Chicken Breast

Tommurice Manninen

Australian Survivor, Main, Survivor: Australia V The World, TV, TV Recap

Previously on Australian Survivor the Aussies were well and truly on the bottom, with the internationals dominating immunity challenges and even venturing to the spa together. Speaking of which, while the latter trip was taking place, the trio broke the locked box and realised the internationals also held an idol, making them even more on the bottom. After Tommi won immunity, they appeared to be locked in to get rid of Shonee. Until he, Lisa and Kass floated getting rid of Parv instead. Whether the plan was ever true or not, it led to absolute chaos at tribal council as Luke left everything on the table as he outed all the secrets. After 1000s of chats, they eventually voted with Parvati pretending she could steal Kass’s idol after the vote, though let her play it when she was told she was playing it for Lisa. Allowing Parvati and Cirie’s switch to the Aussies to land, with Kass shown the door instead.

After Kass departed, JLP gagged the tribe by telling them that the pace of the game was not letting up, as tonight, they would be voting out another person from the game. And he had a little immunity challenge set up next to tribal council.

As such the tribe pivoted to the challenge where they would hold onto a rope to steady a wobbly table while racing to balance five balls on top. Shonee was quick to get her eye in, until JLP praised her and she lost balance. The same thing happened to Parvati, before Luke seemingly got his eye in and wasn’t distracted by JLP, as he got to work on his second ball. Tommi then started to nip at his heels, before he dropped. As everyone else continued to struggle, Luke stacked his third and fourth balls, while they all grew more and more frustrated. As JLP reminded them to not give up, as Luke could still drop. All while making plenty of ball puns, of course, because JLP is the best of us. After placing his fifth ball, Luke anxiously stepped back a centimetre at a time until he made it to his table and guaranteed his place in the final six.

Back at tribal council the rain started to pour down as Kass wandered back into tribal council to join the jury. Parvati mentioned that Luke winning immunity didn’t bother her, given that Tommi was clearly leading the blindside against her and as such, she would be voting for him. This fired up Tommi, who pleaded with the Aussies to return the favours he has been doing and get rid of one of Parvati and Cirie. The Aussies stood up to chat and agreed that voting for Tommi is the simplest, safest solution and as such, they needed to stick with him. After sitting down, Luke whispered to Janine that Lisa clearly wanted his head though, so maybe they should take her out instead. Before Tommi stood up and begged Luke to vote for Cirie.

Parvati mentioned that she drew a line in the sand back at camp before tribal council and as such, she was sticking with it for this vote too. Because it didn’t feel like Tommi was just betraying her, but locking in a blindside against her. Which seems like it is the same thing, but Parv is Parv, and I am not worthy enough to question her, TBH. This led to him begging Parvati to work with him. JLP then asked if anyone wanted to say anything, leading to Lisa putting up her hand and telling Jonathan that she regretted not sticking by her people in her winning season and as such, she wanted to do that tonight and would like to quit. Which honestly infuriated JLP, who couldn’t understand why she would want to do that with only five days remaining. Lisa explained that her main goal is for an international to win the season and that she honestly doesn’t think she has the best chance, Tommi does, and she would like to guarantee him one more shot.

Jonathan then pointed out that if she quits, she isn’t on the jury and they would still vote tonight, meaning Tommi could still go home. Which quickly made her change her tune. Tommi then whispered for him to vote for Cirie before the tribe voted. And despite Tommi’s best attempts, the Aussie/US coalition stuck together to send our sweet Fin Tommi from the game.

Given he was going by the name Tom(mi) of Finland, as soon as he arrived at the Jury Villa, I pulled him in for a massive hug, thanking him for playing such a solid game. And most importantly, for being an absolute babe. Despite not being shown much of the icon in the edit, it all makes sense, given he exited at the tail end of a chaotic double boot episode and they couldn’t break our hearts if we loved him more. What was clear from the season, however, is that he was clearly beloved by his tribemates, and like Kass before him, he won himself a fan and I desperately hope to see him again. And until then, we’ll always have Tommurice Manninen.

There are so many things that are magical about Japan – honestly, can someone fund my early retirement, so I can move there? – but the spectacle of omurice is among the greatest foods. Well, foods that aren’t sold in a konbini. Soft, jiggly eggs, spicy fried rice and a rich sauce – it is probably not the fanciest food, but it is definitely among the tastiest.

Enjoy!

Tommurice Manninen
Serves: 2.

Ingredients
1 tbsp unsalted butter
½ an onion, finely diced
1 chicken breast, thinly sliced
kosher salt and pepper, to taste
6 tbsp ketchup
1 tbsp Worcestershire sauce
2 tbsp soy sauce
1 tbsp mirin
2 cups cooked Japanese short-grain rice
⅓ cup peas
3 ½ tbsp vegetable oil
1 tbsp plain flour
1 tbsp tonkatsu sauce
1 tbsp honey
¾ cup water
6 tbsp milk
6 large eggs
2 tbsp double cream

Method
Pop the unsalted butter in a large frying pan over medium heat and sweat the onion for a few minutes, or until soft and sweet. Add the chicken, along with a good whack of salt and pepper, and cook for five minutes, or until cooked through. Stir in one tablespoon of the ketchup, Worcestershire, soy and mirin, and bring to a simmer. Reduce heat to low, stir in the rice and peas, and cook until heated through and the rice is perfectly coloured. Cover and leave to rest.

Meanwhile, combine the remaining ketchup and soy with the tonkatsu sauce, honey, water and two tablespoons of milk in a bowl. Heat one and a half tablespoons of vegetable oil in a saucepan over medium heat and once warm, whisk in the flour, and cook until a nice, brown roux forms. About five minutes. Reduce heat to low and slowly whisk in the jug and cook for a further five minutes or so, or until rich and thick. Set aside.

Whisk the eggs with the remaining milk, cream and a good whack of salt and pepper. Add the remaining oil to a clean frying pan over medium heat. Once shimmering, add the egg mixture and vigorously stir and scramble with chopsticks for about a minute, or until half cooked. Give the pan a shake to even out the curds, before allowing the base to set for 15 seconds or so, before immediately using the chopsticks to gently roll the eggs on top of themselves to form a thick parcel. Cook seam side down for 30 seconds, before removing from the heat.

To serve, portion the rice in the middle of a plate, top with the soft omelette and then drizzle generously with the sauce. Before devouring with your newest bestie.


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Schnitzzarah Tilleke

Australian Survivor, Australian Survivor (2017), Main, Pizza, Poultry, Survivor: Australia V The World, TV, TV Recap

Previously on Australian Survivor seven of the best Aussies were thrown into battle against seven of the best from around the globe, with us seeing big names go out back to back to back in the form of Rob, David and George. JLP then decided to spice up the Mother convention by switching things up with individual immunity for each tribe, as both tribes would attend the next tribal council. With Shonee months out from giving birth, she couldn’t jag victory in one of her signature challenges, leaving Sarah to take out victory for the Aussies. While all the internationals were still fighting until Parvati narrowly snagged victory for the World over Kass. Back at camp, Shonee found herself the Aussie target while the World tribe were torn between Tony and Tommi. At tribal council, Jonathan explained that one tribe would only be at tribal council temporarily, as a fire making challenge would decide which stays. Repeating history, poor Cirie was defeated, this time by Sarah, leading to an explosive World tribal council where Tony and Parv went to town, before the Black Widow felled the two-time champ.

And jagged the hidden immunity idol as everyone exited, even getting JLP to mind her torch while she looked.

Back at camp the new Black Widow Brigade were delighted to have survived tribal council, particularly one that was as wild and chaotic as Tony with his back against the wall. Parvati in particular was thrilled to have been able to jag the hidden immunity without anyone even noticing. Cirie was quick to remind them that while they were glad to see Tony go, she would still far prefer to be going into the merge with a 6-4 advantage, rather than being even with the Aussies. Though Kass didn’t really mind, given she, Tommi and Lisa had the power in their current tribe. And even though she knows she can’t trust Parvati long term, she will fight tooth and nail to stay in the numbers at the first merge vote.

Right on cue, the tribes met up with Jonathan the next day for a cheeky little auction, with a side of merge buffs because they have officially merged. Everyone dropped their old stinky buffs and popped on with their new ones, with Parvati immediately nervous about being the biggest target left with Tony gone. Shonee meanwhile was thrilled to be the first Aussie to make the merge four times in a row, even though she knew that the Aussies were intending to get rid of her last night, and as such, wants anyone to go except for Kirby.

JLP checked in with Lisa, who broke down about how excited she was to make the merge again. She didn’t really elaborate though, as the auction kicked off – sweet Tommi’s first! The first item was a scroll, with him quickly bidding all of his money. Kirby grew nervous and was going to buy in with rocks, and while she declined, Luke was in. With the King of the Jungle coming out on top of the rock draw, opening the scroll in front of the merge tribe and learning that he just bought himself the power to send someone straight back to camp, promptly booting Parv and putting a massive target on his back. With her promising that it will definitely come back to bite him. She then counted down from 5 to allow him the chance to change his mind, however he didn’t, and just like that, an enemy was made.

With the iconic Black Widow alone at camp to simmer in her rage, JLP pulled out a rack of ribs and a beer which went to Shonee for $480. A heavy covered item went to Kirby for $500 after a bidding war with Sarah, which was revealed to be a big glass jar of popcorn. Similar to Ray’s famed one from Kirby’s OG season, which resulted in a massive advantage for the owner. Though seemingly had nothing this time. A club sandwich and a coke almost went to Shonee for $20, before Lisa jumped in and won it for $40. Another heavy, covered item went to Sarah which was a massive chocolate cake which she could not share. Oh and then it was over, just like that.

We followed Parvati back to camp where she was continuing to rage about Luke coming for her, feeling like he targeted her for being the biggest threat. Things quickly got better, however, when she found a massive jar of cookies, giving her the option to share them with the tribe or keep them to herself. With her grateful to keep them a secret. Well, until she tried to bury them and shattered the jar in the process. Though that did prove to be helpful, given an advantage was hidden amongst them, granting her the power to snatch someone’s idol at tribal council.

The tribe joined her just as she had finished disposing of all the evidence, allowing plenty of time for everyone to get to know each other. Tommi shared that he was hoping to get a win for Finland, while Luke wasn’t too concerned about making an enemy of Parv as the Aussies will stick together and have his back. Right on cue, we checked in with Kirby who was busy making friends with all of the World players. Luke then praised Cirie, while Parvati told Shonee she loves following her on Instagram, and honestly, this still feels like an absolute fever dream. Kirby finally caught up to Parvati, promising her that she is still keen to work with her, with the Black Widow pretending she is on the outs of her tribe and only survived because she was immune. Kirby assured her that unlike Luke, she isn’t scared of her, and wants to play with the best and as such, she wants to work with her and Cirie. With both of the US girls promising they were equally keen to work with her. Cirie threw out that she would love to work with Shonee, before Kirby said that is great, but she doesn’t think they can work with Sarah anymore as she is clearly threatened by the big players.

