Chickemily Flippenne in Parmesan Cream Sauce

Main, Pasta, Poultry, Survivor, Survivor 45, TV, TV Recap

Previously on Survivor Austin handed his idol off to Julie ahead of a team immunity challenge, unsure what weird variation of tribal council could screw his ally out of the game. Thankfully it was all for nought as Jeff opted against too much chaos, allowing the Rebas to take control of the tribe. After Emily jagged a reward and took the ladies for an overnight vacay, they locked in a plan to blindside Bruce should he not win immunity. The only catch being his pesky idol. As such, they got to work convincing him he was safe and that Mama J – aka Julie – was the true target as she was such a massive threat to win. After Austin took out immunity, Emily worked overtime on Bruce to the point I wasn’t actually sure what the plan was until everyone banded together and blindsided Bruce with an idol in his pocket.

Back at camp the tribe were thrilled to have pulled off an epic blindside. None more so than Katurah, who was giddy to have finally felled her lecturing, micro-managing nemesis. Julie meanwhile was shocked that she was the one he voted for, given ironically, she was the only one willing to work with him. Emily jumped in to provide context, pointing out she went to Bruce and told him that Julie was playing him and that she was happy to join him to blindside her to protect him, which is the actual reason he never played his idol. And while everyone was shocked and excited to hear how detailed her plan was, Julie grew wary of just how threatening Emily could prove to be.

After everyone went to sleep, the Reba 4 caught up by the shore, congratulating each other for officially taking control before promptly locking in an official final four. Julie and Drew then went back to camp, leaving Austin and Dee to flirt and be all cute as they watched the stars and yeah, I ship them. As they likened themselves to Boston Rob and Amber (kinda), and ugh, I love love. But given they vowed to take each other to the final three, you know someone random is winning the final immunity challenge and they will be the duo facing off in fire for the final spot. Mark. My. Words.

The next day Jake continued to feel left out, hoping that the seven votes he has received thus far will be it for the game. Meaning he will be a zero vote finalist. Mark those words too. He and Katurah caught up, locking in an alliance to go to the end, no doubt because Katurah can already tell that he wouldn’t get votes at the end. Jake opened up about being a lawyer, encouraging Katurah and telling her she could be a lawyer herself, if she wanted. After Julie joined them, Katurah felt compelled to share her story and while she didn’t admit to being a lawyer, she spoke about her harrowing childhood, being pulled out of school at 10 after her family joined a cult and that she missed years, before her mum pulled them out of the cult when she was earmarked as the leaders next wife. And then she worked her arse off to catch up and continued to thrive until she achieved her dreams to fight for other black women.

And yeah, you know I am rooting hard for Katurah now.

A boat then arrived at camp offering a journey for one, with everyone wanting to go, meaning they had to draw rocks. With Emily, the most reluctant, the one to win the trip. As she departed, Julie and Drew spoke about Emily slowly building her resume and being a threat. Julie then suggested that maybe now would be the time to get rid of her, which Drew quickly shut down. Making Julie nervous as she noticed him getting more and more suspicious. Julie and Dee caught up, with the latter agreeing that Drew is the one she is most suspicious of. Particularly since he is close with Emily, and they just can’t trust that she will tell the truth about what happens on her journey.

Speaking of which, Emily arrived at Journey Island where she wandered the shore and discovered the ring puzzle that four people failed at earlier this season. However she was too scared about not having her vote at seven, so bounced, despite knowing everyone would be back at camp talking about targeting her.

Katurah and Jake were busy practising fire with Drew, who wanted to know who they would be willing to go to the end with. And while they were coy, Katurah agreed that she just doesn’t think she could beat Julie or Dee. Leading to Drew, eventually, getting them to agree that getting rid of Julie should be their absolute priority. Katurah then wandered off and caught up with Austin, pointing out that she isn’t really sure who she wants to go to the end with, but she does already know who she doesn’t want to go with: Julie. With Austin quickly and calmly agreeing that she is right, particularly since she wanted to get Julie out, followed by Emily. Not his girlfriend. Austin then caught up with Drew to see what he was thinking, with Drew working hard to convince him that getting rid of Julie should be the priority, given she isn’t even willing to return his idol.

Emily returned to camp, talking everyone through the experience in full, honest detail. Which obviously meant Dee and Julie didn’t buy it. Emily went for a walk, with Drew following to let her know that Julie is well and truly out to get her. Leaving the duo to go person to person to rally the troops against each other. 

Jeffrey finally made an appearance for this week’s immunity challenge where they would have to unravel rope that they would be tethered to, then race through a series of obstacles, toss sandbags at blocks and then use the blocks to solve a rainbow puzzle. Oh and the winner would get an epic BBQ reward for them back at camp. Jake was first to make a start before quickly realising he didn’t have enough rope, allowing Drew to power ahead as the rest of the tribe struggled. Austin closed the gap and it became a battle as the boys tried to figure out the puzzle. With Drew eventually figuring out how to make it work on both sides, handing himself immunity. As he channelled Michelle and kicked shit, just for funsies. You know Probst then offered Drew the chance to share his BBQ with someone, opting to take Jake given they haven’t had a reward. And then Austin, to keep guys’ night alive.

Back at camp the girls went off to luxuriate in the ocean and read up on the history of buffs, given they are all planning to target either Julie and Emily. Eventually Dee suggested they vote out Jake just to make things less awkward. We then caught up with the boys who were smashing their burgies and TBH, it truly did look lovely. They then debated the merits of getting rid of Julie or Emily and while Jake didn’t exactly trust anyone, he did trust that they needed him this round and as such, happily jumped on board the Julie vote. Agreeing to keep Dee out of the loop as long as possible to reduce the chances of her playing the idol.

They came back together where the guilt started to play on Austin as he worried about telling Dee. As such, they went for a walk together along the shore with Dee sharing she is locked to get rid of Emily, before Austin casually, awkwardly, shared that there is currently a growing movement against Julie. Which Dee obviously hated, though she tried to hide it, given she didn’t want her emotions getting the best of her. After thinking on it, she figured trusting her heart has proven successful thus far, so caught up with Julie at the shelter and told her to play her idol tonight. Julie then caught up with Jake and Emily to suggest the plan was one of the girls, though she would happily make a move against Austin if they wanted. After Julie went for a walk, Emily told Julie that she is trying to rally the troops against Austin, which resulted in all of them descending into chaos. As Drew and Austin bickered about whether Dee spilled the beans and Dee tried to talk Julie out of targeting Austin and to stick to the plan to blindside Emily.

