Author: Benjamin Woodley Judd

Chorizjoe Blacroquettes

Party Food, RuPaul's Drag Race UK, RuPaul’s Drag Race UK 2, Snack, Tapas, TV, TV Recap

Previously on Drag Race UK the dolls worked tirelessly for four weeks, culminating in a glorious morning TV show where Bimini was an absolute star, despite Lawrence slaying and taking out her second win of the season. At the other end of the pack Sister Sister faded while Ginny stayed at one note which resulted in the duo landed in the bottom to lip sync for their lives. Only Ginny woke up and chose chaos that day – which, relatable given everything going on in the world at that time – exiting the competition mid-lip sync while Sister Sister gave it her all for safety. Unaware that she was already safe, thanks to Ginny.

Backstage the queens were in shock after Ginny self-eliminated, with Sister confirming that she didn’t even realise that Ginny had quit and that she was on stage by herself. Lawrence spoke about being pissed off about Ginny quitting, while Sister Sister wondered whether she deserved to still be in the competition or whether she is now just there by default. The queens sat down to kiki on the couch with A’Whora sliding back into the villain role by saying she was more shocked that Ginny was in the bottom two over Veronica, which continued to annoy Veronica until Bimini pointed out that her killer look clearly saved her. Veronica warned that nothing will keep her down and she will fight it out until the end. Before Tayce then jumped in and called her cocky, leading to another fight and damn, are these girls stressed.

Tia admitted that if they were all judging the bottom two, things would be different before Lawrence cut her off and pissed her off. This led to them almost cutting each other, until Ru arrived to announce that EVERYONE will be going home because Miss Rona – what I think is making all the girls a little more stressed than usual, TBH – and reconvene once it is safe.

Seven months later, Ru decorated the expanded Werk Room for a homecoming party with A’Whora first to re-enter, energised, nipped and tucked and ready to fight. Bimini was glorious, plasticised and hating on COVID, Ellie loved working the drive through again back home, Lawrence was feeling rusty after not working for so long, Sister Sister was fiery and loving her face work while Tayce was charming, ridiculous and now living with A’Whora full time. Oh and Tia was charming, lovely and didn’t change a thing, aside from less nervous energy.

While the girls awaited Veronica’s arrival, Ru returned in full Ginny Lemon cosplay to announce that Veronica has COVID-19 and as such, will not be returning to the competition. But she is invited to win Season 3. With the tragic news out of the way, Ru invited the three person brit Crew to entertain the girls in giant animal outfits. Wait, no, psych – it is the three eliminated queens, who have returned to plead their case to replace Veronica in the competition. Joe simply asked the queens to give her the chance to show a little bit more, Cherry reminded everyone she is a nurse and worked through the pandemic and come on, she deserves it for that alone. Oh and Asttina shared that she has evolved – and looked even sexier, somehow – which TBH, should scare the queens. Ultimately Ellie, Tia, Sister Sister, Lawrence and Tayce all voted to give Joe another shot in the competition while A’Whora and Bimini weren’t scared, voting for Asttina return.

At least they got gift bags, no? But honestly, not one person voted for the iconic, gorgeous frontline worker?! After the year she just had – how rude!

With the new top eight set in stone, Ru announced that for this week’s Maxi Challenge she would pit the queens against each other in two girl groups at RuRuVision, writing and recording their own lyrics to UK, Hun? and perform it live on the mainstage, complete with choreography. As the returning queen, Joe Black was named one of the team captains with Lawrence handed the other given she won the last challenge. Joe quickly snatched up Tia, Sister and Ellie Diamond while Lawrence snagged Bimini and Tayce, with A’Whora joining them by default. Much to her absolute disgust and disappointment.

The groups quickly split up, with Team Joe thrilled by her selections and the queens confident they will win. Meanwhile Bimini was feeling her oats on the other couches and ugh, this is going to be good. We flipped back to Joe’s Team who selected the name Bananadrama, while A’Whora suggested the name United Kingdolls for Team Lawrence, which is correct in every way. Team Joe spoke about potential outfits, with Joe nervous about not really having anything ‘young’ enough for a girl group. Meanwhile the United Kingdolls were laughing about the other team, while Bananadrama felt they were ignoring the fact the challenge requires a high level of camp rather than looking like a girl group.

That being said, the Frock Destroyers would like a word.

Ru returned to chat to the queens, with Tia sharing that finding out that Veronica won’t be returning shook her, however the break was long enough to make her believe in herself rather than needing her friend’s support. Joe meanwhile was excited to get another chance to shine, Ellie was confident in her singing and dancing ability and more importantly, was confident in Sister’s new teeth. Despite any growing pains settling in with their new size. Meanwhile Ru loved the name United Kingdolls, though seemed nervous about A’Whora’s lack of singing ability. Though Tayce was confident in their diversity as a team and was sure that not being a one note group would carry them to victory.

Bananadrama were first up to record the track with MNEK on the mainstage, with Sister nervous about dropping the lyrics with her new teeth. Though she knocked it out of the park, as did Ellie living her Miley best life. Joe was less confident, though was camp and charming and you know, if Toto can add extra syllables to lines so can Joe. See-gar, or sig-ar, be damned. Oh and Tia slayed her rap. A’Whora was up first for the United Kingdolls, giving demented, hilarious, erotic energy and I live. Bimini was doing unintentional key changes before MNEK reminded her to inject Bimini, which she knocked out of the park when she did. Tayce’s lyrics were fire, as was her energy and ugh, I’m getting goosebumps. Will this challenge be as iconic as last season’s? Please. Lawrence started out nervous, bland and slow. But I have a feeling this is another fake out, right?

Team Joe got to work on their choreography with Ellie and Tia taking the lead, eventually butting heads given Ellie was trying to go creative while Tia was trying to keep it simple enough for Joe who admitted to not being able to dance. Tayce and Bimini meanwhile led the other team, not caring about Lawrence’s nerves giving them creative choreography and repeating the affirmation that Lawrence can and will get it. Though Tayce did admit it was less affirmation and potentially more of a threat.

Elimination Day arrived with Bimini and Lawrence bonding while painting their faces, talking about how difficult it was to survive throughout the pandemic. Bimini shared that she felt very insecure, knowing her career could fall over so quickly and that is something she is still processing. Lawrence shared that she is a stress eater and being stuck at home made the entire situation kind of snowball on top of her. A’Whora and Tayce were chatting about feeling like this is the first week again, not wanting to go home and to show that they’ve used the last seven months to apply the judges’ feedback.

MNEK joined Ru, Michelle and Graham on the mainstage for the RuRuVision finals with the United Kingdolls first up and yes, it was a fake-out edit with Lawrence as the girls absolutely slayed. Lawrence was perky and hilarious, A’Whora was all sex, Bimini served demented Spice Girl in the absolute best way and well Tayce was kinda, sorta the Beyonce, no? Well, until Bimini did the splits off a stool. Bananadrama had a tough act to follow but arrived full of energy, Joe was a camp delight, Sister Sister was a star, Ellie was a slutty schoolgirl and Tia was her usual wacky, delight.

On the A Day at the Seaside runway, Bimini was a glamourous, polished delight in sea blue. Tayce was stunning in nets and shells, A’Whora gave us a literally saucy bag of chips, in the best way possible while Lawrence was a glamorous buoy. Meanwhile Ellie was the sexiest seagull I’ve ever seen, no doubt flooding Plucka Duck’s basement. Tia was a sexy soft-serve, upping the runway game from the last look of filming while Sister was also a bag of chips, this time with a seagull going in for the kills. The winner of the runway however was Joe, a windswept mess covered in ice cream or bird shit.

Ultimately the United Kingdolls took out victory, handing all four queens a RuPeter badge and leaving the other group onstage to receive their critiques. The judges felt Ellie’s performance was a little bit flat, however they felt that her runway proved that she is willing to go all out and that they ultimately lived for her. Tia’s lyrics received universal praise for her lyrics and performance, though was read for still not knowing how to dress her body. This led to Ru reading her for filth and encouraging her to actually apply the critiques. Sister was praised for pushing herself in the performance, though they felt her bag of chips was the weaker of the two. Joe was read for not really being part of the group in the performance, despite it being hilarious. And then the judges lived for her runway. Though they hated on her outfit in the performance, leading to Ru going on an epic rant against the queens wearing off the rack. To quote her, “fuck H&M.” And I live.

Backstage the United Kingdolls were thrilled by their victory, congratulating each other on a job well done. Particularly A’Whora who they labelled the best bag of chips, leading to A’Whora flipping out about Sister actually copying the look in the break. The bottom queens arrived and turned the focus to Ru’s tantrum, with Joe and Tia sharing how they were read for absolute filth. Tayce quickly threw it back to the battle of the chips, leading to an epic blow up between the queens with Sister particularly hurt that her creativity was under attack.

The queens returned to the mainstage, with Ru apologising for going in on the girls and reminding them that now, more than ever, they need to seize their moment and be the stars that they are. Plus, she is still working through cabin fever. Ellie was the first to be sent to safety from her group, with Sister soon following, leaving Tia and Joe to lip sync for their life. And damn, did they redeem Don’t Leave Me This Way after Mimi’s murder, Joe perfectly leaning into her spookiness while Tia showed skin, served flips and straight up refused to be sent out of the competition after just returning, pumping that performance with all the passion she could muster, unsuccessful flips be damned.

As such, that left poor Joe Black to once again exit the competition as the first boot of another filming block.

Despite technically becoming the Francesca Hogi of Drag Race UK, Joe is an absolute icon and like Kelly Mantle and Vivacious before her, sometimes an icon just isn’t meant for a competition. Particularly if their idea of staying young is rocking some H&FuckingM. Once again, I pulled her in for a hug and reiterated how much I loved her, this time explaining that another rapid exit is both hilarious and memorable and as such, I was willing to dish out a fresh dish of Chorizjoe Blacroquettes.

