Host

Chris Rocky Road

Dessert, Snack, Sweets

Despite all of his pre-show panic and nerves, Chris is going to do such a great job hosting next weekend – he barely even needed me to tart up his script and makes the jokes punchier! He will perfectly balance the important political message of equality with humour and heart … but I’m giving too much away.

Chris and I have always had a very hands-on but not in the way you’d expect from me relationship, standing together during the good times and the bad and helping each other whenever the other is in a personal, professional or spiritual pickle.

I spent the early 90s enjoying life as part of his entourage at 30 Rock while he was on SNL – it was pre-Lorne’s ban – before encouraging him to focus on his fledgling movie career with such hits as the shockingly Oscar-snubbed Sgt. Bilko.

We were kept apart for a decade or so by geography with my many stints in rehab and prison, but that never lessened our bond and when catching-up it is always like no time has passed.

With important work to do finalising his script, I knew there was only one thing to do – make him his favourite Chris Rocky Road.

 

chris-rocky-road-1

 

As I rule, I grew up hating rocky road as jelly was foul and pink marshmallows confused me – I also thought it was spelt Rocklea Road and that angered me. I was, obviously, thrown into a fit of rage when once Chris requested some in the SNL writers room until he explained both the correct spelling and that pink marshmallows can just be binned.

With that I got to work combining all of our favourite things, peanut butter, pretzels and chocolate and the sweet, salty and ultimately glorious Chris Rocky Road was born.

Enjoy!

 

chris-rocky-road-2

 

Chris Rocky Road
Makes: 24 large chunks.

Ingredients
100g peanut butter chips
250g dark chocolate
150g milk chocolate
175g soft butter
60ml golden syrup
200g pretzels
150g peanuts
150g freeze-dried strawberries, roughly chopped
100g white marshmallows, chopped
icing sugar, for dusting

Method
Place peanut butter chips in the freezer.

Melt the dark and milk chocolate with the butter and syrup in a heavy bottomed saucepan over a low heat.

Place the pretzels in a freezer bag and bash them with a rolling pin to get a variety of sized pieces.

Empty into a large bowl with the peanuts, strawberries and marshmallows. Take the pan of the heat and mix the chocolate through to combine. Remove the peanut butter chips from the freezer and mix through.

Tip the mix into a lined square baking tray, smoothing it as much as possible. Place in the fridge until firm enough to set and cut, a couple of hours.

Place on a plate, dust with icing sugar and devour.

 

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Everybody hates Chris

Guess Who's Coming to Dinner

Much has been made of the annual #OscarsSoWhite campaign with many of my dear friends missing out on nominations, Will Smith not included – he broke my heart in the 80s when he ended our engagement knows what he did.

Thankfully the great Cheryl Boone Isaacs had the good sense to ignore the overwhelmingly privileged white, middle-aged men that dominate the membership (also, thanks for working to correct the imbalance, Chez) and hire my dear friend and confidante Chris Rock for this year’s hosting gig.

Chris and I first connected in New York in the 80s when we were both being mentored by Eddie Murphy. While I spent more time honing my suggestive outfits rather than my craft – I wanted Eddie to marry me, obviously – Chris was always destined to be a star.

With Chris busy prepping for his role hosting Hollywood’s night of nights, he gave me a buzz to come over and provide him with some much needed moral support (and assistance writing jokes).

What will give us energy to brainstorm while saying break a leg but not literally as it would be in poor taste for me to turn up impersonating you in blackface as a replacement host? Even I know that is not funny or appropriate!

Picture source: George Pimentel / WireImage.

 

As you can probably tell, we are very social but the fun isn’t only limited to celebrities! You can follow us on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, Tumblr and Google+.

Briocher Bünsberg

Baking, Side

While I miss, sorry, Osher’s beautiful 00s bouffant, he truly has aged like a fine wine.

As I mentioned, Osh and I first connected on the set of Australian Idol where, as you have come to expect, a torrid love affair began as he dabbled in some other areas of the sexuality spectrum. Alas, it did not last, but our close erotic bond blossomed into the beautiful friendship that has lasted the past decade.