At tribal council Drew and Julie spoke about how the game gets easy as it goes along, given everyone becomes more and more desensitised to blindsiding people. Katurah spoke about the fact you need to successfully compartmentalise, while Emily pointed out that everyone has full bags with them tonight as nobody can trust they will be safe. Drew tried to be cagey before unleashing about how they are in a new page of history, a wanky way of saying they are thinking who they want to face off against in the final three. Julie and Emily spoke about how they have tried to steel their emotions as they planned to vote out someone they love, with Austin agreeing it has come to the point of having to simply figure out who’s motives align with yours. While Katurah admitted she was scared about the chance of an idol, given everyone played their cards so close to their chest.

With that the tribe voted as everyone – including Dee, as per the plan – voted for Julie, before she played Austin’s gifted idol in a very showy move, sending Emily out of the game with a single, solitary vote. Emily found her way to Ponderosa by following my screaming tears, before pulling me in for a massive hug and assuring me she would be fine. Sadly for her, it didn’t pacify me, as I screamed that I would not be. After 40 minutes of heaving sobs though, I finally realised I will be fine because Emily is one of the breakout stars of the new era and as such, will return multiple times over the years and will likely win on her second outing. And until then, we’ll always have Chickemily Flippenne in Parmesan Cream Sauce.

This is one of those perfect soothing dishes for the end of the year when we’re all limping to a break. Rich and creamy, with a sweet punch of tomato, this all works in harmony to fill your stomach and warm hearts. Just like Emily throughout the season.

Enjoy!

Chickemily Flippenne in Parmesan Cream Sauce
Serves: 6.

Ingredients
500g penne
1 tbsp olive oil
2 chicken breasts, diced
1 cup button mushrooms, thinly sliced
4 garlic cloves, minced
1 cup sundried tomatoes, drained and roughly chopped
1 tsp Italian seasoning
1 tbsp unsalted butter
1 tbsp flour
2 cups cream
1 cup parmesan cheese, grated
2 cups baby spinach, washed
salt and pepper, to taste

Method
Bring a pot of salted water to the boil and cook the pasta per the cooking instructions, minus a minute. Drain, run under cool water and to rest.

Heat the olive oil in a large skillet over medium heat and cook the chicken, stirring, for five minutes or so, or until cooked through. Add the mushrooms, garlic, sundried tomato and Italian seasoning, cooking until fragrant and the mushrooms are soft. Add the butter and flour and cook for a further couple of minutes before stirring in the cream. Bring to a near-boil, reduce to low and stir in the parmesan until smooth. Finally stir in the baby spinach and cook until wilted. Remove from the heat.

Once the pasta is ready, stir through the sauce, season and serve. Then add a little more parmesan and devour, like a boss. Ideally with a glass of confessional wine.


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Chicken & Mushroom Amylfredo

Main, Pasta, Poultry, RuPaul’s Drag Race Down Under, RuPaul’s Drag Race Down Under 3, TV, TV Recap

Previously on Drag Race Down Under the producers once again proved that what we lack in budget in the land(s) down under, we make up for in sheer camp and fun. I mean, where else do you hear so many ockerisms and smut from the judges alone. One by one the dolls were felled and once again, Team Kiwi came out on top as CUM! and chippies combined to hand a very well deserved victory to Spankie mother tuckin’ Jackzon as she succeeded the host of her first televised drag competition victory, Kita Mean.

Never forget Kita spreading rumours she was the first boot. What an icon.

But that was then and this is now, as first up to enter our tight little Werk Room this year was Hollywould Star and I love her confidence, despite only being on the scene for a year. Plus her red dress was cute. Ashley Madison dropped by looking perfect in pastel, despite her lack of arse and controversial nature down in Melbourne. Pronounced Mal-bourne, if you’re a local FYI. While Ashley has the reputation as the local bitch, she heard that’s what the dolls in Sydney think of Hollywould, so hopes to see if she is. Or you know, is trying to Alexis Michelle her way out of the villain role and push it on to Hollywould. The first potential winner – aka Kiwi – is Flor, who was living her best life serving all glamour, until a fly flew into her eye, because this, of course, happens in down under. Ivory Glaze arrived serving sleeping beauty on arrival and nerd in confessional, so you know I will ship. Even though winner may get her fired by Ashley, her number one booker.

But well, Ashley couldn’t keep her pants up, so maybe her approval doesn’t really matter.

Feeling the vibe, Amyl was an absolute mess forgetting her name, age and entrance line, so if she doesn’t win, I am absolutely going to lose it. Plus, her entry line was perfection (“Loosen up assholes, Amyl’s here”). Anita’s husband was up next and well, I look forward to Ivanna Drink and her sweet nature. Isis Avis Loren joined the frey and I love her already, because in drag she is sickening but out, she is an artsy nerd and I love me a transformation. Rita Menu was next in, serving silly charm and ugh, give her the crown. She is like the kid from Hunt for the Wilderpeople grown up and therefore must be protected at all costs. We then met Bumpa Love, who is a fucking icon like Gamble from RHOM and while she was living for herself, the little girls were loving her delusion. And then Gabriella Labucci rounded out the cast, arriving in crotchet, dropping farts and I love her and her flaccid dickhead ways.

Her quote.

Ru dropped by to welcome her newest shielas and list out the prize package before forgoing any mini challenge and announcing for their first maxi challenge, they would be throwing a Madi Gras float performance, featuring their own verses on a mash up Superqueen and Sissy that Walk. And because of the budget, one would assume, they would have to arrange their own choreo.

With that, the dolls split up to untuck and kiki, with Flor and Isis speculating who would prove to be their biggest competition. While they felt Rita is likely to be the first one heading out the door, given she hasn’t been doing drag for very long. Hollywould and Amyl meanwhile were excited to not be the solo women of colour, speculating that Flor could be the trade of the season. If she ever took off her mug for them to confirm, that is. 

