out to the earliest of leads, collecting all of their sandbags and barrelling to the end while Emmett desperately tried to collect them, practically single handedly, for the Brains. While Emmett continued his heroics for the Brains, Dani slayed on the slingshot, knocking out two tiles before their rivals even made it to the end. As Gerald desperately tried to close the gap, Simon traded in for Brawn and cracked their third. Then Emmett traded out for Gerald and damn, he is a beast, knocking out three of the tiles just before Simon took out immunity for the Brawns. Just.
Back at camp things were feeling a little bit tense with Emmett frustrated to lose again, despite being immensely glad to be in the majority. Which really helps to dull the pain. He pulled the Brawn plus Cara and George majority aside and decided that since they continue to fail at taking out the minority, they will just vote for one person and hope for the best that it is the right one. Quickly locking in Georgia as the easy vote.
Returning to the camp, Georgia pulled Emmett aside to see what she could possibly do to save herself. She immediately questioned why he aligned with George and Cara, with Emmett admitting that they are volatile and as such, she proposed he joined with the Brain girls to take one of them out instead. Georgia continued to play into all of their fears and stroked their egos, with Kez joining and agreeing that she’d prefer some more stability in her allies. Particularly given Simon will come for her eventually. Sadly for the ladies, Emmett was having none of it and told them as much, apologising and wandering off while they prepared for their inevitable doom.
This infuriated Georgia, who was ready to do anything to tear him down and beat the patriarchy. The Brains girls opted to try and get Cara out no matter what, with Rachel deciding their best hope would be to pull Kez over to their side to at the very least, tie things up. Rachel and Laura pulled her aside, with Kez admitting that she is annoyed to be aligned with Cara given she ended Daini’s game. And just like that, the girls went in, playing on all of Kez’s fears and desires to try and pull her over to their side.
Emmett meanwhile started to worry that something was up, so pulled Kez aside to play into all of her fears of ruining the Brawn majority. Though given Kez gave zero fucks about taking out Cara since she isn’t actually Brawn, she shared that she would rather go to rocks than let Cara survive.
At tribal council George spoke about intra-tribal divisions as opposed to the fact there are alliances. Rachel obviously called bullshit before Emmett smugly spoke about not breaking when the girls came to him to make a deal. This infuriated the girls with Laura and Rach going in on his arrogance, calling him out for hating on George and Cara but solely sticking with them for the numbers. This irked the hell out of Emmett, who assured George and Cara that he never talked shit about them and wanted to go to the merge strong with them. Which Cara and George ate up.
Rachel spoke about the frustration of putting it all on the line to win despite being on the bottom, with Emmett telling her that if she really tried to win they wouldn’t be back here. Which is both smug and infuriating. Cara started to feel bad, telling Rachel that if maybe they approached someone else, like her, they would have had a different outcome. Laura pointed out that they went to the people who they actually thought would be open to something with them, while Kez said that she was always willing to jump the fence should it be beneficial for her. She spoke about being playdough and while Jonathan suggested Laura try and mould her, Laura calmly pointed out that she is not willing to tell a woman what to do with her autonomy.
Given that very pointed dig, Emmett started to panic, reiterating how important it is for them to stick together if they want to make it to the merge together. But Rach and co continued to be iconic, pointing out that Emmett is controlling things and to paraphrase them, is dominating decisions as the dominant, white heterosexual male. Again, to paraphrase. With that, the tribe voted, Queen Kez stood firm and poor Georgia found herself booted from the game mere moments after making her triumphant medical return.
While I was heartbroken to see my fellow Queenslander Georgia walk into Loser Lodge, I was thrilled that she was able to see out the game rather than medevaced. Despite being joyously reunited and catching up, things got super awks between us when she asked where her Georgia Cheeseburgers were and well, I didn’t bother to make her any. Instead, we downed a couple of Georgia Ray Juleps, which thankfully washed away the post-boot pain and the awkwardness.
Despite being well-known as someone who would suck the alcohol out of a deodorant, that doesn’t factor in when I say that this little baby is a pure delight. Sweet and fruity with a punch of mint, this is a refreshing way to bring a little life back to your soul.
Enjoy!
Georgia Ray Julep Serves: 1.
Ingredients 90ml cognac 20ml peach liqueur 1 tsp sugar syrup a dash or two of bitters 8 mint leaves
Method Place all the ingredients in a cocktail shaker and give a quick shake.
Pour into an old fashioned glass filled with crushed ice.
Previously on Survivor South Africa, twenty brand spanking new castaways were dropped off on the tip of South Africa, with everyone on the Vuna tribe quickly falling in love with Anesu and wanting to align with her. Which, same. While I fell in love with Chappies, for bravely showing us his Chappie. Over at Zamba, Dino put a target on his back after snatching an individual immunity necklace during the marooning challenge, and Shaun and Qieän put one on theirs for looking for an idol. But it turns out none of them were the actual target, as zaddy Jason worked too hard to try and save Shaun from getting booted and as such, found himself booted from the game.