Spicy, carby and oh so comforting, these are the perfect way to dull the pain of some repetitive eliminations. Plus, the world remains on fire so all we have left are easy, comforting meals to keep us afloat.

Enjoy!

Chorizjoe Blacroquettes
Serves: 6.

Ingredients
2 chorizo sausages, roughly diced
100g butter
⅔ cup flour, plus extra for dredging
1 ½ cups milk
small handful parsley, roughly chopped
3 garlic cloves, minced
1 tsp chilli flakes
2 eggs, lightly whisked
2 ¼ cups breadcrumbs
vegetable oil, to deep-fry

Method
Fry the chorizo in a medium-high pan until nice and crisp. Drain on a plate lined with paper towel and allow to cool slightly.

Place the butter in a saucepan over medium heat and melt until foamy before whisking in the flour and cooking for a couple of minutes. Remove from the heat and whisk in the milk before returning to the heat and cooking for a couple of minutes or until thickened. Fold through the chorizo, parsley, garlic and chilli, and season well with pepper. Transfer to a container and allow to cool before covering and popping in the fridge for a few hours to firm up.

When you’re ready to rock, pop the extra flour in a bowl, the egg in another and you guessed it, the breadcrumbs in a third. Using wet hands, grab 2 tablespoons of the mixture and roll into a small, fat sausage. Roll in the flour, followed by the egg and finally in the breadcrumbs before transferring to a lined baking sheet. Repeat the process until the mixture is all gone.

To cook, place about 10cm of oil in a large saucepan and once hot, fry the croquettes for a couple of minutes each side or until golden and cooked through. Repeat the process until done. Then, devouring greedily.


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Ginny Lemon Tart

Baking, Dessert, RuPaul's Drag Race UK, RuPaul’s Drag Race UK 2, Snack, Sweets, TV, TV Recap

Previously on RuPaul’s Drag Race UK, the queens were split into duos and while everyone was thrilled to work with their bestie, Ru gagged them with the fact they would actually be forced to battle against them. In the ultimate who wore it best. While some people lucked out to be partnered with weaker fashion queens, Tayce and Ellie were unluckily in the bottom five due to how strong A’Whora and Lawrence were, as the latter took out her first challenge of the season. Ginny meanwhile took up the judges’ challenge to go sexy, while Tia bombed and Asttina was read for being basic. As the latter two lip synced for their lives, Tia pulled out all the stops and saved herself, booting Asttina from the competition.

The queens returned to the Werk Room with the girls still shell shocked by Asttina’s departure from the competition. Particularly A’Whora, who was mainly concerned that she was eliminated by none other than her nemesis Baroness Basic. Meanwhile Tia was hoping to use the moment to remind herself that she is a sickening performer, given she survived against such formidable competition. Ginny grew tired of Lawrence Chaney constantly talking and interjecting in their support of Asttina, telling her to shut up and leading to some awkward fighting. Add to that A’Whora joking about being ready to wash Tia’s message off the mirror and ugh, the girls are ready to fight. Not necessarily in the competitive way.

Tensions appeared to have died down the next day as Ginny led the queens in congratulating Lawrence on her first victory. Tayce spoke about being shocked that Tia survived over her bestie Asttina, leading to more drama, as Veronica stepped in to defend her friend, reminding everyone that Tia did step it up. In the lip sync, which is why she is still here. A’Whora then interjected, encouraging Tia and saying that she has noticed growth since the start of the competition but given Tia doesn’t really care for her opinion, it was clear it meant nothing.

Is this some COVID related stress coming through? Because it. Is. Tense. SO tense.

They were thankfully interrupted by Ru and the Brit Crew, who wheeled in a table full of cakes. And baked goods too, which the queens needed to promote as their own goodies. Tia kicked things off listing acronyms and lusting after Ru, crawling across the floor selling sex. Ellie was awkward in the most charming way possible, Bimini was hilariously aggressive about Brexit, Ginny was a smutty delight, Tayce fingered herself with a Vienna Finger, Sister did Carrie, Veronica was demented, on brand and glorious, A’Whora focused on Ginny Lemon and Lawrence, well, she was charming, funny and focused on scat. Rightly so though, Bimini took out victory proving sometimes, smut isn’t always best.

Ru then announced that for this week’s Maxi Challenge, the queens would be hosting their own morning shows appealing to the broadest range of demographics possible. As the victor of the mini challenge, Bimini would be able to select her role while the rest of the queens would fight over the scraps. Oh and to make it all the more difficult, the performance would be live. The queens ventured to the couch to go through the roles, with Bimini electing for the Gen Z party animal co-host opposite Tayce, Ginny was cast as the hippy weather girl, Lawrence and Ellie went with pre-school hosts, A’Whora and Tia decided to work together for once as the Essex girl financial experts, leaving Veronica and Sister to land as goth party planners.

Talk turned to their backgrounds in improv, with Sister concerned about Veronica’s decided lack of experience. Meanwhile A’Whora and Tia vowed to be besties while picking out wigs as Bimini and Tayce immediately tried to find complementary outfits. Ru arrived to chat to the girls, with Ginny feeling very confident about the weather role and urgh, I hope she wins and proves us right. Ru was worried about Sister and Veronica’s ability to sell goth, with the latter explaining she deliberately took the dregs of the roles to show her versatility and damn, please don’t fall flat, Veronica. Ellie made Ru awkward by asking why she doesn’t say her name in a Scottish accent like she does Lawrence and girl, you in danger Pearl. Ru was charmed by Tia and A’Whora’s concept before casually stirring the pot, with the girls admitting to not being close or having the desire to ever interact. 

The girls ventured to set to be coached by TV legend Lorraine Kelly. Wait, no, there was a pep talk and then girls were sent live in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1 …

Bimini and Tayce got things off to a charming, vapid and energetic start as the hosts, with Lorraine particularly proud of Bimini’s attention to detail and her ability to serve lots of funny moments. After the break Veronica and Sister were less prepared making their anti-birthday cake, with Veronica tragically showing her first sign of weakness as Sister tried to bring the funny and cover the fact they were both scared. In that commercial break Lorraine had nothing to say, while poor Veronica immediately commenced beating herself up.

We returned to the hosts who continued to charm before Ellie and Lawrence arrived and ate it up as the Dragony Aunts. Caller Michelle asked how to avoid resting bitch face, with Ellie literally painting a smile on Lawrence’s charming bloody face. No doubt on their way to the win. Tia and A’Whora were up next, hilarious as the most demented branches of Cheryl Hole’s family tree and proving that A’Whora really is there for that crown and ready to prove she is funny as well as gorgeous. Rounding out the show was Ginny who was demented and hilarious as she was pummeled by the weather, even if it was a wee bit confusing for Lorraine and the girls.

Elimination Day rolled around with Sister nervous about being brought down by Veronica’s performance, while the rest of the queens were really happy with what they delivered. A’Whora and Tia were shocked to have slayed together as a duo, while Veronica jumped on board and agreed that she felt like her performance was so bad that it brought down Sister’s performance. This annoyed Lawrence, who was sick of Sister blaming other people every time she fell flat. Before any drama could explode, Ginny reminded them they have a runway to prepare for and as such, they needed to align their chakras and get to bloody work.

She and Sister then kikied while getting ready, with Sister Sister sharing that she always feels like she is holding back and trying to be polite, rather than letting go. Add to that her inner saboteur and she admitted that she is really struggling under the pressure of the competition. Ginny gave her a delightful peptalk and told her to start believing in herself before they hugged and pledged their love for each other. Meanwhile A’Whora and Tia continued to bond over their insecurities, with the former sharing that what goes through her head is always worse than anything she could hear from the judges. A’Whora then admitted to trashing Tia in the last untucked, apologising for what she said before sharing that she has always pushed others away and put people down due to her insecurities and ugh, their bonding session is so sweet and nice with Tia promising that A’Whora has a circle of sisters now. They then both apologised for everything they’ve done and said, hugging and making up.

Again, I love all of the UK queens so damn much.

On the Monster Mash-up runway, Veronica was somehow glamourous as a piggy Medusa, Sister Sister was glorious as a mummy werewolf, Bimini slayed as a demonic Playboy bunny, Tayce was a gorgeous corpse bride vampire while Ginny was a neon, acid delight. Lawrence was a mash-up of horror movie murderers in the best way possible, while Ellie was glorious as a Goblin-Werewolf, Tia was gorgeous as a voodoo Medusa and A’Whora continued to slay the week as a zombie-Elvira doing Cher on vegas. Damn, let’s just say it was a good episode for A’Whora.

Ultimately Veronica, Sister Sister, Bimini, Ginny, Lawrence and A’Whora were deemed the tops and bottoms, while Tayce, Ellie and Tia were sent to kiki backstage. My sweet Veronica was praised for her glorious runway, however was read for absolute filth for her Camden Goth Party Planner as she didn’t go far enough. Veronica agreed that she was in her head, apologising for bringing down Sister. Speaking of Sister, she was read for not standing out and trying to take her moment, though the judges were ok with her outfit though admitted it could have gone further. My dear Bimini received universal praise for her performance and commitment to the character, while Michelle wished that the details were in her runway to take her over the edge.

Ginny was praised for being good at improv, though the judges felt it didn’t go far enough and gave no light and shade. Ru challenged her to take it to the next level, which is something that Michelle thanked her for doing on the runway, despite still feeling she could take it further. The judges once again loved literally everything Lawrence gave them, particularly the fact she is versatile and they never know what to expect from her on the runway. Lastly A’Whora was rightly given universal praise for her killer performance on the morning show and once again the judges loved her outfit, though Michelle wished that she could let herself be uglier.