Everyone split up to work through their lyrics, with Ivory confident in her skills as a songwriter. Sadly for her, Flor and Hollywould weren’t feeling her kind, uplifting words, instead cautioning her to mak sure she lets Ru know who she is with her verse. Hollywould meanwhile was focused all on herself, though thankfully sharing her lyrics lit a fire under Ivory. Rita meanwhile was focused on talking food and serving, while Ashley started to get into her head. Gabriella meanwhile opted to walk around and check in with her besties – lucky she gave out those friendship bracelets on arrival – though sadly just made Ivory more nervous.

The dolls pivoted to the mainstage to work through their choreography with nobody willing to stick their necks out so soon. As such, Ivanna bravely stepped up to lead them, however given Amyl isn’t a confident dancer and Ivory doesn’t know what a boxstep is, it could be a problem. She didn’t have to worry for long though, given Flor and Isis weren’t thrilled by the direction of the choreo, so the latter stepped in like traffic control and directed them all around the stage. Which only made things worse for Amyl and Ivory, while sweet Gabriella was just confused. For no specific reason, like an icon.

Backstage Ivory continued to spiral, breaking down in tears as she wondered why she even thought it was a good idea to apply. Thankfully Isis stepped up to give her a peptalk, encouraging her to take this opportunity to shine. Ivory opened up about her difficult relationship with her parents and how she has always felt the need to be perfect. And even when she was, was made to feel like she should be doing even more.

Elimination Day arrived with Amyl feeling very stressed about her debut performance, while Ivory opened up to the rest of the girls about how their feedback on her lyrics got into her head and as such, she spiraled. And while Hollywould was annoyed she couldn’t see it as constructive, the rest of the dolls were far more supportive. As they split up to beat their mugs, Hollywould and Flor kikied about how they were only trying to help and gave Ivory deathies across the room. Thankfully before a fight could break out, Isis asked who had experienced mardi gras which led to a nice chat about the power of pride and how wonderful it is. Despite the lack of safe spaces being equally located around the country, as Ashley Madison further leant into playing the role of the Alexis Michelle of the season.

Gabriella meanwhile was genuinely being a sweet icon, pulling Ivory aside to make sure things were good between them as she was only trying to be helpful about her verse and would hate to have hurt her feelings in the process. While Flor and Hollywould moved on from the deathies, instead joking about Ivory being in the bottom.

Ru, Michelle and Rhys were joined on the panel by Deva Mahal as the dolls turned the show and well, it was good. Real good. Hollywould was absolute fire, Garbeilla was camp and cute, Flor was on point and Isis was perfect because I love her. At the other end of the pack, poor Amyl was very obviously stuck in her head, Ashley’s outfit looked a couple of sizes too big and Ivory couldn’t find the beat or her own lyrics. 

On the Somewhere Under the Rainbow runway, Isis served a moody, floral butterfly. Ivanna looked like Weird Barbie rocking shimmering disco dots, Amyl gave a tube of lifesavers, Ashley gave Vivienne Westwood tartan, though still couldn’t get an outfit to fit. Rita meanwhile gave gay flag gyro, Bumpa was stunningly feathered and ugh, I wish we saw more of her this episode as she is fun. I mean, the waving and banter with the judges as she walked was just A+. Garbriella gave another lifesaver gown though made it glamour and won the battle, Ivory Glaze gave LBD covered in unicorn cum – who can beat that description? – while Hollywould Star served glamour Black Panther and yeah, she came to slay. As did Flor, giving bright, architectural bug and well, this is clearly why the dolls were confident backstage.

Isis, Ivanna, Rita and Bumpa were sent to safety before Amyl was read for being completely stuck in her head and unable to loosen up, ironically. Ru encouraged her to just believe in herself and feel like the star that she is. Ashley meanwhile was read for the ill fitting garments, though praised for her confidence. Gabriella meanwhile was lavished in praise for being charming, energetic and fun, despite her performance look being a little basic. Ivory meanwhile was read for struggling in the performance – BADLY – though they rightly lived for her stunning runway, which may just save her. She opened up to Ru about being a business analyst and that she doesn’t really believe in herself, though drag is what makes her feel extraordinary. Hollywould meanwhile received wall to wall praise for the performance and the runway. As did Flor, despite the fact they wanted to see her face.

Thankfully though, she did fully beat under her mask and that reveal absolutely delighted them.

Backstage the safe girls were just thrilled to survive the first week before Amyl arrived and immediately started hunting for an iPod to learn the lip sync. And was heartbroken. Ivory meanwhile was disappointed but ready to lip sync, knowing it was inevitable. Ashley meanwhile was busy sobbing about her fucking nipples landing her in the bottom. While Amyl admitted she would just prefer to lip sync against Ashley because she likes Ivory better, so doesn’t want to send her home. Which, lol.

Ultimately Gabriella and Flor were sent to safety as Hollywould took out the first victory of the season. At the other end of the pack, Amyl tragically didn’t get her wish as Ashley narrowly avoided the lip sync – by a nipple, one could say. As soon as Men at Work’s Down Under kicked off, Ivory and Amyl gave the same choreo and energy, but TBH, what else can you do with that song other than some air percussion and jigging. Actually, maybe they could have done some Kath and Kim Irish dancing? In any event, while it was a bit boring, Ru didn’t go the route of Valentina and keep them both – for reasons still unknown, Mexico – instead, rewarding Ivory for giving a little bit camp and polish, tragically leaving Amyl as the Jojo Zaho of the season.

Despite the disappointment, Amyl was in good spirits backstage as I pulled her in for a massive hug and reiterated that even if she didn’t get the memorable place of first boot, her entry would have already made her a beloved, cult queen. And since she has both, that makes her destined for great things, if you ask me! Back to feeling her iconic oats, we turned our attention to celebrating her brief run, plotting her ru-demption on All Stars and smashing a batch of Chicken & Mushroom Amylfredo.

There is nothing I love more than a rich, creamy sauce. Even more so when it is combined with my second favourite meat – chicken, as I’m basic – and pasta. Throw in some woody mushrooms and well, you’ve got the ultimate in comfort food.

