Roasted Chickpeter Dinklage

Pete is just such a delightful, delightful man.

As I mentioned earlier, Annelie and I caused a major scene on the Game of Thrones set during season one which had a highly negative impact on Dinkie’s relationship with the rest of the cast.

The incident? Obviously Annelie and I were both competing to mother Khal Drogo’s dragon, found out about the other’s advances and had an epic Dynasty style fight that would go on to inspire Viserys’ death scene. Let’s just say, I now wear a wig.

Anyway, Dinkie had vouched for us to get us the job and tried to stop us during the altercation, resulting in the premature beheading of our dear friend Dead Stark. He was painfully hurt by our indiscretion and vowed that the Master of Coin would never talk to the Masters of Bate again.

It was tragic, but we deserved it.

Thankfully, fate knew that our friendship was too important and intervened when I ran into Dinkie at Clement Clarke Moore Park in Chelsea. Impressed by my niece’s charm and the fact that I was, for some reason, trusted to keep a two-year-old alive, he reached out and extended his forgiveness and renewed friendship.

We spent the last festive season wandering the High Line, brunching at the Standard and (much to his chagrin) heckling commoners from the top of the Flatiron Building – the only thing missing, was Annelie.

Wanting to make up for missing out, Dinkie requested that our catch-up be absolutely perfect, which to us means plenty of booze and a batch of Roasted Chickpeter Dinklage.

Roasted chickpeas are super simple and can pretty much be seasoned with anything (lemon, pepper and Parmesan is pretty delicious) so play around until you get the taste you want. Obviously we went for something spicy, like you would expect in King’s Landing.

Enjoy!

Roasted Chickpeter Dinklage
Serves: 4.

Ingredients
400g can chickpeas
1 tbsp olive oil
1 tsp sriracha sauce
½ tsp honey
dash cumin
salt and pepper, to taste

Method
Preheat oven to 200°C.

Drain the chickpeas and rinse thoroughly for a minute to clean off the beans. Drain off the extra water and pour out onto a tray lined with paper towel and dry, again, thoroughly. Discard any skins and paper towels and lay the chickpeas back out over the tray.

Drizzle the olive oil, sriracha, honey and spices over the chickpeas and use your hands to coat.

Roast for 30-40 minutes until the beans are golden and crunchy, keeping an eye on them to avoid burning.

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Nicki Spinaj and Cheese Triangles

Main, Party Food, Side, Snack

Like us, our close friend Nicki was always destined for fame and I would argue, that is what first drew us together at the anger management facility.

While we have a strong friendship with Nickers’, based on trust, respect and non-physical rage, there have been notable feuds in our past. I mean, who can tolerate Sophia-Grace and Woesie. Eye-roll emoji.

Despite questionable taste in hangers-on like them, I guess we are proof that sometimes they can turn out alright, and knowing that, always helps bring us back together.

After leaving the facility – thanks to Nickers’ glowing recommendation – we convinced her that her talents were wasted helping people and that she needed to do something truly meaningful like rapping and feuding with Mariah.

(The only good thing Mariah can do is a Christmas album, let’s be honest).

Nek minute, Nicki was flying high like a starship and became a global sensation with us by her side to help her scheme, feud and throw some glorious side eye. Fun fact, the what’s good phrase is Annelie’s go to throwdown line if I eat the last piece of cake.

Such a spicy, exciting bond can only be summed up by one thing – our Nicki Spinaj and Cheese triangles.

Cheese is literally the best thing to ever happen to the planet (aside from us and wine) and well, any receptacle that helps get hot, gooey cheese from a plate to my mouth is a win. Throw in the freshness of spinach and dill and you’ve got a heavenly, creamy-sharp orgy happening in your mouth.

Enjoy!

Nicki Spinaj and Cheese Triangles
Makes: 24.

