TV Recap

Biscopper Topp Blondies

Baking, Dessert, RuPaul's Drag Race UK, RuPaul's Drag Race UK 4, Snack, Sweets, TV, TV Recap

Previously on Drag Race UK the dolls were split down the middle – kinda – to headline the Yassss-tonbury Festival. Aka Girl Groups, but make it rock. As a tertiary educated songwriter, Baby was ready to slay and take her moment in the spotlight. And while she well and truly did, nobody else on her team (other than Peppa, of course) was and as such, they landed in the bottom. And boy did they hear about it, as Baby told them all how disappointed she was backstage. Despite having the time of her life Michelle felt Starlet was all nerves while Jonbers went the Toto route and had too many lyrics for the beat and couldn’t keep up in the lip sync. As such, the duo lip synced and Starlet tragically exited.

Backstage Jonbers was a mixture of shocked and relieved to have survived the lip sync, while Cheddar was disappointed to see someone as strong as Starlet exit so soon. Jonbers opened up to the girls about how disappointed in herself she is, though trust and believe, she was ready to prove herself. Sminty pointed out that she saw Starlet as the ultimate look queen of the season and is gagged that she is gone. But also, kinda glad she is now the premiere look queen. Baby spoke about how she was gutted not to stake a claim on the challenge, though was ready to join the extensive badge club ASAP. While Cheddar just wanted Sminty to know that she and her mushroom look are not an old maiden silhouette, ok?

And, werk.

The next day the dolls were a little more zen – and Peppa looked sexy as hell – while Sminty shadily suggested that while the rival team all have a badge, maybe each of them didn’t deserve it. Baby pointed out that while she didn’t get the win thanks to her team bombing, she knows she slayed and for the moment, that is enough. And by moment, until she gets a badge. Ru dropped by to help the girls welcome our favourite season – awards! – as they voted for their sisters to win the Naff-ta awards. Oh and put on the show in their red carpet quick drag. Beast in Show – the doll with the most star quality – went to Black Peppa (as it should), Best Background Actress in a Non-Speaking Role went to Copper Topp, Best Scene Stealing, Attention Grabbing, Camera Hog rightly went to Danny Beard while Best Actress Resting on Pretty went to Baby and Best Hot Mess was deemed Sminty Drop.

With the awards out of the way, Ru announced that for this week’s Maxi Challenge they would be splitting into pairs to design looks ready for a night out at the Bingo Hall. The Brit Crew got out their balls to pair the dolls, with Le Fil getting Sminty, Baby and Dakota got paired up, Cheddar teamed with Copper, Danny and Pixie were an iconic duo which left Peppa and Jonbers together. Oh and since Sminty was deemed a hot mess, she was able to gift each pair with a box of fabrics. She jagged blue for herself and Le Fil, Dakota and Baby got black – so chic, Jamie – Cheddar and Copper got gold, Danny and Pixie got purple, leaving Jonbers and Peppa to rock acid green. Much to both of their chagrin.

The duos split up to kiki with Copper and Cheddar looking to help each other with their weaknesses, while Dakota and Baby were straight up ready to jag their badge. Sminty and Le Fil were talking styles before looking through their fabrics and regretting their choices, while Danny and Pixie were shitting on everything they got stuck with. Cheddar and Copper planned to sell luxury, while Jonbers and Peppa were thrilled with their haul. Oh and Baby and Dakota just continued to vibe, while Sminty wanted to scream over ALL the ugly fabrics.

Ru returned to check in on her daughters with Peppa and Jonbers thrilled to pull together a fashion warrior look, complete with kay-app. Copper and Cheddar sold their pairing, Baby and Dakota continued to vibe and were ready to enhance their sisters’ aesthetics – slay – while Danny and Pixie were not reinventing the wheel while Ru cautioned them to embellish a little before Sminty shat some dung to Ru talking about her feelings, rather than the concepts. And while she told Ru she was over hating her fabric, Ru told her she clearly wasn’t, but gave her a sweet peptalk and well, I love to see it.

After Ru exited, Copper wanted to make things messy, asking everyone who voted for her as most likely to fade into the background with Baby and Danny quickly owning up. While Jonbers told her she voted for her for being quiet, not a star. While Copper tried to fight against being quiet, she fought it out with her sisters while Cheddar tried to assure her that she is running a different race and to simply not worry. Because when you’re an icon like Cheddar, that is obviously how you play it. While Jonbers reminded her that Ru hates her name and as such, she had it the worst in the mini-challenge.

Everyone got quiet as they worked through their looks with Peppa and Jonbers continuing to feel good, while Copper was proud of how iconic Cheddar is while she in turn admitted she is always scared of being too drag and not ‘fashion’ enough. Sminty meanwhile made a smurf gimp mask and while it adds nothing, I love it. Baby and Dakota meanwhile continued to be perfection and honestly, is it that obvious they are winning, or are they going to be the surprise bomb of the episode? Le Fil questioned Peppa and Jonbers about how long they are taking to cut out their outfits and while they thought it was all good, I am not so confident. Just like Le Fil. While Danny felt it was all a mess.

Elimination Day arrived with Sminty unveiling a gorgeous, confident mood that made Le Fil oh so happy. Cheddar was confident in her architectural look and while she and Copper don’t look cohesive, she is confident they could sell it. Despite Copper wanting to sell Barbarella. Peppa and Jonbers meanwhile were still weaving. Pixie and Danny were kiki-ing about the latter’s boyfriend and ugh, I love hearing about how much they love each other. Pixie opened up about how she and Tia were a former power couple but after breaking up, she has struggled to be alone and to not have her biggest support system. Despite knowing Tia is rooting for her back home. Cheddar opened up to Dakota and Baby about dating as a drag queen and while it was a struggle, she is now in a happy relationship and she has learned to not care. Le Fil meanwhile spoke to Sminty about how they usually date straight men and the general struggles of finding love while being fluid.

Oh and Baby was only focused on the fact her sisters were relying on hot glue and a prayer. While Peppa and Jonbers were now just hoping to wear something.

Ru, Michelle and Alan were joined by Leomie Anderson as the dolls stomped the Bin-go She Better Don’t runway where Sminty and Le Fil served Studio 54 synchronised swimmer realness and well, I love it. Peppa and Jonbers’ looks were barely done but I loved their attitude, Danny and Pixie were glam sisters who own 51% of the company and just divorced your uncle, Dakota and Baby were perfection from head to toe – STUNNING – while Cheddar and Copper gave synchronicity good vs. evil, though Cheddar clearly outclassed her sister.

Pixie and Danny were sent to safety before Sminty and Le Fil received universal praise for the look, vibe and charm. Peppa and Jonbers meanwhile were read for filth given how unfinished their looks were despite the clear concept they were selling, while Dakota and Baby received the most effusive praise possible, giving sisters though selling themselves as individuals. And ugh, I love it, condragulations dolls. Copper was read for being too simple while Cheddar received universal praise for being iconic as all hell. And bless, I love that Cheddar tried to raise her sister up in front of the judges.

Backstage Danny and Pixie were thrilled to be safe and sound, knowing they’d return next week. Their sisters joined them, with Peppa disappointed to clearly be in the bottom, while Jonbers was heartbroken to be going in the bottom again. While Cheddar felt great, she was heartbroken the judges clearly weren’t vibing with what she served. Copper started to break down about potentially leaving, with Peppa encouraging her to fight if it comes to it. While Le Fil was hoping for a second win, it was clearly Dakota and Baby’s week and well, both of them were feeling the hell out of their oats.

Dakota and Baby OBVIOUSLY took out the win before Sminty and Le Fil were sent to safety. Cheddar clearly joined them, given she was only low by association, while Jonbers surprisingly joined her, leaving Peppa and Copper to fight for safety to Jax Jones Ella Henderson’s This Is Real. And while Peppa is obviously an assassin, giving all the lines and dominating from start to finish, Copper stole the show with all the fire as she hit every lyric. Sadly for Copper, you just can’t beat dropping into a split on the beat over eight bars, followed by voguing and as such, she was eliminated. Despite me feeling like it was more than worthy of a double shantay, but alas, it wasn’t.

Backstage Copper was still a little heartbroken to be eliminated so soon, so I pulled her in for a massive hug and reminded her just how talented she is. I then pointed to her RuPeter Badge and reminded her that even without that win, she is a star and should be so proud of herself. She had a message, she was polished and she gave all the heart. Which is well and truly worthy of global adoration and a fresh batch of Biscopper Topp Blondies.

While I am only relatively new to the biscoff cult, these blondies reminded me why the spread is so beloved. Spicy, sticky and oh so delicious, they are also super easy to whip up meaning they are perfect when you need a hit of comfort.

Enjoy!

Biscopper Topp Blondies
Serves: 8.

Ingredients
120g unsalted butter
200g biscoff spread
200g muscovado sugar
2 eggs
1 tbsp vanilla extract
200g plain flour
1 tsp ground cinnamon
½ tsp kosher salt

Method
Preheat the oven to 180C.

