Mater Grinstot-Maylffles

Breakfast, Snack, Street Food, Survivor, Survivor 44, TV, TV Recap

Previously on Survivor the three tribes were sitting pretty, confident in the fact they could ride things out to the merge together before starting the next phase of their battle royale. Sadly for them, the producers opted to give us a little format tweak and after sending Jaime, Carson and Josh to journey island, they found themselves returning to a new tribe each. And while that kinda sucked for them, they didn’t go alone, each gifted a hidden immunity idol which would last up until the merge. After Tika tragically lost another immunity challenge, Yam Yam, Sarah and Carolyn were ready to kick Josh to the curb. Well, until Yam Yam and Carolyn started feuding over the latter always being the decoy name, leading to Carolyn flipping to work with Josh to blindside Sarah instead.

Back at camp Yam Yam and Carolyn bickered back and forth about tribal council, with Yam Yam trying to get her to understand that he would have done what she wanted at tribal council if she just told him, while she in turn argued it didn’t seem like that. And told us that she felt more like Yam Yam was upset about being left out, rather than not being told. She explained that she had been made to feel like the third turd of the alliance, before the duo admitted they were just kinda sad that they had issues, questioning if they would be able to move on and come back together. Josh on the other hand was thrilled to have survived against all the odds.

We visited with Ratu the next day where Matthew started to break down to Kane about how much pain he has been in, unsure how he will be able to push through the rest of the game. Kane meanwhile was the absolute sweetest, talking about how proud of him he is as Matthew started to cry again. He also got teary when talking about it to Carson by the well and ugh, I hate where this is going because it feels like this is going to be Kaoh Rong 2.0. Carson meanwhile was thrilled by how much headway he has made within the tribe before he and Kane bonded over being so nerdy and ugh, I just love them both. So, so much.

Checking in with Soka, Danny was leading them through some breathing exercises and just like Kane and Carson, I love him. Because he is so much kookier than you’d expect from a challenge beast. We then learnt that he has a four month old at home and ugh, my basement is flooded. Jaime meanwhile was living for their vibe and so grateful to have landed on Soka, though knew she was clearly on the bottom. As such, she went off with Matt for a wander through the jungle, chatting away, despite Jaime being frustrated by how slowly he is playing the game. She then approached Frannie to let her know she can not read him, with Frannie thrilled she clearly hasn’t figured out how close they are, meaning she can get a read on things and protect him. Given they are clearly falling in love.

Things were still tense over at Tika with Yam Yam asking Josh to stop being angry with him so they could have a fun day. And while he said they could, he kept giving Yam Yam the bitch face – his words – and that annoyed him. But bless, he kept trying. Josh meanwhile was upset because he felt like Carolyn and Yam Yam reuniting may be inevitable and as such, needed to protect himself. He lied to Yam Yam about having a second idol, showing him the note from his last idol to get it over the line. They then bonded over being gay, sharing their childhoods and coming out stories, and well, this is 100% the kind of thing that is more likely to save both of them. Josh meanwhile felt he was sitting pretty now, have bonded with each of them and just needing to decide who to target should they lose the next immunity challenge

Right on cue, the tribes reunited with Jeffrey for said challenge where they would be tethered together and race with a bucket of water over a series of obstacles to release a gate. And then two would solve a table maze, with the first two tribes immune and the loser going to tribal council. Oh, and once again, the victors would get to choose who goes on the next journey. Tika got out to an early lead – YAS – with Ratu nipping at their heels, while Soka fell behind. Everyone evened up at the gate however, so it came down to a race on the table maze with Soka whipping through it and landing their first ball with Ratu nipping on their heels. On their second ball, Soka dropped it, giving Ratu the lead as Tika continued to fall further behind. They raced to take out the win for the extra power with Ratu jagging it just ahead of Soka, while Tika would return to tribal council. Ratu then quickly locked in Brandon as the person from their tribe heading on the journey, with Danny going from Soka and Carolyn from Tika. 

Jeff then ominously called in medical to review Matthew’s injury, as he opened up about how he feels like he just can’t recover and the environment of the game isn’t helping. Probst then told him how strong he had been for his tribe, while Matthew was left to figure out what to do.

We checked in on Yam Yam and Josh back at camp where the latter spoke about wanting to hang on to his idol if he could, as the duo promised to work together. Yam Yam then talked smack about Carolyn, saying she is way more strategic than she appears, warning him that she needs to go ASAP. While Josh was just concerned about what Carolyn’s journey may mean for the game.

Speaking of the journey, the trio arrived at the island where they discovered that rather than an advantage they would instead be enjoying a feast at The Sanctuary to encourage them to talk about the season thus far. Carolyn meanwhile was thrilled to be smashing food, despite the fact she still has to contend with tribal council tonight. She opened up to the boys about Josh’s idol from the swap, inadvertently letting them know that Jaime and Carson also have one. Brandon and Danny then locked in an alliance post-merge, with Carolyn hilariously questioning whether they are including her in this, given they were literally talking as if she wasn’t even there. Though given it blessed us with some hilarious reaction shots from her and made her angry when they kept discounting her, it means we could be in for a Shonee-esque revenge arc. Which is always a good thing.

She ventured back to camp where the boys met her on the shore and quickly told them how much she doesn’t want to work with the bro-alliance, signing to Yam Yam that they need to work together as Josh is likely to go with them. And while he felt it was hilarious, he was glad to have his Carolyn back. She told both of them about the meat brigade which is forming, pointing out Josh was included in their plans and that she was told she would be in the alliance if she saved him. This spooked Josh, who pointed out that he has an idol so it isn’t even a question at this point – it is though – before Carolyn wisely asked to see it. And while Yam Yam assured her he had seen the note, when he whipped out the fake, Yam Yam immediately pointed out the beads actually came from treemail. While Carolyn realised it was literally the same note she read two days ago. Oh and then it came apart in Yam Yam’s hands, and he and Carolyn burst out laughing.

The boys spoke about the fact Carolyn may still have an advantage, while Josh pushed to get her out because he is scared she will rally a counter alliance to the bro alliance he isn’t even in. We then learnt a little about Josh’s life which frankly sounds quite horrific, given how many medical emergencies he has experienced and now I need them to protect our zaddy at all costs. Yam Yam meanwhile wasn’t sure who to trust, catching up with Carolyn who pledged her undying loyalty, knowing that the other options out there are frankly crumby. And while he wants to trust her again, he doesn’t really know he can trust either of them.

Before he had to make a decision, Jeffrey arrived on their shores to let them know that tribal council will not be going ahead due to Matthew having to leave the game because of his shoulder injury. And while it breaks my heart for our plant zaddy king, I am glad the Tika trio live to see another day. Since I now also love Josh and his apparent goal to be the US’ Simon, aka suffering from a case of severe bottomness.

I was a wee bit surprised to see Matthew arrive at Loser Lodge in broad daylight, though I put that aside to pull him in for a gentle hug and tell him how heartbroken I am to see his injury take him out of the game. It was so sad to see someone so excited to be in the game and then have that excitement ultimately become their undoing, particularly someone like Matthew who had already proven himself adept at the game. I assured him that like Bruce before him, I will demand to Jess that he gets a second shot, however the tragedy is that like Nina on HvV, he is now at a disadvantage since everyone will know just how good he is at the game. But I guess that’s what our strategy session was for, over some Mater Grinstot-Maylffles.

Sure, the name may not roll off the tongue as much as I would like, however I was in a rush to throw something together due to his surprise exit and wanted to gift him a perfect recipe. Which is exactly how I would describe tater tot waffles. They may just be throwing tots in a waffle iron, but the magical transformation as they cook is breathtaking. Crunch and glorious, they are equally as perfect with bacon and eggs or as the basis of a burger. Aka, they can do no wrong.

Enjoy!

Mater Grinstot-Maylffles
Serves: 2 queer icons, with long hair and a passion for flannel.

Ingredients
500g tater tots (or Potato Jems, as they are known in Australia)

Method
If you’re using store bought gems, allow them to defrost completely otherwise allow the gems to cool if you’ve made them from scratch.

When you’re ready to go, line the games within a waffle iron, close it and place over a medium heat to cook for about five minutes, or until crispy. Flip the iron and repeat for a further few minutes to crisp. Transfer to a plate and repeat the process until done.

That’s it. Well, other than devouring, of course.


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Potato and Truffllen Brie Pizza

Main, Pizza, Street Food, Survivor, Survivor 44, TV, TV Recap, Vegetarian

Previously on Survivor Probst dropped three new tribes onto the islands of Fiji and over the space of three days, the medical team became the stars of the show as there were injuries aplenty. The first happened during the opening challenge, which tragically resulted in Bruce being evacuated late that night. Zaddy Matthew was the next to go down, climbing a massive rock and promptly falling, slicing his foot open and dislocating his shoulder. While he was ok to continue in the game, it did rule him out of the challenge leaving Ratu without some much needed strength, costing them immunity and sending them to tribal council. And what a tribal council it was, as Matthew and Jamie played their Shot in the Darks – the latter being the first to lead to immunity – Lauren banked her vote for a later date and Brandon played his idol, negating two votes – a new advantage – and sending Maddy out of the game with a single vote.

Back at camp the mood at Ratu was a little bit awkward as everyone processed how messy tribal council was. Matthew meanwhile was thrilled that Brandon was able to save himself, given he desperately wanted him to stay. He then congratulated Jamie on going down in history as the first person to have correctly played their Shot in the Dark before admitting to us that he burnt his solely so he could keep his hands clean and options open for the future. Lauren then admitted that she does have the extra vote in her bag, so no one needs to go hunting to find out if she holds power because she does. Brandon meanwhile asked Kane why he voted for him, with poor Kane explaining it was simply the last name he heard before they left but assured him there are no hard feelings. Though to Brandon, it was very clear there were hard feelings. Despite the fact he was trying to pretend otherwise.

