TV Recap

Luxx Tiknoir Lasagdon

Main, Pasta, Poultry, RuPaul's Drag Race, RuPaul's Drag Race 15, TV, TV Recap

Previously on RuPaul’s Drag Race the top four returned to the Werk Room ready for a triumphant final lap on their way to the finale before Ru gagged them with the fact there would only be a top three this year. Meaning after the rumix and film clip, one of the dolls would claim a final win and another would suffer the unkindest cut of all. Obviously Sasha was perfection from start to finish, while Luxx’s songwriting skills took her through to the finale with Sasha. At the other end of the pack, Mistress getting in her head and Anetra’s not-sure-why were all it took to land them in the bottom. Thankfully forcing Mama Ru’s hand as she finally dished out a double save to keep our very deserving top four intact.

Before we get to the finale though, we have to reunite and sadly the only way out of a season is through. As such, the dolls all took their places on the Ace Theatre stage in alphabetical order – that is Amethyst, Anetra, Aura, Irene, Jax, Loosey, Luxx, Malaysia, Marcia Cubed, Mistress, Princess, Robin, Salina, Sasha and Sugar and Spice, the latter two being out of order on a technicality since they were treated as a sole entity. After reminding us that American politics is a total dumpster fire riddled hellscape, Ru addressed Mistress’ passion for kleptomania – relatable – with her admitting to taking books, earrings and some wigs. Before she gagged us with the fact that Anetra stole things from the set too. In the form of lightbulbs.

Given reunions are generally pretty talk heavy and boring, we will stick to the highlights. The first being how delightful Sugar and Spice were! The former was proud to have learnt how strong she is which Spice tried to reiterate, until she lost her train of thought. Mistress admitted that while she didn’t vibe straight away, she was thrilled by how quickly they won her over and is proud to now have them as her daughters. We then got a supercut of the eras with Irene relishing her screen time era while Sugar was in her nail era, despite not wearing nails. Talk turned to the dolls passion for making it a top two each week before it turned into reading Loosey for always thinking she should win. Until Sasha reminded the dolls that in most of these battles, she took out the win which is all that truly matters. 

It then turned into a compliment sandwich as Amethyst spilt the tea that before being cast, Loosey spoke about winning everything if she ever competed when working together at da clurb, before my dear friend Kevin Bacon dialled in to praise Loosey for her Dragloose performance. Oh and then the dolls read Loosey for not letting loose when singing her song, let loose.

We addressed the lip syncs of the season, with Sasha and Anetra’s from Lalaparuza still amazing everyone. Anetra was also present in the best of the season, with Marcia Cubed and hot damn, I still wish it was a double save. Irene praised Anetra for being a killer performer, and I love how wholesome it is. They pivoted back to the Lalaparuza, choices, with Malaysia still pretending she wasn’t going for the easy kill in Marcia. Talk then turned to everyone not thinking Mistress beat Jax in the lip sync and ugh, I love her confidence and also now think how boring this season would have been without her.

Robin and Amethyst’s history came up again with the former thinking Amethyst was a little deluded, while they both reiterated the importance of not shitting where you eat. Talk turned to crushes on the season with Aura admitting she is hot for Princess, despite the fact she is getting married.

Coco Montrese dialled in to ask Marcia about her make-up skills, with her proud of how much she has improved. Oh and she is releasing a make-up line, with Aura asking if it would just be eye liner. Which is a hilarious read. Asia dialled in to ask Sasha who her favourite drag performer is, with her opting for Monica Monroe. DeJa called in to ask Robin for a Best Buy discount – like an icon – Aquaria asked why Irene trolled the dolls online all season, with Irene essentially admitting she just wanted to be involved. Which is awkward since Mistress blocked her. Maybe. Derrick asked Loosey if she blames it on the edit. Robin’s mother asked Mistress why she came for her daughter in the first episode, with Mistress reminding them she was just in her chaotic era and nothing more. Aura’s mum asked Spice why she wanted Aura in the bottom in Snatch Game, given she would have been sent home if she faced off against her baby. 

We finally got to see more of the reading challenge and damn, Salina was glorious. Ru opened the library for the eliminated dolls, with Sugar hilariously reading Robin’s screen time before Spice asked to read Sugar. Princess read Aura for being a torn bottom and Loosey for her lack of taste, while Irene read Sasha for being beautiful. Oh and Salina hates Irene, apparently based on her epic eyerolls. Talk turned to the many gates of the season ad yeah, the dolls loved to fight. And I love them for that. Malaysia admitted she just didn’t realise Luxx was trolling her during Metalgate, Loosey admitted she didn’t have a bump during Babybumpgate and Loosey just felt like Mistress was just always coming for her during Heavengate. While Anetra just loved everyone else’s drama. Oh and things turned to 40-inch gate with Luxx finally admitting she just likes to round up.

Ru turned our attention to some of the best looks we didn’t get to see from the eliminated queens with Amethyst living for her rip it to shreds look, Aura’s Bey runway was stunning, Malaysia’s glove look was perfect Mrs Clause, Irene’s Miss Cleo puffer look was stunning, with Sugar thanking her for all her looks and admitted she looked forward to her posting them each week. Oh and then Maddy Morphosis dialled in to announce Salina won the Golden Boot of the season – for the metal street sign look – with her thrilled to finally win something.

Talk returned to the hateful drag bills with Robin speaking at Yale Law given most of the lawmakers have graduated from there, and Yale wanted to take a stand. Irene reminded everyone that the laws are not just targeting drag queens and they are actually designed to hurt the trans community, with Sasha agreeing that she feels particularly targeted and nervous about the bills, but also reminded her sisters that it means they are doing something right because they have them scared. Thus legislating against people living their lives and bringing joy to the world. Oh and then the queer Connecticut Caucus dialled in to thank their queens, with Loosey breaking down to see how much support they have from their little state.

Ru offered everyone a chance to clear the air, with Irene asking Mistress if she made up that Loosey said she was shocked Irene had had filler given she was saggy. Anetra admitted that in addition to the lightbulbs, she also stole Amethyst’s baby – for Snatch Game – before talk turned to social media backlash, with Mistress thanking the sisters that spoke out when she and Luxx were getting hate. We then got a recap of the top four’s run, most importantly being the moment Anetra walked that fucking duck into our hearts. Luxx’s stunning Visage couture runway perfection, Mistress’ camp ridiculousness in Daytona Wind and Sasha in the rumix, since they had to narrow it down to just moment. Despite the fact she slayed each and every week.

Once the dolls finished their kiki, I confidently stomped onto stage – maybe channelling Anetra’s duck – and tapped Luxx on the shoulder to let her know it was her time for a celebratory catch-up. Of course she wondered why the future winner of the season wasn’t saved for last, until I explained that I based the last two dates on wins – All Winners All Stars style – meaning since Anetra and Sasha had more, she had to settle for the reunion. And while she didn’t love my TEDTalk style explanation, her mood drastically improved upon seeing the Luxx Tiknoir Lasagdon come out of the oven.

While this number is new to my heart – thanks again, Alan Carr! – there is no denying its perfection. The fusion little UK number is the perfect combination of spicy, sweet and comforting, which coincidentally is how I would describe Luxx’s run this season.

Enjoy!

Luxx Tiknoir Lasagdon
Serves: 6.

Ingredients
olive oil
1 onion, diced
6 garlic cloves, minced
2 tsp ginger, minced
3 tbsp garam masala
1 tbsp cumin
1 tsp smoked paprika
1 tsp chilli powder
1kg chicken mince
800g canned diced tomatoes
3 tbsp butter
1 tbsp muscovado sugar
2 cups milk
½ cup Greek yoghurt
salt and pepper, to taste
1 lime, zested and juiced
2 tbsp flour
250g dry lasagne sheets
3 cups mozzarella, shredded

Method
Preheat the oven to 180C.

Heat a lug of oil in a Dutch oven over medium heat and saute the onion, garlic and ginger for five minutes, or until soft and sweet. Add the garam masala, cumin, paprika and chilli powder and cook for a further minute to release the flavours. Add the chicken mince and cook, breaking up lumps with the wooden spoon for a few minutes, or until browned. Stir in the canned tomatoes, 2 tablespoons of the butter, muscovado sugar, ½ cup of milk and the Greek yoghurt. Bring to the boil, reduce heat to low and simmer for about ten minutes to reduce slightly. Season to taste and stir in the lime zest and juice. Remove from the heat.

Meanwhile, melt the remaining butter in a saucepan over low heat. Once foamy, stir in the flour and cook for a couple of minutes. Remove from the heat, season and whisk in the remaining milk, before returning to the heat and bringing to the boil for a couple of minutes. Remove from the heat.

To assemble, add enough meat sauce to cover the base of a large baking dish. Layer over a third of the pasta, followed by a third of the bechamel and then, you guessed it, a third of the cheese. Repeat the process from meat, to pasta, bechamel and cheese until you finish with a cheesy top before transferring to the oven to bake for 40 minutes, or until cooked through. Remove from the oven and allow to rest for a further half an hour before devouring, like an icon.


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Joshuarrabbiata Wilder Sauce

Main, Pasta, Sauce, Survivor, Survivor 44, TV, TV Recap

Previously on Survivor the dwindling yet iconic Tika tribe tried to rally after Josh idolled Sarah out of the game. Despite Yam Yam being the only person blindsided in the process, he tried to make amends with Carolyn and Josh, and enjoy their time. Josh meanwhile tried to pretend he found another immunity idol, though sadly for him the beads from treemail fell apart in Yam Yam’s hands as Carolyn realised he was also using the exact same note from the first idol. After losing the latest immunity challenge, Carolyn had an awkward journey-feast with Brandon and Danny which made her realise that the alphas were banding together and as such, targeting Josh was the smartest move. Thankfully for him, however, there was no tribal council at all as Matthew’s shoulder felled him from the game.

The next day the Tika trio were nonchalant about avoiding certain doom as Yam Yam and Carolyn debated the pronunciation of bag – or is it baeg? – just like my mother. Josh meanwhile was thrilled to still be alive in the game, though well and truly ready for some new company. Right on cue, we dropped by Soka where the tribe read treemail advising them to drop their buffs, pack up their belongings and bounce. Tika too were told to pack, while Ratu was thrilled to learn that the non-merge (and then I assume real merge) will take place on their beach, meaning they could just chill. Carson meanwhile was ready for some chaos before pointing out that the wording of the note means they haven’t merged, but does confirm his idol is powerless. As such, he announced that he had one, leading to Lauren sharing the fact that she has an extra vote. For reasons.