Kirby pulled Shonee aside to see how she was feeling about Sarah, with them agreeing that she clearly has no interest in working with them, and as such they were both keen to jump ship to Cirie and Parvati. Though Shonee cautioned that they need to make sure Sarah doesn’t get to them first. As such, we pivoted to Sarah telling Parvati that Kirby can’t be trusted and she doesn’t like threats and as such, they need to get rid of her ASAP. Parv and Cirie compared notes, realising that one of them was lying to them and while Parv wanted to work with Kirby – who she thinks is a Black Mamba – she got the vibe that Sarah’s story had more truth. Or at the very least, she was a mutual friend of David’s and mentioning him may have played into some biases. But I digress.

The newly formed Moorditj tribe met up with JLP for the first (true) individual immunity of the season – the iconic Last Gasp. Aka the one where they would each hold onto a grate in the middle of the ocean as the tide rises, with the last person left underwater winning. As the tide rose, the rain started to pour down, costing Lisa her place after just 10 minutes. She was quickly followed by Cirie, before Kirby and Parvati pulled the plug after 15 minutes, with Shonee not long after that. After 30 minutes the rain started to pelt down as a wild lightning storm raged around them. This cost Sarah her place, while the sitouts huddled under JLP’s platform and willed the challenge to just end. Which it did at 40 minutes, as the storm became too wild and production had to step in and send everyone back to shore as the lightning had started inching towards them in the water. 

After the storm cleared, JLP announced that because they couldn’t finish the challenge, the four that were still in the game had two options. Agree to draw rocks for the necklace and one of them gets it, otherwise nobody is immune at the merge tribal council. And given it isn’t really a choice, they all drew rocks resulting in Tommi winning immunity. Technically.

They returned to camp just as the rain kicked back in, and while Tommi was delighted to be immune, he admitted that he definitely would have preferred to win it outright. Luke made jokes asking everyone to not vote him out, pulling Janine aside to come up with a plan to stick Aussie strong and take out Kass as the safest option. With that, they pulled Sarah and Shonee aside to float the idea, with Sarah begging them to say Lisa instead to safeguard around an idol play. While telling Lisa that Parvati was the target in the hope that she’d like to take out a massive threat and split from the World tribe. Speaking of Lisa, she was struggling to strategise, given the rain didn’t give them any opportunity to talk privately. Thankfully she, Kass and Tommi were able to make a run to throw out a plan, with World wanting to stick together and target someone that most of the Aussies wouldn’t want to go to rocks, settling on Janine. Which Cirie was equally keen on.

Sarah and Shonee caught up with Parvati and Cirie, with Sarah floating getting rid of Lisa. And while they all agreed, after Cirie and Sarah disappeared, Shonee lingered back with Parvati to give the public what they want, locking in an alliance and assuring us that she doesn’t care for the Aussies and is happy to take control. With Kirby joining them and throwing out Sarah’s name instead. And while Parvati was a little confused about Kirby turning on her former ride or die, she was also happy to vote out anyone that wasn’t her. Despite it being a massive red flag to blindside an ally. Cirie returned, happy to go wherever the numbers are, particularly after Shonee assured her that she would be down.

Cirie told us that all she really cares about is protecting the World tribe, so she looped in Lisa, Kass and Tommi on the plan, with the internationals concerned about doing whatever Kirby is saying because it could just as easily be a trap. Which Cirie agreed with, though pointed out that if Kirby is telling the truth and votes for Sarah, and the World tribe stick together, they can dictate who goes either way. Kirby meanwhile caught up with Luke and admitted that Parvati and Cirie are planning to go for Sarah, and she would be tempted to join them. Which panicked Luke, assuring her that when Sarah tries to turn on her, he will know and he will protect her, so she needs to hold firm with the Aussies for now. Finally, the Aussies came back together, agreeing to vote together and that they would be willing to go to rocks should they need to.

At tribal council Luke spoke about how hard it was to lose immunity due to mother nature, while Kass was excited they were all finally together. Despite hearing way too many names back at camp, begging the question, are the Aussies full of cracks or full of liars. Sarah meanwhile was just hopeful that the people she was speaking to were telling the truth. Kirby spoke about making new friends because it is a new game, and that they all should be looking at options if they want to make it to the end. While Janine reminded everyone how important tonight is at setting up the end game. Cirie suggested that it is less about choosing who to ride with and more about weeding out the toxic relationships. While Parv spoke about how desperately nobody wants to go to rocks, and as such, everyone has been struggling with the choice, given the OG tribes were even.

Shonee spoke about how great a merge is at saving people that were seemingly on the outs and admitted that she could be popular with the new people. Kirby spoke about the vote being about building trust, while Parv was happy to go to war with a rival alliance, should there be one. Lisa started to get spooked that the Aussies would play an idol for Sarah based on the conversations, with her, Cirie and Kass debating the merits of voting Kirby or Sarah, worried about the idol which is actually in Luke’s pocket and will only be played for him. With that the tribe voted and after three votes piled up on Janine, three landed on Kass before the rest came in for Sarah, sending her from the game as the Queen of the Jury.

Despite the heartbreak of finding herself booted from the game, the Aussie’s resident superfan took it in her stride, admitting that she didn’t play her best game this season and as such, wasn’t surprised Kirby turned on her. I pulled her in for a massive hug and thanked her for finally coming back to the game given, IMO, she was a glaring omission from every single returning player season we’ve had thus far. And while she was felled early, she more than proved me right. As such, we toasted her Mother status as we smashed a big ol’ Schnitzzarah Tilleke.

While I think I cursed her on a technicality, this is so damn good – and massive, it was hard for her to hold a grudge. You could argue it is kind of a mega parmi, given it is simply a bunch of schnitzels pushed together to form a base, slathered in sauce and topped with pizza fixin’s – to quote Jeff. But whatever name you choose to use, all that matters is that it is delicious.

Enjoy!

Schnitzzarah Tilleke
Serves: 2 former models slash best friends.

Ingredients
1 cup panko breadcrumbs
1 cup flour
salt and pepper, to taste
2 eggs, whisked
2 chicken breasts, cut in half lengthways
olive oil
1 cup Amber Marinara Sauce
1 cup mozzarella cheese, grated
¼ cup pineapple pieces
3 mushrooms, sliced
½ a capsicum, sliced
½ a red onion, sliced
3 tbsp olives, sliced
shallots, to top

Method
Preheat the oven to 180C, and place the breadcrumbs in a dish, the flour in another with a good whack of salt and pepper, and the eggs in a third. Working one at a time, dip the chicken in the flour, followed by the egg and finally the breadcrumbs to full coat.

Pop the coated chicken onto a pizza tray and press together to form a circular disc, and spritz with some olive oil. Transfer to the oven and bake for 30 minutes, or until crisp and cooked through.

Once the schnitzel is cooked through, remove from the oven and smear with the marinara sauce. Sprinkle a little bit of cheese over the top, before dotting with the pineapple, mushrooms, capsicum and red onion, before giving another generous sprinkling of cheese. Transfer to the oven to bake for a further 15 minutes, or until the cheese is golden and crisp. Sprinkle with fresh shallots before devouring, like the Queen that you are.


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Lemon Chicken Orzula Rose

Australian Survivor, Australian Survivor: Brains V Brawn II, Main, Pasta, Poultry, TV, TV Recap

Previously on Australian Survivor the tribes switched things up leaving four Brains and Brawn as the minority on their new tribes. After finally clawing the majority back on OG Brains, Myles and Zara were particularly disheartened to be with Laura and Max, who weren’t exactly their closest people. Meanwhile after losing the immunity challenge the new Brawn majority were chaos; Rich wanted Logan gone, AJ was happy to join him, though not vote her out and Logan was just annoyed to be voting someone out. The OG Brawns were not much better as Ursula’s feud with Noonan created more chaos and when Ursula wouldn’t vote for anyone else, the two tribes had to join together to take out Rich instead. While Ursula fired a warning shot at Noonan, for reasons.

The next day the new Brains tribe were miserable as their terrible shelter got inundated by rain. Thankfully this introduced us to Ben, who finally arrived on screen in Episode 8 to bitch about how shitty it was, before leading the tribe to pull together an epic shelter so they can actually get some rest. As Myles chatted away with him rather than helping. He then went to Jesse to talk shit about Max playing chaotically at their final OG Brains tribal council, and just giving them all the intel. Leading to Zara pulling Myles aside to beg him to stop flapping his gums and give them some secrecy so they could find a crack in the Brawns. As the girls seemingly came together over his madness.

Over at the Brawn, Kaelan was living his best life, living in warm, dry, luxury. AJ too was loving himself sick, given he got rid of Rich and won the hearts and minds of many. The one wrinkle being that Ursula is still there, but totally miserable. He pulled Kristin aside for a chat to figure out what she was thinking, with her pledging her undying loyalty, suggesting they need to get rid of Paulie as he is the actual threat. And ugh, I want to stan her, but don’t come for my Paulie. We then got a close-up on Kaelan’s nips as Noonan tried to make conversation with Ursula who promptly shut her down as they sat in silence. Knowing she and Paulie could be in danger, Noonan pulled AJ aside to gauge how he was feeling, with him obviously suggesting they get rid of Ursula ASAP. And that the two of them and Paulie will be the best of friends once they merge.

But realistically, AJ has all the power.

JLP made his triumphant return for the next immunity challenge, where they would hold onto numbered pegs dotted along the wall, while two people from the rival tribe would toss sandbags at numbered coconuts to remove the corresponding pegs. Brains knocked out a couple in their first round, while Brawn got none. Another three pegs dropped for Brains in the next round, while Brawn got nothing. Again. Brains knocked another two in the next round before Brawn finally got the single peg Zara was standing on, and took one out from Kate. Finally, it became a showdown as AJ’s strategy to focus on the footholds knocked Zara off the wall. Karin soon followed, as did Myles and Kaelan, tying things up. It was at this point, AJ suggested the Brains should just throw the challenge, given they have the numbers advantage, while Brawn is tied up and anything could happen if they go back to tribal council. Jesse and Ursula then dropped, as did Kristin and Logan leaving Paulie as the only hope, literally hanging there like Jesus. Until he was literally hanging on by a single peg for two rounds before he finally dropped, handing Brains immunity.

Back at camp AJ was positively buzzing for the vote ahead, pulling Karin aside to see what she was thinking, with the duo feeling they needed to split the rival duo of Paulie and Noonan up with the former being the bigger threat, rather than Noonan. That being said, AJ also wanted to get rid of Ursula ASAP, as she is immovable which is even more annoying to work around. AJ explained that keeping Paulie and Noonan around will also spook the OG Brawns over at Brains into thinking they’re hostages and trick them into throwing some challenges. As AJ locked in Paulie and Noonan to vote with them to get rid of Ursula, Karin tried to woo Kaelan who put his foot down and said that Paulie is the one they need to deal with as Ursula will always upset someone, while Paulie is likeable. And since Logan was also in to take out a threat – noooooo – they just needed to convince AJ.