The next day Shaun pulled Renier and Anela aside to apologise for his desperate performance at tribal council, though thanked them for ultimately saving him. Oh and reminded them that Dino is only looking out for Dino. Remember when he went for immunity rather than supplies?! Renier went for a walk and caught up with Amy, sharing with us that they have a very secret alliance going on and they plan to ride it for as long as possible without people catching on to how close they actually are. And just like that, Renier is my favourite.
Over at Vuna Paul outed himself as a Bear Grylls type, with everyone rallying around and praising him for keeping them protected and covered under the shelter. Then out of nowhere Pinty and Carla kinda started fighting, with Carla surmising that Pinty just doesn’t like her and nooooo, I love both of them and this makes me sad.
My love Nico returned for this week’s reward challenge where the tribes would each race out to a cube over water, climb over and inside to retrieve puzzle pieces. And then you know, race back and then use the pieces to solve the puzzle, with the victor getting an epic fishing kit. Paul continued his dominance and got out to an early lead for Vuna while Amy held Zamba up. Side note, Chappies looked like a babe as he climbed the cube in his boxer briefs. In any event, Santoni held them up big time but somehow both tribes managed to be neck and neck on the puzzle. Apparently it was harder than it looked as each tribe tapped out puzzle solvers multiple times, before Zamba slowly started to pull ahead and ultimately snatched victory.
Back at Vuna the tribe was disappointed to have lost, though Chappies reminded them it was bound to happen before Carla suggested it would be good to be humbled at a reward challenge, rather than immunity so they shouldn’t let it get them down. Chappies, Paul, Pinty and Anesu caught up, with Chappies sharing the information about his diplomatic immunity from the previous episode. But that wasn’t the main focus, since we learnt that Anesu doesn’t know whether she can trust Paul and wondered why he was included in the discussion in the first place.
Meanwhile Zambia were all smiles as the tribe celebrated their success, praising Dino for dominating the puzzle component. Though it did make everyone wary about letting him get too far given the number of puzzle challenges towards the end game. Which he realised. Quickly.
Back at Vuna Chappies and Paul caught up, with the former zaddy suggesting they pull in Santoni, given it is very likely that she will be sent to Immunity Island should they lose immunity and as such, keeping her for themselves to give them knowledge. Back at camp, Tyson was trying to run his numbers and was appearing to trust everyone but Mike, which was a feeling shared by Queen Pinty. Anesu meanwhile was catching up with Wardah by the well, locking in their trust with each other and Tyson. They agreed that Santoni is the most likely person going to Immunity Island and as such, she isn’t going to be an option to vote out should it come to it and as such, they need to keep their options open.
Like us, Carla realised it was too early to scramble but did it anyway, chatting with Kiran about how they can protect their ally Mike. And to do that, identified Queen Pinty as the easiest to turn the entire tribe on. Pinty then started a fight with Carla back at camp and ugh, I feel like this isn’t going to end well for one of them. Loving the drama however is Santoni, given it means the target is off her back. For now.
Nico returned for the Immunity Challenge where the tribes raced through an obstacle course carrying heavy bags full of sandbags and coconuts. At the end, they use the sandbags to knock over a table of blocks and once clean, they need to rebuild the logo. Vuna got out to a massive lead as Amy struggled with the see-saw obstacle for Zamba. Then Anela happened, decimating the blocks for Zamba and closing the gap, with Qieän and Dino making the most of his handiwork and throwing the puzzle together quickly, snatching Immunity out from under Vuna.
As predicted, my dearest Santoni was sent to Immunity Island where she was challenged to swing a loop on a rope and try and snag it on a hook for the chance for a clue to a hidden immunity idol. Which she quickly won, learning that the idol is hidden in a log behind the seats at tribal council. Aka this is a great day for my new Queen, Santoni.
Back at Vuna the rest of the tribe were struggling with the weather and relocated to a nearby cave for the night in the hope of staying dry long enough to make it to tribal council.
The next day the camp looked absolutely disheveled as the tribe all huddled together for warmth. But being Survivor, they quickly split up with Tyson and Kiran debating the merits between voting Mike and Pinty. Mike and Carla approached Anesu to float getting rid of Pinty, with Anesu quickly highlighting the duos in the tribe but conveniently keeping herself out of things. She gauged whether they would have enough votes to get rid of Pinty, cautioning them that Mike is likely the target if they don’t manage to flip it.
Anesu and Kiran caught up, with Kiran happy to get rid of Pinty as she is so abrasive with him. She then iconically approached them and made Kiran uncomfortable as she interrogated him, before asking to speak to Anesu alone. Locking Kiran in as a Pinty vote, no doubt. Pinty suggested that getting rid of Mike would mean Carla would be alone and need friends, and would no doubt align with them, unaware that Carla is leading the charge against her.