Even when he was refusing to take me on the grounds of CBS while he was working with the dear Paula Abdul – I was the cat in Opposites Attract – as it was against the AVO Les Moonves had out against me, Oshie and I have never once fought.

Osh knew that I would be struggling with my rival pocket-gay Cunthony Callea returning to TV and was attentive as he was back during our romantic period. There were so many roses, candles and large, decorative cushions that you’d be forgiven for thinking that I was living in the Bitchelor Pad!

Don’t let the soothing, loved up atmosphere fool you – our catch-up was still firmly focused on aggressively bringing down the Callea and Geyer, to help Jo-Beth win and go on to host our planned reboot of Australia’s Funniest Home Videos.

All that scheming calls for something that will provide a lot of energy for a minimal amount of time, which is where my Briocher Bünsberg come into play.

 

briocher-bünsberg-1

 

Fluffy, sweet and full of not-so-complex carbohydrates, the buns provided us with just enough sustenance to scheme which being distracting.

Enjoy!

 

briocher-bünsberg-2

 

Briocher Bünsberg
Makes: 8 buns.

Ingredients
275g soft butter, diced
550g plain flour, plus extra for dusting
60g caster sugar
7g sachet dried yeast
90ml milk, heated slightly to 37°C(ish)
7 eggs
1 tbsp sesame seeds

Method
Combine the flour and caster sugar in a large bowl of a stand mixer with a dough hook.

Dissolve the yeast in the milk, and combine with the flour mixture along with 6 of the eggs. Mix at medium speed for roughly 15 minutes, until smooth and elastic. Add the butter, piece by piece, and mix until it’s totally incorporated into the dough.

Lightly oil a large bowl to turn the dough into and cover with a damp cloth and prove until doubled in size.

Preheat the oven to 180°C.

Knock back the dough, then using wet hands roll it into 6-8 balls. The dough is pretty sticky so if rolling the balls doesn’t work, stretch and tuck the dough back under itself. Place the buns on the prepared baking tray, leaving enough room in between to allow them to prove until they are doubled in size.

Lightly beat the remaining egg and brush over the dough, sprinkle with sesame seeds and bake for 20 for buns.

Remove from oven, cool and devour.

 

As you can probably tell, we are very social but the fun isn’t only limited to celebrities! You can follow us on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, Tumblr and Google+.

Idol worship

Guess Who's Coming to Dinner

As a promising singer in Australia during the early naughties, it goes without saying that I dipped my toe in the Australian Idol waters. While I was disqualified and edited out of the program for sending Mark Holden death threats for refusing to give me a touchdown after my rendition of Don’t Cry Out Loud, I developed a very close relationship with Andrew G.

Sorry Osher Günsberg.

With two of my music-scene nemeses / fellow Idol alums heading into the jungle for I’m Barely a Celebrity, I thought I should give Oshie a buzz to catch-up and hate-watch while plotting ways to turn the public against them and ensuring our dear little JB Taylor comes out victorious.

What can I serve to power our dastardly plotting?

Picture source: Channel V.

 

As you can probably tell, we are very social but the fun isn’t only limited to celebrities! You can follow us on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, Tumblr and Google+.

Cherry Deitz Pie

Dessert, Pie, Snack, Survivor: Cambodia - Second Chance, Sweets

OK guys, we have to start by saying this week’s episode was pretty tragic and was an absolutely horrible way for our dear friend Terry Deitz to leave the game.

A game he waited close to ten years to return for.

As you would’ve seen, Probst woke up Deitz with any sane person’s dream line “hey, it’s me Probst” (albeit clothed and not looking for intimacy), to advise Terry that his son was in hospital needing a heart transplant. While the story has a happy ending, in that his son has had a successful transplant and is doing well, the agony that Terry must have been feeling during his journey home was something we knew that even our cooking could not fix.

With that in mind, we got out our time machine and whipped up the pie before the season started and swore Tez to secrecy with the lie that production wanted him well fed and to succeed. Being kind and naive enough to ignore the historical proof of our duplicitous behaviour, he bought it.