Ingredients
375g frozen spinach, thawed
125g Greek feta, crumbled
125g ricotta, crumbled
1 tablespoon dill, chopped
2 eggs, lightly beaten
salt and pepper, to taste
375g pack filo pastry
oil, for brushing

Method
Preheat oven to 180°C.

Drain all of liquid from the spinach and mix in a medium bowl with the feta, ricotta, dill, eggs, salt and pepper, until combined.

Brush oil between three layers of pastry and place on top of each other. Cut pastry into three long strips.

Place about a tablespoon of the mixture in a corner of each strip. Fold diagonally to form a triangle and then repeat with remaining filo and spinach mixture until all used up.

Place parcels (join-side down) on a baking tray and brush with oil, and bake for 15 to 18 minutes until crisp.

Serve with sweet chili, a spicy tomato sauce or aioli. Or by themselves.

As you can probably tell, we are very social but the fun isn’t only limited to celebrities! You can follow us on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, Tumblr and Google+.

Kelly Piglesworth In Blankets

Main, Party Food, Side, Snack, Survivor: Cambodia - Second Chance

Kelly, Kelly, Kelly – we barely knew thee!

While Kelly Wiglesworth was the poster-child for the concept of the entire Second Chances season, it has widely been noted that after the first episode she disappeared – ladies and gentlemen that is because, we are 63% sure, she did.

You see, being out on location we were privy to a lot of behind the scenes content and rumours and there were definitely times when it appeared Wiggity was replaced by a hologram or a cardboard cut-out, so that she could practice yoga and avoid fielding Probsty’s questions.

We first met our dear friend Wiggity in Mexico, when we were at an exclusive health retreat (aka rehab). Wigs was the Rafting Activities Director of the retreat and fell for us because opposites attract (she loved our animated stair dancing too).

She was living far of the grid at the time, and still is, but found our passion for technological interconnectedness intriguing, arousing and mildly terrifying – our passionate devotion to her as the first, first-loser of Survivor probably helped the bond a little too.

Despite having what felt like one confessional during the entire nine episodes, Kelly will always be a star to us … despite forming a very close bond with our future lover, Joe. As an aside, how glorious was Joe’s shower scene?

Anyway, we were thrilled she was away from our man, but sad that once again she failed to join the winner’s circle – thankfully we had our Kelly Piglesworth in Blankets to cheer us up (slash soak up the alcohol from Kass and Savage’s continuing bender)

We’ve always been honest about our love of trashy, tasty food and our Piglesworth in Blankets definitely fit the bill – pillowy, cheesy dough, hugging a sausage? Delicious. Not dignified, but delicious.

It makes me miss Joe …

Enjoy!

Kelly Piglesworth in Blankets
Makes: 48 … which is enough for one disinterested castaway who got their torch snuffed for the first time after 15 years on the bench and two boozey co-jurors that are falling in love.

Ingredients
2 ½ cups plain flour
5 tsp baking powder
1 heaped tsp salt
2 tbsp grated Parmesan
1 cup milk
1 egg
3 tablespoons olive oil
48 pork chipolatas
1 egg whisked with a dash of milk, to glaze

Method
Preheat the oven to 200°C.

Place 2 cups of flour in a bowl with the salt and parmesan, combining with a fork. Beat the milk, egg and oil to combine and add to the dry ingredients, mixing as you go. Trust your gut, if the dough seems dry, add more milk, too wet, add more flour.

Split the dough into two pieces. Roll one on a lightly floured surface to make a 5mm thick rectangle. Cut the dough into 5cm-ish strips and then each strip into 7cm(again ish) lengths.

Working a chipolata at a time, wrap the dough around the sausage, squeezing the overlap together to complete the sausage-snuggie and place on a lined baking sheet. Repeat the process until the dough is gone, roll out the second sheet of dough, slice it up and repeat the wrapping.

You’ll probably need two large baking sheets.

Using a pastry brush, glaze the dough; place them in the oven and bake for 12 to 15 minutes.