Enjoy!

Chicken & Mushroom Amylfredo
Serves: 6.

Ingredients
500g penne
1 tsp olive oil
500g button mushrooms, sliced
500g chicken breast, sliced
kosher salt and pepper, to taste
500g thickened cream
115g unsalted Butter
75g parmesan cheese, grated
4 garlic cloves, minced
1 cup baby spinach, washed

Method
Cook the penne per packet instructions, because girl, I have no idea where to start making penne from scratch. But that is an aside.

Heat the oil in a pan over medium heat and saute the mushrooms for 5 minutes or so, or until browned and crisp. Add the chicken and cook, stirring, for another 5 minutes before seasoning with a good whack of salt and pepper. Reduce heat to low and stir in the cream, butter, garlic and parmesan, and cook until smooth, before stirring in the spinach. Remove from heat.

Combine the pasta and the sauce, season to taste and then devour, thinking wistfully of what could have been.


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Pizza Puttaneskahena au Poulet

Drag Race France, Drag Race France 1, Main, Pizza, TV, TV Recap

The lights came up on the City of Light – well, I assume, I was just whisked from CDG to set, so I’m not 100% sure – as Nicky Doll narrated the triumphant opening of Drag Race France. And well, Nicky is iconic, she is the moment and gurl, she is truly the Ru of Drag Race France. I mean, she even has her own headshots all over the Werk Room! Speaking of the Werk Room, Kam Hugh was the first one to make her debut giving Aquaria and Veronica Green’s love child, but with Farrah’s general vibe. She was joined by La Big Bertha who could have me any way she wants out of drag, serving sexy bearded queen, dripping in raclette and ugh, crown her now. Because I am crowning. Whatever that may mean. They were quickly joined by Elips giving full old school glamour with the fun of Grey Gardens, so obviously I stan.

Though sidebar, I don’t actually think the Edie’s were living their best lives, were they?

Lolita Banana made a loud and proud entry and well, I love her already. And her skills at deepthroating a banana and showing all her man chest in confessionals. So yeah, my basement is flooded. Despite Bertha feeling she was giving off dachshund vibes. Soa de Muse arrived and was giving me Tayce vibes, in all the right ways. And well, she can sit on my face. Alongside Bertha. Le Grande Dame was up next serving beaded sex and well, I live. As much as she was living for herself during her entry. They were joined by Lova Ladiva who arrived giving Stacy Layne Matthews and Porkchop’s love child, so obviously she is destined to vamp her way into icon status in a matter of minutes.

THEN LA KAHENA ARRIVED AND LITERALLY LIT HER HAND ON FIRE and well, this is the energy I need in my life. She also looked like a beautiful gladiator, so yeah, I love. La Briochée arrived giving camp, cakey delight and well, I live for everything she is bringing, like a love child of BenDeLaCreme and Blair St Clair. Rounding out the cast is the iconic Paloma giving red hot, demon sexpot and well, I am ready for the dolls to turn it out because this cast looks strong.

A cock crowed – yes – announcing the arrival of Nicky Doll to officially welcome them to the competition and announce they’re competing for 40,000 Euros, a holiday courtesy of Tinder and make-up from Mac. Which is pretty iconic, TBH. As is the hunky Pit Crew who joined her, decked in navy and white striped speedos and berets, so yeah, my basement is flooded ten times over. 

Oh and the zaddies would also be joining the dolls for their first mini challenge, a photoshoot celebrating all things France. Soa was up first and gave full glamour and face while cycling through all the emotions as Nicky kicked out the pit crew and replaced them with cancan girls. Briochée was cute and camp, Kahena was wild, Paloma stayed focused on a killer shot, Grande Dame was fun, Lolita was stupid in all the right ways and Elips was adorable. Bertha lived her best life with both the boys and the girls, while Kam gave full Farrah while Lova was just a delight. Ultimately though there could only be one winner, with Lolita splitting her way to the front of the pack and gurl, I live for her confidence. 

Barely having time to recover, Nicky wheeled out the Pit Crew to give her her prize before announcing that their first Maxi Challenge would be a cheeky little Talent Show followed by a Jean Paul Gaultier runway, in front of Jean Paul himself. And well, fuck, that’s a gag. Everyone split up to untuck and claim a space in the Werk Room with Bertha opening up about being insecure about her body in the past and how drag gave her the confidence to take on the world. And again, she can sit on my face. Briochée and Lova bonded with their fellow big queen, given they felt they had similar journeys growing up. La Kahena followed suit and opened up about drag saving her life, giving her and outlet and freeing her from the oppression she has felt from her culture.

We quickly ventured to the mainstage where Nicky was joined by Daphné Bürki, Kiddy Smile, Iris Mittenaere and Jean Paul Gaultier – I’m still shocked – as Lolita opened up the Talent Show with a feisty salsa, complete with wig reveals splits and a sexy zaddy dance partner who easily gives her an extra point. Kam Hugh did a ridiculous banana peel strip before singing a sexy song about how it should be done and well, it was like a less fun version of Blu’s talent show. But I love it all the same. Briochée straight up belted out a song like the second coming of Edith Piaf and it was iconic. Paloma did a little skit about being a hippy and I love it despite it making no sense, because it was ridiculous. La Grande Dame gave sexy golden robot as she lip synced – perfectly – to an original song. And then played the saxophone. No joke. With a champagne flute attached to her head, no less.

Elips slayed a moody lip sync number as she stripped from camo to a flaming bodysuit before Soa stole the damn show with a moody song and well, she is an absolute icon. She hit every note, was camp and delightful and oh so moody and well, I live. I mean, it was like John Leguiziamo in Moulin Rouge! Lova gave an inspirational speech and frustrated her sisters while La Kahena gave a camp, absurd skit and delighted the hell out of everyone followed by lighting her hand on fire again before Bertha shut it down giving a camp little strip, serving comedy and acting, and well, I love it and the pasties flipping the bird and the bare arse.