We’ve known Terry a long time, having met while he was in the Navy, after Annelie and I decided during a bender that we needed to find ourselves strapping men in uniform. While I took the term ‘in the navy’ too literally for general liking, Terry saw us for the lost kids that we were and helped us become the people we are today.

Just imagine how much worse we could have been.

As Survivor’s Captain America, there was no other option than our Cherry Deitz Pie for his pre-game, retconned boot party. Between the tragic way his Second Chance came to an end and Varner just being amazing, we can expect Third Chance pretty soon, right?

 

Cherry Deitz Pie_1

 

The tartness of the cherry and acid of the lemon work together to make a pie is sharp and sweet all at once. The irony being, you can’t stop at one piece.

Join us tomorrow when we hang with our friend (who became our nemesis and then friend again) and latest boot, Woo – enjoy!

 

Cherry Deitz Pie_2

 

Cherry Deitz Pie
Serves: 8-10.

Ingredients
2 ½ cups plain flour, plus extra for rolling out the dough
1 tsp salt
1 tsp sugar
225g cold unsalted butter, diced
½ cup ice water
1kg cherries, pitted and halved
½ cup raw caster sugar
2 tbsp tapioca flour
2 tbsp fresh lemon juice
1 large egg, beaten
1 tbsp raw sugar

Method
Combine flour, salt, and sugar in a large bowl. Add butter and using your fingers, rub the butter with the flour until it resembles breadcrumbs/wet sand.

Add in half the cold water and combine; you want the dough to be crumbly aka short but to hold together when squeezed. If it is still dry, add water a few tablespoons at a time until it reaches the right consistency.

Split the dough in half and form into roughly 2cm discs. Wrap in cling wrap and refrigerate for about an hour. Preheat oven to 190°C.

On a floured bench, roll out a disc of dough (leave the second one in the fridge) under non-stick paper until about 3mm thick. Carefully place the dough into a 22cm pie dish, fitting into the bottom and sides without stretching the dough. Trim the dough, leaving about a 3cm overhang and place in the fridge while you prepare the filling.

Combine cherries, caster sugar, tapioca flour and lemon juice in a large bowl, stirring to coat the cherries. Remove the dish from the oven and fill with the cherry mixture.

Take the remaining disc of dough out of the fridge and repeat the rolling out process. When done, slice into long, 3cm wide strips. Carefully weave the strips over the filling to form a lattice (like with the Fiona Apple Pie), leaving about a centimetre of overhang at each end. Fold the edge of the pie over the ends of the lattice and crimp with a fork around the edge, discarding any excess pastry.

Brush the top with beaten egg and sprinkle with the raw sugar. Bake for about an hour until the pastry is crisp and golden and the filling is bubbling, reducing the heat until 160°C after about 40 minutes.

Remove from oven and allow to cool for a few hours before devouring.

 

As you can probably tell, we are very social but the fun isn’t only limited to celebrities! You can follow us on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, Tumblr and Google+.

Dulce de Nick Lachey

Condiment, Dip, Sauce, Sweets

Remember in 2003 when Annelie and I took the world by storm as co-stars in the critically acclaimed reality series Newlyweds: Nick and Jessica?

Oh that’s right, we were edited out by the vengeful and aggressive Jessica Simpson for feeding her some of her most iconic lines to make her look stupid and undermine the legitimacy of the marriage (she actually has a PHD from Oxford and Annelie was trying to annul their marriage to get Nick all to herself, girl loves a boyband and the other Nick escaped from her basement).

While we have been embroiled in a private war with Jessica for the last decade (it has escalated to the point where she threw acid at Ben when they bumped into each other at Pump last year), our friendship with Nick and his dear, beautiful and superior second wife Vanessa couldn’t be stronger.

Nicky and Vanny were in town hoping to brainstorm ideas for a new reality format about finding the next 98 degrees, titled 39°C: So hot you’ve got a fever. It is essentially like every other reality show except it has likeable people with questionable talent.

