RuPaul's Drag Race All Stars

Chocolate, Hazelnut & Mrspresso Eskashagot Davis

Baking, Dessert, RuPaul's Drag Race All Stars, Snack, Sweets, TV, TV Recap

Previously on All Stars the dolls starred in live sketch comedy show RDR live (and despite having three SNL cast members appearing across the season, hilariously none guest judged the episode). After rehearsal, Lala approached Heidi about forming a little bit of an alliance, making Heidi far and away the most protected person on the cast should she ever land in the bottom. One of her OG allies Jimbo absolutely slayed the challenge with light and shade – as did Heidi herself, Jessica and Jaymes – while Kahanna was one note and Naysha just got lost. Ultimately Jimbo took out victory – that runway – and faced off against UK vs. the World nemesis, Pangina, who obviously won the lip sync, leaving Naysha to be sent home by the girls.

Backstage Jimbo was well and truly feeling her oats after taking out the win – murder by lip sync, be damned – while Jessica was gutted to have lost her sister Naysha. Who reminded the dolls that she will always be prettier than them via mirror message, so she is ok to be eliminated. After sitting down to receive her flowers from the dolls, Jimbo revealed she also voted for Naysha given Kahanna just won the week before. On that note Kahanna counted the lipsticks – eventually – gagged to see three votes for her, with Jessica admitting that she just couldn’t bring herself to vote for her Puerto Rican sister. And she did not give a shit about what anyone feels about that decision. MKD then admitted to being the other one that voted for her, opening up that she reacted to Naysha’s emotional plea in Untucked and while Kahanna assured her dolls there is no bad blood, Mrs. Kasha Davis, you in danger girl. And I hate that for us.

The next day the dolls were excited to potentially be lip syncing for $30K this week. Well, if they win, that is. Everyone asked Jaymes about her kerchief, with her admitting it is hankie code for bondage, which made Kahanna wet. Alexis asked everyone if they had been in a swing, with her arm shooting straight up before Jaymes admitted she had, while Heidi offered that she had pushed someone in one, as she is what? A dom top. Ru dropped by to announce that for this week’s Maxi Challenge they would be throwing a little ball. Specifically the Supermarket Ball, first they would be stomping the runway in a Legen-dairy Queen look, the second would be Fruity Patootie and finally they would design and make a Supermarket Supermodel Eleganza look for the third runway. Using only supermarket supplies. Carried in by an epically large Pit Crew and hot damn, my basement is flooded. I mean, it was Spain up in here.

After aggressively rifling through the goods the dolls split up to figure out what the hell they would design, with Jimbo worried about looking messy while MKD admitted the only balls she has dabbled in are Mr Davis’. She ran her ideas by Heidi to try and lock her plan, desperate to prove herself and get out of the safe zone. Jessica meanwhile was drowning in diapers, giddy for her first go at a ball. Jaymes meanwhile was hoping her one sewing class would have her shining, while Lala was drowning in PTSD, knowing she can’t do a viral fuck-up again. And while she assured us she learnt to sew, she forgot to add thread to the machine, so yup. Kandy meanwhile was just confused about what happens in a supermarket, and therefore unsure what to serve and straight up drawing stick figures and shapes for her design.

The Miss Congenialities caught up to reconfirm their alliance and while Heidi cautioned they need to keep it quiet, they got interrupted every ten seconds and ugh, dolls, this ain’t going to work. Kandy meanwhile spiced things up, pointing out Alexis is constantly horny and ready to have the dolls come over for a chicken dinner. While MKD admitted she made out with Darienne back in the day. Ru dropped by to Kiki as Jimbo told her about her weird ideas, leaving Ru in hysterics, despite Jimbo deciding to serve high fashion instead. Darienne’s plan was to serve colour, Alexis was hoping to survive the ball this time – or at least not go blind – with a hyper fashion look while Jessica was just ready to surprise Ru. With diapers. Kahanna was going with some yellow, assuring Ru that from here on out, she will be voting based on revenge – watch out MKD. Heidi’s plan was tequila sunrise, before sobbing as she opened up to Ru about losing her grandmother and how she didn’t get to say goodbye due to COVID. 

