Previously on Australian Survivor Kaelan had a record breaking win at the immunity challenge, unwittingly ruining Myles’ plan to blindside him in the process. AJ meanwhile was growing more and more aware that Kaelan wasn’t in anyone’s endgame but his, so tried to convince him that Kate needed to stay to guarantee that he and AJ have the numbers, as Kate will always be more of a target. Sadly for AJ, Zara put her foot down and wouldn’t budge as Kate is her only remaining competition in the endurance challenges. Like say, the final immunity. At tribal council, JLP surprised everyone with a second immunity challenge, which was obviously won by Kate thwarting their plans and forcing Morgan out the door. Basically.
The next day the final five awoke, once again thrilled to be so close to the end. Zara in particular was proud to have made it so far. Though was also aware that this is where the Postgraduates would likely have to break up, given they could pair up and work with Kate to take control and get to the final three. Right on cue, Myles joined her by the shore to float the idea of getting rid of AJ next, given they would easily be able to get Kaelan to work with them to get rid of Kate at the final four, given he already wants her gone. Though given he mentioned the jury’s face when he betrays AJ, it is unlikely Zara would get onboard as it isn’t a move for her. Wait, no, she confirmed to us that she needs a big flashy move, so was happy to follow Myles’ chaos. Sadly for her though, Myles was pitching the plan to Zara for no other reason than he can beat her in the final two.
Let’s pause here to say that given we’ve locked in a plan in the first five minutes, it is clear AJ is winning immunity tonight, no?
Back at camp Myles got to work making a fire, opening up to us that he wanted to use his idol to guarantee his place in the final four, as it expires tonight. He then talked to AJ about the fact that Morgan going home put an end to his plan to get rid of Kaelan, so was all in on getting rid of Kate tonight. AJ then went straight to Kaelan to let him know that he was clearly the target, and as such, Kaelan and AJ needed to pull in Kate to take Myles out instead. AJ then caught up with Zara, with him pointing out that he knows Myles is gunning for Kaelan and as such, they just needed to get him out instead. Filling Zara and Myles with confidence that nothing will get in the way of their plan, given AJ was so focused on Kaelan being in trouble that he couldn’t see what was right in front of him.
You know that that means, right? JLP arrived for the immunity challenge where they would have to use a pole to carry blocks over a trip obstacle and build a tower of 12 blocks. Simple, but oh so difficult. And also a little boring to recap. Despite being ripped and therefore huge when squeezing under an obstacle, Kaelan got out to an early lead. Though his size eventually got in the way, as he just as quickly dropped. AJ too was struggling, while Kate, Myles and Zara made the most of their smaller frames. Kate continued to power ahead until she lost them all, allowing Kaelan to close the gap and take the lead once again. While Zara continued her slow and steady approach from each and every challenge. Kaelan dropped while placing his eleventh block, putting Myles and Zara back in the lead, while AJ – who I predicted twice would win immunity, just kept dropping. The duo raced to place their final two blocks, with Myles dropping on the final one allowing Zara to gently place it, finally having her slow and steady strategy jag her the win.
Back at camp Zara continued her episode of vibing, thrilled to be immune and ready to use that safety to make a major, resume building move. Despite the nerves. She and Myles caught up, locking in their vote for AJ, and asking Kate to vote Kaelan so they can throw her under the bus at four and keep Kaelan voting with them. Zara went back to camp while Myles went to talk to Kate, asking if she would be keen to vote Kaelan. And given the other option was herself, she obviously agreed. His plan, however, was for things to end up tied between Kate and AJ with a random vote for Kaelan, and on the revote, they would take out AJ. But it feels like something will fall apart, right? Zara then caught up with Kaelan, who begged her to save him in return for him protecting her at four. Kaelan’s plan was to get them to split between Kate and Myles, and try to bait Myles into playing his idol incorrectly to get rid of him instead. Knowing that Myles had an idol, AJ knew that he needed to have Kate onboard, so pulled her aside and locked in her vote for Myles.
AJ and Zara then caught up by the fire, with AJ still completely sure that Kaelan was in trouble. She agreed he should be nervous, though assured AJ if they just stay calm, all will be okay. Zara then disappeared to talk to Kate, who said that Myles had told her to vote for Kaelan, so she would. Rather than be happy that the plan looked to be coming together, Zara realised that everyone was planning to vote for someone different and as such, she could literally decide who to vote out at tribal council. Meaning we’re actually getting a boring Kate vote, aren’t we? Zara, I was rooting for you!
Zara went to Kaelan to talk through his plan, before catching up with Myles who admitted he is actually kind of sad about voting out AJ. He then confirmed with Zara that he told Kate to vote Kaelan, and while that appeared to calm her, she started to get paranoid about how she could get to the final two. AJ and Myles finally caught up, with AJ begging him to just play the idol for himself, then making a joke about Myles not voting for him. And seeing the unconditional trust and support from AJ made Myles breakdown in confessional, upset about putting an end to his allies’ dreams. But he knew he had to, if he wanted to live out his.
At tribal council the jury arrived sans Morgan who JLP shared had opted to quit the jury and head home, explaining her terrible edit. Zara quickly got us back on track, talking about how thrilled she was to take out immunity and have some free time on her hands. Kate on the other hand was terrified about going home. Myles mentioned that tribal lines don’t mean anything anymore, and that they were all focused on making it to the end. Zara agreed that they’ve all run all of the numbers, while Kaelan admitted he is super nervous to be without immunity for once. Zara spoke about how her game has focused on different skills, though it has left her without a shiny move to pitch to the jury. And she is done playing babysitter to Myles and office manager to AJ. Though trust and believe, JLP, she didn’t decide to make the move she is making tonight just because she is immune. Kaelan agreed he wouldn’t be shocked if people made a crack at him, while Myles believed tonight’s vote would ultimately be a 500K decision for someone.
AJ was more hopeful though, sure that there are multiple different paths to the end, while Kate quoted Chenbot from US Big Brother and told everyone to expect the unexpected. Myles mentioned it is important to know who you want to sit next to at the end, though it doesn’t mean you need to get those that you don’t want to sit next to out tonight. Plus, some people already have some solid resumes and as such, sticking with the plan could actually be the best move. Though the plan was to get to four and from tomorrow, they’re there and will need numbers. With that the tribe voted – everyone for a different person – before Zara cast the deciding vote, which after Myles played his idol, we were gagged to learn was Kate. Much to the shock and disappointment of the jury, everyone at home and Myles, who showed his cards with AJ.
Given Kate is an absolute ball of joy and energy, she was still a vibe queen as she arrived at the Jury Villa. I pulled her in for a massive hug and thanked her for bringing the lightness and fun throughout the season. While it was kind of boring to see the Postgraduates steamroll after the Logan vote, the last few rounds have still been interesting as Kate never gave up and was throwing everything at the wall. Which is how an icon behaves, TBH. And that alone is all it takes to earn her bodyweight in Kate Gloueerchis.
I first learned of beer cheese from Vanderpump Rules’ very own Kentucky Muffin Brittany Cartwright. And while I firmly question her taste in men, her taste in comfort food is on point. Rich and gooey, this may not be meemaw’s recipe, but it is still delicious on just about anything.
Enjoy!
Kate Gloueerchis Serves: 2 good friends. No, 2 *best* friends.
Ingredients 3 tbsp unsalted butter 3 tbsp flour ½ tsp garlic powder ½ tsp chilli powder ¼ tsp smoked paprika ¾ cup milk ⅔ cup beer 1 tsp Worcestershire sauce 1 tsp dijon mustard ¼ tsp salt pepper, to taste 2 ½ cups vintage cheddar cheese, grated
Method Pop the butter in a medium saucepan over medium heat and once foamy, add the flour, garlic powder, chilli powder and smoked paprika, and whisk together until it forms a paste. Remove from the heat and slowly whisk in the milk, before returning to the heat and cooking for a minute. Whisk in the beer, Worcestershire, dijon, salt, and a good whack of pepper.
Remove from the heat and stir through the cheese until combined. Serve immediately and devour with crudités. Or my personal choice, some Buffally Chicks in Blankettle.
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Previously on Australian Survivor Jaden woke up after Winna’s blindside. Both literally, in the middle of the night to workout, and figuratively in the game, given he literally spent the first month vibing, joking and having a good time. Mark won a car at an epic reward challenge – costing him the season in the process – and used an epic BBQ reward to help Valeria, Kitty and Caroline reconcile. At immunity challenge, Jaden didn’t go for the joke and give up, snatching his first win. With the Titans seemingly back together, Eden tried to rally the troops to get rid of Ray and weaken the Rebels. At tribal council, however, Feras and the Rebels felt something was up and decided to load their votes on Eden. And then on the revote, Jaden flipped to send Eden home, for getting rid of Winna.
The next day Caroline pulled Feras aside to apologise for turning on him mere hours after forming an alliance. She then went back to the shelter, where Kitty was sobbing, heartbroken for superfan Eden. While Ray literally sat beneath them laughing about being the number one physical threat on the tribe, so it makes sense they were targeting him of all people. Then awkwardly laughing about how his jokes just don’t seem to be landing for them. Feras and Aileen caught up by the well, trying to figure out who could actually be useful for their game moving forward. Feras opened up to us about how much he relies on Aileen to edit his ideas and keep him in check. He listed off the potential allies, Kitty and Caroline, and Jaden, and even Kirby at this point. But given every mention of Kirby’s name leads to rattlesnakes, I feel like Aileen may be voted out to weaken Feras.
Feras then went back to Caroline to assure her that there are no hard feelings and that he would love to ride it to the end with her and Kitty. He then returned to camp to chat to Aileen and Alex, while Kirby looked on suspiciously. She opened up to us about how she has been sitting back and watching post-merge, but feels like she has collected as much information as she needs to make a move. Starting with getting rid of Aileen, so that Feras has no other option but to align with her. And again, why didn’t they just align on day one and not bicker, you know?