We were so excited about our brilliant idea /  next venture, that I quickly whipped up a batch of our Dulce de Nick Lachey, which you just know was invented as a body caramel.

 

Dulce de Nick Lachey_1

 

This is literally the easiest thing in the world to make and instantly makes everything in your life better.

Enjoy!

 

Dulce de Nick Lachey_2

 

Dulce de Nick Lachey
Makes: 2 cups.

Ingredients
2 x 395g cans sweetened condensed milk

Method
Preheat oven to 220°C.

Place the condensed milk in a small baking dish and cover with a sheet of baking paper, pressing it directly on top of the condensed milk. Cover tightly with foil and place inside a large, deep baking tray so you can make a water bath. Fill the larger tray with boiling water, two-thirds up the side of the dish.

Cook for 1 ½  hours or until gold in colour. Pour the caramel into a large bowl and whisk until smooth.

Make sure you keep an eye on the water while it is cooking. If it dries out the caramel will burn and then, obviously, be ruined.

 

As you can probably tell, we are very social but the fun isn’t only limited to celebrities! You can follow us on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, Tumblr and Google+.

Jeff Rib Probst and Elisabeth Hasselbeck Potatoes

12 Days of Survivor Christmas, Main, Side

It’s been an exhausting 10 days, with many of our closest survivor pals dropping by for a Christmas catch-up. With every cookie, pie and fancy dessert, there was always one thing in the back of our minds – Probst.

Probst. Came. Today, dear reader, was finally the day.

As you would probably be aware, our relationship with Jeff Dreamy-McDreamy-Free-Pass-Eternal-Object-Of-Our-Affection Probst has been tumultuous, so he insisted on bringing a friend to dinner (likely to deter us from making him our prisoner/Misery-esque lover). Luckily, his guest of choice was the delightful Elisabeth Hasselbeck, the Survivor: The Australian Outback contestant that has the dubious honor of being the first contestant to be worldwide spank bank material/the second America’s Sweetheart (we still love you too Col).

Lis has been keen to catch up ever since she hit it off with Ben on the set of The View. After Jazz in Your Face’s resounding success on the Ellen Show, Ben was looking for further opportunities for the troupe while Annelie continued with plans to thwart future Elijah Wood movies and subsequently save mankind from further suffering.

Long story short, Ben provided a short, naked dance intermission during a heated conversation between Rosie O’Donnell and Lis. Ben’s interpretative and confronting (literally) interlude got Lis’s attention and lifelong friendship and scared Rosie from ever returning…for a while (the whole Iraq issue was a farce).

How else to make the love of our lives and his equally amazing date feel welcome?

Indeed, the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach. However, the way to a man becoming your eternal (likely unwilling) love slave is through meat sweats and a food coma so terrible they lose the will to fight back. So, big meaty roast it was!

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The Jeff Rib Probst pulls out all the stops and is destined for special occasions only. Accompanied with crunchy, fluffy Lis Hasselbeck potatoes, this is a meal certain to impress.

Make sure you have plenty of cold ones on hand to wash down this deliciously meaty edible utopia!

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Jeff Rib Probst and Lis Hasselbeck Potatoes
Serves: 8.

Ingredients
2kg approx. beef prime rib roast (allow one rib per two people)
8 tablespoons olive oil, divided
3 cloves garlic, finely sliced
12 medium size desiree potatoes
1 teaspoon caraway seeds
Salt and pepper, to taste

Method
Preheat oven to 220 degrees. Using a small paring knife, make small slits in the top of the prime rib (ribs facing down) and insert slices of garlic. Rub with four tablespoons of olive oil and season with salt and pepper. Roast for 20 minutes in a cast iron roasting tray.
Meanwhile, wash and peel the potatoes. Using a sharp knife, halve potatoes and then cut fine slits, leaving 1cm at bottom of potato half to ensure potato stays together.
Once beef has cooked for 20 minutes, add potatoes to roasting tray and drizzle with extra 4 tablespoons olive oil, salt and pepper. Roast meat and potatoes for another hour for rare beef, or until cooked to your liking. Allow meat to stand for at least 20 minutes, while potatoes finish cooking through.
To serve, sprinkle potatoes with caraway seeds and arrange around the roast on a large platter. Serve with cherry gravy or other delicious seasonal sauces!