Backstage the safe queens were thrilled to be such, with Ellie asking who they all felt did the worst with she and Tayce naming Veronica and suggesting she should be the one to go out. As did Tia, after much deliberation about admitting that about her bestie. The tops and bottoms joined them with A’Whora disappointed that her outfit fell flat before Ginny broke down about being called one-note, feeling the judges just don’t get her as she started to just shut down. Sister Sister spoke about how disappointed she was to not actually step up in the challenge when she really needed to, with Veronica encouraging her and saying that the critique was mainly about letting Veronica overpower the scene.

Talk turned to who the safe girls thought should go, with Ellie admitting they unanimously thought it should be Veronica. This obviously upset Veronica, with Tia quickly clarifying that she thought she would be in the bottom but knew she would slay a lip sync. This led to Veronica warning them that they underestimated her once and they really shouldn’t do it again. A’Whora tried to give her a pep talk, pointing out Tia was underestimated and used that to kill the lip sync. Which only upset Veronica more, telling them she knows what to do and is going to serve it, thank you very much.

The queens returned to the runway with Bimini and A’Whora sent to safety, handing Lawrence her second victory of the competition. Ru then gagged Veronica by sending her to safety, leaving besties Sister and Ginny to battle it out in the lip sync to You Keep Me Hanging On by Kim Wilde. Or so we thought. As Ginny promised to be punk, smirking as the song started, walked to the back of the stage and chuckled as they quit the competition. As Sister Sister slayed, serving the lip sync as she desperately tries to keep herself from getting eliminated. Completely unaware that that had already happened. But let’s be honest, it was great to finally see her have her break-out moment, as I love her.

As the judges and Ru laughed away, they saved Sister Sister from elimination while backstage Ginny was laughing it up at refusing to face off against their friend and going out on their own terms. Given Gin was positively feeling their oats, I quickly pulled them in for my final pre-COVID cuddle and congratulated them on showcasing how wonderful a performer they are. While the rest of the girls were hearing the siren announcing that they too would be heading home to wait out the pandemic, Gin and I laughed it up as we smashed a Ginny Lemon Tart in honour of a short yet memorable run.

This glorious little number is a classy take on the lemon tart. The herby notes of the gin perfectly cut through the tart of the citrus and sweetness, giving you a delightfully gossy dessert that feels just a little bit posher than usual.

Enjoy!

Ginny Lemon Tart
Serves: 12.

Ingredients
260g salted butter, at room temperature
450g raw caster sugar
8 eggs
500g flour
60ml gin
2 lemons, zested and juiced

Method
Preheat the oven to 200C.

Combine the butter with 200g of the sugar in a stand mixer and cream on high speed until just together. Add two of the eggs, and mix again until just combined. Reduce to low and slowly add in the flour and mix until it just comes together. Transfer to a floured service and lightly work into a ball.

Roll the pastry until a few millimetres and press into a large perforated tart tin. Pop the tin on a baking sheet and transfer to the freezer to chill for five minutes or so. Once the dough has firmed up a bit, prick the base of the shell with a fork and then pop in the oven and cook for 15 minutes, or until gloriously golden. Remove from the oven and leave to chill on a wire rack while you get to work on the custard.

Pop the remaining sugar and egg in a saucepan with the gin, zest and juice, and stir until well combined. Place over low heat and stir constantly, cook until it reaches 75C. Strain through some cheesecloth into a jug and remove any bubbles from the top. Gently pour the mixture into the cooled shell and return to the oven to cook for ten minutes, or until the centre of the tart is still jiggling. Remove from the oven and allow to cool for about half an hour before transferring to the fridge to set.

And once it is set, devour. In a punk fashion.


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Astdinner Mandrollas

Baking, Bread, RuPaul's Drag Race UK, RuPaul’s Drag Race UK 2, TV, TV Recap

Previously on RuPaul’s Drag Race UK the queens sang for their lives in Rats! the Rusical. As is becoming tradition, Ginny was bonkers, while week one’s victor Asttina was flat, Tia was hilarious and Veronica emerged as a star. Cherry’s nerves got the better of her while Lawrence was able to power through her’s. Ultimately Veronica took out a very, very well deserved win – that runway, swoon – before Cherry and Tayce battled in the most unexpected lip sync to Memory. And oh God, did they serve emotion. While they both had me covered in goosebumps, one of them had to go as Cherry exited the competition.

The queens ventured backstage, praising Cherry and the emotion of the lip sync, which was so emotive Tayce vowed to never lip sync again. And to not go anywhere. Sister and A’Whora got the group talking on the overwhelming emotions of the day, with A’Whora softening and talking about how you never know what someone else is struggling with and how it is starting to throw her. Tia meanwhile was just thrilled to be whittling down the girls and making it one step further. Finally the queens praised Veronica on slaying the challenge, with her admitting that she is glad she spoke up because if she didn’t, she may have been the one going home. Meanwhile Ellie shared that she now has her eyes on Veronica and vowed to take her out.

We then got a montage of Ellie, Lawrence and Tayce talking about how this will be their week, begging the question, are they our top or bottom three tonight?

The queens returned to the Werk Room the next day, congratulating themselves on making the top ten before they were quickly interrupted by Ru for this week’s mini challenge to go as low as possible. In a quick drag carnivale, limbo battle to the sounds of Jodie Harsh. Soooo, there was not much actual limbo going on, particularly for Ginny who just walked right under it. But then Ru started to lower the bar and while Lawrence was hilarious, Ellie showed full bush, Tia was demented and Bimini looked like a showgirl, Asttina could actually limbo. Until she couldn’t, handing joint victory to Tayce and Veronica.

Despite normally being granted some sort of power, everyone was a winner in the end as Ru told the queens to pair up with their best judy for the next Maxi Challenge. Sister Sister and Ginny Lemon got together, Veronica went with Tia, Tayce and A’Whora continued their blossoming romance, Asttina and Bimini aligned while the Scots, Lawrence and Ellie, banded together. They then learnt that they would be competing against their partner, to design the best outfit out of matching coloured boxes. Oh and then we learnt that Veronica and Tayce did win an advantage, that being the power to divide the colours amongst the queens. Against Michelle’s preference, Veronica snatched green, Tayce gave herself and A’Whora black, Veronica gave pink to Ginny and Sister while Tayce gave blue to Asttina and Bimini, leaving gold for Lawrence and Ellie.

The duos disappeared to de-drag and prepare, with A’Whora very confident in her skills, given she went to the leading design school in the country. Sister too was feeling confident, given she has fun with her sewing machine. Her partner Ginny however wasn’t as thrilled, given her skills go as far making a pillowcase. As everyone delved into their boxes, the were delighted to discover a bunch of sequinseses, sparkles, pleathers and TBH, this is a very fair challenge. Sister was semi-erect at the thought of going against Coco Chanel’s advice and throwing everything at her outfit until it looks presentable. Ellie meanwhile was worried about how she would narrow down what fabric to use while Lawrence hoped to snag a win by leaning on her costume making experience, since she has been doing it since she was a wee lass of ten.

Tia meanwhile acknowledged that she is that queen that doesn’t know how to sew, while Veronica was quickly sketching up another glorious gown. Tayce too was on struggle street as A’Whora continued to go against her delightful villain instincts, giving her a pep talk and some advice on how to test out her designs.

Ru made his return to chat to the queens, with Ginny and Sister both committing to stick with their brands while Ru tried to get Ginny to step out of her comfort zone and serve sexy. Which she vowed to do, for Ru. Bimini and Asttina on the flipside were planning to serve body, with the latter going anime school girl realness. While Bimini was planning to go as a well dressed stripper. Minus balloons, as Ru advised. Lawrence and Ellie meanwhile were super confident, before talk turned to how little girls are paid in Scotland and the sexual tension between A’Whora and Tayce. So, tackling all the important issues really. Veronica continued to be super happy and confident, while Tia continued to be confident in the fact nobody expects her to look good and as such, can only impress. Despite having zero sewing skills. Finally Ru dropped by the burgeoning lovers, with A’Whora going full fashion while Tayce was sticking to her jacket gown. And questioned whether Lawrence would know sexual tension if it punched her in the face.

After Ru dropped the bomb that there would only be tops and bottoms this week, Veronica started to spiral about potentially sending her bestie home. With Tia telling her to get over it and do what she does best because they will always be friends. And gah, I love them. Not fearing going home, however, was Asttina who was very confident in her anime look and was swanning about the Werk Room and given they keep showing it, I am worried for her safety tonight.

We returned to Sister and Ginny chatting about how happy they are with their box before Ginny opened up about her drag character’s penchant for yellow, given it is the non-binary colour. They then had a beautiful conversation about Ginny’s journey to knowing and loving herself, and ugh, I wish Ginny saw what everyone else sees in her. Bimini dropped by to make sure she was ok, bonding over their experience of being non-binary, allowing Ginny to share more about their difficult upbringing and Bimini giving her a much needed pep talk and a big old bom-boulash-hug.

As everyone else continued to work on their outfits, to varying levels of success, Tayce made a sleeve. Until she realised she hadn’t, given there were no openings. Thankfully A’Whora continued her Miss Congeniality campaign and stepped in to save the day. Veronica meanwhile was powering ahead before getting distracted by Tia who completely scrapped her plans and decided to start again with a completely new concept. Which is a bit eeeek for my liking.

Elimination Day rolled around with Asttina still feeling super confident, given some of the other girls’ looks were a total mess. She then decided her look was pretty perfect and as such, was just going to stop there while Bimini suggested that maybe she should embellish it. Sister Sister meanwhile was helping Ginny sex it up with some padding as A’Whora shared that she was overwhelmed by the pressure given she was blacklisted from the design industry because she is a drag queen. Tayce on the flipside was living for her pinned together garment, given she found a loophole to the challenge.

Oh and Tia, well, um, she is just ready to lip sync as she knows it is coming.