We dropped by Soka the next day with Matt, Claire and Heidi talking about puppies, with him opening up to them that his ex-girlfriend has sole custody of their dog and he is heartbroken to have lost them. And ugh, he is the sweetest and must be protected at all costs. He opened up to us about how it feels like his bad luck in life has translated to the game given he has lost his votes at the first two tribal councils. He then opened up about his crush on Frannie before opening up to her about it, with the little nerds desperately trying to downplay their bond. While constantly being drawn together with their cuteness. While Queen Claire worried it would cost Frannie in the long run, given it was so damn obvious.

Over at Tika the tribe were selling off Bruce’s belongings before Helen spoke about how the locked cage is playing on everyone’s minds and making things super tense. Carolyn wisely suggested they just go hunt for the key together to put an end to the speculation which Yam Yam readily agreed to, given he was desperate for some fun. Or so he said, as he admitted to us that he is definitely just as fixated on it as everyone else. Helen meanwhile was concerned about someone she isn’t working with finding the key, while I assumed Carolyn had found it. When in fact she actually had grabbed a damn snake.

Back at Ratu Kane went hunting for an idol, hoping the flushed one had been rehidden already. Sadly for him, however, everyone else knew what he was up to. While he didn’t find the idol, he did snatch a crab which should earn him some credit, though it really only confirmed everyone’s opinion that he can’t be trusted. We returned to Soka where Danny was also hunting for the key under the guise of finding firewood – which Matt sweetly believed, rather than thinking he was being shady, bless. Danny obviously snatched the key and was thrilled to have a little power. We pivoted to Tika where the snake scared the hell out of everyone from hunting except for Carolyn, who shared a story about her hunting through her son’s poop to find a tooth he swallowed to make sure he got the full tooth fairy experience. And just like that, her persistence once again paid off as she found the idol. Just like his tooth.

As Claire and Matt spoke about the nerves of opening the cage, Danny put his fears aside and snatched it, leaving the fake behind. While Claire and Matt confirmed nothing looked different in the cage when they next walked past.

Carolyn meanwhile was busy pretending that she didn’t find the key while everyone spoke about how shocking it is that nobody had luck, given how hard they had been hunting. As everyone departed to search a new area, Carolyn made a break for it and unlocked the cage to jag her idol and the fake, leaving it completely empty. She then realised how bad an idea that was given she was the only solitary person, so popped the bag back and relocked the cage. Thankfully taking the idol with her. Sadly though, the rest of the tribe returned to the cage and immediately could tell someone had tampered with it, leading to everyone speculating about what would have happened before they agreed to empty out their bags in front of each other. While doing that, Carson decided Halen was being sneaky, Yam Yam and Sarah thought it was each other who found the idol, while nobody suspected Carolyn who was alone for the most time and had the damn thing. So yeah, I stan mother Carolyn.

The tribes came together with Jeff in a field where they would race over an obstacle, collect sandbags and empty them to release a ball, climb a ladder, race over a bridge and then guide the ball up a snake maze. In addition to immunity, the first place tribe would jag an epic fishing kit while second place would get some meagre fishing supplies. While the losers would get a date with Jeffrey, my preferred option. Soka got lucky releasing their ball on the first go, giving themselves a massive advantage as the others fell behind. Tika found their ball and tried to close the gap before Ratu eventually rejoined the game. As always, the puzzle proved to be the great equaliser as Matthew powered through, solving it without dropping the ball once as Sarah and Josh struggled for their tribes. Both of them started to get their eyes in though as it became a race to the finish with Josh just securing immunity, sending Tika to tribal council.

Back at camp the tribe were disappointed to have lost, while Carson was disappointed that Matthew had clearly studied the puzzle to help him take out the win. Since he 3D printed the most used puzzles and had also practised, it just didn’t pay off for him this time. He opened up to us about being a literal rocket scientist, though wanted to play the game by focusing on relationships to take control. First up he approached Sarah and Helen with the girls floating the idea of getting rid of Carolyn, and while the trio were confident, the fact that Sarah didn’t have a vote nor want to tell anyone about that could prove their undoing.

Sarah tried to lock in Yam Yam to work around her lack of vote and while he pretended to be on board, he immediately ran off to loop in Carolyn as the duo locked in a plan on Helen instead. Carson joined up with them and assured them that he actually wants to align with them to take control. Yam Yam explained to us that Carolyn is like Cher and Goofy had a baby, which adds nothing but is important to me. Proving herself to be way more than a kooky character, Carolyn questioned why Carson would want to work with her, given he is good with everyone, which made her worry that a blindside is potentially afoot. He spoke to us about loving being in the middle given each duo brings out a different side of his personality, so he just needs to pick which one he wants to embrace during the game.

At tribal council Yam Yam spoke about how tense things were at camp as everyone grew more and more paranoid about the vote. Helen agreed that you start to second guess everything as everyone goes person to person to talk plans, given you all think you had just known how things would play out. She admitted that tribe strength is kind of important given they are soon to be down to four, while Sarah spoke about strength to her being allies while Carson felt like they were a little screwed to have lost their strength on Day One. Carson laughed about looking like a teen while Carolyn started to get emotional about being grateful to be in the game, feeling nervous that her time may be up. She alluded to the fact that she wants to work with people that want to talk to her, while Yam Yam hoped that the vote would solidify some alliances.

With that the tribe voted, Carolyn held onto her idol despite the nerves and Helen found herself tragically booted from the game. Though TBH, this is my favourite tribe so losing anyone would have been tragic. As Helen arrived at Loser Lodge I pulled her in for a massive hug, assuring her she had built a strong foundation in the game, which was undone by a medevac and her closest ally losing her vote. Oh and our very own Survivor Pizza Curse which cost her her game. But given she scored herself an entire Potato and Truffllen Brie Pizza, she couldn’t be mad for long.

Potato and cheese are arguably the most comforting culinary combinations, but when you pop them on a pizza (and add a little truffle) it gets taken to a whole new level. 

Enjoy!

Potato and Truffllen Brie Pizza
Serves: 1 pre-merge boot, 2-4 for dinner.

Ingredients
2 bases as per Pizsa Zsa Gabor
1 tbsp truffle oil
2 garlic cloves, thinly sliced
200g truffled brie, torn or cut into inch-sized chunks
4 potatoes, thinly sliced
8 fresh sage leaves
100g fior di latte, shredded

Method
Prep the bases as per Zsa Zsa’s instructions and preheat the oven to 180°C.

Drizzle the bases with truffle oil before topping with garlic, brie, potatoes, sage and a sprinkle of fior di latte. Pop the pizza into the oven and bake for fifteen minutes, or until bubbly and golden.

Serve and devour immediately, eating to welcome our newest robbed goddess.


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Robin Daufiercenoise

Side, TV Recap, Vegetarian, RuPaul's Drag Race, TV, RuPaul's Drag Race 15

Previously on RuPaul’s Drag Race the dolls formed three fashion houses out of homewares inspired by Michelle, Ross or Carson. Amongst the sea of Jersey divas, Palm Springs holiday makers and preppy ranchers, Luxx was gorgeous, Sasha continued to not put a single molecule wrong and Malaysia was an artiste with hot glue. At the other end of the pack, Salina gave way too much and Amethyst was an absolute unfinished, mess. Despite a bunch of strong looks, Luxx managed to score her first win of the season while Salina fired up in the lip sync, sending Amethyst home on her third lip sync.

Backstage Salina was still in her feelings though assured her sisters her time in the bottom did nothing but motivate her to slay. Luxx meanwhile was feeling her oats, glad to officially now be a frontrunner with Sasha, Loosey and Anetra. Malaysia meanwhile opened up about how glad she was to just land in the top, which hilariously led to Luxx sharing that she wasn’t actually sure whether Malaysua was one of the tops or bottoms.

The next day the dolls were busy keeping the drama alive as Malaysia questioned who thought she shouldn’t have topped with Mistress gladly telling her that she was sure she didn’t deserve it. And well, she has no taste either. Before their friendship could be ruined, Ru dropped by to announce that this week they’d be forming a trio of Golden-Girl Groups. One group would play rock, another country and the last would serve hip hop. And the dolls would be selecting their options. But not before the Old Gays dropped by to join the Pit Crew and ugh, I love how cute they are.

After the Old Gays were chased out of the Werk Room, the dolls sat down to listen to their tunes with everyone vibing with various genres before the dolls locked in which one they wanted. Obviously there was drama as two of the groups chose metal, leading to a fight while Anetra, Loosey, Jax and Robin gladly snatched hip hop for themselves. Inspired by Daya Betty, both of the other groups refused to back down as Malaysia, and Mistress and Luxx in particular got heated before Marcia Cubed suggested some rock, paper, scissors. Group Hip Hop grew more and more exhausted by the drama before the others ultimately selected the genre out of a hat, with Malaysia, Sasha, Spice and Aura thrilled to come out on top with metal. With the drama over, the groups split up to start writing their verses with Luxx, Mistress, Salina and Marcia trying to polish the emotional turd that was their loss. Salina in particular spiralled, given she hates country music.

Team Hip Hop were first to record with Anetra leaning into silly, Loosey was hilarious, Jax was fierce and while Robin was confident in her vocals, she was terrified of her rap ways and seemed to struggle. Team Country kicked it off with Marcia showing off her Broadway chops, Mistress leaning into country, Luxx giving gospel queen and well Salina just ignored the genre and had fun. Team Metal were feeling the pressure to slay but they shouldn’t have, given they all killed the record and gave all the fire. Despite Aura being completely in her nerves at the start. When it came to the choreography the hip hop dolls focused on whether they used walkers or canes, Marcia led the country girls to a strong, cohesive piece while Sasha and Aura desperately tried to keep the girls on task. Despite heckling from Mistress.

Elimination Day arrived with the dolls thrilled to be showing off their old selves with Spice catching up with Sasha, pointing out that while they joke about her being old, she really isn’t. Sasha pointed out that it really doesn’t bother her given so many trans women often don’t live to be her age. She shared stories of raids in one of her home clubs in Hawaii in the 60s and how far they have come since then, which made her breakdown with gratitude to be able to show off a happy, thriving trans woman and ugh, again, crown her. Meanwhile Mistress and Malaysia were fighting back and forth about their make up and while Mistress was clearly thinking it was fun, I feel like Malaysia missed the memo.

