Month: January 2018

Benny with the good hair

Golden Globe Gold, Grammy Gold: Goldenade, Guess Who's Coming to Dinner

2018 has already felt like a marathon effort, what with me counting down to RuPaul’s Drag Race All Stars 3, my first ever Golden Globe Gold celebration, getting all up in Schitt’s Creek, honouring the 20th anniversary of Dawson’s Creek and Tyra berating slash begging me to cover America’s Next Top Model. But there is still one more mega-week to go before the Oscars.

Yas bish, it’s time for my annual Grammy Gold party.

Will this be the year my girl Carrie finally gets a major award? The answer is, obvi, James Corden better bloody hope so.

On that menacing note, welcome to this year’s triumphant Grammy Gold: Goldenade.

Who will be joining me tomorrow? Let’s just say, I have a feeling it is going to make me so emotional …

Image source: Grammys.

 

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Lisa Wilkinscone

Baking, Dessert, Snack

Where do I start with my dear friend Lisa Wilkinson? I mean, while her defection from the Today show came as a massive shock to you, the general public, it is a decision that we had been methodically planning for months. Nay, years! Well at least for me.

You see, while I am a close friend of the Today show given my friendships with Karl and Sylv, I felt that Lisa was being underutilised and slow opened her eyes to this fact. Then contract negotiations kicked off, then failed and a couple of phones calls later, she was heading to primetime on Ten … and we’d be working together in no time after she secures me a spot on one of their reality shows.

That, for both of us, is the end goal – headlining a show together. And wouldn’t it be stunning.

Lis and I first connected in the ‘80s whilst working under the same glossy umbrella before she ultimately succeeded me as the editor of Cleo when I sensationally quit to start a male version He-ho, which was going to be comprised solely of centrefolds. While it tragically never took off, Lisa admired my spirit and we became the fastest of friends.

Given she has been busy relaxing before kicking off her new job, we haven’t seen each other in the last few months. It was truly wonderful to take some time out together to reconnect, decompress and plot the quickest way she can get me from an island to co-hosting something with her.

I feel like I’m going to say too much, so let’s just say my Lisa Wilkinscone are the perfect cure to starvation.

 

 

Are they fancy? No. Are they difficult? Again, no. Are they delicious? Fuck yes. Slather them in butter and some Strawberry Plaza Jam … or Jams Mansfield, and you’re in heaven.

Enjoy!

 

 

Lisa Wilkinscone
Serves: 6.

Ingredients
3 cups flour
2 tbsp baking powder
pinch of salt
80g unsalted butter, cubed
1 ¼ cups milk
Strawberry Plaza Jam or Jams Mansfield and whipped cream, to serve

Method
Preheat oven to 180°C.

Sift the flour, baking powder and salt into a large bowl. Add the butter and rub together with your fingertips until it resembles wet sand.

Make a well in the centre, pour in the milk and using a butter knife, cut across the bowl until just combined. Turn onto a floured surface and knead until smooth, making sure not to over-work the dough.

Flatten the dough until it is roughly 2cm thick and cut into small, cookie-sized discs. Transfer to a lined baking sheet and bake for twenty minutes, or until golden and puffed. Transfer to a cooling rack for ten minutes before devouring slathered in butter, jam and cream.

 

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Maccie Cheesing

America's Next Top Model, America's Next Top Model 24, Main, Pasta

Previously on America’s Next Top Model, Tyra returned to her kingdom, now with new underlings. Did we mentioned Tyra returned, Tyra Banks, the boss, the boss Tyra Banks, is back. Well she is, and then she put the semi-finalists through their paces in interview/runway/photo shoot challenge before being whittled down to a top 14. Before that though we met Liberty the Trump supporter, old-Erin and poor Khrystyana who was yelled at by Liz for some reason. Ty-Ty then dropped the bomb that instead of a top fourteen, fifteen girls would be moving forward giving old-Erin the chance to prove herself.

(Then Tyra yelled at me and I agreed to time travel back to filming and whip up model meals for the booted girls. And now we are here, so yeah …).

We opened up looking over the majesty that is L.A. before zeroing in on the model mansion where Maggie was lamenting the fact that nobody was given best photo on the way to becoming a finalist. She reminded us she is really into cultural appropriation, which didn’t go down well with Coura and Sandra who felt she was trying to be something she felt they wanted her to be. As an aside, Sandra is by far my fave right about now.