Elimination Day arrived with Kandy putting on a brave face despite her nerves, given her look is a bit of a mess. She was hopeful she could be safe however, given Darienne’s look is just a little bit messier. As Lala and Jaymes beat their mugs, Jimbo asked if Lala planned to serve something iconic again and while Kandy admitted she didn’t even notice how bad the bag look was before they took the runway, Lala obviously called shady boots. MKD showed off an image of her husband, with Alexis admitting she was desperate for a relationship while Darienne scoffed, talking about her passion for being single. With everyone talking about how important it is to be ok on your own, before Alexis encouraged them all to love themselves because Alexis. Heidi brought it back to the competition, talking about how there is usually a unanimous vote early on, with everyone dancing around the fact they came to play this season and it is very unlikely there will be one. Essentially.

Ru, Michelle and TS were joined by Lemon, sorry, Jojo Siwa as Jimbo opened the Legen-dairy Queen runway with a mod inspired milk bubble look. Kahanna had her udders out as a slutty cow, Jaymes was iconic serving milk and cookies with hands all over her body before Kandy served glam spilt milk. Alexis ate grass as she stomped the runway as a biker cow, Lala gave bondage cow, Darienne was fold after fold of satin, Jessica was the most glamorous bowl of cereal, MKD gave sour cream – my fave – while Heidi rocked sexy milk man and ugh, she looked good.

When it came to Fruity Patootie, Jumbo served queer icon Warhol, Kahanna served full banana – split me – Jaymes gave us a lemon showgirl number, Kandy popped our cherry as another showgirl, Alexis was stunning as a blueberry, Lala gave slutty caramel apple, Darienne gave messy gown before revealing her banana split bodysuit.Jessica went on a picnic of açai to day drink, MKD served banana Mame before Heidi stole the show as a gloriously plump strawberry.

In their Supermarket Supermodel Eleganza looks, Jumbo stunned in a full lettuce and artichoke gown, Kahanna was a Swedish superhero, Jaymes was stunning in a sexy housewife number, Kandy shimmered in silver – aka foil fire blankets – Alexis gave shimmer and fringe and it was alright before Lala gave Grace Jones realness in cream, getting redemption but probs not the win. Darienne was an absolute mess in strips of colour with crinkled foil trailing behind her. Jessica Wild was perfection as a pink garden nymph while MKD was worse than Darienne selling cake. And so much, too much, colour. While Heidi was a mess, but was lucky to walk after MKD.

Kahanna, Jaymes, Alexis and Heidi were sent to safety before Jimbo received universal praise for each and every look, despite the made look being lettuce glued on a bodysuit. Kandy was read for giving the same silhouette, though they lived for her confidence and the fact her made look mixed things up. Lala meanwhile received all the praise, with the judges in particular proud of her design look. Darienne on the other hand was read for messing up all the details, aside from a solid middle look. Jessica rightly received all the praise for everything she served before MKD was read for only serving sour, not sour cream and while her middle look was perfect, they all agreed her design look was an absolute mess. Completely. Ultimately it was Jessica that took out victory before Jimbo, Kandy and Lala were deemed safe, tragically leaving Darienne and MKD up for elimination.

Backstage Kahanna praised everyone for surviving the ball with them agreeing Jimbo and Kandy would be in the top, while Kahanna didn’t buy Jessica would be in there with them. They all agreed MKD would be in the bottom, though couldn’t agree whether Darienne was a mess. Alexis praised Heidi for her Legen-dairy look, which triggered Heidi, who felt she deserved to be in the top. And with the lack of sleep and stress, she had had it. Officially. Alexis then felt tipsy before borrowing Kandy’s first neckpiece to do a little impersonation. She then realised she had to go back out to the stage though, so her sisters over blushed their cheeks like Kandy to go back out in solidarity. 

As the tops and bottoms joined them, they were confused by their Kandy inspired makeup while the safe girls were gagged by Jessica taking out the win. Jimbo checked in with Heidi to see if she was feeling ok, with the soft and supple queen barely containing her disappointment and ugh, I hate it. They opened up that MKD and Darienne are up for elimination, before Jessica pulled Darienne aside with Ms Lake pointing out her looks weren’t reviled like MKD’s final look and as such, she shouldn’t go. And if she stays, she will have her back. Alliance style. Heidi meanwhile was sassily reading Jimbo’s dairy look. MKD was next to talk to Jessica, admitting while she bombed on the third look, she feels like she deserves to stay – I agree – though assured Jessica she has a loving family waiting for her back at home and as such, she is happy either way. Which disappointed Jessica, given she wanted to see her fight.

