Previously on RuPaul’s Drag Race, we got to seperate the contenders from the pretenders – not the band, FYI – with Snatch Game where Alexis, Nina and Sasha dominated … and Peppermint and Cynthia completely choked. Then Peppermint murdered Cynthia in the lip sync roughly 100 times over and the cucu queen exited the competition in tenth place. Again.
The queens ruturned to the werk room where Shea said what we were all thinking, that Peppermint is a lip sync assassin. Trinity was quick to get everyone over Cynthia’s departure and proclaimed herself as the new cucu. And to think, I thought we’d never have to hear that word again until the reunion.
Trinity did a 180 from gurl-byeing Cynthia and congratulated Alexis on her first win, probably thankful that it helped them avoid a tantrum the likes of which wouldn’t have been seen since Alaska’s meltdown in All Stars 2. Sweet Valentina was quick to point out that we now run the risk of watching Alexis turn this into her show, which I’m not exactly sure how I feel about.
Nina felt that this challenge was a turning point for her and thanked the queens for their support before Sasha had a turn at her secondary Snatch Game character, giving us a pitch perfect Farrah Moan.
Then Trinity helped Valentina remove the censor bars from her nipples which was nowhere near as exciting as it sounds – dem nips got fucked up.
After bathing their nips in vaseline and aloe to rid themselves of the surrogate pain, the queens returned to the werk room the next day – Valentina, thankfully feeling ok – where Alexis confessed to having a sex dream. Sadly Ru entered before we could snatch the deets, thankfully though he announced that they would be filming a ‘90s teen drama 9021-Ho under the directorship of my gurls Torz Spell and J-Garth!
As the loser, Peppermint was allowed to dish out the roles which is arguably worse than landing in the bottom two. Trying to be a diplomat she polled the girls on which roles they liked, which ended up completely backfiring when Aja threw a tantrum about not getting one of the roles she wanted. Thankfully Shea was as irritated as the audience and offered to swap roles and put her, us and the other queens out of their misery.
This ultimately made Aja feel childish, yet not concerned that she traded one of the lead roles for a cameo in the last scene. Thankfully for her, Alexis then made it her job to coach everyone on 90210 and rubbed them all the wrong way.
The queens arrived at rehearsal with the undisputed queens of West Beverly High where Shea slayed, Nina struggled with her lines and scared the shit out Jen in the process and poor Farrah just couldn’t even remember who she was playing. Trinity stole the show as an even more deranged version of Regina George’s mother, Aja tongue-fucked Peppermint’s mouth and Valentina was just completely adorable.
The next day Aja was feeling bad about the way she behaved, before the queens swapped prom stories – obviously Valentina was prom king and of course Alexis went in drag – before Trinity made it real, sharing that she quit high school at 16 to look after her dying grandmother and home schooled herself. To make it even more tragic, she was raised by her grandmother after her mother dies from HIV complications when she was 8.
Shea then shared a story about mending his relationship with his sick father and Sasha spoke about being a bald queen because of her mother’s battle with breast cancer.
WHY DOES RU WANT ME TO CRY EVERY EPISODE?
Thankfully Ru put me out of my misery and introduced the big hair runway, which sadly had nothing to do with showing off vintage pubes. Lack of bush aside, all of the queens looked beautiful on the runway.
Ru then premiered 9021-Ho where Shea slayed the role that Aja threw away, as did Valentina and Alexis, though none of them held a candle to the madness that was Trinity Taylor. On the flipside, Sasha was underwhelming and Nina and Aja struggled … though thankfully it was not as bad as Cynthia in Snatch Game.
Ultimately Trinity took out the challenge while Nina and Aja found themselves in the bottom two, providing us the best lip sync of the season. Sadly poor Aja was told to sashay away whilst, I assume, wishing that she held on to the role of Grandrea Zuckerman.
I’ve known Aja for a couple of years and I knew she would be super disappointed to get the axe from the competition. Wanting to avoid another tantrum, I thought it best to whip up her favourite Chicken, Ajacado & Peach Sushi as we reconnected / she decompressed from the competition.
The combination of the creamy avocado and – and as you’d expect – cream cheese, the sweet peaches and the chicken create the perfect snack to wash away the pain of losing.
Or you know, will just make you happy – enjoy!
Chicken, Ajacado & Peach Sushi
2 cups sushi rice
¼ cup sushi vinegar
10 sheets nori
2 chicken breasts, grilled and sliced
2 avocados, halved and thinly sliced
2 peaches, peeled, pitted and sliced
250g cream cheese, thinly sliced
wasabi, to taste
kewpie mayo, to serve
pickled ginger, to serve
Rinse the rice under cold water until it runs clear. Place the rice in a large saucepan with 3 cups of cold water and bring to the boil. Reduce heat, cover and simmer for 15 minutes.
Remove from the heat and stand, covered, for five minutes.
Transfer to a large bowl and stir through the sushi vinegar and allow to cool.
Now, round up all the elements and, most importantly, a bamboo mat. Place the nori shiny side down on the bamboo mat and spread a thin layer of rice over the nori leaving a couple of centimetres clear at the end.
Lay the chicken at one end and top with slices of avo, peach and cream cheese. Lift the edge of the bamboo mat closest to you and roll away, tightly. As you’re about to get to the end, brush the excess end of the nori with water and finish rolling. Press the seam together and allow to rest while you repeat the process until it is all done.
Once they are done, slice into pieces – I went two-three per roll – with a wet knife.
Then, obviously, devour slathered in wasabi, kewpie mayo, pickled ginger and/or soy.
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