Brendi K then opened up about her tough upbringing … leading Sandra to give her a pep talk. She is my queen.

Tyra-mail arrived – she turns up like Probst aka whenever I start to fall for a contestant – alerting the models that they would need to both chill and glide. Given she knows I’m ice skating royalty, I knew it wasn’t that since I wasn’t approached to guest. Instead, they met Stacey McKenzie at Venice Skatepark for a walking tute before being thrown straight into a runway show through the skatepark as skaters shredded around them. Is shredding a thing?

Law Roach manifested to introduce the models to the Baja East designers who flooded the shit out of my basement. They got to work dressing the models while Stacey found Ivana to give her a confidence boost, sensing she wasn’t feeling herself and her walk. As the show commenced, Stacey and Law announced that the winner of the challenge would win a spot walking for Baja East at NYFW. All the models were doing well before Brendi K went off course, Coura and Jeana dominated, and Ivana also went bush before Khrystyana took out the win … and my heart.

The models returned home where Brendi K discovered a half-eaten apple in the fridge, setting off an epic tirade at the other models given she grew up poor and doesn’t feel like people are appreciating the opportunity they’ve been given.

Tyra-mail returned with a simple, you’re glowing which it turns out translated into a pregnancy shoot. Either being knocked up was a requirement of entering the competition, or there was going to be some prosthetics before they boho-ed it up. This triggered Rhiyan who was told she may not be able to have children and Erin who felt guilty for never doing a pregnancy shoot with her children. Thankfully, they both overcame the emotions. On the flipside, Maggie struggled to get out of her head and get a good shot, and Brendi K couldn’t connect with the shoot after having a miscarriage due to an abusive ex.

At panel, Khrystyana received universal praise – aside from her kitten heels – Rhiyan shared her fertility issues before getting some middling reviews. Rio slayed, Liz was beige, Kyla struggled, Jeana served MILF-realness, Erin killed it, Liberty – despite her political views – gave great toe, Sandra failed to impress, Shanice was boring, Brendi was torn to shreds, Christina got mixed reviews, Coura was perfection albeit boring in person, Maggie was torn to shreds for having conflicting personalities and looking confusing and Ivana’s confidence was once again called into question.

As expected, the dominant Coura was given best photo with Rio nipping at her heels, leaving Brendi K and Maggie as the bottom two. Ultimately Brendi K was saved, sending my girl the white-homegirl Maggie home.

Poor Maggie was shocked and heartbroken to find herself out of the competition first, though bless her cotton socks, tried her darndest to convince everyone she was simply grateful to see them succeed. Though, maybe that could be my Maccie Cheesing talking.

 

 

Inspired by the great Goop Queen Gwyneth’s Mac and Cheese recipe, this mildly healthier version of the mac family is pure perfection. I mean, how do you go past bacon … even as a model? You can’t, now eat yo’ mac.

Enjoy!

 

 

Maccie Cheesing
Serves: 4-6.

Ingredients
500g macaroni
½ onion, diced
3 garlic cloves, minced
4 rashers bacon, diced (optional, but like … are you mad? Everything’s better with bacon)
2 cups passata
small handful basil, roughly chopped
small handful oregano, roughly chopped
250g mascarpone
a pinch of freshly grated nutmeg
2 cups grated parmesan cheese
½ cup milk
salt and pepper, to taste
¼ cup plain breadcrumbs

Method
Preheat oven to 180C and bring a large pot of salted water to boil over medium heat, cooking the macaroni a couple of minutes less than the packet instructions.

In another pan, fry the onion, garlic and bacon for a couple of minutes. Add the passata and simmer for a couple of minutes. Stir through the basil and oregano, remove from the heat and leave to rest.

In yet another pan, combine the mascarpone, nutmeg and ¾ of the parmesan over medium heat until everything just comes together, about 2 minutes. Whisk in the milk and a good whack of salt and pepper.

Drain the swap pasta and return to the pan. Add the cheese mixture and stir until well combined.

Pour the bacon-passata goodness into a baking dish, and then spread the mac and cheese over the top. Sprinkle the breadcrumbs and remaining parmesan over the top, and bake for about twenty minutes, or until golden and glorious.

Allow to rest for about five minutes before serving and devouring, like a pregnant model.