Back on Immunity Island, Santoni was making the most of her private time, hunting for an idol or clue freely. Which once again, she quickly found, directing her to search back at camp and dig three paces from a scoop or something. And now, Santoni needs to win because she is a damn icon.
Back at Vuna, Anesu caught up with Wardah to talk about the dueling plans admitting that she really doesn’t care which route they go, but if Pinty is abrasive, they will always find a time to get rid of her. Pinty approached Tyson and when it didn’t seem to be going anywhere, she decided to share with him that Chappies won the diplomatic advantage at the fire challenge and as such, now Tyson sees him as a threat. Pinty then went to Chappies and didn’t say anything but convinced him that he can’t trust Mike, unaware he really shouldn’t trust Pinty.
At tribal council Santoni quickly cased the joint for the hidden immunity idol while Wardah spoke about people starting to get irritated by everyone’s little ticks. Carla admitted they might learn they have a black sheep after the vote before Tyson admitted that the mood back at camp was definitely nervous and anxious. Anesu said that being relaxed about the vote generally means you’re out of the loop and as such, they all should be nervous. Santoni then announced that her immunity comes at a price and as such, she doesn’t have a vote.
Chappies spoke about the need to build relationships to make it further, with Pinty agreeing her odds should be ok if she has the relationships she thinks she does. Anesu shared her choice was all about tribe harmony, while Mike was focusing on trusting those that he feels he should and Kiran agreed that he just wants unity. WIth that the tribe voted and my dear Queen Pinty was sadly blindsided from the game.
I was heartbroken that my girl Pints didn’t get a full chance to shine and pulled her in for a hug, which she quickly pushed me out of. Given she is a strong, independent woman and doesn’t want me patronising her with pity. As such, she sat down and we got to reconnecting over a Pintky or seven.
Sometimes the simplest drinks are the tasiests, aromatic, punchy and sweet – this baby is the perfect way to drink away the post-boot blues.
Enjoy!
Pintky Serves: 4.
Ingredients ice 1 egg white 200ml grenadine 200ml gin
Method Fill a large cocktail shaker with ice. Top with ingredients and shake like a mo-fo.
Previously on RuPaul’s Drag Race Down Under the queens found themselves creating and marketing their very own yeasty spreads. Which really exemplifies why people don’t understand the attraction of any and all of the -mites. I mean, who even says, mmm, yeast! That being said Elektra somehow managed to make hers seem appealing, as she slayed the game and proved her doubters – aka Scarlet – wrong. At the other end of the pack, Ru expected more from Maxi while Etcetera went too far but wasn’t funny enough. As such, Elektra earnt her first victory while Maxi and Etcetera battled to survive with the iconic Etcetera going home.
Backstage the queens honoured the delight that is Etcetera, with Maxi admitting that she knew she had to pull out every damn trick she had if she wanted to compete with the whippersnapper. Scarlet was shocked to land high, while Karen from Finance was frustrated that beyond week one, she has been flatlining through the competition. Art tried to perk her up and say that she has a name to live up to, while some of the others don’t have a reputation that the judges are holding them against. Oh and speaking of no name – allegedly – Elektra was feeling her oats and agreed that she far and away had the best commercial. Which led to Art pointing out that they all packed what the packed, so the rest of the competition is going to be what it is. Elektra kikied with Kita and willed a double elimination to get rid of some more Aussies. Oh and she’d love one of them to be Scarlet.
But wouldn’t we all.
The next day the queens were feeling far more friendly, talking about their general horniness and how they’d love a Mini Challenge featuring 100 pit crew members pulling down their pants. Which, same. After briefly trying to set up the revirginized Art and Kita as a lovely drag power couple, they were interrupted by Aunt or Auntie Donna and I don’t actually know who they are, but work. More importantly, Ru arrived and proved Karen is part psychic, wheeling out ten gorgeous men with the queens needing to guess what animal the men are packing in their pouches. In any event, I want all ten of them and my basement is no longer just flooded, there is a tsunami and I’m sorry to all the things that will suffer water damage for the rest of their lives.
I’m not sure if anyone could actually be bothered counting, but Maxi took out victory.
And she didn’t just win a gift card, she also got to pair the queens with their makeover partners from the New Zealand Falcons aka the gay rubgy team of abbsolute zaddies. Again, all six can do whatever they want to me. Maxi first paired Karen with someone that looked pretty similar to her, which she also did for Elektra, Art, Kita and herself, leaving Scarlet with the biggest uphill battle. Though they could pass as a mother and daughter, I guess?