After Karin found a maggot in her food, we followed Paulie as he tried to convince Ursula that they can take control if she and Noonan stop coming for each other. As Ursula used the age-old excuse for targeting Noonan, being that Noonan came for her first. Noonan and Kristin joined in, with the OG Brawn agreeing to put it all to rest and convince the Brains to split their votes, so they can load their votes on Karin and boot her instead. With Ursula and Noonan apparently united, it was Noonan that flipped first, going to Karin and Logan to throw Ursula under the bus as the mastermind. And while it is suss, it could keep Paulie safe and as such, I stan. Karin, AJ and Logan caught up with Kristin and Paulie, with OG Brawn denying ever hearing about said plan. AJ obviously saw right through it, knowing the plan clearly came from Paulie. While Kristin told Ursula what Noonan did, instantly ending the truce. For good.

The OG Brains tried to make a decision who to get out as Noonan dropped by to find out what they were planning, leading to Ursula dropping by and blocking her from making any inroads. The Brains were worried that Ursula’s unpredictability was more dangerous than Paulie’s likeability, so locked in the plan and thankfully decided to keep Paulie. Just as he dropped by to check if he should be worried. AJ then went to each Brawn duo to tell them the Brains were split in their decision, so they would be able to decide who to vote for at tribal council. He then straight up clocked one of Noonan or Paulie had an idol, and told them if they did have one, he would signal for them to play it if needed.

At tribal council AJ said that the old tribes are dead to him, though his plan was to create the optics of hostages in the OG Brawn to force the new Brains tribe to throw challenges. This was a surprise to his allies, as Kaelan suggested he just wanted to win some challenges, while Karin shut it down, wanting to make friends rather than force people into being friends in a non-consensual way. Paulie meanwhile was keen to play hostage for AJ, if it saves him, while Ursula had no intention of playing hostage and doesn’t see any of the Brawn throwing a challenge. Ever. Karin meanwhile pointed out that they may have to throw challenges, though, if they want an advantage at the merge.

With that the tribe voted, Paulie held onto his idol despite a look from AJ, and everyone except Kristin came together to boot Ursula from the game. As Ursula arrived at Loser Lodge, I pulled her in for a massive hug and applaud her on navigating her feud with Noonan as long as she could. I mean, sure, both of them could have not been petty and worked together for their own goods, but you see, I’ve known Urusla for years as she went to school with my cousin. And I was the one that taught her everything I know about pettiness. As such, it was kinda my fault, so I glossed over it as we shared a comforting Lemon Chicken Orzula Rose.

Lemon, parmesan and chicken are kind of like the holy trinity of flavours. And this gloriously tart orzo paired with this crispy, classier version of a chicken shnitty just proves it.

Enjoy!

Lemon Chicken Orzula Rose
Serves: 4.

Ingredients
¾ cup flour
¾ tsp kosher salt
1 tsp freshly cracked black pepper
2 eggs
1 cup panko breadcrumbs
½ tsp garlic powder
1 cup parmesan cheese, grated
2 chicken breasts, sliced in half horizontally
olive oil
1 tbsp butter
6 spring onions, sliced
6 garlic cloves, minced
1 cup orzo
2 cups chicken stock
1 lemon, zested and juiced
¼ cup double cream

Method
Preheat the oven to 160C.

Combine the flour in a shallow bowl with half a teaspoon each of the kosher salt and black pepper. In another, whisk the 2 eggs, and another, combine the breadcrumbs, garlic powder and three quarters of a cup of the parmesan.

Dredge the chicken in the flour, then dip in the egg before coating in the cheesy breadcrumbs. Pop on a lined plate and repeat until the schnitzels are prepped. 

Heat a good lug of olive oil in a large frying pan over medium heat. Once nice and hot, add the chicken and cook for 5 minutes, before flipping and cooking for a further five minutes. Pop on a lined baking sheet and place in the oven to keep warm.

Pop a lug of olive oil and butter in a large skillet over medium heat. Once melted and foamy, add the spring onions and garlic and cook for a minute before adding the rest of the pepper. Mix in the orzo and cook for another couple of minutes, before stirring in the stock and bring to the boil. Reduce heat to low and simmer, stirring frequently, for about 15 minutes or until cooked through.

Remove from the heat and stir in the lemon zest and juice, remaining parmesan and double cream until the cheese has melted.

Serve immediately, dividing the orzo between four bowls and topping with a piece of chicken. Before devouring, greedily.


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Ricotta and Candried Tomato Roulade

Australian Survivor, Australian Survivor: Brains V Brawn II, Main, Poultry, TV, TV Recap

Previously on Australian Survivor, well four years ago, we Mad Max-ed a collection of brutes and brains into the Queensland outback due to that little thing called COVID we’d all like to forget about. Despite doing away with the tropical islands, the battle remained the same and for the first time globally, the brainiacs got the upper hand as the toughies exited one by one until Queen Hayley slayed and defeated George. Like she should have, despite being voted out mid-game. Fast forward through a snooze to crown Mark, Liz defeating returnees and Feras defeating his bestie Kirby, and JLP decided it was time to get into his Charli XCX era to remix Brains V Brawns. Though back in the Samoan jungles, home to the iconic OG winner, our Samoan Sea Witch.

Begging the question, does that mean the literal witch on the cast is winning? I hope so.

As has become tradition, we made our way into said jungle with the castaways running onto our screens through gorgeous, slow-mo shots before we first meet Olympian Morgan, who is strong, sassy and well, easily destined to be a favourite. She was joined by Noonan, an iconic female local footy player who is ready to make a name for herself and yes, queen, she is my new favourite. Next up was Rapper Zen who assured us he could have been on the Brains tribe and TBH, he is ripped, so if he is in a speedo, I would be open to stanning.

While the Brawns ran through the jungle, the Brains were smart enough to hitch a ride to their camp on a bus which makes them early favourites to win the opening challenge as they won’t be exhausted, no? Plus, Dr Karin looks ripped and iconic, and could drag me through the jungle with her pinky. Rich, meanwhile, is a director and well, is confident. But that is about it. As is financial analyst Myles who joked about being a freak in the (spread)sheets and straight up pole dances in his spare time. So yeah, we have a new favourite and well, good luck knocking this King from the throne that is my heart. Max meanwhile has veins in his brains but literally got drenched by a wave in his opening confessional which means he will flameout, no?

Finally the tribes arrived to officially meet JLP by the ocean where Noonan quickly locked in her nickname and reiterated how confident she is that the Brawns will destroy. AJ on the Brains, meanwhile, was pretty confident that a Brain would win this match up … 50% of the time, much to the dismay and confusion of the tribe. Indy meanwhile told the Brawns she thought they’d be fitter, while we met Nash who is a friend of Feras, which means he’ll be an early out by laws of Drag Race (where winner’s children go out early in future seasons).

After dishing out buffs, JLP put the tribes to the test in the first reward challenge of the season which was super simple – collect a key from a very tall pole using only sandbags and palm fronds. JLP then explained that this season they would start the season with lit fires, but they would not have a flint. The prize for winning the first challenge was a construction kit back at camp to provide shelter and one would assume, protect the flame. That or I missed it and they would get a flint too. Who knows slash who cares, TBH? The Brawns got out to an early lead with Zaddy Paulie quickly getting to the top of the heap – and my heart – but realised his pole wasn’t thick enough to do any damage. This allowed the Brains time to close the gap until AJ snapped his stick. Brawns then pivoted to standing Kate on their shoulders, while Max tried to toss a bag at the key which ended up creating a barrier to block their key from moving, allowing Brawn to power ahead and snatch victory. Because all of the Brains men just kind of gave up. Except for pole king Myles, obvi.

We followed the victors back to camp where the tribe were feeling confident now that they had witnessed the Brains lack of brains, as Paulie led the team through some introductions. With Zen using the time to drop some beats, which both shamed and delighted Noonan, making her my fave. After they unlocked their reward and split some bananas, Jesse and Ben led the rest of the tribe to whip up a shelter, everyone was quickly getting to work bonding. This frustrated Nash who thought they were wasting time and not focusing on important things like starting strong and finding said idol. And as much as I’d like to say he didn’t find one, he did and ugh, I hope he just doesn’t play it and goes out ASAP because I’m already bored.

After gloating to us about being a star, he pulled out the idol to show Zen just how good he is, quickly locking in an alliance between them in the process. We then learnt he is a sweet family man, which made me soften just a little bit and feel bad about irrationally hating him 15 minutes into the season. Until he walked back into camp wearing his idol for attention. Thankfully nobody gave a shit at all, given they were focused on building shelter. That is until Ben finally spotted it. As Paulie and the girls’ raged about how silly he was being – icons, each and every one – Nash tried to build an all male alliance, solidifying the fact I need him to bounce in week one. Preferably today, right now.

We pressed pause on Nash’s shenanigans to check in with the Brains tribe where primary school teacher Max tried to get everyone to push ahead despite him losing the challenge for the tribe. After being called stupid a couple of times, he led them through introductions before we met Queen Zara who is super smart and ready to lead an all women’s alliance. I hope and pray. Particularly if it includes good witch Laura who is iconic just because she is a witch, and potentially our prophesied winner. After reading auras she realised she couldn’t work with Kent as his colours are all off. Thankfully she and Myles were vibing, along with Logan – the second coming of Shonee – and my Queens Zara and Karin. With the girls keen to form a coven and dominate the game. So yeah, lock it up – this is the alliance I want to ride to the end with.

Back at Brawn, young Zen decided to go swimming and show off his body in a speedo, which is a win and the smartest way to my heart. Sadly he said he wanted to downplay his testosterone and intelligence, which is insufferable. Particularly coming from the youngest person on the tribe. But he continued to wander around in the speedo, so I will forgive him. With Nash firmly in a power position with his idol, everyone decided to buddy up to him in the interim, with Noonan admitting to us she didn’t want to play his game nor let him dictate how they play. So let’s home this queen can navigate around it and get rid of him ASAP.

We went back to Brains where we learnt that everyone already hated Kent, as he barked orders and tried to elevate them from their mediocrity. His words, not mine. So snooze, goodbye. Take your millions of millions of dollars, and go home. As everyone tried to sleep, he snuck out of the shelter and pulled a Sandra by throwing Max’s hat in the fire, unaware that it actually makes him Holly Hoffman, rather than the iconic two-time winner. Though without Holly’s likability to overcome the drama. He then gaslit Max, telling him his hat was deep in the jungle when he woke up. He started cackling to us, promising to slowly poison the tribe with toxicity. First setting his sights on framing our pole dancing King Myles for the hat burning, so like Nash, girl bye.

