Survivor

Sausage & Kaleb Pizbrewold

Main, Pizza, Snack, Street Food, Survivor, Survivor 45, TV, TV Recap

Previously on Survivor the tribe met Probst for the first official individual immunity challenge. Only it wasn’t, because as is tradition in the new era, the tribe were split into two random groups with one person winning immunity on each group. And then each group would go to tribal council and vote someone out. To make it twistier, the person that stayed up the longest would earn their group reward and a spot on the jury. As the first person out would become the final pre-juror. After Dee and her super-toes won her group reward, the losers went back to Lulu where Drew offered up Sifu as the target to save himself. And while Kendra wanted to make a move against Bruce, Kellie was able to keep them together and along with Emily, they sent Sifu out of the game and all the way home.

But back to the other group. After the challenge, we followed Quentin Tarrantino’s dream and the team off to the Sanctuary where they joyfully smashed tacos and congratulated each other on making it to the jury. As they smashed their food, Julie spoke about how nervous she was to navigate the vote. Particularly since Kaleb has proven lucky thus far and she doesn’t want it to continue at the expense of her game. Sadly for her, Jake had firmly set his sights on taking out Julie for no other reason than it could potentially weaken Dee, who he deems the biggest threat.

Back at camp Dee and Austin caught up about the vote, with Austin suggesting it would be a good idea to keep Kaleb around, given he is a bigger threat than them and as such, will always be a target. Sadly for him, Dee was fixated on voting out Kaleb again, given it is one that won’t ruffle any feathers. They looped in Jake and Julie, and while Julie was all good, Jake was sick of being told what to do and he went to talk to Kaleb. Kaleb knew his only hope was with Katurah and as such, cautioned Jake that they need to tell her about Bruce’s idol, because if she learns about it from Austin, she is likely to flip on them too. And she is crucial to taking out Julie. Assuming that in a revote, Austin would be too scared to go to rocks and as such, would eventually join them.

Kaleb caught up with Katurah and let her know the plan to spook Austin into flipping on a revote, before he told her about Bruce’s vote. Instantly locking in her loyalty knowing that while Belo are happy to keep her in the dark, he is willing to protect her. Katurah caught up with Jake so that they could run through the plans between Julie and Kaleb, and which one would take them further. She then confronted Jake about the knowledge of the idol, with him subtly pinning the blame on Kaleb and oh god, don’t turn it on my angel.

As the other group left tribal council and the future jurors filed in, Dee spoke about putting the game on pause until they returned from the Sanctuary. And how their feast was a lovely, bonding experience. Which Jake agreed with, though also pointed out that they still need to send someone to kick off the jury. Julie spoke about thinking she was going to play the game as a robot, however she realises it is heartbreaking to send someone home. Katurah spoke about the nervousness of finally being an option to go home, given she has luckily been immune thus far, while Jake admitted he just wants to work with people he thinks will take him further. Kaleb meanwhile said that he played it differently, taking his foot off the gas to show he is willing to work and they don’t need to fear him. Dee spoke about that being great and all, but reminded him that everything relies on people buying what he is selling, too. With Katurah agreeing he has no other options, so of course he is going to say it. And given all the confusion, she will be trusting her gut tonight.

With that the group voted and tragically Katurah joined the Rebas to send Kaleb out of the game, likely to become the sweetest King of the Jury of all time. As he arrived in Ponderosa, I pulled him in for a massive hug and thanked him for being such a delightful breath of fresh air all season. More importantly, he single handedly turned Emily’s game around and allowed her to shine – ignoring Hannah’s quit saving her first, TBH – and while I loved him for himself, that heroic act delivered the season, and for that we should all be grateful. Even more so than him being a total zaddy, and such glorious company to smash a Sausage & Kaleb Pizbrewold with. Particularly since it is what cursed him out of the game.

You know I have a passion for putting sausage in my mouth, and with the addition of kale, you can argue this is healthy. Kinda. A little earthy with a kick of heat, this pizza is super easy to throw together, and will have you coming back for more and more.

Enjoy!

Sausage & Kaleb Pizbrewold
Serves: 2-4, depending on need and/or hunger.

Ingredients
2 bases as per Pizsa Zsa Gabor
4 italian sausages, skins removed
4 cloves garlic, crushed
⅓ cup passata
oregano and basil, roughly chopped, to taste
1 tsp chilli flakes
2 cups shredded kale
mozzarella, to taste

Method
Prep the bases as per Zsa Zsa’s instructions and preheat the oven to 180°C.

Pop the sausage in a skillet over medium heat and cook, breaking up into large chunks with a wooden spoon as you go for a couple of minutes. Add in the garlic and cook for a further minute, or until the sausage is just cooked through.

To assemble, smear passata over the prepared bases, sprinkle with the herbs and chilli, followed by the kale and garlicky sausage before topping, generously, with mozzarella.

Transfer to the oven and bake for fifteen minutes, or until bubbly and golden.

Serve and devour immediately, eating through the pain.


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The Ritsifu Alsup

Drink, Survivor, Survivor 45, TV, TV Recap

Previously on Survivor Bruce returned for another shot at the competition, and almost instantly Katurah developed a deep hatred for his antics. And complained about him in an iconic fashion for six episodes. Sadly for her, he found an idol behind her back – with the help of the rest of the tribe, no less – just before the tribes came together for the non-merge. Kaleb was a sweet icon, winning hearts and minds as soon as they came together. Sadly for him, that led to a deep jealousy from Bruce who quickly turned the tribe against him for being too much of a threat. Thankfully Queen Emily didn’t want to lose her only fellow Lulu, so covertly told him he needed to play his Shot in the Dark. Which he promptly did, earning his safety and negating all 11 votes cast at tribal council. As such, the group had to revote and poor J. copped the stray and found herself out of the game.

Back at camp the tribe was buzzing from the excitement of tribal council, none more so than Kaleb, who congratulated everyone for making the merge. He thanked everyone for treating him with such kindness despite him being at the bottom, while everyone congratulated him for breaking multiple records on his way to making the merge. Though you best believe he knows he still has no allies. Everyone split up, with Bruce confronting Katurah in front of Drew and Austin, then Kaleb and Dee, about the fact she was on the fence about voting Kaleb and suggested that she looped him in on the need to play the Shot in the Dark. Thankfully she kept things calm in front of everyone, pulling him aside in front of her fellow Belo women, to request that he ask those sorts of questions just in front of her.

And just like that, what he thought was a brilliant play to single her out is potentially going to be the thing that ends his game. Hopefully, at least.

The next day Kaleb and Katurah caught up, with the icon quickly looping Kaleb in on the fact that Bruce is a messy, dirty rat and was the one that tried to take down Kaleb. He in turn agreed that he always felt Bruce was out to get him, given he was jealous of how likeable he was. Katurah decided to go lead the charge to get rid of Bruce instead, as unaware to her, Kendra was already talking to Kellie about getting rid of him ASAP. Sadly for the Ks and the audience, Kellie felt like she was Bruce’s number one and as such didn’t want to kill him too quickly. Kaleb and Emily meanwhile caught up, with her assuring him that she wants to work with him, but they just need to bide their time to get rid of more numbers. Emily caught up with Austin, who was vibing with his full powered idol, hopeful to coast by until he could get rid of Kellie and jag a solo steal a vote.

Austin and Sifu were doing some sort of sparring they knew before Bruce jumped in and tried to explain how to do it better, annoying everyone in the process. Kaleb looked on, laughing to himself that it is clear that Bruce only has an extra 14 hours of playing time on the rest of the cast, given he is such a mess. And far from being considered a returnee. Kaleb found Jake and floated the idea of getting rid of Bruce and while Jake wanted to work with Kaleb, he knew he needed to keep numbers for now and as such, got to work bridging the gap between them instead. However when Bruce and Kaleb caught up, Bruce went on some stupid, nonsensical story explaining life to him and yeah, Kaleb has zero desire to work with the pain in the arse.

Sensing he is dislikable, Bruce caught up with Kellie who tried to caution him about running his mouth too much and making himself a target. And while Kellie felt like she didn’t want to get rid of him, she is also exhausted about babysitting the old man. She found Jake to have a nice vent, talking about how Bruce’s mouth will be their downfall if they aren’t careful and as such, they need to lock in Emily and Kaleb to work with them. And keep Bruce as silent as possible.

The tribe joined with Probst for the iconic hold-on-a-telegraph-pole-for-as-long-as-possible challenge. You know the one, Parvati held on casually while everyone else dropped like flies. Oh and given the new era needs a twist, they’d be split into two groups with the winner of each winning immunity as tonight will be a double tribal council. And the one that lasts the longest win’s their group a trip to the sanctuary for tacos and earns the person eliminated from the group a place on the jury. Because the first person voted out will be the last pre-jury member, which TBH, is fucking brutal. And. I. Love. It.

Dee, Julie, Katurah, Jake, Austin and Kaleb formed one group, while Bruce, Sifu, Kendra, Kellie and Emily were competing for the second immunity. But TBH, we kinda know Dee and her long toes are winning this, right? Almost instantly, Emily dropped, followed closely by Queen Julie. And then Queen Kendra, our resident Drew Barrymore impressionist. Jake joined the exodus, followed by Sifu and Bruce, leaving Kellie and Drew to battle for one of the immunities. Austin dropped as Drew started to slide down his pole – yas, king – before ultimately dropping and handing Kellie immunity. She hung in there hoping for reward, as Kaleb dropped, leaving Dee and Katurah battling for the second immunity. Wait, no Katurah dropped, handing Dee the other immunity, leaving her to battle Kellie for the reward. And as predicted, Dee and her super toes slayed, as Kellie fell after 17 minutes.