Soka and Tika arrived and everyone did some casual getting to know you, while Kane was just nervous about where he stands and how exactly things will play out in the larger group. Josh meanwhile was thrilled to be away from Yam Yam and Carolyn, unaware that Carolyn had spread information about his idols to Brandon during their journey and for some reason, he lied and told him that he does in fact have one. After he caught up with Jamie and told her the truth about being down to a fake idol only, she caught up with Heidi and Frannie to talk about his idols or lack thereof, with Jamie confident he does have an idol, despite her being the only person he told the truth to. Confused? Same!

The group came together at camp to talk about the pre-merge phase with Josh being a little extra about Yam Yam turning on him, despite the fact they were on opposite sides of the vote and there was no real betrayal. Feeling nervous, Yam Yam started to make new friends, catching up with Matt who assured him everyone doesn’t hate him and instead Josh was meant to go at their next tribal council on Soka, and to him, he is still the next target. After Yam Yam explained that Carolyn is being super quiet at the moment, we ventured back to camp where Carolyn admitted she was super nervous about keeping her personality in check to get people on her side. Before she went and told them all she loves sweating. Thankfully though, it was quickly brushed over and she was able to lay low as she wanted until it was the right time to reunite Carson. 

Speaking of Carson, the right time came about later that night as they caught up on the beach and pledged their undying loyalty to each other. Yam Yam then joined them to lock in a secret trio, agreeing to keep their distance for the next while and come back together to take control later on. Once the big threats have finished cannibalising themselves, that is. Also that night, Matt and Frannie were sleeping next to each other and being cute and flirty and I want them to adopt me. Or at least make me a flowerboy at their wedding.

The tribe came together with Jeffrey for the Earn the Merge challenge – eyeroll, of course – with the tribe split into teams to race to push a massive boulder along a course to collect keys, climb a tower and use the keys to unlock puzzle pieces and solve a puzzle. Oh and in addition to getting buffs and immunity at tribal council, the victors also got a feast. Matt, Frannie, Carolyn, Carson, Brandon and Jamie faced off against Heidi, Danny, Lauren, Yam Yam, Josh and Kane with the latter getting out to an early lead before the other group overtook them on the next two obstacles. They continued to pull away until Danny and Josh pulled everyone from their group up the wall. However, that headstart meant nothing when it came to the puzzle, given Carson had repeatedly studied it before the game and solved it in a matter of minutes. Earning the merge and handing his group a feast.

Back at camp the losers were heartbroken to be starving, while Yam Yam was terrified about being the most likely target. He caught up with Danny and Kane, suggesting they should get rid of Josh next which annoyed Danny, given he didn’t want to make any decisions without the winners present. As he worried about putting his foot in his mouth, Josh was busy locking in Lauren and Heidi to get rid of Yam Yam and while they pretended to be on board, Heidi still felt like Josh was a bigger issue for her game. Idol or not. The victors meanwhile were giddily smashing their food before talk turned to tribal council with everyone happy to get rid of Josh too. That being said, Brandon was worried about the idol and as such, needed to identify a backup, with him more than happy to get rid of Kane for voting for him at the first tribal council. Oh and then Carolyn straight up told them Josh does not have an idol, calmly articulating his entire web of lies yet for some reason, nobody believed her.

Everyone reunited at camp with Jamie worried about how easy the plan to get rid of Josh came together, though was confident in having Kane as a back-up. Frannie meanwhile was assuring Josh that Kane is the target, leading to Josh approaching Yam Yam to bury the hatchet and tell him they should come together to get rid of Kane. And while Yam Yam pretended he was ok with things, he assured us that Josh is far and away his last option. Brandon meanwhile wasn’t overly worried about the Josh plan falling apart, given he has his beef with Kane. Carson meanwhile warned Kane that his name came up at the feast, however Kane in turn stupidly threw Carson under the bus by approaching Brandon to see what happened. And while he calmly admitted he did throw his name out there, he approached Carson to tell him how stupid it was. Oh and then Kane’s nerves got the best of him, approaching Matt and Danny to throw out the idea of changing the vote to Yam Yam. Matt then told Josh he was the target and hot damn, it is a mess and everyone seems confused.

At tribal council Carson spoke about how difficult it was to keep track of what was happening during the scramble, while Kane assured everyone he is operating from a place of trust and will vote based on that. Yam Yam admitted he is at a disadvantage, even more so given he just can’t stop running his mouth. Ever. Josh downplayed his bond with Yam Yam and Carolyn, pointing out he is more Soka strong. Essentially. Talk turned to idols, with Brandon not sure what exactly is going on and who could have them. Carolyn agreed there were a lot of variables to work around, while Heidi felt like it was hard to keep up with the plans, given everyone has their own opinions. Yam Yam admitted he was feeling very nervous and unsure what conversations he could trust, while Matt felt that this non-merge is intense and he honestly doesn’t even know what is meant to be happening tonight. With that the non-tribe voted and no idols – real or fake – were played as they banded together to finally oust Josh from the game.

Obviously Josh was super gutted to have found himself booted before the legit merge and *gay gasp* not on the jury, meaning in the words of the great Kat Edorsson, he is no longer datable. As he arrived at Loser Lodge I pulled him in for a massive hug and assured him that Kat is wrong and any man would be lucky to have him, despite the fact he and Yam Yam couldn’t get it together and run the game with the rest of our queer fam. I congratulated him for doing all that he could in the game, despite essentially being shut out on both of his tribes and toasted his run with a big vat of Joshuarrabbiata Wilder Sauce.

While marinara is the most famous of the tomato based sauces, my heart belongs to its spicy cousin the arrabbiata. A delicate hint of garlic and a kick of chilli work together to provide a complex, rich sauce that elevates any pastas. And is super easy to make, to boot.

Enjoy!

Joshuarrabbiata Wilder Sauce
Makes: 2-3 cups.

Ingredients
2 tbsp olive oil
1 onion, diced
4 garlic cloves, minced
3 red chillies, halved, deseeded and roughly chopped
1 tbsp tomato paste
800g canned whole peeled tomatoes
1 tsp raw caster sugar
2 tsp balsamic vinegar
salt and pepper, to taste

Method
Heat the oil in a frying pan over medium heat and saute the onion and garlic for about five minutes, or until soft and sweet. Add the chillies and tomato paste and cook, stirring, for a further couple of minutes.

Stir in the canned tomatoes and sugar, bring to the boil before reducing heat to low and simmer for about 15 minutes, or until thickened. Stir in the balsamic vinegar and a good whack of salt and vinegar before serving, with your fav pasta. Or if it isn’t about the pasta, pop it in a cup and drink it down.


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Mistress Isamaple Crookies

Baking, Dessert, RuPaul's Drag Race, RuPaul's Drag Race 15, Snack, Sweets, TV, TV Recap

Previously on RuPaul’s Drag Race the top five played a little quiz game for the power to assign teachers for this year’s makeover. Despite having to read herself for the win, Loosey paired everyone with people that made sense for each of them. Well, except for Luxx, who she decided to take revenge on for reading her for filth all season. While Loosey and her new sister looked like legit twins, the judges felt they had no chemistry on the runway. Luxx gave nothing to build their family resemblance, though her new daughter did look like Jennifer Collidge which should count for something. Ultimately Anetra was perfect from start to finish, which handed her her third win of the season while Luxx and Loosey faced off in the lip sync, with Luxx coming out on top and sending Loosey out in fifth place.

Backstage the dolls soon discovered Loosey was completely annoyed to be eliminated, while Luxx found it hilarious that Loosey was eliminated after trying to play dirty. Mistress on the other hand was just proud of Loosey for finally admitting she was playing the game, in addition to being stiff competition. Luxx admitted she was heartbroken to have been in the bottom so close to the end, while everyone was just excited to have made it to the top four. Anertra was proud of herself for being neck and neck with the one and only Ms Colby, while Sasha herself was just hoping for no last minute goopery costing her place in the competition.

The next day Ru dropped by to announce that for their final maxi challenge, the dolls would be writing and recording verses on Ru’s song Blame It On the Edit before filming the film clip with Miguel Zarate (swoon). And sitting with Ru and Michelle for a tic tac lunch, like icons. Oh and then he announced that only three of them will be going through to the finale, which obviously left them gagged. Just as Sasha feared. After Ru left, the dolls split up to listen to the song and work on their lyrics. Mistress was obviously super confident given she is shady as hell, while Sasha is glad she knows words. Anetra was planning to lean into her brand – voguing and sex – while Luxx felt like she had it in the bag, so went aside to have a nap like Pearl and Jinkx before her.

Sasha was first up to chat with Ru and Michelle, welcoming them to the meet and greet before talking about her epic career leading to this point. She admitted that she has struggled throughout the season, not wanting to do too well given she didn’t want the girls to hate her. She opened up about how her lack of support from her mother is what makes her worry about gaining people’s approval. She then went very deep, talking about how she was left everything after her father died, and how that was almost a seal of approval. And ugh, crown her.

Speaking of crowning her, Sasha’s co-winner Anetra was up next, talking through growing up Mormon and how drag is what opened her up to every colour of the rainbow. Michelle then gushed about how good her and Marcia’s lip sync was – shoulda been a double save – labelling it the greatest of all time. She spoke about how she learnt to vogue in Vegas, while Ru praised her for always bringing something to the challenges that only she can. Oh and you best believe winning would mean everything to her, and prove everything was worth it.

Mistress was next up, talking about what made her such an outspoken icon and how that got under Loosey’s skin. Who she in turn felt was different on camera to what she was like when the red light went out. She spoke about how she came to the competition wanting to prove why she deserves the crown, and that she desperately wants to make everyone proud. Particularly Mama Chavelle, winner of Season 16. Oh and you best believe she is now in her top three era. She tapped out with Luxx who spoke about how she came to the competition ready to serve looks at every moment. Oh and she opened up about going to Cicely Tyson high school and honestly, I am jealous as all hell. She spoke about how her parents taught her to be confident and proud of herself, and you know she took that and ran and now, is always ready to prove a bitch wrong.

The top four came together on set to work through the choreography and given Sasha is serving Barbwire realness, you know she is winning. Everyone admittedly looked amazing, though Mistress kinda got stuck in her head, worried about learning it all in time and ugh, it sucks to see someone so confident get so nervous. Without any time to process things, the back-up dancers were brought in and the dolls were put through their paces in front of the red light. Luxx was perfect from start to finish, while Anetra was surprisingly nervous. Most importantly, Luxx lost a nail in her outfit and ugh, she is hilarious and I am going to miss her when the season is over. They traded out with Sasha and Mistress and similar to the others, Sasha was perfect at every damn moment, while Mistress was so focused on the choreography, she didn’t give the attitude.