Back with the dolls Kandy joked about whether anyone felt they should have been in the top, with Heidi not having her jokes, telling her the dolls will be gagged tonight as she will be quitting. While Kandy tried to assure her she is amazing and will get her time to shine, she was well and truly ready to walk as she felt she has shown enough. Jojo then dropped by backstage and while she was at an 11, I think that was just her, as she thanked the dolls for showing people their talent and for helping make it easier for queer kids. With Kandy in turn thanking her for coming out so visibly and making other kids feel ok to be queer.

With that the dolls voted before Jessica took her place on the stage before Canada vs. the World winner Ra’Jah was announced as the assassin. As soon as Kim Petras Coconuts kicked off, Jessica revealed her epic bouncing kitties under her coat, which obviously had Ru and Michelle in hysterics. While Ra’Jah was just straight up living her best life, turning a show, because that is what does. But Ru loves a bouncing titty, so you know Jessica took out victory and the epic $30K tip. Which broke our little accountant Kandy’s heart to learn she’s back down to only a $10K kitty. Darienne and MKD took their places on stage before Jessica pulled her lipstick out of her wrist, surprisingly not the titty, eliminating MKD from the competition and ugh, I hate it here.

As Mrs. Kasha Davis arrived in the Werk Room, I pulled her in for a massive hug, selfishly, to be held as I sobbed and sobbed over my loss. Well hers, but mine and ours. Through tears, I told her how sad it was to see her go so soon, particularly since I’ve been waiting years and years for what should have been a triumphant return. Given MKD is wise, however, she assured me that she knows how talented she is and as such, is ok going home. And well, I guess that should be ok with me, given she is and forever will be a camp, sweet icon who is more than worthy of a delicious Chocolate, Hazelnut & Mrspresso Eskashagot Davis or six.

I first encountered this little delight at Agnes Bakery, and knew I would have to try a copycat at home. And while, yes, they are a little more flaky than my hand rolled number, they are still delicious. Like a nutella mocha, this melts in your mouth and keeps you coming back for more.

Enjoy!

Chocolate, Hazelnut & Mrspresso Eskashagot Davis
Serves: 8.

Ingredients
1 batch David Croissant dough
1 cup dark chocolate, finely chopped
1 cup hazelnuts, half blitzed and the other half roughly chopped
¼ cup espresso
¼ cup muscovado sugar
1 tsp cinnamon

Method
Prepare David’s recipe all the way through the lamination and final resting process. When that is almost complete, combine the dark chocolate, blitzed hazelnuts, coffee, muscovado sugar and cinnamon in a bowl.

Preheat the oven to 220C.

Roll the dough out until about half centimetre thick – or thicker, given it is tough and I am lazy – smear the chocolatey paste over the top to coat before rolling up from the short end to form a sausage. Cut into 2cm thick discs and pop on a lined baking sheet, before pressing some of the chopped hazelnuts into the top.

Open your oven and with a wet hand, sprinkle in a little water. Transfer the escargot to the oven, spritz with a little more water and close, immediately dropping the temperature to 180C. Bake for 15-20 minutes, or until golden and crisp, spinning the tray halfway through cooking.

Remove and allow to cool for about 15 minutes before devouring, gleefully.


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Chorizo and Nayshacken Alfredopez Pizza

Pizza, Poultry, RuPaul's Drag Race All Stars, Street Food, TV, TV Recap

Previously on All Stars Ru kicked off the season, ominously announcing that there is a new twist. However, left the girls hanging for the rest of the episode. Not wanting to wait around to find out, Jimbo and Kandy quickly formed an alliance, looping in Heidi as they were all tour buddies. After a double-runway mini challenge, the dolls formed girl groups for their mainstage debut. While Jaymes didn’t nail the choreo, she proved herself a star, though it was Kahanna who proved to have the biggest glow up, snatching the first victory. On the flipside, Darienne couldn’t sell her lack of choreo while Monica got stuck in her nerves, leading to them landing in the bottom. Kahanna was gagged to learn that Aja was her lip sync assassin, who promptly slayed the game leaving the girls to send home poor Monica.

Though we learnt her departure also made her the first doll eligible to win the online Fame Games, where the eliminated queens compete for $50K for having the best unused look of the season.