Remove from the oven, leave to cool for ten/fifteen minutes and then devour … preferably with wine, Kass, Savage and a cut-out/hologram of Wiggy.

As you can probably tell, we are very social but the fun isn’t only limited to celebrities! You can follow us on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, Tumblr and Google+.

(Oh and hi Reddit, we love you – particularly /u/Shuberto, this is for you)

Kass McChickllen

Main, Party Food, Survivor: Cambodia - Second Chance

Oy vey – why oh why did we have to lose our dear, sweet Chaos Kass?

We’ve been friends with the breakout Cagayan star slash villain turned Second Chances hero since our old law school days. Kass was a shy, retiring type in college so we took her under our wings and became her unwanted life coaches.

While our advice generally resulted in lawsuits against her rather, she remembered we were Survivor super fans when she was cast in Cagayan and re-enlisted our services due to our cut-throat, callous and heavily deranged behaviour where we coached her to third place.

We would have gotten her the win (using a combination of bribes and sexual favours on our part), if it wasn’t for that meddling kid, our (now) friend, Woo.

Kass came into Cambodia with arguably the biggest target on her back but was able to woo (no pun intended) people to her side with her truly kind and loving nature – thankfully she avoided tribal for such a long time that she was able to connect with everyone!

As usual, the merge episode was complete and utter bedlam with alliances shifting and people trying to find their place to secure their path to the final tribal however this season instead of targeting the biggest, physical threats the two smallest women were the targets.

Obviously because they were the two smartest players left. Oh and I’m guessing that has something to do with the fact that Spencer desperately wants to swing with Joe? I don’t usually like Spencer, however I have to admire his exquisite taste in men – and I mean, the thirst is real, so why would anyone target our current bae?

So while Kind/Kumbaya/Kalm Kass made her exit to Ponderosa, she was buoyed by the fact that she was able improve upon her placement from her last season to become the Queen of the Jury, rather than the last loser on the jury. You just know that called for a jubilantly, sorrowful Kass McChickllen.

This is may come as a shock to you, but this recipe is an homage to the famous burger from our friend Bozo the Bush and his Golden Arches … and a pretty good one at that.

Spicy, sweet, lovely and a little bit naughty this is everything our dear Kass brings to the game and more – thankfully we get to enjoy her for the rest of the season, giving Eliza Orlins sass from the loser’s bench. We can dream, right?

While we are dreaming, can we have Third time’s the Charm greenlit yet? You can even just send this cast back out again, I don’t mind!

Enjoy!

Kass McChickllen
Serves: 4

Ingredients
500g chicken mince
1 egg
1 cup water
1 cup plain flour
2 tsp salt
1 tsp onion powder
¼ tsp ground black pepper
⅛ tsp garlic powder
4 sesame seed hamburger buns
iceberg lettuce, chopped
vegetable oil, for “shallow” frying

Sauce
60ml mayonnaise
⅛ tsp onion powder

Method
Place the chicken mince in a large bowl and season generously with salt and pepper. Divide into four patties and place in the fridge to set for at least an hour. While you’re refrigerating things, combine the sauce ingredients and refrigerate until needed.

Beat the egg and stir with the water in a large, shallow bowl and combine the flour, salt, pepper, onion powder and garlic powder in a second bowl.

Grab the patties out of the fridge and coat each with the flour mixture, remove and dredge each filet in the egg mixture, before coating in the flour mix again. Place in a freezer bag and freeze for an hour.

Remove and repeat the flour and dredging process again and leave to rest for about ten minutes.

Heat a generous lug of oil in a large frying pan, I mean crazy generous but not enough to technically consider it shallow frying as you know it scares me. Cook the patties for about 5-6 minutes per side, or until light brown and crispy. As the chicken is frying, toast the buns in a second, smaller frying pan.

To build the burgers, coat each side of the bun with some of the special (but not that … or indeed that, special) sauce, whack a good handful of lettuce on the base of the bun and top with the hot pattie.