Ru, Michelle and the hilarious Ross Mathews were joined on the panel by the iconic Megan Stalter as the Shady Pines-A-Palooza kicked off with the Banjo Bitches. And well, despite not wanting to do country, they kinda knocked it out of the park. Particularly Marcia’s threat to potentially drop dead mid-song. The Rockin’ Old Gs meanwhile were fire from start to finish with Sasha once again proving she is a damn star, Aura meanwhile was perfection and had her hero moment while Spice had hilarious saggy tiddies while Malaysia gave ancient regal swamp demon and I live. Ol’ Dirty Bitches meanwhile were gloriously street giving killer choreography, though I feel like the judges will read them for being too limber for oldies.

On the Tie-Dye to Die For runway Anetra gave 00s Britney, Jax looked to be covered in slime, Loosey was glam in lilac. Robin was a pink puff delight, Mistress was full pageant, Luxx was a model, Salina gave mermaid, Marcia showed us how she broke her nose, Sasha was a wet, dropping hippie, Aura was perfection in a pantsuit, Spice was acidic and Malaysia was a glam grand damn. And that is all you get cause it literally lasted 30 seconds max.

Loosey, Luxx, Salina, Marcia, Spice and Malaysia were sent to safety before Anetra received universal praise for her runway and lyrics, though read for not being able to lip sync her own verse. Jax was praised for the lyrics though read for giving an orange bodysuit and for being ahead of the beat in the choreography. Robin was read for holding back and playing it safe, with her admitting she doesn’t really like to take risks and as such, is happy to stay in her wheelhouse. Mistress was labelled a star for knocking the performance out of the park and for looking stunning on the runway. Sasha rightly was praised for giving her best, stupid self in the performance and for always being perfect while Aura got far and away the best praise for nailing each and every moment of the week.

Backstage the safe queens were thrilled to be here another week, with the country girls particularly glad to prove they could slay anything despite not wanting the genre. Talk turned to the placements with Luxx sure Robin would be in the bottom, while Loosey thought she may be in the top, while Marcia was shocked to not be in the top, given she did all the choreography. Loosey questioned why Salina didn’t want to do hip hop before talk returned to the feud for rock, with Malaysia calling the other queens bullies. This resulted in the second round of the fight, with Luxx shocked Malaysia was taking things so damn seriously before Marcia told the dolls to stop fighting. Which was the straw that broke Malaysia’s back, who cussed her out and told her to let her feel her feelings. While Marcia just tried to apologise and move on.

Loosey expertly changed the subject to how she felt this challenge made them feel a little stressed, given the challenge is so iconic and important. The girls reflected on their time with the Old Gays and what they learnt by chatting with them and ugh, they are so damn sweet and hearing how they all lost most of their friends in the 80s was just heartbreaking. And while they love how open everyone is these days, they still see the importance of building a strong community. And these scenes are why we need the longer episodes, because it shouldn’t have been buried in Untucked.

Spice decided they should play charades and well, she was just as good at that as she was at Snatch Game. Thankfully the tops and bottoms joined the fray before she could walk another fucking duck, with Aura sharing she was clearly one of the tops and bpy was feeling all of her oats. Mistress shared that she too was in the top, thanking Marcia specifically for getting her there. Robin opened up about how their group made up the bottom and that she will clearly be lip syncing against Jax. Though the duo and Anetra all got to work learning the lyrics, as Anetra is not an idiot and knows to come prepared.

Ultimately Sasha was deemed safe as Aura took out her first win of the season before Mistress was sent to safety alongside Anetra, leaving Jax and Robin to lip sync for their lives. And well, we always knew Jax would turn it out but when The Bangles In Your Room kicked off she basically exploded, giving clean lines and all the moments and while Robin put up a good fight, Jax is Jax – we all remember the skipping, right? – and rightly saved her place in the competition, tragically sending Robin out the door (directly after her ex, no less).

Given Robin is literally the calmest, sweetest person to compete on Drag Race, she walked into the Werk Room with her head held high and was just grateful for the opportunity. I pulled her in for a massive hug and assured her that while she doesn’t have a large personality – compared to her new sisters, at least – she had plenty of star moments during her run. From serving killer looks and solid performances, each week she was able to showcase her talent. And sometimes, that is enough. As is a piping hot Robin Daufiercenoise.

There is nothing more enjoyable than a potato bake, in whatever form or flavour it comes. Rich, warm and oh so soothing, it is the perfect way to dazzle at a barbecue or warm up a cold winter night.

Enjoy!

Robin Daufiercenoise
Serves: 6.

Ingredients
500ml double cream
500ml milk
5 garlic cloves
2 tsp fresh thyme leaves
¼ tsp freshly grated nutmeg
4 maris piper potatoes, thinly sliced
2 sweet potatoes, thinly sliced
100g gruyère cheese, grated

Method
Preheat the oven to 180C.

Combine the cream, milk, garlic, thyme and nutmeg in a large saucepan and bring to a simmer. Add the potato and sweet potato and cook for a few minutes, stirring frequently to avoid sticking. Remove from heat.

Remove the potatoes with a slotted spoon and evenly layer in a shallow baking dish. Pour over the warmed cream and top with the gruyère. Pop in the oven to bake for half an hour, or until the potatoes are tender and the cheese is golden and bubbly.

Then devour, in whatever fashion you like to smash your bakes.


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Ryan Wedgranos

Side, Snack, Street Food, Survivor, Survivor 43, TV, TV Recap

Previously on Survivor the tribe was split into two groups as has become tradition – not back to two tribes – for a little double tribal council. Probst then threw down a challenge for reward, with the person that could last the longest in the immunity challenge winning PB&Js for the tribe. And try as Karla might, her stitched up hand proved too much to overcome as she took out immunity but left her group hungry as they headed to the first tribal council. While James quickly locked in everyone against his nemesis Owen, things weren’t so simply as Noelle played him, stealing Owen’s vote and using it to join with Sami – and a reluctant Karla – to blindside James from the game.

But first, let’s take a little step back.

We followed the winning team back to camp where they quickly got to work making their PB&Js and greedily devouring them. With that out of the way, Ryan pulled Gabler aside to quickly lock in the vote against Cassidy. They went to Cody to float the idea and while he pretended to be keen, he immediately went to catch up with Jesse and Cassidy, admitting that he really likes her and as such, wants her to stay. She then went all in, assuring them that they already have a good bond and can trust each other and as such, it makes sense they go to the end together. She then opened up to us about her love for her family and how she is playing in honour of her deceased sister, who she used to watch the show with, and well, if they eliminate her after this beautiful personal content, I will be very very angry.

Cody and Jesse caught up solo to talk through the best move for their game moving forward, unsure whether it was a good idea to keep Ryan around as a meat shield despite the risk that voting out Cassidy could potentially piss off her allies Karla and James. Jesse rightly pointed out that going to tribal council second gives them more options, suggesting that if Owen goes out they keep Cassidy around to keep James and Karla happy, while if James is gone, they could be safe to take a shot. Locking in their options, they approached Gabler to get him on board and well, this could really be interesting!

At tribal council they were positively shocked to see James sitting on the jury, though also a little bit delighted, TBH. Jesse spoke about how James clearly was in a powerful position before the split while Ryan was concerned about what his boot meant for any alliances he was in. Cassidy made Probst very happy, talking about the monster coming to get for them, particularly given they are now back to a small tribe dynamic. Ryan too was concerned, given it only takes three votes to be out of the game. We flipped back to Cassidy who spoke about how difficult it is to handle having conversations and then see the people you just spoke to disappearing to talk to other people.

Cody meanwhile loved being safe, though felt it came with the heavy price of having a little power and feeling like he was in the driver’s seat for the night. Ryan agreed that people spent more time talking to Cody than him, though he had 30 pounds of clams in his bag and well, should they vote him out, he is happy to walk out with them. While Cassidy was just nervous about how the vote will reverberate through the dynamics when the groups come back together. With that the tribe voted and tragically booted zaddy Ryan – and his clams – from the game.

After quickly dishing up James his jam, I ran to find Ryan in Ponderosa and pulled him in for a massive hug, assuring him that he played a great game. But more importantly, reminded him that he is such an inspiration and is SUPER hot to boot and as such, if he isn’t invited back to the very next possible All Stars season, I will riot, or something. He obviously thought I was joking about everything, so we laughed and celebrated his success with a big, fat bowl of Ryan Wedgranos.

You know I have a passion for fried potato in all their forms, but there is something super special about wedges. I mean, a little spiced, chunky enough to give you the perfect balance of crunch and fluff, AND their frequent collaboration with sour cream. How could you go wrong?

Enjoy!

Ryan Wedgranos
Serves: 2 dear friends that would make a glorious couple.

Ingredients
1 ½ tsp paprika
1 tsp garlic powder
½ tsp onion powder
1 tsp salt
½ tsp pepper
1 tsp dried oregano
½ cup parmesan cheese, grated
1 kg potatoes, peeled and cut each into 8 wedges
3 tbsp olive oil
sour cream and sweet chilli, to serve

Method
Preheat the oven to 220°C.

Mix the paprika, garlic powder, onion powder, salt, pepper, oregano and parmesan in a bowl. Place the potatoes in a large bowl and drizzle with the oil and sprinkle over the spice mix. Toss until well coated.

Spread the wedges out in a single layer on lined baking sheets, ensuring one of the cut sides are face down. Bake for 30-45 minutes, turning once halfway through to the other cut edge, and bake until browned and crisp.

Then devour them with a vat of sour cream and sweet chilli, which is customary in a pub.


