Tommurice Manninen

Australian Survivor, Main, Survivor: Australia V The World, TV, TV Recap

Previously on Australian Survivor the Aussies were well and truly on the bottom, with the internationals dominating immunity challenges and even venturing to the spa together. Speaking of which, while the latter trip was taking place, the trio broke the locked box and realised the internationals also held an idol, making them even more on the bottom. After Tommi won immunity, they appeared to be locked in to get rid of Shonee. Until he, Lisa and Kass floated getting rid of Parv instead. Whether the plan was ever true or not, it led to absolute chaos at tribal council as Luke left everything on the table as he outed all the secrets. After 1000s of chats, they eventually voted with Parvati pretending she could steal Kass’s idol after the vote, though let her play it when she was told she was playing it for Lisa. Allowing Parvati and Cirie’s switch to the Aussies to land, with Kass shown the door instead.

After Kass departed, JLP gagged the tribe by telling them that the pace of the game was not letting up, as tonight, they would be voting out another person from the game. And he had a little immunity challenge set up next to tribal council.

As such the tribe pivoted to the challenge where they would hold onto a rope to steady a wobbly table while racing to balance five balls on top. Shonee was quick to get her eye in, until JLP praised her and she lost balance. The same thing happened to Parvati, before Luke seemingly got his eye in and wasn’t distracted by JLP, as he got to work on his second ball. Tommi then started to nip at his heels, before he dropped. As everyone else continued to struggle, Luke stacked his third and fourth balls, while they all grew more and more frustrated. As JLP reminded them to not give up, as Luke could still drop. All while making plenty of ball puns, of course, because JLP is the best of us. After placing his fifth ball, Luke anxiously stepped back a centimetre at a time until he made it to his table and guaranteed his place in the final six.

Back at tribal council the rain started to pour down as Kass wandered back into tribal council to join the jury. Parvati mentioned that Luke winning immunity didn’t bother her, given that Tommi was clearly leading the blindside against her and as such, she would be voting for him. This fired up Tommi, who pleaded with the Aussies to return the favours he has been doing and get rid of one of Parvati and Cirie. The Aussies stood up to chat and agreed that voting for Tommi is the simplest, safest solution and as such, they needed to stick with him. After sitting down, Luke whispered to Janine that Lisa clearly wanted his head though, so maybe they should take her out instead. Before Tommi stood up and begged Luke to vote for Cirie.

Parvati mentioned that she drew a line in the sand back at camp before tribal council and as such, she was sticking with it for this vote too. Because it didn’t feel like Tommi was just betraying her, but locking in a blindside against her. Which seems like it is the same thing, but Parv is Parv, and I am not worthy enough to question her, TBH. This led to him begging Parvati to work with him. JLP then asked if anyone wanted to say anything, leading to Lisa putting up her hand and telling Jonathan that she regretted not sticking by her people in her winning season and as such, she wanted to do that tonight and would like to quit. Which honestly infuriated JLP, who couldn’t understand why she would want to do that with only five days remaining. Lisa explained that her main goal is for an international to win the season and that she honestly doesn’t think she has the best chance, Tommi does, and she would like to guarantee him one more shot.

Jonathan then pointed out that if she quits, she isn’t on the jury and they would still vote tonight, meaning Tommi could still go home. Which quickly made her change her tune. Tommi then whispered for him to vote for Cirie before the tribe voted. And despite Tommi’s best attempts, the Aussie/US coalition stuck together to send our sweet Fin Tommi from the game.

Given he was going by the name Tom(mi) of Finland, as soon as he arrived at the Jury Villa, I pulled him in for a massive hug, thanking him for playing such a solid game. And most importantly, for being an absolute babe. Despite not being shown much of the icon in the edit, it all makes sense, given he exited at the tail end of a chaotic double boot episode and they couldn’t break our hearts if we loved him more. What was clear from the season, however, is that he was clearly beloved by his tribemates, and like Kass before him, he won himself a fan and I desperately hope to see him again. And until then, we’ll always have Tommurice Manninen.

There are so many things that are magical about Japan – honestly, can someone fund my early retirement, so I can move there? – but the spectacle of omurice is among the greatest foods. Well, foods that aren’t sold in a konbini. Soft, jiggly eggs, spicy fried rice and a rich sauce – it is probably not the fanciest food, but it is definitely among the tastiest.

Enjoy!

Tommurice Manninen
Serves: 2.

Ingredients
1 tbsp unsalted butter
½ an onion, finely diced
1 chicken breast, thinly sliced
kosher salt and pepper, to taste
6 tbsp ketchup
1 tbsp Worcestershire sauce
2 tbsp soy sauce
1 tbsp mirin
2 cups cooked Japanese short-grain rice
⅓ cup peas
3 ½ tbsp vegetable oil
1 tbsp plain flour
1 tbsp tonkatsu sauce
1 tbsp honey
¾ cup water
6 tbsp milk
6 large eggs
2 tbsp double cream

Method
Pop the unsalted butter in a large frying pan over medium heat and sweat the onion for a few minutes, or until soft and sweet. Add the chicken, along with a good whack of salt and pepper, and cook for five minutes, or until cooked through. Stir in one tablespoon of the ketchup, Worcestershire, soy and mirin, and bring to a simmer. Reduce heat to low, stir in the rice and peas, and cook until heated through and the rice is perfectly coloured. Cover and leave to rest.

Meanwhile, combine the remaining ketchup and soy with the tonkatsu sauce, honey, water and two tablespoons of milk in a bowl. Heat one and a half tablespoons of vegetable oil in a saucepan over medium heat and once warm, whisk in the flour, and cook until a nice, brown roux forms. About five minutes. Reduce heat to low and slowly whisk in the jug and cook for a further five minutes or so, or until rich and thick. Set aside.