The tribe met JLP in the middle of the jungle for the Survivor Auction with each getting $500 to spend, and as usual, the auction would end at any time without notice. Ray went hard for popcorn and lemonade, spending $400, and ugh, I love to see our king win. Aileen spent $500 for a covered item which ended up being fried chicken. Despite Ray trying to spend $100 for pizza, Kirby won it for $500. Caroline spent $420 for brownies, ice cream and diarrhoea in about half an hour. Parmie and beer went to Valeria for $120, which honestly is such a bargain. Even though she gave the beer to JLP. Feras then pointed out he would like whatever is under a box off to the side, with him straight up paying his entire $500 for. Which was money well spent from an oral health perspective, as it was a toothbrush, toothpaste and some mints to take back to camp. As he brushed his teeth, Ray found a little surprise in his popcorn, which is what we can assume Feras thought would be hidden under the aforementioned box.
Back at camp Feras offered everyone a little mint as they chuckled about his misfortune, while Raymond excused himself to learn that his advantage is an interesting little twist on an idol, where if every single person votes for him, his vote becomes the only one that counts. And to make it even more exciting, he has to use it in the next three tribal councils. Dangerous but fun, so thankfully Ray found it as he is a king. He returned to camp to loop in Feras and ugh, why do I now get the sad feeling he is going home tonight. Not my sweet angel Ray-Ray!
That night Kirby couldn’t sleep as the potential options continued to spin around her head. She knew that Feras is somebody she wanted to work with and as such, she needed Aileen out if it is ever going to work. She woke Feras up to assure him that she is definitely Rebel strong as a cover, throwing out Mark as her main target with a split on Caroline. And while it is all I lie, their banter is such a joy that I just wish she was up front with him to solidify their power couple status. We then got a 3am timestamp to show that Kirby is still wide awake, as Jaden caught up with her to talk about how Eden betrayed him and the Titans kept leaving him out of chats, thus turning on them. As such, she played into what he needed from her, chatting through options and casually suggesting the two of them and Rianna work with the OG Titans to get rid of Aileen next.
The next morning Kirby was energised, despite no sleep, so she and Rianna pulled Kitty aside to let Her know what the Rebels were planning. But assured her they have a lifeline for Caroline, and that is if all the Titans stick together and vote Aileen. And while they aren’t 100% they can trust Kirby, they are also kind of screwed and had to. Kitty pulled Caroline, Mark and Valeria aside, with Mark and Caroline very much against the idea of turning on Feras, while Kitty and Valeria agreed that Kirby will stick with the Rebels if they don’t agree to work with her.
The tribe caught up with JLP for the immunity challenge where they would hold onto a rope to balance a disc while walking back and forth down a lane to stack blocks on top of it. Jaden got out to an early lead, calmly powering along, as everyone else nipped at his heels. Well, except for Kirby, who could only vibe with one block. Tragically after loading up the sixth block, Jaden dropped and had to start over, allowing Aileen to take out the lead with Feras nipping at her heels. For a second, as he too dropped. Aileen continued to power ahead as Kitty closed the gap, though her nerves really kicked in as she started to walk back to the mat after stacking all the blocks. As she barely moved, Kitty closed the gap and tried to overtake before Aileen dropped them all only centimetres from the mat. Giving Kitty all the time in the world to work her way back and collect immunity.
Back at camp Kitty gave her sympathy to Aileen for dropping so close to the end before Feras pulled the Rebels aside to lock in the vote against Mark. He and Aileen went for a walk in the jungle to lock in the vote split, while figuring out how to apologise to Caroline after. He caught up with Caroline to let her know that while the Rebels want her gone, he and Aileen were able to flip things to Mark instead, but assured her that they can still trust each other despite the fact she will be seeing her name come up. Kirby and Jaden, meanwhile, were giggling about their plan coming together. She then got Valeria and Kitty to keep Mark and Caroline from spiralling, given she doesn’t want Feras to see her discussing anything and spooking him. Caroline told the trio that Feras warned her that votes were coming her way and as such, she was terrified. Kitty tried to keep them together as Caroline reiterated that they just don’t know if they can trust Kirby.
Feras and Alex watched on, clocking how nervous they were and as such, caught up with Caroline. She denied having heard any names which made Feras more and more nervous that something was afoot, given it is very clear she was lying to him. He then went in search of Kitty, knowing she is far more likely to crack, pledging his undying allegiance to her while she continued to be evasive. Alex joined them, as Feras continued to push hard for information until she eventually mentioned she promised to stick to their plan. Ray, Feras and Alex figured out that Kirby must be part of what the Titans think they have planned, so the Rebels decided to lock in all their votes for Mark to minimise the risk of errors. Caroline continued to spiral, crying in Kitty’s arms about how nervous she is and that she doesn’t know if she could trust Kirby. While Kirby was busy being awkward with Feras and Ray when they tried to joke around with her and while the newbies aren’t the best gamers, they do make for great TV.
At tribal council Feras spoke about his hope that the Rebels would be able to stick together for at least a few rounds, while Kirby joked about the Titans clearly being sitting ducks. Caroline continued to lead with her nerves, stating this is the most nervous she has felt all game long. Alex likened the scramble to the school yard, particularly how quickly relationships can end. Kitty joked about being grateful she is safe given the drama, while Valeria shared how hopeful she is to have found some cracks. Given a few people have become way too confident and as such, they need to go ASAP. Particularly those with idols. Kirby then reiterated it might be time for Alex to play his, as Aileen confirmed not one has been played correctly yet. Yet. Feras started to whisper to Aileen about the fact Kirby has clearly flipped on them and as such, they tried to figure out how to save themselves. Kirby spoke about how she and Rianna felt like they’re on the bottom of the majority, with today being the first time she has heard a name. Which is better than the last few rounds.
With that the tribe voted, Alex made a show of not playing his idol before Aileen was gagged to find herself blindsided from the game. At the very least, to become the Queen of the Jury. As she arrived at the Jury Villa, I pulled her in for a massive hug and assured her that while she wasn’t the standout character of the season, it was clear she is an epic gamer and as such, seems primed for a return. Given her threat will be lower, while her skillz are clearly high. Which was such a great pep talk that she perked right up and got to joyfully smashing a vat of Aileen Choddess Dressing together.
While their are many variations on what constitutes a goddess dressing or sauce, the one consistency, is their bright, freshness. And therefore, this well and truly fits the bill. Zingy and packing a punch, it works on just about anything and will have you coming back for more and more.
Enjoy!
Aileen Choddess Dressing Serves: 2 dear friends.
Ingredients 2 avocados, halved ¼ cup greek yoghurt, plus extra to taste ½ cup coriander ½ cup basil 1 jalapeño, halved and seeded 1 lemon, zested and juiced 1 tsp cumin 1 garlic clove, minced kosher salt and black pepper, to taste
Method Pop everything in a blender or food processor, and blitz until smooth, adding a tablespoon of yoghurt at a time until it reaches your desired consistency.
Season to taste, then devour as you see fit.
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Previously on Australian Survivor Feras found a buried treasure, which, after grabbing a key from their reward, was able to unlock and learn it was home to an idol. Tragically for him, he was caught by everyone and while he tried to keep it secret, it was clear no one believed him. At the immunity challenge he stirred the pot with the Titans, asking whether anyone had found their treasure yet. And while they questioned whether he was being truthful, Mark’s ears well and truly pricked up on the way to the Titans narrowly jagging another immunity. Back at camp Aileen emerged to orchestrate a split vote between Alex and Tobias, which would ultimately result in Sarah having to decide which of her allies go home. Knowing he would be a threat if he didn’t, Feras played his not-so-hidden idol before Kelli stirred things up by switching her vote to Tobias and sending him out of the game without needing to involve Sarah.
The next day the mood was rather sombre at the Rebels camp as Sarah was in tears over Tobias’ surprise exit. On her birthday, no less. Kelli decided to be up front with her, admitting she changed plans at tribal because she felt it was the right thing to do. Kelli then broke down in tears and recited poetry as Sarah tried not to smack her, and hot damn, Sarah and Alex are in with a chance. As that little display is honestly enough to flip anyone into getting rid of her. Kelli approached Alex and implied that she is the sole reason he is still here, overstepping and telling him it was to allow him the chance to grow. And that he owes her, essentially. Instead, he started to run through names of other people he could work with. Feras and Kirby meanwhile were hanging in the ocean, assuring each other that there won’t be any more secrets between them. And that trust is still there. After they split up, Alex and Sarah approached Kirby to float the idea of making a move against Feras, given he is in a power position. And is the holder of the Titans’ treasure key.
Over at Titans, Jaden and Winna were busy singing everyone awake in the style of my dear Celine Dion – in honour of her triumphant Grammys appearance, no doubt – before talk turned to the potential treasure chest. Charles and Mark were well and truly believing everything Feras told them, while the rest of the tribe were a little bit disinterested. Mark opened up about the fact Viola and Valeria are his closest allies, and as such, they got to work hunting for the chest together. Well, Mark and Valeria, that is. Viola was busy being bench-pressed by Jaden. After finding it and realising it was locked, they quickly rehid it and returned back to camp to figure out how to convince the Rebels to hand him the key.
The tribes came together with Jonathan in the middle of the jungle for the latest reward challenge where they would have to face off one at a time, racing to knock over the other tribe’s two idols of perches. With the first tribe to 4 jagging a full kids birthday party. Alex and Nathan were first to battle with Alex quickly jagging the first point for the Rebels. Valeria then scored for the Titans, mainly because Rianna once again made an odd choice in a challenge. And side note, could someone check on her as she seems to be struggling with the lack of food. Feras then overcame Jaden, before Kirby played it super smart and destroyed Viola and then Charles and Ray tried for the same strategy, well, after Ray was adorable and chatty with Charles about video games. Oh but Ray wasn’t just iconic and adorbs, he was also the hero, as he secured the win for the Rebels.
