So previously on Survivor was the first half of a double episode, so maybe go read about the lead-up to Chris’ boot there, ok? I mean, Probst didn’t tell me what to focus on and you just know my mind is stuck on Ken’s ant covered torso.
Back at camp, Sunday continued to be an upbeat non-entity and Jay was shocked to have survived, despite the fact he had an idol and if he were truly worried, should have played the idol.
Bret then got to work winning over the majority alliance and approached Zeke after tribal, and then took Sunday to help him chat with David the following morning. The latter of whom decided Zeke needed to go.
Obviously Bret then went to Zeke to discuss getting rid of David. David then told us how much of a threat Zeke is, Zeke then countered by saying David was a threat. Breaking up the confessional back and forth, Zeke took his fellow nerd crew out for a chat to discuss how the battle lines were falling.
Feeling my confession, Probst then manifested for arguably the most hilarious reward challenge of all time, were they were broken up into three teams and then forced to flop along a course like snakes. I think there was a puzzle at the end but all I could focus on was Ken writhing around in the sand. If only he got his white buns out to glitzen in the sun like Will and Bret.
I don’t want to say it would have won him the challenge, but Bret’s butt surely contributed to his, Zeke and Sunday’s come from behind win.
And you know what a challenge win means for Bret … the party boy comes out! Although out of character, he didn’t get completely wild and instead had a completely heart warming conversation with Zeke about his sexuality.
Seriously, you thought all the feels were in the first hour.
Sadly Sunday literally returned to the table and our beautiful discussion about sexuality turned to the next vote which, surprise, surprise, Zeke was hoping would see David exiting the game.
When they arrived back at camp, Hannah ran to David – sick of Zeke’s growing kingpin attitude – and told him what Zeke was plotting, scaring the shit out of David.
Thankfully Probst was just as sick of the David-Zeke back and forth and reappeared for the immunity challenge which sadly had zero innuendo. I mean, they had to navigate a rod through a hole … but at best you could make a glory hole joke.
Probst deserves better, to be honest.
Thankfully Jay dominated both aspects of the puzzle – oh, there was a slide puzzle finish – and claimed immunity before anyone else even finished the first part.
Back at camp the tribe quickly got to work deciding on where they fell in the David-Zeke war … until Zeke got spooked by Hannah’s non-committal attitude during their watercooler discussion and flipped his side’s vote to Hannah.
Sadly – or amazingly – it was only the beginning of the bedlam as we arrived at one of the most confusing and chaotic tribal councils of all time.
And that is ignoring the bug that attacked and fell in love with Taylor on the jury bench.
Probst kicked off by asking if anyone was confident about tonight, which no one was. Hannah then started to whisper to Jay, David alluded to trust clusters, the previously delightful Bret then got mad and started to berate David for his anxiety. Zeke joined the bullying, before Hannah and Sunday stepped in to stop them.
With that over, Hannah started whispering to Adam again, Sunday threw out Ken’s name, Adam whispered to David and everyone was completely confused as they went to cast their votes.
Not content with just one selfless idol play, David played his idol on Ken – following Sunday’s lowkey killer move of throwing out his name when he was never the target – before we saw the votes come in tied for Zeke and Hannah.
With Adam’s boneheaded move to change David’s idol play from Hannah, to Zeke, we went for a second round of voting with Hannah and Zeke taking the opportunity to campaign to Jessica to avoid rocks while everyone was voting.
Sadly it was another tie and they couldn’t come to a unanimous decision leading to Will, Bret, Sunday, David, Jessica and Adam going to rocks, where Jessica’s fear of rocks was proven to be founded, as she found her way out of the game.
Breaking everyone’s heart in the process.
Although the silver lining is that Ken is now the proud owner and my dear friend Jess – we met after she convinced the Albany D.A. to drop charges against me, I think for racketeering, due to my (alleged) clear and apparent psychological issues – was comforted by a huge batch of my Jessicurry Lewis Puffs.
Hot and spicy, a little bit sweet and completely comforting and warm, these curry puffs are the perfect way to dull your rock-draw pain. Or fill up if someone has eaten all your Thanksgiving leftovers.
Or to snack on while watching Gilmore Girls: A Year in the Life.
Jessicurry Lewis Puffs
1 tbsp olive oil
1 onion, diced
5 garlic cloves, crushed
500g chicken mince
½ cup madras curry paste
1 large washed potato, cut into a small dice
1 carrot, cut into a small dice
1 cup frozen peas
small handful coriander leaves, finely chopped
3 tbsp lemon juice
6 sheets frozen puff pastry, thawed
1 egg, lightly beaten
natural yoghurt or raita, to serve
Heat a lug of oil in a large frying pan and sweat the onion and garlic, until softened. Add the mince and cook, breaking up with a wooden spoon until browned – about five minutes. Add the curry paste and cook for a couple of minutes. Add the potato, carrot, peas and 1 cup of water. Bring to the boil, reduce heat and simmer for about ten minutes, or until the mixture has thickened. Remove from the heat, stir in the coriander and lemon juice, and allow to cool.
While everything is chilling, preheat the oven to 180°C.
Once adequately chilled, cut each sheet of pastry into four or nine squares – depending on how large you want the puffs. Place a mounded -tsp-tbsp, depending on the size of the pastry – heap of the mince mixture. Brush the edge of pastry with egg, fold over the pastry to enclose, press and crimp the egg and place on a lined baking sheet. Continue the process until you run out of pastry or mixture.
(I had extra mixture so I made a curry jaffle with paneer … but you just freeze it).
Brush the top of the puffs with egg and place into the oven for 20 minutes or so, or until lightly browned and puffed.
Serve with yoghurt or raita and devour.