The tribes reconvened with JLP where the Brains were gagged to see my nemesis Nash walk in wearing his idol proudly. Which hopefully pushes the Brains to take out the win. Particularly after Zara suggested he can use it tonight, like the damn icon she is. Speaking of which, the tribes would race to drag a heavy coconut snake through obstacles before using them to lower a gate to access a puzzle which they would have to solve. Obviously. Despite being the weaker of the tribes – apparently – Brains got out to an early lead with Max redeeming himself for the reward challenge. Brawn started to close the gap, until they started to completely fall apart allowing the Brains to pull further ahead. As Laura and Indy got to work on the puzzle, Nash ate it trying to get to the Brawns one. And then proceeded to just watch and then actively hinder as Noonan tried to close the gap. Which obviously meant Indy and Laura snatched victory for the Brains.

Back at camp the Brawns quickly turned their attention to taking out Nash, who tragically knew he would have to play his idol. He, meanwhile, decided they should get rid of Candy, who we barely know and well, that breaks my heart as she gives country Courtney Yates vibes. He quickly rallied some troops, however thankfully, his pushiness pissed off Kristin. He meanwhile continued his assault locking in numbers one by one, until coming up to Noonan who admitted she is nervous given he is 100% safe. Clearly signalling she wants to vote for him. Jesse thankfully was equally as pissed, thinking they should continue to focus on him as he is potentially arrogant enough not to play it. He and Noonan rallied a counterattack, with everyone ready to split votes on Nash and Ursula to control the vote no matter what. Oh then we learnt that even his allies PD and Zen were considering joining them to flush Nash’s idol

Sweet Noonan was obviously thrilled with the turn of events, sadly unaware that Zen was letting him know that the only way to save himself was to play his idol and vote for Ursula. This enraged one week wonder Nash, who stomped off to let her know she is the new target rather than Candy. Speaking of Candy, Paulie and Noonan – my new fave duo since Shonella – were busy letting her know that she is Nash’s target and as such, needs to not panic to avoid people turning from Ursula. Or, you know, Nash not playing his idol. Nash meanwhile was busy talking to Morgan and Kate, assuring them he will protect them if they join him and get rid of Candy instead of Ursula. But given his argument was to target Kate next, you’d hope she would stick with Paulie, Noonan, Ben and Jesse rather than the attention-seeking, chaos agent.

At tribal council JLP quickly addressed Nash and his idol, who doubled down on needing to make big moves from the very start. He gloated about finding the idol five minutes in, with Noonan pointing out that they all learnt about it six minutes in, which was a dumb move. And all he cared about was forcing everyone to play the game from the very first moments and play hard. Candy meanwhile got sassy, pointing out it is a bold move while Paulie straight up said that Nash has no hope of making it anywhere near the end after how he started the game. Zen meanwhile defended his ally, though pointed out it wasn’t the smartest move for Nash to try and align with him within five minutes of arriving. Nash continued to play cute, pretending he was considering not playing it before Candy announced that she knew she was Nash’s target, with Ursula pointing out that she is a target too, and for no other reason than being perceived as an ally of Nash. 

Ursula pointed out Candy was a target because she was weaker in challenge, with Candy in turn pointing out that not all challenges are strength based and she could be an asset where Ursula can’t. Leading to Ursula doubling down on being an asset every day of the week, so a couple of people considering voting Nash could easily just switch to Candy and guarantee her strength stays not matter what. With Kate and Morgan whispering about it being a good idea. As Zaddy Paulie looked on nervously. With that the tribe voted, Nash did end up playing his idol and poor Candy tragically found herself becoming the first boot of the season.

By the time Candy arrived at Loser Lodge, I was simmering with rage. I quickly pulled her in for a hug and gave a shrug, because honestly, there wasn’t much she could do to navigate the chaos that Nash stupidly caused in the first days. Given the circumstances, there really wasn’t much I could actually say to her other than my go-to line that being a first boot is fundamentally more memorable than every other place in the pre-merge, so at least she will be remembered. Plus, she was doomed by Nash’s terrible move which screams robbed goddess, which makes her primed for a return. So between that and the Ricotta and Candried Tomato Roulade I whipped up, she was feeling better in no time.

I love nothing more than a little roulade. They are one of those meals that look fancy and like you’ve put in a lot of effort, but are actually shockingly simple to whip. Simple and delicious, the ultimate combo.

Enjoy!

Ricotta and Candried Tomato Roulade
Serves: 4.

Ingredients
600g chicken breasts
8 slices prosciutto
200g firm ricotta
½ cup parmesan, grated
100g sundried tomatoes, sliced
1 tbsp sage leaves, thinly sliced
1 egg
salt and pepper, to taste

Method
Preheat the oven to 180C fan-forced.

Slice each chicken breast in half lengthways, and flatten with a frying pan to form half-centimetre slices.

Place a piece of cling on the bench and layer the strips of prosciutto, overlapping slightly, to form a rectangle. Top with the chicken to cover, pressing to make sure there are no gaps (or as few as possible).

Combine the cheeses, zest, tomatoes, sage and egg in a bowl with a good whack of salt and pepper, and form into a sausage-shape along the middle of the chicken. Using the cling, slowly roll the chicken to enclose the cheesy filling, with the prosciutto sealing it into a giant sausage. Place on a lined baking sheet, seam side down and bake in the oven for 30 minutes, or until the chicken is cooked through and the prosciutto is crispy.

Remove from the oven and allow to rest for five minutes before slicing and serving with your favourite side. And devouring, like our tragic first boot.


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Peta Habennetto Chicken Nachos

Australian Survivor, Australian Survivor: Titans V Rebels, Main, Poultry, Street Food, TV, TV Recap

Previously on Australian Survivor the Titans finally managed to jag a win at the reward challenge, though given it was kind of an everyone’s a winner situation, it was a given. Sadly for them, that is where it stopped as despite a hefty lead in the immunity challenge, the Rebels pulled a come from behind win and spent another night chilling in harmony. Back at camp, Jess decided she was in charge and as such, opted to target the man who saved her the previous night, Eden. And as her confidence grew, she became a little chaotic, as she performed for a non-existent jury and turned everyone off. Almost forcing them to band together to blindside her.

The next day things were far more harmonious as Viola and Valeria continued to be iconic. Eden, meanwhile, was still annoyed to see his name at the previous tribal council. He approached Mark, Caroline and Kitty to thank them for having his back before they anointed themselves the Middle Aged Mafia and yeah, I live for it TBH. Despite the fact somebody that is younger than me refers to themselves as middle aged. Over at the Rebels, Peta and Scott were taking it easy doing some yoga and manifesting a balance or puzzle challenge. She then disappeared to catch up with her allies – Tobias, Sarah and Alex – as she watched the Kelli and Raymond show, worrying whether she will be able to bite her tongue long term. Peta and Sarah tried to figure out who would be best to join them, and I assume, be dragged to the end at their whim. Since that worked so well on the Titans tribe.

Sadly for her, Queen Kirby was watching like an absolute hawk and clocked that she felt like she was running things. And while Kirby planned to play an under the radar game, she was ready to make some quiet moves to get rid of Peta. Feras pulled her and Garrick aside, clocking her strategy and using it as a way to lock in the natural alliances that have already formed. Though trust, while she is concerned about the Cuddle Crew, she also didn’t want to shut off any options. Right on cue, Peta approached Kirby and warned her that divisions were forming and suggested it would be smart for her to work closely with the stronger crew. And holy hell, how did the strong people on both tribes clearly botch this in the exact same way.

The tribes came together in the shallows with Jonathan – Alex and Nathan thankfully in their speedos – for a physical reward challenge where, in rounds, they would race to have one person exit a cage. First tribe to three jagging an epic food basket. Sarah and Rianna were first to face off against Viola and Kitty, and damn, it was scrappy as hell before Queen V made a break to score the first point for the Titans. Jaden and Nathan faced off against Alex and Tobias and hot damn, we’re losing a speedo tonight. Wait, no, both the speedos ran away with it – on their respective bodies – and tried to escape with Nathan scoring another point for Titans. Valeria and Caroline faced off against Aileen and Kelli, with Aileen eventually making a break and scoring the first point for the Rebels. Winna and Mark then faced off against Feras and Ray, if you could even call it that, as Mark shot out and won the challenge for the Titans without any contact.

Oh and Kelli made a play to bang Nathan. So while she is super annoying, I also find her fundamentally relatable.

Back at camp the tribe were overjoyed to discover their basket of food. Until they discovered it was made up of unmarked cans, though you know Jaden was pumped for the one identifiable one, spam. Even though Mark opted to take it, no doubt assuming nobody wanted it. After smashing his can of peaches, Jaden went for a swim with Nathan, who was looking forward to a swap where they can align with the alphas at the Rebels. Speaking of them, Alex and Peta were talking about how Nathan was clearly trying to signal them at the challenge. They went for a walk to get some water before parlaying that into an idol hunt and despite calling themselves Barbie and Ken, managed to jag it without a clue. Which only managed to make them more and more confident, as they vowed to keep it between them.

That night the Rebels were marvelling at the stars as Kelli and Raymond continued to run their mouths and destroy the peace. Peta, Alex, Tobias and Sarah sat alone snacking, floating that maybe now would be the right time to throw a challenge and get rid of one of the irritating people. As to quote Alex, “Kelli annoys the shit out of me.” Sadly for them, however, throwing a challenge often backfires and given the narrative of the season appears to be pride coming before the fall, I see one of them exiting soon. Potentially with an idol in her pocket, perchance.

Jonathan returned to oversee the latest immunity challenge where the tribes would have to race load a series of sacks onto a heavy platform and slingshot, and navigate it through a series of obstacles, use a machete to cut open a bag to release sandbags, use said sandbags to knock over blocks and then use the blocks to solve a puzzle. Given three of the stronger people were actively trying to throw the challenge, the Rebels quickly fell out of it as the Titans lined their sled up at the end of the course and got to shooting. Nathan released all the blocks as the Rebels continued to saunter through the course, giving Eden and Charles a massive lead on the puzzle. While Tobias pretended to struggle with the slingshot. Finally Kirby switched in and made quick work of the puzzle pieces, though it wasn’t enough as the Titans jagged their first immunity win. Eventually, despite the fact they had a single piece in the wrong spot but couldn’t see it until the Rebels only had one left too.

As Tobias, Alex and Peta did a really bad job of looking disappointed to have lost.

Back at camp most of the tribe were dejected as Tobias tried to blame the wet ground for his bombing. Before he, Alex, Sarah and Peta peeled off and agreed they were thrilled to go to tribal council and trim the fat in Kelli. They pulled most of the tribe to the well to lock it in, with Raymond offering to go talk to her and ask what she was thinking. As he exited, Peta then suggested they split the vote between Kelli and Raymond, because of course she did. Kirby meanwhile was busy quietly watching everything until the Cuddle Crew dropped by and asked her to split the vote. Though her face was quizzical as hell, which should have been an answer. Tobias then looped in Feras who went to loop Garrick in on the plan, but instead, they clocked that the challenge was thrown. 