Elimination Day arrived with the dolls splitting up to prepare for the final runway, with everyone shocked by how quickly the challenge has gone. Luxx and Sasha were obviously thrilled to have nailed the challenge, while Mistress vowed not to let the choreo get her down. Anetra too was nervous, given it took her some time to get it down, though was confident she did enough in the end. Mistress asked everyone to talk through their first impressions, with Anetra loving Luxx from the start while the dolls were all shocked by how kind and down to earth Sasha is, given she is as sickening as her legacy. Mistress always knew Anetra would be a silent assassin, while everyone was gagged by how much she has grown as she came into her own around the dolls. Anetra meanwhile loved that while Mistress is obnoxious, she showed she also had a massive heart too.

Talk turned to all of the feuds and damn, these girls really fed us with the drama. Well, Luxx at least, who found herself at the centre of all the -gates. Before they turned their attention to the fact one of them will win, with everyone confident they deserve to make it to the top but also nervous about falling so close to the end.

It was family only on the judges panel as Ru, Michelle and Ross took their places on the panel as Anetra opened the Drag Excellence runway looking stunning in a fitted blue velvet gown in honour of her Asian heritage. Luxx meanwhile was perfect in a shimmering white gown with a huge, curly wig. Sasha meanwhile was glorious in a silver crystal gown, referencing her Hawaiin heritage in the best ways possible. Before Mistress closed the show in a fringed, crystal cheetah print gown and ugh, I love it. Particularly since she wore it in a pageant previously, meaning she is the Kate Middleton of drag. When it came to the film clip, we may be able to Blame it on the Edit because everyone was stunning. Anetra was fierce as hell and v on brand, Luxx was full chanteuse, Sasha was sexy and perfect in every moment, while Mistress rapped the house down and delivered all the attitude.

After thanking the top four for all nailing the challenge, the judges praised Anetra for combining old and new on the runway and looking beautiful. They praised her for getting stronger from week to week, and truly shine when she let them in. Oh and Ru was proud of her, no doubt for showing off her branding prowess by always walking the duck. Luxx was praised for having such impeccable taste and always looking perfect. And showing off everything she has to offer. They all spoke about Sasha’s legacy and how somehow she exceeded all expectations week after week, and constantly slayed. And more importantly, she showed her massive heart and how she is always giving back to her sisters and the community and AGAIN, crown her. While Mistress was beloved for always giving polish and charm, truly showing Houston excellence at every moment. Though also being a versatile and intelligent performer each week.

Ru pulled out a picture of 5 year old Isiah, asking Anetra what she would tell herself, asking him to hold on through the dark days, knowing that one day the world will be safe for you to shine. And it will be so much better than she can even imagine. Luxx told baby Justin that all his dreams will come true, he just needs to know that everything that comes his way is what makes him who he is. Sasha told baby Sasha that she is a stunning woman, and that trusting her instincts will be what makes her dreams come true so just hold it down and know that you are loved. While Mistress told herself that despite how confusing life will be most of the time, that fire within will be what keeps him holding on to hope and that eventually, he will find his tribe and achieve the world.

Backstage the dolls were gagged by the fact one of them will still go home, with Mistress in particular nervous about struggling through the challenge given she has slayed all season long. The dolls rallied around her, agreeing she has done so well that it would suck to be in the bottom. Luxx was fairly confident she would not be in the bottom, despite Mistress reminding her she is kinda delusional. Sasha praised them all for being different and giving something unique, while they reflected on how great they have been throughout the season. Mistress’ least favourite moment was calling Marcia’s drag cheap and her favourite was proving herself in the Snatch Game. Anetra called Luxx’s highlight wearing her Ru look, while she loved saying Loosey should go home. While Sasha pointed out Mistress struggled with Love Connie, while her least favourite was the standup challenge. Everyone agreed that Anetra’s favourite moment should have been her ninja realness in the talent show, though.

Ultimately Sasha took out her fourth win of the season and booked her place in the finale, before Luxx was sent through to join her. Meaning Anetra and Mistress would have to face off for the final spot to Kelly Rowland’s – I don’t care about David Guetta – When Love Takes Over and ugh, they were stunning. Both of the dolls leant into the passion of the song, hitting every lyric, being silly when required and obviously serving tricks  as Anetra walked the duck once again, as Mistress tried to swat her out of the competition. It was cute, it was fun and well, thankfully Ru went back on her word, going with a double shantay and keeping both of the girls in the running moving on to the finale.

Despite the fact all the dolls were kept in place, I had already gotten busy in the kitchen, so tapped Mistress on the shoulder and told her that I’d like to pre-emptively celebrate her run in the competition. And given the number of wins was the fairest way to decide who would be first, she was the first I’d be catching up with. While she questioned whether that meant I didn’t think she would win, I pulled her in for a massive hug to stop her questioning, instead getting her to focus on how good her run was. As despite only getting one win, there is no denying how good she has been each and every week. Which alone makes her more than worthy of a shot at the crown and a piping hot batch of Mistress Isamaple Crookies.

These cookies are the perfect little snack – Halloween decorations, or not. The delicate flavour of the maple works perfectly with the crunchy cookies to provide the ultimate all rounder snack. Perfect for celebrating a queen that is good at nearly everything.

Enjoy!

Mistress Isamaple Crookies
Serves: 8-12.

Ingredients
300g flour
1 tsp cinnamon
1 tsp baking soda
1 tsp kosher salt, plus a pinch for icing
150g unsalted butter, at room temperature
200g muscovado sugar
1 egg, at room temperature
160ml maple syrup
2 tsp vanilla extract
1 cup pecans, roughly chopped
115g icing sugar
any sprinkles you feel inspired by, for decoratin’

Method
Sift the flour, cinnamon and baking soda into a bowl, and add the salt. Meaning in a stand mixer, cream 120g of butter and the muscovado sugar on medium for a couple of minutes, or until light and fluffy. Scrape down the sides, add the egg and mix for a further minute on low. With the mixer running, add half the maple syrup and vanilla extract, mixing until just combined. Remove from the stand mixer and fold through the dry ingredients and pecans before returning to the mixer and beating for a minute or so, until well combined. Form the dough into a disc, wrap in cling wrap and transfer to the fridge to chill for a couple of hours.

Preheat the oven to 180°C and line two baking sheets. 

Once the dough is chill, using an ice cream scoop, roll out 1-2 tablespoon balls of dough and pop on a baking sheet, allowing plenty of room for spread. Once all rolled out, pop the sheets in the oven and allow to bake for about 15 minutes, or until lightly browned and cooked through. Remove from the oven and allow to cool on the tray for a couple of minutes before transferring to a wire rack to cool completely.

While the cookies get chill, pop the remaining butter and maple syrup in a small saucepan and whisk over a low heat until combined. Whisk in the icing sugar and a pinch of salt and stir until it has come together again. Drizzle the warm glaze over the cookies, add sprinkles for fun and allow to set for five minutes before devouring. Like a winner.


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Mater Grinstot-Maylffles

Breakfast, Snack, Street Food, Survivor, Survivor 44, TV, TV Recap

Previously on Survivor the three tribes were sitting pretty, confident in the fact they could ride things out to the merge together before starting the next phase of their battle royale. Sadly for them, the producers opted to give us a little format tweak and after sending Jaime, Carson and Josh to journey island, they found themselves returning to a new tribe each. And while that kinda sucked for them, they didn’t go alone, each gifted a hidden immunity idol which would last up until the merge. After Tika tragically lost another immunity challenge, Yam Yam, Sarah and Carolyn were ready to kick Josh to the curb. Well, until Yam Yam and Carolyn started feuding over the latter always being the decoy name, leading to Carolyn flipping to work with Josh to blindside Sarah instead.

Back at camp Yam Yam and Carolyn bickered back and forth about tribal council, with Yam Yam trying to get her to understand that he would have done what she wanted at tribal council if she just told him, while she in turn argued it didn’t seem like that. And told us that she felt more like Yam Yam was upset about being left out, rather than not being told. She explained that she had been made to feel like the third turd of the alliance, before the duo admitted they were just kinda sad that they had issues, questioning if they would be able to move on and come back together. Josh on the other hand was thrilled to have survived against all the odds.

We visited with Ratu the next day where Matthew started to break down to Kane about how much pain he has been in, unsure how he will be able to push through the rest of the game. Kane meanwhile was the absolute sweetest, talking about how proud of him he is as Matthew started to cry again. He also got teary when talking about it to Carson by the well and ugh, I hate where this is going because it feels like this is going to be Kaoh Rong 2.0. Carson meanwhile was thrilled by how much headway he has made within the tribe before he and Kane bonded over being so nerdy and ugh, I just love them both. So, so much.

Checking in with Soka, Danny was leading them through some breathing exercises and just like Kane and Carson, I love him. Because he is so much kookier than you’d expect from a challenge beast. We then learnt that he has a four month old at home and ugh, my basement is flooded. Jaime meanwhile was living for their vibe and so grateful to have landed on Soka, though knew she was clearly on the bottom. As such, she went off with Matt for a wander through the jungle, chatting away, despite Jaime being frustrated by how slowly he is playing the game. She then approached Frannie to let her know she can not read him, with Frannie thrilled she clearly hasn’t figured out how close they are, meaning she can get a read on things and protect him. Given they are clearly falling in love.

Things were still tense over at Tika with Yam Yam asking Josh to stop being angry with him so they could have a fun day. And while he said they could, he kept giving Yam Yam the bitch face – his words – and that annoyed him. But bless, he kept trying. Josh meanwhile was upset because he felt like Carolyn and Yam Yam reuniting may be inevitable and as such, needed to protect himself. He lied to Yam Yam about having a second idol, showing him the note from his last idol to get it over the line. They then bonded over being gay, sharing their childhoods and coming out stories, and well, this is 100% the kind of thing that is more likely to save both of them. Josh meanwhile felt he was sitting pretty now, have bonded with each of them and just needing to decide who to target should they lose the next immunity challenge

Right on cue, the tribes reunited with Jeffrey for said challenge where they would be tethered together and race with a bucket of water over a series of obstacles to release a gate. And then two would solve a table maze, with the first two tribes immune and the loser going to tribal council. Oh, and once again, the victors would get to choose who goes on the next journey. Tika got out to an early lead – YAS – with Ratu nipping at their heels, while Soka fell behind. Everyone evened up at the gate however, so it came down to a race on the table maze with Soka whipping through it and landing their first ball with Ratu nipping on their heels. On their second ball, Soka dropped it, giving Ratu the lead as Tika continued to fall further behind. They raced to take out the win for the extra power with Ratu jagging it just ahead of Soka, while Tika would return to tribal council. Ratu then quickly locked in Brandon as the person from their tribe heading on the journey, with Danny going from Soka and Carolyn from Tika. 

Jeff then ominously called in medical to review Matthew’s injury, as he opened up about how he feels like he just can’t recover and the environment of the game isn’t helping. Probst then told him how strong he had been for his tribe, while Matthew was left to figure out what to do.