Pop the butter, biscoff and muscovado in a saucepan over low heat and cook stirring until well combined. Remove from heat and allow to cool slightly. Whisk in the eggs and vanilla, followed by the flour, cinnamon and salt, and stir until just combined.

Pour the batter into a lined, square baking tin and transfer to the oven to bake for 20 minutes, or until just cooked through. Remove from the oven to cool slightly before slicing and devouring.


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Nneka Peajere and Praline Danish

Baking, Dessert, Snack, Survivor, Survivor 43, Sweets, TV, TV Recap

Previously on Survivor despite bombing the first challenge Baka did as their name suggested and bounced back-a, coming together and winning immunity. I mean sure, there was still some drama in the form of Elie having to explore which of her island sons were her favourite and Jeanine going through Gabler’s bags to check if his idol was expired (it wasn’t). On Coco, Karla dominated socially, just like her tribe continued to dominate the challenges, leaving Vesi to head to tribal council. And despite Karla being a star, I am gutted she isn’t vibing with my zaddy Ryan. At Vesi, Nneka felt like she cost them the challenge, Dwight had no vote due to his visit to advantage island while Cody lost his just before heading out (though regained it). The three duos faced off with five votes in play, which led to Justine being tragically booted.

The next day Cody and Jesse caught up, with the former thrilled to have narrowly jagged his idol and managed to keep his vote. And more importantly, keep the numbers to get rid of Justine and protect his ally Nneka. Jesse on the other hand was nervous about how upset Dwight would be with him for turning against Noelle and Justine, who he wanted them to side with. Speaking of Noelle and Dwight, they were nervous to be on the outs and while they were wary of Jesse, they were willing to work with him if they needed to. Given Cody and Nneka are still super tight, which is always a problem.

Over at Baka Elie and Jeanine continued to be concerned about how Gabler was handling the elements and while he assured them he is fine, Elie was ready to get rid of him ASAP. The duo caught up with Sami to figure out how to navigate around Gabler’s idol situation, with Elie suggesting they should simply pretend it is dead and talk to him about using it as a fake ‘down the line’. Sadly for Elie, Sami wanted to be the one to talk to Gabler about it and when they shut it down, he took the information about the plan straight back to Gabler and cut them off at the knees. And while yeah, it locked in the alliance between the two boys, if Owen sticks with the girls, Sami will be the one to go home.

We checked in with Coco where the tribe were still zenning out and living their best lives as they celebrated James’ birthday and gifted him a bracelet. He then suggested they go for a walk amongst the rocks and look for an idol, which obviously got them all talking about idols and instantly paranoid. Cassidy, Lindsay and Ryan went fishing as James took a nap, leaving Karla enough time to go on said hunting expedition. And while she instantly found the Beware Advantage, once again, she opted against taking the risk for an advantage.

Back at Vesi Nneka was bonding with Dwight and Noelle, opening up about a Nigerian mission that she supports and how they inspire her to be better. And ideally win the money and be able to give back. 

We pivoted back to Coco where Karla was discussing idols with James and whether he believed there would be old school idols or just beware advantages, these days. As they were talking, she realised that her wife would want her to take a damn risk and as such, quickly snuck off to grab it. Upon learning she would need to steal beads, she quickly got to work bartering with her tribemates and making a fake necklace for her wife to get her vote back and score an idol. She was giving away earrings and beads, pretending she wanted them all to share a part of themselves with each other and honestly, it was beautiful to behold. Almost like Sandra in the opening of Pearl Islands, TBH.

Jeffrey finally arrived for this week’s Immunity Challenge where the tribes would dive off a platform, climb blocks and dive again, this time to retrieve keys before unlocking puzzle pieces. And solving said puzzle. With the winners jagging a toolkit and some fruit, while second place would get budget versions of the reward, while last place would be heading off to tribal council. After Geo took his place on the sitout bench and Noelle took off her leg, the challenge got underway with Owen getting Baka out to an early lead. Despite Karla and Noelle closing the gap on the second leg, Baka continued to stay out in front until Ryan dominated the third leg. All three tribes got to work solving the puzzle and while Vesi got out to an early lead, the other tribes closed the gap and overtook them as Nneka and Jesse grew confused. Ultimately sending Vesi back to tribal council.

As Noelle served another iconic rage face after losing.

Before sending everyone out, Baka was given the chance to send someone from each tribe to go on a journey opting for Noelle, James and Owen. We followed Vesi back to camp where Nneka was feeling bad to have lost another immunity challenge due to the puzzle, quickly checking in with Dwight to see what he was thinking. She immediately started to break down, not wanting to get rid of Noelle, given she is so inspirational. Jesse and Cody meanwhile were busy debating the merits of getting rid of Noelle who is strong or Nneka who they are tight with. Jesse opened up to us about how Nneka reminds him of his mum and worried that voting her out would be just as hard.

We checked in with the trio on Journey Island where Noelle was concerned about being away from her tribe this close to tribal council. On the journey she opened up about how her amputation impacted her life and by impact, it kinda didn’t as she is still an epic athlete and ugh, I love her. On the walk she told the boys that she is on the bottom of the tribe, offering that should they look out for her and let her have the advantage, come merge, the trio will work together to take control. And well, it worked and I love her. What an icon.

ALSO, how cute is Owen’s hoodie?

As Noelle returned to camp, Dwight was still nervous about whether they could trust Jesse to work with him and how what happened to Noelle will dictate how things go. Despite telling everyone she didn’t risk her vote, she pulled Dwight aside and assured him that she did snag an advantage. And conveniently, it was the very one they needed – a vote steal – so should Jesse give them bad vibes, she could steal his vote to take out Nneka.

At tribal council Nneka once again took accountability for losing the challenge, with Jesse jumping in and blaming himself. Nneka admitted it was quite a heartbreaking afternoon as they came to terms with losing one of their tribemates and that she was struggling with ending someone’s journey. While Cody agreed it was sad, he realised it was a game and had accepted it. Dwight spoke about finding the balance between trust and strength, while Noelle was concerned about how her journey would impact things, given she couldn’t scramble. Though she assured them she is there to prove things to herself, rather than destroy the competition. While Jesse mentioned they are also concerned that maybe Noelle also jagged an advantage on her journey.

Jeff asked everyone how confident they were that things would go their way and after they finally agreed on survey metrics, all but Noelle admitted they were very confident they were on the right side of the numbers. Which obviously meant that when the tribe voted one of them was wrong, as the tribe banded together to choose strength and booted sweet Nneka from the game.

Given she is a kind, sweet delight, she took her boot in stride and gladly thanked me for welcoming her to Loser Lodge. Nneka was a breath of fresh air in the game, at times feeling like a player from the earlier seasons in the way she quietly built up relationships and looked after the tribe. But alas, these smaller tribes leave little place for those games to survive if the person isn’t bringing it in challenges. And while that is a bitter pill to swallow, it was sweetened up by a Nneka Peajere and Praline Danish.

Flaky on the outside while all at once sticky, sweet and earthy on the inside, these decadent danishes fill you with joy. Though, I am a sucker for pastries so I am always going to say that. So why not give them a go and see for yourself!

Enjoy!

Nneka Peajere and Praline Danish
Serves: 4-8.

Ingredients
50g whole blanched hazelnuts
200g whole blanched almonds
250g unsalted butter, at room temperature
250g raw caster sugar
2 tsp vanilla extract
2 eggs
2 sheets good-quality butter puff pastry, quartered
4 firm pears, peeled, cored and halved

Method
Preheat the oven to 200ºC. Pop the nuts on a baking tray and toast in the oven for 5-10 minutes, or until very lightly toasted. Remove from the oven and allow to cool (though leave the oven on).

Once the nuts have cooled a little, pop them in a food processor and blitz until they have formed a meal-like consistency and no further. Add the butter, sugar, vanilla and eggs and blitz until well combined.

Blend the cooled nuts in a food processor or blender until finely ground – keep an eye on them and stop as soon as they’re ground or they’ll become oily. Transfer to a large bowl and add the butter, sugar and vanilla extract. Beat with a wooden spoon or electric mixer until well combined and a little paler. Using a large metal spoon, slowly fold in the eggs.

To assemble, place the puff on a clean bench and place half a pear, face down, in the centre of each portion. Dollop over some of the praline, leaving a 1-2cm edge around. Crimp the edges to form whatever shape you desire and transfer to a lined baking sheet. Pop in the oven and bake for twenty minutes, or until golden, puffed and crisp. Then, obviously, devour.


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Za’tarlet

RuPaul's Drag Race UK, RuPaul's Drag Race UK 4, Spice Mix, TV, TV Recap

Previously on Drag Race UK twelve new queens arrived and promptly paid tribute to the Spiceys’ iconic entrance at the London Olympics in a photoshoot Mini Challenge. Which Peppa promptly won, as she is an icon, despite the fact the premiere Geri Halliwell impersonator was in the building. For the Maxi Challenge, the dolls were tasked with stomping too runways in honour of the BBC and their hometown. Poor Copper, Dakota and Just May struggled, while Black Peppa slayed literally everything she did and took out the first win of the season. And more importantly demolished Danny Beard to be the Grand Supreme Blobby. Tragically it just wasn’t Just May’s week, as while she gave a solid lip sync, Dakota’s was full of fire and saved herself, leaving May to become the Gothy of the season.