They arrived at the party and immediately started smashing all the snacks in sight, before Sarah thanked everyone for holding space for her when she was struggling in the morning. And for dominating in the challenge and scoring her an actual birthday party. Everyone congratulated Ray for being a hero in the challenge, before they found photos from home and completely got distracted. Kirby opened up about her family growing up, Garrick was adorbs dressed as batman, Sarah spoke about her and her dad’s beach trips before Kelli dried her tears long enough to open up about her family. We powered through pretty quickly, so the cliffsnotes are that Aileen grew up in Nepal and Feras has not changed in 30 years. After letting their guards down and opening up, Feras asked if anyone has any ideas who they should give the key to on the Titans tribe, with him wanting to cause as much chaos as possible. While Kirby admitted to us that Feras’ power scares her and while they are close, she knows she needs to stay one step ahead of him, lest she want to be blindsided.
Everyone reunited with Jonathan for an epic obstacle course immunity challenge where they have to race to chop through a log to release planks, go up and over a tower, use the planks to build a bridge, solve a hanging plank puzzle and then use coconuts to knock off the puzzle. After begging to participate all through the reward, Kelli was firm that she wanted to be part of a heroic section of the challenge. But to get there, Jaden and Alex had to absolutely demolish their logs. Obviously Jaden got the Titans out to a small lead, though the Rebels were hot on their heels building the first ladder. The Rebels started to pull out in front until Kelli hit the bridge and slowed everyone down, leaving the tribe to grow angrier and angrier about her existence. The Titans quickly solved their puzzle, and to quote Jonathan, Nathan busted nut after nut, as he secured another immunity for the Titans. As Garrick fumed about needing Kelli gone immediately.
Back at camp it was hard for everyone to hide their rage at Kelli as they lamented about the loss. As she went for a swim with Kirby, everyone straight up talked shit about her decision making skills and the fact she won’t even admit she was wrong. While Kirby tried to get through to her and make her see that she let the tribe down. As everyone locked in the easy Kelli vote, Kirby assured her that she does feel like Kelli is useful to her game. That is, if she promises to vote with her. Kelli tried to join up with everyone at the well, with them all wandering off to find Kirby instead. Scott and Alex tried to point out that Kelli needs to go, with her straight up refusing, given she isn’t a threat and is disposable each and every week and instead, she’d like to get rid of Feras. And while the boys pretended they were on board, their faces say they are ready to get rid of Kelli and to get back to winning. While Alex just wanted to stick with the numbers.
Feras and Garrick meanwhile were catching up in the shelter, hoping that Kirby will remain loyal and they will be able to finally get rid of Kelli. Alex joined them to try and discuss the plan before Kelli followed and sighed in their general vicinity. As they walked away from her, she found the girls with everyone locking in the vote for Feras. As Alex approached Garrick and Feras to confirm their plans, Kirby sent Kelli over to annoy them. Leaving Alex mere seconds to blurt out the plan to blindside him.
Obviously this infuriated Feras who was hurt by the fact Kirby was gunning for him, despite the fact he trusted her. The boys then floated the idea of getting rid of Rianna instead, to leave Kirby all by her lonesome. And I assume, because she is making silly decisions in challenges like Kelli. Feras and Garrick split up to float the idea and find their six votes, with Feras hoping to flip Aileen and Scott to vote with them. Scott continued to have a breakout episode, happily agreeing to get rid of Rianna, given he is close to Kirby and getting rid of Ri leaves Kirby alone to ride with him. Which is smart.
At tribal council Kirby spoke about the importance of people being in the right position in challenges if they want to avoid coming back to tribal council. With Alex barely hiding his disdain for Kelli bombing the challenge. She in turn tried to say that he sucked chopping the wood – which he didn’t, sorry – before Garrick cut in and told them how draining their feud is. JLP then announced that the tribal council will play out a little bit differently tonight, as instead of voting to send someone home, they will be sending someone to the Titans as a saboteur. Immediately making Kirby question her plans, given Feras has the key and sending him to the Titans is handing him even more power. JLP outlined that all the saboteur would have to do is bomb the next immunity challenge and send them back to tribal council. If they succeed, they come back to the Rebels. But if the Titans win the next immunity challenge, they stay on the other tribe.
Scott pointed out that it sounds like the perfect job for Kelli, while she suggested that Feras makes much more sense. Feras admitted he would be happy to go, knowing full well he can unlock the treasure. Feras and Kelli both tried to pitch Feras to go, with Kirby desperately – and obviously – getting her to offer herself up. Kirby grew so anxious about Feras going, she almost offered herself, before admitting that she just doesn’t trust what Feras would do when he makes it to the over tribe. Kirby spiralled more and more, as Kelli panicked about doing it, leading to Scott stepping in and calmly pointing out there is no way she would fail, so it is minimal risk. Which I guess we will find out, as the tribe voted and unanimously sent her to join the Titans as a saboteur. Well, after Alex gleefully pointed out that Kelli is good at everything and is a physical powerhouse and as such, there is no way she could possibly fail.
We followed Kelli over to the Titans tribe where Kelli delighted in waking everyone up, which they, obviously, hated. Winna thought they were under attack before realising they have a new tribe member who literally dove into the shelter. She then told tales about how she was in a beautiful alliance, but then added she was voted out unanimously, which obviously had both Mark and Eden realising it was all bullshit. While Kelli, bless, assumed that once again, she was doing a stellar job.
The next morning over at the Rebels, they were rested and recharged after a quiet Kelli free night. Alex was overjoyed and positively buzzing, as they reflected on how harmonious things now were. Kirby meanwhile was a little nervous, realising that the twist at tribal council ruined the potential blindside and as such, Feras knows he can’t trust her. As Kirby was debriefing with Scott, he shared that Feras had thrown out Ri for the last tribal council, making her feel even more heat. Scott went and looped in Ri, and pointed out they needed to come up with a plan ASAP. You know, aside from Kirby’s repeated get rid of Feras.
We checked in with Titans where Winna and Nathan were ogling Jaden’s ripped bod before they ventured back to camp to learn more about Kelli. And quickly realised that despite them being on the bottom of the Titans tribe, Kelli has bought them one more round, given she is the obvious target should they return to tribal council. Charles and Eden then questioned her about the treasure, with her being very vague about the note – probably genuinely – before spilling that there is likely an idol inside. In a panic, Mark and Viola made a run for it to try and find the box and rather than wait for the key, Mark literally tore the box open and jagged it. And after quickly celebrating, found Valeria to fill her in. Oh and Valeria reiterated that she does not trust Caroline. At all. Even a little bit, which is an iconic feud that I never knew I needed.
The tribes reunited with Jonathan for the latest reward challenge where they would perch between two frames in duos back to back, standing on small footholds, with the last pair standing winning their tribe a glorious coffee and toastie reward. Almost instantly, Garrick and Ray dropped for the Rebels, followed by Jaden and Nathan at the Titans. Tragically the Vs couldn’t get it together and were the next to go, followed by Kelli and Caroline, leaving Charles and Kitty to carry the hopes of the Titans on their literal back. After ten minutes, the remaining pairs stepped down to a smaller foothold and were all still going after twenty minutes, when they had to go to tiny ones. Which saw Sarah and Kirby drop instantly, followed by Charles and Kitty, handing the Rebels yet another reward.
Arriving back at camp, the Rebels were delighted to see the sheer bounty of food and coffee waiting by the fire. Everyone got to work smashing sandwich after sandwich, while Feras kept his eyes firmly on Kirby. Who was busy talking to Scott and Rianna about how best to move forward. Feras then turned his attention to idol hunting, pulling Ray aside to assist, as everyone else made coffee. And while Feras literally had his hand on the idol multiple times before realising it, he eventually spotted it and popped it in his pocket for safe keeping. Not wanting to use it to just save himself once, Feras caught up with Alex to let him know about the idol, followed by Scott, hoping that it would spread like wildfire and buy him even more time.
Things were decidedly less exciting over at the Titans, as Caroline was heartbroken to have missed out on reward. And kinda, sorta became the food tyrant of the tribe, yelling at the boys for eating too much. So now it is Winna and Nathan, and the Vs that hate Caroline. In turn, she was ready to get rid of Nathan ASAP to guarantee they have as much food for everyone as possible. Oh and in Kelli updates, she was vibing on all the conversations she was having with the Titans and was questioning whether throwing the challenge is really the right move for her game. Which is the most Kelli thing that Kelli has said in six episodes.
JLP made his triumphant return for the next immunity challenge where the tribes would race to untangle rope to release paddles, paddle out to collect blocks and then use the blocks to solve a word puzzle. While the rest of the tribe held up a platform on which it would be solved. Oh and despite needing to sabotage the challenge, now was the time for Kelli to choose to sit out. Rebels were first to unlock their chest as the Titans nipped at their heels. They continued to power through the water until they did a little loop, though still managed to make it to shore with a decent lead. Which evaporated, given it is a puzzle and Jaden is ripped. Aileen though made quick work of the puzzle and they managed to spell it, lower their platform with ease and save themselves from tribal council. While Kelli watched on like she had saved herself, despite not doing her job as saboteur. Which, again, is classic Kelli.
Back at camp Kelli admitted to us that she sat out of the immunity challenge because she loves the Titans and just couldn’t bear the thought of sabotaging them. Caroline caught up with Kitty and pushed to get rid of Nathan, given he is literally eating them out of house and home. They quickly pulled in Mark and got to work orchestrating a split between Jaden and Nathan. They looped everyone in, before Winna approached them at the well, with Viola letting him know the plan was to get rid of Nathan. And while he said he thought he could get Jaden onboard, he appeared to be wavering. Eden sensed something was up, asking if he was sure he could turn on them. With him assuring Eden he was fine with it. Everyone quickly got in on the plan, with Winna telling Nathan the plan was instead Kelli.
Mark approached Viola to see whether she believed it was a good idea to go with the safe Nathan vote, or whether it was time to make a move against the middle aged mafia and get rid of Caroline instead. Given she is rubbing everyone the wrong way. Nathan meanwhile admitted to Jaden that he felt like the tribe was primed to blindside him, proving he has a pretty solid read on things. As everyone came together by the fire for dinner, Caroline continued to sass people for eating too much. Viola then got to work throwing out her name as another option, quickly getting the boys on board. After she left, Winna suggested that maybe this is all a ploy to confuse them as Nathan tried to keep him calm. And Jaden looked forward to fireworks at tribal council. Nathan caught up with Kelli by the fire, as the Vs and Mark circled back to confirm Caroline is an option. Though worried if they can really trust the boys to vote with them.