Whisk the eggs with the remaining milk, cream and a good whack of salt and pepper. Add the remaining oil to a clean frying pan over medium heat. Once shimmering, add the egg mixture and vigorously stir and scramble with chopsticks for about a minute, or until half cooked. Give the pan a shake to even out the curds, before allowing the base to set for 15 seconds or so, before immediately using the chopsticks to gently roll the eggs on top of themselves to form a thick parcel. Cook seam side down for 30 seconds, before removing from the heat.

To serve, portion the rice in the middle of a plate, top with the soft omelette and then drizzle generously with the sauce. Before devouring with your newest bestie.


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Greekristin Salaston Pasta Bake

Australian Survivor, Australian Survivor: Brains V Brawn II, Main, Pasta, TV, TV Recap, Vegetarian

Previously on Australian Survivor Kristin, Logan and Morgan enjoyed a luxe night away and while pampering themselves in the hope of becoming luxe Brisbane icon Zara, instead set their sights on Her. Sadly for Kristin and Co, Zara used her time stuck at camp with her former allies to heal wounds and lock in a rock solid final four alliance. Emphasis on rock. After Kaelan took out immunity, they were feeling confident in sticking together. Sadly for them, so were the others, and after two deadlocks, it looked like rocks were actually incoming. Until, Kate, Morgan and Kristin lost their nerve – or learnt what it meant for them – and sent Logan home instead.

The next day, things were positively delightful back at camp as Myles showed off his pole dancing skills to the screaming delight of the girls. He was also super happy that his threat to go to rocks paid off and they now have an easy path to the end. Kate meanwhile queried whether they were actually keen to go to rocks, with the boys promising they would have had no regrets. Kaelan and Myles caught up with Kaelan assuring him that it makes sense for the four of them to work together, so they just need to avoid falling into paranoia. And then they cut Zara in fourth and battle it out from there. Talk turned to the upcoming vote with the boys realising that Kristin is the biggest threat left, quickly deciding that they need to get her out next. The only threat being an idol, so all they need to do is keep quiet and not tell the OG Brawns how they vote. And while Zara agreed with that, the fear was AJ running his mouth. Obviously.

We checked in with Kristin and Morgan who were living their best lives in the hammock, where Kristin opened up about being proud of her social game though a little bruised about how her strategic moves keep getting botched. But bless, she dusted herself off and decided that the best case moving forward would be to work with Zara to get rid of Kaelan, given he is an immunity threat. And is literally in every single person’s planned final three. As such, Kristin got to work bonding with Zara over a little hair braiding. Zara pointed out that her biggest fear is the boys knifing her in fourth place, but I worry she is just making conversation rather than actively planning to side with the girls to take them out. Zara was worried enough about being an endurance threat for the final challenge though, so went to Morgan to assure her that while the sides were locked last night, it doesn’t mean they will always be and as such, she would be open to making a move if needed.

My love Jonathan arrived for the immunity challenge where they would each hold until a bar over their head on a progressively steeper ramp, with the last one hanging on taking out the win. After ten minutes AJ dropped, followed by Myles at twenty. It then started raining – from the sky and a hose placed above each of them – making things infinitely more difficult as they lost their grip. That was enough to cost Kate, Zara and Morgan, leaving Kristin and Kaelan to battle for the win. And given our newest zaddy was zenning out like a statue and Kristin was struggling, it wasn’t a shock when she dropped and handed Kaelan his fifth immunity win.

Back at camp everyone congratulated Kaelan on his record equalling win before the Postgraduates locked in their vote for Kristin. She meanwhile asked Kaelan whether she would worry, with him telling her that he has been placed on a chat lockdown and as such can’t tell anything. But assured her he would advocate on her behalf. Kristin then approached Myles and Zara to let them know that there are three votes sitting there waiting, should they want to make a move, but they too stayed quiet. AJ meanwhile was keen to overcomplicate things and bring in Kate and Morgan to do a split vote on Kristin and one of them. Thankfully when the boys floated it with Zara, she pointed out that a split would actually result in one of them going home, given the three Brawns would stick firm.

Sadly for Zara, her frustration with the boys was written all over her face, so Kristin pulled her aside to try and work her one final time. Zara, like a boss, said that if the Brawn girls float a name, she will at least be able to consider it, otherwise there is nothing. As such, Kristin named AJ as a target and suggested they then go for Kaelan as soon as he doesn’t win immunity, given he is in everyone’s end games. Which prompted Zara to point out that he definitely wasn’t in hers. Sadly for Kristin, despite AJ being annoying, he was also Zara’s closest remaining ally and as such, she wasn’t sure she was able to pull the trigger just yet.

AJ and Myles were busy chatting by the fire, with AJ questioning why Myles didn’t like his new plan. And while Myles explained that given he had an idol, it was unlikely anyone had another one, so they shouldn’t spook Zara and Kaelan for no reason. Kate, meanwhile, was frustrated to have no information leading into tribal council, so pulled AJ aside one final time. With him essentially spilling that Krisitn is the target and while he kept dancing around saying it outright, Morgan chose to exit stage left. While he tried to spoon feed things to Kate who just wasn’t getting it. He then pulled Zara aside to try and convince her to complicate things, and while he thought he was playing smart, he was actually just pissing off his allies. And losing himself the game in the process. As he went to float it with Myles yet again, Zara aired her frustrations with Kaelan while she debated whether it actually made the most sense to align with the girls.

At tribal council Morgan spoke about how the lines seem to be locked in following Logan’s departure, with Kate upset that she was unable to take advantage of any cracks. Particularly given that everyone spoke about wanting to make big moves. Zara and AJ spoke about the importance of always keeping their ears open, though AJ was worried about shuffling the deck when he was in power. Kate continued to pitch directly to Zara, talking about it being the time to make a big move if you haven’t. Myles wisely mentioned that the best case scenario for anyone flipping would be fourth place of a different alliance. Bless, Kate and Kristin continued to work hard, pointing out that should they have similar goals, that would not be the case.