Meaning Dee’s toes guaranteed everyone in her group a place on the jury.

We followed the losers as they were rightly cast aside to the old Lulu camp. Kellie apologised for screwing everyone out of the tacos, and presumably the jury. Drew caught up with Bruce, offering up a Sifu blindside given he knows the Belos have the upper hand. As he went person to person to beg, Kendra admitted that she would actually be keen to blindside Bruce so he doesn’t get paranoid or worse, idol someone out of the game. As she looped in Drew, Sifu and Emily, Bruce was busy talking to Kellie about how he thinks he is Kendra’s target tonight. Leaving Kellie to try and broker peace between her feuding allies.

Sifu and Emily caught up, with the former having a bad feeling that he will be the one to go for no other reason than everyone wants a Reba out the door. Meanwhile Kellie and Kendra were looping each other in on their relevant intel, with Kellie begging Kendra to assure Bruce that she isn’t coming for him. And while he is annoying, nobody wants to take him to the end. And if he made it, nobody would vote for him, anyway. As such, Kendra approached Drew about changing the vote to Sifu and after assuring Bruce that she wants to work with him, all appeared to be locked in. 

Nervous, Drew pulled Kendra aside to try and sway her back to Bruce. As Kendra tried to assure Bruce she wasn’t against him, he started to rail against her to Kellie, threatening to play his idol as he just can not trust her. Making everyone feel confused and chaotic as they headed out to tribal.

At said tribal council everyone spoke about how they can’t catch a break with all the twists, Drew talking specifically about the fact this tribal carries a lot of weight, given one of them won’t make the jury. Kendra wisely spoke about this tribal council affording her the opportunity to make it to the end and solidify loyalty, before Bruce shut it down saying loyalty changes day by day. Womp womp. Kellie spoke about the confusion of all the random draws and how they still await a vote where everyone is an option. Sifu spoke about his spidey sense that something is afoot and that he is confident he is a target, with Bruce agreeing that he also feels it. Though is trying to trust in the conversations he has had. Sifu, thankfully, called bullshit and spoke about there being a clear split in this group, however all he can do is sell himself as a meatshield. Kendra meanwhile spoke about how it may look like they are Belo strong, but that nobody should assume. Which Bruce jumped on, adding more mystery and confusion to the proceedings.

With that the group voted and Sifu’s gut proved correct as everyone banded together to send Sifu out of the game and all the way home, cursing him to being undateable as a pre-jury finisher. As he arrived at Loser Lodge, I pulled him in for a massive hug and lamented that while his outcome truly sucks, there is something special about being screwed by a twist in the eyes of a fan. And maybe, just maybe, that will be enough to earn him a second chance season. Or something. I was on a time crunch to celebrate his time on the island but get him to the airport before the next boot arrived, so I quickly threw together a The Ritsifu Alsup as a toast out the door.

This fresh, sweet twist on the ritz cocktail is near perfect. A little tart, rich and sweet and delightfully fizzy, it is the right level of festive fun which we truly need now. Forever. And always, TBH. Surprise pre-juror or not.

Enjoy!

The Ritsifu Alsup
Serves: 1.

Ingredients
15ml cointreau
5ml lemon juice
5ml maraschino
20ml cognac
45ml champagne

Method
Pop everything by the champagne in a cocktail shaker, fill with ice and shake until smooth and chill.

Strain into a glass, top with champagne and down. Repeat as required. Responsibly, of course.


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J. Gayatime Pudding

Dessert, Snack, Survivor, Survivor 45, Sweets, TV, TV Recap, Vegetarian

Previously on Survivor Drew, Austin, Julie and Dee formed a tight alliance on original Reba, however were now split down genderlines on new Belo and Reba. After Sean opted to quit, the Reba women focused on telling Sifu that it was J that cast a vote against him, rather than Dee. Which made sense for everyone not named J. Thankfully it didn’t reach its crescendo as the new (which is also just old) Reba won immunity and sent Belo to tribal council. Austin, J and Kellie went on a little journey and were forced to pick between amulets and sandwiches, with Austin desperate for the food though outvoted by the girls. And you best believe he was already plotting revenge before he made it back to camp. At said camp, Kendra went full Drew Barrymore and felt all the feels, while Emily was in the driver’s seat. Ultimately siding with the Rebas to get rid of Brando. And leave Kendra all by herself.

Back at camp the trio tried to assure Kendra that she is solid with them, with her wisely telling them that she completely understands why she wasn’t told. And vowed to work with them moving forward. That was all a farce, however, with Emily squarely in her sights, should she ever get the chance to go full Arya Stark. Because while she believes in karmic retribution in her real life, trust and believe she will be letting her petty flag fly on the island. And this is exactly why I live for her.

The next day we checked in with Lulu where the tribe were busy hunting for idols, with Kaleb leading the charge to guarantee that if he doesn’t have it, he at least knows who does. Right on cue, Bruce found the Beware Advantage directing him to dig under the centre of the shelter. And since Katurah was wandering aimlessly around the shore, Bruce got to digging. Well, until Katurah interrupted him. Everyone stood around awkwardly until Jake went full thespian, pretending to have dropped his ring to justify further digging. Sadly for him, a boat arrived announcing that they would soon be merging and as such, Bruce lost his chance to reclaim his vote.

Wait, no, he had ten minutes to dig and finally, FINALLY, he jagged it. Just before getting on the boat. Like a quote, unquote celebrity.

Lulu and Belo arrived at the former Reba beach to come together and jubilantly celebrate the non-merge. Kaleb meanwhile was hopeful that he and Emily were now in a power position, able to pick which original tribe to go with. But before that, they had a collection of fish to devour which led to Kendra malfunctioning and almost breaking down in tears. She was thrilled to have reconnected with Belo, quickly filling them in on Emily aligning with the Rebas. Emily meanwhile knew she may be in trouble, so pulled Bruce aside to apologise and explain she was just playing devil’s advocate on the boat when they were marooned. After talk turned to the Brando vote, they both agreed to be friendly but it was clear they were against each other.

Austin meanwhile was bitching to Julie and Dee about losing his sandwich, immediately suggesting they target J or Kellie as soon as possible. Knowing Austin needs to sacrifice his vote at the upcoming tribal council to extend the life of his idol, they got to work figuring out someone they can rally the group behind so his vote doesn’t matter, willing to throw J under the bus to weaken their broader target should it get to it.

After a torrential downpour, Sifu, Austin and Emily went for a walk to collect firewood. Before Sifu broke off and was way too much to way too many people. Emily and Kaleb meanwhile caught up to reaffirm their undying loyalty to each other before Kaleb went on a friend making tour, catching up with everyone and winning hearts and minds wherever he goes. Bruce meanwhile was left right out, worried that nobody was talking strategy with him which made him very, very nervous, given Kaleb is friendly with everything. He then confronted Kaleb due to being jealous, and while he tried to pretend he was calm, the relationship with Kaleb is clearly done. Kaleb in turn caught up with Kellie, asking for advice about navigating Bruce, however, it sadly only ended up making Kellie keen to get rid of Bruce at the earliest opportunity too.

The tribe caught up with Probst for the latest immunity challenge where they would be split into two teams to earn the merge. Because ugh, gimmicks. The groups would crawl under a muddy net to a cart, push it through the field to collect sandbags, use the sandbags to climb a tower, collect keys, then climb a boulder to ascend a platform to unlock part 1 of the 2 part puzzle. With the first group to finish the second puzzle merging, having a feast and being immune at tonight’s tribal council. And since there are an odd number of players, the odd one out would back one of the teams and join in their fate. Said unlucky soul turned out to be Katurah, who ultimately backed Sifu, Drew, Bruce, Austin, Julie and Kendra in blue.

Right out of the gate it was clear Katurah made a wise choice as the blue team got out to an early lead at the net. As they got to work pushing the cart, poor J became stuck in the net before finally making it through. It did, however, give blue an epic lead as they collected all their sandbags and released their keys before the other tribe had made it off the course. The blue team got to work on the puzzle and TBH, made it look way too easy as the red team desperately tried to make their way up the boulder, winning themselves and Katurah immunity. And tragically leaving both Lulu’s at risk.

We followed the victors to the sanctuary where they joyously got to work smashing their meal, and awkwardly waited for someone to throw out a name. Well, that is after gushing about butter, which is relatable. Who wouldn’t fuck butter?! Sifu eventually kicked things off, throwing out J with his fellow Rebas agreeing they’d be happy to get rid of her. As a counterpoint, Julie suggested Kaleb could also be a safe vote, with Kendra and Bruce quickly jumping on board, agreeing he is a massive risk and needs to go ASAP. Katurah meanwhile, wasn’t thrilled by the idea pointing out Emily is more of an island, so if they want to get rid of a Lulu, it should be her.