Kita quickly got to work charming her partner, while Scarlet’s partner was adorably excited to try drag for the first time. Karen’s partner had dabbled with his mum’s shoes, Art’s had worn lippy and Maxi quickly realised she had actually picked the biggest battle for herself, despite their resemblance. And oh God, please don’t let it be that storyline where the one that chooses the pairs goes home. Oh and Elektra and her newest family member need to start dating and open an Only Fans – see, I’m cool – because I love them. We then had a montage and while only Elektra’s zaddy could rock a heel, I think this proves rugby players are near perfection. Which, at this point, is all we should care about. Oh and we then learnt that Kita and Scarlet’s partners are dating and damn, why don’t they do an Only Fans while I’m suggesting businesses.
I guess I should talk about the challenge rather than my erotic fan-fiction, so Scarlet and Art were shady about queens not making outfits for their new family members. Though Scarlet felt Art’s custom outfit wasn’t very custom, so was including her in the shade.
Elimination Day rolled around, with Elektra’s daughter worried about having to share the limelight before Maxi finally got confirmation that she would be shaving off her sister’s beard and damn, when it went they’ve got the family resemblance on lock. Elektra and her daughter were bonding over their lives, with him sharing how as a Pacific Islander man he has been taught to try and present as straight and as such, this is so liberating for him to participate and firmly embrace all the colours of the rainbow. Swoon. Meanwhile Art was not sure that Kita was doing enough to take out a win, despite the fact Kita knows that she needs to step out and prove herself. And thankfully, her daughter is ready to take out the win for her.
Karen had half done her sister’s make-up when she realised that Art is only focusing on herself, rather than getting her sister prepped. Scarlet meanwhile was trying to learn her partner’s bone structure, while Elektra was finishing up and teaching her sister as she went. While Art continued to wait for her sister’s eyebrows to dry. Apparently.
Ru, Michelle and Rhys were riding solo for the mainstage runway presentation, with Kita and Feta Mean looking like a Cruella black and white delight as Feta lived her best life. Elektra Shock and ReRe Action were space-age stunning, Maxi Shield and Cilla Wet were dressed as jellyfish and well, it wasn’t great. Art and Craft Simone rocked Priscilla chic and were totally gorgeous, Scarlet and Sapphire were slutty, sexy showgirls but tragically didn’t do the wagon wheel watusi. Karen was joined by Debbie from reception and it was damn glorious.
Kita and Feta received universal praise for their makeover and the fact they gave all of the personality. Elektra meanwhile was read for filth by Michelle, but loved by Rhys. Maxi was praised for bringing the fun, though read for literally everything else. Art was read for the lack of family resemblance, despite them both looking absolutely stunning. Scarlet was praised for being cute, despite her clearly focusing on herself, rather than her sister. Though she got lucky by how damn charming Sapphire is. And despite them all hating the thick glasses, Karen and her sister were praised for the look while Ru wasn’t sure about how much of a transformation Karen produced.
Backstage the queens and their daughter/sisters/I can’t keep it consistent untucked, with Karen leading a toast to all the iconic rugby players. Art and her sister continued to be funny and charming, before Scarlet spun things around to who would be in the top and bottom. Everyone agreed Kita would be in the top, while Karen assumed she would be there with her and the rest would be in the bottom. Since Elektra was read for make-up, Maxi was read for lacking detail, Scarlet was read for being basic – lol – and Art for not bringing family resemblance.
Back on the runway, as if it were in any doubt, Kita took out her first, very well-earned victory of the competition, while Art and Karen were sent to safety. The bottom three nervously awaited their fates, before Scarlet’s track-record couldn’t even save her as she was forced to battle it out against Maxi, as Elektra was sent to safety. The. Gag.
Anyway, from the moment Kylie’s Better the Devil You Know started, Scarlet kicked straight into dancing diva mode, as Maxi stuck with her hilarious and charming approach. While Maxi lived her best life, Scarlet proceeded to strip and sell sex, which sadly proved to be enough as Maxi was robbed on her way out the door. Much to my bitter rage and disappointment.
I pulled Maxi as close to me as her breast plate would allow and hissed into her ear how wrong her elimination was and that she deserved to stay. But being the absolute delight, she had a quick chuckle, told me to calm my farm and get to work chatting. After I bequeath her a Maxi Shiely Temple, that is.
Maxi and I grew up in the ‘80s pubs, living our best lives on a cheeky pink lemonade and climbing trees set over tables while no adults supervised. It was a wonderful time to be Australian. Now that we’re adults, we like to add a bit of vodka to the mix but that doesn’t change the fact that these spiked Shirley Temples aren’t nostalgic AF.
Enjoy!
Maxi Shiely Temple Serves: 1.
Ingredients ice 1 tbsp grenadine 1-2 shots of vodka lemonade, to top maraschino cherries, to garnish
Method Fill the glass with ice. Top with grenadine, vodka and lemonade.
Stir. Add a maraschino cherry or two. And down. Like the damn icon herself.
Fame Hungry 