Morgan was salty that Myles never named a name, while he assured her that if she was still there tomorrow, he’d be interested in working together. Which didn’t work for her. She and Myles then argued, with Kristin suggesting that Zara could still flip. As such, Kate and Morgan suggested flipping the vote to Myles to help win her over. And when Zara got up to chat to Kate, the boys started to grow a little nervous. Despite Myles promising he wasn’t. With that the tribe voted and despite the whispers, Myles held onto his idol as the OG Brains stuck together to send Kristin from the game.

As she arrived at the Jury Villa, I pulled Kristin in for a massive hug and thanked her for bringing so much joy to the season. Despite how Paulie may have felt when confronting her later that night, Kristin has been a kind, happy player and when things got salty throughout the season, she was kind of a calm, steady force which is needed to balance things out. So between that moment of praise and Greekristin Salaston Pasta Bake, she wasn’t disappointed to have had her torch snuffed for too long.

Combining all the best bits of greek salad – cheese and olives, obvi – and trading out the healthy bits of pasta is honestly such an iconic move. Salty and rich, this quick little bake is the perfect meal as we head into the winter months.

Enjoy!

Greekristin Salaston Pasta Bake
Serves: 4-6.

Ingredients
500g penne
2 tbsp olive oil
1 onion, diced
2 garlic cloves, crushed
2 tbsp tomato paste
800g canned diced tomatoes
½ cup chicken stock
½ cup black olives, pitted and sliced
½ cup chargrilled capsicum, sliced
1 tbsp oregano, roughly chopped
150g feta, crumbled
½ cup mozzarella, grated 

Method
Preheat the oven to 180C and get a pot of salted water over high heat. Once the water is boiling, cook the pasta per packet instructions and drain.

While that is happening, heat the oil in a large pan over medium heat and cook the onion for five minutes, or until soft and sweet. Add the garlic and tomato paste, and cook for a further minute before adding the diced tomatoes and stock. Bring to the boil, reduce heat to low and simmer for five minutes.

By that point the pasta should be done, so combine the sauce and pasta in a baking dish along with the olive, capsicum, oregano and feta. Sprinkle with the mozzarella, and pop in the oven to bake for 15 minutes, or until the cheese is gooey and golden, before devouring.


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Kale & Sausage Pizzthia

Main, Pizza, RuPaul's Drag Race Global All Stars, RuPaul's Drag Race Global All Stars 1, TV, TV Recap

Previously on Global All Stars the dolls played the Snatch Game and given the season hasn’t been nice to the international girlies, it was always going to be a battle for our poor ESL queens. I mean, could you imagine trying to do improv in anything other than your native tongue? Impossible. But rant over. Pythia was a breath of fresh air, pivoting to a frat-bro Zeus 10 minutes before the shoot and someone looking glorious and firing all of the jokes. In the other group, it was Kitty’s glum, horny, filthy and glorious Princess Di that stole the show. Sadly Pythia didn’t get what should have been her third win, and instead Kitty as Prinny Di earned her, her second. At the other end of the pack it was a battle of the assassins as Gala and Vanity faced off in the lip sync. And given it was literally a song from The Muppets, Vanity leant into her silliness and sent poor Gala home.

Backstage Kitty was thrilled to have jagged her second win – that again, should have been Pythia’s – and most importantly, to finally be a Snatch Game winner. Which is once again a reminder of how good Ella was as Nigella. But once again, I’ve digressed. Tessa was feeling disappointed to have gone from winning to the bottom, particularly since she was an absolute flop. Talk turned to the lip sync with the dolls reminding Vanity that they haven’t heard Ru laugh like that in a lip sync, well, ever. While Vanity was just grateful to have Kween’s advice to put the negative talk in the boot of the car and drive on through the competition.

The next day Kween admitted she was quite surprised to see who had made it into the top seven before everyone realised that Vanity is now the official lip sync assassin of the season. Kitty was busy wishing for a comedy challenge and from her mouth to Ru’s ears, mother arrived to announce that for this week’s maxi challenge the dolls would be battling it out in a rich international roast. So yeah, condragulations Kitty, I guess. Pythia meanwhile was terrified, hoping their mystery guest would be able to coach her to a cheeky safe placement. Oh and as the winner of last week’s challenge, Kitty would be deciding the order.

After Ru exited, the dolls split up to work through their jokes with Alyssa hoping for rudemption after her bomb in Season 5. Forgetting that All Stars 2 exists, basically. BEAST! Given Tessa has never done a roast, she was hoping that Alyssa could give her some pointers for no other reason than she is evil. Kitty meanwhile was feeling her oats, given the jokes about her sisters were writing themselves. Pythia on the other hand, tragically, was paralysed by fear as she worried about bombing her second roast. Kween, Nehellenia and Vanity were kikiing and having fun, particularly Kween, given the other two had no material and she was having a ball reading them for filth. Oh and Vanity had no material as she was planning to sing her roast. Talk turned to the order with Kitty wanting the dolls to turn a good show, so would be putting herself and Kween as the bookends with the flops just filling out the middle. Which is kinda what everyone wants, so it even appears fair. 