Backstage the dolls were feeling the usual shock that the competition is well and truly on. Dakota opened up about the shock that it wasn’t Copper in the bottom with her while Starlet was just grateful she learnt who Geri Halliwell was, given nobody bothered to teach her in her five years in the UK. The dolls sat down for a little kiki, with Copper ready to redeem herself and prove her stint in the bottom was a one off while Peppa was thrilled to stamp her mark on the competition. Pixie meanwhile was just happy she broke the Brighton curse. And Sminty’s insides were rearranged, which is important if you ask me.

The next day the girls were feeling far more hopeful and upbeat, with Danny in particular ready for the challenge ahead. Starlet meanwhile shadily speculated over who would be the next to go before Pixie opted to focus on good things, praising Peppa for absolutely slaying. Danny pointed out the fashion queens did well last week, begging the question, how will they go with the next challenge? Which summoned Ru faster than saying Bloody Mary in a mirror, where he announced the arrival of one of the earliest girl groups challenge of all time. This year, they would split into two bands for a headlining performance at Yass-tonberry Festival with their new singles, Come Alive. Which had Baby ready to slay, given this is right in her wheelhouse.

As the winner of last week’s challenge and lip sync respectively, Peppa and Dakota were tasked with choosing their groups with Peppa snatching Baby, Sminty, Jonbers and Starlet while Dakota opted for Danny, Le Fil, Cheddar and Pixie, leaving Copper as the last one standing. And while she was smarting, she had the last laugh by getting to pick which team she sided with, selecting team Dakota. Or the winning team as she told their rivals, while Peppa was just glad to avoid having her.

The bands split up to listen to the songs, with team Peppa kiki-ing about being happy to avoid landing on team Dakota. Which totally means they are going to bomb, right? Particularly since they went with the name Triple Threat. Despite their being five of them. Pixie meanwhile suggested Team Dakota should be Shakespeare’s Fister while Danny thankfully suggested the greatest name of all time, Queens of the Bone Age instead. Pixie opened up about having a girl group pedigree, though was hopeful she would do better than bandmate Tia Kofi, who landed in the bottom on her season. Danny described their aesthetic like a band that broke up, had kids and is returning to the festival for a comeback. While Triple Threat were super confident, given Baby has a doctorate in songwriting. And while yeah, she slayed, will she be the only one on her team?

Ru made her ru-turn with songwriting icon Cathy Dennis for a bit of a masterclass, with Baby giddy to meet such a talent and likened her own writing as FKA Twigs inspired. Peppa meanwhile had Cathy in hysterics, Starlet was nervous about her shy personality, Jonbers’ lyrics were a bit bland – but what about the FAMINE?! Queens of the Bone Age traded out, with Dakota using her time in the bottom to give herself a phoenix verse, Cheddar was ready to melt, Danny dropped some F-bombs in front of Cathy while Pixie was ready to Famke Jansen her way to choking people. Oh and on Ru’s exit, he announced FKA Twigs would be this week’s guest judge which instantly blew Baby’s mind.

Queens of the Bone Age were first to record their track with Leland and Freddy, where Dakota was lacking the confidence while Le Fil was dripping in it. Speaking of dripping, Cheddar wasn’t dripping after getting rid of the melting cheese line, though damn can she sing. Copper was energetic and full of joy, Danny was a powerhouse – despite the swears – and Pixie was an absolute hilarious delight. The five members of Triple Threat traded in where Baby slayed from start to finish while Starlet was stuck in her head and Sminty gave us all of the attitude. Peppa too was perfection – duh – before Jonbers just bombed. Oh so badly. Which just breaks my damn heart, because Jonbers is a perfect delight.

When it came to learning the choreography, Dakota quickly put Le Fil in charge of Queens of the Bone Age’s performance. And well, she was born to choreograph, working around people’s weaknesses and giving them enough to make it look stunning. Despite the fact Danny was terrified about each and every moment. Thankfully though, her sisters were confident for her. And well, maybe this is RuPaul’s Best Friend’s Race after all. Triple Threat meanwhile were giving all the confidence, well, three of them were, as Starlet and Sminty struggled to get it down.

Elimination Day arrived with the dolls feeling all the oats as they split up to talk through their outfits. Bone Age locked in lime green before Dakota opened up to Sminty about how close she is to her twin and how grateful she is to have that relationship. Particularly since they were both bullied agressively at school and came out as queer together before her sibling came out as non-binary and her as trans. Despite having a stereotypically cockney father, she admitted she feels all the love from her parents, despite the initial difficulty as she came into her tran-ness. And ugh, you know I’m crying. 

On the Mainstage FKA – or is it Twigs – took her place next to Ru, Michelle and Graham as The Triple Threats kicked off the show with their debut performance of Come Alive. And oh my God, Baby was perfection from start to finish, as was Peppa. Sadly Starlet just felt lost the entire time and Jonbers was trapped in her head. Though Sminty was having fun, which was nice to see! Well, until she got backstage and brokedown about messing up some of the moves, though Baby assured her that while she was annoyed by it – lol – she will move on. When it came to the Queens of the Bone Age however, each and everyone of them knocked it out of the park, they were in the pocket from start to finish, were in sync and felt like one cohesive unit.

While backstage Baby continued to fume and was ready to tell her sisters how disappointed in them she is.

Starlet kicked off the Neon Nights runway looking like a fluffy version of Peppa’s Blobby from last week. Jonbers was a sexy neon painter, Baby was a feathered neon delight – of a feather go’a if you ask my new bestie, FKA – Sminty was a perfect showgirl jellyfish, despite thinking she looked alien and Peppa was a glorious neon yellow delight, serving ALL THE DRAMA. Again, crown her. Copper was a Shakespearean delight does new wave, while Danny was a genuine alien invasion, though coming bubbles. Cheddar then brought out hallucinogenic mushrooms delight – and oh so sexy – Dakota gave Gaga in House of Gucci, skiing at a Pokemon resort, while Le Fil was sexy in honour of Naomi Campbell collecting litter and Pixie was a bright, wet delight. 

Obviously the Queens of the Bone Age took out victory – meaning 7 of the 11 dolls have a win – before they were sent backstage to untuck before the judges read Starlet for absolute filth given she looked so nervous. SO nervous. And while she looked stunning on the runway, she needed to give more in the performance if she wanted to make it to the end. Jonbers was praised for her energy, though read for going Toto with too many syllables in her lyrics. Though they loved her runway. Baby received universal praise for each and every moment this week, though was read for standing out compared to her sisters. Ru then told Twigs how big of a fan she is, leading to some effusive praise from her hero and well, it was lovely. Sminty was read for her struggles on stage, despite the judges loving her confidence and vibe. While Michelle wanted a new silhouette. Oh and then Peppa received all the praise yet again.

Because. She. Is. Perfect.

Backstage the victors were absolutely bouncing off the walls, shocked to have taken out victory but so proud of how hard they worked. Pixie in particular was thrilled to kill it, despite the pressure she put on herself. The bottoms joined them and the mood quickly turned tense, as Peppa and Baby were disappointed to be in the bottom despite slaying. The remaining trio however were bricking it, with Jonbers ready to lip sync after her choke – which breaks my heart – while Sminty was sure it would be her joining Starlet in the bottom. Sminty was worried about serving a new silhouette, given she doesn’t want to serve old maiden, which obviously annoyed Cheddar who wanted her to realise there are more styles than sexy. But whatever. While Starlet was just disappointed that Michelle thought she was uncomfortable. Given she was having fun.

Ultimately it was Sminty that joined Baby and Peppa by being sent to safety, leaving Starlet and Jonbers to lip sync for their lives to Sugababe’s Cathy Dennis penned hit About You Now. And from start to finish, it was the Jonbers show as she served all the emotion and flipped around the stage. While it is Starlet’s vibe to serve muted, she hit every lyric and stayed true to herself. But yeah, Jonbers rightly earned her safety as Starlet sashayed away.

Backstage Starlet asssured me she was feeling ok about her elimination, like Michelle before me, I was honestly feeling like she was disappointed. Or annoyed. I pulled her in for a hug anyway and assured her that despite a short run, she showed off some stunning looks and as such, she will always have a place in my heart. Which, combined with a fierce punch of Za’tarlet, was enough to cheer her up.

Za’atar is one of the best things to add to a dish if you want a quick punch of flavour. Not every dish, obviously – this isn’t my dad and coriander in the ‘90s – but when it is right, it is right. Herby, fresh and packing a zing, it makes lamb in particular sing.

Enjoy!

Za’tarlet
Makes: ½ cup.