We checked in on Yam Yam and Josh back at camp where the latter spoke about wanting to hang on to his idol if he could, as the duo promised to work together. Yam Yam then talked smack about Carolyn, saying she is way more strategic than she appears, warning him that she needs to go ASAP. While Josh was just concerned about what Carolyn’s journey may mean for the game.

Speaking of the journey, the trio arrived at the island where they discovered that rather than an advantage they would instead be enjoying a feast at The Sanctuary to encourage them to talk about the season thus far. Carolyn meanwhile was thrilled to be smashing food, despite the fact she still has to contend with tribal council tonight. She opened up to the boys about Josh’s idol from the swap, inadvertently letting them know that Jaime and Carson also have one. Brandon and Danny then locked in an alliance post-merge, with Carolyn hilariously questioning whether they are including her in this, given they were literally talking as if she wasn’t even there. Though given it blessed us with some hilarious reaction shots from her and made her angry when they kept discounting her, it means we could be in for a Shonee-esque revenge arc. Which is always a good thing.

She ventured back to camp where the boys met her on the shore and quickly told them how much she doesn’t want to work with the bro-alliance, signing to Yam Yam that they need to work together as Josh is likely to go with them. And while he felt it was hilarious, he was glad to have his Carolyn back. She told both of them about the meat brigade which is forming, pointing out Josh was included in their plans and that she was told she would be in the alliance if she saved him. This spooked Josh, who pointed out that he has an idol so it isn’t even a question at this point – it is though – before Carolyn wisely asked to see it. And while Yam Yam assured her he had seen the note, when he whipped out the fake, Yam Yam immediately pointed out the beads actually came from treemail. While Carolyn realised it was literally the same note she read two days ago. Oh and then it came apart in Yam Yam’s hands, and he and Carolyn burst out laughing.

The boys spoke about the fact Carolyn may still have an advantage, while Josh pushed to get her out because he is scared she will rally a counter alliance to the bro alliance he isn’t even in. We then learnt a little about Josh’s life which frankly sounds quite horrific, given how many medical emergencies he has experienced and now I need them to protect our zaddy at all costs. Yam Yam meanwhile wasn’t sure who to trust, catching up with Carolyn who pledged her undying loyalty, knowing that the other options out there are frankly crumby. And while he wants to trust her again, he doesn’t really know he can trust either of them.

Before he had to make a decision, Jeffrey arrived on their shores to let them know that tribal council will not be going ahead due to Matthew having to leave the game because of his shoulder injury. And while it breaks my heart for our plant zaddy king, I am glad the Tika trio live to see another day. Since I now also love Josh and his apparent goal to be the US’ Simon, aka suffering from a case of severe bottomness.

I was a wee bit surprised to see Matthew arrive at Loser Lodge in broad daylight, though I put that aside to pull him in for a gentle hug and tell him how heartbroken I am to see his injury take him out of the game. It was so sad to see someone so excited to be in the game and then have that excitement ultimately become their undoing, particularly someone like Matthew who had already proven himself adept at the game. I assured him that like Bruce before him, I will demand to Jess that he gets a second shot, however the tragedy is that like Nina on HvV, he is now at a disadvantage since everyone will know just how good he is at the game. But I guess that’s what our strategy session was for, over some Mater Grinstot-Maylffles.

Sure, the name may not roll off the tongue as much as I would like, however I was in a rush to throw something together due to his surprise exit and wanted to gift him a perfect recipe. Which is exactly how I would describe tater tot waffles. They may just be throwing tots in a waffle iron, but the magical transformation as they cook is breathtaking. Crunch and glorious, they are equally as perfect with bacon and eggs or as the basis of a burger. Aka, they can do no wrong.

Enjoy!

Mater Grinstot-Maylffles
Serves: 2 queer icons, with long hair and a passion for flannel.

Ingredients
500g tater tots (or Potato Jems, as they are known in Australia)

Method
If you’re using store bought gems, allow them to defrost completely otherwise allow the gems to cool if you’ve made them from scratch.

When you’re ready to go, line the games within a waffle iron, close it and place over a medium heat to cook for about five minutes, or until crispy. Flip the iron and repeat for a further few minutes to crisp. Transfer to a plate and repeat the process until done.

That’s it. Well, other than devouring, of course.


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Loosey LaDucanut Cake

Baking, Cake, Dessert, RuPaul's Drag Race, RuPaul's Drag Race 15, Snack, Sweets, TV, TV Recap

Previously on RuPaul’s Drag Race the producers once again proved to be shady little icons, as the top six starred in Wigloose! The Rusical, mere moments after Anetra sent Marcia Cubed home in the lip sync of the season. After everyone kind of knocked it out of the park and slayed the runway, leaving Ru to jump on the shade train and task his dolls with identifying who should go home for him. Luxx gave an elaborate Ted Talk about how wonderful and unique everyone is except for Loosey, Loosey and Anetra said Salina, Salina returned serve and identified Loosey while Mistress wanted to put an end to Sasha’s meet and greet. Sasha on the other hand wanted to cut Luxx or Loosey for being her biggest threats. Ultimately though another emerged as Anetra took out her second victory, before Loosey defeated Salina and sent her back to WeHo.

Backstage the dolls were disappointed to have lost Salina, well mainly just Sasha, who considers her a friend and shared how proud of her she is. They discovered her mirror message was about her deserving to go home, which obviously made Loosey feel a certain way, given her name was said multiple times too. And you know she felt it just sucked. As they sat down, Mistress laughed about how she could have been mean but didn’t, so hello congeniality era, yet again. Luxx meanwhile doubled down on EVERYTHING she said, with Loosey trying to be calm as she said she will obviously disagree. She bit her tongue as best she could, with Luxx shutting it down, reminding them the end is in sight and that she will be doing nothing but focusing on making it.

The next day the tension was put aside as Mistress assured them she will be winning this week before Ru dropped by to briefly distract them with a little Spill The Tea mini challenge, complete with Norvina. Basically it is a quiz where they have to answer questions guessing who the group thinks will be the most likely answer. If that makes sense, because I really struggled to think that one through. In any event, it was a little bit shady and a whole lot of fun, with everyone kinda feeling their oats and laughing it up, with Loosey even saying she will be the next to go home just to guarantee her victory in the challenge.

After Norvina was swept away, Ru announced that for this week’s maxi challenge the dolls would makeover teachers in honour of his High School drama teacher. And as the winner of the mini challenge Loosey had the power to pair up the queens with their teachers and while she had the opportunity to be shady, she literally paired them up with their most similar person. Well everyone except Luxx, meaning she is either winning or sending Loosey home and there is no in between.

The duos split up to get to know each other with Anetra’s teacher – Mrs Mahoney – a Drag Race superfan absolutely adorable, despite being nervous to walk the stage. Loosey praised Mrs Wallace for being so smiley and happy and they are super similar, so this should be easy for Loosey. Mistress and Miss Tang were essentially twinning and I love that for them, particularly as her teacher broke down as Mistress thanked her for living proudly and vibrantly for her students. Sasha and Mrs Marchbanks – who watches Drag Race with her husband – were ready to go OTT and pad for the Gods, while Luxx just seemed a little awkward, despite Mrs Reyes giving her full control over everything. While Luxx worked on the outfits and completely forgot they needed to form a relationship too. Mistress’ daughter quickly learnt to be as shady as her mama, challenging Loosey’s daughter to a walk off. And while I’d love to say Mistress and her baby won, Loosey’s daughter kinda served. But trust, Mistress was focused on winning when it counts.

Ru dropped by to kiki with the queens with Sasha first up introducing her daughter Ferocity Colbybanks and talking through their sexy Hawaiian looks. Mistress rightly played on her daughter’s name, christening her Madame Thang, with her sharing she will also be whipping up two velvet gowns. Which will be super easy to hide a kitten heel under, just in case Madame can’t walk. Oh and Madame Thang is adorable and I love her. Anetra and her daughter were awkward and giggly, and I love them. As does Ru, so lets hope they both walk that fucking duck. Luxx and Mrs Reyes – aka Asia Azul – were very mismatched and while I want Mrs Reyes to kill it because she is adorbs, I have a bad feeling. While Lala and Loosey LaDuca were going with the vibe of rich ladies at the beach, with Ru getting shady and asking Loosey how she felt about queens saying she should go home. And what do you know, she would have Ru believe that she is completely unbothered.

Oh and before Ru departed she announced that in addition to walking the runway, the newest queens would also be lip syncing. So they have even more work to do. Loosey and Lala were first up to talk through lip syncing and Mrs Wallace is such a delight, I want only good things for her. Sasha was delighted her daughter knew who Leiomy is, Mistress went full Abby Lee on her daughter while Anetra tried to help her find her duck walk. And well, poor Luxx’s teacher was giving mum dancing and it was so sweet and she needs to win just because of that.

Elimination Day arrived with everyone split up to get their daughters in drag, wth Anetra proud hers wants a resting bitch face. They then bonded over wanting to find a place to escape reality, before Anetra asked if she believes people can unlearn bigotry and even just hearing Mrs Mahoney talk about how she definitely thinks things can always get better, I am filled with hope. Luxx’s teacher asked if she had experienced homophobia, with her opening up to Luxx that she left her church because she couldn’t stand them not accepting her children. Like a damn boss. Mistress’ daughter was nervous about walking the runway but distracted herself by getting shady, asking everyone to talk about their track records. With Loosey continuing to believe mini challenges matter. Mistress pointed out that Lala looks exactly like Loosey before they taught the dolls some slang. While poor Asia Azul looked bored and sad. While Loosey felt Mistress’ teacher looked like a Disney Villain, which is basically Mistresses vibe, so win.

Ru, Michelle and Ross were joined on the panel by Hayley Kiyoko as Sasha and Ferocity Colby walked the runway looking absolutely perfect. They were twinning, they were glam and oh so confident, and I love it. Loosey and Lala gave girls-trip realness, Mistress and Madame were full on glamazons before Luxx and Asia looked beautiful but gave zero family resemblance. And well, then Anetra and Alektra gave sexy Dr Evil and Mini Me realness and well, crown them now. 

The judges gave Sasha nothing but praise for giving complete family resemblance and clearly vibing. Ferocity meanwhile loved being padded. Loosey was praised for looking alike, though Michelle felt they weren’t on the same page on the runway while Ross wished that Lala’s shoes had been stoned for the occasion. Mistress was beloved for dripping in chemistry and attitude, before Luxx was praised for making Asia look so stunning – and giving off Jennifer Coolidge – before being read for doing absolutely nothing to give resemblance. Oh and then Anetra was praised for knocking everything this week completely out of the park, particularly for inventing the arm foreskin. And by the time she praised her teacher for bringing all the queerness to the classroom, it was clear it was another win for her.

Before sending the queens backstage, Ru put the teachers through their paces in their first lip sync for their lives to Ru’s Champion and well, they were all so amazing and living their best lives. And yeah, I love them. Particularly since Mrs Reyes is basically Jennifer Coolidge when she moves too.