After confirming their suspicions together, Feras went to talk to Kirby and Rianna to warn that the challenge was thrown. Kirby then threw out that Peta was way too confident and as such, clearly thinks she is in control, making it the perfect time to blindside her. Kirby then went person to person locking everyone in on this plan before trying to calm Kelli, who grew paranoid she may get idolled out. While Kirby stayed calm and steady, pointing out that the Cuddle Crew are so confident everyone is voting for her that even if they have an idol, they won’t play it. And while Garrick and Kirby worried her acting was going to ruin the plan, I actually think she sold her chaotic nerves.

And meditation.

As she ommed out, the Cuddle Crew looked ready to scream, willing away the hours until they could vote her out. Feras meanwhile was worried she was doing too much, asking her to stop with the theatrics. She then took the fake tears to Aileen, before Aileen was summoned by Peta, asking if she was scrambling. She assured her that Kelli is honestly just crying and not floating plans, and while Peta promised us she will play the idol if she feels nervous, I honestly don’t think she would. Feras, Aileen and Kirby caught up, with the latter reiterating that Peta is so confident, she will not even consider herself at risk. Kirby then realised the tribe is so united against Kelly, that her vote doesn’t even matter and as such, pulled Rianna aside to float them voting with the Cuddle Alliance, so they could continue to play both sides and pretend they were equally as blindsided.

At tribal council the Rebels lit their torches and took their seats as Alex opened up about how not having to come to tribal council for a week gave them plenty of time for relationships to form. Raymond agreed it was nice to understand how everyone ticks and after a week, he likes most of them. Which, lol. Peta admitted she is confident she is on the wrong side of the vote before Kelli continued her acting tour de force, pretending she knows she is going home. Alex then asked if she contributes around camp, with Kelli pointing out she helps with the fire at night, while he and his friends all sleep cuddling by it. This pissed off Alex – and made me not love him anymore, TBH – before Kelli admitted she is sure his allies are all voting for her so it doesn’t matter what she says.

Peta admitted tribal is the place of blindsides and idols, which made Feras smile like a cheshire cat. Which in turn made Kirby look a little nervous, before he took it one step further, saying people need to be made an example of and put in their place. This made the Cuddle Crew appear to be super nervous, given they all felt the vote was rather united. Talk turned to the idols, with Raymond admitting he is in trouble because he was caught looking for one, rather than finding it. Garrick spoke about having suspicions about where an idol may be, before Alex made a not so subtle plea to the tribe that if you’re nervous and have an idol, you should play it. Which appeared to make Peta consider it, leading to Feras expertly suggesting if you’re that nervous at the first tribal council, maybe the game isn’t for you. And if you’ve heard a name, now would be a good time to trust it.

With that the tribe voted, Peta held on to her idol and like Frankie, was crushed to learn that most of the tribe hated her and the buff crew, as she was swiftly booted from the game. And side note, Alex, I am so disappointed in you for your attitude, despite the hot pink speedo. As she arrived at Loser Lodge, I pulled her in for a big hug and despite reading the alphas on both tribes for letting arrogance get in the way, assured her that despite the loss, her exit was iconic and TBH, sometimes that is all you can hope for. As I served up a plate of Peta Habennetto Chicken Nachos on her way to the airport.

This nachos is honestly glorious. A copycat of the GYG version, it is fiery and fresh, with a punch of tangy salsa and creamy avocado to have you coming back for more. And dry up even the most shocked tears.

Enjoy!

Peta Habennetto Chicken Nachos
Serves: 6.

Ingredients
500g chicken breasts
5 cloves garlic, minced
1 lime, zested and juiced
1 tbsp olive oil
1 tbsp habanero sauce, plus extra to serve
2 tsp chilli powder
1 tsp cumin
1 tsp smoked paprika
1 tsp salt
½ tsp oregano
¼ tsp black pepper
500g corn chips
2 cups cheddar cheese, grated
400g can black beans
½ cup Pico de Vincent Gallo
1 cup Salsa Struthers
1 cup Lady Gaugamole
sour cream, to taste

Method
Combine the chicken, garlic, lime zest and juice, olive oil, habanero and spices in a large bowl, cover and pop in the fridge to marinate for a couple of hours.

Preheat the oven to 180C.

Once the chicken is saucy, pop it on a lined baking sheet and pop in the oven to bake for 20-30 minutes, or until cooked through and a little charred on the outside. Remove from the oven and leave to cool for about 15 minutes before roughly chopping.

Once ready, layer six bowls with some corn chips and sprinkle with the cheese. Top with black beans, pico de gallo, salsa, chicken and a little more cheese. Place the bowls on a baking sheet and place under a medium grill for five minutes, or until the cheese is melty and delicious.

Remove, top with sour cream, guac and habanero. And then devour.


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Chickiki Coern Soup

Canada's Drag Race 4, Canada’s Drag Race, Main, Poultry, Soup, TV, TV Recap

Previously on Canada’s Drag Race the dolls competed in the first ever Lip Sync Slay Off Extravaganza. Not to be confused with a Lip Sync LalapaRuza, which is a different thing. Just let Canada have it, ok? And since it would leave four of the dolls in the bottom and Miss Thing Golden Beaver refused to save two from the lip sync, it would be the first double boot in Canada’s Drag Race herstory. After Nearah flipped her way to the final two, she promptly defeated Aurora and opted to save her friend Denim from the bottom. Leaving Kiki to dominate the bottom three lip sync, sending Aimee and Kitten out the door back-to-back. Followed by the icon herself, Golden Beaver.

Backstage the dolls were devastated to have lost two such iconic queens in one go. Though quickly moved on when they realised that they were now in the top six. Nearah meanwhile was feeling her oats to have a win under her belt, though was still nervous about a design challenge popping in and getting her eliminated. Though trust, she wanted Denim’s help should one come up, given she can no longer rely on the Golden Beaver. Oh and then everyone read Denim for being the only winless queen, though she vowed one was coming. So it is either this week. Or she is in the bottom, because editors are icons themselves.

The next day the dolls were feeling it; exhausted and in need of a rest. Instead of getting one, Brooke dropped by and they learnt that while they would get to sit down in a mini challenge, they would still have to be in quick drag as they take sex advice calls from the audience. Melinda took it very seriously, Nearah couldn’t read, Venus was an effortless star, Denim was ridiculous, Aurora was solid and Kiki was wise and cute in equal measure. And given Venus is a consistent star, she took out victory. Oh and then they were reminded that winning isn’t everything, as this week they’d be starring in Drags to Riches: The Unauthorised Brooke Lynn Hytes Story. That’s right, it is time for the rusical!

The dolls split up to listen to the numbers, with Melinda, Nearah and Denim desperate to play Baby Brooke Lynn. So they auditioned, though Nearah gave nothing given she was confident she could do anything. So Melinda got the showtune number. Venus and Kiki meanwhile fought for the Opera number, with the latter offering to take Cabaret to try something different. Aurora took out ballet era Brooke while Nearah reluctantly took the pop star style drag race era, leaving Denim with a gospel number for Brooke’s current hosting life.

With that, the cast split up to get down the lines before Brooke dropped by to check in on the dolls. Melinda was pumped to play Baby Brooke, loving the chance to show off her dance skills. Aurora meanwhile looked forward to giving the professional dancer era, despite not actually having had any training. Kiki was looking forward to having fun, while Nearah was confident in her ability to shine despite the fact she had essentially done the role last week. While Denim pretended she was excited to close the show selling modern Brooke. And Venus was feeling the pressure, but we know she is totally taking it, so who cares.

The dolls pivoted to the mainstage to meet Hollywood Jade and get the choreography down. And since Aurora got to dance alongside two ripped hotties, she slayed and lived for every moment. While Venus tried to hide her boner side of stage. Melinda meanwhile struggled with the counts, though I’m confident it is a fake out, given she had to fight for the role and mother will shine. Kiki had props and promptly struggled, while Nearah was perfect from the very beginning. And told Hollywood and the girls she could do something harder, should it be required. Venus meanwhile was busy stuck in her head as she struggled to stay still, like the roll required. And Denim was a mess. But she is cute and fun, so I feel like she will turn it out when the time comes.

Elimination Day arrived with the dolls getting their blonde on as Aurora spoke about how the mini challenge was liberating, given she is quite reserved in her life. Talk obviously turned to sex, with Kiki getting dicked down once a day minimum, Venus proudly called herself a slut, while Melinda spoke about monogamy bing a construct, while Denim and Nearah spoke about finding their person and not wanting to share.

Brooke, Traci and Brad were joined by the iconic – finally – Countess Luann  – finally – as From Drags to Riches premiered and closed with Melinda straight up dressed like Megan. And it is iconic and an instant slay. As are the back-up dancers showing off midriff. Aurora’s ballet era number was stunning as she served pass around party bottom, Kiki had fun despite being a mess before Nearah arrived and absolutely demolished. Venus gave all the emotion and had the judges eating out of the palm of her hand before Denim closed the show having a ball, despite being a little muted.

On the Always a Bridesmaid runway Melinda was an absolute mess in a fluff of red, which is exactly what the assignment is, so I live. Aurora was stunning as a corpse bridesmaid, or as Luann said, Ramona. Kiki gave us granny bridesmaid and was having so much fun, Nearah served southern belle in peach, Venus was perfect as a bouquet flower while Denim gave garter glam. And it was so much fun.

The judges lived for Melinda fighting to be the youngest Brooke, as she ended up giving Baby Jane iconography in the role. But they wanted her to give more on the runway. Again. Aurora received wall to wall praise, from doing perfect pointe to giving a stunning runway that was outside the box. And gave Lu a chance to tell her elegance is learned, which is important, my friend. Kiki’s look was beloved, though she was read for so many missteps during the performance, despite not letting it get to her. Nearah too received a tonne of praise, though she was cautioned to give variety. Despite taking the last role and being stuck with it. Venus was praised for having the runway of the episode, and again to quote Lu, being cool and not uncool. Oh and they lived for a riveting performance. While Denim’s creative look received universal praise, though her performance in the rusical was way too subdued as the rest of the dolls joined her for the finale.

Backstage Denim and Kiki were confident they would be bottoming this evening, though for the latter, maybe that was because Kiki was ok if she had to lip sync until the end. Denim meanwhile was annoyed that she didn’t take the role she wanted. Melinda and Nearah meanwhile weren’t sure which of them would be joining them in the bottom three, given both of them were kinda sure they were tops giving they slayed with minimal issues. Despite the judges hating Melinda’s runway.