Back at camp, Jake was feeling very anxious about finally attending tribal council. As such, he approached J and suggested they work together, with the duo agreeing that a Lulu needs to go ASAP. While Emily looked to be the easier idea, J was more focused on getting rid of Kaleb as the bigger threat. She looped in Dee, who then caught up with Jake and gagged him by throwing out J as a potential option. The game of telephone began as Dee then looped in Kaleb, while Jake filled in Kellie, who was obviously keen to super power her amulet. 

The two groups finally came together where all hell broke loose. The Belo women caught up and immediately locked in J or Kaleb, with Katurah continuing to point out that getting rid of Kaleb tonight is a bad idea, given J weakens the other alliance. Which should be their focus. It then bounced back and forth between the two and ugh, please do not let us lose King Kaleb so soon. The Rebas caught up with Emily and told her it seems like Kaleb would likely be going home, with her cautioning them that it was too soon and that they could use his gratitude to move forward. Emily then looped in Kaleb and told him he really needs to play his Shot in the Dark before going to the Rebas and pledging his undying loyalty to them, given he now hates Bruce and wants him gone. So much so, he told everyone that Bruce has the idol.

At tribal council the remaining castaways collected their torches before Drew spoke about the information dump that was everyone coming together and how uncertain everyone was in the new group. Emily opened up about squashing the beef with Bruce, J spoke about being overwhelmed by all the new people to navigate while Sifu felt like it was chaos as everyone was inundated by a bunch of noise. Julie meanwhile felt like not everyone was strategising too hard, while Katurah was just worried about people voting for her eventually and how ultimately she feels badly for the six possible options. Kaleb spoke about continuing to be hopeful, despite knowing that he is clearly a target tonight. Emily agreed that she and Kaleb are clearly a little cursed, merge, or non-merge, be damned.

J opened up about spending the day just trying to make sure she doesn’t burn all the bridges as she moves forward. Kaleb meanwhile went the hail mary route and spoke about how while he is a physical threat, he isn’t the biggest strategically and as such, the group should band together to get rid of J. He spoke about how the Reba women have been together for two weeks, pointing out that Dee and Julie would be smart to sacrifice J if for no other reason than lowering their own threat levels. This irked Dee, asking him to potentially outline a few more threats and while he didn’t want to, Dee pointed out that what he said hardly makes her interested in working with him. 

With that the tribe voted, except for Austin who wanted to power his idol up until the final five. And Kaleb, who opted to play his Shot in the Dark. And not just play it, but play it successfully, as he pulled the scroll that read safety and jagged himself immunity as the shocked tribe cheered on. In, I repeat, shock. Particularly as Jeff tallied the votes and every single vote came in for Kaleb, breaking Kelley’s record in the process. Given there were no eligible votes in the urn, the tribe started to scramble with J and Katurah floating Emily, Emily and Bruce locking in J and everyone stopping in with Kaleb to congratulate him for finally getting some luck.

After everyone seemingly locked in the vote for Emily, they once again voted and with no tricks left to save anyone, J found herself exiting the game. As she arrived at Loser Lodge, I pulled her in for an epic hug and told her she did a good job and to hold her head up high. She then thanked me, assuring me she knows that going out at a wild tribal council is always a win. I then explained that I actually was congratulating her for her ability to bite her tongue every time Sifu said he was a songwriter. We then laughed and laughed, at the hilarity of our faux pas – and the jam sessions – before we toasted her epic departure with a delicious J. Gayatime Pudding.

This glorious little pudding is just as glorious as it is easy to make. Velvety and sweet, with the perfect set of salt and a gorgeous – albeit store bought – crumb, it has it all. And has you coming back for more and more.

Enjoy!

J. Gayatime Pudding
Serves: 8.

Ingredients
6 gelatine leaves
400g Dulce de Nick Lachey
500ml custard
3 egg whites
3 tbsp caster sugar
1 tsp kosher salt
600ml double cream, whipped to a soft peak
½ cup Gaytime crumbs

Method
Soak the gelatine in cold water for a few minutes to bloom. Squeeze out the water and add to the bowl of a stand mixer with the dulce de leche and half the custard. Whisk together on low for a couple of minutes.

In another bowl, whisk the egg whites on high until stiff peaks form. Add the sugar and salt and mix until just combined. Fold the egg whites through the toffee mixture, followed by the whipped cream, until just combined. Divide the pudding between serving glasses, cover and pop in the fridge to set for at least 4 hours. 

Once set, remove from the fridge, sprinkle with the crumbs and devour. Like a damn icon.


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Brando Meyer Lemon & Blueberry Donut

Baking, Dessert, Snack, Survivor, Survivor 45, Sweets, TV, TV Recap, Vegetarian

Previously on Survivor, after three long, losing weeks, the last Lulu’s caught a break as two of them were guaranteed to avoid the next tribal council. Because, yes, for the first time in the new era, Jeffrey switched up the tribes. And fate opted to keep things spicy for them, splitting them out across the new tribes. Emily got lucky as the swing vote between Austin and Drew, and Kendra and Brando on the new Belo. Kaleb meanwhile was stuck with the rest of the Belos on Lulu, leaving Sean with the rest of Reba on new Reba. After they lost the immunity challenge, the girls were ready to loop Sean in to blindside Sifu however at tribal council, Sean delivered the ultimate blindside by engineering a quit and bouncing out of the game. While Dee, for reasons, still voted for Sifu.

Back at camp Sifu was, in a word, pissed. Reba sat around the fire in silence until he admitted it was a massive surprise to see his name come up and while the girls didn’t want to talk about it, they eventually tried to pass it off as Sean’s vote. Sadly for them, Sean’s parting gift was to tell Sifu he did not vote for him and just like that, he cursed our queens to a rocky road to merge. Which is very un-queer of him, as us gay men should all be stanning this trio as our potential final three.

The next day we checked in with Belo where everyone was hungry, lethargic and talking about the food they would love to be snacking on. Instead of chocolate, chilli, chicken and peanut butter, Kendra found a worm and despite feeling torn – as a Libra – tried to eat it for some protein. Instead she choked on it and spat it out. Drew meanwhile was living for her energy, given she is silly, charming and keeping their spirits up.

Over at Lulu, Jake tried to keep spirits up by playing his gut as a bongo. Sadly, though, when he stood up he passed out again and ugh, this is not fun to watch. Jake meanwhile was frustrated that it kept happening and feared he would get pulled from the game. Thankfully Kellie assured him it is just that he is standing up too fast when they are starving and seeing her kindness was lovely. As was Jake opening up about overcoming an eating disorder to be here and ugh, I guess I now love Jake?

After perking up, Jake and Kaleb went for a wander to get water, Kellie and Bruce disappeared, leaving Katurah by herself. And like any worthy survivor, she immediately went hunting for idols. Sadly for her, everyone returned to camp at the same time and spotted her, and while she tried to downplay it, everyone decided she was too much of a risk to take any further. Except for Kaleb, who continues to be an icon. Though given he is aligned with everyone but Kellie, maybe Katurah isn’t as safe as I’d like. Knowing Kellie was the key to lasting longer, Kaleb approached her about forming a tight alliance. And yeah, I love him.

Back at Reba the girls were still angry, rightfully, about Sean outing them to Sifu, wishing he had just had the backbone to quit, rather than making them go through the process. We then got a beautiful moment from Dee, who opened up about her family immigrating from Cuba and I’m not sure if it is just me, but this is a winner’s edit. But back to the Sifu of it all, as the women are right to be pissed at Sean, as Sifu opened up about being a volcano ready to explode. And that he will use a fake idol he fashioned to spook the women into keeping him safe. He then caught up with Julie and J, teaching them about tai chi and pushing people, and yeah, he is an-gry.

Returning to Belo, Kendra continued to burp and entertain the people, except for Brando, who felt like out of the people on OG Belo, she was the one he had the least in common with. Thankfully for him, he found a fellow nerd in the form of Drew. After bonding over pokemon, Brando floated the idea of a nerd alliance, however Drew continued to be an icon, and told him it just doesn’t feel like a good idea, given Belo have the upper hand. Reading that as the threat it was, Brando went to bond with Kendra and the duo agreed the focus needed to be on aligning with Emily. Sadly for them, Emily had already been courted by the Rebas and TBH, I love this power position for her.

Back at Lulu, Katurah was delighting in Bruce continuing to Bruce, given he is making himself a target. Well, at least in her eyes. Luckily for her, as my fave, he was too much and everyone started to join her in rolling their eyes. Though Kaleb for one is playing it smart, trying to keep him close so that when he makes a move against him, Bruce does not see it coming.

Over at Reba, J told the girls they need to downplay their closeness, offering to go to Sifu and admit that she was the one to cast a vote against him. So that they lull him into a false sense of security, and then strike. Sadly for J, though, Dee decided that maybe it is just easier to vote J instead when they go back to tribal council. Once again though, Julie cautioned it wasn’t a great idea.

The tribes finally caught up with Jeffrey for immunity where they would race through an obstacle course to collect keys, unlock a hook and use it to collect sandbags and then shoot said sandbags and targets with the first two to knock them out jagging immunity. And a glorious or basic seafood basket. Kaleb got Lulu out to an early lead with Kendra and Sifu nipping at his heels. J closed the gap for Reba and got them out in front before Bruce snatched it back for Lulu. Julie then found the right key on her first go, allowing her to release the sandbags well ahead of the other tribes as J was first to take out a target. Lulu joined in the fun as Dee knocked out Reba’s second target. Lulu knocked out their first target before Sifu snatched immunity for Reba as Katurah took out Lulu’s second target and Kaleb their third, handing Lulu immunity and sending Belo to tribal council.