Ingredients
1 tbsp​ roasted sesame seeds
¼ cup ground sumac
2 tbsp dried thyme
2 tbsp dried marjoram
2 tbsp dried oregano
1 tsp kosher salt
1 tsp toasted groud cumin
½ tsp chilli

Method
Pop everything in a jar. Shake. Use, or like we did, shot like you’re Jaida and her Tajin.


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Justerrine Brennan

Lunch, Main, Poultry, Survivor, Survivor 43, TV, TV Recap

Previously on Survivor, 18 new castaways were dumped on the now traditional isles of Fiji to put themselves to the test in the ultimate game. And by ultimate, we’d all far prefer it to still be 39 days, but once again, I digress. Despite having some new editing tricks – hello drones – the dramas were the same at the three tribes as everyone had varying degrees of success setting up camp and starting fire. After Baka lost the first immunity challenge, Elie quickly flipped on her plan to lead a strong, all female alliance and instead decided to target Morriah for being weak. With Gabler immune, hair-goals Owen became the target for the other side, though thankfully his locks lived to see another day, as Elie ended the chances of the women taking control of their tribe.

Back at camp – or Baka at camp, specifically – Owen pulled the tribe together to apologise for his nervous scrambling and thanked everyone for saving him and trusting in him. Leading to Elie and Gabler admitting tribal council was a trust exercise and now that they’ve been able to prove it, the five should be unbreakable. Now Gabler was solely focused on getting the tribe fed, spirits lifted and ready to win challenges. Right on cue, an epic storm rolled over the islands and while everyone didn’t look to fare well, the fact that Baka was without a flint, means they are truly at a disadvantage. Though bless, the next morning, they used it as a learning moment and quickly decided to work on getting the roof of their shelter secured. While Owen was also very concerned about Gabler’s health, given he was clearly on struggle street after three days.

Over at Vesi, Jesse and Dwight were far less concerned about repairing after the storm and instead were hunting for an idol and talking about the dynamics of their tribe. They noticed it was kinda split into three pairs, with Nneka and Cody close, Noelle and Justine closer and as such, Jesse decided that Dwight should be his island wife. We then learnt a bit more of Dwight, who was essentially a child political journo which is iconic. After that detour, Dwight suggested to Jesse that Cody is the biggest threat and that he would prefer to align with the girls, while Jesse definitely wasn’t threatened by him, giving Cody is clearly just here for a good time. And therefore, super easy to navigate around. Someone he wasn’t vibing with was Justine who was busy making eye contact with spiders and as such, also seemed a wee out of her element.

And just like that, a duo is already divided.

Over at Coco the tribe were doing a little ballet or yoga or something, followed by some back cracking from Ryan. Karla reiterated she is literally aligned with everyone in the tribe, though she would most like to take out Geo first. The only concern being about how his bestie zaddy-Ryan would react. As the duo went hunting for nuts, Geo opened up about his coming out experience and how it ended with his parents kicking him out of home. Which is absolutely fucked and I am so glad he used it to make a life for himself that he could be proud of. And well, to put it simply, fuck his parents. Ryan meanwhile was gushing about how close he and Geo were and ugh, give Ryan the win, in addition to my heart.

Back at Vesi Noelle was talking Cody through putting on her prosthesis, which he explained to Nneka and Jesse was important to him as he watched one of his friends lose their leg and then die from cancer in High School. Which goes a long way to explaining why he is so upbeat, silly and adventurous. Flipping to Baka, Owen went for a walk to get water for the tribe where he shared to us that he was trying to keep his old-grump personality under wraps. Particularly if he were to find out everyone was hunting for idols instead of helping him keep everyone alive. Right on cue, Jeanine and Elie were busy looking for said idol while trying to decide whether they should focus on adding Sami or Owen as their third. Elie likened Sami as her responsible, independent older child while Owen is her needy baby, and given the boys don’t appear tight, she was confident pulling one in would be an easy win. Which obviously meant Sami was floating the idea of an all male alliance at that very moment.

The tribes reconnected with Probst for the next immunity challenge where they would swim to a cage, climb in and release a large snake containing number tiles, use the tiles to solve a combination and then release puzzle pieces, which they would need to solve. With the winners getting immunity and a full fishing set, second getting a few fishing items and the losers getting some face time with Probst at tribal. Given the snake was ridiculously heavy, everyone struggled to get through the first phase until Elie fell off while holding on to it which gave them the lead, while Coco and Vesi were left to nip at their heels. Well, Coco at the very least, as Nneka kinda gave up on helping with the snake at Vesi, leading to them falling way behind. So far behind in fact that Jeanine and Elie secured the win for Baka with ease, just ahead of Coco. Sending Vesi to tribal council, while Noelle looked on angrily from the sit out bench.

Which, relatable.

Back at camp the tribe got a quick little pep talk from Cody, before pivoting to scrambling with Cody knowing he would have his work cut out for himself to protect his bestie Nneka after bombing the challenge. As the girls locked in their plan against Nneka, she approached Jesse and Dwight to see if they’d be open to keeping her. We dabbed out and checked in with the triumphant Baka who were riding high on their first victory, with Elie particularly thrilled to have had the hero moment in the puzzle given she struggled at school growing up due to her ADHD and dyslexia. As the tribe discussed how best to use their fishing gear, Gabler ignored everyone’s suggestion to pop a rope on the Hawaiian sling given he had never used one and immediately put a target on his back. That somehow led to Jeanine going through his bag to get confirmation whether his idol expires after the second tribal council or his second tribal council. Which ended up being the latter, meaning she, Elie and Owen needed to figure out a way to navigate around it should they actually want to take a shot.

We returned to Vesi for the more pressing scramble with Justine approaching Dwight and Jesse to figure out a split vote plan to navigate Nneka potentially playing her shot in the dark. Sadly for her, she needed Jesse to pull it off and given Justine had already made him more nervous than Nneka, Justine girl, you in danger. Jesse caught up with his island wife Dwight to see how he was feeling about the upcoming tribal council and while Dwight was more interested in aligning with the girls to weaken Cody, by way of taking out Nneka, Jesse was also aware that Dwight does not have a vote and as such, he can’t help either way. Justine approached the duo and admitted that she wasn’t sure she could trust Jesse, which made him want her gone ASAP. And Dwight? Well, he wasn’t bothered.

Jesse approached Cody and Nneka to discuss the upcoming tribal council, giving them the deets and straight up vibing. Feeling good about getting rid of Justine, Cody turned his attention to idol hunting where he quickly stumbled across the Beware Advantage. And despite the risk, took it and immediately lost his vote unless he was able to convince each person in the tribe to give him a unique bead from their bags to activate his idol bracelet. He got to work, admitting to Jesse what happened and they set to work securing the rest. Cody decided he would wear a palm frond hat at tribal council and as such, needed to bedazzle it with beads, asking everyone to give him theirs. Which worked, for everyone but Noelle, who had already made a bracelet out of hers.

At tribal council Cody admitted they were crushed to lose immunity, before gushing about his iconic hat to Probst and how the tribe all helped by gifting him their beads. Justine admitted she would like a hat, with Cody offering to make one should she survive. She opened up about knowing she is on the block given everyone is paired up in the tribe and she hasn’t talked strategy with Cody at all. Dwight opened up about the fact everyone knows he doesn’t have a vote tonight, while Jesse and Nneka admitted that it may seem silly for him to have shared that intel, in the game it makes sense. Talk turned to the potential idol, with Nneka trying to distract while Noelle was genuinely in the dark about the situation.

Cody admitted that Dwight losing his vote likely won’t impact tribal council while Noelle felt that nobody had done anything wrong and as such, tonight was a tough decision for everyone. Though she was planning to vote for strength so they don’t have to come back. With that the tribe voted – including Cody, who was able to get the last bead from Noelle in a flashback – which tragically led to her friend Justine being booted from the game. JUST LIKE I PREDICTED BY ANOINTING HER THE MODERN ERA JESSIE CAMACHO?!

Which was not something she delighted in when I gave her a hug at Loser Lodge. She was understandably super bummed to be out of the game second but I reminded her that an iconic early boot – that is gorgeous to boot – will live on in the hearts of us gays for decades to come, just like Jesse, and as such, she should be proud of herself. And while I don’t know if it was that or the Justerrine Brennan that cheered her up, all I know is that she was happy when I exited.

While this terrine gives off big turducken energy, I assure you the pork and chicken combination is damn near perfection. Sweet, succulent and packed with a juicy-earthy punch, this is the perfect thing to feast on for dinner, or have cold at a picnic. She. Is. Versatile, mama.

Enjoy!

Justerrine Brennan
Serves: 4.

Ingredients
1 tbsp olive oil, plus extra to brush
1 onion, diced
12 rashers smoked streaky bacon
2 chicken breasts, diced
500g pork mince
⅓ cup pistachios, roughly chopped
⅓ cup dried cranberries
¾ tsp freshly grated nutmeg
1 tsp thyme leaves
1 tsp sage leaves, roughly chopped
½ tsp chilli flakes
salt and pepper

Method
Preheat the oven to 160°C. Place the oil in a large frying pan and sweat the onion over low heat for 10-15 minutes, or until soft and sweet. Transfer to a bowl.