Graham Norton then dropped by with a cup of joe to coach the doll. After reading Nelly for not having a win, of course. Nelly to her credit opened up about being delusional more than funny, while Tessa was worried about delivering a joke and Alyssa was just hoping to live up to everyone’s expectations. Kween opened up about how brutal everyone is Down Under, so felt ready to demolish the challenge. While Graham encouraged all of them to just focus on being funny and leaning into their weaknesses to cut through. Talk turned to cancellation, with Graham reminding them to make people laugh and that is all that matters. Kitty then decided it was time to announce the order, opting to take the opening slot and then be followed by Vanity, Pythia, Alyssa, Nelly and Tessa before finishing with Kween. And when Kitty mentioned she wanted peaks and valleys in the show, everyone was left wondering who exactly would be the valleys.

Oh and then the zaddy with the nipple ring from the Pit Crew returned and hot damn, I am moister than an oyster.

Elimination Day arrived with Kween ready to devour her set, turning everyone’s attention back to being cancelled. Vanity admitted she got a lot of hate after her first season, while Alyssa reminded her of Ru’s quote that other people’s opinions of her are none of her business and hot damn if that is not the best life advice, no?

Ru, Michelle and Jamal were joined on the panel by international treasure Graham Norton as Kitty kicked off the roast in an absolutely blistering manner. Vanity then sang her song, finding all keys but not a single laugh. By comparison, Pythia was not the worst. But not by much. Alyssa thankfully brought the energy back up, elevating her ok jokes with her pitch perfect delivery. Nehellenia started strong and kept the energy going through the entire set, surprising and delighting her sisters in the process. Tessa felt like she brought the jokes from home via AI, before Kween, thankfully, brought the roast to a killer end by eviscerating her competition. I mean, she called Kitty a coloniser. Essentially. Iconic.

On the Blow Me Away runway Kitty was a gorgeous combination of a bride and Bey’s pregnancy shoot, but stuck in a tornado. Vanity was draped in tinsel and I love Christmas, but I don’t love this. Though apparently her OG dress was ruined in transit, so let’s forgive it. Pythia was a stunning, elven goddess doing Ursula cosplay, and so lovely. Alyssa was a shimmering Texan delight in blue, Nehellenia was a gorgeous flaming delight, Tessa was a silver siren before Kween ate them in a gorgeous golden gown, giving us a Bey bookend.

Kitty received wall to wall praise from the judges, though Michelle did wish she took a breath during the roast. Vanity on the other hand got wall to wall demolishment, particularly for the look. The judges just felt roasting goes against Pythia’s nature as she is so kind, but her runway was once again perfect. Alyssa was praised for everything she brought to the competition across the season, and praised for her confidence carrying her through the roast. Nehellenia was praised for surprising the judges in both the challenge and on the runway, Tessa was read for letting the nerves get to her on the roast though they were grateful for a killer look. Oh and then Kween was equally as beloved as Kitty.

Backstage Kitty and Kween were well and truly feeling their oats as everyone praised Nehellenia for such a dominant performance. Pythia admitted that she just doesn’t understand stand up and as such, is fine to lip sync if her look can’t save her again. While Vanity joked that she was hoping to get another win, though didn’t want to be exiting the competition on her one year anniversary of entering Drag Race Sverige.

Ultimately Kitty and Kween were both deemed winners before Alyssa and Nehellenia were sent to safety. With Tessa the last to join them, as Vanity and Pythia were sent through to the lip sync. And while Pythia had a home court advantage in the form of Celine’s I Drove All Night, Vanity felt every single moment of the song and while she looked like ONJ, she was Celine. Which tragically meant the darkest timeline continued and Pythia was booted from the competition.

As is oft the case, particularly this season, Pythia followed the sounds of wild tears to find me backstage where I pulled her in for a massive hug. Begging for her to wake me up from this nightmare, given she should have minimum three wins, instead of going out in the middle of the pack. Eventually she calmed me down, assuring me that she was just so grateful to get another shot at a crown and show of her skills to a global audience, which is a super kind and mature way to handle it. Which is super on brand for her. So to thank her for both her kindness and artistry, I whipped up a piping hot Kale & Sausage Pizzthia.

While it is potentially the reason why Pythia lost – the pizza curse is real, ya’ll – it is so delicious you almost can’t be mad. Spicy sausage, velvety ricotta and a zing of lemon are the perfect throuple to mark such a glorious drag queen.

Enjoy!

Kale & Sausage Pizzthia
Serves: 4.

Ingredients
2 bases as per Pizsa Zsa Gabor
200g ricotta
50g grated parmesan
1 lemon, zested
salt and pepper, to taste
2 spring onions, sliced
2 cups kale, shredded
100g hot salami, thinly sliced
mozzarella, grated

Method
Prep the bases as per Zsa Zsa’s instructions and preheat the oven to 180°C.

Combine the ricotta, parmesan and lemon zest in a bowl with a good whack of salt and pepper. Smear over the bases, sprinkle with spring onions, followed by the kale and the salami and finally the mozzarella.

Pop it in the oven to bake for 15 minutes, or until bubbly and golden. Then devour, safely.


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Vietnamese Riannoodle Bowleys

Australian Survivor, Australian Survivor: Titans V Rebels, Main, TV, TV Recap

Previously on Australian Survivor Alex invited Kirby on reward to try and finally win her over. I’m not sure how almost slicing off his nipples factored into his plans, but while shaving his chest, he sure gave it a red hot go. After Ri narrowly beat him at the third endurance immunity challenge, he tried to rally the boys to come together to make a move against Kirby, deciding they needed Caroline on board to take her out. Though specifically not Kitty, given she had grown close with Kirby. There was also a plan to take out Ray which was born at the reward, though TBH, I’m not sure how close that ever was to eventuating. Alex then read everyone for filth at tribal council and in the process, turned everyone against him, so they banded together to boot him. Either as planned, or instead of their other blindsides.