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Pheko Phettata

Breakfast, Main, Survivor South Africa, Survivor South Africa: Return of the Outcasts, TV, TV Recap

Previously on Survivor South Africa 20 castaways from seasons past relit their torches for a shot at redemption and an even bigger prize. Split based on their placement in their original seasons, the post-merge returnees on Masu quickly stamped their name on the contest and easily took out reward. Sadly for them, that was as far as it went as Yontau dominated the first immunity challenge and protected Seamus from going the way of Francesqua. Yontau was nearly split down the middle, with a trio of pairs aligning against the Season 6 castaways. And Tejan. However that was all for nought as Chappies was sprung hunting for a hidden immunity idol in the middle of the night, with his ally Dante leading the charge to send our iconic Nude King Chappies from the game.

The next day his duo Steffi was feeling isolated after being left out of the loop for the first time in her Survivor career. On the flipside, Palesa was thrilled to be in the majority for once. She opened up about her surprise at Tevin giving her the idol, knowing it could help solidify things with the other tribe after the swap. Given she isn’t overly comfortable with the current majority, which is a trademark good read from Palesa. Speaking of which, Marian was catching up with Dante and Meryl and locking in the plan for their original alliance and flipping on the alliance with Season 6. Likely making them wish they only played poker together, rather than getting inked. Shane meanwhile was disappointed by the blindside and almost being voted out, though after Marian caught him up on all the drama – and how she protected him – he was well and truly feeling better.

Over at Yontau the tribe were living their best lives, except for Tania who was disappointed in Pinty and her general selfishness when it comes to food. After she quietly complained to Phil, the tribe went for a walk down along the beach leaving Thoriso to look for the idol. And when Tania and Killarney caught her, she told them not to worry about her given Tevin had already found it as she watched on. Which obviously spread like wildfire and eventually made its way to Tevin who was surprisingly chill, instead only concerned by the fact that perception is reality and he now has to navigate it, rather than say, seek out revenge on Thoriso ASAP.

The tribes reconvened with zaddy Nico for the immunity challenge where Yontau were gagged to see Chappies had been voted out. But back to the challenge. Five castaways from each tribe will race out in the water one at a time to retrieve a fish trap holding balls before the rest of the tribe wheel them back in. And once all the balls have been retrieved, they will shoot them into a trough with the first to land them all jagging immunity and reward, in the form of an epic fishing kit. Pinty got Yontau out to a very early lead while Masu struggled to figure out the winch system. Lucky for them, Tevin struggled in the water allowing them to close the gap slightly but TBH, it was still a blow out despite Shane working overtime shooting half of the Masu balls as Dino secured immunity for Yontau.

More importantly, we won as Dante rocked his speedo during the challenge.

Back at camp Yontau were thrilled to take out victory and while they were all happy, Tevin killed the vibe by calling out people speculating about him having an idol. Tania being the absolute sweetest took the fall and said she had been speculating about it only and while I love her for doing it, I feel like this is coming back to bite her. With that, Tevin pointed out the symbols around camp to everyone and then led the tribe on an idol hunt with Seamus successfully jagging it. Though disappointed everyone knew, rendering it powerless. But you know, at least he has it for the next tribal council should they go, since it expires after then.

Later that day, Pinty snuck off by herself to smash a secret coconut before coming back to camp to cuss out Tania for calling her out for eating more than everyone else. She then stormed off in the darkness to go hunt for mussels while the tribe rallied around Tania and assured her they agreed, though they weren’t really open to calling Pinty out and creating tension. No doubt since none of them want to miss the merge a second time by rocking the boat like Pinty.

We checked in with Masu where Palesa was frustrated by their loss and wanted to focus on keeping the tribe strong, rather than sticking with her alliances. Toni and PK meanwhile were desperate to get rid of Marian given she isn’t overly strong and not open with them about her gameplay. As Toni caught up with Steffi and suggested Marian be the one to go, Marian quietly watched on and knew she had to get to work and prove Toni wrong. Steffi immediately approached an upset Marian, who opened up to her about how she is in so much pain due to her vitiligo and being in the sun. And damn, I am loving Steffi this season as she quietly held Marian and raised her up. Toni meanwhile continued to go person to person talking about how weak Marian is, with Palesa happy to sit back and let her take the lead.

Well, until she disagrees with a decision.

Marian, Steffi, Meryl and Dante caught up to figure out the counterplan, with Meryl wanting to focus on Toni given she can morph into her role within the tribe. Though she was willing to wait it out, given there should be another opportunity and as such, she was fine to tow the line and get rid of PK. Dante opened up about wanting to play a more active game this go around, so led the charge to rally said vote against PK before dropping by to chat to Toni and pretend he was keen to get rid of Marian. 

Oh and then Marian straight up found a diplomatic immunity idol, which just means she can elect to join the other tribe at tribal council – or send someone else from the tribe – before they vote. And while that is risky, that could be super useful post-swap, which is exactly how she sold it to her delighted allies.

At tribal council Steffi spoke about the tribe being struck down with a case of the alphas and as such, every time they compete, everyone is jockeying to lead rather than working together. Shane agreed and suggested that the one true leader needs to emerge and make decisions for them, which is advice that I’m not exactly sure will fix things. Dante spoke about the pre-season relationships playing a role in decision making, which annoyed Toni and PK who fired up and said people need to move on from their matching tattoos they got after their first season (essentially). Palesa meanwhile downplayed past relationships and instead spoke about the real issue being everyone is trying to run from their past games and as such, creating a lot of uncertainty.

Dante spoke about making the decision that will help them win challenges, which doesn’t necessarily mean physical strength. This led to Marian opening up about her emotional breakdown and that Steffi was the only one to comfort her, leading to Toni once again firing up and saying she never even saw it. And the fact Marian also never even spoke to her today, so she wasn’t ostracising her. Meryl admitted she didn’t speak to everyone either, though she spoke to people that were privy to other plans. Shane spoke about making decisions based on sticking with the majority, which everyone agreed was their plan, meaning half the tribe are about to be blindsided.

With that the tribe votes and Shane was one of the people that actually landed in the majority as the Breakfast Club banded together to take out PK. As Toni watched on in tears, kinda proving their decision right, given how close they are. Which is something PK agreed with as he arrived at Loser Lodge and I entered into my usual post-boot peptalk. Like Chappies before him, the odds were always stacked against PK going into the season due to his bonds and being a massive threat. Which seemed to be enough to cheer him up as we smashed a Pheko Phettata (but sadly only a Pheko Phettata).

Light, fluffy and a little bit spicy, this little Mexican inspired frittata is the perfect way to start the day. Or close out your second Survivor journey. Or for any reason, TBH.

Enjoy!

Pheko Phettata
Serves: 2.

Ingredients
1 chorizo, sliced into coins
1 potato, cut into 1cm dice
1 red onion, diced
5 garlic cloves, crushed
400g red kidney beans, drained, rinsed
a small handful coriander leaves, roughly chopped
6 eggs
½ cup cream
⅓ cup parmesan cheese, grated, plus extra to serve
1 tsp hot sauce
salt and pepper, to taste

Method
Preheat the oven to 170°C.

Pop a frying pan over medium heat and cook the chorizo for a couple of minutes, or until the onion starts to ooze. Add the potato and onion and cook, stirring, for a further five minutes. Add the garlic and beans and cook for a further minute. Remove from the heat and stir in the coriander.

Transfer the mixture into a greased pie dish. Whisk together the eggs, cream, parmesan, hot sauce and a good whack of salt and pepper. Pour over the chorizo and potato mixture, followed by another sprinkling of cheese.

Pop the frittata in the oven and cook for 20-30 minutes, or until golden, puffed and cooked through. Allow to rest for five minutes before transferring to a plate and devouring. Joyously.


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Lentil Pie Giang

Main, Pie, Snack, Street Food, Survivor, Survivor 42, TV, TV Recap

Previously on Survivor, Jeffrey opted to keep the twists coming, this time going with the old faithful of splitting the merged tribe into two groups. Then offering out an immunity for someone on each group before they head to back-to-back tribal councils and each boot someone from the game. After trying to rally a sausage fest alliance earlier in the episode, Rocksroy was living his dream on group one where he was stuck with his allies Mike, Hai and Omar, and they were primed to get rid of Romeo. Sadly for him, Omar and Hai weren’t so keen on the all male alliance and everyone joined together to boot Rocks from the game instead. Upon seeing another African American had joined the jury, both Maryanne and Drea were nervous that unconscious bias had seeped into the game. As such, they each played their idols leaving Tori as the only option to be booted. Not because Lindsay was immune, but because she is a queen.

Back at camp Hai was thrilled that their tribal council went to plan, particularly grateful that Mike was on board and he doesn’t have to worry about him getting annoyed and blowing up their alliance. Despite Mike being a little salty to have had to do it. Sadly as he complained to Omar, the latter saw an opening to get Mike to ditch Hai in favour of him and as such plotted to absolutely trash their bond. The two groups then reunited where the latter group were still reeling from the emotion of their tribal council, though given it was Tori that went, not many people were actually bothered.

The next day Lindsay pulled Omar aside to talk shit about how bossy and stupid Jonathan was the day before as he was willing to risk Maryanne. And needless to say, Omar was just as unhappy to be aligned with Jonathan and was very keen to try and figure out how to make a break. Knowing that a new idol should be hidden around camp, Lindsay left Omar to go for a hunt. Sadly for her, she literally touched it in her search though missed it and kept on moving. Which gave Maryanne enough time to stumble on it while hunting for twigs and well, she was absolutely thrilled.

As the wind and rain whipped across the beach, the tribe met up with Jeff for the latest reward challenge. Which would have been tough if they had to stop shivering. Instead, they just had to balance a sack on a pole and manoeuvre through obstacles before tossing it at a target. The first one to finish winning an overnight reward complete with shelter, a bed and pizza. And did I mention pizza? While Jonathan got out to an early lead, Lindsay and Hai were nipping out his heels. And well, Lindsay straight up landed her bag on the second toss and it was so exciting to watch her cute reaction. Probst, being cheeky, then gave Lindsay the chance to take someone with her, opting for Omar since he has not received a reward yet. Feeling kind, she was then given one other spot, opting to take Mike to further build their relationship. And shit, they are ruining Hai on this reward, aren’t they?