On the Liberté, Égalité, Jean Paul Gaultier runway La Briochée gave Dita Von Teese butterfly corset in all the right ways and looked like an absolute star. Lolita went with the iconic conical bra, complete with taps dripping in diamond underneath. Lova was perfection in honour of the perfume bottles, Soa gave a conical corset covered in braids and yeah, she looked absolutely perfect. Bertha gave furry conical titties, La Kahena was stunning in a nude gown with red hands around the bodice, Paloma gave biblical realness as a living Madonna before Kam Hugh served icy mint architecture and was absolutely stunning. Elips gave cabaret conical realness made of ties, while La Grande Dame was perfect in a white harnessed look, complete with a keyhole over the butt.

La Briochée, Lolita, La Grande Dame and Paloma were sent to safety before Lova was read for not giving talent, despite being so vulnerable with everyone. Though the judges agreed that they all lived for her runway. Soa received universal praise for everything she served this week, giving camp, stunning looks and absolutely destroyed the talent show. Bertha too was universally beloved, letting them know exactly who she is and for being so damn polished. La Kahena was encouraged to let go and stop being hard on herself because they could tell she was nervous. All the time. Kam’s looks were adored, though her talent show was read for being basic. While they all lived for Elips’ magnetism.

Backstage the safe girls toasted to making it another week, before the tops and bottoms joined them to kiki. Elips opened up about being overwhelmed by the judges liking her, while Lova admitted she kind of just wanted to hide after receiving her critiques. Kahena was just confused, while Kam was simply disappointed in herself. Though bless Briochée, she did give them a sweet little pep talk!

Ultimately Soa took out the first win of the franchise, while Bertha and Elips were sent to safety, with Kam narrowly joining them, leaving La Kahena and Lova to lip sync for their lives. To French Canadian icon Céline Dion’s Prière Païenne and well, it was a show. Though maybe that is because I live for Céline. Kahena was camp while Lova was giving all the emotion and hit every lyric. While Kahena had fire and fought valiantly, wearing a gown kinda felt like it held her back a little, as she couldn’t get into it as much as Lova and as such, she found herself immortalised as the iconic Porkchop of Drag Race France.

Which honestly is the best place to finish if you aren’t going to win any damn season. Which is exactly what I told her as she returned to the Werk Room. I pulled her in for a massive hug and reminded her how well she truly performed, despite her apparent nerves. Thankfully she wasn’t too hard on herself, taking the loss on her chin and proud to join the international collective of iconic first franchise boots as we smashed a piping hot Pizza Puttaneskahena au Poulet.

As hot as the fire that she lit on her hand, this chicken puttanesca pizza is breathtaking and iconic. Salty capers and olives pair perfectly with the sweetness of the chicken that by the time you add in the heat, you’re in heaven.

Enjoy! 

Pizza Puttaneskahena au Poulet
Serves: 2-4.

Ingredients
1 base as per Pizsa Zsa Gabor
⅓ cup passata
oregano and basil, roughly chopped, to taste
1 tbsp capers
2 tsp chilli flakes
¼ cup black olives, sliced
4-5 button mushrooms, sliced
¾ cup rotisserie chicken, shredded
mozzarella, to taste

Method
Prep the bases as per Zsa Zsa’s instructions preheat the oven to 180°C.

Smear passata over the prepared base and sprinkle with the herbs, capers, chilli, olives and mushrooms, before blanketing – I mean, you don’t have to but who wouldn’t – in mozzarella.

Transfer to the oven and bake for twenty minutes, or until bubbly and golden. Serve immediately and devour, careful not to burn your mouth on the piping hot cheese.


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Mitchroom Shawiss Burger

Australian Survivor, Australian Survivor: Brains V Brawn, Burgers, Main, Street Food, TV, TV Recap

Previously on Australian Survivor poor George was still left right out despite a string of hero moments in the last couple of immunity challenges. Though thankfully for him, he did manage to find a hidden immunity idol despite Baden finding the clue hidden away at camp. At the immunity challenge Benny became the bane of everyone’s existence due to moving letters – which were incorrect anyway, as an aside – and as such, Simon quickly turned everyone against him. After Big D flipped to the other side in the first round, Shannon and Queen Kez joined their rivals to boot Benny from the game.

We kicked things off at the Brawn tribe where the group were living their best lives as Gerald served his sexiest model poses. All while Simon looked on, heartbroken that he is no longer the zaddy of the tribe. While Gerald was feeling irritated that Shannon flipped the night before, he assured us that he was still loyal to his majority alliance and as such, just wanted Simon to chill out with the grumps and keep things as jovial as possible. That being said, Gerald was also committed to keeping an eye on Simon, given he is clearly on the hunt for an idol and as such, the majority can’t afford to let him get it. Sadly for Simon, as soon as he spotted the idol he was under the watchful eyes of Flick and Kez, so he couldn’t make a grab for it yet. 

Though mere moments later, fate clearly intervened as they left and he returned to the tree where it was hidden, grabbed it and was buoyed by hope.

Over at camp Brains, Joey was thrilled to hit double digits though was desperate to score a reward for their tribe given he is so overwhelmed by hunger. That being said, he is sitting pretty in the tribe and doesn’t have to worry about getting the boot and as such, he assured us that he can persevere. We then learnt he works in finance, but that means nothing because he planned to go to the next challenge in drag, wearing his buff as a top and as such, my basement is flooded and I’m questioning everything I know.

The tribes met up with my love Jonathan for the reward challenge which would see them log-roll for a bountiful feast of toasties. Which immediately had the Brains dripping, but hopefully that translates to dripping back at camp as they jaff things up. First to face off were Flick and Hayley with the latter once again defeating a professional athlete in a challenge to give the Brains a lead. Sadly that was it for Brains domination as Emmett destroyed Andrew – who ended up cracking his nads on the log on the way out before Simon straight up challenged Joey to the next round and quickly destroyed him. That left Dani to defeat Cara for the win, which she did though not because she tried to scare her off the log Scooby Doo style.

Back at the Brawns camp the tribe were thrilled to see their newest loot and giddy to get down to whipping up their sandie jays. None were happier than Simon though, given he was sitting pretty with an idol AND then found a second one in their reward as he collected hessian sacks that he could use for fishing. He was confident nobody saw him and returned to camp to smugly eat the sandwich as King Gerald shared with us that he saw the entire thing play out. The rest of the tribe meanwhile fried up their toasties while Daini worried whether he should feel bad for the Brains, rather than protesting a lockdown and making the COVID situation worse.