The next day Ray, Kirby, Ri and Kitty hung out by the fire in silence, with Kirby in particular feeling stressed, given she can no longer fly under the radar. Kitty and Kirby spoke about how aggressively Alex played at tribal council, and as such, nobody wanted to work with him because of it. Kirby and Ri went for a walk to talk about their exact level of being screwed, with them deciding that the only way to get the target off themselves is to give everyone a better option. Quickly deciding Mark needs to go. As such, Kirby caught up with Caroline and suggested she would gladly do whatever she wants at the next tribal council. And when Caroline offered up Mark, what do you know, she was super keen. Caroline told us that she truly is concerned about building her resume, and knew that partnering with Kirby could be the ticket to making hers unbeatable.

Kirby meanwhile went to check in with Feras, with him asking if she is nervous after everything Alex said. Feras straight up told her that he doesn’t think he needs to get rid of her yet, though in two episodes, he will probably have a crack. Feras wisely, and calmly, spoke about happily voting out Mark, before talking about how they need to figure out whether they want to move forward with their allies, or whether they should look at who they could beat. With Kirby straight up suggesting her ideal final two would be her and Feras, given it would be the biggest competition and she could then say she beat the best. Feras then went for a wander with Ray, who wisely cautioned that Kirby is obviously going to say that to him, given she knows she is the one to beat. So she won’t care who she sits next to. And just like that, operation take down Kirby was back on.

As Mark, Kitty, Ri and Kirby frolicked in the ocean, Caroline got back to Pat Mullins-ing, telling us that she and Kitty are focused on keeping Ri and Kirby close enough so they will be able to get rid of Mark, given it is all she has wanted since the swap. Feras meanwhile was busy fishing, talking about how it is clear that Kirby is nervous and as such, he is confident that she is busy building a female alliance. As such, he pulled Caroline aside to run interference, telling her that Kirby told him about the all women alliance, but cautioned her plan was to get rid of Caroline next. And while it wasn’t true, it worked and Caroline was ready to chop Kirby and/or Ri. Feras then looped in Mark and Ray, while Kirby took over the watching game from Caroline, and seeing all the chats made her super nervous. Caroline then caught up with Kirby and was so friendly and high-pitched, it was clear to her that Caroline was just lying to her to keep her placated.

That night Kirby lay awake, overwhelmed by how much she is loving the game and how she will do anything to stay. As such, she woke up Feras and said that she would happily vote out Ri if it means he will keep her around. He then admitted that he has definitely heard her name being thrown around, and sadly, doesn’t see a way to stop it. Unless everyone loads up on Ri, obviously!

The tribe met up with JLP for the immunity challenge where they would race to stack a series of blocks on a plank and get them to fall like dominoes at the end. Sadly, they would also be holding a weight the entire time, and if they don’t keep it high enough, it would knock over the blocks. Almost instantly Ray and Feras knocked over their first block, as everyone struggled to get their eye in. As is oft the case the challenge was back and forth as people would start to make progress and then drop, or in Feras’ case, the wind would just blow over his blocks. Ri got out to a lead before she dropped, allowing Kitty and Kirby to power ahead, until one of Kitty’s ended up on the ground and she thought she was out of them. Which was all it took for Kirby to finish her stack, however sadly for her, they weren’t close enough, causing her to rebuild. This led to Ray, Ri and Kitty closing the gap before Kirby rebuilt and ended up falling just one short. Kitty then tried and failed, Ray tried and failed before Kirby tried one final time and finally jagged immunity.

Before she broke down in tears, wandered off to the shore and we skipped JLP popping the necklace around her neck.

Back at camp Feras and his allies quickly pivoted and locked in the plan for Ri, while Kirby tried for one last ditch attempt at getting rid of Mark. As such, she pulled Feras aside to point out that Ray and Ri just follow whatever they do but haven’t actually done anything. And as such, it is unwise of them to get rid of Ri or Ray yet, given they need them to stop the Titans from picking them off. The Titans all disappeared from camp at the same time, with Ri telling Kirby and Feras she knows she is at least copping a few votes. Ri then caught up with Kitty who straight up flubbed and told her that she would be voting for her. She then asked Caroline, whose voice went up an octave, which was the tell that it was a lie. Kirby then caught up with Kitty and Caroline, with them once again assuring her they would like to get Mark. However this time, it inspired her to flip, given the Ri vote is following the group, but she desperately wants a move on her resume, and as such, was thinking Mark was the smarter choice for her.

At tribal council Feras spoke about how busy Kirby has been back at camp after Alex’s explosive exit at the last tribal council. Caroline spoke about how it broke the tribe apart, with literally everyone reassessing how they would make it to the end. Kirby spoke about feeling the need to win immunity today, and literally all the others, as she is on display, but trust and believe, she will always fight to stay whether she has a necklace or not. Ri spoke about how happy she was to see Kirby win, though was disappointed to know it meant she is likely copping votes. She then pointed out that while she is a challenge threat, people should also look at what people are doing back at camp. Which Mark agreed was the case, going so far as to say challenges won’t win the game. This led to a little back and forth between them, trying to get the target off themselves.

Kirby turned everyone’s attention to resume building and how hard they are all working, not just to get to the end, but to be in a winning position. She then doubled down, talking about how she firmly believes that she wants to face off against the best at the end, and while it was heartfelt, Feras laughed about wanting a fun resume and that anything can deliver a win. Mark pointed out that the tribe is well and truly full of threats, though they really need to articulate things well. Ri then whispered to Kirby that they’re good, with Kirby whispering to Feras to write down Mark’s name. And while JLP called it out, they moved on as Caroline spoke about focusing on making it to the end. With that the tribe voted and despite her confidence, the tribe banded together to boot Ri. 

As she arrived at the Jury Villa I pulled Ri in and shook her hand, congratulating her on aligning with an icon and killing the endurance challenges. Specifically the ones in that frame contraption. While I’m sure she did a lot more than we were shown, poor Ri was just kind of there and while I’d love to praise her game, I just don’t know what hers was. And as such, I gave her a pat on the back, served her some Vietnamese Riannoodle Bowleys and moved on.