Backstage the dolls were broken hearted as they read sweet Monica’s farewell message, though TBH, Kahanna could barely contain her joy at being seen by not just the judges but her sisters. She then pulled the lip stick out of her titty to share that she also would have sent Monica home. Jimbo then suggested Darienne should count the other girls’ lip sticks, discovering three people joined Monica to vote for Darienne. Kandy immediately copped to it, saying that Monica’s story broke her heart and as such, she was compelled to save her. Quickly leading to Lala and Jaymes using that same excuse. Alexis produced the girls to talk about the Fame Games, with Kandy just glad all the eliminated girls get to show off their looks after working so hard. While Mrs. Kasha Davis was just glad to have a back-up $50K, though Jaymes assured us she only cares about the main prize.

The next day the dolls were thrilled to be back for another week within Mama Ru’s womb, which is the Werk Room, if MKD is to be believed. Speaking of Ru, she dropped by to announce that for this week’s maxi challenge the dolls would be starring in the new sketch show RDR Live. Which yes, will be performed live on the mainstage. After Mama disappeared, the dolls sat down to read through the script and fight for their rolls. Alexis and Darienne fell into playing Jersey Girl Michelle fan-girls, Jessica and Jimbo calmly snatched the gardening hookers, before Naysha, Heidi and Lala fought over the two news anchor roles, with Naysha eventually calmly taking the leftover role. And while she told the girls she could shine in any role, she was also pissed.

Everyone split up to read through their scenes with Jaymes obviously starring – we saw The Bitch who Stole Christmas, after all – while Naysha was on the struggle bus. Thankfully Jaymes was a good sister, telling her to speed up the dialogue to keep the jokes flowing. Jessica and Jimbo were living their slutty best lives, while Darienne and Alexis were just eerily Jersey and perfect. Ru returned with the iconic Bobby Moynihan with Jessica and Jimbo essentially told they were hilarious perfection, whether they had been out of the Werk Room for 13 years or just one. Kahanna, Heidi and Lala were up next, with Kahanna triggered since she was first eliminated in an episode Bobby judged, while Heidi whistled her way through the kiki, so you know that is all it will take to delight Ru.

Elimination Day arrived with Jaymes opening up about how she used to dream of being on SNL, while Lala was just hoping for some acting challenge rudemption after bombing all of them on her OG season. Jimbo checked in on Naysha to see how she felt about taking the back-up role, with Kandy covertly turning talk to how they will vote. Once again she admitted to feeling bad for Monica, though kind of regrets her vote given she was definitely the worst in the challenge, while Naysha admitted she needs to feel excited about seeing you again if she wants to keep you around. Naysha then identified Heidi, Alexis and Jimbo as her biggest threats. While Kandy, on the other hand, said it is a shame Jimbo has to go home this week, though, as Jimbo giggled. Lala meanwhile pulled Heidi aside to float the idea of forming an alliance and well, you know she was soft, supple and keen.

Ru, Michelle and Carson were joined by superstar Robin Thede as Jaymes, Naysha, Heidi and Lala kicked off the show and well, it is clear Jaymes is a star as she dominated everyone. Kandy was cute as the host while MKD owned every damn moment, but it was Jimbo and Jessica who got the most laughs. Specifically Jimbo who just plays horny bimbo so damn well. The news section was a bit of a bust – particularly Kahanna’s cat – though Heidi’s personality carried them through. While Darienne and Alexis were horrifically perfect from start to finish. As was Lala fake playing the saxophone, but only that.

On the Net Gala runway Naysha was stunning in a shimmering, black, punk netted gown, Jaymes was a bright, glam 60s delight with her hair, catch-ed in a net. Kandy served avant garde in tulle, MKD gave butterfly lady in a children’s fantasy movie, Jimbo went inter-net, as a robot influencer and ugh, it was GOOD. Jessica Wild was stun-ning as the apparatus that MKD was keeping her caught butterflies, Heidi gave rocker realness, Lala served only sex, Kahanna gave aquatic queen, in aqua, Darienne gave the sexiest basketball and Alexis was the belle of the ball in black and nude.

Kandy, MKD, Jessica, Lala, Darienne and Alexis were sent to safety before Naysha was praised for giving another stunning look, despite it being understated. While Michelle felt her timing was off in the challenge. Jaymes on the other hand was beloved for all that she did this week, then Jimbo got the same thing but just a little better. Heidi too was beloved for carrying the news section and giving such a bold fashion moment and growing from her first season, while poor Kahanna’s runway was beloved though she was read for being bland in the sketch. Ultimately it was Jimbo that took out her first win of the season while Naysha and Kahanna landed in the bottom two and were up for elimination. Which, duh, since they were the only ones with negative critiques.