Backstage the dolls toasted themselves for making the top five before Luxx announced that she knows she will be lip syncing. But trust and believe, she is ready for a fight and good luck to whoever she faces. She then pointed out Loosey is likely lip syncing with her, with Loosey agreeing, though quickly pointing out that she disagrees completely with the judges opinions and thinks she doesn’t belong in the bottom. Luxx accepted all of her critiques, though pointed out her teacher was living and having star quality is clearly their family resemblance. She then asked Loosey why she was shady with the allocations, with her trying to say it was because she was competition before admitting it was also because she was rude to her, leading to some epic tension. For ages. Before Mistress turned things positive, praising Anetra and Sasha for doing so well.

Talk turned to the teachers with Luxx living for how lovely Asia is as a parent, protecting her queer kids and supporting them to live their authentic lives. Loosey asked her sisters about their drag families, with Sasha pointing out they can provide all the love and support that queer people often miss out from their bio families. Sasha then got a call from the iconic Kerri Colby and ugh, I love her so much. And how much she is riding for Sasha to take out the win, which is correct. Loosey was up next with a call from her family and friends, breaking down as she got the unconditional love and support she had clearly needed. She then opened up how hard it is to be away from her family, apologising for being robotic due to being so focused on the competition.

The teachers dropped by to join their mothers who brought a lovely energy to the room, with Mistress explaining why Loosey and Luxx were rehearsing. Sasha’s teacher thanked her for making her dreams come true and then asked to stay in touch and ugh, I am so damn jealous she gets to be Sasha’s friend.

Ultimately Mistress and Sasha were sent to safety before Anetra rightly took out her third win of the season, leaving Loosey to lip sync for her life against her nemesis Luxx. And well, maybe she shouldn’t have set up Luxx, because she can turn it. That being said, you know that Loosey felt she didn’t belong in the bottom and was angry. So angry, she was ready to demolish Hayley Kiyoko’s For the Girls. As Loosey fought valiantly, giving camp and sass, Luxx was all fire, giving tricks, energy and all the sex and ugh, it was good. But sadly, once again track record took precedence as Luxx was sent to safety leaving Loosey to exit. In tears. 

As she found me back in the Werk Room, I pulled her in for a massive hug and praised her for giving such a dominating performance across the season. While her sisters – and maybe the producers – kinda trolled her or didn’t give her the flowers she often deserved, there is no denying she is a killer queen. Just sadly sometimes she was a little too polished, which appears to be triggering for Ru. I assured her that she did an amazing job throughout the season and reminded her that while queens like her often get trolled in regular seasons, they are usually the ones that dominate All Stars. Which is something I definitely see in her future, like a young DeLa for instance. And with that reference of BenDeLaChrist, she was once again her happy bubbly self and ready to tackle the world with a belly full of Loosey LaDucanut Cake.

Coconut has a very special place in my heart and I’ve spent years hunting for the ultimate coconut cake recipe, with this coming the closest to perfection I personally can muster. Sweet and flavourful, with a gorgeously light icing coated in chewy coconut, it is truly glorious.

Enjoy!

Loosey LaDucanut Cake
Serves: 2 dear friends, 1 being a future All Stars winner.

Ingredients
550g unsalted butter, at room temperature
2 cups raw caster sugar
5 eggs, at room temperature
3 tsp vanilla extract
1 tsp coconut essence
3 cups flour
1 tsp baking powder
½ tsp baking soda
½ tsp kosher salt
1 cup milk
300g shredded coconut, toasted
450g cream cheese, at room temperature
1 tsp almond extract
450g icing sugar

Method
Preheat the oven to 180C and grease two round 23cm cake tins.

Using a stand mixer, cream 350g of the butter and the raw caster sugar on medium speed until light and fluffy. About five minutes. Add the eggs one at a time, allowing the batter to come back together before adding the next, followed by 2 teaspoons of the vanilla extract and the coconut essence. It may look curdled at this point, but keep calm and carry on.

Remove from the stand mixer and sift in the flour, baking powder and soda, followed by the salt – which probs won’t sift – before folding into the batter, slowly adding milk as you go until it is all just combined. Return to the mixer and beat on low for a minute or two to ensure it is all together. Remove again, fold through 120g of the shredded coconut until just combined.

Divide the batter between the pans and transfer to the oven to bake for 45 minutes, or until golden and an inserted skewer comes out clean. Transfer to a baking rack to cool for half an hour before turning out and cooling completely.

As the cake gets chills, cream the cream cheese and remaining butter with the remaining vanilla and almond extract for a couple of minutes. Slowly add in the icing sugar and mix until smooth and combined.

When the cakes are cold enough to not ruin your hard work, pop a cake on a serving platter and spoon some icing on top to give about ½ centimetre layer once the second cake is stacked on top. Ice the top and sides of the cake before pressing with the remaining shredded coconut (and any extra, if desired) to coat the cake. Then devour, greedily.


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Golden Sarup & Wadamom Dumplings

Dessert, Snack, Survivor, Survivor 44, Sweets, TV, TV Recap

Previously on Survivor the three tribes were well and truly settling into island life. Despite being left out of the Helen vote, Sarah was assured by her fellow Tikans they are a solid four and will stick together to the end. Though she was still concerned about what would happen should they return to tribal council. After a bunch of shenanigans with cages, keys and fake idols, the tribes came together for the latest immunity challenge where you know Claire sat out once again. Sadly for her, however, it made her a target once Soka lost immunity and everyone realised she was disposable. While Frannie and Heidi tried to sway their respective partners to target Josh instead, the terrible timeline continued as we lost yet another iconic woman to the pre-merge.

The next day the new Soka tribe did a little sunrise meditation session to work through losing Claire. Not that Josh really needed it though, given he was firmly the swing vote between two pairs within the tribe. Sadly though, that wasn’t how things actually were with the two pairs actually keen to work together to take him out and go into the merge as two powerful duos. We ventured to Tika where the foursome were wandering around the jungle and discovered a new X made of sticks added to the cage, with everyone speculating what it could mean. We then learnt Carolyn is playing 5D chess, hiding the X on the cage and marking an X over where she hid the fake idol to trick someone into finding it. And ugh, I love her so much. The group went back to camp speculating what the X could mean as Sarah discovered Carolyn’s fake idol without anyone noticing. Even Carolyn, though she was grateful somebody found it.

The tribes met with Probst for the first reward challenge of the season where they would race up a ladder, over a cargo net and then shoot sandbags at a target. The trick being that every person on the tribe each needs to hit one of the targets in order to take the win. That being for either a massive or decent tarp, in addition to assigning which person from each tribe goes on the next journey. Danny got Soka out to the lead, followed by Carson for Tika while Brandon eventually connected to keep Ratu in it. Soka continued to power ahead as Ratu overtook Tika as Carolyn struggled to make the shot. Ultimately Soka took out victory before Carolyn finally connected leaving Tika and Ratu to battle for second with Ratu taking it out before Yam Yam even got a chance to toss his sack.

With the challenge out of the way things got interesting as Soka sent Josh, Carson and Jaime on their journey where they bonded as they trekked up a mountain. When they reached the pinnacle, they split up and made their way to a table where they were each given a hidden immunity idol to use up to the merge. The catch being they will not be going home to their tribes, instead pulling out a new buff with Josh joining Tika, Jaime going to Soka and Carson heading over to Ratu. Josh was first to meet his new tribe as Yam Yam, Carolyn and Sarah were gagged to have a new member. Despite welcoming him with open arms, Yam Yam was heartbroken to have lost Carson given they had become so close. The OG Tika’s tried to get to know Josh with Sarah thinking he was a surgeon, though he promptly lied about it and said he was a personal trainer. Sadly for him, Yam Yam could see right through his lie and he and Sarah secretly picked apart his timeline and confirmed they couldn’t trust him.

Over at Ratu Carson was regaling the new tribe with the journey that brought him here and while I love Carson, the fact that his first move to ingratiate himself was to throw Yam Yam under the bus as the leader breaks my heart. Sad to have lost his closest ally, Matthew pulled Carson aside to fill him in on what has been going on within the tribe to try and build trust. And while he left out the fact Jamie’s idol is fake, I love how hard he is playing. Soka were equally gagged to see Jaime arriving at their camp and while I would assume she is completely screwed, she is so kind and upbeat, I don’t see them wanting to get rid of her too easily. The OG Soka’s were concerned about her having an idol and spoiling their plans, so Danny got to work looking through her things though decided she was all good. Despite the fact she has one real and one fake idol.

The new tribes reconvened with Jeffrey for the latest immunity challenge where they would dive into the ocean one at a time, climb a tower and leap off to grab a key before swimming to a balance beam and walking over it. Once the four keys were collected, they would unlock puzzle pieces and solve said puzzle. Because, duh. Josh got Tika out to an early lead until Brandon powered across the balance beam and snatched the lead. While Danny was left right out. Lauren missed her key, meaning Brandon had to double back to collect one, given Soka and Tika time to close the gap. Well, Soka at least, as Yam Yam got stuck on the balance beam. Heidi and Matt got to work on the puzzle for Soka as Kane and Carolyn raced to make it to the end of the course, before Kane started struggling on the beam. Once Soka confirmed their win, Ratu and Tika powered through their puzzle before Lauren and Carson pulled ahead, securing immunity for Ratu and sending Tika back to tribal council. Just.

Back at camp the tribe were dejected by the loss, with Yam Yam disappointed but ok, given Josh is a super easy target as the newbie. Sadly Yam Yam told Carolyn she would be the decoy vote and while she said she was ok at the moment, she was super annoyed by it and sick of being told to accept being the secondary target. Yam Yam and Sarah pulled Josh aside to loop in him, assuring him that they desperately want to work with him and get rid of Carolyn. Though Sarah admitted she was a little concerned about him having an idol and assured us that should he play one, she will be playing hers. Josh then went to Carolyn and straight up told her that not only is she their target, but that he has an idol and would play it on her while they put their votes on Sarah and get her out of the game. Giving Carolyn the choice to send Josh out of the game or tell him where to actually play the idol and blindside Sarah.

At tribal council Josh spoke about how shocked he was to have been swapped to the new tribe and while he was an easy target, Sarah and Yam Yam spoke about how keeping him around could help build an alliance with his friends in Soka. Yam Yam spoke about how he may not feel like he is friends with his OGs anymore, which upset Carolyn given it felt like he was over her and wanted her out. As they started to fight, Josh admitted he was living for the chaos, though knew that the fight could all be a cover to make him feel safe. Carolyn felt that her loyalty was being ignored, as Sarah and Yam Yam spoke about aligning with Soka meaning Carolyn was clearly the target. If it isn’t an act. With that the tribe voted and Josh played his idol on himself while Sarah and Carolyn held onto theirs – whether Sarah’s was real or not doesn’t matter here, TBH – before Carolyn and Josh’s votes sent Sarah from the game. To Yam Yam’s shock and horror.