Speaking of the Brains, George and Cara were bonding over their upbeat vibes while Baden grew tired of being hungry. And you know, the fact that he couldn’t find the idol he has a clue for since he is currently riding solo just like George. If only the duo put their differences aside, aligned and got to work taking over the game. And reading my mind, George decided now was the time to check in with Baden and as such, caught up with him by the billabong to see how he was feeling. As they cracked it out doing yoga, George shared that he had found the idol without a clue and while Baden was glad to be put out of his misery, he was more grateful that George shared intel with him and as such, he too has hope in the game.

My beloved Jonathan met up with the tribes once again where this time they had to race to release a series of balls, catch them, play skee ball, carry it through a mud pit and then land it in a suspended pyramid. And Brains, there is no puzzle, so I worry you’re in danger. That being said, Brains got out to a 5-2 advantage in the ball section of the challenge, so maybe I’m wrong again. Wait, nope. While they were first to get to the skee ball section, Brawn took the lead as George struggled to land his ball. While they eventually got to the final apparatus, they were no match for Brawn who finally snagged their second immunity challenge win with minimal competition.

Back at camp the Brains were heartbroken to have another immunity loss and while George was feeling the heat since he single handedly lost the challenge,  he has the idol so was completely unbothered by things. And since the rest of the tribe are focused on taking him and only him out, this isn’t ending well for someone else. Joey meanwhile was confident in his numbers and well, Joey girl, you in danger I guess. He caught up with his allies by the water and quickly locked in the vote for George, while George decided to get politicking, quickly pulling a counter alliance together against Andrew, Joey, Georgia and Laura.

As the rest of the tribe bonded by the fire, George disappeared to go get water and then returned to camp wearing his immunity idol in an iconic, bold move. As everyone started to shit their pants. While everyone tried to act confident that he may not play the idol, he lay in the sun waiting for someone to come and talk to him. While they sat in camp mocking his move. With that, George instead pulled Cara and Wai aside to talk about voting for Joey or Laura. Cara opted to go and try woo Rachael and Hayley, while the cool kids suggested Mitch was a good option to vote out instead. Given he is so focused on being the leader, which is something they don’t want to deal with.

The four then approached Rachel to woo her on side and while Rach was keen, she was also listed as fifth at best before they got to her and that feels obvious. She then caught up with George, who quickly got the politician hat on, assuring her that this is the time to prove loyalty to each other and to show trust. While Rachel was just thrilled to be the swing vote with Hayley, as they appeared to prefer to get the vote off Laura and instead on to someone else. But I’m often wrong, so prepare for Laura to be savagely booted despite us never getting to know her.

At tribal council George was still rocking the idol with an open shirt look and was almost selling it, while Joey was still cranking up the energy to an 11 just like Kate Ceberano in a radio interview (another story for another time). He did admit that things started to get nervous at camp, while Rachel agreed that coming to tribal is a chance to see where everyone stands. Laura admitted there are personality clashes in the tribe, while Cara countered by saying the relationships are fluid and that people continue to evolve. Joey disagreed and said that there are definitely firm names assigned to the alliances, with Rach agreeing things were happening while Mitch felt that his relationships are post-alliance. Which is never a great thing to think in Survivor.

Rachel admitted that the length of time between their first vote and now has complicated things while George charmingly pretended that he didn’t have an idol before reminding everyone that the vote is about drawing a line in the sand and as such, they need to trust who they trust and just embrace it. Mitch reiterated that George is pretty much off the table, while Joey suggested that he doesn’t care about George wanting to make another tribal council about him despite feeling nervous about the power of the idol. Joey then got savage talking about how George saved five people at the first tribal but somehow ended up with no allies and as such, he wasn’t concerned about anything George tries to pull off.

Though George gave zero Fs, given he is playing the game differently to other people and therefore doesn’t care about Joey’s shade. Wai questioned whether the idol would get played while Rachel didn’t worry whether George would play his idol. While George just wanted Jonathan to acknowledge his body-ody-ody. Before Hayley reiterated that trust is all that anyone cares about and as such, that is what it is about tonight. And Andrew just wanted everyone to get along.

With that, the tribe voted, George played his idol – needlessly, might I add – as four votes landed on Laura and the rest on Dr Mitch, sending him from the game. Much to his confusion, shock and the shady commentary about the brutal blindside from Geroge. As Mitch cussed him out as he exited tribal council, unaware that George had nothing to do with the vote.

By the time Mitch arrived in my arms at loser lodge he was a little less angry, I assume because he got to see me, his dear Brisbane friend. You see, I was pretending to lecture as medical school when Mitch was training and while I was swiftly fired in shame, Mitch saw me as the broken person that I am and as such, tried to look out for me. Which eventually developed into a friendship. Aka a tale as old as time. Anyway, I knew that Mitch would be fanging for some comfort after his brutal blindside and as such, whipped up a big batch of our traditional Mitchroom Shawiss Burgers.

I had never thought of popping a mushie on a burger – unless it was the vego star of the dish, obvi – until I experienced the magic, beauty of Five Guys. A glorious place where bags are topped with fries and you get to decide every single element you can add on a burger. And lets just say, mushies, swiss and some onions are a near perfect trio to elevate a burg.

Enjoy!

Mitchroom Shawiss Burger
Serves: 4.

Ingredients
2 tbsp olive oil
2 onions, sliced
1 cup button mushrooms, roughly chopped
500g beef mince
salt and pepper, to taste
4 Briocher Bünsberg
⅓ cup Shayonnaise Swain
4-8 slices swiss cheese

Method
In a small saucepan, heat a lug of olive oil over medium heat. Once hot, add the onions and sweat for about ten minutes, or until soft, sweet and caramelised. Reduce heat to low and keep warm, adding dashes of water if they start to catch.

Meanwhile, heat another lug of olive oil in another saucepan or frying pan and once hot, add the mushrooms. Cook for a couple of minutes, or until the mushrooms release all their liquid and suck it back up again.