On the mainstage, Ru, Michelle and Graham were joined by the gorgeous Jourdan Dunn before the duos got to work. Tayce completely sold her architectural Malificent number but proved no match for A’Whora’s head to toe puffy delight. Ginny was hilariously glam as a suburban sexpot while Sister slayed in a tonal ruched number. Veronica was well put together though got lucky to be facing off against Tia, who looked far better than she gave herself credit for. Asttina looked good, albeit very basic while Bimini was stunning in a full fashion moment, serving a tonne of arse. Ellie was glorious in gold while Lawrence stunned in a dramatic gown.

Ultimately A’Whora, Sister Sister, Veronica, Bimini and Lawrence were the winners of each duo, though I’d argue Ellie easily could have won. Which is exactly what her partner did, claiming her first victory of the season. And a glorious RuPeter badge. With that the tops left – a sentence I always hate writing – leaving the bottoms to be critiqued, with the judges praising Tayce for looking stunning and essentially said, she is only here because someone from each pair had to be.They lived for Ginny’s sexpot persona and her ability to put herself into the look, despite the details kind of lacking. Ginny then shared that she struggles with all the compliments she is receiving in the competition, given she has always been made to feel worthless and urgh, I just want to hug her.

Tia meanwhile got to work charming the judges, knowing that is the only way she can save herself. Michelle praised her for having a perfectly beat face before Ru and Jourdan suggested she should be a model, leading to her breaking down about not feeling beautiful like Tayce. Asttina was read for being basic and mixing her influences, with the judges unsure what the point of her outfit is. She too started to break down after Ru suggested she is better than that outfit, sharing that she joined the competition to challenge herself and she hates letting them down. And Ellie? Well the judges thought she was stunning and only landed here because some had to.

Backstage the winners praised Lawrence on her first victory, while Lawrence admitted that she was shocked to win against someone as talented as A’Whora. A’Whora then started to get down on herself, with Veronica suggesting that she could have won if she didn’t focus on pulling together Tayce’s look for her too. Veronica continued to be shady, asking who they think will land in the bottom with the queens all agreeing Tia. And A’Whora going one step further and full-blown willing her out of the competition, given she is bored of her and is sick of sickening people leaving over her.

This irked Veronica who yelled at her for being mean about Tia and saying that she is sickening and deserves to be here. Right on cue, the bottoms arrived with Tia in tears over continuing to get in her own way in the competition. She then shared that she feels like people are just waiting for her to go home. Bimini encouraged her to keep going and get out of her head before talk turned to Ginny’s sexy look, which some girls loved and Tayce hated. Asttina was disappointed to have missed the mark, though vowed to turn it out if she lands in the bottom two. Filling Tia with even more fear.

The queens returned to the mainstage with Tayce and Ellie quickly joining the tops in safety before Ginny was saved by her willingness to take a risk but stay on brand (and deliver some design, in the design challenge). Leaving Asttina to put her money where her mouth is with a terrified Tia to Dua Lipa’s Don’t Start Now. And oh girl, did they fight. Asttina literally kicked things off, flipping around the stage and selling the song while Tia lent into her comedy skills, having the judges in stitches from start to finish. They then finished with a bit of a duet and ugh, I don’t want either of them to go. But sadly someone has to, as Ru gagged everyone, saving Tia and sending Asttina from the competition as she praised Tia on slaying the performance as the queens and Jourdan all sobbed.

Backstage Asttina was well and truly heartbroken to have been eliminated from the competition, though was grateful she at least had a moment to shine in week one. Controversial jackets be damned. With that we laughed and hugged each other – something we’d soon be questioning as the pandemic started to spread – as we toasted her success the only way I know how. By filling my gob with pillowy buns, in the form of some Astdinner Mandrollas.

Dinner rolls are arguably the only reason to venture to a large scale event or a buffet. Soft, fluffy bread covered in a delicately golden crust, these baby rolls are the perfect size for tricking your brain into the fact you’ve eaten less than you have. While also acting as a perfect butter receptacle.

Enjoy!

Astdinner Mandrollas

Serves: 2 dear, zaddy friends.

Ingredients
1 cup milk, warmed to about 42C.
7g dried yeast
2 tbsp raw caster sugar, divided
1 large egg
60g unsalted butter, cut into cubes and left to soften at room temp
1 tsp kosher salt
400g bread flour

Method
To prepare the dough, whisk the milk, yeast and half the sugar in the bowl of a stand mixer and leave to get frothy for about five minutes. Using the dough hook attachment, mix in the remaining sugar, egg, butter, salt and half the flour by hand. Pop the hook into the mixer and beat on medium until it comes together in a ball. If it is too wet, add more flour ¼ of a cup at a time until you have a soft, easy to manage dough. Not too sticky, not too dry and well, I know you can find the right balance for you.

Once the consistency is right, need for a further couple of minutes before transferring to a lightly oiled bowl, cover with cling and leave to prove for a couple of hours, or until doubled in size.

Punch back the dough and divide into 16 portions. Shape into dinner rolls formation and pop on a lined baking sheet, leaving plenty of room for additional rising. Once done, cover with cling and leave for said rise for a further hour.

Preheat the oven to 180C.

Once proved, pop the rolls in the oven to bake for about 20 minutes, or until lightly golden and puffed. Then serve still warmed, slathered in glorious butter.


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Chicken & Cherry Ballotine

Main, Poultry, RuPaul's Drag Race UK, RuPaul’s Drag Race UK 2, TV, TV Recap

Previously on RuPaul’s Drag Race UK 12 new queens arrived in jolly old London town to see if they could live up to my hype after the epic first season. Immediately thrust into a Wimbledon inspired photo shoot, Lawrence brought a stunning mess to the pic and took out the first victory of the season. Meanwhile on the mainstage the queens were tasked with two looks inspired by their UK gay icon and one proving why they’re the icon of their hometowns. Despite controversially rocking ASOS, Asttina took out the first victory victory while Joe Black was read for filth for not hitting her references and Bimini for being sloppy. But in the lip sync, she was anything but as she stole the show and saved herself sending the iconic Joe out of the competition.

The queens returned to the Werk Room with Bimini shell-shocked by the experience while my sweet Veronica just could not comprehend that someone as iconic and famous as Joe Black was eliminated first. Lawrence meanwhile was just processing the fact that the competition really can flip on its head in the matter of minutes, though did caution that maybe Bimini should pop on some undies. Speaking of Bimini, after scrubbing the mirror clean, as is their duty, they begged the girls to escort them to the couch so they could finally whip off their shoes. 

Sister Sister warned the girls that they have no idea how it actually feels to be in the bottom, while Lawrence continued to work her way further into my heart by telling them that they have no idea how it feels to top either. While they all laughed, Bimini wanted some drama – preach – and asked who the safe girls thought placed in the top and bottom. While Cherry got awkward, A’Whora was more than happy to share that everyone sans Lemon really thought Asttina should have been in the bottom thanks to her ASOS jacket. This led to Asttina pointing out she won and as such, it doesn’t matter what anyone thinks and they all just need to step their pussies up. Leaving Tia to rightly suggest they de-drag and go home.

Oh and Lemon tried on Bimini’s outfit which is iconic but not relevant in the slightest. I just love them both.

The next day tensions had returned to normal with Asttina proudly rocking the first badge of the season. Veronica mentioned that she was missing Joe already – bless nerdy boy Veronica, I love him so – before Lawrence admitted that Joe left her some nails as she didn’t really have enough to last the competition. This led to some killer banter between her and Lemon and ugh, the UK girls just have so much charm, wit and talent – I love them all! Cherry asked Tia if she was going to step up her runways now, with Tia admitting that she got her three shit ones out of the way so they all best get ready to be dominated. Oh and to us, she still doesn’t know how to read A’Whora.

Oh and I did not recognise Ellie out of drag and was V confused where that person had come from. Again, not relevant but thought you should know.

Ru arrived to put the queens to test in this week’s mini challenge where they would be required to ride the pole. By casting their vote for their drag cabinet for Secretary of Shade, Trade Minister (aka the hottest), Leader of the House of Lording It up (aka the cockiest) and Baroness Basic before stuffing the Pit Crew’s ballot box. With their votes, obviously – this is the BBC after all. After Ru tabulated the votes, the cabinet was announced with A’Whora elected as Secretary of Shade, Tayce won Trade Minister – Asttina was robbed – Lawrence Chaney won Leader of the House of Lording it Up and Baroness Basic went to Tia Kofi. Obviously.

Oh and then Ru announced that for this week’s Maxi Challenge they’ll be singing and performing live – Charlie was right – in the debut performance of Rats: The Rusical. With only Michelle to help get their vocals over the line. Oh and then Tia was given the power to cast the show, given she was called basic and damn, this is going to be fun. Wait, no, Tia just wants it to be good and isn’t going to ruin it for anyone else. Sigh.

Veronica was feeling her singing oats, Asttina too was confident while Veronica and Cherry fought it out for the lead role Evita, with Veronica ultimately getting it, given it is the harder role and Tia wants to look after the less confident Cherry. Tia asked Lawrence why she was being so quiet, with Lawrence admitting to straight up being terrified given singing and dancing are not her gig. A’Whora was ultimately given the villain – which tracks –  while Bimini requested the non-singing role paired with it. The hoodrat parts went to Tayce and Ellie, after the latter was forced to audition for Tia. Sister, Cherry and Lawrence meanwhile formed a trio, with Sister not caring enough to fight being cast as the Rat Pack extras and Lawrence continuing to spiral with nerves. Leaving Tia the show stopping cameo for herself.