 

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Michello Williams Shots

Dawson's Creek 20th Anniversary, Dessert, Drink

After spending time with Josh, Katie, Mezza-B, JVDB and Kerr, we’ve come, just like that, to the end of my Dawson’s Creek 20th Anniversary road. Though I guess, really, I should call it a creek, no? Given said anniversary of the premiere falls today and we’re balls deep in awards season, I knew that Mich was the perfect person to act as the jewel in our crown.

Plus – Michelle Williams is a damn saint and is hella iconic, so she is most deserving. I mean, her statement post-Wahlbergate and shout out to Anthony Rapp was perfection.

While I only met Michelle on the Dawson’s set, we quickly became the best of friends and have been each other’s emotional support ever since (even if her close bond with Busy sometimes gets in the way). Fun fact: as Jake and I were engaged at the time of Matilda’s christening and I’m her secret third godparent).

Her career has truly gone from strength to strength since leaving the Creek, raking in a Golden Globe and a quartet of Oscar nominations (… that really should bump up to five after her powerhouse performance, during two different filmings, in All The Money in the World). She kinda is like the millennial version of Meryl, TBH.

Of course she laughed off my lavish praise when we set down to celebrate her role as Queen Jen Lindley and her ongoing success, but deep down I know she appreciated me toasting her with a tray of Michello Williams Shots.

 

 

Since we are both – yes, BOTH – hella classy, I didn’t want my jello shots to be a technicolour monstrosity that burnt from your esophagus right to your soul. So instead of that, I went with a dignified sparkling, berry and chambord combination which truly gives you life. Consider this the Oscar version compared to the usual Golden Globe-esque jello shot.

Enjoy!

 

 

Michello Williams Shots
Serves: 6.

Ingredients
750ml bottle of sparkling, I went with Prosecco because Sonja Morgan is my low-key role-model
6 leaves Gelatine
¼ cup raw caster sugar
1 lemon, juiced
1 shot chambord
½ cup blueberries or raspberries, rinsed and drained

Method
Cut the gelatine into the top of a double boiler, cover with the sparkling and leave to sit for fifteen minutes, or until hella soft. Fill the bottom of the double boiler with water and simmer over a medium heat until the gelatin has completely melted. Whisk in the sugar and lemon juice until the sugar has dissolved. Remove from the heat and allow to cool slightly. Pour the remaining sparkling into a bowl with the chambord and add the gelatin-sparkling mixture through a sieve.

Chuck a couple of berries in each shot glass – this could honestly fill 18-24. So just set any remaining liquid in a jelly mould or even a bowl – fill with jelly and transfer to the fridge to set for a couple of hours.

Once set, grab then out and devour, greedily.

 

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Rice Kheer Smith

Dawson's Creek 20th Anniversary, Dessert, Snack, Sweets

I bet you thought, how do you top spending time with Dawson himself – JVDB, obvi – as part of the Dawson’s Creek 20th Anniversary celebration? And not just Dawson – yes, here it comes – but Josh, Katie and Mezzy-B too. The answer, obvi, is the man that first awakened my sexuality on screen Kerr Smith.

While obviously Josh Jacks had well and truly awakened my sexuality by the time Kerr arrived on the set, the character of Jack McPhee – and him posing naked for Joey’s painting – showed me that homosexuality was a thing. And daaaaaaamn boy, paint me like one of your French girls.

Fun fact: seeing that painting scene inspired me to travel back and journey on the Titantic, lure a pleb into a romance and get him to draw me wearing only a locket. Sure he could have fit on the door with me when I was clinging to life, but I wasn’t ready to make that sort of commitment just yet. Anyway, it inspired the movie Titanic and that is why Jack didn’t get on the door.

End. Of. Story.

Anyway, we became the best of friends on set and while it never became romantic between us, his responsibility as a straight white man playing an LGBT character made him feel like he needed to support me out of the closest. He truly is, a sweetheart.

I haven’t seen Kerr in a couple of years so was pleasantly surprised when he sauntered through the arrivals AND COMPLETELY TRANSFORMED INTO A ZADDY. After fainting in his arms, I pulled myself together and got to work celebrating his masterful work as Jack and slurping up a big bowl of Rice Kheer Smith.

 

 

Is this just a gussied up rice pudding? Sure. Is it also just fucking delicious? Of course. Lightly spiced, delicately sweet and now requirement for teeth. It is, truly, perfection.

Enjoy!

 

 

Rice Kheer Smith
Serves: 4.