Ultimately Nearah and Venus were sent to safety as Aurora took out her second win of the season. At the other end of the pack, Melinda’s performance once again saved her as she was sent to safety, leaving Denim and Kiki to battle it out for the final slot to Seven Day Fool by Julie Black. And, well, both dolls turned a show, as Kiki felt her oats and Denim served cutsie sex bomb. Which proved to be enough as Denim was deemed safe, leaving Kiki to sadly sashay away.

As the iconic fashion designer arrived backstage, I pulled her in for an epic hug and assured her that despite not snatching the crown, she has literally given us multiple crowning looks that will live forever in herstory. And that, is kinda cooler. Plus, she still turned a fun performance and arguable won the lip sync, so going home as a robbed goddess is always a win. As is a big, warming bowl of Chickiki Coern Soup.

Sweet and hearty, this soup contains everything you could want on a cold winters night. The chicken melts in your mouth as the rich broth washes away all your problems. Almost like a savoury banana bread, you know?

Enjoy!

Chickiki Coern Soup
Serves: 6.

Ingredients
1 tbsp olive oil
1 onion, finely chopped
5 garlic cloves, minced
2 celery stalks, finely chopped
1 carrot, peeled and sliced into half-moons
1 leek, thinly sliced
2 chicken breasts, diced
5 cups chicken stock
1 cup macaroni
310g can creamed corn
kosher salt and pepper, to taste
1 cup baby spinach leaves, washed and sliced

Method
Pop a lug of oil in a stock pot over medium heat and saute the onion, garlic, celery, carrot and leek for about 5 minutes or until soft and sweet. Add the chicken and cook, stirring, for five minutes.

Pour in the stock, pasta and creamed corn, stir well and bring to a boil. Reduce to a simmer and cook, stirring infrequently for 15 minutes, or until the pasta is cooked. Season to taste.

Remove from the heat and stir through the spinach until wilted. Serve and devour, richly.


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Zucchini Chicken Kanoodles

Canada's Drag Race 4, Canada’s Drag Race, Main, Pasta, Poultry, TV, TV Recap

Previously on Canada’s Drag Race the dolls put on a suprisingly fun Snatch Game as mother Melinda take out her first win of the season and proved that she was more than just good drama. Returning the favour by saving her friend Kiki and leaving Aurora to dominate the lip sync and send Luna to the house. Brooke then announced that this week would be a little different, as the dolls would compete in a Lip Sync Slay Off Extravaganza, with three people lip syncing and two people going home. In the first round, Melinda defeated Kitten, Aurora sent Denim to the bottom four, Nearah got revenge on her nemesis Aimee and Venua won out over Kiki. And I decided to hedge my bets and assumed Aimee would be one of the dolls going home, I gave her culinary comfort before she did go home.

But I’ve gotten ahead of myself.

In round two, Melinda and Aurora did battle to Boys Wanna Be Her by my queen Peaches. And yeah, it was obviously a slay from both of the dolls. But Aurora played her leg like a guitar and as such, rightly took out the win while Melinda was sent to safety. Nearah and Venus then slayed the shit out of Pull Up by Keys N Krates featuring Haviah Mighty. And yeah, it was a show. But once again, Nearah proved to be an assassin, taking out the win and sending Venus to safety. As such, Nearah stuck around on stage as Aurora joined her in the fight for the win to Black Velvet. And since it is literally one of the best songs of all time, the dolls gave it their all and did it justice. But given it is all sex, Nearah had the upper hand and parlayed it into her first win of the season and gave her the power of the Golden Beaver, allowing her to save one of the bottom four while the remaining trio would fight to avoid being a double boot.

Backstage the dolls came together to contgratulate Neaah on her win, before she asked if anyone wanted to volunteer to earnt their place in the top six and lip sync. Everyone, obviously, kept quiet though. Aimee pretended she didn’t hate Nearah as she wanted to be safe, while Denim was very, very anxious, given she doesn’t feel like Nearah can be trusted to be fair and she is a threat. Essentially. Kitten meanwhile spoke about all her skills, immediately stirking her from being saved by Nearah. While Kiki desperately hoped that Nearah’s passion for stirring the pot would save her. Given it would make it a third time for her.

Ultimately Nearah opted to save Denim, as Kitten, Aimee and Kiki took their places to fight for the final slot to Lara Fabian’s I Will Love Again. And damn, Kiki found her fire as she turned emotions and tricks in equal measure. Kitten meanwhile had emotion, while Aimee was in the pocket, but there is no denying this was Kiki’s show and as such, she was rightly saved and sent through to the top six, while Aimee and Kitten sashayed away.

Given we already covered Aimee’s departure before it happened – hey, we know I’m psychic and invented time travel, after all – I could focus all my attention on the ultimate robbed goddess of the season, Kitten. As she arrived backstage, I pulled her in for a massive hug and immediately burst into tears. Through sobs, I told her how grateful I was to have a legend actually turn up and slay week after week, as so often the older gals don’t get the flowers they deserve. And TBH, if it weren’t for a double boot, I could easily have seen her making it to the top four. However, tragically, that wasn’t the case and instead we had to eat our feelings with big bowls of Zucchini Chicken Kanoodles.

Yeah, yeah – zucchini as pasta is a thing we’re all keen on now (particualrly in the new year, new me period), but in pasta? Well, that isn’t something we love. Until you try this, that is. Juicy, sweet and oh so fresh, it is the perfect throw-together meal that leaves you feeling nourished and smug, given it is healthy.

Enjoy!

Zucchini Chicken Kanoodles
Serves: 4.

Ingredients
250g angel hair spaghetti
1 tbsp olive oil
1 tbsp butter
500g chicken breast, diced
2 zucchinis, halved, deseeded and sliced
1 capsicum, deseeded and sliced
5 garlic cloves, minced 
1 tsp Italian seasoning
1 lemon, zested and juiced
½ cup parmesan cheese, grated
½ cup Italian parsley, diced
¼ cup pine nuts, toasted
kosher salt and pepper, to taste

Method
Bring a large pot of salted water to a boil and cook the pasta to package instructions, reserving a cup of pasta water before draining.

While that is all coming together, pop the olive oil and butter in a medium pan and saute the chicken, stirring, for about ten minutes, or until cooked through. Add the zucchini and capsicum and cook for a couple of minutes, or until tender. Fold in the garlic, Italian seasoning, lemon zest and juice and cook for another minute. 

Add the pasta to the pan and stir until well combined, adding water to thin it out as needed. Stir in the parmesan, pine nutes and parsley, and adjust the seasoning and water to taste and desired consistency.

Serve and then devour, like a damn icon.


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Chickemily Flippenne in Parmesan Cream Sauce

Main, Pasta, Poultry, Survivor, Survivor 45, TV, TV Recap

Previously on Survivor Austin handed his idol off to Julie ahead of a team immunity challenge, unsure what weird variation of tribal council could screw his ally out of the game. Thankfully it was all for nought as Jeff opted against too much chaos, allowing the Rebas to take control of the tribe. After Emily jagged a reward and took the ladies for an overnight vacay, they locked in a plan to blindside Bruce should he not win immunity. The only catch being his pesky idol. As such, they got to work convincing him he was safe and that Mama J – aka Julie – was the true target as she was such a massive threat to win. After Austin took out immunity, Emily worked overtime on Bruce to the point I wasn’t actually sure what the plan was until everyone banded together and blindsided Bruce with an idol in his pocket.

Back at camp the tribe were thrilled to have pulled off an epic blindside. None more so than Katurah, who was giddy to have finally felled her lecturing, micro-managing nemesis. Julie meanwhile was shocked that she was the one he voted for, given ironically, she was the only one willing to work with him. Emily jumped in to provide context, pointing out she went to Bruce and told him that Julie was playing him and that she was happy to join him to blindside her to protect him, which is the actual reason he never played his idol. And while everyone was shocked and excited to hear how detailed her plan was, Julie grew wary of just how threatening Emily could prove to be.

After everyone went to sleep, the Reba 4 caught up by the shore, congratulating each other for officially taking control before promptly locking in an official final four. Julie and Drew then went back to camp, leaving Austin and Dee to flirt and be all cute as they watched the stars and yeah, I ship them. As they likened themselves to Boston Rob and Amber (kinda), and ugh, I love love. But given they vowed to take each other to the final three, you know someone random is winning the final immunity challenge and they will be the duo facing off in fire for the final spot. Mark. My. Words.

The next day Jake continued to feel left out, hoping that the seven votes he has received thus far will be it for the game. Meaning he will be a zero vote finalist. Mark those words too. He and Katurah caught up, locking in an alliance to go to the end, no doubt because Katurah can already tell that he wouldn’t get votes at the end. Jake opened up about being a lawyer, encouraging Katurah and telling her she could be a lawyer herself, if she wanted. After Julie joined them, Katurah felt compelled to share her story and while she didn’t admit to being a lawyer, she spoke about her harrowing childhood, being pulled out of school at 10 after her family joined a cult and that she missed years, before her mum pulled them out of the cult when she was earmarked as the leaders next wife. And then she worked her arse off to catch up and continued to thrive until she achieved her dreams to fight for other black women.

And yeah, you know I am rooting hard for Katurah now.

A boat then arrived at camp offering a journey for one, with everyone wanting to go, meaning they had to draw rocks. With Emily, the most reluctant, the one to win the trip. As she departed, Julie and Drew spoke about Emily slowly building her resume and being a threat. Julie then suggested that maybe now would be the time to get rid of her, which Drew quickly shut down. Making Julie nervous as she noticed him getting more and more suspicious. Julie and Dee caught up, with the latter agreeing that Drew is the one she is most suspicious of. Particularly since he is close with Emily, and they just can’t trust that she will tell the truth about what happens on her journey.

Speaking of which, Emily arrived at Journey Island where she wandered the shore and discovered the ring puzzle that four people failed at earlier this season. However she was too scared about not having her vote at seven, so bounced, despite knowing everyone would be back at camp talking about targeting her.

Katurah and Jake were busy practising fire with Drew, who wanted to know who they would be willing to go to the end with. And while they were coy, Katurah agreed that she just doesn’t think she could beat Julie or Dee. Leading to Drew, eventually, getting them to agree that getting rid of Julie should be their absolute priority. Katurah then wandered off and caught up with Austin, pointing out that she isn’t really sure who she wants to go to the end with, but she does already know who she doesn’t want to go with: Julie. With Austin quickly and calmly agreeing that she is right, particularly since she wanted to get Julie out, followed by Emily. Not his girlfriend. Austin then caught up with Drew to see what he was thinking, with Drew working hard to convince him that getting rid of Julie should be the priority, given she isn’t even willing to return his idol.

Emily returned to camp, talking everyone through the experience in full, honest detail. Which obviously meant Dee and Julie didn’t buy it. Emily went for a walk, with Drew following to let her know that Julie is well and truly out to get her. Leaving the duo to go person to person to rally the troops against each other. 