Oh and this week, there would also be a little journey and since Reba won, they got to decide who would go. J won the rock off for Reba, before sending Kellie to make up for missing out on competing and then Austin, given he may be able to give them information in the game. Much to his frustration.

Back at camp Kendra was in her feels, nervous about potentially going home. The group then opted to take a respectful approach to scrambling, so paired off one at a time to pitch their cases, with Brando and Kendra keen to target Drew with Emily, while Brando tried to convince Drew that he would hand over his Shot in the Dark if he would cast his vote for Kendra, rather than him. Sadly it all started to fall apart for Brando when Emily and Drew caught up and they compared notes, and while Brando tried to throw Drew under the bus when he caught up with Emily, I still feel like Emily is more likely to stick with Reba. 

Over at Journey Island, the trio were delighted to bond as they hiked up the mountain before they came to the pinnacle to discover their choice: sandwiches or an amulet each, which they would need to work together to use. A single amulet being an idol, two a steal a vote and all three would act as an extra vote. Austin was hungry, and knew the amulets were kinda shit as it just paints a target on his back, so voted for sandwiches, while J was firm in wanting an amulet. Forcing Kellie to break the tie, ultimately siding with J as the trio locked in an alliance to work together until the top seven. Whether Austin was interested or not, who secretly wants to get rid of them ASAP.

Returning to Belo, Emily and Drew caught up about the Kendra vote with Drew firm that it was never his idea. Emily, like an icon, told him that she doesn’t actually trust that is the truth, and while he tried to assure her that he is innocent, I’m not sure it is enough. Austin returned and bitched about missing out on sandwiches, though pretend they had to do a challenge to get an advantage. And failed. After Austin filled Drew in on the truth, Drew shared that the OG Belos are coming for him. Austin and Emily caught up, with Austin quickly assuring her that Drew is not lying to her. Particularly after he shared his newest advantage with her, highlighting that he and Drew are trusting and open with her in general.

At tribal council Brando spoke about how excited he was to finally be at tribal council, despite what it symbolises. Emily spoke about being numb to it at this point, ready for a break. Brando spoke about how powerful he thinks new Belo can be, given they’re the only tribe with connections across each of the original tribes. Drew tried to point out that more relationships mean he can’t trust he has a place in everyone’s games, while Kendra admitted she just worried about where the truth was in all of their actions. Giving off big Drew Barrymore energy in the process. Emily spoke about the importance of just surviving each and every vote – like Sandy D – while Austin admitted strength isn’t important to him, just loyalty. Which Drew agreed with, given the merge is imminent and that is where the battle would become a problem. Emily meanwhile ran the numbers and wanted to figure out the best strategy to take her to the end game.

With that, the tribe voted – Austin sacrificing and reinstating his vote to extend the life of his idol to the merge – before Emily opted to stick with the Rebas as Brando was booted from the game. As he arrived at Loser Lodge I pulled him in for a hug and told him to hold his head up high. I mean, nerd on nerd crime is hard to take (as is all intra-community trauma) but Drew has proven to be quite the enigma, giving dude bro and nerd as needed. And while that isn’t the most reassuring thing for Brando to hear, smashing a Brando Meyer Lemon & Blueberry Donut sure worked.

While you don’t technically need to use a Meyer lemon, they do have a nice sweetness to cut through the tart blueberry. But TBH, who really cares if it is a little tart when it comes in the form of a donut.

Enjoy! 

Brando Meyer Lemon & Blueberry Donut
Serves: 2 dear friends.

Ingredients
1 batch Tate Doughnutvans
1 cup raw caster sugar
200g cream cheese
½ cup Lemon Kurd Cobain (specifically meyer lemon, but no judgement)
¼ cup Blueberry Jam Hugh

Method
Cook the donuts per Tate’s recipe and once they have cooled slightly, toss through the sugar to coat.

Pop the cream cheese and curd in a stand mixer and beat with a paddle attachment until well combined.

Pipe each donut with the lemon mixture, leaving a dollop on top. Pop a little spoon of blueberry jam on top. And then, devour.


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Chicken Caesean Saladwards

Poultry, Salad, Survivor, Survivor 45, TV, TV Recap

Previously on Survivor King of the Boxer Brief, Zaddy Austin finally earned his vote back after looping in Dee and Julie about his Beware Advantage and the women promptly found the idol for him. At Belo, Katurah was over Bruce, capital O. V. A. H. Over at Lulu, Emily was mentored by Kaleb and slowly managed to form bonds with Sean and Sabiyah, and frankly started to slay. Despite winning the reward, Lulu couldn’t maintain the momentum as they went back to tribal council with Sabiyah looking to cut Kaleb as the biggest threat. Sadly for her, Emily looped him in and after Sabiyah sacrificed her vote to extend her idol – which she melted out of the wax live at tribal council – ended up voted out with said idol in her pocket.

Back at camp Sean pulled the others in for a hug, praising them for a blindside well played while Kaleb thanked Emily for keeping him in the loop and protecting him. As Sean grew more and more aware he is on the bottom, he simultaneously grew more and more shrill about how he just wished they included him in the blindside as he is thrilled to be out from under Sabiyah’s control. Sadly for him, both Kaleb and Emily realised he was performing to try and stay solid with them. The highlight being when he told Kaleb he never wanted to target him, with Emily laughing and pointing out it means he then wanted her out instead.

The next day the tribes came together with Probst where everyone was gagged to learn Sabiyah had been voted out. As they speculated about the drama of the previous tribal, Emily had a little chuckle about everyone living for the drama but pointing out it sucks to be the tribe that is split in half. As Brando questioned whether things may need a shuffle, Probst followed it up with the ultimate gag as he told everyone to drop their buffs as the tribes were switching up. New Reba was made up of Julie, Dee, Sifu, Jay and Sean, Kaleb was joined by Katurah, Bruce, Kellie and Jake on Lulu while Emily was an island at new Belo with Austin, Drew, Kendra and Brando.

Instead of a challenge, everyone was sent back to their new camps where Kaleb showed the OG Belos around the bland shelter. Bruce immediately started to break down in tears, realising Lulu was living on Tika’s beach and he started to relive the experience of being medically evacuated. He quickly rallied, assuring the tribe he just needed a moment, while poor Kaleb got to work saving himself from the bottom. Katurah asked him to tell everyone about Brandon’s journey and how he lost his vote, which obviously made Bruce realise how little Katurah trusts him. Jake pulled Kaleb aside to bond and see if there was anything there, assuring him that he would gladly vote anyone if it means they can go to the merge together and hopefully build some new alliances.

Over at new Belo everyone was excited to see Emily and get to know her away from delivering iconic sound bites at challenges. Kendra meanwhile was talking about their fishing hole and pulling together a fire, generally being an excellent hostess. As they sat down around the fire to get to know each other, Emily opened up about being on the outs of the tribe, telling everyone the entire dynamics and Sabiyah’s theatrical idol burning situation. As they got their bearings, Drew rightly focused his attention on wooing Emily so he and Austin could gain the upperhand within the tribe.

We finally checked in with new Reba where Sean gleefully started to spill the tea, talking about how he manifested the swap. Which J loved, feeling like she may have finally found someone she could truly align with. As they went off for a walk, Sifu, Julie and Dee speculated how much of a threat Sean could be, so got to work checking his bag for an idol. Sadly for them, he has an intricate way of securing his bag, so had to learn how to tie the same knots before they went through it, and learnt he was powerless. But damn, Dee and Julie are mother, no? J and Sean meanwhile were pledging their undying loyalty to each other, with J talking about how Sifu has always been on the outs of the tribe and as such, her plan would be to get rid of him at the next tribal council. J went back to the girls to let them know what she did, while Julie tried to caution her against getting rid of Sifu’s strength and sending them back to tribal again and again.

The next day things were still quite zen at Belo as Emily worried about whether she would be the swing vote or a safe consensus pick. Today she was bonding with Kendra while Austin and Drew went for a walk to decide where they could safely hide their collection of advantages. They desperately wanted to hang onto them for the merge though, so reiterated how badly they needed to get Emily. Which they promptly did, with her just grateful to have pulled an alliance together without having the looming pressure of tribal council over their head. And seeing her light up about being included and having some autonomy is just beautiful.

Back at Lulu Bruce was continuing to run at an 11. Kellie meanwhile was grateful to have played the middle at the beginning of the game thus far, given it has positioned her well for the swap. As Bruce assured her she was her number one, the duo got to work pulling in Kaleb. Sadly for them, Katurah watched it all and as soon as Kaleb was free, she pulled him aside to talk mad shit with Bruce and tried to pull him in to get rid of Bruce ASAP. And given she is calm and sensible, I think she just found herself a solid ally.

The tribes came together for the first immunity challenge as new tribes where they would have to swim to a cage and climb inside before carrying it into the shore. Then they would then have to dig themselves out to release a person to collect while the rest of the tribe would have to shoot baskets from within the cage, with the first two tribes to shoot all their basket jagging immunity. Lulu and Belo got out to an early lead, with Reba nipping at their heels. When they made it to the shore, Lulu started to pull ahead as Reba caught up with Belo as they struggled on the sand. Kaleb quickly landed two balls for Lulu before the other tribes finally joined him. Sadly it was too late as Kaleb landed his third and jagged himself immunity and flint for the first time. Austin meanwhile scored two points for Belo as Reba desperately tried to close the gap. Sadly for them, it was all for nothing as Austin landed the third one just ahead of Sifu, sending Reba to tribal council.