Backstage the safe girls were thrilled to relax, while MKD opened up about how much fun she had in the challenge. Alexis and Kandy praised her for being such a star and radiating joy before Kandy praised our Jersey Girls for being ridiculous and fun. Talk turned to who they think will take the win with them unable to pick between Heidi and Jimbo, while they all agreed Naysha is in the bottom with Kahanna. Lala asked the dolls if they have ever considered getting bodywork done rather than padding, before Jessica changed the subject, admitting to having a little crush on Alexis. And gurl, you can do better. The tops and bottoms joined the fun, with Jimbo giddy to have taken out a win before the dolls focused on our poor bottoms. Kahanna was feeling triggered given she was eliminated in the second episode on her OG season, specifically in an acting challenge. 

As she went to sob, Naysha broke down with the girls before Jimbo pulled her aside to plead her case. She assured our Canadian icon that she is not done with the competition and she knows she has more to show. While Heidi got her potato titties out. Naysha rejoined the girls where she reiterated she has so much more to show and that she needs to stay in the competition. Kahanna meanwhile told Jimbo she knows she didn’t do a good job in the challenge, though she also knows it isn’t her time. Particularly with a win under her belt. Which she doubled down on with the girls, before sweet Heidi led the dolls in a toast

With that everyone voted, Jimbo burping through her confessional, before she took her place on the mainstage as Ru gagged and scalped her to reveal this week’s assassin is her UK vs the World sister, Pangina. And do you even need me to wait to confirm what we all know, Pangina won. Though let’s just say Jimbo still turned a show, in her own way, to Cyndi Lauper’s She Bop. Since the song is horny and so is she. But did I mention Pangina? She gave comedy, she gave tricks, she gave emotion and didn’t even appear to break a sweat as Ru crowned her the winner before she sent Naysha packing into the Fame Games.

As she arrived backstage, I pulled her in for a massive hug – those sweet zaddy shoulders – assuring her that while she only managed to survive two episodes, she still managed to show her growth in that time. And that she more than deserved her Miss Continental crown. Her make-up is flawless, her looks are always perfection and girl can turn a show, it is just, tragically, she got a bad run of challenges for her skill set. Which seemed to be all it took to cheer her up – I mean, it is only episode two but we have a front runner for the Fame Games, no? – though I’d argue my Chorizo and Nayshacken Alfredopez Pizza contributed too. (After apologising for cursing her).


The spicy chorizo and the creamy-cheesiness of the alfredo just go perfectly together, so by the time you pop them on a crunchy little pizza with some sweet chicken, well, you’re in heaven.

Enjoy!


Chorizo and Nayshacken Alfredopez Pizza
Serves: 2-4.

Ingredients
1 base as per Pizsa Zsa Gabor
200g roast chicken breast, shredded
2 tbsp unsalted butter 
½ cup chicken stock 
½ cup thickened cream 
1 ⅓ cups parmesan, grated
kosher salt and pepper, to taste
1 cup mozzarella, grated
1 chorizo, cut into coins
Michelle Branch Dressing and chopped parsley, to serve

Method
Prep the base as per Zsa Zsa’s instructions and preheat the oven to 200°C. 

Pop the butter in a medium saucepan over medium heat and cook, stirring, until melted. Whisk in the stock and cream and bring to a boil. Reduce heat to low and simmer for 5 minutes, or until it has started to thicken. Remove from the heat and whisk in the parmesan and half the mozzarella, before seasoning to taste.

Roll out the dough and spread with some of the alfredo sauce, followed by the chorizo, chicken, mozzarella and a little more alfredo. Transfer to the oven to bake for 20 minutes or so, or until golden and bubbling.

Remove from the oven and drizzle with the ranch and sprinkle with some parsley. Then serve and devour triumphantly, knowing you’ll always be a Miss Continental. Even if, like me, it is because of your passion for cuppa soup.


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BBQ Monicken Burgerly Hillz

Burgers, Main, Poultry, RuPaul's Drag Race All Stars, Street Food, TV, TV Recap

Previously on RuPaul’s Drag Race All Stars, Ru gave the people what they wanted, bringing back eight legendary legends to compete for the chance to be the one queen to rule them all. Or ring to rule them all. Or was it for all of them to rule the ring? You know what, it doesn’t matter. Week after week, the winner’s slay and surprised, racking up points to land in two pools with Raja and Yvie battling out for the lesser crown, with Mother taking out the title of Queen of She Done Already Done Had Herses. When it came to the main title, Shea and Trinity had to settle for third/fourth again like Season 9, while Jinkx defeated Monet and became the first – hopefully of many – Queen of All Queens.