Jeffrey finally made an appearance for this week’s immunity challenge where they would have to unravel rope that they would be tethered to, then race through a series of obstacles, toss sandbags at blocks and then use the blocks to solve a rainbow puzzle. Oh and the winner would get an epic BBQ reward for them back at camp. Jake was first to make a start before quickly realising he didn’t have enough rope, allowing Drew to power ahead as the rest of the tribe struggled. Austin closed the gap and it became a battle as the boys tried to figure out the puzzle. With Drew eventually figuring out how to make it work on both sides, handing himself immunity. As he channelled Michelle and kicked shit, just for funsies. You know Probst then offered Drew the chance to share his BBQ with someone, opting to take Jake given they haven’t had a reward. And then Austin, to keep guys’ night alive.

Back at camp the girls went off to luxuriate in the ocean and read up on the history of buffs, given they are all planning to target either Julie and Emily. Eventually Dee suggested they vote out Jake just to make things less awkward. We then caught up with the boys who were smashing their burgies and TBH, it truly did look lovely. They then debated the merits of getting rid of Julie or Emily and while Jake didn’t exactly trust anyone, he did trust that they needed him this round and as such, happily jumped on board the Julie vote. Agreeing to keep Dee out of the loop as long as possible to reduce the chances of her playing the idol.

They came back together where the guilt started to play on Austin as he worried about telling Dee. As such, they went for a walk together along the shore with Dee sharing she is locked to get rid of Emily, before Austin casually, awkwardly, shared that there is currently a growing movement against Julie. Which Dee obviously hated, though she tried to hide it, given she didn’t want her emotions getting the best of her. After thinking on it, she figured trusting her heart has proven successful thus far, so caught up with Julie at the shelter and told her to play her idol tonight. Julie then caught up with Jake and Emily to suggest the plan was one of the girls, though she would happily make a move against Austin if they wanted. After Julie went for a walk, Emily told Julie that she is trying to rally the troops against Austin, which resulted in all of them descending into chaos. As Drew and Austin bickered about whether Dee spilled the beans and Dee tried to talk Julie out of targeting Austin and to stick to the plan to blindside Emily.

At tribal council Drew and Julie spoke about how the game gets easy as it goes along, given everyone becomes more and more desensitised to blindsiding people. Katurah spoke about the fact you need to successfully compartmentalise, while Emily pointed out that everyone has full bags with them tonight as nobody can trust they will be safe. Drew tried to be cagey before unleashing about how they are in a new page of history, a wanky way of saying they are thinking who they want to face off against in the final three. Julie and Emily spoke about how they have tried to steel their emotions as they planned to vote out someone they love, with Austin agreeing it has come to the point of having to simply figure out who’s motives align with yours. While Katurah admitted she was scared about the chance of an idol, given everyone played their cards so close to their chest.

With that the tribe voted as everyone – including Dee, as per the plan – voted for Julie, before she played Austin’s gifted idol in a very showy move, sending Emily out of the game with a single, solitary vote. Emily found her way to Ponderosa by following my screaming tears, before pulling me in for a massive hug and assuring me she would be fine. Sadly for her, it didn’t pacify me, as I screamed that I would not be. After 40 minutes of heaving sobs though, I finally realised I will be fine because Emily is one of the breakout stars of the new era and as such, will return multiple times over the years and will likely win on her second outing. And until then, we’ll always have Chickemily Flippenne in Parmesan Cream Sauce.

This is one of those perfect soothing dishes for the end of the year when we’re all limping to a break. Rich and creamy, with a sweet punch of tomato, this all works in harmony to fill your stomach and warm hearts. Just like Emily throughout the season.

Enjoy!

Chickemily Flippenne in Parmesan Cream Sauce
Serves: 6.

Ingredients
500g penne
1 tbsp olive oil
2 chicken breasts, diced
1 cup button mushrooms, thinly sliced
4 garlic cloves, minced
1 cup sundried tomatoes, drained and roughly chopped
1 tsp Italian seasoning
1 tbsp unsalted butter
1 tbsp flour
2 cups cream
1 cup parmesan cheese, grated
2 cups baby spinach, washed
salt and pepper, to taste

Method
Bring a pot of salted water to the boil and cook the pasta per the cooking instructions, minus a minute. Drain, run under cool water and to rest.

Heat the olive oil in a large skillet over medium heat and cook the chicken, stirring, for five minutes or so, or until cooked through. Add the mushrooms, garlic, sundried tomato and Italian seasoning, cooking until fragrant and the mushrooms are soft. Add the butter and flour and cook for a further couple of minutes before stirring in the cream. Bring to a near-boil, reduce to low and stir in the parmesan until smooth. Finally stir in the baby spinach and cook until wilted. Remove from the heat.

Once the pasta is ready, stir through the sauce, season and serve. Then add a little more parmesan and devour, like a boss. Ideally with a glass of confessional wine.


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Chicken Caesean Saladwards

Poultry, Salad, Survivor, Survivor 45, TV, TV Recap

Previously on Survivor King of the Boxer Brief, Zaddy Austin finally earned his vote back after looping in Dee and Julie about his Beware Advantage and the women promptly found the idol for him. At Belo, Katurah was over Bruce, capital O. V. A. H. Over at Lulu, Emily was mentored by Kaleb and slowly managed to form bonds with Sean and Sabiyah, and frankly started to slay. Despite winning the reward, Lulu couldn’t maintain the momentum as they went back to tribal council with Sabiyah looking to cut Kaleb as the biggest threat. Sadly for her, Emily looped him in and after Sabiyah sacrificed her vote to extend her idol – which she melted out of the wax live at tribal council – ended up voted out with said idol in her pocket.

Back at camp Sean pulled the others in for a hug, praising them for a blindside well played while Kaleb thanked Emily for keeping him in the loop and protecting him. As Sean grew more and more aware he is on the bottom, he simultaneously grew more and more shrill about how he just wished they included him in the blindside as he is thrilled to be out from under Sabiyah’s control. Sadly for him, both Kaleb and Emily realised he was performing to try and stay solid with them. The highlight being when he told Kaleb he never wanted to target him, with Emily laughing and pointing out it means he then wanted her out instead.

The next day the tribes came together with Probst where everyone was gagged to learn Sabiyah had been voted out. As they speculated about the drama of the previous tribal, Emily had a little chuckle about everyone living for the drama but pointing out it sucks to be the tribe that is split in half. As Brando questioned whether things may need a shuffle, Probst followed it up with the ultimate gag as he told everyone to drop their buffs as the tribes were switching up. New Reba was made up of Julie, Dee, Sifu, Jay and Sean, Kaleb was joined by Katurah, Bruce, Kellie and Jake on Lulu while Emily was an island at new Belo with Austin, Drew, Kendra and Brando.

Instead of a challenge, everyone was sent back to their new camps where Kaleb showed the OG Belos around the bland shelter. Bruce immediately started to break down in tears, realising Lulu was living on Tika’s beach and he started to relive the experience of being medically evacuated. He quickly rallied, assuring the tribe he just needed a moment, while poor Kaleb got to work saving himself from the bottom. Katurah asked him to tell everyone about Brandon’s journey and how he lost his vote, which obviously made Bruce realise how little Katurah trusts him. Jake pulled Kaleb aside to bond and see if there was anything there, assuring him that he would gladly vote anyone if it means they can go to the merge together and hopefully build some new alliances.

Over at new Belo everyone was excited to see Emily and get to know her away from delivering iconic sound bites at challenges. Kendra meanwhile was talking about their fishing hole and pulling together a fire, generally being an excellent hostess. As they sat down around the fire to get to know each other, Emily opened up about being on the outs of the tribe, telling everyone the entire dynamics and Sabiyah’s theatrical idol burning situation. As they got their bearings, Drew rightly focused his attention on wooing Emily so he and Austin could gain the upperhand within the tribe.

We finally checked in with new Reba where Sean gleefully started to spill the tea, talking about how he manifested the swap. Which J loved, feeling like she may have finally found someone she could truly align with. As they went off for a walk, Sifu, Julie and Dee speculated how much of a threat Sean could be, so got to work checking his bag for an idol. Sadly for them, he has an intricate way of securing his bag, so had to learn how to tie the same knots before they went through it, and learnt he was powerless. But damn, Dee and Julie are mother, no? J and Sean meanwhile were pledging their undying loyalty to each other, with J talking about how Sifu has always been on the outs of the tribe and as such, her plan would be to get rid of him at the next tribal council. J went back to the girls to let them know what she did, while Julie tried to caution her against getting rid of Sifu’s strength and sending them back to tribal again and again.

The next day things were still quite zen at Belo as Emily worried about whether she would be the swing vote or a safe consensus pick. Today she was bonding with Kendra while Austin and Drew went for a walk to decide where they could safely hide their collection of advantages. They desperately wanted to hang onto them for the merge though, so reiterated how badly they needed to get Emily. Which they promptly did, with her just grateful to have pulled an alliance together without having the looming pressure of tribal council over their head. And seeing her light up about being included and having some autonomy is just beautiful.

Back at Lulu Bruce was continuing to run at an 11. Kellie meanwhile was grateful to have played the middle at the beginning of the game thus far, given it has positioned her well for the swap. As Bruce assured her she was her number one, the duo got to work pulling in Kaleb. Sadly for them, Katurah watched it all and as soon as Kaleb was free, she pulled him aside to talk mad shit with Bruce and tried to pull him in to get rid of Bruce ASAP. And given she is calm and sensible, I think she just found herself a solid ally.

The tribes came together for the first immunity challenge as new tribes where they would have to swim to a cage and climb inside before carrying it into the shore. Then they would then have to dig themselves out to release a person to collect while the rest of the tribe would have to shoot baskets from within the cage, with the first two tribes to shoot all their basket jagging immunity. Lulu and Belo got out to an early lead, with Reba nipping at their heels. When they made it to the shore, Lulu started to pull ahead as Reba caught up with Belo as they struggled on the sand. Kaleb quickly landed two balls for Lulu before the other tribes finally joined him. Sadly it was too late as Kaleb landed his third and jagged himself immunity and flint for the first time. Austin meanwhile scored two points for Belo as Reba desperately tried to close the gap. Sadly for them, it was all for nothing as Austin landed the third one just ahead of Sifu, sending Reba to tribal council.

Sean for his fourth time in as many episodes, as Emily started to sob tears of joy for being safe.

We checked in with Lulu where Kaleb was rightly jubilant as Bruce tried to pretend he lost the flint which led to the first ever non-verbal confessional as Katurah rolled her eyes. Like a damn queen.

Back at Reba, Sean was heartbroken to still be on a losing tribe, questioning whether maybe he is the curse rather than Lulu. They caught up in the ocean where Dee made that exact joke, making Sean even more nervous than he should be. First he caught up with Sifu to talk about how close the girls are, assuring Sifu that if he wants to make a move and align with him, he will be loyal. J meanwhile was busy pointing out to Julie and Dee that it is safest to get rid of Sifu now, given if they go back to tribal council again, he could play an idol and instantly get one of the girls out. Whereas if they blindside him while Sean is still there, they could eliminate that threat. Julie was very against the idea, knowing they needed to keep strength at this point, unless they wanted to be decimated. Sadly, Dee and J were adamant and as such, they pulled Sean aside to loop him in on the plan and assured him that while they will continue to talk Reba strong at tribal, he is safe and to just hold firm.