At tribal council Eden spoke about how sending Kelli to the Titans was wise for the Rebels, given she is both open and friendly. Mark questioned whether she was a spy before JLP and Kelli admitted that she was in fact sent over as a saboteur and since they lost immunity – albeit through no work from Kelli – she would be returning to the Rebels, as she held back tears.
Immediately moving on, Nathan spoke about how he has spent the game playing catch-up after not making the right relationships at the start. Eden spoke about how not everyone is aware they could be in trouble, while Valeria suggested they needed to be cautious every single time. Caroline spoke about feeling mildly confident that she is on the right side of the vote, while Kitty suggested that everyone that matters knows the plan, as Jaden laughed about needing to talk to people. Despite laughing it off and trying to act like he was out of the loop, Kitty told him to just hold firm and stick to the plan. And when JLP pointed out that he just said he wasn’t across it, she cut him down and assured him that Jaden was across it. With that the tribe voted and despite the potential excitement, Nathan was shown the door. Tragically, alongside his speedos.
Nathan followed my wailing sobs all the way to Loser Lodge, where I quickly ran into his ripped arms for a hug. He held me as I cried for about 30 minutes, as I sobbed about only having Alex’s speedos left in the game. Despite being arrogant in the first couple of episodes, Nathan is also super kind as he assured me that while his speedos may be gone, I will always have the memory of them. And honestly, that line alone is enough for me to lobby 10 to pop him on the next All Stars. Until then, however, I had to settle with slurping down a big, thick jug of his Nathan Freematriciana Sauce.
Rich, lightly salted and packing a little heat, amatriciana sauce may not be the most famous out of Italy, but it is one of the best. Better still, it is so quick and easy, it is the perfect solution when you don’t know what you want for dinner.
Enjoy!
Nathan Freematriciana Sauce Serves: 4.
Ingredients 1 tbsp olive oil 1 onion, diced 200g pancetta, diced 1 tsp chilli flakes 5 garlic cloves, minced 800g can diced tomatoes ¼ cup parsley, roughly chopped kosher salt and pepper, to taste
Method Pop the oil in a deep skillet over medium heat and cook the onion, pancetta, chilli and garlic for five minutes, stirring frequently. Or until the onion is soft and sweet. Add the tomato paste and cook off for a minute before stirring through the tin tomatoes. Bring to the boil, reduce to a simmer and cook for 10 minutes, or until it comes together. Add the parsley and season to taste.
Serve with your favourite pasta with a generous helping of parmesan, obvi.
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Previously on Survivor the final pre-merge journey continued to loom over the season as Austin smarted over being robbed of a sandwich by J. Maya and Kellie, who wanted advantages. We were also reminded that Bruce found an idol, just before leaving Lulu beach. Which came into play in the present, as Kellie was worried about Bruce’s idol potentially leading to her copping strays, given he was telling everyone they were tightly aligned. Everyone wanted to lock in a Bruce blindside however he won immunity, which quickly led to everyone flipping to take out Jake instead. Given this is new era Survivor, however, the Rebas chose they couldn’t trust Jake to not have a bag of tricks and flipped the vote to Kellie instead. And she was angry. While Austin now had a second idol.
Back at camp Kendra was heartbroken to be without her bestie (not Bruce’s), sadly cheersing the dark sea all alone. While by the shelter Jake was loudly celebrating and laughing about still being in the game. Despite the joy, he realised he had zero idea what was going on at camp and knew he needed to pivot. Hard. Bruce meanwhile was salty about his closest ally being taken out, assuming it meant he was the original target. The Rebas, however, told him the actual (fake) reason they booted her is because she actually wanted to take out Bruce. Dee and Austin explained that she felt he was overbearing and TBH, you could see the exact moment his heart broke. Katurah and Kendra meanwhile were heartbroken to have lost their actual bestie, though Kendra realised Kellie was a threat and would also vote for her if she makes it to the end, so she wasn’t that mad. Though she was now keen to come for Dee. Katurah took this information to the Rebas in the hope she could be pulled into their alliance, with everyone now trying to decide if Jake or Kendra is the best person to target while flushing Bruce’s idol.
The next day Bruce was still hurt by the news Kellie was after him as he sat on the beach. He returned to camp, dejected, quietly sulking by the fire as everyone tried to bring him in. He then spoke about his fear that he is overbearing with his daughter and ugh, this is actually really hard to watch, as that comment really seems to have broken him. And just like that, I love Bruce. Particularly knowing he is energetic and upbeat because he grew up in the foster care system where he always had to adapt and be positive. Drew meanwhile picked up on his energy and just decided reality got to him. Which we now know is not a nuanced read. Emily pulled Drew and Austin aside to float the idea of getting rid of Dee, just to see whether their three person alliance is the priority. However, seeing how quickly they cut it down, I think she is ready to make a move elsewhere. Despite how hard Austin tried to sell Dee as the ultimate meatshield for them.
Drew went off to collect treemail asking everyone to split into trios for the upcoming immunity challenge, though were assured only one person would win immunity. With no context about why they are trios, Dee, Drew and Jake formed one, Austin, Emily and Katurah another leaving Kendra, Julie and Bruce together. Filling Julie with dread, since she is an obvious target if just three go to tribal council, leading to Austin handing over an idol.
After they met up with Probst, they got the good news that it would still be a nine person tribal council and that their teams would just be for the first two stages of the challenge. First one being they have to retrieve discs and balance a ball on it as they walk a balance beam before digging rope rungs, last group being eliminated. Second one, they’d use the rungs to form a ladder and land three balls on small rings, the last group, again, eliminated while the final three have to balance plates against discs, with the last one standing winning immunity. Oh and the winning trio would get to go to the Sanctuary to smash a roast chicken. And the first group eliminated will also lose their vote at tribal council, though they could win theirs back on a journey.
And again, stop with the twists as there could have been a blindside with nine votes in play.
Dee, Drew and Jake got out to an early lead on round one before Jake struggled on the balance beam and put them squarely in last place. The other groups powered ahead until Bruce struggled, leaving Emily, Austin and Katurah to start digging their rungs solo. Everyone caught up as Dee, Drew and Jake powered through and made it to round two first, followed by Julie singlehanded getting her team over the line, forcing Emily, Austin and Katurah to lose their votes. While Dee, Drew and Jake got out to an early lead in round two, Bruce, Julie and Kendra made quick work of the baskets and overtook them and made it through to the final round. The trio lined up with the discs, with all of them wobbling almost instantly. After an epic struggle, Kendra eventually dropped as Bruce and Julie faced off yet again before the latter tragically dropped and handed Bruce immunity. Again.
We followed the mids back to camp where Jake, Drew and Dee opted to avoid strategising before they have information about who will actually be voting and as such, made themselves a big pot of rice. As Jake went for a wander, Dee and Drew portioned up the rice and giddily took extra, while talking about the plan ahead. With surprise, surprise, Dee wanting to get rid of Kendra. Oh and then they realised they didn’t save Jake any rice, so instead let him eat the stuff burnt on to the bottom of the pan.
Over at the Sanctuary the trio were feeling good as they smashed the chicken and kikied, with Kendra admitting she is nervous about the vote ahead. Julie lied about being on the bottom of the Reba alliance, as Kendra floated the idea of getting rid of Dee to break up her and Austin, despite the fact she believes they are in love and wants them to get married. Julie threw out Jake as an option instead and while Kendra loved hearing anyone but her, Julie was still nervous things wouldn’t play out her way and she wouldn’t be able to get her revenge.
We finally checked in with the losers on their journey as they trekked to the top of the mountain and learnt that to win their votes back, they would have to do a maths problem. And while I thought they would all be able to slay it, Emily and Katurah crumbled under the pressure while Austin jagged his vote back at the very last moment.
Drew and Jake were talking about the confusion about the vote ahead as the groups came together back at camp. The losers announced that only none of them earned their vote back before Austin pulled his allies aside to assure them it was a lie and as such, he actually has a vote and they, a majority. So they can power ahead with a vote to get rid of Kendra. Only Julie filled them in on the fact the Sanctuary people agreed to get rid of Jake and since it was better for her game, that is what she wanted to do. Kendra meanwhile was spiralling, going to Emily to let her know that Jake was the plan tonight and when she agreed it made sense, Kendra felt great. Sadly when Drew caught up with Emily she learnt it wasn’t the case and that Kendra is actually the target. And given Dee was the one to come up with it, there were more red flags for Emily.
At tribal council Kendra spoke about how heartbroken she was to lose Kellie at the last tribal council as Kellie held back tears, Kaleb holding her hands. Dee spoke about how tough it is to play the game, given you are playing with people’s lives. Jake spoke about the shock, given he assumed to be going home and while he survived, he does hate that he is clearly at the bottom. Talk turned to Julie and Bruce being the challenge beasts, though Julie added that she would like to actually jag the win. Bruce then spoke about winning back-to-back immunities and the risk it makes him a target. Talk turned to the vote losers with Drew talking about how difficult it is to figure out a plan tonight, given they aren’t exactly sure who is voting. That made Kendra get paranoid, not realising people may have lied about getting their votes back. While Jake was just looking for a friend and willing to be used, given he is one of the guaranteed votes.
With that the tribe voted – Austin very speedily – before Kendra was gagged to be blindsided. While Jake was once again surprised to survive, almost becoming a bit of a lol that he keeps being dragged along through now power of his own. But enough about Jake, this is about the second coming of Drew Barrymore, our queen, Kendra. As she arrived at Ponderosa, I pulled her in for a massive hug and thanked her for being such a glorious bright point of the season. She was not just a light spirit, she was also a fun, quirky character and so exceedingly watchable. And I look forward to her second season. So wheeled out a vat of Kendra McQucranberrie Sauce to fuel our planning session.