Devour and be thankful that Kass is still with us on TV.

As you can probably tell, we are very social but the fun isn’t only limited to celebrities! You can follow us on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, Tumblr and Google+.

Bruce Springsteen Roll

Main, Party Food, Snack

There is nothing quite as joyous and beautiful as catching up with your best friend; while it has been about five years since we last saw Brucey, it felt like no time had passed at all!

After meeting Bruce aka Brucey, Steeny, Springo or pal, in school our bond seemed unbreakable, with he and Annelie touring the bar circuit of New Jersey while I did everything in my power to bring down their rivals via torrid affairs.

While I was successful in ruining many a career on the way to Bruce’s success (without Bruce knowing, he enjoyed competition), our relationship hit a rough patch in 1984 when he invited (then) two-bit floozy Courteney Cox (we are friends, now) up on stage during his film-clip for Dancing in the Dark.

As you would expect, I ran straight to the tabloids to punish him for this indiscretion resulting in an eight-year feud and a string of voodoo and/or arson attempts near the Jersey shorelines.

Wanting to make amends after a stint in rehab, as well as the completion of a court-ordered anger management course, I reached out to Bruce and once again became his muse … eventually leading to an Academy Award for the song The Streets of Philadelphia.

We pulled up to the airport to pick-up Bruce to see him standing out front looking all dreamy, like the cover of Born on the USA – I mean, we would have taken him home and fought to the death for him, even if he wasn’t our friend.

I don’t know what it is about reminiscing about school, but it is something that definitely needs liquor, which in turns means you need drinking snacks at the ready – obviously our delicious Bruce Springsteen Rolls made the menu!

These little snacks pack the right amount of sweetness and spice and are the perfect accompaniment for an afternoon of being serenaded by your close friend over a beer.

Enjoy!

Bruce Springsteen Roll
Serves: 50.

Ingredients
1 tbsp soy sauce
1 tsp sake
2 tbsp oyster sauce
freshly ground black pepper
1 tsp cornflour
2 tbsp cooking oil, aka anything with a low smoke-point
2 cloves garlic, finely minced
1 tsp grated fresh ginger
3 shallots, finely sliced
2 carrots, grated
½ head of chinese cabbage, shredded
1 red chilli, finely sliced
100g shitake mushrooms, finely sliced
500g chicken mince
50g vermicelli noodles, soaked in water and drained
3 tbsp toasted peanuts, crushed
1 tbsp five spice powder
50 spring roll wrappers, defrosted
extra cooking oil, for brushing

Method
Combine the soy, sake, oyster sauce, pepper and the teaspoon of cornflour in a measuring jug; leave aside.

Heat a large pan over high heat, adding in the oil and swirling when hot. Quickly add the shallots, garlic and ginger and toss for 30 seconds, taking care not to burn them. Stirring well, add in the carrots, cabbage, chilli and mushroom, before reducing the heat to medium-high. Stir fry the vegetables for 2 minutes, or until the carrots have softened.

Remove cooked vegetables to a dish and add the chicken mince to the pan, breaking up the meat as you brown it. When the chicken is done, add the soy liquid, noodles and vegetables to the pan and combine. Remove from heat and allow to cool. When cooled, drain out any liquid.

Preheat oven to 180C and line two baking sheets.

Open the packet of spring roll wrappers, covering with a just damp towel to prevent drying out. Pour some cold water into a glass for brushing.

Place a wrapper out on the bench, add a tablespoon of the mixture in the middle at one end in a cigar shape. Roll wrapper over to cover the filling, fold both sides in and roll the spring roll up (this video has another wrapping technique, if I make no sense). Brush with water and place on baking sheet, covering with another just damp cloth.

Repeat the process until you run out of wrappers or filling.

Once done, remove the cloth, brush all of the rolls with oil and bake for 15-20 minutes, or until golden and crisp.