Unlike Ri’s edit, these bowls pack a punch and are in your face. Spicy, fresh and oh-so-more-ish, they’re the perfect thing to whip up when you’re starving and can’t decide what you want to eat.

Enjoy!

Vietnamese Riannoodle Bowleys
Serves: 4.

Ingredients
1 tbsp minced lemongrass
4 garlic cloves, minced
2 tbsp coriander, roughly chopped
3 tbsp soy sauce
1 tbsp honey
1 tbsp muscovado sugar
3 tbsp fish sauce
500g chicken thighs, sliced
½ cup water
3 tbsp caster sugar
1 lime, zested and juiced
1 bird’s eye chilli, thinly sliced
4 Bruce Springsteen Rolls
200g rice vermicelli noodles
sesame oil
1 head butter lettuce, roughly chopped
1 carrot, peeled and julienned
1 cucumber, julienned
1 capsicum, sliced
½ cup roasted peanuts, roughly chopped
coriander and mint leaves, to taste

Method
Combine the lemongrass, garlic, coriander, soy, honey, muscovado and 1 tablespoon of the fish sauce in a large bowl with the chicken thighs. Cover and pop in the fridge to marinate for a few hours. 

While the chicken is getting juiced, combine the water, caster sugar, lime juice and bird’s eye chilli with the remaining fish sauce in a jug. Whisk, cover and pop in the fridge to come together.

When you’re getting hungry, cook the spring rolls as per Bruce’s recipe and the rice noodles per packet directions, and prep the veg for the bowls.

Heat a large skillet over medium heat and add a good lug of sesame oil. When shimmering and fragrant, add the chicken and stir fry for a few minutes, or until cooked through. Add all the marinade and continue to cook until it is sticky and caramelised on the outside.

To assemble, pop some lettuce in the bowl, topped by the noodles. Arrange the veg together, cut up the spring rolls and place next to the veg before popping the chicken in the final third. Sprinkle with peanuts and herbs, followed by a generous splash of the dressing. And then devour.


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Zucchini Chicken Kanoodles

Canada's Drag Race 4, Canada’s Drag Race, Main, Pasta, Poultry, TV, TV Recap

Previously on Canada’s Drag Race the dolls put on a suprisingly fun Snatch Game as mother Melinda take out her first win of the season and proved that she was more than just good drama. Returning the favour by saving her friend Kiki and leaving Aurora to dominate the lip sync and send Luna to the house. Brooke then announced that this week would be a little different, as the dolls would compete in a Lip Sync Slay Off Extravaganza, with three people lip syncing and two people going home. In the first round, Melinda defeated Kitten, Aurora sent Denim to the bottom four, Nearah got revenge on her nemesis Aimee and Venua won out over Kiki. And I decided to hedge my bets and assumed Aimee would be one of the dolls going home, I gave her culinary comfort before she did go home.

But I’ve gotten ahead of myself.

In round two, Melinda and Aurora did battle to Boys Wanna Be Her by my queen Peaches. And yeah, it was obviously a slay from both of the dolls. But Aurora played her leg like a guitar and as such, rightly took out the win while Melinda was sent to safety. Nearah and Venus then slayed the shit out of Pull Up by Keys N Krates featuring Haviah Mighty. And yeah, it was a show. But once again, Nearah proved to be an assassin, taking out the win and sending Venus to safety. As such, Nearah stuck around on stage as Aurora joined her in the fight for the win to Black Velvet. And since it is literally one of the best songs of all time, the dolls gave it their all and did it justice. But given it is all sex, Nearah had the upper hand and parlayed it into her first win of the season and gave her the power of the Golden Beaver, allowing her to save one of the bottom four while the remaining trio would fight to avoid being a double boot.

Backstage the dolls came together to contgratulate Neaah on her win, before she asked if anyone wanted to volunteer to earnt their place in the top six and lip sync. Everyone, obviously, kept quiet though. Aimee pretended she didn’t hate Nearah as she wanted to be safe, while Denim was very, very anxious, given she doesn’t feel like Nearah can be trusted to be fair and she is a threat. Essentially. Kitten meanwhile spoke about all her skills, immediately stirking her from being saved by Nearah. While Kiki desperately hoped that Nearah’s passion for stirring the pot would save her. Given it would make it a third time for her.

Ultimately Nearah opted to save Denim, as Kitten, Aimee and Kiki took their places to fight for the final slot to Lara Fabian’s I Will Love Again. And damn, Kiki found her fire as she turned emotions and tricks in equal measure. Kitten meanwhile had emotion, while Aimee was in the pocket, but there is no denying this was Kiki’s show and as such, she was rightly saved and sent through to the top six, while Aimee and Kitten sashayed away.

Given we already covered Aimee’s departure before it happened – hey, we know I’m psychic and invented time travel, after all – I could focus all my attention on the ultimate robbed goddess of the season, Kitten. As she arrived backstage, I pulled her in for a massive hug and immediately burst into tears. Through sobs, I told her how grateful I was to have a legend actually turn up and slay week after week, as so often the older gals don’t get the flowers they deserve. And TBH, if it weren’t for a double boot, I could easily have seen her making it to the top four. However, tragically, that wasn’t the case and instead we had to eat our feelings with big bowls of Zucchini Chicken Kanoodles.

Yeah, yeah – zucchini as pasta is a thing we’re all keen on now (particualrly in the new year, new me period), but in pasta? Well, that isn’t something we love. Until you try this, that is. Juicy, sweet and oh so fresh, it is the perfect throw-together meal that leaves you feeling nourished and smug, given it is healthy.

Enjoy!