Back at camp the tribe were miserable, in pain from how cold and exhausted they are. Showing far more strength than I could muster, everyone rallied around, pulling the shelter apart to fix it up and try to give them a much needed reprieve from the weather. We then learnt that Hai had a difficult upbringing as an immigrant, and hearing him talk about how this pain is only temporary, well, I fell in love with him again. Particularly when he and Lindsay whispered about banding together to get rid of Jonathan.

We then fast forwarded through said misery to when Lindsay, Omar and Mike arrived at the sanctuary, smashing pizzas before they were distracted by the sound of their loved ones. A wall of TVs then lit up, with photos and videos from home and ugh, I’m crying, they’re crying and well, it was just beautiful. After drying their tears and hugging it out, talk turned to the game with Omar quickly throwing Hai under the bus and well, Mike bought it hook, line and sinker and while I live for cheeky little Omar, I am heartbroken. As Mike seethed, Lindsay opened up about her amulet and as such, admitted she would be very willing to turn on Hai to increase her power. Despite being pissed with Jonathan.

The tribe regrouped with Probst for the latest immunity challenge where they would each have to stand on a narrow balance beam and balance a ball on the curve of an upturned bow. Almost instantly Mike and Hai dropped out, while everyone else stood still like statues. Out of nowhere Romeo dropped his ball, followed by Omar before the final four moved down to a narrower stretch of beam. That saw Maryanne drop straight away, while Jonathan continued to struggle through. Drea dropped her ball out of nowhere while Jonathan defied the odds as he and Lindsay made it to the final round. Sadly for Jonathan, his giant feet couldn’t handle the twig-like beam beneath him and finally dropped his ball, handing Lindsay immunity.

And more importantly, kept her challenge run alive!

Back at camp everyone was thrilled by the fact Lindsay took out immunity, meaning they could finally take their shot on Jonathan. Hai caught up with Mike, assuring him that they are 100% solid and that getting rid of Jonathan is the best for all of them. Sadly Hai did not realise Mike now hates him, as such immediately taking the information from Omar to Jonathan and floated the idea of getting rid of Hai instead. Meanwhile Lindsay was pulling Drea over to her side before she realised that every single person would be happy to just get rid of Hai and call it a day.

Oblivious to his impending doom, Hai caught up with Jonathan and assured him that he doesn’t need to play his Shot in the Dark tonight as he will gladly play his non-existent idol on Jonathan instead. Thrilled to have fooled him, Hai happily pottered around camp while Omar and Jonathan caught up over the plan. Which sadly made Omar nervous about getting rid of Hai, given he is actually loyal to him and that there is always the fear of Jonathan going on an immunity run to the end.

At tribal council Lindsay was feeling her oats over winning back-to-back challenges with Mike particularly thrilled to have had the chance to get warm for even one night on reward. Lindsay articulated how they are all a little mad for wanting to play the game, given it is so miserable though they are also living for it. Hai admitted that he was worried about what was discussed on the reward, though felt that every single one of them have no idea whether they were out in front or at the back of the pack. And one stumble could switch everything up in an instant anyway.

Omar agreed it was hard to decide on the right decision at any given moment while Mike shared that most of his decisions are based on what his gut is telling him. And then Maryanne likened the entire game to playing Jenga, with constantly moving pieces making it difficult for everyone. Lindsay then threw down the gauntlet, saying that her vote would be based on evening the playing field which immediately made Jonathan nervous. Luckily for him it was all for show as the tribe banded together to get rid of Hai instead.

Thankfully Hai is an absolute, pure delight and entered Ponderosa with a smile on his face despite being brutally blindsided by the entire tribe. Though I guess that is arguably the best way to go out, if you are voted out. I congratulated him on playing such a killer game and while I was disappointed to see him go, I am thrilled to have given him some loving comfort. In the form of Lentil Pie Giang.

A little bit spicy and oh-so-warming, this pie is not only life affirming – don’t tell me food isn’t – but it also is healthy, since it is vegetarian. So why have one, when you can have them all. You know?

Enjoy!

Lentil Pie Giang
Serves: 8. Or, as I mentioned, 1.

Ingredients
1 tbsp olive oil
1 onion, diced
3 garlic cloves, minced
1 tbsp ginger, minced
1 red chilli, finely chopped
1 carrot, grated
1 celery stalk, sliced
2 tsp black mustard seeds
2 tsp ground cumin
2 tsp ground coriander
1 tsp ground turmeric
300g brown lentils
2 potatoes, cut into 1cm dice
400g can diced tomatoes
2 cups vegetable stock
1 cup coconut milk
½ cup peas
½ cup coriander, roughly chopped
salt and pepper
2 sheets shortcrust pastry
2 sheet puff pastry
1 egg, lightly whisked

Method
Heat a lug of olive oil in a large pot over medium heat and sweat the onion, garlic, ginger, chilli, carrot and celery, until soft and sweet. Stir through the mustard seeds and spices, and cook for another couple of minutes, or until fragrant. Add lentils, potato, tomatoes and stock,  and bring to a simmer. Reduce heat to low, cover and cook, stirring infrequently, for 1 hour or until lentils and potato are tender. Stir in coconut milk, peas and coriander, and season to taste and remove from the heat.

Preheat the oven to 200°C and cut each pastry sheet into four squares.

Press the shortcrust pastry into the bases of eight individual pie dishes. Divide the mixture between the pie dishes before brushing the pastry with some egg. Cover the pies with the puff pastry, pressing the pastries together to steal. Neaten the edges, or scrunch it up, depending on if you love a little excess pastry around the edges.

Brush the tops of the pies with more egg, cut a little steam hole in the middle and pop them on a baking sheet. Transfer the baking sheet into the oven and bake for 20 minutes or so, or until the pastry is golden and crisp.

Allow to cool for five minutes or so before devouring.


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Willow Country Poil

Main, RuPaul's Drag Race, RuPaul's Drag Race 14, Seafood, Street Food, TV, TV Recap

Previously on RuPaul’s Drag Race fourteen news queens entered the Werk Room, again split into two batches of seven. Unlike last season, Ru got a little bit cheeky and implied that Orion Story and Daya Betty were felled in their respective first episodes. Only to gag the dolls by welcoming them back when everyone came together. The gags kept coming in the third episode as all the queens lined up to select a RuPaul chocolate bar with Ru explaining that after a queen loses a lip sync they would each open theirs. If it is chocolate, they sashay away as normal however if it was golden, they would live to slay another day.

So yeah, Ru is in her Wonka era now.

Sadly for June Jambalaya she did not have a golden ticket, making her the third boot that is the official first boot of the season. She was soon followed out the door by Alyssa before Kornbread’s onkle went cleek and she was medically evacuated. Orion then officially exited the competition before we farewelled Maddy and the lovely and iconic Tranos herself, Kerri Colby – that look, OMG.

After what felt like weeks of non-eliminations and the worst Snatch Game on record, Daya was delighted as Jasmine Kennedie was finally sent packing before Bosco found the golden ticket. As we had another non-elim, Ru got crafting and booted DeJa and Jorgeous in a double elimination. Only to decide that neither Angeria nor Willow deserved to miss out on a place in the finale, giving us our first ever top five.

While poor Angeria was eventually cut on finale night, alongside Daya and Bosco, Willow’s reprieve landed her the crown after a mindblowing lip sync against Camden. And well, I am absolutely thrilled for her.

On paper, Camden may have had the stronger track record but Willow’s consistent place among the top queens and her general star power always made her my favourite. In life and for the crown. I mean, list of ten of the most iconic looks of the season and Willow would be half of them. On top of that she is funny, can dance, is kind and just so damn cool. Which is why she more than deserved the crown and the piping hot Willow Country Poil.

I talk a lot of shit about seafood, particularly crustaceans since we all learned from Drop Dead Gorgeous, you just don’t know when they last cleaned their house. But a good ol’ Low Country Boil is a dish I will gladly make an exception for. Spicy, sweet and wholy life affirming, this southern classic is near perfection.

Enjoy!

Willow Country Poil
Serves: 6.

Ingredients
100g old bay or cajun seasoning
2kg small washed potatoes
3 medium red onions, peeled and thickly sliced
1kg smoked pork sausage, cut into thick coins
8 corn ears, cut in half
1.5kg prawns

Method
Half-fill a large stockpot with water and stir in the seasoning. Bring to a rollicking boil and add the potatoes to the pot and bring back to the boil, cooking for 5 minutes. Add the onions and sausage and cook for 15 minutes, before adding the corn and cooking for another 10 minutes, or until the potatoes are cooked through. Stir in the prawns and cook until they turn pink, aka are cooked. 

Drain the food into a colander, discarding the liquid, and serving on a platter. Or newspaper if you’re less uptight/scared of eating outside due to birds than me.


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Vegetable Samontha Gash

Australian Survivor, Australian Survivor: Blood V Water, Snack, Tapas, TV, TV Recap, Vegetarian

Previously on Australian Survivor the trio of returnees were ready to create some chaos, though sadly, were still tragically outnumbered. Thankfully, at the auction, KJ scored herself an advantage after bidding on a pot of tea. After the alliance locked in the vote against Jordie, Mark and Sam left their idols back at camp before KJ gagged the tribe by announcing her advantage was to send three people back to camp prior to the vote. After shoo-ing away Chrissy, Mark and an immune Josh, the purgatory trio finally had the numbers but after Sam convinced them all she had an idol in her pocket, they flipped the vote to Jordan and sent him from the game instead.

Back at camp Chrissy, Mark and Josh were shocked to discover that Jordan went home, with Josh particularly seething and as such, was ready to get revenge on anyone involved. As Josh straight up threatened Dave, Mark jumped in to tell him how stupid he is while Sam rightly praised him for making a move. She tried to calm down the enraged duo and Chrissy, while Josh just focused on how stupid their move was. When it was literally the only bloody option. Get a grip, man!