Ingredients
3 cups milk
½ cup rice, rinsed and drained
½ cup muscovado sugar
4 cardamom pods
¼ cup raisins
1 tsp ground cinnamon
slivered almonds, to garnish

Method
Place the milk and rice in a medium saucepan and bring to the boil. Reduce heat to low, add the cardamom pods and simmer for about 15-20 minutes, or until the rice is cooked through and the milk is starting to thicken.

Add the sugar, raisins and cinnamon, and cook until the sugar has dissolved and everything is well incorporated.

Remove the cardamom pods and serve, or refrigerate until cold. I, personally, prefer it cold … but you can devour straight away if you prefer. With almonds scattered atop, obvi.

 

As you can probably tell, we are very social but the fun isn’t only limited to celebrities! You can follow us on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest and Tumblr.

James Van Detray Bake

Baking, Dawson's Creek 20th Anniversary, Main, Poultry

After starting things off with the dreamy Josh Jackson, followed up with the liberated Katie Holmes and my dear old friend Mary Beth Peil, we’ve arrived at the owner of the Creek. Yep – today is all about Dawth-son, my boy JVDB.

As you know – since this isn’t his first time on my patch of cyber-space – JVDB and I were lovers and then the best of friends. And most importantly, he is the reason I am married. Well technically it is thanks to the words of Fauxy on the series finale of Dawson’s Creek … but he made me watch it and as such, gets the points.

Given we’ve only recently caught up on the record – we have a monthly date and it is seminal to my happiness … this time, my meaning of seminal flies – I was surprised that he was able to make the trip down under. But I guess, how could you say no to honouring the 20th anniversary of the greatest role of your career?

JVDB has been hella busy of late, so was thrilled to be able to take some time to honour his work, while enjoying some R&R. Plus – I promised to cook up his second favourite food, my James Van Detray Bake.

 

 

Inspired by Nigella’s tray bake in Nigellissima, this little number – and I hate to say it – is even better than the OG. I mean, how do you go wrong with the addition of chilli and garlic?

Enjoy!

 

 

James Van Detray Bake
Serves: 4-6.

Ingredients
4 washed potatoes, cut into chunks
8 garlic cloves, peeled
1 punnet cherry tomatoes
6 sprigs of rosemary
6 few sprigs of thyme
small handful of sage, roughly chopped
1 lemon, juiced and zested
1 tbsp chilli flakes
10 chicken thighs, bone in
8 Italian sausages
olive oil
salt and pepper, to taste

Method
Preheat the oven to 200°C.

Chuck the potatoes, garlic, tomatoes, rosemary, thyme, sage, lemon juice and zest and chilli in a large baking dish and toss together. Add the thighs and sausages, pushing them into holes, burying some and leaving others all exposed.

Drizzle with a good lug of olive oil, season generously and transfer to the oven to bake for about an hour, checking after 45 minutes to avoid burning the meat.

Once cooked through, remove from the oven and allow to stand for about ten minutes before serving. And in turn, devouring.

 

As you can probably tell, we are very social but the fun isn’t only limited to celebrities! You can follow us on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest and Tumblr.

Wanna be on top?

America's Next Top Model, America's Next Top Model 24, Guess Who's Coming to Dinner

Shit Ben says to his dates for $2000, Alex?

*Pause for applause, laughter and hushed can-you-believe-he-said-its*

After much deliberation and a verbal beat-down from my girl Ty-Ty, I have agreed to use my powers of time-travel for good and head back to the filming of ANTM cycle 24 to sooth the pain of failing at panel.

Join me Saturday – but usually Friday – as I whip up a model-meal for the first one bumped …

Image source: VH1.

 

As you can probably tell, we are very social but the fun isn’t only limited to celebrities! You can follow us on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest and Tumblr.

Candied Mary Beth Peel

Dawson's Creek 20th Anniversary, Dessert, Snack, Sweets

I can’t believe that I’m already at the halfway point of my Dawson’s Creek anniversary celebration. While that makes me a feel a little bit misty after seeing dreamy Josh and healing with Katie, my girl Mary Beth Peil is the perfect person to elevate my spirits.

I mean, there is a reason she is the only member of the adult cast to get an invite.

Despite having an extensive career on Broad-way, I didn’t meet the divine Mezzy B until she appeared in Reckless with my girl Mia Farrow. Our bond was instantaneous, and we’ve been the best of friends ever since. When they were struggling to cats the role of Grams, I knew that she was the only one worthy of the role.