Devour with your favourite condiment, trying to avoid flinging sriracha all over your kitchen when shaking the bottle. Unless these are for a Halloween party in which case, boom, instant bloodbath decoration!

As you can probably tell, we are very social but the fun isn’t only limited to celebrities! You can follow us on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, Tumblr and Google+.

Amy Poehlenta Chips

Party Food, Side, Snack, Treat Yo' Self Week

While she may have never participated in the joy and wonder of treat yo’ self day on screen (I would argue Leslie felt her life was a treat anyway), we could look no further than Parks star, Emmy Award snubee, victim of our stalking (rewritten thanks to time travel) and co-best person in the world, Amy Poehler, to finish off Treat Yo’ Self Week.

We have documented our long struggles with trying to secure Ames’ friendship; when stalking / catfishing as Hollywood heavyweight Anneljamin Juddailes via Adam Scott didn’t work, we opted to rewrite history and join her BFF (now one of her BFFs) Teens at the Delaware County Summer Showtime.

After connecting with Ames via Teens at Second City (our nefarious plot worked), we immediately became best friends and have been living the good life with the Queens of Comedy ever since! Oh, you can bet your bottom dollar that we were heavily involved in the successful reshaping of Leslie Knope, all of Amy’s Award Show gags and generally controlling her life like a Momager – she is Kim to our Kris!

While Amy was present for our ugliness with Lorne Michaels and the subsequent lifetime ban at 30 Rock, she was kind enough to base Parks out of L.A. so we could still be involved in her life and members of her entourage. Who else is going to beat the shit out of Edie “Mrs. Soprano” Falco when she crosses her? Exactly.

Ames’ is on a break from filming and between press circuits for the world’s saddest, most soul crushing movie Inside Out and the upcoming Oscar winning, box-office breaking hit Sisters so dropped by to relax and treat herself to our glorious Amy Poehlenta Chips.

Between the sharp cheese, the whack of herbs and the hint of chilli, I have nothing to say other than the fact these are just as glorious as their namesake – love you Ames!

Amy Poehlenta Chip? Treat yo’ self. Treat yo’ self, indeed!

Amy Poehlenta Chips
Serves: 6

Ingredients
2 cups chicken stock
1 cup instant polenta
1 cup parmesan, grated
25g butter
½ cup rosemary leaves, chopped
sea salt and cracked black pepper
200g ricotta
2 tbsp chilli flakes
olive oil
1 tbsp sea salt flakes
1 tbsp sage, chopped

Method
Place the stock in a large saucepan and bring to the boil over medium heat.

Reduce heat to low and while whisking, gradually add the polenta – continuing for a couple of minutes before removing from the heat.

Throw in the parmesan, butter, rosemary and season with salt and pepper, generously with the pepper, and give a good stir. Cover with cling and leave to cool for 15-20 minutes.

Once cooled, fold through the ricotta and place the cheesy, polenta-y goodness in a lined small (20cm-ish) square cake tin and refrigerate until set, about six hours.

Preheat oven to 180C.

Remove the baking paper, and obviously the polenta with it, and slice into 2cm square matchsticks. Layer the chips on a lined baking sheet, drizzled with olive oil and bake for 50-20 minutes, or until golden and crisp.

While the chips are baking, combine the sage and salt. When the chips are done, allow the cool for 5 minutes before coating in the sage salt and devouring. Preferably with some Coolaioli.

You know Amy would like that.

As you can probably tell, we are very social but the fun isn’t only limited to celebrities! You can follow us on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, Tumblr and Google+.

Chicken & Jamie LeeKurtis Pies

Main, Party Food, Snack

After scaring us half to death with the prospect of a private, confidential catch-up, Jamie was on her best behaviour when she dropped by and she was proud of it.

We have been friends with Jamie since our childhood when I appeared as Kyle Richard’s stunt double in Halloween and Annelie was directing films under the pseudonym of John Carpenter.