As often happens, Sarah found her way to Loser Lodge by following my tears of rage. This time due to having lost yet another iconic woman pre-merge. I mean, in the words of Taylor Armstrong – enough. I pulled her in for a massive hug and told her that the small starting tribes seem to have run their course, given time and time again, women and minorities are going out with just a few votes for no other reason than there aren’t enough people around to strategise with (or vote out). Add in a sea of advantages and well, refer back to Taylor ok? That being said, the new era has given us plenty of icons for another Second Chances season and that is enough to celebrate with a big batch of Golden Sarup & Wadamom Dumplings.

These fluffy dumplings are the perfect, soothing dish to warm your soul. Sticky and sweet with a beautifully spiced kick, they melt in your mouth and take away the pain of yet another season of femicide (thank f- Liz overcame this trend).

Enjoy!

Golden Sarup & Wadamom Dumplings
Serves: 6.

Ingredients
100g butter, diced
1 ⅓ cups muscovado sugar
¼ cup golden syrup
1 ⅓ cups flour
1 ½ tsp baking powder
1 tsp ground cardamom
¼ tsp cinnamon
⅔ cup milk
Vanilla Ice Cream, to serve

Method
Place 60g butter, 1 ¼ cups of muscovado sugar and the golden syrup in a large frying pan with 2 cups cold water and cook over a low heat for about 5 minutes, or until the sugar has dissolved. Crank the heat up to medium and bring to the boil, and cook for a few minutes until it reduces before removing from the heat.

Combine the flour, cardamom, cinnamon and butter in a bowl and, using your fingers, rub the butter through until it resembles wet sand before stirring through the remaining muscovado. Make a well in the centre, pour in the milk and stir with a wooden spoon until it comes together as a wet dough.

Return the caramel to a medium heat and carefully drop in a few tablespoons of batter at a time, leaving a little bit of space to allow them to puff up as they cook. Cover with a lid or some foil, reduce to low and simmer for 15 minutes, or until they are cooked through.

Serve immediately with a generous coating of the caramel and a hearty dollop of ice cream.


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Liz Parciuttov & Asparagus Pizza

Australian Survivor, Australian Survivor: Heroes V Villains, Main, Pizza, Street Food, TV, TV Recap

Previously on Australian Survivor 24 castaways arrived on the beaches of Samoa divided into Heroes or Villains depending on either how they play the game – for our 11 returnees – or how they intended to, for our newbies. Or their profession, in the case of our journos and real estate agents. As quickly as she came back for her redemption, poor Jackie was medevaced. She was followed by a string of newbies as Anjali, Michael, Mimi, Rogue and Sarah soon followed. George then set his sights on his nemesis Simon, but after a surprise individual immunity challenge we lived through the best tribal council of all time which cost Fraser his spot.

Iconic scream queen Sharni was next to go (back to Yabbie Creek, darl) before the swap (thankfully) cost Paige her spot in the game. We then suffered the tragedy of losing sweet Jordie before my dear friend and legit hero Benjamin Law was shown the door. Internal battles between the Spice Girls caused Stevie to be blindsided just ahead of the merge, before George’s instincts proved correct as Flick turned on them while Matt stayed loyal, allowing the OG Villains to take control and boot David from the game.

For her deception, Flick became Australia’s first ever Queen of the Jury before a lack of mateship sent Sam out. George then broke our hearts by turning on Shonee before the Villains turned their attention back to eliminating Heroes in the form of Shaun and Hayley. George and Simon’s feud finally came to a head with the King booting sweet, power-bottom Simon before Nina became the first Twine to join the jury.

The final four were gagged by Jonathan when he announced that they would be eliminating a juror with Matt and Gerry pushing to get rid of Shonee, given she was 100% in Liz’s corner. Which should have been a warning to George that he would not be making it to the final tribal council again, with the final three newbies banding together to send him to the ALL RETURNEE jury. At the final tribal council Liz well and truly rose to the occasion, laying out a comprehensive, nearly watertight argument why she deserved the win. Before the jury awarded her unanimously, making her our second Olympian to take out the crown. I mean, if presenting to the jury was an Olympic sport, she would come out on top while Sharn, famed barrister and two-time runner-up  wouldn’t even qualify. 

While the edit may not have shoved it down our throats, there is a very clear reason why Liz was not only the final woman and villain standing, but our newly minted Sole Survivor. And that is because she not only played a hell of a social game but also knew when to make the right moves. It may not have been the most exciting television watching the newbies ride it out with George at the end, however it made the most sense to use him as a shield as he will always be easy to eliminate at the end (another reason Sandra should actually always make it to the end, but people get too excited) as their best shot was with each other.

Despite Matt opting to eliminate Shonee from the jury for being a locked in Liz vote, he clearly underestimated the bonds she made and how well she would be able to articulate her game. Which is why he landed in second and she joins our iconic pantheon of winners. As the fireworks settled, I pulled her in for a massive hug – did you know I was a champion pole vaulter and we became friends on the circuit? – and thanked her for keeping us fed this season. More important than winning the title, she also managed to put an end to the long running Survivor curse and that is worth celebrating, with a glorious Liz Parciuttov & Asparagus Pizza.

This pizza is so delicious, it is hardly a surprise it had the power to end the curse. The earthiness of the asparagus works perfectly with the salty tang of the prosciutto and the creamy ricotta to deliver a pizza fit for the newest queen.

Enjoy!

Liz Parciuttov & Asparagus Pizza
Serves: 4.

Ingredients
2 bases as per Pizsa Zsa Gabor
⅔ cup ricotta
kosher salt and pepper, to taste
1 bunch of asparagus, trimmed and cut into lengths
1 lemon, zested
2 tbsp chives, thinly sliced
½ cup parmesan cheese, grated
6 slices of prosciutto, roughly chopped

Method
Prep the bases as per Zsa Zsa’s instructions and preheat the oven to 180°C.

Spread a thin layer of ricotta over the bases, followed by a sprinkle of salt and a good whack of pepper. Add the asparagus, lemon zest, chives and parmesan, before topping with the prosciutto. Transfer to the oven and bake for 10-15 minutes, or until golden and crisp.

Serve and devour triumphantly, knowing you’re the one person great enough to break an epic(ish) curse.


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Matt Borscharp

Australian Survivor, Australian Survivor: Heroes V Villains, Main, Soup, TV, TV Recap, Vegetarian

Previously on Australian Survivor 13 newbies were dumped on the islands of Samoa ready to do battle with 11 returnees to prove once and for all whether heroes or villains do it better. Nearly instantly Queen Jackie was violently dumped off a barrel in the first challenge, breaking her collarbone and ultimately medevaced from the game. Despite a warning at tribal council that George – who was also injured in the first challenge – may not return, they opted to continue with the vote and sent his only ally, the iconic Anjali Rao out of the game.

George ultimately did return however, with Shonee quickly pulling him into an alliance with her given she knew that as the only three time player on the beach, she needed another threat around as a buffer. Oh and she also found this season’s island bestie in Liz, and just like that Shiz was born. After losing yet another immunity challenge, Michael was felled for trying to target George. Stevie meanwhile was out for revenge against Shonee for blindsiding him on their first season, however when he was the target at the next tribal council, she redeemed herself in his eyes with a last minute flip to send Mimi out of the game.

Meanwhile over at the Heroes despite being the biggest threat as the sole winner in the cast, Hayley was feeling confident enough to throw the immunity challenge to get rid of Rogue because she was rude and abrasive. After losing the next immunity challenge, the Heroes were gagged to discover they’d be sending a mole over to the Villains tribe however when Sam said they were sending someone expendable, Gerry was less of a mole and more of a powerful tool for the Villains post swap. The Villains returned to their losing streak, running over the swing vote in Sarah before Fraser got caught in the crossfire of George and Simon’s feud in the most epic tribal council of all time.

When the Heroes returned to tribal council my love Benjamin idol-ed Queen Sharni out of the game before the swap arrived and kicked things into overdrive. Despite being outnumbered at the new Heroes, George and Shonee took control and blindsided Paige – ugh, hunting is yuck – before Jordie was felled back at the Villains despite having Shonee’s idol in his pocket. The Heroes then sent Benjamin from the game before Liz was able to mutiny to reunite Shiz before a feud between George and the girls led to Stevie tragically being booted. After the merge, the OG Villains and an assortment of friends took control, sending David from the game before Flick became our first Queen of the Jury. She was followed by her bestie Sam before queen, icon, legend Shonee was felled by George before she could get him, due to her being closer to Liz. Shaun and Hayley were the next Heroes to go, before George finally got to take out Simon and then opting to stick with the boys and take out Nina.

Jonathan threw in one final twist however with the tribe required to boot a juror with Matt and Gerry getting their way and sending Shonee out of the game due to her being a guaranteed vote for Liz. Which really should have been a warning to George that his goose was finally cooked, as they banded together with Liz to send him out of the game as our fourth place robbed goddess of the season.

At the final tribal council, Liz absolutely dominated her opponents and took ownership of the move Matt had pinned his entire argument on – getting rid of George – neutralising him in the eyes of the jury, and allowing our newest queen to take out the title unanimously, leaving Matt to finish as the co-runner-up with Gerry. As I said with Gerry, despite being shut out, Matt played a solid game and arguably did all he could to win as one of the few newbies left by the jury phase. Since George was clearly taking them to the end for an easy win. But alas, they cut him loose at the end (which was also Matt’s move, despite not having revenge attached) making Matt a lovely runner-up, with a hearty Matt Borscharp reward.

When I was little, the entire concept of borscht freaked me out, despite my passion for beetroot. I assume it had something to do with the fact I couldn’t figure out how to make cheese work with it, but that is a conversation for another time. As an adult, I finally tried borscht and fell in love with its rich, earthy perfection and the soup quickly found its place in my permanent rotation.

Enjoy!

Matt Borscharp
Serves: 8.

Ingredients
¼ cup olive oil
4 beetroot, peeled and grated
2 celery stalks, sliced
1 onion, diced
4 garlic cloves, minced
¼ cup tomato paste
8 cups chicken stock
2 cups water
3 potatoes, peeled and sliced
2 carrots, peeled and sliced
400g can cannellini beans, rinsed
2 bay leaves
2 tbsp champagne vinegar
3 tbsp dill, finely chopped
kosher salt and ground pepper, to taste
sour cream, for dolloping

Method
Place a large stockpot over medium heat and add a couple of tablespoons of olive oil. Once hot, add the grated beetroot, celery, onion and garlic, and cook for 10 minutes, stirring infrequently, until they are soft and juicy. 