Zucchini Chicken Kanoodles
Serves: 4.

Ingredients
250g angel hair spaghetti
1 tbsp olive oil
1 tbsp butter
500g chicken breast, diced
2 zucchinis, halved, deseeded and sliced
1 capsicum, deseeded and sliced
5 garlic cloves, minced 
1 tsp Italian seasoning
1 lemon, zested and juiced
½ cup parmesan cheese, grated
½ cup Italian parsley, diced
¼ cup pine nuts, toasted
kosher salt and pepper, to taste

Method
Bring a large pot of salted water to a boil and cook the pasta to package instructions, reserving a cup of pasta water before draining.

While that is all coming together, pop the olive oil and butter in a medium pan and saute the chicken, stirring, for about ten minutes, or until cooked through. Add the zucchini and capsicum and cook for a couple of minutes, or until tender. Fold in the garlic, Italian seasoning, lemon zest and juice and cook for another minute. 

Add the pasta to the pan and stir until well combined, adding water to thin it out as needed. Stir in the parmesan, pine nutes and parsley, and adjust the seasoning and water to taste and desired consistency.

Serve and then devour, like a damn icon.


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Chickemily Flippenne in Parmesan Cream Sauce

Main, Pasta, Poultry, Survivor, Survivor 45, TV, TV Recap

Previously on Survivor Austin handed his idol off to Julie ahead of a team immunity challenge, unsure what weird variation of tribal council could screw his ally out of the game. Thankfully it was all for nought as Jeff opted against too much chaos, allowing the Rebas to take control of the tribe. After Emily jagged a reward and took the ladies for an overnight vacay, they locked in a plan to blindside Bruce should he not win immunity. The only catch being his pesky idol. As such, they got to work convincing him he was safe and that Mama J – aka Julie – was the true target as she was such a massive threat to win. After Austin took out immunity, Emily worked overtime on Bruce to the point I wasn’t actually sure what the plan was until everyone banded together and blindsided Bruce with an idol in his pocket.

Back at camp the tribe were thrilled to have pulled off an epic blindside. None more so than Katurah, who was giddy to have finally felled her lecturing, micro-managing nemesis. Julie meanwhile was shocked that she was the one he voted for, given ironically, she was the only one willing to work with him. Emily jumped in to provide context, pointing out she went to Bruce and told him that Julie was playing him and that she was happy to join him to blindside her to protect him, which is the actual reason he never played his idol. And while everyone was shocked and excited to hear how detailed her plan was, Julie grew wary of just how threatening Emily could prove to be.

After everyone went to sleep, the Reba 4 caught up by the shore, congratulating each other for officially taking control before promptly locking in an official final four. Julie and Drew then went back to camp, leaving Austin and Dee to flirt and be all cute as they watched the stars and yeah, I ship them. As they likened themselves to Boston Rob and Amber (kinda), and ugh, I love love. But given they vowed to take each other to the final three, you know someone random is winning the final immunity challenge and they will be the duo facing off in fire for the final spot. Mark. My. Words.

The next day Jake continued to feel left out, hoping that the seven votes he has received thus far will be it for the game. Meaning he will be a zero vote finalist. Mark those words too. He and Katurah caught up, locking in an alliance to go to the end, no doubt because Katurah can already tell that he wouldn’t get votes at the end. Jake opened up about being a lawyer, encouraging Katurah and telling her she could be a lawyer herself, if she wanted. After Julie joined them, Katurah felt compelled to share her story and while she didn’t admit to being a lawyer, she spoke about her harrowing childhood, being pulled out of school at 10 after her family joined a cult and that she missed years, before her mum pulled them out of the cult when she was earmarked as the leaders next wife. And then she worked her arse off to catch up and continued to thrive until she achieved her dreams to fight for other black women.

And yeah, you know I am rooting hard for Katurah now.

A boat then arrived at camp offering a journey for one, with everyone wanting to go, meaning they had to draw rocks. With Emily, the most reluctant, the one to win the trip. As she departed, Julie and Drew spoke about Emily slowly building her resume and being a threat. Julie then suggested that maybe now would be the time to get rid of her, which Drew quickly shut down. Making Julie nervous as she noticed him getting more and more suspicious. Julie and Dee caught up, with the latter agreeing that Drew is the one she is most suspicious of. Particularly since he is close with Emily, and they just can’t trust that she will tell the truth about what happens on her journey.

Speaking of which, Emily arrived at Journey Island where she wandered the shore and discovered the ring puzzle that four people failed at earlier this season. However she was too scared about not having her vote at seven, so bounced, despite knowing everyone would be back at camp talking about targeting her.

Katurah and Jake were busy practising fire with Drew, who wanted to know who they would be willing to go to the end with. And while they were coy, Katurah agreed that she just doesn’t think she could beat Julie or Dee. Leading to Drew, eventually, getting them to agree that getting rid of Julie should be their absolute priority. Katurah then wandered off and caught up with Austin, pointing out that she isn’t really sure who she wants to go to the end with, but she does already know who she doesn’t want to go with: Julie. With Austin quickly and calmly agreeing that she is right, particularly since she wanted to get Julie out, followed by Emily. Not his girlfriend. Austin then caught up with Drew to see what he was thinking, with Drew working hard to convince him that getting rid of Julie should be the priority, given she isn’t even willing to return his idol.

Emily returned to camp, talking everyone through the experience in full, honest detail. Which obviously meant Dee and Julie didn’t buy it. Emily went for a walk, with Drew following to let her know that Julie is well and truly out to get her. Leaving the duo to go person to person to rally the troops against each other. 