Sean for his fourth time in as many episodes, as Emily started to sob tears of joy for being safe.

We checked in with Lulu where Kaleb was rightly jubilant as Bruce tried to pretend he lost the flint which led to the first ever non-verbal confessional as Katurah rolled her eyes. Like a damn queen.

Back at Reba, Sean was heartbroken to still be on a losing tribe, questioning whether maybe he is the curse rather than Lulu. They caught up in the ocean where Dee made that exact joke, making Sean even more nervous than he should be. First he caught up with Sifu to talk about how close the girls are, assuring Sifu that if he wants to make a move and align with him, he will be loyal. J meanwhile was busy pointing out to Julie and Dee that it is safest to get rid of Sifu now, given if they go back to tribal council again, he could play an idol and instantly get one of the girls out. Whereas if they blindside him while Sean is still there, they could eliminate that threat. Julie was very against the idea, knowing they needed to keep strength at this point, unless they wanted to be decimated. Sadly, Dee and J were adamant and as such, they pulled Sean aside to loop him in on the plan and assured him that while they will continue to talk Reba strong at tribal, he is safe and to just hold firm.

Sadly for them, Sifu rightly grew nervous that Sean would be able to make things work with the women. While Sean just seemed dejected to be going to yet another tribal council.

Speaking of which, Reba arrived at tribal council where they spoke about how lucky they were to stay Reba strong post swap. Sean admitted he felt lucky after the swap, given he was on the outs after the last tribal council, while Julie got to work pretending the plan is to stay Reba strong. Sean spoke about how he is trying to stay and get to know everyone before J jumped in to talk about the importance of getting rid of the right people at the right time to win challenges. Sean spoke about how committed he is in challenges and how loyal he is which would be good post merge, sounding desperate to stay while Dee continued to pretend to be Reba strong and seemingly shut down his plan.

Sifu spoke about Sean’s positive energy and how much he has loved having him in the tribe, before Probst asked Sean what he has gotten from the game. Sean then gave a lovely speech about needing to learn from failure and that he loves and respects them. He admitted that growing up Mormon made him lose so much time and that playing Survivor allowed him to reclaim it, before breaking down and admitting that his adventure of a lifetime is being at home with his husband. And given how much they all want it, he would prefer they just all vote him out tonight. Jeff, obviously, didn’t love the idea of having yet another quit, as Sean admitting he is happy for them to be Reba strong and get rid of them. Probst pointed out he is simply engineering his own quit while the girls whispered to each other about granting his wish or gunning for Sifu.

With that the tribe voted and as per his request, they banded together to send Sean home. By way of Loser Lodge. Well, except for Dee who kept her vote against Sifu for shits, which seems like a bad decision. But that is a tale for another time. As Sean arrived at Loser Lodge, I pulled him in for a hug and told him to hold his head up high. I mean, I don’t love a quit, but the fact he had such a bad run in his four episodes, I kinda get it. Which is why I served up a big Chicken Caesean Saladwards on his way to the airport.

I know conventional wisdom is that you don’t make friends with salad, but it really isn’t the case when done right. And there is no salad that does more right than this. Bacon, eggs and kilos and kilos of chicken breast? Sign. Me. Up.

Enjoy!

Chicken Caesean Saladwards
Serves: 2.

Ingredients
2 chicken breasts
2 tbsp olive oil
salt and pepper, to taste
1 recipe Palesar Taulad

Method
Heat the oil in a skill over medium-low heat. Season the chicken and cook the breast for about 5-8 minutes before flipping and cooking for another 10 minutes, or until cooked though. Remove from the skillet to rest for 5 minutes before roughly dicing.

Prepare the salad as per Palesar’s recipe before dividing the chicken over the salad and devouring, with love and glee.


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Cider Mimosabiyah Broderick

Drink, Survivor, Survivor 45, TV, TV Recap

Previously on Survivor Bruce was still all energy, at an 11 at any and all moments, which continued to drive Katurah absolutely mental. And given it was annoying me through the TV, I love her even more. Kellie and Brando meanwhile were busy playing in the middle of Belo, given both the girls and boys wanted to take control with them. If they ever go to tribal council, that is. At Reba, Austin had the beware advantage and secured a majority with Drew as he emerged as an icon, against everything I was expecting. Over at Lulu, Sabiyah released the idol from the tree only to learn she had to melt it out of wax to activate it. And while they didn’t have fire, it wasn’t necessary as after Emily was reborn thanks to Kaleb’s advice, Brandon was booted.

Back at camp Emily was grateful to have been spared, with everyone agreeing that she at least contributes in challenges and as such, that is why she was kept. Sabiyah admitted she also liked her and as such, she returned her Shot in the Dark and the four agreed they could now move forward with trust. That is until Emily quickly ran the maths and realised that only three people voted and asked if one of them didn’t vote. Before she went one step further and questioned Sabiyah about whether she was the one that didn’t vote. And while Sabiyah denied it and Emily kinda let it go, it is clear that these two still have a ways to go if we want them to make it to the end.

The next day Jake was trying to breathe like into the fire and then collapsed and had a mild seizure and yeah, it was scary to watch and I don’t like it. Kendra, thankfully, was way more zen, sitting him down and making sure he was ok before grabbing him some water. The duo bonded over how much they were loving being on Survivor, before Kendra admitted that she was initially nervous of him and wanted to target him for being a lawyer. They continued to bond and be adorbs, TBH, making me feel like this womens’ alliance is over before it began.

Over at Reba, the starving tribe were contemplating what they would eat, as a crab literally hung out in their pot. Austin meanwhile was focused on jagging his idol, pulling Drew aside to stand watch. As Austin dug about and Drew loitered in the shrubs, Dee was busy asking Julie if she felt something was off between Austin and Drew. Right on cue, the ladies walked up on Drew digging and while he awkwardly wandered off, Drew expertly threw out a lie that they caught Sifu digging and as such wanted to jag whatever it was before he did. Dee being an icon, however, was wary and knew to keep an eye on the boys, lest it ruin their alliance before they even attended tribal council.

The tribes caught up with Probst for the first reward challenge of the season where they would race into shore and toss a ball into a trough before running through an obstacle and catching it. Once they get through, they would release rings and then land them on a post for massive plates of fruit. And the victors would get to loot something from one of the losing tribes. Lulu miraculously got out to an early lead and despite Emily axing herself on the first run of the obstacles, they managed to stay in front and landed all their rings before anyone even started tossing. As they celebrated, the other tribes desperately fought for second before Reba snatched it, leaving Belo with nothing.

After Reba and Belo were sent away, Lulu locked in Kaleb as their representative as he ventured off to raid. Only for him to discover he also had a Goodwill Advantage to give to one of his new friends, which grants them the power to restore a lost vote at a single tribal council. As the other tribes speculated about their plans, Kaleb arrived at Reba and quickly got to work bonding with everyone, as Sifu and J. Maya put on a little show. Kaleb then snatched their fishing gear before asking to talk to each of them one on one, before deciding to hand the advantage to Drew given he has already proven to be a gamer as he participated on the journey. Oh and then he assured them he will tell Lulu to work with them should there be a swap before he departed.

As Drew quickly looped in Austin, Dee and Julie on his new advantage.

Back at Lulu the tribe joyously smashed their fruit, thrilled to finally have a taste of victory and hopeful to be vibing with energy at the next immunity challenge. And after a full belly, Sean and Sabiyah loved Emily’s newfound energy and as such, decided they could bring her in on their alliance and potentially get rid of Kaleb if they have to return to tribal council, given he is so strong in challenges and would dominate if he is allowed to get to the final three. They then pulled Emily in to float the idea and while she knows she is on the outs and therefore would vote for anyone if they go back to tribal council, I still think she is more likely to stick with Kaleb.

Over at Belo the tribe were zen as the boys fished and lived their best lives, while the girls remained at camp and discussed Jake and whether they could work with him. Katurah obviously suggested that he would be a way better person to work with rather than Bruce. Kellie meanwhile was torn, given she and Brando are the swing votes and as such, approached him to see which way he was leaning.

Meanwhile at Reba, Austin admitted to Julie and Dee that he just found a Beware Advantage and as such, they all went hunting for the idol to help him get his vote back. Thankfully Dee and Julie found a rope, leading them to a hammer which directed them to smash a rock near the water well. Before they handed it off to Austin who finally jagged the idol and learnt it is only good for one tribal council, unless he sacrifices a vote to make it last to the merge. And if he sacrifices another vote, it would be good all the way up to the final five. And while Dee wanted to keep it for herself, she was glad they got to prove trust, as a strong alliance is worth so much more.

The tribes came together with Jeffrey for the latest immunity challenge where they would race through a course to release keys and collect puzzle pieces before using them to solve a massive cube puzzle. Belo and Reba got out to an early lead before Lulu closed the gap and started to overtake Reba. As is oft the case, the puzzle was the great equaliser as everyone grew more and more confused. And Bruce grew more and more frustrated, annoying even the rival tribes. Before Reba got the puzzle out of nowhere, quickly followed by Belo, sending poor Lulu back to tribal council yet again.