While the onion gets chill, use 10 of the bacon rashers to line a 1kg loaf tin, leaving excess to hang over the sides. Add the chicken, pork, pistachios, cranberries, nutmeg, thyme, sage and chilli with a good whack of salt and pepper, and stir until well combined. Press the filing into the tin and fold the overhanging bacon over to seal tightly. Oil some foil – lol, rhyme – and cover the terrine. Again, tightly.

Transfer to a roasting pan and half-fill – the roasting pan, obvi – with boiling water and pop in the oven to bake for 90 minutes. Once cooked, gently remove from the water bath, uncover, drain excess fat and leave to cool.

Once cool, transfer to a baking tray and cover with foiling and pop something heavy on top – filled tin cans work best – and transfer to the fridge to chill overnight.

To serve, unmold the terrine, brush with a little oil and pop in the oven at 180°C for 20 minutes, or until golden and crisp. Then, finally, devour.


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Justriacha Mayo

Condiment, RuPaul's Drag Race UK, RuPaul's Drag Race UK 4, Sauce, TV, TV Recap

While the UK has undergone a lot of turmoil in the last few weeks, Ru, Michelle, Alan and Graham are thankfully back to provide a sense of stability. Kind of like how one Liz came into power just as one was taken from us to keep a state of equilibrium, which I’m not not saying was deliberate. Thankfully as a King has ascended, the Beeb is keeping us fed by unleashing 12 new queens on the Werk Room, starting with the iconic Danny Beard giving leather daddy realness, but make it clown. And well, I love her so. She was joined by Baby and given she gives off big Tayce energy, I LOVE her. Pixie Polite arrived adorbs, charming and old school and I live for everything about her.

If she survives the Brighton curse, obvi.

Sminty Drop arrived giving space-twink sex pot and well, maybe twinks are my thing because she is so gorgeous. More importantly, she is Gothy’s granddaughter and well, I live. Starlet arrived giving old glam and looking like Gothy and Krystal’s love child, so you KNOW she will be Ru’s fave. Jonbers Blonde arrived and stole my damn heart, giving sex AND Disney villain. And yeah, BRB, I’m drippin’. Black Peppa arrived and hot damn, while Jonbers may have my loins, Peppa has my heart. She is an icon, she is the moment, she is PERFECTION.

The world’s foremost Ginger Spice impersonator Just May – aka Alan Carr does Geri – arrived and well, I love her and how adorable she is. Or sad, if you trust Danny’s take. Dakota Schiffer arrived serving trans icon and you KNOW she is going to be the vintage fashion queen based on her Sharon Tate playboy bunny references. Copper Topp was next up and was a natural redhead, willing to teabag, so yeah, I’m into it all. Le Fil shot into the Werk Room and well, I love her; energetic, sassy and SO damn silly. And she went to school with the DDC, so you know she is going to serve it. Potentially in a silver dress and a red wig. And I DO think. Rounding out the cast though was Cheddar Gorgeous, the absolute icon and well, the dolls are quivering because this is like Bianca walking into Season 6.

I mean, everyone sat around and gushed about how she inspired them to start drag and push themselves. And well, it was glorious.

Ru finally dropped by to meet her new daughters, promptly whipping out the Brit Crew – ugh, I can’t breathe – for a Spice Girls London 2012 entrance photoshoot. Obviously Just May was up first, giving all the Geri and well, I LIVE. Particularly since Geri does Rachel Griffiths in Muriel’s Wedding. Sminty Drop was all model, Danny was perfection, Jonbers was silly and sexy in equal measure, Dakota was ethereal and beautiful while Baby looked like a drowned rat, having the best time. Copper was living her best life, Peppa looked like she was living her best life with Tyra on ANTM, Pixie was charming as all hell, Le Fil was a hairy delight, Starlet was enjoying herself despite the rains and Cheddar was 100% professional – obviously. There could only be one winner though, and that was Peppa – again, obviously – because she is a star and I love everything about her.

Before departing Ru announced that for their first Maxi Challenge, the dolls would have to serve two looks on the runway. They’d kick things off with the Keeping It 100 runway in honour of the Beeb’s 100th anniversary, while their second look – Ru Are You? – would show the judges their signature drag. In front of guest judge, my dear friend Joanna Lumley, no less!  With that, Ru exited as the dolls fought to find their place in the Werk Room and unpack, with Dakota in particular scared of being in the competition with the iconic Danny and Cheddar. Peppa meanwhile was thrilled that her BBC runway is amazing and as such, she was ready for another slay. As they took off their make-up, Le Fil and Just May bonded over their insecurities and hearing how Just May can’t see how beautiful she is breaks my heart. 

Because. She. Is.

Elimination Day arrived as the dolls were giddy to stomp their very first runways, though were also a little nervous about potentially being the one to go home. Copper, Starlet and Sminty caught up, talking about their BBC runway inspos which ranged from Ab Fab to Antiques Roadshow and ugh, this is going to be good. The dolls meanwhile realised Peppa was going to be serving Blobby which led to her calling out Danny for being one note and well, I live for it all. 

Ru, Michelle and Graham were joined by an oh so perfect Joanna as Cheddar opened the BBC Keeping It 100 as the literal test card, giving black and white, with a little rainbow clown and well, I loved it all. Jonbers served Blue Peter and well, sink me Jonbers. Le Fil gave full on Pudsey Bear, but make it model, Sminty was a glamorous antique lamp in honour of the roadshow while Baby was hilarious yet sexy as Rastamouse. Dakota was the sexiest Anne Boleyn from Horrible Histories, Danny was a sexy latex Mr Blobby, Just May gave the literal bust from Eastenders, Copper gave Julie Waters in the two soups sketch, Starlet gave Patsy in FRONT of Patsy while Pixie was glorious as Del Boy, aka an extra from the Matilda movie. Oh and then Black Peppa gave sexy Mr Blobby, making it better AND more club kid. And explaining her shady banter with Danny.

Cheddar kicked off the Ru Are You runway as a sexy deity Mad Max extra, but make it mediaeval. Jonbers was perfect as a sporty leather dame, this time with GB colours, Le Fil was a sexy red delight, Sminty was all leg, with a side of Marie Antoinette, Baby was a red, street-puff delight before Dakota gave theatre curtains, but make it model. Danny was a shimmering, shiny architectural delight, Just May was the literal personification of va-va-voom, Copper was a ginger billboard with a message, Starlet went full fairy, Pixie gave rainbow over the pier while Peppa once again demolished as a literal wrapped chocolate, despite the fact her headpiece fell off mid-stomp.

Cheddar, Jonbers, Le Fil, Baby, Danny and Pixie were sent to untuck backstage before they heaped Sminty with all the praise for giving two differing, completely polished looks. Dakota was read for clearly being nervous, despite looking absolutely stunning. Just May was praised for being stupid and funny, despite not really giving much polish, just moisturiser. Copper was praised for her polish, though was read for being a little one note. Starlet was perfection from start to finish, which is what all the judges told her before Peppa received universal praise, but even better. The better Blobby and then complete chocolate fashion, literally. Oh and then she broke down about how happy she was to be sharing herself and well, crown her already, ok?

Backstage the dolls were thrilled to be safe, none more so than Pixie who finally broke the Brighton curse. While Danny was thrilled to make it through, she admitted to the girls she hides behind her confidence because she was absolutely bricking it. The tops and bottoms returned with Dakota sure it would be her lip syncing up against Copper, heartbroken to not slay when she expected herself to. Copper too was heartbroken, while Just May opened up about how she is so nervous when out of her comfort zone. Though was hopeful her personality would carry her through. While Peppa was just super proud of herself. As she should be.

Ultimately Sminty was deemed safe, followed by Starlet leaving Black Peppa to rightly take out the very first win of the season before Copper narrowly avoided the bottom thanks to her message. Which left a gagged Just May to battle it out against Dakota to Mabel’s Let Them Know. And well, Dakota was simply not willing to be the first one to go, giving all the attitude and hitting every lyric. Just May was campy, cute and so much fun, but Dakota just pulled all the attention, in all the right ways. Which was enough to keep her in the competition, tragically at the cost of sweet Just May who became the Porkchop – sorry, Gothy – of the season.

Backstage I was, how do you say, a little bit intense, pulling Just May in for a hug and holding her by the face and telling her through gritted teeth how beautiful she is and how I need her to start seeing even half of what others see. Because she is so talented, charming, funny and a little bit silly, which is everything that makes her AND Geri great. Thankfully she wasn’t too freaked out by that, as we quickly became the fastest of friends and sat down to toast her future success with a shot of Justriacha Mayo.

I love mayo and I love sriracha, so it really shouldn’t come as a surprise to anyone that sriracha mayo is one of my favourite condiments. Secondly only to wasabi mayo, but I digress. Sweet, creamy and packing a punch, this is perfect with pretty much everything. Even the post-boot blues.

Enjoy!

Justriacha Mayo
Makes: 1 cup.