Add the tomato paste and cook for a minute or so, before stirring in chicken stock and water, followed by the potatoes and carrots. Bring to the boil, reduce heat to low and simmer for 10-15 minutes or until cooked through. Add the beans bay leaves, vinegar and dill with a good whack of salt and pepper, and simmer for another five minutes or until cooked through. 

Serve with a dollop of sour cream and devour, like a boss.


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Almond & Cherry Geltch Danish

Australian Survivor, Australian Survivor: Heroes V Villains, Baking, Dessert, Snack, Sweets, TV, TV Recap

Previously on Australian Survivor after the boys tragically removed Shonee from the jury in the surprise final non-elimination, the final four finally faced off in their final immunity challenge. Set on the same cliff face that housed the iconic moment Kirstie convinced Lee to step off his perch, they would stand in torture devices as JLP turned a crank to further extend spearheads into their back with the last one standing guaranteeing their spot in the final three. After rolling out their loved ones – featuring the iconic Duchess of Double Bay, Cara “I’ve Cooked It” Atchison – they took their places before the Olympian took out immunity, forcing the boys to turn on each other. Despite Gerry’s plea to be voted out and let George stay, the newbies held firm as Liz finally got revenge and sent George to the jury.

The next day the final three awoke to watch the sunrise before Liz spoke about how difficult it was to vote out George, despite how great she felt to have gotten revenge for the legendary Shonee. Knowing the jury was made up of only returnees, the feeling was that they will reward gameplay, despite Liz being a little nervous about the fact it was also very hero heavy. After collecting their feast from treemail, Matt spoke about how much of an honour it was to make it to the end and make his family proud. Gerry was equally surprised, thrilled to have made it to the end despite being the oldest contestant in history. He then opened up about how much the victory would mean to him, given COVID ruined his business and he could now actually repay his family and rebuild his life. Before they all panicked about getting their pitches right.

At the final tribal council everyone took their places on the relevant benches before Jonathan explained how the evening would proceed as Liz kicked off the opening statements, talking about how she came in as a physical threat and that she has proven herself week after week. Despite that, she had no experience in the game and as such, absorbed all the wisdom of George, Shonee, Simon and Jordie to sharpen her skills. She built many alliances, forged via her stellar social game, but nothing compares to the fact that she was able to bide her time before finally getting revenge and taking out George. At the toughest position, as final juror. She then doubled and tripled down on the George vote being solely her move as Matt looked on awkwardly.

And damn, she is off to a strong start.

Speaking of Matt, he spoke about how he came out here driven to win for his family by building close social bonds. He outlined all the moments he was selfless, talking about how those moves made him a perfect person to flip without being noticed. Also he won three immunity challenges like Liz, but with an extra vote to boot. While Gerry was far less polished and intense, this time keeping it brief, telling everyone he is the oldest to ever play and he was thrilled to buck the trend of becoming a first boot. He fought through an injury and being deemed disposable, which ultimately led to him changing up his game and focusing on revenge against the Heroes. And well, he rode George to the end as his partner. And you best believe, he never missed when casting a vote.

We flipped over to the jury where Sam congratulated everyone on making it to the end before asking how Liz was proactive, with her articulating that she had to hit the ground running to simply survive against returnees. She then powered through the swap phase, building new alliances and then dominating at the merge. Simon then asked Gerry how he had control throughout the game, with him explaining you can’t succeed in this game by yourself and as such, he was steering the ship with George and while everyone looked sceptical, George confirmed it was true. Speaking of George he then congratulated them on making it to the end, asking Liz and Matt to articulate which move they made in the game that wasn’t instigated by him. Matt quickly tried to take ownership of getting him out, which Liz promptly shut down, telling him that a decision after the immunity challenge isn’t equal to her biding her time after the Shonee vote until it was the right time to strike. At final four, when she knew he would be vulnerable.

Matt then tried to say he considered working with Simon after the Hayley vote but ultimately didn’t, which TBH, doesn’t matter as it didn’t happen. Which is exactly what George told him, as he scolded him for not actually being able to name one, reiterating that he’d love to vote for him if he can name something. Liz then jumped in, because lol, telling George that there were many moments that she and Shonee spent time working behind the scenes to sneakily turn the tide against him, using saving Flick at the Stevie vote as an example as she continued to knock the question out of the park.

Hayley then asked Gerry if there was anything he regretted in his game, with him saying he doesn’t have any regrets and that he is proud of the game he played. He spoke about the 30 year age gap between him and the rest of the cast, and how he invested so much time in overcoming having nothing in common with anyone, leading to Sam patronising him about being terrible with human interaction. Which is a bit of a lol, given who it is coming from. Shaun then jumped in to say that he and David only spoke footy because it was their job, ripping Gerry for never taking an interest in him, pointing out that he has many things in common with Gerry, like hiking, however Gerry just never bothered to ask. 

Queen Hayley tried to get things back on track, asking them why they deserve to win, with Gerry talking about how the game gave him a new lease on life and whether they vote for him or not, he is a winner. Liz meanwhile spoke about how she has played an interesting, exciting game and was scrappy as she played from the bottom, being the last woman, last newbie and last Villain standing and she is ready to take out the crown that she rightly deserves. Given she expertly straddled the line between Heroes and Villains. While we got nothing from Matt, which is kinda sucky for him, given it makes it abundantly clear he isn’t winning.

With that the jury voted before JLP wheeled out the final three’s loved ones and got to work counting the votes, with Liz taking it out unanimously. Like an absolute boss. I pulled Gerry aside to congratulate him on a game well played, because despite being shut out by the jury, there is no denying that he really played the game as George’s partner. Despite a lot of those instances – the Stevie vote in particular – being a calculated move on George’s part to let him make the choice, Gerry more than Matt had agency throughout the game. Which more than earned him a piping hot celebratory Almond & Cherry Geltch Danish.

It feels kind fitting that both Gerry and George were bequeathed danishes on their first attempts at the crown, though I would argue Gez got the better version. Sticky, sweet and oh so moreish, this cherry and almonds are the perfect pairing to toasting the great man.

Enjoy!

Almond & Cherry Geltch Danish
Serves: 8-12.

Ingredients
2 sheets frozen puff pastry, partially thawed
350g cherry jam
¾ cup toasted slivered almonds, plus extra to top
1 egg
1 ½ teaspoon raw caster sugar
½ cup icing sugar
2 tsp milk
¼ tsp almond extract

Method
Preheat the oven to 160C.

Place the puff pastry on a lined baking sheet and spread the cherry jam down the centre third of each, leaving a two centimetre border at the top and bottom, before sprinkling the almonds on top of each.

Use a sharp knife to make diagonal cuts, along both long sides of the pastry, cutting until you almost hit the preserves. Starting at the top, fold the strips over the filling, alternating sides until you make it to the end, before pinching to seal.

Combine the egg and sugar with a tablespoon of water and whisk to double. Brush over the top of each and sprinkle with the extra almonds. Transfer to the oven and bake for 25 minutes, or until golden and crisp. Remove and leave to rest for five minutes.

Finally, combine the icing sugar, milk and almond extract in a jug and drizzle over the warm danishes, before devouring.


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Beef Bourgeorge Mladenov

Australian Survivor, Australian Survivor: Heroes V Villains, Main, TV, TV Recap

Previously on Australian Survivor after finally vanquishing sweet Simon, the tribe battled it out for a guaranteed spot in the final four, with Liz taking out immunity. And promptly rallying Nina and George to work with her to get rid of Matt, given he was her biggest threat. Sadly for her, George was getting nervous about rehashing his mistakes from the previous season, so didn’t want to blindside Gerry in the process of getting rid of Matt. This put him well and truly in the middle of the two duos, making him, once again, all powerful. Sadly for the girls, Nina gave a stellar tribal council performance, which sadly proved that she was the bigger threat – and confirmed she will vote for the best game – scaring George into flipping and taking her out with the boys. Though again, it also gave us our first Twine on the jury.

Back at camp George congratulated everyone on making it to the top four while Liz death stared at him, irate that he had ruined her plan once again and made her path to the final two that much more difficult. Later that night George dropped by to apologise to Liz who straight up cussed him out for signing her death warrant while he was sitting pretty with the boys. George however wasn’t bothered that she was salty given he was essentially choosing which final three he wanted to go with and he still technically has options, given she either votes with him at the next tribal council if he wants to take a shot, or she gets voted out.

The next day Liz was still super nervous, unsure how she was going to navigate the remaining days in the game. And I assume a little bit angry at herself for letting George blindside her again with Nina, just like he did our lord and saviour Shonee Bowtell. Once again though, she knew she had to suck up her feelings and caught up with him in the shelter, with George explaining Nina speaking so well at tribal is what made him change his mind. Liz pretended she was all good, though didn’t bother telling him about what Nina said to her on her way out the door. George then told us he just couldn’t break Gerry’s trust once more, whereas he knew it would be easier to win Liz back. Though he assured her that if Matt wins the next immunity, he will join her in finally getting rid of Gerry.

George next caught up with the boys, reminding them how hard they have worked to avoid the jury, with George telling us how given the jury is made up of only returning players, should he make it to the end, he will be rewarded for dominating the game. Gerry and Matt meanwhile were talking about the path ahead, both genuinely wanting to go to the final three with George and pledging their undying loyalty, before confirming what we have long suspected and that they assume it is a final two, at which point they are looking to cut him just before final tribal council as their big move.

While poor Liz just knew that she was completely screwed should she not win immunity.

Right on cue the final four met Jonathan for the latest immunity challenge. Or so they thought! Instead, it was a challenge for an extra vote at tonight’s tribal council, meaning there is definitely going to be a twist, because they won’t leave George without the chance of immunity at the final four. But anyway, back to the challenge as this one is a biggy! They would race to swim to shore and collect balls, land them in a shoot, crawl under a net and then solve a puzzle before climbing stairs and landing sandbags on five platforms. Matt took out an early lead with Liz nipping at his heels before George and Gerry somehow overtook her. That being said, the other three were kind of irrelevant as Matt continued to power ahead, solving his puzzle as Gerry arrived at the table, while George and Liz desperately tried to close the gap. Matt then got to work tossing his sacks, landing one after the other before anyone else even joined him, promptly taking out the extra vote.

After handing over said vote, Jonathan announced that tonight they will not be voting someone out of the tribe. (Side note: duh). Instead it is the return of the infamous juror removal twist and oh shit, I feel sick because Shonee has been mentioned multiple times already this episode and given Matt and Gerry now have three votes and they know she isn’t voting for them, she is toast. Oh and then JLP confirmed it is a final three, with final immunity coming up tomorrow before the final person will be voted out and replace the juror they eliminate tonight.