To the strings of heartbroken music, no less.

Back at camp things were well and truly flat, as everyone was angry about the fact they are the only ones that even know what attending tribal council is like. Kaleb quickly locked in the vote against Emily, as Sabiyah and Kaleb agreed to suggest the other to keep her calm enough to not play her Shot in the Dark. Oh and Sabiyah plans to melt her idol in the fire at tribal council to get her vote back. She then caught up with Emily, telling her about her idol plans and while that was done to try and build trust with her, it actually made Emily nervous about the fact she kept it a secret from her for 4 days. As such, Emily caught up with Kaleb and let him know that he is the actual plan tonight. Sadly for her though, he isn’t exactly sure about that, given that is the plan he and Sabiyah planned to tell Emily and as such, he isn’t sure who to trust.

At tribal council Sabiyah immediately got to melting her idol free as she filled Jeff in on what was going on. And damn, this is camp as hell and is 100% why I love this show. Kaleb meanwhile spoke about the camp raid and how they got fishing gear, though can’t actually cook anything yet, so at least he got information too. Emily spoke about feeling responsible for being back at tribal council, and while she would love to stay, she still feels like she is on the bottom of the tribe. Which Sabiyah agreed with, either truthfully or to lull Kaleb into a false sense of security. She then pulled her scroll off the grill to cool down as Kaleb admitted Emily spent the afternoon trying to find a way to stay, with everyone agreeing that she could have painted anyone as a target. Before Sabiyah packed her idol in her pocket.

With that the tribe voted and Sabiyah learnt about the fact she would have to risk her vote if she wanted to extend the life of her idol, which she obviously chose to do. Sadly for her, Kaleb heeded Emily’s warnings as the duo banded together to blindside Sabiyah from the game with a still active idol in her pocket.

She followed the sound of my sobbing cries all the way from tribal council to Loser Lodge before sweeping me in for a massive hug and assured me that everything would be fine. Despite only lasting a few episodes, Sabiyah well and truly left a mark on the game and arguably, will go down as one of the most iconic pre-mergers of the new era. Recency bias, be damned. After drying my eyes, I thanked her for her televisual service and toasted her return ASAP with a Cider Mimosabiyah Broderick or two.

Given we’re on a literal slay ride to Christmas, I am well and truly in the festive spirit and this little cocktail is a perfect way to start. Light and spicy, it is perfect for a Thanksgiving or Christmas brunch. Or afternoon tea. Or lunch. Or just because, hey, it’s Wednesday, no judgement.

Enjoy!

Cider Mimosabiyah Broderick
Serves: 2.

Ingredients
¼ cup raw caster sugar
2 tsp cinnamon
120ml spiced rum
240ml apple cider
480ml chilled sparkling wine
apple, sliced, to garnish

Method
Combine the sugar and cinnamon in a bowl and wet the rim of two glasses with cider. Dip in the cinnamon sugar to coat.

Pour half the rum in  each glass, followed by half the cider and then top with sparkling. Add a slice of apple to the rim then, most importantly, down.


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Chickandon Cordonlon Bleu Balls

Main, Party Food, Snack, Survivor, Survivor 45, Tapas, TV, TV Recap

Previously on Survivor we welcomed 18 new castaways to the still glorious islands of Fiji. Well 17 and Bruce, given his first-minutes-of-44-concussion pulled him from that game and since Jeff Probst is a kind and merciful zaddy, he was brought back with another batch of newbies. While he denied having any sort of advantage, this season’s queen Emily called out him on it, pointing that while he didn’t get to play, going through the preparation and knowing players surely set him in good stead. Meanwhile Zaddy Austin found the beware advantage at Reba, which yes, is a tribe name. At tribal council Emily moved on to calling out Kaleb and Sabiyah for being a tight duo in an effort to save herself. That proved unnecessary, however, as Hannah, who was going through it with nicotine withdrawal opted to up and quit instead, allowing our icon to live another day.

Back at camp the tribe reflected on Hannah opting to bounce, with Sean kinda getting it, given they straight up have nothing and are miserable. Emily meanwhile was turning over a new leaf, apologising to Sabiyah and Kaleb for calling out their alliance. She explained she didn’t mean to come from an angry place, while Sabiyah calmly explained that while it wasn’t her intent, it did upset her and as such, Emily’s abruptness led to her isolation. Emily, to her credit, tried to figure out a way to apologise, however Sabiyah wasn’t vibing and instead took herself to the shore for some alone time to breathe.

AND THEN THE THEME SONG FINALLY RETURNED.

After the glorious opening theme finished, we checked in with Reba the next morning where Sifu was rocking some tai chi and living his best life. Which is kinda the polar opposite of how Lulu was feeling. He then jumped around being wild, cutting and punching trees and well, if there is a medevac this season, let’s pencil it in for Sifu. J Maya meanwhile was busy trying to crack the code on the tribe flag and while she openly tried to figure it out, Austin bided his time for everyone to leave so he could whip out his advantage. Which told him to look for an X on a fallen palm tree.

Things were just as good over at Belo as they made fire and lived their best lives. Bruce in particular, who was making a tonne of noise and exuding energy. Sadly for him, only Jake was loving his fun uncle act while the rest of the tribe were growing annoyed by it. And would probably prefer he just admit to being the leader he wants to be. 

We went back to Lulu where Emily was focused on hunting for an idol or clue, desperate to find some form of protection, given she had burnt all the bridges. That spurred the rest of the tribe into action, searching high and low to find the idol instead of her. Sabiyah caught up with Emily to let her know everyone was hunting if they wanted to do it together, which Emily called bullshit on, admitting she knows it just means they don’t want her to find it. As everyone hunted, Brandon was ultimately the one that found the Beware Advantage and immediately passed it over to Sabiyah to open. Methodically, she worked through the clues which directed her to the top of a tree. Sadly, though, the idol was at the very tippity top of said tree, so it remained hidden.

Back at Reba we learnt that Dee has an especially long big toe and for some reason it is now a killer plot point. Julie and Dee caught up by the beach and formed a tight bond. Though being the oldest on the tribe, Julie leant into her mama role and tried to parent her way into an alliance with her. Which she quickly did, with Drew and Austin in tow. Oh and Drew is still convinced he is going to be a dominant power player and ugh, it is funny. Because no.

Over at Lulu, Emily was making in-roads with Kaleb who encouraged her to spend less time focusing on strategy as it is making everyone nervous. He calmly explained to us that he knows it is important to always be open to people in the game, even if you’re not working together, and just like that, she got a second wind. She once again apologised to Sabiyah who returned serve and admitted they were both in the wrong, followed by praising Brandon for his lush hair and assuring Sean she would temper her anxiety. She then had a powerful confessional about how she is learning to overcome her core anxieties and fears and ugh, I love a redemption arc.

The tribes received a note inviting someone to jump on a boat to Journey Island with Drew, Brandon and Bruce heading off, much to Katurah’s absolute irritation. The trio caught everyone up on where things stood at each tribe. Well, now Bruce as he was cagey, while Brandon overshared and Drew wisely offered up minimal information but enough to look like he was deliberately being cagey. The boys split up to find their shot at an advantage, the key being they had to solve a puzzle in three minutes. If they win, they jag the advantage but if they lost, they can’t vote at the next tribal council. Bruce immediately opted out, Brandon was all in while Drew smartly thought through all the risks and TBH, maybe I’ve been too tough on him. Sadly for Brandon he failed, while Drew snatched the advantage and well, I guess I’m now a fan.

Oh and Drew’s advantage is Safety Without Player, which only lasts until Final Ten.

Brandon returned to camp and filled them in on how badly he did during the challenge, with Sean wondering if Brandon has anything to offer the tribe at all, given he hasn’t exactly performed yet. Meanwhile Reba hid from Drew to surprise him before he too opted to give out the full truth and again, I think that is a wise move given it doesn’t really last long. More importantly, it won over Austin who pulled him aside to let him know about his Beware Advantage and I live for this modern JT and Stephen. Meanwhile over at Belo, Brando and the girls rocked their buffs as tops and I love that for him and look forward to him making it to the end with the girls. Sadly Jake and Bruce were aware of the growing alliance and immediately planned to form a counter. Bruce then went person to person trying to get intel. And somehow Brando and Kellie are now the swing votes.

We finally caught a glimpse of Jeffrey as the tribes lined up for the latest immunity challenge where they would climb up a tower and jump off to collect a key, swim to and walk across a balance beam, release puzzle pieces and solve said puzzle. Which has been updated, due to Carson. Oh and the first place tribe would also get a massive fishing kit while second would earn a few bits of gear while the losers get nothing. And the sit out rule has changed and no one can sit out back to back challenges at all, meaning Claire is also living rent free in Jeff’s mind. Emily got Lulu out to an early lead at the balance beam before everyone caught up on the swim. Reba started to pull ahead with Lulu nipping at their heels before Kendra smashed her koochie on the balance beam and fuck, that looked painful. Everyone, obviously, caught up at the puzzle as Brando and Kellie powered through and closed the gap for Belo as Reba jagged immunity just ahead of them, sending Lulu back to tribal council. Thanks to Brandon bombing yet another challenge.