Sweet, tart and spicy, this glorious sauce has it all and while it is traditionally a sauce associated with Thanksgiving, it is something you will come round year round.
Enjoy!
Kendra McQucranberrie Sauce Serves: 8.
Ingredients 100g muscovado sugar 100ml freshly squeezed orange juice, and zest from the associated oranges 250g frozen cranberries 1 tsp cinnamon ¼ tsp allspice a pinch of ground nutmeg
Method Combine the sugar, orange juice and zest in a pan and bring to the boil. Once the sugar has dissolved, stir in the cranberries and simmer for 5 minutes, or until tender. Stir in the spices and cook for another couple of minutes to infuse.
Remove from the heat and allow to cool for a little before transferring to steralised jars, closing and leaving to cool completely. Then devour.
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Previously on Drag Race France the top five were thrilled to learn they’d be competing in the famed Girl Groups challenge. That is until they learnt that they would be facing off against the eliminated queens, with the best of their fallen sisters battling against the worst of the top five for a chance to return. As such, the dolls gave it their absolute all, working as one and straight up proving just why they made it to the end. That being said, Sara slayed and as such scored her third win of the season. Piche meanwhile, absolutely dominated from the eliminated queens and faced off against Cookie in the lip sync. And used that fire to demolish the lip sync and return to the competition, sending Cookie out in her place.
Backstage Piche tried to hide her jubilation as everyone sadly paid their respects to sweet Cookie. Eventually talk turned to Piche’s return and while the rest of the dolls felt like it was odd and a disappointing way for Cookie to go, Mother Keiona did assure Piche that she was happy for Piche to get another shot at the crown. Because, trust, if she was eliminated she would want another shot.
The next day the dolls were trying to sell the Werk Room to prospective buyers – Down Under, it’s a good space! – before everyone praised Sara on her third win. She meanwhile was just thrilled to be on the up again after a string of bottoms, which is something Piche obviously related to. The clock struck Cocorico as Nicky arrived to pop them through a Weakest Link mini challenge, hosted by the iconique Lova Ladiva. After five minutes to beat their mugs, the dolls ventured to set and well, they were stupid and oh so fun. Though Punani, obviously, stole the show, shouting out her fake sons and living her best life. Sadly though, it was treated like an actual quiz show, so her charm meant nothing and Ms. Mami Watta proved unstoppable as she snatched the win.
But that means nothing because for this week’s maxi challenge the dolls would be making over rugby players and swoon, my basement is flooded. As were the queens’, though they seemed to be more excited about having new sisters. For winning the mini challenge though, Mami was able to pair the queens taking the zaddiest for herself, giving the bearded zaddy Ryan to Piche, François went to Sara, a lovely man called Ludovic to Kieona leaving Florent for Punani and TBH, it was super fair, as everyone kinda looked like a perfect match.
After Nicky departed the dolls got to know their rugby players with Mami gagged to learn she paired herself with a straight. Though he loved the show thanks to her wife, so that is not nothing, I guess. And hearing him talk about being the Maddy Morphosis of France, essentially, has me delighted. Sara’s player meanwhile was excited to show inclusivity by participating and hoped to make his kids proud, and ugh, like Sara, I am already crying. Keiona meanwhile was lucky to get a gay guy, though he was scared to get rid of his beard while Piche and her player were just vibing and living their best lives. As were Punani and her zaddy, given they are just sweeties. I mean, he practised walking in heels at home to help the process. Sadly though, it didn’t appear to give him much of an advantage as the dolls raced their daughters and he lost.
We then did a hard pivot to a supercut of the dolls shaving their players – except Piche, obviously – before they beated their mugs and bonded even further. Punani’s player, like Sara’s, was thrilled to set an example for his kids and hoped his appearance would contribute to a better world in some way. It then led to Piche opening up about being kicked out of home at 13 after her boyfriend outed her to her parents and seeing everyone, including the rugby players, rally around to comfort her was just beautiful to see. As beautiful as the rugby players felt when they saw themselves in drag for the first time. Because they were all gagged.
Nicky, Daphne and Kiddy were joined on the panel by Nicolas Huchard et La Zarra as Piche and Christabiche fought to be the star of the ball and well, looked a million bucks. Despite being modelled on Cinderella’s ugly step sisters. Mami Watta and Queen Mera went from grannies to glamazonian dominatrixes, and well, swoon. Punani and Lovali were absolute camp delights while Keiona and Lola were pretty in purple, before Sara stole the show with her new sister Divina serving Ed and Pats and yeah, give her her fourth win, I guess. Because it was absolute perfection. Per. Fec. Tion.
Christerbiche was absolutely beloved for looking stunning, though Piche was read for the ill fitting outfits. Queen Mera too was praised for her energy, with Mami in turn was read for not finessing the details. Punani and Lovali were praised for the camp, though read for the outfit falling off Lovali. As Lovali sweetly tried to take the fall for Punani, like an icon. Keiona once again received universal praise before Sara was almost handed the win then and there just for being an absolute star.
Backstage the vibe was upbeat as the dolls bonded further. Well except for Mami, who was worried she was in the bottom. Punani on the other hand was hoping to avoid the bottom, despite the fit issues of the dresses. Oh and then they did a group cocorico. Which is important.
Before getting to the results, the dolls were asked why they should go through to the finale, with Piche sharing she was ready to prove herself. Mami wanted to teach others to dream big, Punani was proud of her growth and ready to cap it off with that win, Keiona was thrilled to take risks and prove she can still grow while Sara was proud of being able to grow to love herself and that she deserves it.
Ultimately, the judges agreed with that as she snatched her fourth win and made her way directly through to the finale. Keiona was next to book her ticket – as she deserves – followed by Mami Watta, leaving Punani and Piche to battle for the final spot. As soon as the lip sync kicked off – to Une femme avec une femme by Mecano, which tragically reminded me we didn’t have any licensing issues this year – it was clear this was Punani’s to lose as she felt all the emotions and channelled her fire for the crown to knock it out of the park. And ultimately book her spot in the finale, sending Piche out the door one final time.
Given we had already dabbled in comfort, I gave Piche a hug and sent her on her way before pulling Punani aside for a bit of a pre-finale perk up. Why Punani you ask? Well, since the other dolls track records were iconic in their own ways – no tops or bottoms for Mami, 4 wins and some lows for Sara and never lower than second for Mother Keiona – I figured Punani deserved it for her more classic trajectory of highs and lows. Which she was ok with, given a pre-finale advantage is a pre-finale advantage. And when it comes in the form of a vat of Punanilini Bean Dip, how could she be disappointed?
Earthy and lightly spiced, this easy dip is so warming and nourishing, it will have you coming back for more. Better still, it is pretty damn healthy, so you don’t even have to contend with guilt.
Enjoy!
Punanilini Bean Dip Serves: 6.
Ingredients 400g can cannellini beans, drained and rinsed 1 lemon, zested and juiced 2 tbsp olive oil 3 garlic cloves, minced 2 tbsp chargrilled capsicum, drained 2 tbsp fresh flat-leaf parsley, roughly chopped salt and pepper, to taste
Method Pop everything in a food processor and blitz until smooth. Season to taste.
Decant into a small bowl and devour, with your fave crackers.
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Previously on All Stars, way way back at the start of the season, Ru announced that like last year – yas Mama Raja! – there would be a secondary way to win the season. This time, the eliminated queens would be battling it out in the online Fame Games, designed to reward the queen with the best runways. After they were felled one-by-one – Heidi via quitting, making her ineligible – Jessica, Kandy and Jimbo completed makeovers where Kandy slayed and had sole power to decide who she faced off against for the crown. Ultimately choosing not to further anger the fandom against her by taking frontrunner winner to the end, and instead sending the iconic fan-favourite Jessica to the Fame Games. And ideally, guaranteed her the win.
Backstage Jimbo and Kandy were giddy to have landed in the top two, Jimbo in particular, given Kandy kept up their agreement despite her being the bigger threat. After Jimbo did another pointless count since Priyanka had already pulled out all the lipsticks, she admitted that she had truly started to worry about Kandy eliminating her. Kandy meanwhile was thrilled to make it to the top two again, though shocked that they still have an episode left to compete in which is a total gag-a-tondra. Oh and then they had a faux fight for the crown.
The next day the duo were still feeling their oats and trying best to serve us an episode despite it just being the two of them. Well, until Ru dropped by to announce that this week, there won’t actually be a maxi challenge for them to compete in. Instead, the eliminated dolls would be returning starting with Monica, Naysha, MKD – yep, this is happening – Darienne, Jaymes, Kahanna, Lala, Alexis and thankfully, sweet Jessica.
Well, after Ru pretended they’d be picking the winner.
But first, they must read each other for filth. Jessica called out Alexis for crying and Lala for having terrible clothes before Alexis just tried to fuck Lala. She in turn was delightfully brutal, Kahanna was there, Jaymes went in for the kill – I live for her read about, MKD being the only drag story hour children protest – while Darienne and MKD were perfection, Naysha tried her best and Monica was adorable and cute. Kandy then stepped up and completely annihilated, before Jimbo was stunning, stupid and so fun. But there was no way anyone was beating MKD, as she slayed. Oh and the dolls were not there for just a reading challenge. Instead they’d be showing off their skills by starring in The Fame Games Variety Extravaganza. Oh and the top two will serve as hosts and maybe show off a little talent in the process.
Everyone wheeled their suitcases back in and the dolls started to kiki and giggle, while Darienne focused on charming us, the audience. Ru came back to talk to her daughters with Monica, Naysha and MKD thrilled to be back for another chance to take out a win. MKD via rap. Naysha will be dancing while Monica will be lip syncing to her debut single. They traded out with the next three out, with Kahanna cheering to her original song while Darienne will be doing something different, by doing stand up. Oh and Jaymes will be singing and dancing about not having talent. When the last three dropped by, Alexis shared she’d be giving Broadway, Lala will be doing a production to an original song while Jessica will hair flip.