Sadly for them, Sifu rightly grew nervous that Sean would be able to make things work with the women. While Sean just seemed dejected to be going to yet another tribal council.

Speaking of which, Reba arrived at tribal council where they spoke about how lucky they were to stay Reba strong post swap. Sean admitted he felt lucky after the swap, given he was on the outs after the last tribal council, while Julie got to work pretending the plan is to stay Reba strong. Sean spoke about how he is trying to stay and get to know everyone before J jumped in to talk about the importance of getting rid of the right people at the right time to win challenges. Sean spoke about how committed he is in challenges and how loyal he is which would be good post merge, sounding desperate to stay while Dee continued to pretend to be Reba strong and seemingly shut down his plan.

Sifu spoke about Sean’s positive energy and how much he has loved having him in the tribe, before Probst asked Sean what he has gotten from the game. Sean then gave a lovely speech about needing to learn from failure and that he loves and respects them. He admitted that growing up Mormon made him lose so much time and that playing Survivor allowed him to reclaim it, before breaking down and admitting that his adventure of a lifetime is being at home with his husband. And given how much they all want it, he would prefer they just all vote him out tonight. Jeff, obviously, didn’t love the idea of having yet another quit, as Sean admitting he is happy for them to be Reba strong and get rid of them. Probst pointed out he is simply engineering his own quit while the girls whispered to each other about granting his wish or gunning for Sifu.

With that the tribe voted and as per his request, they banded together to send Sean home. By way of Loser Lodge. Well, except for Dee who kept her vote against Sifu for shits, which seems like a bad decision. But that is a tale for another time. As Sean arrived at Loser Lodge, I pulled him in for a hug and told him to hold his head up high. I mean, I don’t love a quit, but the fact he had such a bad run in his four episodes, I kinda get it. Which is why I served up a big Chicken Caesean Saladwards on his way to the airport.

I know conventional wisdom is that you don’t make friends with salad, but it really isn’t the case when done right. And there is no salad that does more right than this. Bacon, eggs and kilos and kilos of chicken breast? Sign. Me. Up.

Enjoy!

Chicken Caesean Saladwards
Serves: 2.

Ingredients
2 chicken breasts
2 tbsp olive oil
salt and pepper, to taste
1 recipe Palesar Taulad

Method
Heat the oil in a skill over medium-low heat. Season the chicken and cook the breast for about 5-8 minutes before flipping and cooking for another 10 minutes, or until cooked though. Remove from the skillet to rest for 5 minutes before roughly dicing.

Prepare the salad as per Palesar’s recipe before dividing the chicken over the salad and devouring, with love and glee.


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Chickie & Pumpkunty Wreath

Drag Race France, Drag Race France 2, Main, Poultry, TV, TV Recap

Previously on Drag Race France the remaining dolls were well and truly challenged as Nicky challenged them to throw a little Time Ball. Despite it being one of the more notoriously difficult challenges of the franchise, every single one of them slayed. Nicky decided to get a little shady and asked everyone to name who they think should go home, with the dolls gagging her by agreeing on frontrunner Sara for her single dud look. Not surprisingly, Keoina slayed and snagged her second win with the next gag of the episode being that she wasn’t alone, as Cookie (rightfully) joined her in victory. Moon meanwhile landed in the bottom alongside Sara, however Moon saved the biggest gag for last as she opted to exit the contest before the lip sync.

After Moon’s exit, the dolls returned backstage to talk through how sad they were to see her go, though grateful she put her mental health first. Sara meanwhile was conflicted, feeling a little guilty to have survived without a fight and feeling like she owed her place to Moon.

Things were far more upbeat the next day as the dolls giddily welcomed themselves back for another week. Well, until the cocorico struck and officially welcomed them, that is. Nicky stomped the stairs before ominously mentioning a twist before promptly pulling out the puppets for a cute little mini challenge. Why? Because everybody loves puppets! Duh. Keiona got to read Mami, Punani pulled out Keiona, Sara got Punani and Mami got Cookie, leaving Cookie with Sara. After beating their puppets to varying degrees of success, Keiona was adorbs as she bombed and Cookie served a slutty Sara before Punani arrived and finally bought comedy, as she expertly read Keiona. Sara read Punani for filth and was oh so good, while Mami closed the show brutally reading Cookie. And it was perfect.

Which was all it took to hand her victory.

Before departing, Nicky announced that for this week’s Maxi Challenge the dolls would be forming a girl group and performing live to Nicky’s original song. Oh and they were not the only band, as Ginger, Piche, Kitty, Vespi and Rose would be returning to compete for the right to return to the competition. Yep, we have a girl group returning challenge on our hands, All Stars 3 style! The best of the eliminated girls would lip sync against the worst of the top five, with the winner staying in the contest and the loser going home. So either keeping their place in the competition, or stealing a spot back in the new top five.

The OG top five sat down to work through the song and brainstorm choreography as the eliminated queens remained backstage as an ominous spectre over the episode, which TBH, feels like a missed opportunity. Knowing they would be facing a fiery fivetet, Keiona opted to take the lead of the group, working through the choreography and cataloguing the skills of the eliminated queens they were about to battle. They pivoted to the mainstage to properly work on the choreography and damn, the dolls were cohesive, on point and well, I feel sorry for the eliminated queens. Speaking of which, they snuck onto the stage to work through their choreography and catch up with the current top five. 

As the eliminated queens worked through their own choreo – with Piche showing the top of her thong, swoon – the top five ventured backstage to beat their mugs and reflect on the competition thus far and kiki about how close they have gotten. Talk turned to their respective profiles and how they’ve had to adapt their work the more famous they have gotten. They then spoke about the different spaces they work within and how people – particularly in America – have a misconception of how sexualised drag is and well, it is not the case and people just need to fuck right off. My words, not theirs.

Nicky, Daphne and Kiddy were joined by Victor Weinsanto and Virginie Despentes as the eliminated queens stomped the stage for their performance and well, let’s just say Piche was Piche perfect from start to finish. She had all the energy and lines, pulling focus through every single solo and well, it was not even close. The top five meanwhile were a little more even as everyone came to fight, dancing in complete synchronicity and all around proving just why they made the top five in the first place.

On the Brillex pour nous runway Keiona slayed as she vogued down the runway in a gorgeous blue and gold sequined jumpsuit, giving Cleopatra of the ballroom. Mami gave shimmering face, nips and corset, Cookie gave sparkly nude illusion and well, it was kind of a mess, Sara meanwhile brought the drama in a full length black sequin gown with reversible sequin embellishment like the kids Ts at H&M and yeah, it was a slay. Despite the fucking H&M reference. While Punani shone head to toe as a straight up cartoon character.

Keiona, as usual, received universal praise for being a killer performer and slaying the hell out of the runway. Despite the fact the judges felt she brought herself down to her sisters level when it came to the choreography. Mami was beloved for her magnetism in the challenge and for making the runway work. Cookie meanwhile was read for being the weakest of the dolls in the performance, though they loved her camp runway. Sara meanwhile received universal praise for dominating the performance and giving all the drama on the runway. While Punani received top marks for giving comedy in the performance and serving a very creative runway.

Backstage the dolls toasted making it to the first go at the top five, with everyone agreeing how strong they performed and how nice it was to work together as one in the challenge. Talk turned to their competition with everyone agreeing Piche was far and away the star on that team. Cookie meanwhile felt she would be the one lip syncing tonight, though assured us and her sisters that she has fared well thus far and as such, has no fear about saving herself. Again.

Ultimately Sara took out her third win of the season, booking her spot in the semi finals alongside Keiona, Punani and Mami, leaving Cookie to battle for the final spot alongside Piche. Because duh. As soon as Et alors! by Shy’m kicked off, Piche kept the fire from the performance, stomping the floor and killing every damn moment; voguing and flipping, fierce and funny, she gave everything and rightly earned her place back in the competition as a sweet and gracious Cookie exited stage left.

Given Cookie left with such grace and humility, I was at a bit of a loss for words backstage, given I regularly have to remind them how good they are and that winning isn’t everything. While the latter is a lie (it is), the first is always true, but thankfully, given Cookie is such a damn star, she never lost sight of that. So all I had to do was give her a big hug, congratulate her on a stellar run and career, and toast it off with a Chickie & Pumpkunty Wreath.

You thought we were going to go with a cookie, didn’t you? Nope! When it looks like we’re going to zig, sometimes, we zag even if it needs to be shoehorned a little. But when it tastes as good as this – sweet, rich and a little camp – who cares what it’s called. Something, something rose by any other name, and all that.

Enjoy!

Chickie & Pumpkunty Wreath
Serves: 8.

Ingredients
1 tbsp olive oil
800g butternut pumpkin, deseeded and cut into a 3cm dice
salt and pepper, to taste
1 onion, sliced
500g chicken breast, diced
300g ricotta
1 cup fresh basil and parsley leaves, roughly chopped
¼ cup pine nuts, toasted
¼ cup parmesan cheese, grated
1 lemon, zested
4 garlic cloves, crushed
1 tsp chilli flakes
½ cup sundried tomatoes, drained and cut into strips
1 egg, whisked
2 sheets puff pastry, just thawed
2 tbsp mixed sesame seeds, to sprinkle

Method
Preheat the oven to 190C and line a large baking tray with baking paper. Toss the pumpkin in half the oil, season with a good whack of salt and pepper and bake for 30 minutes or until golden and tender. Transfer to a plate lined with a paper towel and leave to drain.

Heat the rest of the olive oil in a large frying pan over medium heat and sweat the onion for a couple of minutes. Add the chicken breast and cook for about ten minutes, or until the chicken is cooked through. Drain off all the excess fat and leave to cool.

Combine the ricotta, herbs, pine nuts, lemon zest, garlic, chilli and sundried tomatoes in a bowl. Stir and fold through the pumpkin, chicken and onion with a good whack of salt and pepper.

To assemble, place the pastry on the bench and cut in half. Press three together to form a long rectangle. Place the filling in a line down the centre, brush a side with some egg and roll the pastry to enclose. Slowly shape the log into a wreath, brushing the end with egg and pressing to close. Transfer to the fridge to set for about fifteen minutes.

Once the wreath has firmed up, cut the remaining pastry into strips. Brush the wreath with some egg, hatch the remaining pastry over the top for artistic flair – why the hell not, right? Brush with egg one final time, sprinkle with the sesame seeds and transfer the wreath to the oven to bake for about 45 minutes, or until golden and cooked through. Remove from the oven to rest for about 15 minutes before carving, serving and most importantly, devouring.


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