The next day the mood was still super tense, though Jordie was living his best life. Full of pride to have gotten KJ out of her shell and ready to dominate the game. He opened up about the logic to target Jordan, while Chrissy was telling the tribe how she originally thought three people were going home, so admitted to being a little relieved to have just lost Jordan. While KJ was telling Sam about how proud she was to have gotten the full Survivor experience, Josh continued to carry on, muttering about how she just painted a target on her back and that he would be getting her back ASAP.

Sam and Mark caught up to celebrate being the last couple left in the game, while Sam questioned whether they should get rid of one of their idols by burying it. She opened up about doing a double degree in law and acting, which yeah, shows she can argue a case and is a good liar but mainly I just find it a super fun fact. The marrieds agreed that while Josh desperately wants to take out KJ, that is not in their best interest and as such, they need to keep what is left of their alliance together and get rid of Jordie.

Josh meanwhile continued to be angry, but assured us he will use that rage to take out immunity again and get rid of that newly pesky KJ. Chrissy dropped by to chat to Josh, and admitted that she had time to think and suggested now would be the right time to take out Mark and Sam. But try as she might, laying out logical argument after logical argument, Josh just couldn’t bring himself to even try to flush their idol(s). And now would be a great time to remind everyone that he was sold as a mastermind for a couple of episodes.

The tribe joined Jonathan for the latest immunity challenge where they would roll a ball up a ramp and try to build a line of blocks at the bottom so that once built, the ball knocks them over like dominos until it is long enough for one of them to drop in a bucket at the end. Mark, Josh and Jordie got out to the earliest of leads, while Shay straight up smacked herself in the face with the ball before Jordie knocked over his stack. As Dave tried to close the gap, KJ dropped hers, followed by Mark and well, I’ll cut to the chase. Everyone was back and forth, knocking over their stacks before Mark rebuilt and secured himself immunity.

Back at camp things were once again intense as Sam, Mark, Chrissy and Josh joined together to plot a new move. While Mark rightly pointed out that he doesn’t want to align with anyone that had already been voted out, he suggested that Josh or Chrissy would be able to lure Dave back to their side and take back control. Speaking of Dave, he and the purgathree were continuing to plan to get rid of Sam. Jordie pulled Josh aside to float the idea of him joining their side and get rid of the final couple and then continuing to work together until the end, alternating being the one to decide who should go home.

While Josh agreed that neither Sam or Mark would be willing to take him to the end, he still felt it was a ‘dog move’ to turn on them. Which again, is the game. But him turning on them, based on his history, is the perfect cover to avoid the idol being played. Dave traded out with Jordie, apologising to Josh for voting out Jordan before throwing Sam under the bus as the one person that pushed for Jordan to go home. And as such, Josh finally felt angry enough to make a move. A very logical, and arguably the only move he can make if he has any interest in winning. Josh started to simmer based on this new information – which again, shouldn’t have been needed – and seriously considered turning on Mark and Sam.

Even though Sam was solely acting out of self-preservation. But who cares, we’re getting a move, so let’s ignore the facts.

Speaking of which, the couple left the shelter to figure out their plan of attack. Sam rightly pointed out that tonight’s tribal council will decide how the endgame will look. And if they lose, their alliance will go out back to back to back. Mark meanwhile felt that Dave will gladly flip back to their alliance, given he doesn’t even like Jordie. Though they did agree to take the idols to tribal council as insurance, while Sam was confident they wouldn’t vote for her out of fear of the idol. Which is exactly what they were locking in, as Jordie met up with his allies to tell them that he is hopeful Josh may finally flip to their side.

At tribal council Josh spoke about his pain at having lost his cousin, though was grateful to have an alliance that he trusts. He continued to talk about his desire to get revenge, and was grateful to not have to worry about any stupid advantages. Dave spoke up, talking about how Sam played everyone at the last tribal council which confirmed her fears that Dave wasn’t with them. This led to a lot of whispering back and forth, with Josh starting to get paranoid about not being on the right side of the numbers and as such, questioned whether he and Chrissy should flip.

Sam started to worry and suggested that they will need to play an idol, which Mark quickly shut down though did admit to Jonathan that tonight’s tribal council is very important. Mark and Josh then whispered about whether they should be concerned, with Josh assuring him to just play it safe. Jordie praised Josh for playing a good game and reacting appropriately to Jordan’s boot, while Sam reminded everyone that Josh has been completely loyal throughout the game. Chrissy and Josh then whispered, with Chrissy pointing out that Jordan appeared to be giving Sam deathies and willing them to vote her out. Before Jordie and Sam each reiterated their last minute pitches.

With that, the tribe voted, Josh told Mark to play the idol for Sam but when he didn’t give them a reason, they hesitated and missed the opportunity which proved to be a huge mistake as Josh had joined with the outcasts to boot Sam from the game.  Much to the absolute delight of the jury.

As soon as I saw Sam walking into the Jury Villa, I ran to her and pulled her in for a massive hug. While at times the game has been boring, it was in no small part due to the absolute dominance of Ms. Samantha Gash, our paranoid queen. I congratulated her on returning to the game having learnt her lessons from her first (iconic) season, which led to her controlling the entire pre-merge portion of the game and wisely not targeting Sandra. While yes, her post-merge game was essentially falling on her sword for Mark, it is hard to fault in a Blood vs Water season as the duo have to decide what path gives them the best opportunity to win. And given the amount of alphas on the jury, it makes sense to prioritise Mark because sexism will always come into play (read: Chrissy losing to Ben).

She was so moved by my words, we quietly sat down at the table and smashed a big batch of Vegetable Samontha Gash.

Lightly spiced and packed full of my favourite veggies – namely peas and potatoes – these babies are near perfect. Crispy pastry and piping hot potato. Need I say more?

Enjoy! 

Vegetable Samontha Gash
Serves: 6-8.

Ingredients
1 tbsp vegetable oil, plus extra for brushing
1 onion, finely chopped
4 garlic cloves, crushed
150g potato, finely diced
100 carrot, finely diced
100g frozen peas
1 tbsp curry powder
½ tsp chilli powder
½ cup vegetable stock
3 cups flour
1 tsp ground cumin
⅓ cup melted ghee
¾ cup warm water

Method
Heat the oil in a frying pan and saute the onion and garlic for five minutes, or until soft. Add the potato, carrot, peas, curry powder and chilli and cook for a minute before adding the stock. Bring to the boil, reduce heat to low, cover and simmer for half an hour, or until the potato is tender. Leave to cool.

While that is getting real cool boy, combine the flour with a good pinch of salt and the cumin. Slowly add the ghee and water, kneading as you go to create a smooth, firmish-not-sticky dough. Cover and leave to rest for half an hour.

Preheat the oven to 200C.

To assemble, split the dough into ten pieces and roll into discs. Cut each disc in half and shape into a cone. Pack with the filling and seal the ends with a dab of water to form a triangle. Place on a lined baking sheet and continue until the filling and dough are all gone.

Brush the samosas with vegetable oil and place in the oven to bake – because I’m still scared of frying – for fifteen minutes, or until golden and crisp.


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Pokato and Tatham Casserole

Australian Survivor, Australian Survivor: Blood V Water, Side, TV, TV Recap

Previously on Australian Survivor Kate was heartbroken to see Andy was booted at the first tribal council of the season before Khanh wiped it from everyone’s mind as he beasted the Water tribe to victory at the reward challenge. The Blood tribe meanwhile were growing nervous about Kate given she is Andy’s sister and could play a similarly cutthroat game, though obviously Sandra was not phased because, well, she is the threat. Despite being way behind, Blood narrowly took out the second immunity challenge. Back at camp Briana started to spiral as she searched for an idol, which was found by her closest ally leading to Khanh pushing for her to hold onto it and ultimately sending Briana home.

The next day things were far more zen at the Water tribe without Briana’s paranoia, while Chrissy was just mainly shocked to still be in the game. They hung around laughing it up, joking about Briana trying to take Jordie’s bag on her way out the door as she was so shocked by her blindside. Which is a word Chrissy just learnt, despite Briana not actually being blindsided. Chrissy and Khanh meanwhile were growing close, despite not having ever spoken of an alliance between them, Chrissy felt she could rely on him. Khanh meanwhile shared he was pretending to not care about the game as he quietly built up his resume, while cooking up a storm to charm his way through the competition. We then learnt that Khanh was ready to make a move and firm up an alliance with someone strong and as such, approached Mark to lock something in. Which Mark readily accepted, seeing the immense value Khanh offers his game.

Which ugh, I love – they started out as lovers and now they are allies!

Meanwhile over at the Blood tribe they were singing filthy freestyle ditties, living their best lives and well, making Sandra nervous since she is used to playing down and dirty. That being said, she knows that she will have to gladly blend into the background until things start to get dirty enough to take control. David was talking to Sam about his nerves for Briana while Sandra shared with us that David only played the game for his daughter and as such, he doesn’t really know what is going on which is why she will push for the tribe to vote him out if and when they go to tribal council.

Sophie, Jesse, Sam, Amy and Dave caught up by the well with them trying to figure out who they should target when they go to tribal. With David saying that Sandra needs to go ASAP to eliminate their biggest threat. While Sophie cautioned that people either want her here long term or for her to go soon, David continued his push, particularly thinking she will flourish when cracks start to form which is a perfect read on her game. While Sandra promised us she will destroy anyone that throws her name out.

And this episode is going to get very interesting soon, isn’t it?

The tribes met Jonathan by the river where David’s fears were realised as he discovered Briana became the second boot. As he tried to hold back tears he explained to Jonathan that he was surprised his baby girl was voted out and vowed that things are well and truly personal now. Sandra jumped in and agreed that the protective love of being a parent is different to all these bonds and as such, understands how he must be feeling in this moment.