On the mainstage the queens met with Michelle and her vocal coach Dane Chalfin, with Sister, Cherry and Lawrence clearly nervous. A’Whora and was told she was holding back while Bimini was firing on all cylinders. Veronica quickly shut up everyone that doubted her while Asttina was lost next to her. Ginny rocked it as Judy Stench, while Tia was cautioned that by going the route of giving herself the smaller role she really needs to nail it and steal the show. And finally, Tayce and Ellie were both called out for being difficult to understand.

Michelle and Dane exited leaving Jay Revell and Kieran Daley Ward to get the girls up to speed with their choreo. Immediately flooding Ginny’s basement. Once again Bimini was super confident, while A’Whora just couldn’t rough it up for the role. Tayce and Ellie slayed, Veronica and Asttina worked well together, though Veronica was starting to get in her head that she really needs to win. Which may not end well. Ginny and Tia forgot their lines while Lawrence just wanted to slink into the background as she struggled and poor Cherry just wanted Lawrence and Sister to get it together so they can work through what they need to do. Lawrence started to break down, sharing that she is struggling to be this far out of her comfort zone while the rest of the girls tried to rally around her. It was relatable and sweet, so I’m obviously not going to be shady about it.

Elimination Day arrived with everyone full of energy as they got into rat drag, except for Lawrence who continued to get more and more nervous. On the other end of the spectrum, Tayce and A’Whora were busy flirting it up and alluding to their past time together. Cherry and Sister spoke about how happy the are to have each other in the competition, with Cherry sharing that she grew up as a traveller and how that contradicts with being gay. Despite the fact all the women in his family are camp as hell, the men, however, are all super butch. She spoke about struggling to be proud of being gay and share emotions and well, it was just a really nice wholesome bonding moment and again, I love them all.

On the mainstage Ru, Michelle and Alan were joined by Sheridan Smith for the premiere of Rats: The Rusical which opened with a flush. Literally. Veronica had a fire from her very first note, Ginny was hilarious, Lawrence continued to struggle with her nerves and Bimini was delightfully bonkers. Tayce and Ellie missed a cue, but managed to end their duet strongly. Lawrence warmed up throughout the show and leaned into her comedy, Sister was demented and Cherry kinda go lost, despite nailing rehearsal. Bimini owned her duet, despite A’Whora warming into the role. Attina was well and truly overshadowed by Veronica which is more a compliment to the latter, given Asttina was giving it her all. Oh and Tia’s strategy paid off as she stole the damn show with a killer final number.

On the Surprise, Surprise reveal runway, A’Whora slayed going from groom to bride. Lawrence was a bit awkward going from blueberry to tartan, Ginny was an icon, revealing the EXACT same dress under the first one, just with a bottom window included, giving them the hole nine yards. Cherry was camp and demented, going from yellow puff to pregnant lady. Tia had a killer concept going from leather daddy before slaying as a showgirl or the dancing lady emoji. Ellie went from Scarecrow to Tin Man before offering a third look, as the Cowardly Lion. Asttina Mandela went from death to sexy ninja and damn, my basement is not just flooding but overflowing. Sister Sister was a floral dame before going full dominatrix demon, in the best way. And then Veronica arrived and stole the damn show, going from Stepford Wife to full blown robot. Poor Tayce was next, going from cape to gown to dying in a bodysuit and well, I feel sorry for her following Veronica. Bimini then walked out in a corset with balloons full of paint which was an iconic concept that tragically just failed as hard as Asia and the butterflies. 

Ultimately A’Whora, Ginny, Asttina, Sister Sister and Bimini were deemed safe, leaving the rest to be praised or read for filth. Lawrence sadly was the latter with the judges feeling she was good in the show but needed to get out of her way. And her reveal was quite boring. The judges felt Cherry’s inner saboteur took her down this week and while she was good, she fell flat. The judges lived for everything Tia Kofi did this week except for her showgirl look. Ellie received universal praise for everything she did but well, they clearly loved everything Veronica Green did just that little bit more. I am so proud of her! Oh and Tayce was praised for looking stunning despite being overshadowed in the show and well, very basic on the runway.

Backstage Bimini was thrilled to be safe but heartbroken her reveal didn’t pan out. Ginny spoke about it being so much harder than they expected. The tops and bottoms returned, with Lawrence feeling ok. Sister Sister admitted that she felt Lawrence brought her down this week, with Lawrence getting offended while Sister just wanted to find a way to keep going rather than breaking down. Tayce said the judges felt everything she did was a bit flat while Cherry felt like she was being ignored, despite being in the bottom and clearly emotional. She shared she was scared and wanted to get out of her head. Talk turned to Veronica being quiet and riding under the radar, with her hoping it was a warning shot that she was here for victory. Oh and Tia was thrilled to learn that she is hella basic and congratulated the girls for identifying it earlier.

Ultimately Tia and Ellie were deemed safe, handing Veronica an extremely well-deserved victory before Lawrence’s personality saved her from the bottom two, leaving Cherry and Tayce to battle it out to Memory. And holy shit, while it isn’t exactly the most drag friendly song, the duo serve it, tapping into the emotion and frankly, breaking my heart. Both girls felt every feel however Tayce had light and shade, going from heartbreak to rage, quivering lip and fire in her eyes. Despite Cherry rocking it as a fragile leading lady, it wasn’t enough as Tayce was sent to safety and poor Cherry was sent home. Vowing to fight and never let anyone overlook them ever again.

Backstage I was still COVID naive as I pulled Cherry into a massive hug and reminded her how great she is and how proud of her I am. You see, I first met Cherry a decade or so ago when planning a family member’s traveller wedding (I was meant to appear on a rival reality TV show about these weddings, but D’Andra Simmons got me removed like I was LeeAnne in that defunct show).

But I digress.

I was taken by Cherry’s charm and nervous energy, so I took her under my wing and encouraged her to shine. Yes, ladies and gentleman, I am her drag mother. Thus the pride. But I digress, again. Cherry was thrilled to see me backstage and glad I had a delicious Chicken & Cherry Ballotine waiting to cheer her up again.

The salty prosciutto and tart cherries work harmoniously to create a ballotine that you can’t stop devouring. Particularly when feeling down or if the weather is shit. Or if you are happy. Or you know, whenever – this is just really tasty and super easy.

Enjoy!

Chicken & Cherry Ballotine
Serves: 4-6.

Ingredients
½ cup morello cherries, drained and chopped
¼ cup panko breadcrumbs
1 egg
2 tbsp grated parmesan
2 tsp fresh thyme leaves
1 tsp fresh oregano, roughly chopped
1 tsp chilli flakes
4 garlic cloves, minced
salt and pepper, to taste
8 slices prosciutto
2 chicken breasts, sliced in half to form two thinner fillets

Method
Preheat the oven to 200C.

Combine the cherries, breadcrumbs, egg, parmesan, thyme, oregano, garlic and chilli with a good whack of salt and pepper.

Meanwhile line the prosciutto on a piece of cling, with the long sides overlapping. Place the chicken breast pieces over the top, before forming the stuffing into a sausage and placing in the middle. Roll the chicken into a sausage, using the prosciutto to seal it in.

Place seam side down on a lined baking sheet and transfer to the oven to bake for half an hour, or until the chicken is cooked through and the prosciutto crispy. Leave to rest for ten minutes, before slicing into discs and serving with a generous heaping of mash.


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Joe Black Olive Tapenade

Condiment, Dip, RuPaul's Drag Race UK, RuPaul’s Drag Race UK 2, Sauce, TV, TV Recap

Previously on RuPaul’s Drag Race UK the inaugural batch of queens well and truly knocked it out of the park, slaying the competition from start to finish. And, in my not-humble opinion, served up the best season of Drag Race since All Stars 2. Let’s just take time to remember the highlights – Scaredy Kat shat out her own head, Michelle thought The Vivienne was rocking a fake nose, much betta, the combination of Trump and Thatcher in Snatch Game, Frock Destroyers storming the charts, Sum Ting’s stamp look, Crystal grinding her garment, hodge podge, Gothy’s rawr, Cheryl’s iconic bottom spree and yes, yes, I know it was part of the Frock Destroyers, but DDC’s epic whistle tones.

While The Vivienne rightly took the crown, the entire cast won my heart. Meaning these new girls are either going to blow me away or … nope, good vibes only – they are going to blow us away. I can feel it in my Maxine Waters, by way of Monique Heart.

The parade of new queens kicked off with Scotland’s own Lawrence Chaney in all technicolour wonder, as iconic as the Loch Ness monster. She then likened herself to Susan Boyle and well, that’s enough to love her. Cherry Valentine almost knocked herself out as her headpiece smacked the doorway on her way in. Thankfully she slayed her second try and I love her and how funny she found her fuck-up. She has only done drag for 12 months and it is one of three jobs, including mental health nurse and she is the BEST. Tia Kofi was up next in cheetah glory and doesn’t care how she looks, she just wants to slay with the performances. They were joined by Bimini Bon Boulash in full Barbarella realness.

Oh and she is a vegan, which we were reminded of multiple times. Oh and she describes herself as super slutty and I love her. As did Lawrence, as she quickly adopted her.

Ginny Lemon was up next and was camp, crazy and full neon yellow and I love her and she needs to win. She is wacky, OTT and well, I think she and Baga would be best friends. Ellie Diamond was up next serving pastel pink babydoll realness, with Lawrence heartbroken to share the title of first Scottish queen in the competition. Oh and she makes everything she wears despite being a baby and I live. Could she be the UK Trixie? Sister Sister was next and flooded my basement out of drag and was camp, perfectly styled and I’m so excited for her. Tayce was next on the scene serving supermodel realness and given she lives for Cruella de Vil, I live for her like Ginny lives for her accent.