Back at camp Brandon quickly apologised to the tribe for costing them immunity, though assured them he wants to stay. Emily pointed out that it is clearly between them tonight and as such, it is up to the other three to figure it out and left them to come up with a decision. As they tried to jag the idol so Sabiyah could hold on to her vote. Which they finally finally got. Except it is tragically encased in wax, meaning she can’t melt it free and now she needs to win a challenge and get flint before she can get it.

Sabiyah filled Brandon in on what was going on, who praised himself as a social icon and as such, wasn’t too concerned to be heading to tribal with only three votes. Emily meanwhile handed over her Shot in the Dark to Sabiyah to try and form a bond with her and build trust, knowing Emily won’t being trying anything which could risk her. Sadly Sabiyah still wanted to cut her throat before Emily got a chance to turn on her, while the boys tried to remind her that given they will never win with Brandon on the tribe, it makes sense to get rid of him and at least give them a shot.

At tribal council Sabiyah spoke about the feeling of blue balls after Hannah opted out of the game. Brandon admitted he knew it was between him and Emily last time, and that it is still the case tonight. Sean spoke about the fact the duo let them go off to the side to figure things out before Brandon opened up about how he has never been part of a team, though knows he bombed. Talk turned to Emily turning around and making an effort to work better with the tribe. Brandon spoke about the fact he thinks he has just been unlucky and thinks he can be an asset in the next challenge, which Probst called bullshit on, pointing out that he should pitch himself as a waterboy instead. Emily meanwhile spoke about the trauma of watching herself on TV when she gets home, before Brandon opened up about desperately loving Survivor since childhood and how he just hopes that if it comes to an end, he was able to get what he needed out of it.

The tribe then voted and tragically for Brandon, the tribe opted to at least try to jag victory in a challenge and banded to send him home. Allowing Queen Emily to see another day. While I was thrilled by that part of the outcome, I kept my mouth shut as he arrived at Loser Lodge and pulled him in for a massive hug and assured him that his trajectory is 100% how I would do in the game. Plus, in just two episodes Brandon served all the content and as such, he is definitely memorable enough for the inevitable early boots season. Which was enough to earn him a toast in the form of some Chickandon Cordonlon Bleu Balls.

There is really nothing better than a cordon bleu – cheese, ham and crunchy chicken, werk – until you put it in ball form. More crunch, more gooiness and more mobile, making it a win for everyone.

Enjoy!

Chickandon Cordonlon Bleu Balls
Serves: 6.

Ingredients
500g chicken mince
2 cups panko breadcrumbs
kosher salt & pepper, to taste
50g mozzarella, grated
50g parmesan, grated
50g ham, diced
2 garlic cloves, minced
2 tbsp fresh parsley, roughly chopped
½ cup plain flour
1 egg, whisked
olive oil spray

Method
Preheat the oven to 200C.

Combine the mince and a cup of breadcrumbs with a good whack of salt and pepper, and scrunch until it comes together. Divide the mixture into tablespoon sized balls. Meanwhile stir together the cheeses, ham, garlic and parsley in another bowl.

Working ball by ball, make a little indent and fill with the ham and cheese mixture before folding the chicken around to enclose and form a ball.

Pop the flour in a bowl, the whisked egg in another and the breadcrumbs in the last. Coat the balls in flour, followed by the egg and finally the breadcrumbs, and pop on a lined baking sheet. Repeat the process until done.

Give the balls a spray with the olive oil and pop them in the oven to bake for 20 minutes, or until golden brown. Before serving and devouring.


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Beef & Eggplant Fattennah Rose

Main, Street Food, Survivor, Survivor 45, TV, TV Recap

Previously on Survivor the franchise was reborn thanks in no small part to – and by that, completely because of – the Tika Three. Despite Bruce concussing himself within the first 5 minutes and dooming the tribe to some early losses, Carolyn, Carson and Yam Yam powered through the season and made it all the way to the top four. And not just powered, by ran diversions, added drama and spice and well, were just delights, TBH. So much so that Survivor is back in the race for the Emmys and our current reigning – Yam Yam – is iconic.

But lions, tigers and zaddies – oh my! – that was last season, and this is now. 18 new castaways boated into frame where we learnt Drew is a genius baby, Katurah is going to keep her career as a lawyer a secret and Emily would rather go home first if she isn’t going to win, because what a waste of time. Like a boss. Or Pia Miranda, who gave a very similar winner’s quote. Jake lives with his grandmother and I love him, Sifu is a zen dude bro straight from Ken’s mojo dojo casa house, Sean is a sweet zaddy who I will stan, Kellie is ready to cut throats and Dee is leaving nothing in the tank.

The speed boats docked at a cute little barge where the new gang met up with Probst, while we met Austin who is BAE. Punkie Johnson lookalike Sabiyah meanwhile is already an icon, while Brandon sobbed, overjoyed to just be here. While Libra Kendra is just living for the vibes, so I live for her. After Probst welcomed them to the new season, he reminded them that while he will try over and over to derail the game with twists, it is still a social game at its core. Brandon won hearts as he continued to sob over Jeff being in his presence and ugh, I love his energy. Kinda. Bruce meanwhile was at an 11, which is tragically exactly what cost him his place in the game the first time. But you know, props to him for pointing out he has zero advantage given he barely lasted an hour. Emily meanwhile called bullshit and reminded him that he had the time to mentally prepare and that is an advantage in itself. And when he tried to refute THAT, she pointed out he was talking with authority and yeah, she is feisty and I love it.

We then got the tribe names, Reba – because she’s a Survivor – Lulu and Belo, before Probst threw them into a marooning challenge, where two members from each tribe empty a crate of sandbags and collect a key before two more dive off the boat and swim to a dinghy to get a second while the third duo would have to use the keys to unlock poles to release their flint. Which the victor gets to keep, along with a pot and machete. Austin and Sifu got Reba out to an early lead with Kaleb and Sabiyah nipping at their heels for Lulu while Katurah and Bruce were running last for Belo, though thankfully both were well. Sean and Brandon whipped through the second part and put Lulu out in front, until Brandon choked on the ladder allowing Kellie and Jake to put Belo out in front. Somehow they all caught up at releasing their flint with Reba just nabbing victory.

Please use this time to go listen to the supercut of the theme song above.

Lulu and Belo then had to pick a new duo to work for their supplies with Kaleb and Sabiyah and Brando and Jake whisked off to another island to complete the sweat vs. savvy challenge. While Reba calmly paddled to their camp and celebrated having an advantage over their rivals. They took some time to introduce themselves, with everyone gagged J. is a singer songwriter, while Julie is a single mum who will be hiding the fact she is an attorney too. Drew meanwhile talks about himself in the third person and thinks he is the broiest nerd to ever exist and yeah, I don’t know if it is going to be as winning as he thinks.

Bruce and his angels arrived at Belo, thrilled for the lovely beach while he wanted them to know he is not Dad, he doesn’t want to lead and he just wants to have fun. Our Libran queen Kendra wanted to weave some palm fronds which Bruce cautioned was a waste of time, before he continued to list a bunch of things he learnt from his first time on the island and generally took the lead. While this annoyed the dolls, they loved that they were all vibing and let the astrology queens run the game and take out the win.

Over at Lulu, Emily immediately asked Hannah and Sean if they thought it was suss that Kaleb and Sabiyah volunteered to participate in the secondary challenge. Before they locked them in as targets, the group wandered around trying to figure out what to do before Brandon returned and spoke about how anxious he is and having a sit down. Oh and Hannah swept, while poor Sean just wanted someone to get to work with him until the others got back with supplies. Hopefully.

Speaking of supplies, Kaleb, Sabiyah, Jake and Brando arrived at the challenge where they learnt they would be facing off for supplies rather than both potentially winning. They would have an hour to move 40 logs from one end of the beach to the other before releasing a flint from a puzzle, with only one winning. If they finish in time, that is. Which they didn’t, painting an epic target on all of their shoulders given nobody has ever failed the challenges in the modern era. And now two tribes have nothing.

Belo were the first to learn they were screwed as Jake and Brando arrived and tried to keep the mood up, assuring their tribe that Lulu is also screwed, so it is all good. As Sabiyah and Kaleb arrived to warn the crew that they got nothing, Emily was immediately pissed and got to work warning her tribemates that they clearly took an advantage. Hannah and Brandon meanwhile were breaking down in tears talking about how stressful the game is, starved and tired, already. After a couple of hours. Though, hey, maybe it is Hannah’s nicotine withdrawal. Back at Belo, the ladies were busy locking in a final three which I love. Though the fact that Kendra wants to target Jake for being a lawyer, I am worried it will be their undoing, since Katurah is also one. Though given she is expertly pretending to be an office manager, maybe the gals can ride to the end.

The next day Lulu was being carried by Punkie Johnson who was busy leading them in building a shelter. Despite Emily’s bad attitude. As everyone grew annoyed by her glass half-empty vibe, they locked in an alliance against her. Though given they all thought the pyramids were alien batteries, I’m not sure she would really care to leave the rest of them chatting conspiracies and heading home.

Over at Reba Sifu was collecting wood slash hunting for idols. Which his tribe realised he was doing, so in turn, went hunting for him. While he was hiding behind shrubs saying he was planning to play like Tony. Though wasn’t very stealth as his rustling got him caught in a matter of minutes. So bye Sifu, Dee and the dolls hate you. Austin meanwhile was serving zaddy in his boxers and calmly snatched the Beware Advantage in a tree. He learnt that to claim an idol, he would need to decipher a coded message on the tribe flag to learn the next step. Oh and until he gets the idol, he can’t vote at tribal council.