Ingredients
1 cup Shayonnaise Swain
¼ cup sriracha
1 lemon, zested and juiced
1 garlic clove, finely grated
kosher salt and pepper, to taste

Method
Combine the mayo, sriracha, lemon zest and juice and garlic in a bowl, and season with salt and pepper.

Then down in shots, or with dumplings, sushi, on a sandwich, with chips. I could go on, so just use your judgement, ok?


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Morriahti Young

Bread, Snack, Street Food, Survivor, Survivor 43, TV, TV Recap

Previously on Survivor – as you have already heard me gush – we were graced with the presence of one of the greatest personalities to take out the game, arguably since Sandra 2.0. Or maybe Tyson. Maryanne was funny, emotional and oh so charming, and watching her work her way to victory was downright delightful. Sadly though, we’ve got to drop the 2 as 43 kicked off – see what I did there, Probst – with three speedboats jetting through the water with 18 new castaways. And let’s just say, they aren’t the only things that are new – the editors have some tricks! There were drones, there were joke chyrons and even an intro for one. And it was fun.

But that isn’t what we’re here to discuss, though you know I’d gladly dedicate 2000 words to it. Survivor 43 is here and we first met Ryan, who looks like a total zaddy and I will already follow him to the ends of the earth. Nneka is cute and Morriah, for some reason, is here for RuPaul’s Best Friend Race. Sami meanwhile is my hair twin and makes up words, Lindsay is an adorable, iconic frontline hero and I stan her already, no wait, Karla is even more up my alley. Lindsay and Karla final two, please. Cody looks like a potential day 4 zaddy, Elie is going to see if she can use her psychology background better than Tori, and Owen is perfect, he is hair goals, he is THE moment.

The boats eventually made it to shore where Jeffrey proudly welcomed them to the Survivor family which immediately made Elie overwhelmed and a little shocked that it was actually happening. We first spoke with Jeanine who called Survivor a total dream for her and her immigrant father and well, I guess there needs to be more room on my stan card because I love her too. Sweet James was hoping to follow in his hero Earl’s footsteps while Gabler is the right kind of kookie to win my heart, while Paralympian Noelle spoke about how losing her leg was the best thing that ever happened to her and, gag of the season, she actually applied before she lost it. And the fact that she wants to make some leg jokes along the way makes me love her even more.

After a quick recap of the design of the game, Jeff announced they would be forming the Vesi, Baka and Coco – literally, coco – tribes. And would immediately be competing together in the first reward challenge where duos would run off one pair at a time to retrieve crates before the final duo build a cube and retrieve a key, with the first to finish earning a flint, a pot and a machete. Baka got out to the earliest of leads while Vesi nipped at the heels before they started to overtake in the water. It was then that Coco powered ahead out of nowhere, building their cube and working on retrieving their key way ahead of the others. Sadly, that proved super difficult which allowed for everyone to catch up before Dwight was given some good advice and able to jag victory for Vesi.

We first checked in with the victorious Vesi where Cody was all energy and on cloud nine about their victory. He shared that he binged Survivor during the pandemic and upon decided he had what it takes to win, was ready to live it for real. As the tribe introduced themselves, I immediately fell in love with Nneka and Justine – who is stunning – while Dwight got the clown music as he struggled to build the shelter which I hope is only the beginning of an underdog edit. Over at Baka, Gabler was nervous to already be at a disadvantage, given he is so much older than his fellow castaways, before they discovered their two options to earn their supplies, one a mental puzzle and the other to isolate two people to work hard. While Sami offered to sweat, the tribe chose to do the puzzle which required them to move two bones from a shape to create the largest number possible.

While they battled their wits, over at Coco Ryan and Geo offered to dig for four hours and while it seems like a stupid move, Ryan stripped down to his undies and as such, I’m moister than an oyster. Specifically the ones that spat on Kimmi and Monica in Second Chances. Ryan then opened up about his cerebral palsy and well, I love him even more and want him to win so bad. And that was before he even heroically dug out their reward in less than half an hour. Back at Baka the tribe continued to struggle over the puzzle, until Sami gamed the system out of nowhere and solved it for them at the exact moment I was smugly proclaiming how obvious the answer was. Which proved to be incorrect. While I sulked, Sami opened up about how proud he was to solve the puzzle despite being the youngest on the tribe and shared with us that because he is 19, he is totally planning to lie about his age to his tribe.

We returned to Vesi where Noelle was living her best life, glad to have not needed to go through another challenge to get their supplies and to have quickly aligned with Justine given they were vibing so well. Sadly for them, Nneka, Cody and Jesse noticed how tight they had become, immediately locking in their own alliance and well, Justine girl, you’re in danger. And no, please don’t make her the Jessie Camacho of the modern era because I can’t take that kind of pain again. Oh and Cody was busy targeting her for being in sales, despite being in sales himself which will totally come back to bite him, right? Right on queue, Jesse admitted he isn’t exactly sold on the alliance and as such, is willing to work with the girls, begging the question, what about Dwight?

Over at Baka as the tribe tried to build shelter, Owen was focused on building alliances. And by alliances, I mean assuring anyone in sight that he would let them know if he heard their name come up at all. Which is a great non-promise, but could still come back to bite you if people start talking. Meanwhile Elie and Morriah were bonding over their families with the former opening up about her older sister dying of an overdose during 2020 and ugh, it is heartbreaking to hear but seeing how it rallied the women together, I live. Because, duh, I always root for the all female alliances.

Coco’s shelter building meanwhile was looking to be going ok, but like Owen before her, Cassidy was more focused on building alliances. Hearing my call, those alliances were specifically with the women on her tribe and the fact that they know how difficult the game is for women, I live for it. Sadly for my love Ryan, though, they wanted to bring in James to take control over the tribe and ice out my zaddy. Baka meanwhile had changed their focus as the men started working on building a fire as Sami explained that cremating pets is not murder, but disposing of their bodies. Which I thought was obvious, but great! In any event, he made fire while Gabler wandered off to try and form a bond with Elie over heavy metal bands and do I ship this? Probably. Do I ship it as much as the two all female alliances? God no.

The next day Coco were living their best lives, getting camp set up while Karla and Geo bonded over being queer, married members of the Latinx community and fuck me dead, THIS is the final two I want now, please and thank you. Despite the fact it kinda means my love Ryan is screwed. Well, unless Karla sides with the boys, given she clearly holds all the damn power in the tribe. We pivoted to Vesi where Jesse was opening up about growing up in gangs as a teen before he turned his life around while in juvenile detention. He now had a PHD with two adorable kids and is proud to be a hope for other people and ugh, he is the sweetest. Oh and while Jesse formerly had gang tattoos, Cody had LIVIN tattooed on his butt.

After the tatt talk dissipated, Justine focused on trying to get fire started for their tribe and while she was struggling, she was happy the shelter was doing good at least. At that exact moment, the shelter collapsed before she sparked a flame. Which sadly then went out, which gives off big retrograde energy. Thankfully they were distracted by the arrival of a speedboat directing them – and the two other tribes at the same time – to select one person to get on said boat for a little adventure. While Lindsay wanted to bounce at Coco, they drew numbers with Karla winning out, Gabler won Baka’s random draw while Dwight was just allowed to go, rather than any game of chance.

The trio met up at the famed quest island – formerly the Edge of Extinction – where they were thrilled to discover they didn’t need to walk up to the top of the island, instead wading through the shallows to a large rock. Shallows that were riddled with moss and oysters, so actually more dangerous than a stroll up a hill. Eventually they made it, learning that instead of a ship wheel, they now get to openly announce whether they want to risk their votes at the first tribal council, with them each selecting their fate out of a bag corresponding with how many people chose to risk it. Ultimately Gabler and Dwight opted to risk, while Karla was wise to play it safe. And more importantly to her, avoid painting a target on her back.

Back at Vesi the tribe were still heartbroken to not have fire before Justine once again managed to get flame, and this time managed to keep it alight. As Dwight returned to camp he opted to keep things truthful, knowing that everyone knows what those journeys are all about anyway. And while he was totally honest, Cody was not buying any of it and as such started sowing seeds of doubt about him amongst the tribe. At Baka, Gabler also told the tribe the truth before going for a walk and discovering he had jagged an idol for the next two tribal councils and while everyone else celebrated with him, they seem to be ignoring the fact it means he is safe and they are not. Which is never good.

Speaking of safety, Jeffrey returned for the first immunity challenge of the season where the tribes would have to race through obstacles to release three balls, dig under a log, climb up a ramp, cross a balance beam and solve one of three table mazes. With them getting to choose which one, based on the order they arrive. Oh and sticking around from last season, the losers not only go to tribal council but have to forfeit their flint. Coco got out to an early lead while Vesi and Baka struggled to get under their logs. Specifically the latter as Jeanine got straight up stuck. As Vesi and Baka tried to close the gap, Coco landed all their balls and jagged immunity leaving the other tribes to desperately fight for the second win. Which eventually went to Vesi after they got their eye in, sending a defeated Baka to tribal council.