Given the basis of our first meeting, scaring and pranks formed the basis of our relationship.

While we have occasionally gone too far, what with the anthrax incident and the time we had her quarantined for Ebola, we’ve only had one serious fight after I was arrested for stalking her godson. I mean, the whole ugliness could have been avoided had she just consented to introducing us/allowing us to trap him in our home.

Despite this setback, we have always enjoyed a close working relationship with Jamie; getting her jobs on Roadgames, My Girl and the critically acclaimed Beverly Hills Chihuahua (although sadly, we couldn’t negotiate for her to keep her role in the sequels) and she keeps us with a bountiful supply of yoghurt and patented diapers.

James was in fine spirits, and surprisingly a shirt, when she dropped over, gushing over her upcoming role in Scream Queens (we know who the killer is, but obvs can’t say anything … other than the fact Billie Lourd is a saint, but look at her mother/grandmother) and how Jake was willing to meet up for mediation.

A return to fame for us and look who comes crawling back!

Wanting to focus on the boozing while she was here, we opted for a generous batch of our famous Chicken & Jamie LeeKurtis Pies.

Decidedly low on yoghurt content, these pies still keep you feeling regular. Obviously “regular” for you needs to mean happy and content with a stomach filled with love.

Enjoy! Also, fun fact, don’t use the line “a stomach filled with love” if you’re on trial for stalking.

Chicken & Jamie LeeKurtis Pies
Serves: 36.

Ingredients
¾ cup chicken stock
½ cup dry white wine
500g chicken breast, diced
20g butter
1 leek, chopped finely
1 stick celery, chopped finely
1 tbsp plain flour
2 tsp fresh thyme leaves
½ cup cream
1 tsp Dijon mustard
salt and freshly ground black pepper
4 sheets shortcrust pastry
4 sheets butter puff pastry
1 egg yolk, beaten lightly
extra thyme leaves

Method
Melt butter in the pan and brown diced chicken for 1-2 minutes. Add the leek and celery and cook, stirring, until soft.

Stir in thyme and flour until bubbling. Add white wine, stirring to combine until slightly thickened before adding the stock, cream and mustard, until mixture boils and thickens. Season to taste with salt and black pepper and remove from heat, cool slightly.

Preheat the oven to 200°C. Grease 3 x 12-hole muffin tins. Cut 36 squares from the shortcrust pastry. Press into prepared pans. Spoon 1 tablespoon of chicken mixture into each pastry case. Cut 36 squares from the puff pastry. Top chicken mixture with the pastry lids, brush with egg yolk and sprinkle with extra thyme leaves.

Bake on the lowest shelf for 15 minutes or until browned.

As you can probably tell, we are very social but the fun isn’t only limited to celebrities! You can follow us on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, Tumblr and Google+.

Sweet Potaylor Swift Skins

Americana Week, Party Food, Side, Snack

We thought it best to start off Americana Week by dropping in with one of our closest all-American friends and who is more red…white and blue than dear Taylor Swift?

Like many of our relationships, we started off as Tay’s staunchest of enemies following an altercation at Chateau Marmont in the mid-00s.

We were all young when we first saw her, I close my eyes and the flashbacks start…we were living in Beverly Hills with Lisa Vanderpump at the time and were trying to grift Lindsay Lohan, who was staying at the Chateau when TayTay and her entourage stopped us in our tracks and defended Linds.

While it used to be bad blood between us (these songs were both written about us), the three of us now have nothing but mad love for one another after T-Swiz accepted our baked apology during one of our 12-step programs.

Little known fact, but we are actually the ones that got Tay and our Hollywood friends first hooked on baking!

We made a beeline for Taylor’s Beverly Hills cottage as soon as we landed and were greeted by a batch of cookies and freshly squeezed OJ. It goes without saying, but Ms Swift is a delightful, saint.