Oh and before departing, Ru announced that the top two in the talent show would be lip syncing for the challenge win, with the victor getting the chance to multiple their Fame Game fan vote via the spin of a wheel. Which is a massive advantage. Or disadvantage, if it rallies people like me behind their favourite and avoid voting for someone else they love. Aka all my votes are going to Jessica, ok?!
After Ru departed the dolls split up to kiki and beat their mugs and damn they were sweet. Alexis is still needy and sweet on Lala, pulling her aside to apologise and surprisingly, not break down in tears. Lala then wandered the crowd and delighted her sisters, while Kandy was glad to not have the pressure of competing. Despite knowing she still needs to do well, given the judges will be watching and there is a crown to fight for next week. Though she looks forward to reading the dolls if they fumble.
Ru, Michelle and the hilarious Ross Mathews were joined on the panel by the icon herself Ego Nwodim as Jimbo and Kandy took to the stage to open the show. As each other and ugh, it was cute and iconic. When it came to the actual performances, first up was Monica Beverly Hillz giving all the energy and was so cute. Naysha got her star moment serving a sultry flamenco number before MKD rapped the house down and Darienne had us all in stitches. And grateful she did something other than a song, standing out in all the right ways. Jaymes was delightful and demented as she showed off her knockers, Kahanna flipped around the stage and absolutely slayed before Lala stole the damn show with a killer song and a wind machine. Alexis’ Broadway number was vampy and cute before Jessica demolished because she is the best and knows how to turn a show, obviously.
The top two then opted to show off their talents, with Jimbo sticking with food, making a sundae to The Final Countdown and like the bologna clown, it was so stupid it was perfection. While Kandy joined the sea of original songs, though let’s be honest it was a bop and you can tell why she made it to the end again.
Kandy and Jimbo were sent backstage to untuck as the judges lavished Monica with praise for showing off her skillz. Naysha was praised for giving such a technical performance with a whole lot of heart. MKD’s performance would have been beloved for no other reason than its message, Darienne was praised for knocking stand-up out of the park, while Jaymes was absolutely beloved for being stupid and making everyone have fun. Kahanna was praised for her mad cheer skills and for doing it with a tuck, Lala rightly got all the flowers for stealing the show while Alexis was praised for singing live and Jessica, rightly, was loved for killing everything but herself on the stage, despite how fast she was whipping her neck around the stage.
Backstage Jimbo and Kandy were thrilled to be able to chill out backstage while their sisters sweated it out on stage. They speculated that Lala would definitely be in top but weren’t sure who would be joining her given Jessica, Naysha and Jaymes were all good. Jimbo tried to get shady, asking whose performance Kandy would want to erase from her mind and never watch ever again. Sadly before we got an answer, the eliminated queens arrived and seeing them all vibe over their positive critiques was just lovely and I’m so happy for all of the dolls.
We then got a supercut off all the runways before Ego dropped by and ugh, I love her too.
Ultimately it was Jaymes who finished in the top two with Lala and while I thought the latter was going to demolish the lip sync, as soon as Gaga and Ariana’s Rain On Me kicked off, it was clear Jaymes wanted those extra votes. Of course Lala gave the full experience, while Jaymes was giving Lala her own experience. It was so fun that both Jaymes and Lala were deemed the winner and as such, both of them jagged a spin of the wheel with Jaymes getting to double her numbers while Lala got lucky and would be tripling hers.
As they celebrated, I snuck up behind Kandy, tapped her on the shoulder and asked her to come with me to toast her run. Which obviously didn’t go down well, given Kandy pointed out she is still in the running and as such, Jimbo could go first. Plus, I don’t have star quality, or something like that. After things escalated and then calmed down, I pointed out that the only fair way to do things – like last season – was on track record and TBH, the winner’s post generally gets less traffic as it is post season. And knowing she would win the number somewhere, gladly joined me backstage to smash a Mexicandy Dip Muse.
Not quite a queso yet not a famed seven layer dip, this mash-up is nearly as flawless of the iconic Miss Muse. Spicy, creamy and packed full of flavour, it has star quality and is perfect for a two time top-two finisher.
Enjoy!
Mexicandy Dip Muse Serves: 6.
Ingredients 1 ½ cup sour cream ½ cup salsa, store bought not Salsa Struthers, in this instance only ½ cup black beans, lightly mashed 2 tsp dried parsley 1 tsp dried Mexican oregano 1 tsp chilli powder ½ tsp garlic powder ½ tsp onion powder ½ tsp kosher salt ½ cup Mexican cheese, shredded Tortéa Leoni Chips, for dippin’
Method Pop everything in a bowl – excluding the chips, obviously – and stir to combine.
Then serve and devour, like an icon.
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Previously on Survivor the dwindling yet iconic Tika tribe tried to rally after Josh idolled Sarah out of the game. Despite Yam Yam being the only person blindsided in the process, he tried to make amends with Carolyn and Josh, and enjoy their time. Josh meanwhile tried to pretend he found another immunity idol, though sadly for him the beads from treemail fell apart in Yam Yam’s hands as Carolyn realised he was also using the exact same note from the first idol. After losing the latest immunity challenge, Carolyn had an awkward journey-feast with Brandon and Danny which made her realise that the alphas were banding together and as such, targeting Josh was the smartest move. Thankfully for him, however, there was no tribal council at all as Matthew’s shoulder felled him from the game.
The next day the Tika trio were nonchalant about avoiding certain doom as Yam Yam and Carolyn debated the pronunciation of bag – or is it baeg? – just like my mother. Josh meanwhile was thrilled to still be alive in the game, though well and truly ready for some new company. Right on cue, we dropped by Soka where the tribe read treemail advising them to drop their buffs, pack up their belongings and bounce. Tika too were told to pack, while Ratu was thrilled to learn that the non-merge (and then I assume real merge) will take place on their beach, meaning they could just chill. Carson meanwhile was ready for some chaos before pointing out that the wording of the note means they haven’t merged, but does confirm his idol is powerless. As such, he announced that he had one, leading to Lauren sharing the fact that she has an extra vote. For reasons.
Soka and Tika arrived and everyone did some casual getting to know you, while Kane was just nervous about where he stands and how exactly things will play out in the larger group. Josh meanwhile was thrilled to be away from Yam Yam and Carolyn, unaware that Carolyn had spread information about his idols to Brandon during their journey and for some reason, he lied and told him that he does in fact have one. After he caught up with Jamie and told her the truth about being down to a fake idol only, she caught up with Heidi and Frannie to talk about his idols or lack thereof, with Jamie confident he does have an idol, despite her being the only person he told the truth to. Confused? Same!
The group came together at camp to talk about the pre-merge phase with Josh being a little extra about Yam Yam turning on him, despite the fact they were on opposite sides of the vote and there was no real betrayal. Feeling nervous, Yam Yam started to make new friends, catching up with Matt who assured him everyone doesn’t hate him and instead Josh was meant to go at their next tribal council on Soka, and to him, he is still the next target. After Yam Yam explained that Carolyn is being super quiet at the moment, we ventured back to camp where Carolyn admitted she was super nervous about keeping her personality in check to get people on her side. Before she went and told them all she loves sweating. Thankfully though, it was quickly brushed over and she was able to lay low as she wanted until it was the right time to reunite Carson.
Speaking of Carson, the right time came about later that night as they caught up on the beach and pledged their undying loyalty to each other. Yam Yam then joined them to lock in a secret trio, agreeing to keep their distance for the next while and come back together to take control later on. Once the big threats have finished cannibalising themselves, that is. Also that night, Matt and Frannie were sleeping next to each other and being cute and flirty and I want them to adopt me. Or at least make me a flowerboy at their wedding.
The tribe came together with Jeffrey for the Earn the Merge challenge – eyeroll, of course – with the tribe split into teams to race to push a massive boulder along a course to collect keys, climb a tower and use the keys to unlock puzzle pieces and solve a puzzle. Oh and in addition to getting buffs and immunity at tribal council, the victors also got a feast. Matt, Frannie, Carolyn, Carson, Brandon and Jamie faced off against Heidi, Danny, Lauren, Yam Yam, Josh and Kane with the latter getting out to an early lead before the other group overtook them on the next two obstacles. They continued to pull away until Danny and Josh pulled everyone from their group up the wall. However, that headstart meant nothing when it came to the puzzle, given Carson had repeatedly studied it before the game and solved it in a matter of minutes. Earning the merge and handing his group a feast.
Back at camp the losers were heartbroken to be starving, while Yam Yam was terrified about being the most likely target. He caught up with Danny and Kane, suggesting they should get rid of Josh next which annoyed Danny, given he didn’t want to make any decisions without the winners present. As he worried about putting his foot in his mouth, Josh was busy locking in Lauren and Heidi to get rid of Yam Yam and while they pretended to be on board, Heidi still felt like Josh was a bigger issue for her game. Idol or not. The victors meanwhile were giddily smashing their food before talk turned to tribal council with everyone happy to get rid of Josh too. That being said, Brandon was worried about the idol and as such, needed to identify a backup, with him more than happy to get rid of Kane for voting for him at the first tribal council. Oh and then Carolyn straight up told them Josh does not have an idol, calmly articulating his entire web of lies yet for some reason, nobody believed her.
Everyone reunited at camp with Jamie worried about how easy the plan to get rid of Josh came together, though was confident in having Kane as a back-up. Frannie meanwhile was assuring Josh that Kane is the target, leading to Josh approaching Yam Yam to bury the hatchet and tell him they should come together to get rid of Kane. And while Yam Yam pretended he was ok with things, he assured us that Josh is far and away his last option. Brandon meanwhile wasn’t overly worried about the Josh plan falling apart, given he has his beef with Kane. Carson meanwhile warned Kane that his name came up at the feast, however Kane in turn stupidly threw Carson under the bus by approaching Brandon to see what happened. And while he calmly admitted he did throw his name out there, he approached Carson to tell him how stupid it was. Oh and then Kane’s nerves got the best of him, approaching Matt and Danny to throw out the idea of changing the vote to Yam Yam. Matt then told Josh he was the target and hot damn, it is a mess and everyone seems confused.