When you’re almost ready to eat, scrunch the mince in your hands and then form into 4 hockey pucks. Brush the remaining oil in a large frying pan over high heat. Once scorching, sprinkle salt and pepper on the tops of the patties and add seasoned side down in the pan. Immediately flatten with a metal spatula until 1cm thickness and immediately season the other side of the patties. After a couple of minutes, flip the patties, top with swiss cheese and cook for another minute or so until they’re the desired doneness.

To assemble, toast the inside of the buns, spread each side with some mayo, top with the cheesy patty, some onion and the mushroom.

Then devour, greedily.


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Chicken Struendell Holland

Main, Poultry, Survivor, Survivor: Winners at War, TV, TV Recap

Previously on Survivor after Sandra arrived at the Edge of Extinction, she realised that there was no way she was going to be winning any challenges to re-enter and nor did she want to needlessly suffer, so she raised the sail and went home. Meanwhile in the main game, Sele continued to be an absolute mess yet somehow only lost the immunity challenge by a matter of seconds. Michele should have been the obvious target as the only OG Sele, but given Wendell was being super shady and making everyone feel uncomfortable and Yul is smart as hell and the only Old Schooler, it came down to them. And while Michele and Nick both seemed to be keen to work with Yul, the fact that he was a legitimate threat compared to Wendell was too much, as they sadly booted him from the game.

We checked in with everyone at the Edge of Extinction where Danni explained that they had all received menus with how to spend fire tokens ahead of the upcoming return challenge. Now that it was real, she was starting to visualise getting back into the game and hot damn, I would live for that. Natalie used her wealth to purchase a single advantage in the challenge and an idol, which Rob copied after Amber handed off her own token, which honestly makes me a little sad. Though a fired up Rob going into the challenge is something I always love. Each of the inhabitants separated to prepare for their battle and honestly, I’m so annoyed that Parvati and Yul have no chance to purchase anything because they lasted the longest and didn’t have a chance to earn any.

While the old schoolers got on a boat, the active players met Probst by the shore where they learnt that Sophie is now the player from the oldest season in the game. Not getting time to dwell on that, or the loss of her closest ally, Probst told them all to drop their buffs before announcing that one more person will be joining them in the newly merged tribe. In walked Natalie, Amber, Danni, Ethan, Tyson, Rob, Parvati and Yul, shocking everyone in the game when they realised that the Queen had quit the Edge of Extinction like the total icon that she is. How great would this group have been as the merged tribe, though?!

Natalie explained how painful it was to be on the Edge by herself, before Tyson shared that he hides behind his humour a lot of the time and how he struggled on the Edge debating what was best for his two daughters at home. Rob said that despite being on the Edge with his wife, it wasn’t a romantic feeling as it was desolate and awful. Coupled with the fact that he felt responsible for the old school players getting targeted from the start, he was hating it and ready to fight to get back. Because that is how the old schoolers do it.

To get back in, Probst explained, they would need to race through a series of obstacles, complete a jailbreak and then maneuver a ball up an upright snake and into its mouth. First to finish, returning to the game. He then explained that Natalie, Danni, Ethan, Tyson and Rob had purchased advantages in the challenge, and as such, would not need to dig up a rope. Tyson got out to an early lead with Rob, Ethan, Danni, Parvati and Natalie hot on their heels. Given Parvati never earned any Fire Tokens, she, Amber and Yul were stuck digging for their rope, giving everyone else a huge lead. Eventually they managed to get the string, while Rob was far out in front making his first attempt at the jailbreak. Which he was successful at. Natalie and Tyson were next through, followed by the advantage-less Yul and Parvati – icons – Danni and Ethan, while Amber was stuck at the jail. Everyone tried to learn the maze, with Natalie making it halfway up before dropping, giving Tyson the lead while Yul and Rob were close behind. And holy shit was it close, as Yul dropped and Tyson landed his ball seconds before Rob.

As everyone applauded his mammoth efforts, his fellow Edge inhabitants encouraged him to crush the competition before being sent back to the Edge of Extinction as the first seven members of the jury.

The merged tribe arrived at the former Sele beach where Tony was heartbroken to learn that the Fire Token menu had changed, with prices going up leaving him too poor to buy anything. Not even a measly stick of gum. Thankfully, they found their bountiful feast and honestly, I think he forgot about his lack of wealth pretty damn quickly. Everyone caught up and congratulated Tyson on his victory, before Sarah shared how proud she was to have made the merge once again though was nervous to go the Cagayan route again, given the alliances are all jumbled. 

Not to dwell on it, however, she decided to find out what happened to her ally Sandra, with Denise explaining that Sandra had taken pity on her being on the bottom and offered to sell her an idol for two Fire Tokens, unaware that Denise already had one. As such, Denise played Sandra’s idol on herself and hers on Jeremy, sending Sandra from the game with one lousy vote. As everyone congratulated her on a big move, Sophie likened it to a war story while Tony started calling her the Queen slayer, expertly growing the target on Denise’s back. Adam was shocked to have made the merge without any of the old schoolers, with everyone assuring Tyson that it wasn’t deliberate. While Tyson speculated that maybe the new kids have just changed the game to the point that he can’t keep up, before laughing it off, assuring us that he will find cracks and make his way to the end. 

The tribe returned to camp, delighted to see how epic Wendell had made it for them, complete with coconut vending machine, swing sets and bench seating. Speaking of Wendell, he was feeling solid with Michele and Nick, though was looking to foster more relationships to take control. He set his sights on Jeremy, chatting about how they could bring everyone together with Jeremy confident he could at very least bring in Denise. Though Jeremy was concerned about Nick being Wendell’s number one, and as such, he wanted to get rid of him to guarantee his bond with Wendell.

Meanwhile Tyson was catching up with Ben, explaining that early in the game he had tried to push for a threats alliance to keep all the strong players together. And as soon as they decided against it, Rob, Sandra and Parvati went out back-to-back-to-back. Feeling like a big threat – lol – Ben liked the idea of working with shields and as such, was super keen to align with Tyson, along with Jeremy and Tony. And given they are already outnumbered, they need to make a move and take control before people notice. Ben approached Tony, with him quickly agreeing given he knew that people like Wendell, Nick, Adam and Michele are strong players however have the lowest profiles and as such, aren’t on anyone’s radar.