We spent the morning baking it (our jetlag) off, gossiping about what has been happening in Hollywood since we left (other than Jaime King erroneously snubbing Annelie and I for a co-Godparent role with Taylor) and how hilarious it is that people don’t know we went back in time to choreograph the aerobics video to Shake It Off as a laugh.

Our wider circle of friends dropped by for an early 4th of July party and at Tay’s request we whipped up a batch of our universally lauded Sweet Potaylor Swift Skins.

Regular potato skins are good, but if you want to really make them sing like Taylor, you’ve got to use sweet potato. The rich, sweetness is cut by sharp cheddar and a kick of chilli leaving a party in your mouth to which everyone is invited. Unlike our celebrity soirees.

Lucky we let you read about them!

Also guys, as we are so social and so technologically advanced we have gone nuts on the social medias. You should follow us on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, Tumblr and Google+.

Friendster, FriendFace, Myspace and YouFace coming soon.

Sweet Potaylor Swift Skins
Serves: 8.

Ingredients
2-4 large sweet potatoes
6 rashers streaky bacon, diced
1 cup vintage cheddar, grated
4 shallots, finely sliced
hot sauce, to taste
pinch smoked paprika
chives, for serving
sour cream, for serving

Method
Preheat oven to 180°C. Thoroughly wash sweet potatoes and bake for 45 minutes to 1 hour, or until tender. Allow sweet potatoes to cool (leaving oven on).

Cook bacon in a small fry-pan for 5 minutes, or until crisp. Remove from heat.

Cut sweet potatoes into quarters, ensuring skin remains intact. Scoop out flesh, leaving roughly a 5mm layer of potato. If your potatoes are huge, cut them into smaller strips (like in the pictures) Place skins onto a baking tray, flesh-side down and bake for 5 minutes, or until golden. Turn over and bake for a further 5 minutes.

Sprinkle bacon, shallots and a dash of hot sauce into skins. Top with cheese and bake for 10-15 minutes, or until cheese is melted and golden.

Serve with sour cream , finely slice chives and a sprinkle of smoked paprika.

Cobert Downey Jr.

Party Food, Snack

While they are always a horrible choice, some people pull off coloured-lensed glasses, like RDJ, and some people don’t (we’re looking at you Bono). We tried to convince Bobs (we also call RDJ, Bobs) of this fact during our shared 90s rehab stint, but his look sold it to us.

Over the years we have acted as Bobs’ closest confidantes and despite some disagreements (we advised that he never work with Katie Holmes…on the advice of our friend, her daughter Suri), the friendship has been emotionally and professionally fulfilling.

Yes, we wanted him to fulfil us sexually…but that just seems to be how it goes with our friends, so it has never been an issue.

Bobs dropped over between the Australian and US release of Avengers 2: Age of Hard-On (it was definitely title and if not, I had one for Cap anyway), to discuss his work and provide him with crucial advice for the future of the Marvel Cinematic Universe. I reiterate, he really values our opinion.

For one of the highest earning actors, RDJ is so humble, kind and was terrified we would give him a bad review (the movie was magnificent, FYI) and cast him aside (it would never happen).

To celebrate his cinematic triumph and the fact we finally convinced him to push Marvel to sign us as we-can’t-tell-yet superheroes (it is in Phase 4), we whipped up a quick Cobert Downey Jr and discussed our enduringly loving friendship.

You could never say a negative word about cob dip, nor you could put anything wrong inside a cob (well you can, but that is another arrest for another time). While I opted for the (comparatively) lighter spinach and vegie dip, nothing quite says Bunheads marathon like a cheesy bacon option.

Enjoy!

Cobert Downey Jr
Serves: 4-8 if you’re social, 2 if you’re watching Netflix and 1 if you’re watching Netflix and emotional.

Ingredients
1 packet frozen chopped spinach, drained
300ml tub sour cream
250g cream cheese
1 packet spring vegetable soup
2 cob loaves

Method
Pre-heat oven to 180°C.