But things are back to normal – well, after Ru gave us her best spoken word about fame, or something – as soft and supple Heidi N Closet made her triumphant return to the Werk Room and ugh, I love her so much and damn does she look good. Whether Nicki Minaj likes her make-up or not. She was joined by Mrs Kasha Davis fresh from AA – legitimately – and ugh, I have missed her so much because she is a gorgeous old dame and ugh, just perfection. Speaking of perfection, Naysha Lopez came back beat and blessed, ready for her third elimination, though this time, not until she has proven herself. Another doll with something to prove is Kahanna Montrese – Coco’s girl – and ugh, she has glowed up and is ready to do mama proud. Because she has done the work and is primed to slay. Oh and then Kandy Muse returned and ugh, she is so much fun and I live.

Or die, bitch.

Darienne Lake finally arrived at All Stars and even if I didn’t live for her in Season 6, she is a legend and the fact it has taken until the eighth All Stars to see her back is horrible. Speaking of long overdue returns Monica Beverly Hillz arrived ready to redeem herself from her lack of confidence in Season 5 and yes, Monica, slay that troop outfit. Jaymes Mansfield was up next looking stunning and ugh, please no cheerleading challenges because she is the Jennifer Coolidge of Drag Race and needs to last to the end. THE producer Alexis Michelle was up next, and she is ready to show off all her skills. Because you know she has a lot of them, ok? Like Darienne, Jessica Wild has finally come to All Stars and hot damn, she looked stunning and I am so excited to see what she can do after 13 years.

Then Jimbo cruised on in looking like $20 bucks and ugh, crown her. She is stupid, camp and it looks like she is ready for her win. Speaking of back for a win, Lala Ri is back looking perfect though to be fair, anything is better than her bag look. Literally anything. But I love her, trust and believe. Once they were all sure it was just them, Naysha pointed out that each season has a little twist and as such wanted to figure it out ASAP, with Jessica suggesting it was just her finally getting cast.

Ru arrived to welcome back her daughters – or in the words of Teresa Giudice, dor-tors – before shutting down Naysha’s theory, announcing rules are defaulting back to the usual All Stars ones. Aka the winner takes on an assassin with the winner sending a sister home if she wins, otherwise the group votes to boot a bottom. Even though, duh, we’re all bottoms. Oh and the $200k prize is here to stay. But there is also a second way to win this year, Raja style, though Ru won’t give them the deets until later. Scaring Jimbo, since she can’t even win one way!

They kicked things off with a little dual-runway Mini Challenge, the first being Famous Then where Alexis slayed as slutty Mame in shimmering white. Kahanna was a stunning showgirl in black velvet, Heidi was opulent and camp, ready for the hat parade, while Mrs. Kasha Davis was stunning as Zigfield Follies Extra #2. Nayasha served Coco Chanel realness, Kandy took it more modern with a Supermodel RuPaul look before Darienne went all the way back to medieval in a purple gown. Monica slayed as glam Cleopatra, Jaymes was stunning in a slutty Mexican showgirl number, Jessica Wild was perfection as Nefertiti while Jimbo gave the most perfectly demented Marilyn. Oh and Lala was a glittering hour glass and looked stun. Ning.

On the Famous Now runway Alexis gave full Kim K realness, Kahanna looked like hot Barbie Lil Nas X, Heidi gave kabuki bow, MKD was a perfect Kris Jenner disco ball, Naysha was full Versace glam – Ver, Sayce – Kandy was stunning in pink fur while Darienne Lake was a hilariously old Billie Eilish, Monica gave Kim Petras perfection, Jaymes gave Jojo Siwa does Judy Jetson, Jessica was stunning in a red latex Bad Bunny inspired look, Jimbo served a perfect ode to the horror of social media before Lala Ri gave nude illusion for her Ru-ly Fans.