The tribe sat around in the rain, with everyone miserable except for Adam who reminded us that his season was evacuated for a day due to a cyclone and that this was nothing by comparison. Clearly forgetting that David vs. Goliath was also evacuated for a worse cyclone, but whatever, we barely hear from Nick these days. We did hear from the icon Kim though, who isn’t being classed as a target for some reason, who just laughed about how miserable everyone is.

Probst arrived for the first individual immunity challenge – the Parvati special, where everyone has to hold on to a large pole – with the last person of each gender holding on, snatching immunity. And a Fire Token. Despite crying through the cold before the challenge, Sophie looked strong while Adam kept telling us how scared he was of the challenge as he slid down. Ultimately Michele was the first person out, dropping violently from the challenge. While Tyson, Sarah and Tony all struggled, Adam was the next to drop before awkwardly trying to help Michele to the loser bench. Tyson – a former winner of the challenge – was the next out, followed by Tony and Wendell. Sophie was the next to go, leaving Denise and Kim to battle it out, as they both started to slide down the poles before Kim dropped, handing Denise immunity. Ben followed the women out of the challenge, leaving Jeremy and Nick to battle it out as Jeremy scowled at Nick, and he gave a sweet angelic smile. Ultimately though, Nick dropped handing Jeremy the other immunity necklace and token.

Back at camp Jeremy was keen to get rid of Nick, though hoping to stay out of the spotlight as it happened. Tony and Ben caught up with him, as the trio agreed that they needed to break up Nick and Wendell. Sadly for Jeremy though, he flubbed it, saying that keeping Wendell would be good for his, no THEIR game, as such they should get rid of Nick. While they agreed that Nick was super sketchy and just loiters around and approaches all conversations, Ben was beginning to think that it wasn’t the best idea. Nick approached Jeremy, Wendell and Michele to suggest they get rid of Adam instead, while the former Yara tribe floated the idea of getting rid of Nick, before Queen Sophie suggested they just get rid of Wendell instead, given she can’t work with him moving forward.

Despite wanting to keep a low profile, Sophie realised that Jeremy was trying to dictate the vote and take power and as such, started to work hard with Sarah and Tony to push the vote on to Wendell. Ben took this information back to Jeremy who was pissed to be outplayed, and as such, was open to jumping on an Adam vote instead. With that Jeremy went from alliance to alliance to float getting rid of Adam instead, with everyone open to it, given it was an easy vote. Michele pointed out that Denise may be the only concern if they get rid of Adam, so Jeremy approached her with her assuring him that she is cool to get rid of Adam, given he is a liability. Sophie and Adam caught up, with Sophie assuring him that she is pushing hard to get rid of Wendell or Nick and as such, she will be blindsided if he goes instead. And damn, Adam was crying at the prospect of going home, which is so relatable.

At tribal council Tyson spoke about how desperate he was not to return to the Edge and as such, he was keeping his mouth shut. Sophie acknowledged that he has less baggage than most people in the game because he was voted out, and as such, he is an easier person to work with. Tony reiterated that sentiment, pointing out that most of the reasons that got Tyson voted out are sitting on the jury and as such, it doesn’t make sense to get rid of him at this stage. Denise was thrilled to have immunity for such a pivotal vote, knowing that she will still be here after everyone finds out where alliances lay. Wendell downplayed how pivotal the vote is, though agreed it is a tricky one to navigate. Adam spoke about how quickly some conversations had gone and as such, that made him feel nervous. Nick agreed that he loves to double check, though he had to find the balance of looking solid rather than paranoid.

Sophie proved why she is so damn good at this game, countering that on the flipside, she likes to give herself the freedom not to be included in every conversation as it proves to her allies that she trusts them and also helps her relax about an already stressful game. Sarah said that it takes a while for a name to gain traction this season and as such, everyone voted out was likely to be sniped rather than seeing it coming. Jeremy agreed that they’re all playing cagey, while Adam was frustrated that people don’t want to talk. Tony said that he would rather go with the flow this season and keep as many people happy as possible and oh my god, he is going to avenge the targets and win, isn’t he?

With that the tribe voted and thankfully Sophie was not blindsided – Adam I could take and leave though, despite a killer voting confessional – as her machinations came to fruition and Wendell was blindsided from the game and became the first person to play in the 30s to go to the Edge of Extinction. While Wendell was playing a harsher game, he still took his boot in stride and was super kind when I pulled him aside on his way out the door. Though I would be kind if someone handed me a piping hot Chicken Struendell Holland too.

Creamy, rich and oh so soothing, this is everything that Wendell isn’t to Michele post-break-up. Slash competing without Dom, TBH.

Enjoy!

Chicken Struendell Holland
Serves: 6.

Ingredients
1 tbsp olive oil
1 onion, diced
1 leek, trimmed, washed and sliced
1 carrot, diced
4 garlic cloves, minced
600g chicken breasts, cut into a 1cm dice
4 button mushrooms, trimmed and sliced
2 tbsp flour
300ml cream
salt and pepper, to taste
36 sheets filo pastry
80g butter, melted

Method
Pop the oil in a large skillet over medium heat and cook the onion, leek, carrot and garlic for a few minutes, or until the carrot starts to soften. Add the chicken and cook, stirring, for a few more minutes, or until nice and brown. Add the button mushrooms and cook for a further minute before stirring in the flour and cooking for another minute. Then stir in the cream, bring to the boil and reduce to low until the gravy has thickened. Season to taste and leave to cool.

When the filling is cool, preheat the oven to 200C and line a baking sheet.

Pop two pieces of filo on the bench, brush with butter and add another piece of filo, alternating until you’ve got six sheets of pastry. Pop a sixth of the filling in the centre of one of the short ends, and roll to enclose. Fold in each side before rolling until the end of the sheets, sealing with some extra better. Transfer to the lined baking sheet and repeat the process until done, brushing the finished strudels with some butter to finish.

Transfer the strudels into the oven and bake for 20-30 minutes, or until golden and crisp. Leave to rest for five minutes before serving alongside your fave veggies. And devouring.


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