Back at camp the final four celebrated making it to the final immunity challenge before popping on some rice ahead of a vastly different kind of scramble. For some reason George started to talk to Matt about the fact that if you have a guaranteed vote, you’re that much closer to winning now that only 7 people will be voting for 3 people. George then went to Liz, both agreeing that getting rid of Simon is the best idea for them, given he is least likely to vote for them. The bad thing being that should be very clear to both Gerry and Matt, so therefore they should keep him. 

George and Liz joined the other two to try and sell it as revenge for Simon calling everyone pawns. Sadly for them, Matt gave them a non-committal response while Gerry suggested Nina would vote for Liz for being a female, rather than looking at the game. Liz rightly was offended by that with him explaining he just meant that they were closer and as such, she is way more likely to be swayed by her. Matt then shared with us that his extra vote puts even more pressure on him, given it could be the decision between winning and losing. Matt pulled George aside and told him he is open to both Nina and Simon, however feels like if Liz is sitting at final tribal council – because his and Gerry’s plan to go to three with the King has totally changed now – Shonee is a guaranteed vote for her and as such, she makes the most sense. George tried to point out Simon doesn’t deserve a vote, though stupidly didn’t try to explain that if he and Liz both make it to the end, they split Shonee and as such, make it a tiny bit easier for him to squeak out a win. I mean sure, it isn’t a great pitch, but it is literally the only one we’ve got to keep Shonee vibing on the jury.

Matt then pulled Gerry aside to float his horrible, no good plan. He told Gerry it is very clear they are being played by George with the Simon vote, given he is a guaranteed vote for one of them. Matt continued, explaining that since it is now a final three, they need to adjust their plans and get rid of George at the next vote. And therefore if they go to the final three with Liz, they need to get rid of the only guaranteed vote for her, in Shonee. George filled Liz in on the drama, with Liz telling him to get down to the shore and break it up as they can’t lose Shonee. With Matt expertly playing derpy and telling him they have realised getting rid of Simon makes the most sense as he arrived. Gerry and Matt then spoke about trying to play their cards close to their chest at tribal council so as not to spook anyone, while trying to weigh up who is the better option of going to the final three given everyone loves Liz while George has played the best game. Before Gerry wisely pointed out that George also has a lot of hate against him from the jury and as such, maybe he isn’t a guaranteed winner.

While Gerry just felt like tonight was a chance for him to draw a line in the sand by either going with Matt to eliminate Shonee, or sticking with George to take out Simon.

At tribal council Jonathan quickly caught the jury up on what would be happening tonight, explaining that one of them will be leaving tonight, which obviously pissed all of them off. Particularly Shonee, who appeared to know the writing was on the wall. George spoke about this being the most important tribal council he has ever attended since the winner will only need to secure three or four votes to win. Matt opened up about being the one with the extra vote tonight, and how while he has power, he still needs one other person to agree with who should go out. Gerry admitted two names were on the table pack at camp and that both are warranted to go out. George meanwhile spoke about how fierce debate was back at camp and as such, suggested things may still be up in the air, as Liz interjected and pointed out that she had actually thought they were on the same page.

George whispered to Gerry to see who he was thinking about voting out, with George reiterating he will be taking out Simon as Gerry gave him nothing. Matt spoke about how they need to make a choice between getting rid of a guaranteed vote for someone else or just someone they think will be bitter. As Gerry and George continued to whisper, Gerry told him he had a bad feeling about all the girls on the jury being locked in behind Liz before George pointed out that since she won’t be at the final tribal council, it shouldn’t matter. But you could kind of tell he realised he is definitely going out in fourth and maybe should have kept Nina. Matt and Liz then got in on the whispering, with Liz asking if we’re all losing Shonee before Matt announced he is confused, but ready to vote nonetheless. With that the tribe voted and Gerry finally swayed from George, though tragically it broke the hearts of the nation in the process, as he, Matt and even George removed Shonee from the jury. Which was 100% the correct move for two of them, but it doesn’t make me hate it any less.

As she just cruised on out of there and even further into our hearts.

The next day the final four were jubilant to officially be the last ones standing, with Gerry sharing how at the start he was ready to ride it out with the Heroes until they sent him to the Villains without any concern, leading to the second best revenge arc behind Queen Shon’s in All Stars. But just ahead of Stevie’s in this season, given it went nowhere. George meanwhile was just shocked to still be in the game given he came in with such an epic target. And now he just needs to survive one more tribal council to take out his deserved victory. His words. Matt on the other hand was shocked to have made it there, though knew that without immunity everything could come crumbling down. In the form of Liz, who knows she is out next without immunity, though you know she is ready to fight and given she is an Olympian, you know she has the resolve.

After a brief glimpse of Kristie, Lee, Jericho and Peter in their respective final challenges, the newest final four arrived at a cliff face to discover this year’s final immunity challenge. Which will feature them all standing on a narrow perch holding a handle above their head, while JLP will turn a crank pushing blunt spearheads into their backs to make things as uncomfortable as possible. But before that, he delivered a little bit of love to help motivate them. First up was iconic cooking queen Cara for George, followed by Liz’s boyfriend Daniel, Gerry’s fiance Pam and Matt’s pregnant wife Kirsty and oh lord, I’m crying, they’re crying, everyone’s crying.

The visitors were promptly kicked off to a bench to watch their loved ones be tortured as they speculated how long they would be up in the devices. After JLP gave the crank a spin, the boys all complained as Liz suggested it was nothing and begged JLP to give it another crank. Which you know he did! Instantly the boys started to feel the pain while the two-time Olympian laughed with glee. Mother nature then joined in the fun, unleashing a deluge of rain as they fought for an hour before JLP whipped out his crank to further dig the spikes into their backs. Which was all it took to take out Gerry, as he stepped off the perch while his competitors sweetly praised him for doing so well. After two hours and an additional crank, George suggested nobody wanted the win more than him with Liz calmly telling him he is wrong and to just wait and see. We got to three hours before Jonathan gave the spears another crank which saw George start to struggle, badly, as he begged Matt to hold on, before ultimately dropping out. Leaving Liz to battle Matt for final immunity. After four hours Liz started to get the shakes as Daniel willed her on before she requested JLP dish out one final crank.

As the loved ones watched on with baited breath, George swapped seats and started chatting to Gerry, telling him that all they need to do is stick together at the next vote and there is a way forward for them. Liz continued to breathe through the pain before Matt’s hand slipped off, handing Liz final immunity. And ideally, crowning her our winner.

Back at camp George was very nervous about the newbies banding together to take him out, though was confident in his ability to plot and scheme. Even in such a shitty predicament. Knowing she would have been out of the game if she didn’t take out immunity, Liz was well and truly feeling her oats and ready to finally get her revenge on George and send him out of the game. Gerry meanwhile congratulated everyone on fighting so hard in the challenge, talking about how humbled he was by their performance. He then took it one step further, telling everyone that he didn’t deserve to go to tribal council and begged them all to vote him out. Which George obviously jumped at, promising to do his wishes before getting to work wooing Matt and Liz.

George first pulled Matt aside to tell him how important it would be for them to just vote out Gerry and guarantee their place in the final three. And while he agreed to George’s face, he knew he couldn’t do it to Gerry and instead told him he would actually be voting for George and if he wanted to avoid making fire, he should vote out George too. Speaking of George, he pulled Liz aside to try his best, with Liz too pretending to be all in on the Gerry vote, though obviously, that would not be happening. Because revenge. Though George was confident Liz would have his back and as such, was ready to march to the end and take out victory.

At tribal council the jury were absolutely delighted to see that Liz had immunity – I wish Shon was here to see this – before she opened up about her own pride to have come out on top after such an epic, intense challenge. Particularly with her boyfriend there. George immediately cut her off to talk about how driven Liz is and how proud of her he is, while Liz spoke about the fact she was so driven because she knew she had literally no other option. Matt meanwhile was gutted to be the one coming in second, talking about how now they need to be smart about who they send out of the game. Gerry on the other hand spoke about how hard it would be to vote for either Matt or George. With that the tribe voted and despite Gerry’s plea the newbies banded together to take out George, as Liz wisely whispered in his ear that she finally got him.

As George arrived at the Jury Villa, I pulled him in for a massive hug and praised him on such a dominating performance. While he was disappointed to be eliminated so close to the end, he admitted he was expecting his massive target to take him out early so was thrilled he was once again able to find his feet and dominate. I then did a quick detour and yelled at him for turning on Shonee too soon and robbing us gays of our mother. I mean, I know she was planning to turn on him at the next vote, but given siding with the newbies landed him on jury, I would have preferred to see a wee more exciting end game by having her stick around a little longer.

While I would argue that come the merge, George got lucky that people knew he would be an easy vote at the endgame, there is no denying that he once again proved himself to be a master strategist. And that alone deems him worthy of going out as the fourth place robbed goddess of the season and the piping hot Beef Bourgeorge Mladenov prize that goes along with it.

Boeuf bourguignon is one of those dishes that has the power to convert even the most vehement beef naysayers of its delight. The meat melts in your mouth as the sweet, rich sauce washes over your tongue and fills you with glee.

Enjoy!

Beef Bourgeorge Mladenov
Serves: 6-8.

Ingredients
1 tbsp olive oil
200g bacon, diced
1.5kg beef brisket, trimmed and cut into a large dice
1 carrot, thickly sliced
1 onion, diced
10 cloves garlic, minced
kosher salt and pepper, to taste
2 tbsp flour
12 French shallots, peeled
3 cups red wine
2 cups beef stock
2 tbsp tomato paste
1 tsp fresh thyme, finely chopped
2 tbsp fresh parsley, finely chopped
2 bay leaves
2 tbsp butter
500g small mushrooms, quartered

Method
Pop the oil in a large dutch oven and sauté the bacon over medium heat for a few minutes, or until crispy and browned. Transfer with a slotted spoon to a bowl and set aside. In batches, brown the beef on all sides in the glorious bacon fat before using the spoon to transfer to the bacon dish. Finally, add the carrots and onions to the pan and cook for a few minutes before adding 6 of the garlic cloves and cooking for a minute, or until fragrant. Drain off the fat, leaving a tablespoon or two, before returning the beef and bacon to the pot. Stir in the flour with a good whack of salt and pepper, and cook for about five minutes, or until browned. Add the shallots, wine and stock, the latter to just cover the meat, before stirring in the paste and herbs. Bring to the boil, reduce to low and cover before simmering for a few hours.

While the beef is rollicking, heat the butter in a large saucepan until foaming before adding the remaining garlic and cooking for a minute or so, or until fragrant. Add the mushrooms and cook, stirring occasionally to coat, for about five minutes, or until browned and plump. Season with salt and pepper, before transferring to a plate.

Remove the bay leaves from the casserole, before stirring in the mushrooms and skimming off any of the excess fat that rises to the surface as it cooks until it reduces to a glossy liquid, enough to coat a spoon. Adjust seasoning before serving with a gloriously buttery mash and devouring, like a king.


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