The dolls returned to the Werk Room where they started to untuck before Alexis admitted to having a crush on Lala. Kandy meanwhile was kikiing with the dolls about who they were shocked to see, with Kahanna and Naysha admitting Jimbo crossing to the US was the biggest gag to them. Speaking of Jimbo, she was busy charming her new sisters though, with everyone delighted by the fact that she loves to compete. While Jessica joked about how much things have changed since Season 2, given they aren’t rocking Forever 21 (hey, as long as it isn’t any more fucking H&M). Lala Ri meanwhile joked about not needing to be nice given you can’t win Miss Congeniality. Oh and then we learnt that for some reason, Heidi was wearing a denim codpiece while Darienne and Jaymes just speculated about the twist in the corner.

Ru came back to kiki with the dolls announcing that for their opening Maxi Challenge the dolls would form rival girl groups and perform rumixes of Fenton and Randy’s Money Success Fame & Glamour. Naysha, Darienne, Kahanna, Kandy, Alexis and Heidi got the glam rock version while MKD, Jaymes, Lala, Jimbo, Monica and Jessica were given the disco remix. Oh and in addition to writing their own verses, they’d also have to choreograph their routine before performing live on the mainstage. After quickly working through their songs, the dolls all went to the mainstage to work on the choreography with Heidi taking the lead for Team Glam Rock. And like Jaymes and Jimbo, I don’t know how Fosse makes sense but I love Heidi, so I’ll let it slide. Plus, Kandy was willing to call out her lack of star quality in choreography, so I don’t need to read her. And well, let’s just say, she was pressed, not blessed. Team Disco meanwhile were living their best lives as Lala and Jessica took the lead giving on brand choreography. The problem being Jessica was slaying while the rest of the dolls were lost. Like, not even on the map.

Elimination Day arrived with the dolls immediately splitting up to beat their mugs with Darienne ready to motorboat Jimbo, as Lala and Jaymes were kikied about the latter planning to bring down by winging it, should she forget the choreography. Naysha meanwhile was busy lifting up Monica who was super nervous and just couldn’t get out of her head. Oh and then Kandy and Jimbo – and Heidi – formed a little alliance to navigate the rumoceracy and ugh, I live for them finally playing it like Survivor superfan, Monet. Talk turned back to the twist before Alexis assured the dolls she would be playing fair, whatever it is. Jimbo agreed, cautioning everyone to not play too hard, given it came back to bite her on UK VS the World while Kandy reminded them things are always going to be messy so suggested they just relax and do what needs to be done.

Ru, Michelle and the hilarious Ross Mathews were joined by the indelible Adele Dazeem. Fame Tarts were up first with the Glam Rock version and well, they were good, hitting every beat, cohesive and so damn fun. None more so than Kahanna who showed she is fully baked and ready to star. The Glitter Chicks meanwhile served full disco and I live. Jaymes was demented, Jessica was sexy, Jimbo was hilarious, Lala gave Bey, MKD was camp perfection and well, poor Monica was lost but looked soooooo good, which is all that matters.

On the Famous Forever – aka signature Drag – runway, Alexis was stunning serving Jessica Rabbit realness. Darienne was a shimmering leopard print glamazon, Heidi was full Chris Tucker zebra pimp, Kahanna was STUNNING as a literal phoenix, Kandy gave metallic red glam, Naysha served icy glam bodysuit, Jaymes gave old Hollywood perfection, Jessica looked like a rocker ringmaster in all the right ways, Jimbo was a neon brain delight, Lala Ri gave showgirl gone to a wedding, Monica looked beautiful in a purple fringed bodysuit while MKD gave glam purple housewife.

Ultimately Heidi, Kandy, Naysha, Jessica, Jimbo and MKD were sent to safety before Alexis received universal praise for all of her looks and for taking big risks. Oh and they loved that in the performance, she served star. Darienne meanwhile was read for being too pedestrian on the first two runways, though they loved her energy in the performance. Choreography be damned! Kahanna meanwhile received wall to wall praise for each and every thing she served this week. As did Jaymes, particularly for her serving demented layers and giving such different concepts. Oh and they didn’t care that she couldn’t dance. Lala meanwhile was praised for her star power in the performance and for giving 2 out of 3 perfect looks. While Monica’s first runway was beloved, though she was read for being completely overcome by her nerves. She then started to sob as Ross encouraged her to own her power which was both sweet – thanks Ross – and heartbreaking. Ultimately Kahanna took out the first win of the season before Alexis, Jaymes and Lala were deemed safe, leaving Darienne and Monica up for elimination. And well, I hate it here.