Next was Joe Black, clocking herself for being the second coming of Glenn Close before I had the chance and instantly, she has become my favourite. They were joined by Veronica Green who described herself as Goolum to glamourous and well, now she is my favourite. She is a super nerd out of drag – in a v hot way – and is stunning in and I need her to succeed at everything given she is so delightful. Next was Asttina Mandella serving tailored glamour before throwing down, telling everyone that she is the best dancer and can turn a lip sync. Rounding out the cast is A’Whora serving slutty Dorothy realness and I live for her look, despite Tia alluding to the fact that she is not well liked among the queens on the scene.

Their jubilant celebrations about making the cut were interrupted by Ru who arrived to announce that the first mini challenge of the season would see the girls pose in a glorious Wimbledon inspired photoshoot, serving Wimbled-hun realness. With the new and improved Pit Crew, much to the delight of sweet Veronica.

Lawrence was hoping to turn her lack of athletic prowess into a total serve, which she did, given her charm and penchant for the f-bomb. Tayce went full model eleganza, Bimini was a neon, slutty dream, Joe Black proved turbans are like hats by keeping hers on, Cherry Valentine was a smutty, moaning icon, Ellie Diamond begged for the balls and sold me on the fact she is Pearl and Trixie’s love child.

Ginny was an absolute bonkers delight, Asttina cared only about the photo and well, it turned out amazing, so it paid off. Veronica Green continued to work her way further into my heart and I want to adopt her because she is the damn sweetest. Sister Sister served Heathers realness, A’Whora was an ‘80s workout dream, Tia Kofi deserved the win for catching tennis balls in her wig before directing the Brit Crew to elevate her. Despite a dozen strong performances, it was Lawrence Chaney that ultimately took out victory. Looking an absolute mess, in her own words.

Before Ru departed he announced that for this week’s Maxi Challenge the queens would need to stomp the runway serving UK Gay Icon realness. Oh and then turn a second look, showcasing why they’re the queen of their hometown. With that the girls ran around chaotically to secure a workstation before de-dragging. Much to Tia’s delight. A’Whora quickly fangirled over Joe Black, talking about how much of an icon she is with Joe sharing she applied to challenge herself and show something different about her.

Meanwhile Lawrence still hadn’t taken off her make-up, admitting that she isn’t very confident as a boy and doesn’t feel conventionally beautiful and as such, was scared to show herself to the girls. Thankfully the queens reminded her that she is a charming, fun, beautiful delight and not to be hard on herself. And I love them all.

Elimination Day rolled around with everyone splitting up to get to work on their first looks before Bimini pointed out that Tayce and Asttina had both opted for Naomi Campbell for their UK Gay Icon. Though rather than having a fight, they spoke about the fact they didn’t have many people of colour to look up to growing up and as such, it is a nice statement for both of them to stick with it and hopefully become gay icons for the future generations. Talk turned to the looming elimination, with A’Whora speculating Asttina and Tia will likely be the first and damn, I love when a queen leans into being the villain. It is just such a joyful edge, so let’s hope it stays in this light and shady way.

On the Mainstage Ru, Michelle and Graham were joined by the stunning Elizabeth Hurley and urgh, I love her. For the gay icon runway, Joe Black served David Bowie realness and I loved everything she did. Asttina was glorious and stunning as runway Naomi, Ginny rocked Kate Bush and I love her before Tia Kofi swerved with an Alan Turning look and I love me a nerdy, history queen. Bimini was a sexy, punk Princess Julia, Lawrence honoured my lovely Diana Rigg – may she rest in peace – Cherry was a glorious Freddie Mercury, Veronica was adorable as Boy George in Boy George’s second hand shoes. Despite them not fitting. A’Whore was a messy Vivienne Westwould, Sister Sister was adorably chaste as Dusty Springfield, Ellie Diamond slayed as Lily Savage and Tayce also served as Naomi.

Though I do have to say, Asttina had the better look.

On the hometown runway, Joe Black’s Brighton look was meant to honour the pavilion though I couldn’t really see it. Asttina served East London streetwear – in the best way possible – while Ginny rocked Worcestershire Sauce realness in a mustard suit, Tia was stunning as Robin Hood realness, Bimini was amazing as a slutty football fan, Lawrence was a pop art wonder in ode to stained glasswork, Cherry was smoking as a train. Or a clock, I don’t know. Veronica Green wore a glorious red ball gown, A’Whora also went with Robin Hood realness in a stunning elfen number before Sister slayed as a scouse housewife running errands. And then Ellie Diamond was inspired by Dundee’s Dennis the Menace but looked like the hottest Freddy Kreuger ever, And then Tayce was literally a Welsh Dragon and I live.

Particularly when Liz Hurley quoted AUSTIN POWERS.

Ginny, Tia, Cherry, Veronica, A’Whora and Tayce were quickly deemed safe, leaving the tops and bottoms to find out how they did on their first try. While Joe Black looked stunning, the judges didn’t think that either of her looks were iconic enough to come through. Except for Liz who loves some history. Asttina received universal praise for everything she did and the judges look forward to seeing how she mixes it up next. They loved Bimini’s slutty Norwich look but felt her personality wasn’t coming through. Lawrence was universally beloved by the judges, with Michelle quickly identifying her as the one to watch. Sister’s Dusty look was deemed a little lacklustre and while Graham and Elizabeth loved her hometown look, Michelle thought it should have been bigger. Oh and then Ellie was praised for being beat to the gods and tailoring such glorious outfits.

Backstage Tayce was heartbroken to be safe, though was thrilled to not be in the bottom. A’Whora suggested that the group could have been the tops and bottoms with Tia asking who she would have put in the bottom, with her saying Tia and Asttina should have been in the bottom. Based on only entry looks, because Tia’s hair was thirsty. A’Whora read Asttina for wearing ASOS before Ginny pointed out that they’re just intimidated because she is fierce. The other girls joined them, with Joe talking about how heartbroken she is to be in the bottom and the fact they didn’t get her. The girls were shocked that Asttina was in the top, while Sister was annoyed to be in the bottom. Oh and Bimini was so anxious about lip syncing in ten inch heels, no underwear and arse out.

On the BEEEEEB.

Ultimately Lawrence Chaney was deemed safe as was Ellie Diamond, as Asttina Mandela took out victory – much to A’Whora’s shock, no doubt – while Sister Sister narrowly avoided the bottom two, leaving Joe and Bimini to battle it out to the iconic Relax by Frankie Goes to Hollywood. Both queens slayed the lip sync, getting every damn syllable and being true to their own style. But when Bimini did a headstand and started riding a bike, it was all over. As the sexy queen flooded Liz’s basement and saved herself, sending Joe from the competition.

Poor, poor Joe. While the cabaret legend was positively gutted to exit the competition first, she was thrilled to find her old pal slinking about in the Werk Room. As this little episode was filmed before the pandemic fully put 2020 on ice, I took her into my arms, held her by the face and told her how sickening she is. From about an inch away – isn’t that terrifying to think of doing now?

I first met Joe on the cabaret scene in the early aughts when I was pretending to be the real Sally Bowles. While she and everyone else saw through the very-obvious-in-retrospect lie, she kindly took me under her wing and made sure the others were kind to me. Did our friendship start with me playing the wounded bird act? You betcha, but thankfully the years since have gifted me with one of the most beautiful friendships I could hope for. And as such, I knew the only way to cheer her up was to whip up some Joe Black Olive Tapenade and toast her glorious, tragically short run.

A little bit tart and a whole lot tangy, tapenade may not be everyone’s favourite dip to have but it is a very important part of the classic Italian trio. And I personally love it and its ability to enhance even the most bland recipes. I want to say it is its umami-ness, but I’ve probs misunderstood that flavour because I’m not a masterchef.

Enjoy!

Joe Black Olive Tapenade
Serves: 2.

Ingredients
180g kalamata olives, pitted
1 tbsp capers, drained and rinsed
3 anchovy fillets (I hate them too, but they’re necessary)
2 garlic cloves, minced
½ tsp dried oregano
1 tbsp sherry vinegar
1 tbsp olive oil

Method
Now brace yourself, this one is really going to stress you out so make sure you read to the very end of the recipe before you begin.

Place everything in a food processor or blender and blitz until well combined. Serve immediately with crusty bread or transfer to a steralized jar for later.

Fin.


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Lie back and think of England(‘s true queens)

Guess Who's Coming to Dinner, RuPaul's Drag Race UK, RuPaul’s Drag Race UK 2, TV, TV Recap

Yes, yes – I sound like a broken record, but 2020 really was a complete dumpster fire. And while honestly, 2021 hasn’t really made a strong case for itself yet, the fact that the Ru is giving us not one but two seasons of Drag Race in January gives me hope that it will, like the PSA says, get better.

Much betta, even.

Given how stellar the OG batch of UK queens were for Drag Race UK, I am positively drippin’ for their arrival so they can destroy my frock with another batch of whistle tones, circular saws, sustained mediocrity, hodge podge and most importantly, silver dresses and red wigs.

Join us Sunday for yet another round of culinary comfort with the first boot.

Image source: BBC.


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Minestony Vlachos

Main, Soup, Survivor, Survivor: Winners at War, TV, TV Recap

Previously on Survivor twenty iconic winners were marooned on a sandbank in Fiji, ready for the ultimate battle royale. Well, after Adam fanned out and they toasted the season ahead with some champagne. They returned to camp where they learnt all about the new currency, Fire Tokens, which they could earn throughout the season to buy advantages or luxury items. The catch being, once they were voted out, they had to bequeath them to someone else.

Early in the game, those with obvious connections became targets with Natalie following in Nadiya’s footsteps and being voted out first due to being on a tribe with Jeremy. Amber soon followed as the only Blood vs Water couple, before we tragically went on a run of losing the old schoolers starting with Danni, followed by zaddy Ethan, Tyson and Rob. The latter, for trying to implement the Buddy System with competent players.