At tribal council Carson spoke about how difficult it was to keep track of what was happening during the scramble, while Kane assured everyone he is operating from a place of trust and will vote based on that. Yam Yam admitted he is at a disadvantage, even more so given he just can’t stop running his mouth. Ever. Josh downplayed his bond with Yam Yam and Carolyn, pointing out he is more Soka strong. Essentially. Talk turned to idols, with Brandon not sure what exactly is going on and who could have them. Carolyn agreed there were a lot of variables to work around, while Heidi felt like it was hard to keep up with the plans, given everyone has their own opinions. Yam Yam admitted he was feeling very nervous and unsure what conversations he could trust, while Matt felt that this non-merge is intense and he honestly doesn’t even know what is meant to be happening tonight. With that the non-tribe voted and no idols – real or fake – were played as they banded together to finally oust Josh from the game.
Obviously Josh was super gutted to have found himself booted before the legit merge and *gay gasp* not on the jury, meaning in the words of the great Kat Edorsson, he is no longer datable. As he arrived at Loser Lodge I pulled him in for a massive hug and assured him that Kat is wrong and any man would be lucky to have him, despite the fact he and Yam Yam couldn’t get it together and run the game with the rest of our queer fam. I congratulated him for doing all that he could in the game, despite essentially being shut out on both of his tribes and toasted his run with a big vat of Joshuarrabbiata Wilder Sauce.
While marinara is the most famous of the tomato based sauces, my heart belongs to its spicy cousin the arrabbiata. A delicate hint of garlic and a kick of chilli work together to provide a complex, rich sauce that elevates any pastas. And is super easy to make, to boot.
Enjoy!
Joshuarrabbiata Wilder Sauce Makes: 2-3 cups.
Ingredients 2 tbsp olive oil 1 onion, diced 4 garlic cloves, minced 3 red chillies, halved, deseeded and roughly chopped 1 tbsp tomato paste 800g canned whole peeled tomatoes 1 tsp raw caster sugar 2 tsp balsamic vinegar salt and pepper, to taste
Method Heat the oil in a frying pan over medium heat and saute the onion and garlic for about five minutes, or until soft and sweet. Add the chillies and tomato paste and cook, stirring, for a further couple of minutes.
Stir in the canned tomatoes and sugar, bring to the boil before reducing heat to low and simmer for about 15 minutes, or until thickened. Stir in the balsamic vinegar and a good whack of salt and vinegar before serving, with your fav pasta. Or if it isn’t about the pasta, pop it in a cup and drink it down.
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Previously on Drag Race UK after the top four slayed the final challenge by putting on an epic show with their eliminated sisters. You know, Just May, Starlet, Copper, Sminty, Baby, Le Fil, Dakota and Pixie! They stomped the runway in Grand Finale Eleganza and despite everyone nailing the assignment, only two were able to continue on in the competition as the four badge queens stuck around, eliminating Jonbers and Peppa to watch on from the back of the stage.
Danny and Cheddar took their places to lip sync for the crown to Dame Shrley Bassey’s This is My Life and well, the entire performance was an absolute slay. Cheddar leant into the emotion, was dainty and ethereal while Danny gave bold, brassy and all the fire to snatch the crown. Both of the queens were in the pocket from start to finish, well and truly proving why this is the strongest top two in any franchise of Drag Race. Ever. And while it should have been a double crowning, sadly Ru opted to stick with only one winner, handing the crown to Danny Beard and relegating Cheddar to the hall of four badge runner-ups alongside the icons Bimini and Ella.
Which honestly, is pretty damn good company.
While Cheddar was disappointed as she found me backstage, she held her head up high reminding me that as she said to Ru and Michelle, she is a star. And the win wouldn’t change that. Which TBH, made me feel a little bit better.
Like many a UK finalist before her Cheddar never really put a foot wrong, giving a collection of perfect runways that always had a message, bringing humour and charm to all that she did and well, to quote Ru, always being so damned polished. As such, I was thrilled to honour her win-worthy run with a big fat bowl of Bacon Cheddar Gorgeous Dip to help dull the disappointment.
This copycat of my favourite dip growing up may not be as classy as Cheds, but it sure as hell is just as delicious. Rich, salty and smacking you in the face with all the flavour, you could eat the entire vat and never regret it.
Ingredients 8 rashers streaky bacon, diced and fried until crisp 4 shallots, sliced 2 cups cheddar cheese, grated 1 cup sour cream 1 cup Shayonnaise Swain ¼ tsp sriracha ½ tsp dijon mustard 1 garlic clove, finely minced small handful parsley, roughly chopped
Method Pop everything in a bowl and stir until well combined. Cover and transfer to the fridge to chill for an hour or so.
Then remove and serve with crackers. Or you know, just devour with a spoon because cheddar truly is gorgeous!
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Previously on Survivor the three tribes came together for not the merge, but the now traditional non-merge-but-earn-your-place-in-the-real-one-a-palooza. Now, thankfully, gloriously hourglass free. After Elie, Owen and Sami were left vulnerable, the Baka’s worked overtime to put the target on Cassidy or James. Though obviously told them to target Cody. Sadly as hard as they worked to get rid of anyone else, Gabler decided to air their dirty laundry at the merge feast and outed Elie for going through his bag earlier in the season (when it was in fact Jeanine). And while she valiantly kicked it into overdrive to save herself, it was all it took to unite the rest of the group against Elie and boot her from the game as the final pre-merger.
Tragically, for my drama loving heart.
We returned to camp where the Gaia Tribe were reeling from what happened at tribal council, specifically Jeanine who was ready to rise from the ashes despite being left out. Noelle pulled her aside and assured her that despite what happened to her closest ally, she is still safe and if her experience with being left out of the Justine vote is anything to go by, it may actually help things. As such Jeanine went person to person, assuring them that there are no hard feelings and she is glad to lose her partner. Though in private, she still kinda just wanted to just cry.
The next day everyone ventured down to the beach for sunrise where Owen and Dwight quietly strategised about how to proceed, with Owen admitting he just doesn’t see himself working with Gabler any more given he is too unpredictable. Speaking of Gabler, he was busy talking to Cody about how chill he feels now that Elie is gone. He explained to us that he planned to continue playing like an ali-gabler. Aka duck back under water to chill until he next needs to strike.
Owen and Dwight continued their double act, collecting treemail which they thought was for art supplies to paint the tribe flag. Instead they learnt that the tribe would need to split into pairs for the upcoming challenge. And how those pairs were formed is completely up to them. While everyone obviously was desperate to get Ryan or Cody though, nobody outright said it and instead they decided to draw rocks.
We quickly pivoted to said epic challenge where Jeffrey confirmed it was for immunity and explained that the pairs would only be pairs for the first two stages of the challenge and after that, it was everyone for themselves. In the first stage, the pairs would race through a tangled net tube before digging up planks and a flag, with the first four back to their mat moving on. For stage two, they would race up a cargo net and cross a rope bridge and race to a mat with the last two pairs moving forward to the final stage, where they would each have to hold a bucket containing 25% of their starting weight. Last one holding the bucket jagging immunity.
Ryan and James were first through their tube followed by Karla and Cassidy. After Ryan and James moved on to the final round, Owen and Gabler and Cody and Dwight joined them, while Karla and Cassidy secured their spot in the next round with the other duos making it to the end as Noelle and Sami, and Jesse and Jeanine were eliminated without even exiting the tube. Before moving on to a new round, Probst gave a speech praising how hard Noelle fought in the challenge and while she was down on herself, seeing Sami and the rest of the tribe rally around her was heartwarming.
We then did a hard pivot as Probst set the second round in motion as Dwight and Cody blitzed through the competition and secured their place in the final round before Owen and Gabler narrowly joined them as the Coco duos dropped as they tried to rush to the finish. The four men took their place holding the buckets for the final round. Almost instantly Dwight dropped out as the other trio shared what was inspiring them before Owen lost concentration and dropped his bucket. Oh and then after 37 minutes of Gabler dedicating minutes to random people – which was far sweeter than I just made it sound – Cody put us out of our misery as he dropped his bucket and handed immunity to Gabler.
Back at camp Gabler opened up how much the veteran community means to him while the rest of the tribe washed the mud of themselves. In the water everyone started scrambling with the Baka and Vesi crew looking to stick together to get rid of James or Ryan. That is until James, Dwight, Owen and Sami went to get water and found a clue in the well, telling them an advantage was hidden under the shelter. While James assured them he wouldn’t take it until after tribal council, he obviously made a beeline for it. Dwight then went and looped Noelle in, who in turn went and told everyone about the advantage, rallying the troops against James.
Jesse and Karla meanwhile were spooked by how quickly Noelle was able to get everyone on side and as such, wanted to weaken her. When Jesse approached Cody about getting rid of Noelle, Cody suggested that getting rid of Dwight would be the better option, given Dwight is better at challenges and has always been sketchy to him. James meanwhile learnt that he had found the Knowledge Is Power advantage, fresh from Geo’s pocket. And rather than keep things quiet, he thought it could help build trust with people and as such, told his potential allies. Who were immediately spooked and started trading out idols and advantages so that he couldn’t snatch them. Jeanine gave her idol to Dwight, Owen scored Noelle’s extra vote and Jesse ended up in possession of Cody’s idol. Meaning everyone was nervous and mildly confused by the end of the day.
At tribal council Karla spoke about how reflective the immunity challenge was of the game, while Jesse felt like today truly levelled up the competition. Dwight spoke about how everyone has kicked in to playing their own game while Noelle felt like they needed a steady stream of plans to make sure they and their allies survive. James spoke about how advantages are only useful when played correctly and as such, people needed to spend less time focussing on them and, instead, just play the game. Cody spoke about surfing at Probst’s request, while most people admitted they were feeling confident they were on the right side of the numbers. Except for Sami who knew that there was always a risk and as such, they just needed to all play balls to the wall. Basically.