Mez has been super busy with the one-two punch of Anastasia and Les Liaisons Dangereuses, so it was wonderful that she could take some time out to celebrate her work as the moral compass and heart of Capeside.

Given we’re both old as fuck at heart, I knew that only my Candied Mary Beth Peel would suffice.

 

 

Full disclosure, I hate oranges. And peel. I mean, peel ruins hot cross buns and Christmas cake … but in this form, it sings. Soft and sweet, the peel almost becomes nature’s jube. And who doesn’t love a jube?

Enjoy!

 

 

Candied Mary Beth Peel
Serves: 2 dear, sweet friends.

Ingredients
2 large oranges, top and tailed
1 ½ cups raw caster sugar
1 cups water

Method
Cut each orange into 4 wedges and remove the flesh and pith. Scrape any excess pith from the inside and cut each into long, ½ cm strips. Place the peel in a saucepan of water and bring to the boil. Reduce heat to low and simmer for fifteen minutes before draining and rinsing thoroughly.

Bring a cup of sugar and the water to boil in a saucepan over medium heat. When rollicking, add the peel, reduce heat to low and simmer for an hour, or until nice and soft. Drain.

Toss the drained peel through the remaining sugar to coat and transfer to a wire rack to dry completely – this can take a day or so. Then, obviously, devour … if you managed to wait.

 

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Katie Holmades

Dawson's Creek 20th Anniversary, Party Food, Side, Snack, Tapas, Vegetarian

After kicking our celebration of Dawson’s Creek’s 20th anniversary with my dear friend Joshua Jackson, aka the erstwhile Pacey Witter, I knew I had to follow-up with a date with Pacey’s endgame *spoiler alert from fifteen years ago* Katie Holmes.

While Katie and I have had our ups and downs throughout the years, her finally emancipating herself – with Suri’s help, obviously – from Tom Cruise reaffirmed our bond. Fun fact: I was one of the few people to know about her relationship with Jamie Foxx.

Don’t get it twisted though, our relationship started out extremely strong on the set of the Creek. She was just starting out and my boy Ang called me after directing her in The Ice Storm to see if I would teach her the ways of TV and mentor her career.

Another fun fact: I taught her the importance of an asymmetrical smile.

Given how busy I am, Katie and I haven’t been able to hang out as often as we’d like so she was thrilled to accept my invitation. Plus it is a new year so both of us are feeling the crappy mantras about new us-es and decided it was time to deal with any and all of our leftover Cruise-related issues.

He most definitely wasn’t an ex of mine or anything and we didn’t have any Scientological related issues, obvi. Because neither of those things would ever happen. Ever. Right?

It was an emotional catch-up, honouring her greatest work, working through our feelings and devouring a big batch of Katie Holmades.

 

 

Full disclosure, I’m not a huge fan of dolmades but Katie loves them AND these ones are good enough to win me over. Spicy and packed full of a herby, lemon punch, they are the perfect snack for working through trauma whilst celebrating milestones.

Enjoy!

 

 

Katie Holmades
Serves: 12.

Ingredients
½ cup long-grain rice, rinsed
1 tsp ground allspice
1 tsp dried chilli flakes
½ tsp cumin
small handful oregano, roughly chopped
small handful mint, roughly chopped
small handful parsley, roughly chopped
2 tomatoes, roughly chopped
3 garlic cloves, minced
2 lemons, zested and juiced
100g feta, mashed
40 vine leaves
½ cup olive oil

Method
Cook the rice in boiling salted water for about ten minutes, or until almost cooked. Drain and rinse under cold water to stop the cooking and leave to drain and cool for about ten minutes.

Transfer the rice to a medium bowl and add the spices, herbs, tomatoes, garlic, lemon zest and feta in a bowl, stirring well to combine.

To assemble, place 2 heaped teaspoons of rice mixture in centre of a leaf, fold in the sides and roll to close. Place upright in a saucepan and repeat the process until all done and the dolmades are tightly packed.

Combine the lemon juice with the olive oil, pour over the dolmades and cook over low heat for an hour, or until leaves are tender. Cool to room temperature before transferring them to the fridge to chill completely overnight.

Devour cold, greedily. Preferably as part of a Abi-Maria GoMezze Plate, Nick Iadanzipasto Platter or a Charcucirie Fields Board.

 

As you can probably tell, we are very social but the fun isn’t only limited to celebrities! You can follow us on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest and Tumblr.