We then experienced a tragic double tribal council where Parvati and Sandra exited back-to-back. Coincidentally, the pandemic began the very same day. After arriving at the Edge of Extinction, Sandra knew she had no chance of winning her way back into the game, so opted out of suffering just for a stint on the jury. The darkest timeline then continued with Yul joining his fellow old schoolers on the Edge of Extinction. Despite – or because of – being the first boot, Natalie had accumulated quite the fortune on the Edge, so was able to spend up on an advantage and an idol in the returning challenge. Sadly for her, it didn’t pay off as Tyson won his way back into the merge.

Michele finally got revenge on her ex, Wendell, as the tribe banded together to send him out of the game. After trying to play Probst’s tribal council podium as an idol, Adam was shown the door before everyone was thanked for their service to the franchise with an epic full-family reward. And ugh, it was beautiful. Sadly, the game continued, as Tyson, Sophie and Kim were all tragically felled. Things became a little predictable after that, as Jeremy and Nick went out, as Tony and Sarah solidified their control. 

Natalie went on another spending spree ahead of the final return challenge, with it paying off this time and her joining the new final six. After a near Advantageddon 2.0, Denise was sent to the jury as only she and Sarah were eligible to be booted. Ben then kinda quit/gave Sarah permission to boot him for her resume. After Natalie won the final immunity challenge and took Michele with her to the final tribal council, that sacrifice proved pointless as Tony won his way to the end and Sarah became the final juror.

Despite it being an extremely strong final three, it was clear the jury bonded with Natalie on the Edge and loved Tony’s flashy game, so poor Michele was shut out of the vote. While Natalie’s bonds earned her some votes, it wasn’t enough to follow in Chris’ footsteps as the jury crowned Tony the runaway victory. Making him, officially, the King to Sandra’s Queen. And long may they reign. After receiving him 2 million dollars, I thanked him for learning from his Game Changers and coming out to the island and putting on what was arguably a masterclass. He made moves, he was funny and most importantly, he managed to avoid being voted out despite being the only major target left after the merge. And that alone is worth celebrating with a bowl of Minestony Vlachos.

I know minestrone doesn’t exactly feel like a victory meal, but TBH, I thought the target on Tony’s back would be too big for us to have such an iconic victor, so we just have to accept it. Okay? Plus, this is still delicious, which is always a win, right?

Enjoy!

Minestony Vlachos
Serves: 4.

Ingredients
1 tbsp olive oil
6 rashers streaky bacon, diced
2 carrots, peeled and diced
2 celery sticks, sliced
1 potato, diced
4 garlic cloves, minced
1L beef stock
400g crushed tomatoes
400g red kidney beans, rinsed and drained
1 cup small pasta like shells or macaroni
⅓ cup flat-leaf parsley, roughly chopped
salt and pepper, to taste

Method
Pop the oil in a dutch oven over medium heat and cook the bacon, carrot, celery and potato, stirring frequently, for 10 minutes, or until starting to caramelise. Add the garlic and cook off for a minute before stirring through the stock, tomatoes and kidney beans. Bring to the boil, reduce heat to low and simmer for half an hour.

Once the veggies are tender, bring the heat back to medium and stir in the pasta and cook until al dente. Stir through the parsley and season to taste, before serving piping hot and devouring. Like the King.


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White Chocolate & Raspberry Natalie Anderscone

Baking, Snack, Survivor, Survivor: Winners at War, Sweets, TV, TV Recap

Previously on Survivor Natalie won the final immunity challenge and chose to take Michele to final tribal council with her, forcing Tony and Sarah to battle for the final slot. And while Tony was feeling far from confident, the Survivor Gods had his back as his rope burnt through first and secured his place in the final three. The next day the final three were all proud for making it to the end for different reasons – redemption, to avenge Reem and to cement a legacy – final tribal council didn’t reward them all equally with the icon of the season, Michele, completely shut out of the vote and finishing in third.

But in my outrage, I’ve gotten ahead of myself. Yul kicked things off at the final tribal council by congratulating the trio for getting to the end in such different ways, imploring them to fill in the gaps for everyone. Denise meanwhile asked everyone to talk through their missteps, with Natalie’s weakness was focusing on her strength, rather than making relationships on day one. Michele spoke about building a lot of great one on one alliances, rather than ever building a large controlling alliance. Oh and the fact everyone knew she previously dated Wendell. Tony spoke about learning from his previous season where he wasn’t vulnerable and as such, didn’t have any missteps this time. Nick questioned how he felt bonds don’t burn people, with Tony sharing he only turned on Nick because he tried to turn on Tony first. Meanwhile Tony tried to appeal to Jeremy and their bonding over families, which Natalie called bullshit, leading to Ben trying to defend Tony’s game. Because, Ben.

Adam came in for Natalie, asking her to talk about how she used the Edge of Extinction to her benefit. She admitted that she lied to everyone, calling herself an outcast to try and throw them off. Rob called her out for isolating herself from her fellow pre-mergers, which led to Natalie explaining that she found a lot of advantages and needed to keep them secret to protect herself, which made her withdraw. Parvati praised her for always being honest (to her), before asking Tony to explain how he protected himself despite burning so many people. He then spoke about the evolution of the spy locations, having the jury in hysterics and yeah, this game is done. Congratulations Tony! Wendell turned the attention to Michele, asking her to talk through how she made it to the end despite always being on the bottom before Ben sweetly congratulated her on winning her first season.

Wendell kicked off the Outplay portion asking Natalie to talk through her litany of advantages, where she explained to the jury how she sold Sandra, Jeremy and Sarah their advantages before selling Tony and Nick their disadvantages. Oh and then she dominated the log and coconut challenges, too. She then explained that by putting so many advantages into the game, she felt like she was still a part of it and influenced who made it to the end. Ben directed the conversation to winning challenges, with Tony and Michele talking about their pride in winning six immunities between them. Though Michele pointed out that only surviving another day isn’t all immunity gives you, it gives you the chance to find more cracks.

Rob asked Natalie why she didn’t step in to face off with Tony in the fire challenge, with her explaining that she only wanted to dismantle the Tony-Sarah alliance and not stepping in guaranteed that outcome for her. Ethan asked Tony and Michele to explain how they feel about the Edge of Extinction, with Tony once again having the jury laughing it up about his heartbreak over being extorted. Meanwhile Michele highlighted her bonds and how everyone willed her tokens and sent her advantages, saying they gave her the hope to keep going.

We closed things out with the outlast portion where Natalie spoke about how she only made it to the end by adapting and fought off the Chris Underwood sized target to get to the end. Meanwhile Michele spoke about questioning her last win, given she went to so few tribal councils, contrasting that with this season where she broke the record for surviving the most. Add to that the fact she received so many tokens and advantages, and won challenges, that she was ultimately proud of the game she played. Tony however focused on the fact that he adapted from his previous seasons, talking about needing to lay low during the day and instead did his sly moves at night. He then pointed out that he never received a vote this season and played hard knowing how big this season is and hoped that everyone was proud of his game for such a momentous season.

Danni and Amber congratulated the final three on the game they played, the path they took and how hard they fought in tribal council before Rob led the jury in a standing ovation for them, while Michele’s eyes welled up with some well-earned pride. With that the jury finally voted, Probst lied and said he’d see everyone in L.A. to read the votes before popping up on videoconference while everyone was isolated across America. Or in the case of the final three, all conveniently in New Jersey. With that Probst told them to bring in their families that were isolating with them before getting down to reading the votes from his garage. The first vote was for Tony, followed by two for Natalie and another for Tony. Nat snagged a third, as did Tony, followed by Natalie and then Tony’s fourth … before the rest piled up on Tony and handed him the win.

I quietly popped up behind Natalie and congratulated her on following in Chris’ footsteps and playing such a strong game following her return. Unlike Chris, however, she absolutely dominated – or Reem-ed –  the Edge of Extinction too, and hearing her talk about the influence she managed to have over the game, I can’t help but agree with crowning her runner-up. No matter how strongly I feel about Michele’s game. Plus, she is funny and charming as hell, so more than deserved the second place prize but a full batch of White Chocolate & Raspberry Natalie Anderscones to celebrate.

Do I even need to talk these up? Scones are delicious, white chocolate is delicious and so are raspberries. Throw them all together and you’ve got the makings of a victorious snack. Or, if you eat them in one sitting, full meal.

Enjoy!

White Chocolate & Raspberry Natalie Anderscone
Serves: 8.

Ingredients
2 ½ cups flour
½ tsp salt
¼ cup raw caster sugar
2 ½ tsp baking powder
90g cold unsalted butter, diced
¾ cup double cream, plus more to serve
2 eggs
1 tbsp vanilla extract
150g raspberries
¾ cup white chocolate chips

Method
Preheat the oven to 180C and line a baking sheet.

Combine the flour, salt, sugar and baking powder in a bowl, before massaging the butter through until it resembles wet sand. 

Whisk the cream, eggs and vanilla together in a second bowl, before folding though the dry ingredients until the batter just comes together. Then fold through the white chocolate and raspberries.

Transfer the dough to a floured bench and form into eight equal portions, before placing them on the lined baking sheet, allowing room for them to puff up. Transfer to the oven and cook for about 20 minutes, or until lightly golden before devouring, like a queen.


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Michele Fitzgerkald Chicken Pizza

Main, Pizza, Poultry, Street Food, Survivor, Survivor: Winners at War, TV, TV Recap

Previously on Survivor the final four arrived on the top of a mountain in Fiji for their final immunity challenge. The one that Jeremy won on his way to victory in Second Chances. It came down to a battle of New Jersey before Michele dropped and handed Natalie immunity, guaranteeing an epic run from first boot to final tribal council. Back at camp everyone split up to start practicing fire, with Winchele slaying while Tony and Sarah were both decidedly more nervous. That didn’t matter, however, as Natalie took Winchele through to final tribal with her, forcing Sarah and Tony to face off with the latter surprising with victory. Sending one of my newest faves Sarah to the jury.