With that the tribe voted and despite a solid 7 out of 10 he was sure he was on the right side of the numbers, Dwight was shocked to be voted out of the game. With Jeanine’s idol in his pocket, no less! Despite being crushingly blindsided as the final pre-juror, Dwight was in pretty good form and took his boot like an absolute champion. While he played a low-key game – at least in the edit, given he was on a tribe with Cody – it was clear he was a strong contender, having relationships across all the OG tribes and dare I say it, should he had survived the vote, had what it takes to go all the way. And given that was a super upbeat and nice assessment from me, he was feeling pretty happy with himself and as such, gladly drank a jug of Dwight Moorshroom Gravy to toast his success.
The earthy nuttiness of the mushroom and the punch of wine work perfectly with the cream to form a warm, soulful gravy. Pop it with chicken, steak or maybe even something coming up later this season, and you’re alway left with the same result. An empty plate and a happy belly.
Enjoy!
Dwight Moorshroom Gravy Serves: 4-6.
Ingredients extra virgin olive oil 500g mushrooms, sliced 3 garlic cloves, minced 2 sprigs fresh thyme ½ cup white wine ⅔ cup cream salt and pepper, to taste ¼ cup fresh parsley, roughly chopped
Method Pop a lug of olive oil in a large skillet over high heat and saute for five minutes or until golden, soft and the liquid has reabsorbed. Add the garlic and thyme and cook for a further couple of minutes.
Pour in the wine and leave to bubble up, cooking till it’s almost all absorbed before stirring in the cream. Leave to bubble for a couple of minutes until it slightly thickens before seasoning to taste, alongside the parsley.
Then devour, either pour onto a protein or into a glass. No judgement.
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Previously on Drag Race Down Under the dolls played the Snatch Game and thankfully raised the low bar – outside Anita and Etcetera, obvi – from last season that even famed nice person Bindi Irwin had to rubbish. Continuing in the tradition of celebrated producer Alexis Michelle and Queen of All Queens Jinkx, Hannah slayed with a member of the Garland-Minneli clan. And while Yuri and Spankie were just as good, Minnie was far and away the weakest as Ellen despite the fact she would have killed as her back-up, Jeanne Little. Ultimately Hannah won, while Bev narrowly saved herself after a painfully boring Snatch Game, sending the iconic Minnie home.
Backstage the mood was sombre outside of Bev, who was thrilled to take the title of lip sync assassin after eliminating a second icon. They then discovered that Minnie’s exit message thanked Spankie, Yuri and Kween for being so kind, which obviously pissed off the dolls she called bitches. Essentially. Thankfully Hannah pivoted and said she would cry into her tears, while Spankie was delighted that Minnie did one final pot stir. Talk turned to their track records, where everyone noticed only Bev and Kween were without wins, and while everyone seemingly knew Kween’s victory was inevitable, Bev was also ready to prove herself despite everyone sleeping on her.
The next day Yuri was ready to have fun and be silly, while Beverly reiterated that she is here to prove herself. And did a very long monologue about how hard she will fight. Which led to everyone taking micro-naps, while Yuri summed things up simply by pointing out that Bev had been in the bottom the most and well, that’s just that. Before anyone could pick their jaws up from the floor, Ru dropped by to open the library – or libo, I assume – for the reading challenge. Bev kicked things off very sexual, until Kween read her as not interested. And I love every moment of it. Yuri was so silly and charming, despite hating every moment of it. Molly was hit and miss, but at least it was funny. Kween then arrived and destroyed literally everyone and everything and while I normally just focus on her looks, she is just so fucking good. Spankie did some accurate word association before Hannah closed the show very strongly. But yeah, Kween was the only person that could have won that – she was amazing.
Oh and for this week’s Maxi Challenge, the dolls would be keeping the shade alive as they diss their bandmates on their verses on the new song Bosom Buddies. Then record the song with Michelle before performing them on the mainstage. And well, Bev was ready to shine. Ru then gave them the chance to choose their own groups, with Kween quickly grabbing Hannah and Spankie and well, just like that, it was decided. Leaving the rest as the leftover group. But given Bev was feeling like the dancing diva of Brisbane, she was ready to drag them over the line. Kween, Hannah and Spankie locked in the name BAB’Z – or Bad Ass Bitchez – living for the song, while over with the other dolls, Molly and Bev were worried about how many words Yuri was hoping to spit while dropping the beats.
As BAB’Z were living their best lives, being silly and camp and building their chemistry, Beverly whipped Molly and Yuri into shape learning the choreo. And by choreo, Molly felt like it was a bit of a show choir, asHannah tried to hide her giggles from the other side of the room. While Kween and Spankie just lived for their general dynamic. When Bev, Molly and Yuri asked the other girls to do their choreo live in front of everyone, it led to a delightful blow-up between Kween and Bev as they both triggered each other and went to 1000 with everyone else kinda unsure how it escalated to that point.
BAB’Z were up first to record with Michelle with Hannah delighting as Michelle read her via lyrics, though ultimately slayed. Spankie meanwhile has some damn pipes and nailed every note, while Kween was perfect from start to finish as she channelled that rage from her fight with Bev. The Hung Divas – which is an iconic name, TBH – traded out with Bev giving delightfully ocker rap, with not much sass according to Michelle. Yuri meanwhile was on the struggle bus from start to finish but since I love her, it was charming. And then Molly gave Mr. G vibes as she nailed it in one take only. Much to Bev and Yuri’s nerves.
We cut to rehearsal where Kween was ready to slay as she whipped BAB’Z into shape, giving charm and flips and kicks. And well, when she shared that she was galvanised, happy and ready to finally shine in the competition, I wanted to cry tears of joy. On the flipside, watching Yuri struggle in The Hung Divas’ rehearsal made me sad because I love her. While Bev grew more and more desperate about trying to nail the choreo.
Elimination Day arrived with Bev confronting Kween about their drama the day before, with her explaining that their group felt like they were the unwanted outcasts and she was trying to playfully challenge them. In turn Kween called her out for projecting on her and whispering and taking things a little too seriously. Eventually though, they both apologised and were ready to move on. As they split up to beat their mugs, Kween started to spiral, stressed about the drama and worried about her issues with Bev while Spankie tried to encourage her to breathe and push it aside so she could star. And while she assured us that she will do what needs to be done, given it is what she always does, I am still heartbroken to see her sad at a time when she is clearly poised to shine.
And shine she did, as BAB’Z opened the show and absolutely slayed. They felt like a cohesive girl group, they all shon and sold their personalities. They were camp, they were funny and well, did what needed to be done. When it came to The Hung Divas they all gave killer bright looks and their song was super fun, despite Yuri clearly not being the strongest of dancers. But when she is clearly having fun, does that matter? Given I love Yuri, I vote no.
On the Belts, Buckles and Chains runway, Kween opened the show in a sexy belted, bondage outfit in honour of Mean Girls and her niece. In all the right ways. Spankie gave a sexy, slutty Barbie and well, I love it despite knowing Michelle will hate the lack of pants and its bagginess. Hannah was gothic and sexy, serving Gaultier realness. Bev meanwhile gave Britney’s denim outfit, after dark, Yuri was perfection as a chained snake while Molly closed the show giving yellow and black rocker madam, but make it Elvira.
The judges lived for everything Kween served this week, with Rhys particularly loving the fact she finally owned herself and her place in the competition. Spankie was read for an ill fitting look, though given Rhys and Ru felt it was on brand, they loved it as much as her performance on the girl group. And well, Hannah received universal praise for everything she did this week too. Even charming as she explained her low-rent lyrics. Bev received wall to wall praise much to her delight, while Yuri was read for struggling with her inner sabo-teur, though the judges explained that they love her. While Molly was praised for nailing the runway and rehearsal, despite there being some stumbles in the main performance.
Backstage the dolls were feeling a little confused about who would be in the bottom, given they all received wonderful critiques. Though Molly and Yuri were fairly sure they would be the ones lip syncing. While Bev suggested that maybe they would all be saved for doing well, which is nice, despite Yuri just wanting to feel her feels. The ring of a phone interrupted them as Sophie Monk dialled in – not Courtney Act, FYI – to send her love and give them a pep talk and well, despite myself, I can’t help but love that icon with all my damn heart.
#JusticeForBardot.
Ultimately BAB’Z were deemed the winners of this week’s challenge while Bev was sent to safety alongside them, leaving Yuri and Molly to lip sync for their lives to Chains by mother tucking Tina Arena. And while it was tragically a remix, both the dolls served the hell out of the song, giving emotion, camp and hitting every damn lyric. But when the song kicked it into the epic Tina money-notes, it became Molly’s show as she gave us everything. And then some. Which tragically cost my love Yuri her place, as she exited the competition.
She was crying, the dolls were crying, I was crying and then she gave us iconic words to live by, live fast, eat arse. Which honestly, is now my motto.
Backstage I managed to spot Yuri enter the Werk Room through my tears and immediately pulled her in for a massive hug. There was something just so lovable about Yuri, as she exudes joy and fun throughout the competition. Kinda like a young, kiwi Katya? No matter what it is that made me get a stan card, Yuri now has a fan that will fight anyone that talks shit about her. And while she may have been nervous about my energy, she appreciated the sentiment as I ranted about how robbed she was before dishing up a big bowl of Yuraita Guaii.
While paneer is great, as are all curries, raita is truly the heart and soul of any and all visits to an Indian restaurant. Poppodum too dry? Raita. Curry too hot? Raita. Need something in your mouth? Raita. Spicy, creamy and oh so fresh, it is, to me, perfect.
Enjoy!
Yuraita Guaii Serves: 6.
Ingredients 1 ½ cups Greek yoghurt 1 garlic clove, minced 1 tsp ginger, minced 2 tbsp coriander, roughly chopped 2 tbsp mint, roughly chopped 1 lime, zested and juiced ½ tsp garam masala 1 lebanese cucumber, seeded and diced 1 tomato, diced salt and pepper, to taste
Method Pop everything in a bowl. Stir. Serve. Devour, obvi.
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