The tribes came together with Jeffrey for the first immunity challenge of the season where they would race up and over a ramp into a mud pit, drag a bag of coconuts, shoot them in a sack to release keys and then climb a tower, release puzzle pieces and solve it. With the first two to finish claiming immunity and the losing the tribe heading to tribal council and losing their flint. Or just not getting one, if Lulu or Belo keep their losing ways going. Belo got out to the earliest of leads as they powered through the mud, followed by Reba as Lulu took up the rear. Which was how things stayed the entire challenge, obstacle after obstacle, until Reba made it to the puzzle first. Belo managed to make quick work of the puzzle and jag immunity as Lulu remained completely out of things, leaving Reba to snatch the second and put Lulu out of their misery.

Back at camp the tribe went into the ocean to wash off the mud as Hannah admitted to feeling relief over the fact they could actually vote her out and send her home. She told Brandon she was ready to go, though was worried about how she could convince people to flip the vote from Emily to her. Brandon meanwhile tried to convince her to stay as he couldn’t do it without her. Brandon started to break down, crying to Kaleb and Sabiyah about being in so much pain with reflux, while Sabiyah calmly told him he was having a panic attack. Emily caught up with Hannah and Brandon to float the idea of getting rid of Kaleb to break up the strong duo of Kaleb and Sabiyah, so she could hopefully work with her. Sadly for Emily though, Brandon immediately told Kaleb. Who, sadly for Brandon, immediately approached Sean and Hannah to get rid of Brandon for bombing any and all challenges.

At the glam AF tribal council, the tribe lit their torches and got to kiki-ing with Probst as Sean admitted that coming into the game he is questioning everything about himself and who he is. Emily meanwhile felt her personality is just amplified in the game, rather than necessarily being different. Hannah meanwhile opened up about being emotionally wrecked and not sure if she even wants to be here. Sabiyah pointed out that if she wants to go, that is great, though maybe she should wait for a couple of rounds to see if things get better. Emily meanwhile called out Sabiyah and Kaleb for forming a tight alliance, and pointed out that given they are strong, they can dictate what happens.

Talk turned to Brandon bombing all the things with him reiterating he would love to stay and comfort people while Emily desperately wants to work through things and survive. Hannah, who I just realised looks like Jamie Lynn Spears, then pointed out that she would love to see how it could all play out. From the comfort of the couch. And as such, she would happily just quit, rather than having a formal vote. Probst then asked if the tribe would be willing to do a mercy kill, with them all agreeing through tears before Probst up and snuffed her torch, granting her wish. Without even cussing her out like he would in the good old days, like Osten.

As she arrived back at Loser Lodge, she ran into my arms and started jumping up and down, grateful, not just for being back in civilisation but because she now gave us an iconic, memorable first boot. I mean, sure, a cancelled tribal council leaves us with Survivor blue balls, it did protect our newest Queen and future winner, Emily and as such, I will let it slide. So I simply thanked Hannah for her service over a piping hot Beef & Eggplant Fattennah Rose.

This tweaked little Nigella number is perfect for a lady that loves all the glorious comfort of a warm home. Earthy and warming, it is the perfect, rich dish to help work you through any and all problems.

Enjoy!

Beef & Eggplant Fattennah Rose
Serves: 4.

Ingredients
4 Pita Andre Bread, cut into triangles
¼ cup olive oil
1 onion, diced
1 eggplant, diced 2 tsp cumin
2 tsp cumin
2 tsp ground coriander
1 tsp paprika
2 tsp sea salt flakes
500g beef mince
500g Greek yoghurt
75ml tahini
45ml lemon juice
2 garlic cloves, minced
100g pomegranate seeds
2 tbsp mint leaves, roughly chopped

Method
Preheat the oven to 180°C. Toast the pita triangles with 1 tablespoon of olive oil, pop on a lined baking sheet and bake for 10–15 minutes, or until they are crisp. Remove and allow to cool.

Heat the rest of the oil in a large skillet over low heat and cook the onion for five minutes, or until soft and sweet. Crank up to medium and stir through the eggplant, and cook for 10 minutes. Stir in the cumin, coriander, paprike and half the salt with the mince, breaking up the beef with a wooden spoon as you go. Cook for ten minutes or until the beef is cooked through. Remove from heat

Combine the yoghurt, tahini, lemon juice, garlic and a teaspoon of salt in a heatproof bowl. Pop over a double boiler and beat until it is light and thickened.

To assemble, divide the pita chips between plates, top with the beef, followed by the yoghurt and top with a sprinkle of pomegranate and mint. Then devouring.


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Eh eh, oy, lyoll lee lyoll lee, lyah ah

Guess Who's Coming to Dinner, Survivor, Survivor 45, TV, TV Recap

Breaking(ish) news: my love, Jeffrey Probst, has announced the official return of the theme song for Survivor 45 and well, I am excited.

Nature is healing, my soul is warmed and finally, finally, all is right in the world. Well, aside from the return to a 39 day season, but I digress.

While the 17 newbies and Bruce are still only spending 26 days living on the shores of the Mamanuca Islands, Jeffrey still requested the pleasure of my company to provide them with culinary comfort. And since I would do, pretty much whatever Jeff wants, I was on the next plane.

Well, that, and the fact Yam Yam, Carolyn and Carson reinvigorated the franchise and finally got it back into Emmys contention.

Will the newbies live up to the greatness of Team Tika? I hope. And even if they don’t, check back next week as we wrap up the first episode and catch-up with the 44th member of the Sonja Christopher First Boot club.

Who do you think it will be?

📷: CBS.


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Candied Yam Yams Arocho

Side, Snack, Survivor, Survivor 44, Sweets, TV, TV Recap, Vegetarian

Previously on Survivor 18 new castaways were marooned on the islands of Fiji and immediately decided they wanted to emulate Kaôh Rōng and find out just how much can go wrong in a single season. Breaking records, poor Bruce hit his head in the marooning challenge and while he made it back to camp, he was promptly medevaced that night. Matthew then fell off a rock and dislocated his shoulder the next day before Brandon got heat exhaustion in the first immunity challenge, the latter sending Ratu to the first tribal council. And while Brandon was the obvious target, he had found the hidden immunity idol and as such, sent Maddy out the door as the first (official) boot with his single vote.

We then experienced yet another dark timeline where a string of young, iconic women went back-to-back-to-back, with Helen, Claire and Sarah rounding out an iconic pre-merge. Matthew’s lingering shoulder pain saw him quit-evaced before the tribes faked merge. This saw the demise of Josh, who had been the main target of multiple tribes for about 4 episodes.

We then saw nature heal, albeit in a heartbreaking fashion, as sweet Matt became the King of the Jury, partly due to his love Frannie winning immunity. Brandon and Kane soon followed before Frannie was felled for being too much of a threat. We then lost zaddy Danny before Jamie just missed her spot in the finale. After Lauren lost final five immunity, she was booted for her underdog story. Heidi then took out her first win of the season at the final immunity challenge however wanting a hero moment for her resume, sent Yam Yam and Carolyn through to final tribal council and faced off against young Carson for the final slot. And beat him in record breaking time to book her slot.

Despite playing a strong game and being beloved by literally everyone, Carolyn didn’t muster a vote at final tribal council – rude – while Heidi jagged one from her ally Danny, leaving Yam Yam to be crowned our King. And while I was disappointed for Carolyn, Yam Yam equally has my heart and played such a smart disarming game that he easily booked himself a spot as one of the top tier. Plus, he is fun, entertaining, silly and represents the sassy, curvy, queer men, so for that, I booked my stan card pre-season.

Most importantly, however, is the fact that for the first time since San Juan Del Sur, I picked the winner pre-season and for that alone, he is worthy of a piping hot dish of Candied Yam Yams Arocho.

While the concept of this dish always filled me with equal parts disgust and intrigue, however after trying it, I instantly fell in love. Earthy and sweet, this dish has everything. Kinda like our new King.

Enjoy!

Candied Yam Yams Arocho
Serves: 8-12.

Ingredients
2kg sweet potatoes, peeled and cut into 3(ish)mm coins
½ cup pecans, roughly chopped
½ cup muscovado sugar
80g unsalted butter
1 tsp cinnamon
¼ tsp cayenne pepper
a pinch of nutmeg
a pinch of ground ginger
kosher salt and pepper, to taste
1 tsp vanilla extract
4 cups mini marshmallows, more or less as needed

Method
Preheat the oven to 180C.

Butter a large baking dish – 2.5-3L – and layer the discs of sweet potato, followed by some pecans after every layer or two, then some more sweet potato and continue the process until it is all gone.

Combine the sugar, butter, cinnamon, cayenne, nutmeg and ginger in a saucepan with a good whack of salt and pepper. Place over medium heat and cook, stirring, until it starts to boil. Once it has come together, remove from the heat and stir through the vanilla. Pour over the potato and pecan, cover with foil and pop in the oven to bake for 45 minutes. Remove the foil and continue to cook uncovered for about 20 minutes, or until the potato is tender.

Remove from the oven and scatter over the marshmallows and return to the oven to cook for 15 minutes, or until the top is golden and melted. Leave to rest for about 5 minutes before slicing and serving, perhaps with a Turkey Wellington.


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