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Happy Christmas from the Fame Hungry team and all our celebrity besties!

A Wilde week ahead

Guess Who's Coming to Dinner

I think we are at the point where we need to stop being shocked that our celebrity friends want to catch-up with us; this is now a thing and you will get to hear about our fantastic, high-flying lives as celebrity-bloggers/famous friends/founders of esteemed dance troupe Jazz in Your Face.

Stephen gave us a buzz over the weekend hoping to catch-up while on a quick winter jaunt down to the stifling heat of Brisbane to see if it was as ugly as Alain de Botton said (it kind of is, but he can decide for himself) and reconnect with his old friends.

Annelie and I have known Stephen for many years, after getting a job hanging clothes in the QI wardrobe department after we were run out of Hollywood for our varied crimes and misdemeanours. After sabotaging the QI stylist, we were promoted to the role and became confidantes to Stephen however we lost contact after our deportation following arrests for storming the set of Harry Potter and demanding roles.

What says sorry that you got stuck with a sub-par stylist on QI when we disappeared without a trace following our clandestine deportation?

Picture source: Stephen Fry.com.

WatermEllen DeGeneres Salad

Side

It is so nice of Ellen to make her second trip down-under for the sole purpose of catching up with us and clearing the air after the furore we created for her show.

She hasn’t changed a bit since that first time we met; so eager to embrace and foster new talent and give them a platform to succeed, while still being friendly and down to earth. She was literally flyin’ solo for the visit (she promised Portia would drop by soon…Annelie played the dancing baby opposite her in Ally McBeal), as she had guests she was hoping to secure in Australia.

Knowing she was out on business, we quickly threw together a WatermEllen DeGeneres Salad to counteract the recent heat-wave and provide Ellen with refreshing sustenance for her important duties.

 

Watermellen Salad 2

 

There is something about watermelon, feta and olives that is inherently satisfying and indulgent and when you add fresh mint and the lime cured onion, you are left with the perfect combination of (almost)summer flavours.

 

Watermellen Salad 3

 

We quickly ate our meal, mindful of Ellen’s official duties, before she dropped the biggest news of the catch-up (no, they are still not having a baby)…she wants to have us on her show again! This time as socialite-celebrity cooks, rather than as the classically trained contemporary dance troupe, Jazz in Your Face.

Our people are still talking, but stay tuned for our return appearance.

In the meantime, enjoy!

WatermEllen DeGeneres Salad
Ingredients
½ watermelon
200g feta
1 small red onion, thinly sliced
1 small bunch of mint, leaves roughly chopped
½ cup pitted kalamata olives, sliced
1 lime
olive oil
salt and pepper, to season

Method
In small bowl, combine sliced red onion with the juice of the lime to slightly cure.

Dice watermelon and feta into similar sized cubes (I went with roughly 1.5cm dice), and place in a large bowl with the sliced olives and a generous handful of mint.

Pour cured onion and juice into bowl with a good lug of oil. Toss (the salad) and season to taste.

Let’s have a little fun, this week

Guess Who's Coming to Dinner

What a blast from the past it was to hear from Ellen today!

Annelie and I first met Ellen when she was taking a lunch break during the recording of her role in Finding Nemo. We had just failed our auditions for Nemo and the flock of seagulls respectively, so decided it best to focus on our dance troupe Jazz in your Face; Ellen spotted us in the car-park and was impressed by our impromptu performance.

Having only been witness to half of Jazz in your Face’s dance majesty, Ellen kindly invited us to perform on her then-upcoming talk show. The routine lead to a record breaking number of complaints for inappropriate behaviour and thousands of dollars in fines for Ellen.

What says sorry we cost you so much money and nearly ruined your reputation as a talk-show host…and risked you being thrown off air in your first season?

Picture source: ABC News.