Backstage the safe girls were exhausted but thrilled to have made it through the first week, sharing that they love Untucked more than anything. With Heidi admitting it was just because she wanted to see a fight, which made everyone immediately look at Kandy. For obvious reasons. Heidi meanwhile turned conversation back to the twist speculating the eliminated girls could vote someone back in, that fans will vote for a winner or my fave, that they are the tops and all the other girls are up for elimination. Speaking of the actual tops and bottoms, they returned with everyone praising a jubilant Kahanna on her win. Though she was nervous about her vote having to dictate the tone of the season.

Both Darienne and Monica opened up about being heartbroken to have landed in the bottom, Monica in particular as she sobbed in her friend Naysha’s arms. Kahanna pulled her aside to kiki, assuring her she thinks she is a star and that she was so excited to see her in the competition. While poor Monica was just so down on herself and it was hard to watch. Darienne meanwhile was telling the dolls her fashion choices cost her, reminding them how badly she wants to be here. The bottoms switched places with Monica telling her sisters she deserves to be here and has worked her arse off to shine. As Jessica and Alexis tried to lift her up, before Alexis sobbed about feeling bad for the girls. And because she wasn’t sure how she’d be received. Like, sobbing. And god her sisters were confused. Like, you thought Milk crying over being safe was bad? This is sobbing for being in the top. 

Darienne meanwhile held it WAY more together, assuring Kahanna she is a star and is fired up to be here. Naysha and Kandy meanwhile were busy whispering, with Naysha not wanting to vote out her childhood friend Monica, nor her teammate Darienne. Before Alexis could start sobbing again, Idina Menzel dropped backstage to kiki with the dolls with Alexis thanking her for being such a star. Idina then told the dolls to channel someone they admire on their off days, before regalling them with tales and ugh, she is so cute and sweet and I love her.

With that the dolls voted before Kahanna took her place on the mainstage before Ru pulled up the curtains to reveal our first lip sync assassin of the season, the iconic Aja LaBeija. Kandy’s mama, ok? And as soon as Beyonce’s Freakum Dress kicked off, Aja owned the show. She was flicking wigs, camp and hitting every lyric. She was flipping and splitting and well, I THOUGHT SHE WAS GOING TO JUMP FROM THERE as she vogued the house down. Kahanna was also a star and showed she is not to be counted out, but Aja is Aja and seeing her perform on the mainstage was perfection and I need her back ASAP. After Aja took out the win – that $10k rolling over to next week – Kahanna took her place at the back of the stage before Ru finally announced that other way to win, with us fans getting the chance to vote on the unused runways of the eliminated queens for a cash prize of $50K.

Oh and that first eliminated queen, tragically, was Monica who wasn’t exactly shocked, but watching her put on a brave face felt tragic. I pulled her in for a hug as soon as she returned to the Werk Room, telling her to get whatever negative thoughts she may have out of her mind and remember that she is not only beloved by the fandom, but super talented and has been thriving as her true self for such a long time. And we were lucky enough to see that in her return. I then reiterated that first boots are always beloved and that she has nothing more to prove, so to simply be proud of her success and smash a big, juicy BBQ Monicken Burgerly Hillz.


While this is quite a kick, simple and, gulp, healthy burger, there is something infinite satisfying. No oil to contend with while being all at once fresh and tangy, it is the ultimate choice when you need a quick little burger pick-me-up.

Enjoy!


BBQ Monicken Burgerly Hillz
Serves: 2.

Ingredients
olive oil
1 chicken breast, halved horizontally
1 tsp smoked paprika
½ tsp chilli powder
½ tsp cumin
kosher salt and pepper, to taste
2 Briocher Bünsberg
3 tbsp Chicktina Big McDonald Sauce
2 slices American cheese
1 tomato, sliced
1 cup Slawren Rimmer
chips, fries, wedges or whatever your side of choice may be, to serve 

Method
Pop the chicken in a bowl with two teaspoons of oil, the paprika, chilli powder, cumin and a good whack of salt and pepper, and toss until well combined. Heat a lug of oil in a skillet over medium heat, add the chicken and cook for a few minutes before flipping and cooking for another 3-5 minutes, or until cooked through. Remove from heat and leave to rest.

To assemble, toast the inside of the rolls and smear with some of the sauce. Pop a slice of cheese on the base, followed by some tomato, the chicken and the slaw before closing. And then devouring, regally, with a shit tonne of your favourite sides.


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