Cut one of the cobs up into 1 inch dice and lay out flat on a large baking sheet. Cut the top off the second cob loaf, dicing it into large chunks and hollow out cob, ripping it into large-ish chunks. Lay both sets of the aforementioned chunks and the empty cob on a second baking sheet.

Put both baking sheets into the oven and bake for 15 minutes, or until golden.

Meanwhile, mash cream cheese in a large bowl, and mix through sour cream, soup mix and spinach.

When cob is out of the oven, decant the dip into the hollowed cob and place on a serving dish. Whack the chunks of bread in a bowl, on a plate…where ever really. Then devour.

Adam Scottch Eggs

Easter Meggstravaganza, Party Food, Snack

Step three is probably the easiest of Easter Meggstravaganza to follow through with; they aren’t struggling or near death and they aren’t overwhelmed by their hero status.

They are just a TV star (go to 4:08, JLD gets it), after all. Plus, Adam Scott is obsessively in love with both Annelie and I, and would do anything for us.

We first met Adam during our BAT period (Before Amy and Tina) when we were trying to Catfish Amy Poehler into befriending us. Well actually, we were aiming to enter into a polygamist marriage with her, but friendship would have been great. While this particular scheme didn’t bring us to Ames, it did bring us to Adam.

You see, Adam Scott was also catfishing us hoping that he could sleep his way to the top with our persona Anneljamin Juddailes: Record Producer, Hip-Hop Mogul and multiple Academy Award Winner.

It was a messy time for all of us, but after working through our feelings on a scrapped episode of TV Catfish (I refused to both put on pants and be pixellated) we became close friends and well, Adam fell for the people behind the masks.

With Parks and Rec recently finishing Adam called us to let us know that he, and I quote “had some time on his hands and wanted to put them to use,” which was the perfect opportunity for us to all whip up a batch of our famous post-coitus snack, Adam Scottch Eggs and help Meg return to greatness.

Scotch Eggs have a reputation for being quite simplistic or unrefined, but with the right blend of herbs and the addition of hot sauce they become the perfect accompaniment for a beer with a generous dollop of Coolaioli. Enjoy!

Adam Scottch Eggs
Serves: 8.

Ingredients
10 eggs
800g good pork sausages, skins removed
1 small onion, finely diced
1 small clove garlic
handful of chives, finely chopped
handful of parsley, finely chopped
generous pinch nutmeg
1 tbsp English Mustard
½ tsp smoked paprika
1 tsp Tabasco, or to taste
150g breadcrumbs
1-2 cups plain flour
vegetable oil, for frying

Method
Preheat oven to 160°C.

Place eight of the eggs into a pot of cold water and boil for 3-4 minutes. Transfer to a bowl of cold water, peel when cooled and leave aside to dry.

Put the sausage meat into a large bowl with the herbs, nutmeg, mustard, paprika and tabasco and season with salt and pepper. Mix it all together well and separate into eight patties.

One at a time, flatten out the patties, place an egg inside and wrap the patty around until it is completely coated. Leave aside.

Get three small bowls out and place flour in one, breadcrumbs in another and beat the two eggs in the third.

Again, one at a time, roll each sausage/egg ball in flour, followed by the egg and then the breadcrumbs until they are all crumbed and ready to go.

Pour vegetable oil into a large pan until it is roughly 2cm deep and place on stove over medium-high heat. When the oil has come to heat, cook them in batches until the crumb is crisp and golden and then transfer to a lined baking sheet.

When all eggs have been lightly fried, place tray in the oven and bake for 10-15 minutes or until the eggs are browned and cooked through.

Devour.

	Hojichanine Lattalli… on Lena Wafers
	Hojichanine Lattalli… on Vanilla Ice Cream
	Hojichanine Lattalli… on Festive Cirie Fields Mush…
	Hojichanine Lattalli… on Herby Bentllia Chips
	Hojichanine Lattalli… on Shonudi Bowtell

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