Back at camp the tribe quickly pivoted from disappointment to scrambling, with Sami in particular looking forward to getting their games started. Knowing he was kind of responsible, Gabler knew the target would be on his back and as such, mentioned he will not be playing his idol and instead, decided he would play his Shot in the Dark instead. Which Elie obviously thought was a terrible idea, instead telling him that they can’t afford for him to lose his vote and that he needs to pull his head in. With that out of the way, Elie, Jeanine and Owen went off and locked in the vote against Morriah, while Morriah and Sami were locking in their votes against Owen instead. Mainly because Gabler is too unpredictable to be able to trust or target. When the duo caught up with Jeanine and Elie, Elie assured us that while saying she wants to keep women strong, she wanted to focus on tribe strength. And just like that, this female alliance is already looking to be DOA.

At tribal council Sami spoke about how wonderful the vibe was at camp before losing the immunity challenge, ready to ride it out until the final 6 together. Owen agreed things were great, though suggested it instead had more to do with the fact nobody wanted to paint a target on their back. Gabler admitted that while not scrambling earlier could put them at a disadvantage, he is still glad they bonded as a tribe. Oh and then Morriah suggested they were all winners, because they tried. Sami rightly pointed out moral victories don’t keep you in the game, while Elie agreed but suggested they still need to form the right bonds too. Talk then turned to some sort of text analogies – don’t tell Teresa Giudice – before Sami reminded everyone that while they are friends, someone is about to have regrets.

Which obviously meant it was time to vote where Gabler surprisingly kept hold of his Shot in the Dark before Morriah was surprisingly chill to discover that she had become the latest member of the Sonja Christopher club. Or in Drag Race terms, the Porkchop.

As soon as she arrived at Loser Lodge, I pulled Morriah in for a massive hug and assured her that while Survivor may not be the best place to make friends, I will always be proud of the positive, kind, spirit that she brought into the game. Within a small tribe situation, it is even harder to navigate the pre-merge section of the game and when everyone is getting along and contributing like the tribe were, it almost becomes a game of lucky dip. And let’s just say, after that little peptalk and a Morriahti Young or two, she was feeling 100 again.

Despite how the kinda clunky name makes it sound, these roti – not raita – are completely delicious. Fresh, fluffy and melt in your mouth, once you’ve tried a roti from scratch, you’ll never go back to pre-bought. Particularly since they are so damn easy!

Enjoy!

Morriahti Young
Serves: 4.

Ingredients
300g flour
½ tsp kosher salt
¼ tsp black pepper, ground
250ml chilled water
30g butter, melted
vegetable oil

Method
Combine the flour, salt and pepper in a large bowl and make a well in the centre. Stir in the water until it all comes together, before transferring to a floured surface and kneading for about 5 minutes.

Split the dough into 8 equal portions and form into balls. Working one at a time, roll a ball to form a 20cm wide disc and brush with some melted butter. Roll into a cigar, then roll parallel to form into a small scroll, kind of like Inception of rolling or a quick laminate of croissants. Now flatten the scroll into a disc and roll back out to form a disc. Repeat the process with the remaining portions.

To cook, pop a heavy skillet over medium heat and brush with the oil. Add the roti and cook for a minute or two, before flipping and cooking for another minute or until golden on both sides and nicely puffed. Repeat with the remaining bread then, obvi, devour.


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Spankie Jacket Potato

Main, RuPaul’s Drag Race Down Under, RuPaul’s Drag Race Down Under 2, TV, TV Recap

Previously on Drag Race Down Under, the triplicate of Stan, TVNZ and WoW rustled up the budget to keep us fed with ocker icons for another season as ten new dolls arrived in our quaint Werk Room in Auckland. And boy were they ready to turn a party, FUCK YEAH! To get to know her newest daughters a little better, Ru put them through the one-two punch of a sausage sizzle photoshoot – tragically not in a Bunnings carpark – and had them design outfits using natural materials. Which landed Spankie in the bottom opposite Faux, who found herself becoming the Jojo Zaho of the season.

That stint in the bottom lit a fire under the iconic Spankie who dominated the next few weeks as Aubrey and Pomara found themselves exiting. Greatly improving on the OG Snatch Game, Hannah had a breakout moment as she brought Liza to the stage while the iconic Minnie was felled by Ellen. Because of course she was. 

BAB’Z were then formed – conveniently our final three – and dominated the girl groups challenge, which cost the glorious Yuri her spot in the competition. She was then followed out the door by Beverly and Molly, setting the stage for an epic finale. Despite all three of our finalists giving a branding masterclass, leaning into their strengths and delivering excellence, it was always going to be Spankie that took out the win.

From Chippies to CUM, Spankie was dripping in charisma and shone so brightly, even during her week one stumble. Which is always hard to beat, even if you’re as polished as Hannah and as talented as Kween.

After finishing her prance, I summoned her with a ‘It’s always balmy in Palmy, fuck yeah!’ and pulled her in for a massive hug as I congratulated her on a crown well won. Week after week, she gave comedy and heart and rightly won over the world, and while I didn’t reward her with chippies, she was thrilled to still have a form of potato as we toasted her win with a piping hot Spankie Jacket Potato each.

While not exactly the most polished of meals, there is something so charming and comforting about a jacket potato. Evoking memories of childhood tuckshop, it is so nourishing and delightful. Just like our newest crowned queen (conveniently timed, no?).

Enjoy!

Spankie Jacket Potato
Serves: 2.

Ingredients
2 large potatoes
2 tsp olive oil
2-4 rashers streaky bacon, diced
1 shallot, sliced
½ cup sour cream
½ cup cheddar cheese, grated

Method
Heat the oven to 200C and rub the potatoes with a little bit of oil. Place on a lined baking sheet and roast for 20 minutes. Reduce to 160C and cook for a further hour or so, or until crisp on the outside and cooked through.

When the potato is almost done, pop a frying pan over medium heat and cook the bacon until crisp and delicious.

To serve, cut a cross into the top and squeeze the sides to form a little cavern, on which you heat the bacon, shallots, sour cream and cheese to taste. And most importantly, devour.


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Karaagween Dong

Main, Poultry, RuPaul’s Drag Race Down Under, RuPaul’s Drag Race Down Under 2, TV, TV Recap

Previously on Drag Race Down Under after demolishing the makeover in their own ways – even Hannah, who narrowly made it to the finale over Molly – the top three were tasked with writing their own verses in a rumix and performing it live on the mainstage. In addition to a chat with Ru and Michelle, and a show stopping runway, obviously! Because while we have minimal budget down under, we do stick to the formula. Which is important and counts for something.

Spankie, Hannah and Kween all wisely played to their strengths, proving every step of the way that they are established, polished queens that know exactly who they are. Which made it very difficult for Ru, Michelle and Rhys to name a victor.

Despite showing perfection week after week, Hannah found herself finishing as one of our runners-up, alongside Kween dominated the finale by rapping and flipping her way around the stage. But alas, there could only be one victor and after oozing charisma, uniqueness, nerve and talent from the very first moment she appeared on screen, that was rightly Spankie.

As she took her victory prance, I quickly congratulated Hannah before returning to the mainstage to collect Kween to celebrate her run. Evidently, it was a very long prance.

I pulled her off stage and directly into a hug, thanking her for everything she gave us week after week. She (mostly) led with kindness, always trying to elevate and grow, while sharing her heritage with us. And in any other season – or a future All Stars, even – she would easily walk through the competition and collect her crown. But alas, she came up against the charisma machine that is Spankie and as such, had to settle for being a runner-up.

Given she is delightful, she laughed about how happy she was to compete and that she is nothing but proud of Spankie for her win. And happy to be her alternate. Particularly since her commiserations came in the form of a big bowl of Karaagween Dong.

There is honestly nothing better than fresh karaage don. Spiced, crunchy nuggets of chicken on a bed of creamy rice and piled with lemon, mayo and pickled ginger, it is the perfect dish for feeling both regal and iconic.

Enjoy!

Karaagween Dong
Serves: 4.

Ingredients
1 batch of Josh Karaagate Chicken
300g short grain or sushi rice
½ cup kewpie mayo (or in a pinch, Shayonnaise Swain)
2 shallots, thinly sliced
lemon wedges, to serve

Method
Start by cooking the karaage as per Josh’s recipe.

Next, pour the rice into a sieve and submerge in a bowl of cold water. Swish around and drain, before filling the bowl and repeating the process until the water becomes cloudy and starting over again fresh a couple more times. Pour the rice directly into the bowl, cover with more cold water and leave to soak for half an hour or so. Then drain into the sieve and leave over the bowl or the sink to dry for five minutes.

Pop the rice into a saucepan with 400ml of cold water. Cover, place over medium heat and bring to the boil. After about 30 seconds, reduce heat to medium and simmer for two minutes, before reducing to low and simmer for five minutes. Then crank back up to high for 10 seconds, before removing from the heat and leave to steam for at least 10 minutes before removing the lid.