But more importantly, they had a challenge to get to where one person would swim out to two pontoons and attach them to a rope, one at a time, which the rest of the tribe would pull in and then unload sandbags. Which they will use to build a tower before releasing a flare. All for the chance to visit the Survivor shop where they can select a bunch of comfort items. Jesse darted through the water and quickly got the Blood tribe out to an early lead, while Khanh valiantly stayed close enough behind despite not being a triathlete. As Jesse attached the second pontoon, Jordie tagged out at Water and despite whipping out, realised he didn’t have the rope and had to go back. 

Despite their seemingly epic lead, the Water tribe quickly closed in on the Blood tribe. More importantly, Jesse looked like a dream in his speedos and well, I continue to stan him and his brother. Particularly their style choices. Both tribes slowed down as they continued through the challenge, with Water slowly starting to close the gap. Sadly though, it was too slow as Blood built their tower and ascended to the top to release the flare and snatch their first reward.

Given Jonathan is messy, he told them that only one person would be able to go and while the tribe wanted Sandra to go, Sam stepped in and told them Dave should go since he just lost his daughter. To make things messier, David was then given the chance to take someone from the Water tribe with him, ultimately settling on Khanh because he seemed trustworthy and Dave wants answers about his daughter’s boot.

As the duo arrived at the store, Khanh was trying to hide his awkwardness about leading the charge against his daughter. We learnt that Dave could select three items, or choose to take two and give one to the rival tribe, while any advantages wouldn’t count. Immediately they spotted a twin idol which are each complete on their own, but if they are combined later in the season, they will form a super idol which can be played after the votes are read. While Khanh felt bonded by the idol, Dave didn’t want to give him any items and even when Khanh offered him information, he still refused to give their tribe any comfort.

After selecting a net, jerky and some nuts, Dave asked why Briana was voted out with Khanh diplomatically explaining it was only because she immediately riffled through the tackle box after the last reward in the hunt for an idol in front of the tribe and spooked everyone. But he assured him that she went out gracefully with a smile. Before they parted ways, the duo decided that they would wear their hats to future challenges and should someone remove their hat before, that will signal that they played their idol. Oh and we learnt that Dave’s choice to not give Khanh any items was to sow paranoia on the other tribe and have them questioning his motives. Which is far smarter than I’ve been giving Dave credit for.

As Khanh arrived back at camp, he immediately admitted that he wasn’t given everything but did share that he and Dave both found idols.Though held back the fact it could become a super idol if it joins with Dave’s. And while the plan was to create chaos, the tribe trusted everything Khanh said and were happy with his honesty.

Back at camp Dave was welcomed back as a hero. As he showed off the loot, Sandra waited to see if he owned up to any personal gain from his little shopping trip. He regaled them with a tale about how he dominated Khanh and refused to give him anything before pretending he thought he found an idol but instead was disappointed to discover it was soap. Without producing any soap. As such, Sandra was well and truly sketched out by him and even more ready to send him packing, just like his daughter.

The tribes reconvened with Jonathan where they would have to face off racing through a series of hurdles in a mud pit before chopping down two logs to climb over towers before unravelling enough chain to move a box to their mats before releasing blocks and using them to spell out a puzzle on a see-saw. Which is as big as it sounds.The Water tribe got out to the earliest of leads before Croc got a hold of the axe and quickly closed the gap and were neck and neck on the first one. Jonathan gave us the filthiest pun as the cousins ‘punished their logs’, before Water once again pulled away until Mark fell off the pole as he tried to climb over it. Despite the setback, Water continued to pull away while Blood madly tried to unravel their chest. Both tribes got to work on their puzzle with Sandra barking out the solution to her tribe while Chrissy screamed out the timings so her tribe would drop the letters at the same time and not tip the see-saw, which proved key as they took out their first immunity of the season.

Back at camp Sandra immediately got to work throwing people under the bus and enacting her ‘anyone but me’ strategy. Kate meanwhile was blown away that the game had finally begun, while Dave was thrilled given he has his super idol. Dave, Sam, Amy, Jordan, Jay, Sophie, Croc and Ben caught up at camp with Dave quickly pointing out they need to get rid of Sandra before she gets her foot in the game. While some of the others were nervous about an idol, Dave suggested they split the vote between Kate and Sandra given Kate has lost her pair. Which is a stupid move, given he also lost his pair.

Sandra meanwhile was busy charming Michelle, Jesse, Kate, Amy and Jay in the water, with Sandra admitting her game is always simple – she builds an alliance and works best with the alpha males and as such, she just needs to wait for one of them to approach her. Right on cue, Ben arrived in his speedo and quickly told her that Dave is throwing her name out and well, now Ben is my favourite player and I would die for him. With that Sandra fired right up and immediately decided to turn things on Dave, suggesting they divide and conquer to get enough numbers to quietly pile the votes on Dave and send him home. Ideally with his idol in his pocket.

Ben approached Michelle, Kate, Sophie, Jesse and Croc in the water, suggesting they all flip the vote on Dave given he is quite abrupt and without his daughter, and has become a loose canon. Ben shared that his strategy was to stick close to Sandra and learn from her so he can ride all the way to the end.

Jesse and Sam meanwhile caught up with Sam sharing that she does not want to see Dave go, given she feels she can trust him and he is more of a physical threat. While Jesse tried to explain to Jay that it would be better to keep the visible threat in, Sam wandered around camp telling everyone how stupid it would be to leave Sandra in, given her surviving just shows how good she is. Kate and Dave meanwhile were catching up with Kate suggesting that if you aren’t part of the plan, you are the plan. And that sadly made Dave realise that a lot of little conversations are going on around camp and as such, his name may now be on the block.

And shit, fuck – his idol is coming out, isn’t it?

At tribal council Sam spoke about how friendly and calm the tribe have been thus far, but admitted things quickly changed after the immunity challenge. Sandra agreed that things are far calmer in Australian Survivor, with everyone preferring to play it safe until they needed to worry, though cautioned Australians do love a blindwide. Jay spoke about needing to keep the tribe strong, which made Kate very nervous as she is one of the weaker people on the tribe and she wasn’t involved in any plans today.

Sam tried to downplay her paranoia, admitted there were so many plans and she ultimately heard a tonne of names which ended up making everyone nervous. Sandra admitted she only knew about two plans and as such, she is now worried given you’re only safe if you win immunity. David agreed that he was nervous, given he is only aware of one before thinking it was a good idea to say it made sense Sam heard so many names, given she flits from person to person strategising. Literally throwing the only person defending him under the bus.

This made Sandra smirk as Dave continued to dig a deeper and deeper hole before Sam stepped in and questioned why he was talking shit about her and asked everyone to confirm whether she had ever mentioned his name at camp. An irate Sam spoke about how the plan she had locked in back at camp had nothing to do with Dave but if he didn’t offer her something compelling, her plan may change. Dave continued to dig his hole saying that when trust is broken, he will turn on them, otherwise he is loyal.

As everyone stepped in to explain it didn’t make sense as she never flipped on him, he continued to pout as Sam straight up said she had only worked to get Dave’s name thrown out, while Sandra and Kate looked on with glee. Sam then got up and went person to person to whisper a new plan to get rid of Dave, while Jay shared his disappointment about Dave’s outburst given Sam truly did nothing wrong while Sandra jumped on the chaos and reminded everyone to make the decision that keeps the tribe united. Aka boot flame-out Dave.

With that the tribe voted, Dave rightly played his idol to save himself (from himself), which tragically sent poor Kate home with only a few votes to her name. Though thankfully, Sandra lived to fight another day. As soon as Kate arrived at Loser Lodge I started to quietly weep and pulled her in for a hug, heartbroken to see her go so soon. Without the idol, I feel like Kate would have been able to find her footing in the game and go far given she is such a kind, friendly person, but alas, David David-ed and now we’re down our first complete pair. 

Eventually I was able to dry the tears from my eyes and was able to get to work in the kitchen, toasting what could have been with a piping hot Pokato and Tatham Casserole.

It is a fact universally acknowledged that potatoes are the ultimate form of comfort. Add in some leftover Christmas ham – side note, why are parents obsessed with buying triple the amount required – cream and cheese, and well, you have culinary happiness.

Enjoy!

Pokato and Tatham Casserole
Serves: 6-8.

Ingredients
2 tbsp butter
1 onion, diced
1 green capsicum, diced
1 tbsp flour
salt and pepper, to taste
1 cup milk
1 cup vintage cheddar, grated, plus extra for topping
¼ cup Shayonnaise Swain
6 potatoes, par-cooked and diced
2 cups ham, diced

Method
Preheat the oven to 180C.

Melt the butter in a skillet over medium heat and saute the onion and capsicum together until soft and sweet. Add the flour and a good whack of salt and pepper and cook off for an extra minute or two.

Remove from the heat and stir in the milk before returning to the heat and bringing to a boil. Reduce heat to low and fold through the cheese and mayo and cook for a couple of minutes. Fold through the potato and ham.

Transfer to a baking dish, top with some extra cheese and pop in the oven to bake for half an hour, or until bubbling and golden.

Serve immediately, piping hot, and then devour.


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Cheddar, Sour Cream and Orion Story Mash

RuPaul's Drag Race, RuPaul's Drag Race 14, Side, TV, TV Recap, Vegetarian

Previously on RuPaul’s Drag Race a new batch of queens were put through their paces while the pandemic raged on around them. But that sure as hell didn’t stop them from turning a show. From Symone charming from start to finish – and all the way to crown – to Mik’s iconic Snatch Game, Utica’s kindness saving her from the Pork Chop, Kandy living her best life, Lala Ri’s bag look and Rosé being, well, professional, the dolls served. Good and bad. But thankfully, with a new year, a new batch of dolls are ready to charm their way into our hearts.

First up was my dear Alyssa Hunter looking like the love child of Serena ChaCha and Rosé out of drag – in a swoon way – and like Lady Gaga as an old timey witch in American Horror Story when in drag. She was quickly joined by Bosco looking like Sasha Velour does the devil in drag, in the best way possible. And girl, she is very competitive and ready to fight. Up next was the iconic Kornbread giving Silky in the lip-sync episode levels of perfection – energetic, charming and so damn likeable. Up next was Willow Pill as an extra from Jawbreaker, giving totally vapid delight and ugh, I love her already. I mean, the shirt said ANGLE!