The final three awoke on day 39, thrilled to discover their breakfast. We then heard from the finalists one by one, with Michele speaking about how hard it was to get such a backlash against her previous win. She admitted she was proud to prove the haters wrong and show with this game, that she is a good player and didn’t fluke her first victory. Natalie admitted that while her path was non-traditional, she owned the hand that was dealt her, gaming the hell out of the Edge and never giving up. She knew that her only focus was to convince the haters on the jury and prove that she deserves to be there. 

Tony meanwhile planned to highlight how well-rounded his game was and always has been, and as such, knew he needed to convince the people whose dreams he crushed that he deserves victory. That being said, he is feeling pretty confident based on the game he played and the feedback Natalie gave everyone when she returned to the game. And felt like he was hours away from being crowned King to Sandra’s Queen. Which just feels so right, given they are both as chaotic as each other.

We then pivoted to the rain soaked tribal council where the final three were joined by the sixteen person jury – being without Sandra still hurts, I’m not going to lit – where Probst sadly didn’t pivot to the OG structure. And I will pause it there and fast forward a little bit because despite each of the final three playing a strong game, the jury didn’t seem to respect Michele’s stellar game and as such she was completely shut out of the vote. In an extremely undeserving fashion.

Given that pissed me off, I called a break in production and tapped Michele on the shoulder to eat out feelings early. And to apologise. Because I was firmly team Aubry during her original season, however it really had more to do with the fact that I love an underdog. And given how well Michele played from the bottom this season, I will gladly eat humble pie. Actually, I wish I was eating humble pie, because that would mean she would be joining Sandra as the second two-time winner. Instead, I cursed her into being a zero vote finalist by whipping up a Michele Fitzgerkald Chicken Pizza.

Yes, the curse has struck yet again. And I am so sad about it. That being said, as is always the case, this is so delicious it is hard to stay angry. Sweet, spicy and salty, it has it all – just like Winchele’s robbed goddess game.

Enjoy!

Michele Fitzgerkald Chicken Pizza
Serves: 4.

Ingredients
2 bases as per Pizsa Zsa Gabor
½ cup muscovado sugar, plus 1 tablespoon for the chicken seasoning
¼ cup chicken stock
¼ cup ketchup
¼ cup glucose syrup
1 onion, half finely diced and sliced
3 garlic cloves, minced
2 tbsp red wine vinegar
1 tsp lemon juice
½ tsp chilli flakes
¼ tsp dried thyme
¼ tsp dried oregano
½ tsp ground allspice, plus a pinch for the sauce
salt and pepper
½ tsp paprika
½ tsp garlic powder
¼ tsp cayenne pepper
¼ cup olive oil
2 chicken breasts, cut into a small dice
1 red capsicum, sliced
1 yellow capsicum, sliced
1 cup mozzarella cheese, grated
4 rashers streaky bacon, diced
2 shallots, sliced

Method
Combine half a cup of muscovado sugar, the chicken stock, ketchup, glucose syrup, the diced onion, garlic, red wine vinegar, lemon juice, chilli flakes, thyme, oregano and allspice with a good whack of salt and a smaller whack of pepper in a saucepan over medium heat. Bring to a boil, reduce heat to low and simmer for 10 minutes or until glorious and thick. Remove from the heat and allow to cool slightly.

Combine a tablespoon of muscovado sugar, a teaspoon of salt, half a teaspoon of pepper and allspice, with the paprika, garlic powder, cayenne pepper and the oil in a bowl. Toss the chicken to coat and cook in the frying pan over medium heat for five to ten minutes, or until cooked through.

Prep the base as per Zsa Zsa’s instructions and preheat the oven to 200°C.

Roll out the dough and spread with the sauce, then scatter with mozzarella, the capsicums, sliced onion and the spicy chicken. Transfer to the oven to bake for 20 minutes or so, or until golden and bubbling.

While the pizza is cooking, fry the bacon over medium heat, or until golden and crisp.

Remove the pizza from the oven and sprinkle with the bacon and shallots. Before devouring, like the icon you’ve always been.


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Sarah Mozzarellacina Sticks

Cheese, Party Food, Snack, Survivor, Survivor: Winners at War, Tapas, TV, TV Recap, Vegetarian

Previously on Survivor after everyone flushed their idols at the last tribal council, Tony got up in the middle of the night to start his hunt. Sadly for him, the sun came up before he found it, leading the rest of the tribe to join him, where Natalie continued to Chris her return and snatched the idol out from under him. This spooked Ben, Sarah and Tony who worried she had found it, questioning what it would mean if she or Michele won immunity. The trio got lucky, however, as Tony secured his fourth win, moving the target onto Michele. Thankfully her run wasn’t meant to end there, as Ben told Sarah he wouldn’t mind if she voted him out, knowing it makes it that much easier for her to win the fire challenge and gives her a move that is all her own. And while it wasn’t really a move, given she had permission, she joined the girls and sent him to the jury.

We opened straight up at the final immunity challenge, high on a hill in Fiji, which provided an epic backdrop for an epic challenge where they each had to drop balls into a track at various intervals without dropping one at the other end. You know, the final immunity challenge that kicked off our Survivor coverage ten seasons ago. The one where Wentworth broke down in tears after losing Second Chances. And fun fact thanks to Probst, everyone that won this challenge as final immunity has gone on to win the game. So the stakes were just that little bit higher.

That being said, it isn’t great to recap given there is no telling how anyone is going. The final four all made it to three balls, however it was Tony that was the first to drop not long after. The women all made it to four balls which immediately took out Sarah, leaving the iconic Jersey girls to battle it out for immunity. And likely take the other to the end. Queens. Both made it to a record equaling five balls which proved to make it super tough on them, with Natalie saving herself multiple times before Michele dropped, handing Natalie final immunity after becoming the first boot. And honestly, I am so proud – she got Reem’s redemption!

Back at camp Natalie was thrilled to join the Amanda, Sandra, Parvati, Russel and Rob – and Sharn, I guess – club by making it to the final tribal council twice. Meanwhile the other three all dispersed to practice making fire, with Tony struggling and Michele, the icon, quickly building them. By the shore, Natalie was debating who was the best person to take with her to the end and more importantly, who she wanted to add winning the fire making challenge to their resume. While Michele was nervous, she was hopeful that she could win the challenge and more importantly, could claim a huge scalp in front of the jury just before final tribal. Echoing that sentiment, Sarah was hoping to go to the challenge, knowing how much it could do for her game. Plus, Tony is stuck in his head and as such, it may be an easy win for her.

At tribal council Natalie delighted the jury when they saw her wearing immunity, before she spoke about how dreamlike the scenario was, given it was the only thing that kept her going on Extinction. Michele spoke about how Natalie took time out after the challenge, leaving the other three to practice on fire instead which Michele did. Very successfully. Tony and Sarah were also full of bravado, before Sarah started to tear up talking about how she ultimately wants to face off against her ally and take him out, rather than someone else. Michele too wanted to be the one to take out Tony, which Natalie agreed is a big achievement, however she wasn’t willing to leave it to chance. Ultimately Natalie chose for Michele to be the next to join the double final tribal council club, leaving Cops R Us to battle it out for the final slot. And let’s be honest, it feels like the win.

With that Tony and Sarah sat down at the fire making stations and after some light smacktalk, got to work. Natalie and Michele quietly cheered Sarah on from the sidelines, while they both struggled to get a flame. Tony was the first to get fire, quickly building it with kindling in the hope that it took off. Sarah soon followed with a flame, following his strategy and honestly, it was neck and neck. Both were calm and methodical, as Sarah’s flame started to lick at the ropes, while Tony’s started to die. Sadly Sarah’s soon followed, giving Tony time to build his up and take the lead. And while Sarah tried to get hers back, both the fires were licking at the rope for what felt like an eternity before Tony’s burnt through, sending him to the final tribal and Sarah out of the game.

With the most iconic final placings ever – behind Tina – as the first juror, winner and final juror. Sarah and Tony hugged and cried, praising each other for playing a hard game and staying loyal, as Sarah told Tony to finish what they started out trying to do. As she arrived at Ponderosa, she was kinda shocked that I ran straight into her arms and congratulated her on playing such a killer game. Maybe it had something to do with me trash talking her win, I don’t know? I apologised for not appreciating the dominant way she plays, and admitted I was grateful that this season showed me exactly why she is an icon. And served up a piping hot batch of Sarah Mozzarellacina Sticks to apologise.

It goes without saying that mozzarella sticks are absolutely delicious. Smooth, melty cheese coated in a hot, crunchy shell and served with marinara sauce? The. DREAM.

Enjoy!

Sarah Mozzarellacina Sticks
Serves: 2 dear friends.

Ingredients
½ cup flour
salt and pepper, to taste
2 eggs
2 ½ cups panko breadcrumbs
½ tsp cayenne pepper
500g block mozzarella, cut into 1.5cm thick sticks
vegetable oil, for fryin’
grated parmesan cheese, to serve
1 cup Amber Marinara Sauce, to serve

Method
Combine the flour in a bowl with a good whack of salt and pepper. Whisk the eggs in a second bowl, and combine the panko and cayenne in a third.

Line a baking sheet before tossing the mozzarella in the seasoned flour. Working one by one, dip them in the egg, before tossing through the spiced breadcrumbs to completely coat. Pop on the baking sheet and repeat the process until done, before transferring to the fridge for 20 minutes to set.

Pour about 2cm worth of oil in a wide frying pan and pop it over medium heat. Once nice and hot, fry the sticks for a couple of minutes, flipping once, or until golden and crisp. Transfer to a plate lined with some paper towel and repeat the process until done.

Transfer to a bowl or plate, whatever feels right, sprinkle with parmesan and serve with some Amber Marinara Sauce for dippin’.


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