To serve, divide the rice between bowls, top with karaage, followed by a generous helping of mayo and shallots. Serve with some lemon wedges if handy and then devour.


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Hannah Condahl

Main, RuPaul’s Drag Race Down Under, RuPaul’s Drag Race Down Under 2, TV, TV Recap, Vegetarian

Previously on Drag Race Down Under the top four made over members of a single extended family. Despite getting first pick of the Family Zaddy, Molly opted for the Drag Race superfan and while that is often a blessing, the fact that he knew exactly how he wanted to perform, it sadly ended up more of a curse. Kween meanwhile got a chill straight guy, who ended up blossoming under her guidance serving a Wintergreen-esque transformation. Which obviously was enough for her to snatch the win out from Spankie who obviously was just vibing with the uncle from Palmy. That meant a surprisingly lacklustre turn from Hannah meant the hobbit sisters battled in the lip sync and tragically led to Molly poppin’ back to Newie.

Backstage the dolls were sad to have lost sweet Molly, but let’s be honest, all they could really care about is the fact they have officially made it to the end and will get to compete for the crown. Hannah was proud of her run, Kween was confident and ready for the final challenge while Spankie was just an absolute delight and ready to demolish it all. And as a trio, they truly represent us, as Kween said – polished, a slut and a queen of the world. 

The next day the top three returned carrying Kween in, who was gifting us by flashing her goodies, which was just as glorious as watching a little rucap of the season, complete with all of Spankie’s glorious pep talks. Talk turned to Minnie’s penchant for fighting and ugh, I love it. Before Spankie could tell the girls how much she loved them, Ru arrived to announce their final challenge; writing and recording a verse on Ru’s own song Who Is She?, alongside a live performance on the mainstage and spilling the tea with Ru and Michelle (not to be confused with their defunct podcast). Oh and then they would be stomping the Grand Finale Eleganza Extravaganza runway.

After Ru departed, they started listening to the song to write their lyrics. But more importantly, Kween was twerking and yeah, I live. When it comes to her verse, she was planning to bring Megan the Stallion, Spankie would be leaning into her charm and Hannah, well, she was interrupted by a call from Delta Goodrem before we could learn about her plans. As the trio gave Delts a bit of a teaser of their verses, Hannah hilariously pretended she was the one that actually wrote Born to Try. Which adds nothing, but was glorious.

Kween was first to kiki with Ru and Michelle over jaffas – because duh, Down Under – with her opening up about growing up poor and how it created a lot of anxiety that she is still working through. And ugh, watching how she has come into her power is just so damn beautiful. As are dem thighs. Back in the Werk Room Hannah and Spankie were busy beating the statues’ mugs and putting them into drag, which was a scary sight as Kween returned to tag in with Hannah. She opened up to Ru and Michelle about how her parents divorce and the subsequent uncertainty led to her passion for perfection. She shared that her journey in the competition has elevated things and she looks forward to showing that to the world. Spankie rounded out the chats, sharing that she isn’t a fulltime queen and works in childcare during the day, which is ironic given she dresses like a slut. She spoke about how she lost her queer community returning to Palmy, though was so grateful for the experience. Breaking down about how much her kids mean to her.

The top three returned to the mainstage to learn that last season’s fifth place queen – and Spankie’s House of Drag runner-up – Elektra Shock was their choreographer. And well, she didn’t come to play, ready to make sure whoever wins, earns it. Kween obviously knocked it out of the park, Hannah well and truly struggled while Spankie allegedly looked like she was having a fit. And all I’ve got to say is, this and her falling on her arse is a fake out.

Coronation Day arrived with the trio splitting up to beat their mugs, with Kween ready to slay the performance while Hannah opened up about missing her partner before getting out her final letter of encouragement. As she sobbed her way through a live reading, Kween admitted that she too had letters for the competition, joining in the cry fest and well, it was beautiful to see them all rally around each other. Poor Spankie then admitted that she is ready to have another partner and to share her life with someone and ugh, I love her so damn much, crown her already. Hannah was nervous about facing Kween on the stage, while Spankie and Kween were worried about not being as polished as Hannah while Kween felt Spankie’s star power and charisma will be the true thing that is hard to beat.

Ru, Michelle and Rhys took their places on the judges panel as the trio took to the stage to perform their ru-mix of Who Is She? While Hannah gave us a delightful drunk aunt, Spankie dripped charisma all over the stage and hit every damn note, while Kween perfectly spit the rhymes while flipping all around. On the Grand Finale Eleganza Extravaganza runway, Hannah was pretty in purple, oozing regalness and looking stunning. Kween was total perfection in a gilded frond gown in honour of her heritage while Spankie was stunning in an ode to Marilyn Monroe.

The judges were proud of how consistently perfect Hannah was throughout the competition, knowing who she is and elevating it every damn time. Kween meanwhile was praised for finding herself again and for overcoming her inner saboteur, while consistently honouring her culture. Spankie on the other hand was praised for exploding into the competition after bombing the first challenge, and for just bringing so much joy. As she admitted how the competition has given her the feeling of being whole.

When it came to advice for their younger selves, Hannah told herself she was perfect and to simply try her best. Kween reminded herself she is worthy and strong and to learn to embrace all the things that she thinks are weaknesses. Spankie meanwhile was delightful and told herself to be proud, be wild and to do her, because she is enough. Hannah opened up about feeling like she deserves the crown because she wants to spread her magic with as many people as possible. Kween felt drag made herself brave enough to be a role model and by having the crown, she feels like she can help even more people. And then Spankie spoke about how hard she has worked to get here and that she was shocked to have made it to the end, but ready to take it for Palmy.

Backstage the dolls struggled to down their bevvies, reflecting on how much they are going to miss each other. And also how proud they are to have made it all the way.

They returned to the mainstage where they learnt that they would each be lip syncing for the crown, individually, to the singing budgie’s Wow. And well, it was a wow. Kween was obviously perfect, hitting every lyric and owning the stage, Hannah was polished and on point while Spankie was kooky, camp and an absolute delight. So yeah, they pretty much stuck to each of their very strong brands. Kita Mean returned to the stage to bequeath the crown to her heir looking stunning in a pink and purple metallic delight. And said heir, rightly ended up being the winner of House of Drag Season 2, Spankie Mothertuckin’ Jackson.

As Spankie got busy taking her victorious walk, I tapped Hannah on the shoulder – for no other reason than she was closer to me than Kween at the time – and told her we had to go celebrate her run together, in the biblical, culinary sense. I pulled her in for a massive hug and assured her that her run was perfect and while she didn’t take out the crown, she makes a lovely first-second alternate. And will dominate a future All Stars season, should we ever rustle up enough budget. In the interim, however, she would have to settle for the naming rights to a gloriously warming Hannah Condahl.

While it may not look like a dish worthy of someone as polished and talented, there is something so beautiful about a well made dahl. And that makes this worthy of a finalist.

Enjoy!

Hannah Condahl
Serves: 4.

Ingredients
2 tbsp olive oil
1 onion, sliced
5 garlic cloves, minced
2 tbsp madras curry paste
1 cup dried red lentils
3 cups vegetable stock
2 tbsp tomato paste
500g cauliflower, cut into florets
1 cup baby spinach, washed
1 cup frozen peas, thawed
2 tbsp coriander, roughly chopped

Method
Heat the oil in a dutch oven over medium heat. Sweat the onion for a couple of minutes, or until soft and sweet, before stirring in the garlic for a minute, followed by the curry paste. Cook, stirring for a further couple of minutes, or until the kitchen is gloriously fragrant.

It feels a little repetitive but next, stir in the lentils, stock and tomato paste and bring to the boil. Reduce heat to low, cover and simmer for 15 minutes. Next, add in the cauliflower and simmer for a further 10 minutes, or until tender. Followed by the peas and spinach, cooking for a further couple of minutes. Remove from the heat and stir in the coriander. 

Serve piping hot with some naan and yoghurt, and extra coriander if that is your thing. The most crucial part of the process is devouring.


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Alright babes?

Guess Who's Coming to Dinner, RuPaul's Drag Race UK, RuPaul's Drag Race UK 4, TV, TV Recap

While another transition of power has taken most of the press this week, Broom and Miselle are jumping back across the pond like Meg and Haz to add to their rival royal dynasty. And you just know, I’ve got big Big Kev energy going.

Aka, yes, I’m excited.

Despite my disappointment that Ella and her meek-ro-wah-vay didn’t get their rightful crown, I was once again willing to drop by and support the dolls. Particularly since if they win four challenges, they don’t get the win and frankly, I’m not laughin’ about it.

Once again, I ventured across (the very large from Australia) pond to help dull the doll’s pain after they’ve been booted from the competition and had their spirits and/or dreams crushed by way of a mid-to-low-quality meal. But, like, made with love. Which counts.

Who will be the first to drop by (disappointed after becoming the Porkchop of their season)? Check back next week for all the deets.

📷: BBC.


As you can probably tell, we are very social but the fun isn’t only limited to celebrities! You can follow us on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter and Pinterest.