Though not as much as I love Kornbread’s shade for her comfort couture shoes.

Kerri Colby came in looking like an absolute angel – not angle – in full trans flag eleganza. And damn, she was ready to be the Aunty of the season with her good Judy, Kornbread. June Jambalaya was up next and once again, she has history with Kornbread and since she likens herself to Megan Thee Stallion and Phaedra Parks, you KNOW I have no choice but to stan. Rounding out the first group of queens with a screech was Orion Story, complete with an entry paragraph and looking like a star in boudoir glam.

The dolls were gagged by Ru’s arrival welcoming them to the competition and, you know, confirming that they are but half of the dolls to feature this season. And speaking of feature, they would immediately have to compete in the first mini challenge, posing for a photoshoot on the lip sync for the crown spinning wheel with the returning Bryce and Bruno of the Pit Crew who still make me swoon-o. Alyssa was up first and hit every damn angle while June managed to serve sex despite her nerves. Willow was up next serving fully demented and charmed Ru with her name. Orion went from glamour to smut, Bosco was fierce and focused while Kerri got a stunning shot despite nearly drowning in fabric while Kornbread and Ru had the best time ever with Kornbread spinning herself around the place.

Despite Ru’s early love for WIllow and Kornbread, it was ultimately Kerri who took out the win before Ru announced that for this week’s Maxi Challenge, the dolls would be putting on a cheeky Charisma, Nerve and Talent Show to show off all of their mad skillz.

But before we could get to that, the dolls split up to find a workstation and get out of drag. With everyone gagged by Bosco and Willow’s transformation out of drag while Kornbread and June spoke for all of us by thirsting after Alyssa. Everyone turned their attention to Willow, questioning her age, which thankfully is something she is happy about, because she is ready to prove to them she is a star despite the fact they’re all underestimating her.

Oh and it adds nothing to the plot, but Kornbread convinced her new sisters that her talent would be eating hot dogs. And they believed her.

Ru dropped by to get to know the dolls with Kerri admitting her house name was inspired by Dynasty and that she is hoping to live up to the talent and showmanship of her family. Oh and she will be skipping her way through the first challenge. Literally. And again, literally, she learnt to skip at Shady Shores Elementary School. June was up next describing her looks as classy-ratchet to Ru, though when it comes to the talent show, she plans to perform an African dance. Orion admitted to being a shy reserved kid, though would be flipping the script and performing a comedy skit. Ru was still vibing with Willow Pill’s name before we learnt that she is a dear friend of Yvie Oddly’s before sharing that she has cystinosis, which is a kidney disease that causes problems with her eyes, throat and muscles. But most importantly, she described her talent as a lip sync, self-help hybrid. And again, I love her.

Oh and then Ru announced that Lizzo would be this week’s guest judge, delighting – and terrifying – her self-appointed #1 impersonator in L.A., Kornbread.

Elimination Day rolled around with Kornbread smudging her area before Alyssa shared she would be playing guitar, while Bosco will be Wagon Wheel Watusi-ing her way through a Burlesque. Kerri and Kornbread meanwhile were gabbing away while beating their mug, sharing how much they love each other and bonding over their traumatic experiences in the church. Which Kornbread dealt with by straight up farting on a priest like the damn icon she is.

CROWN KORNBREAD NOW.

The dolls were interrupted from beating their mugs by Lizzo who escaped the Green Room to give them some love and a cheeky pep talk. After she left, the dolls were fired up and ready to snatch the first win while all the girls continued to be confused about all things Willow. Which makes me sad because I love lil-low Willow already. 

Oh and then Ru performed a song from her new album and well, there were men in tight, white pants with their nips out, so I am happy. So we’ll let it slide, alright?

June Jambalaya opened up the talent show and while she slayed the performance, her headband kept falling over her face and you know Michelle will focus on that. Bosco was sultry as she stripped down, petal by petal, from her beautiful rose gown until she showed her rose bud. Alyssa confused Lizzo with her metal rocker performance and the dolls with the fact she was just air guitaring on an actual guitar. Kerri meanwhile was iconic, serving slutty schoolgirl as she lip synced before her skipping performance kicked into gear and just made me smile. Like Kornbread, just give her the damn crown, ok?

Orion was a trashy mess aerobics instructor and while I love that she went for something different, it went nowhere, until she joked about taking a massive dump which I obviously found hilarious. Kornbread meanwhile came out of the gate ready to make herself the frontrunner, nailing her performance to her own, hilarious, catchy song. Oh and she had a bag of groceries featuring a missing Merle Ginsberg on the milk carton. And that was before she even started eating her fried chicken necklace and intensely looking at the judges. Willow closed out the show and while her sisters were confused, her Enya lip sync around a bath before eating meatballs, tipping them in a bath and jumping in with a slice of toast was ICONIC.

And damn, did she finally have her sisters gagged.

On the Signature Drag runway, June served golden goddess realness while Bosco was a horny, black devil and Alyssa was a pageant-y, feathered delight. Kerri wore a stunning lion coat with a sexy bodysuit made of Ks. Orion was a red and white mushroom delight, complete with three titties. Kornbread meanwhile came out serving full Lizzo, serving eyes, face and swagger and I fucking love her. While Willow closed things out as a neon ugly-glamour mean girl.

June received praise for her performance while Michelle read her for not securing her headband and wearing control tops. Bosco’s performance was universally beloved for all that she did, while Alyssa was praised for doing something different, despite it being one note. Though the judges lived for her runway, despite the fact none of them understand who she is based on the variety she showed in the first episode. Kerri meanwhile received universal praise, despite the fact Ross wished she started skipping earlier and Michelle wanting her to lean into the stupid. Orion made Lizzo uncomfortable, and while the judges loved that she tried something different, they felt she needed more ‘funny’ in her skit. Michelle read Kornbread’s look for needing more polish, though everyone lived for her performance, none more so than Lizzo. Meanwhile Willow’s look was read for being weak, though they unanimously agreed that her talent was demented and PERFECT.

Backstage the dolls were gooped to finally be competing in the competition, talking about how wild it was to be on the mainstage. Kornbread was particularly thrilled to have made such an impression on Lizzo, while Bosco was thrilled that the judges got her. And to live up to her fellow Seattle queens, Jinkx and DeLa. Kerri meanwhile felt she would ultimately be safe which was enough for her in the first episode. The dolls all admitted that they were judging Willow for her entry look, though were gagged by how entertaining she was in her performance and praised her for being so talented as they gladly ate slice after slice of humble pie. 

Willow shared that during the performance, she didn’t think the judges were getting her and as such, got into her head and was so negative on the runway. Leading to Kornbread pointing out that she now sees her as her biggest competition and she needs to start believing in herself. June opened up about feeling like she messed up her shot by messing up some of the details. She spoke about not normally wearing tights, though worried about being judged for her body on TV and now regretting letting those fears win. Alyssa then brokedown about the pressure of feeling like she is performing for her people and didn’t want to let anyone down. Leading to a huge pep talk from all the girls AND, obviously, some flirting from Kornbread.

Orion meanwhile felt she got far and away the worst critiques and knew she’d be in the bottom, opening up that she was going to do an original song, though ran out of time due to life and as such, had to pull something together and was glad she got to show off her brand of weird. Which this time led to a pep talk from Bosco. Kornbread asked the dolls who they thought would be in the bottom with everyone kinda agreeding June will likely be joining Orion in the bottom, though Kerri assured them that because there are so few girls in the competition, the judges had to be harder on all of them and as such, they shouldn’t be hard on themselves if they do have to lip sync.

Ultimately Bosco and Willow Pill were sent to safety while Kornbread rightly snatched her first victory of the season. Kerri too was deemed safe, followed by Alyssa Hunter who narrowly avoided the bottom, leaving June and Orion to lip sync for their lives to Water Me by Lizzo. June connected with the lyrics and gave all the Lizzo swag while Orion gave campy, comedy and despite being charming and putting on a hell of a show, there was no way June was going home with that fire. As such, poor Orion became the first doll to exit the competition.

Poor Orion was heartbroken to be the first one to leave but I pulled out my old faithful pep talk, reminding her that first boots are always more memorable than the girls that go in the few weeks after and as such, she now joins the legendary group. I mean, fierce Broc-ally, Kahmora Hall, Jaymes Mansfield? There is enough talent in this group to fill an entire All Stars season!

With that wonderful reminder, Orion was ready and invigorated to go out and take on the world again. As such, we laughed, we cried – did I mention I’m a dear friend and the talent show was based around me? Because it was – and then sat down to a big, comforting bowl of Cheddar, Sour Cream and Orion Story Mash.

While I know it may feel like this isn’t an epic enough meal to be dishing out to someone post-boot, I counter that this is honestly the perfect salve. Cheese? Check. Potato? Check. Punch Flavours? Check. I mean, c’mon, sign me up.

Enjoy!

Cheddar, Sour Cream and Orion Story Mash
Serves: 4.

Ingredients
4-6 washed potatoes, cut into 2cm dice
salt and pepper, to taste
4 spring onions, trimmed and thinly sliced
¼ cup sour cream, plus extra if required
½ cup vintage cheddar cheese, grated

Method
Pop the cut potato in a large pot and rinse with water. Fill with enough water to cover with about 2cm to cover, salt like the dead sea and pop on the hob over medium-high heat. Cook for about five-ten minutes, or until tender when pierced with a fork.

Drain, return to the hot pot over the hob with the heat off and leave for the moisture to evaporate for a minute. Season to taste, add the spring onions and sour cream and mash until the potatoes are smooth. Stir aggressively, fold through the cheese and return to the lowest heat possible and cook, stirring, for a minute.

Then devour, piping hot, with your favourite protein. Or, you know, in a bowl.


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