Jeffrey finally made an appearance for this week’s immunity challenge where they would have to unravel rope that they would be tethered to, then race through a series of obstacles, toss sandbags at blocks and then use the blocks to solve a rainbow puzzle. Oh and the winner would get an epic BBQ reward for them back at camp. Jake was first to make a start before quickly realising he didn’t have enough rope, allowing Drew to power ahead as the rest of the tribe struggled. Austin closed the gap and it became a battle as the boys tried to figure out the puzzle. With Drew eventually figuring out how to make it work on both sides, handing himself immunity. As he channelled Michelle and kicked shit, just for funsies. You know Probst then offered Drew the chance to share his BBQ with someone, opting to take Jake given they haven’t had a reward. And then Austin, to keep guys’ night alive.

Back at camp the girls went off to luxuriate in the ocean and read up on the history of buffs, given they are all planning to target either Julie and Emily. Eventually Dee suggested they vote out Jake just to make things less awkward. We then caught up with the boys who were smashing their burgies and TBH, it truly did look lovely. They then debated the merits of getting rid of Julie or Emily and while Jake didn’t exactly trust anyone, he did trust that they needed him this round and as such, happily jumped on board the Julie vote. Agreeing to keep Dee out of the loop as long as possible to reduce the chances of her playing the idol.

They came back together where the guilt started to play on Austin as he worried about telling Dee. As such, they went for a walk together along the shore with Dee sharing she is locked to get rid of Emily, before Austin casually, awkwardly, shared that there is currently a growing movement against Julie. Which Dee obviously hated, though she tried to hide it, given she didn’t want her emotions getting the best of her. After thinking on it, she figured trusting her heart has proven successful thus far, so caught up with Julie at the shelter and told her to play her idol tonight. Julie then caught up with Jake and Emily to suggest the plan was one of the girls, though she would happily make a move against Austin if they wanted. After Julie went for a walk, Emily told Julie that she is trying to rally the troops against Austin, which resulted in all of them descending into chaos. As Drew and Austin bickered about whether Dee spilled the beans and Dee tried to talk Julie out of targeting Austin and to stick to the plan to blindside Emily.

At tribal council Drew and Julie spoke about how the game gets easy as it goes along, given everyone becomes more and more desensitised to blindsiding people. Katurah spoke about the fact you need to successfully compartmentalise, while Emily pointed out that everyone has full bags with them tonight as nobody can trust they will be safe. Drew tried to be cagey before unleashing about how they are in a new page of history, a wanky way of saying they are thinking who they want to face off against in the final three. Julie and Emily spoke about how they have tried to steel their emotions as they planned to vote out someone they love, with Austin agreeing it has come to the point of having to simply figure out who’s motives align with yours. While Katurah admitted she was scared about the chance of an idol, given everyone played their cards so close to their chest.

With that the tribe voted as everyone – including Dee, as per the plan – voted for Julie, before she played Austin’s gifted idol in a very showy move, sending Emily out of the game with a single, solitary vote. Emily found her way to Ponderosa by following my screaming tears, before pulling me in for a massive hug and assuring me she would be fine. Sadly for her, it didn’t pacify me, as I screamed that I would not be. After 40 minutes of heaving sobs though, I finally realised I will be fine because Emily is one of the breakout stars of the new era and as such, will return multiple times over the years and will likely win on her second outing. And until then, we’ll always have Chickemily Flippenne in Parmesan Cream Sauce.

This is one of those perfect soothing dishes for the end of the year when we’re all limping to a break. Rich and creamy, with a sweet punch of tomato, this all works in harmony to fill your stomach and warm hearts. Just like Emily throughout the season.

Enjoy!

Chickemily Flippenne in Parmesan Cream Sauce
Serves: 6.

Ingredients
500g penne
1 tbsp olive oil
2 chicken breasts, diced
1 cup button mushrooms, thinly sliced
4 garlic cloves, minced
1 cup sundried tomatoes, drained and roughly chopped
1 tsp Italian seasoning
1 tbsp unsalted butter
1 tbsp flour
2 cups cream
1 cup parmesan cheese, grated
2 cups baby spinach, washed
salt and pepper, to taste

Method
Bring a pot of salted water to the boil and cook the pasta per the cooking instructions, minus a minute. Drain, run under cool water and to rest.

Heat the olive oil in a large skillet over medium heat and cook the chicken, stirring, for five minutes or so, or until cooked through. Add the mushrooms, garlic, sundried tomato and Italian seasoning, cooking until fragrant and the mushrooms are soft. Add the butter and flour and cook for a further couple of minutes before stirring in the cream. Bring to a near-boil, reduce to low and stir in the parmesan until smooth. Finally stir in the baby spinach and cook until wilted. Remove from the heat.

Once the pasta is ready, stir through the sauce, season and serve. Then add a little more parmesan and devour, like a boss. Ideally with a glass of confessional wine.


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Festivicki Frivacious

Poultry, RuPaul's Drag Race UK, RuPaul's Drag Race UK, Side, Snack, Street Food, TV, TV Recap

Previously on Drag Race UK the dolls put on the show as they performed in the opening and closing of the new hit rusical, Panto-she Better Don’t. The rusical. Live! And as appears to be tradition for our UK girlies, everyone was rather solid. Begging the question, was Charlie Hides right? Ginger shone brighter than everyone as a cow, while Vicki and Michael made a dynamic duo of lovers. Though it was Ginger that took out her second win of the season. Sadly there had to be a bottom two, however, and since Banksie was nervous and DeDe missed the mark due to never having seen a musical, it was them. And tragically, DeDe absolutely slaughtered the lip sync and sent our sweet Banksie home.

Backstage the dolls were in shock that it was Banksie that went home, particularly since it was so soon. Though DeDe, obviously, was just glad it was not her. She shared how the lip sync was a little cathartic, while Cara admitted that she had grown to love Banksie and as such, was heartbroken. Kate meanwhile was genuinely disappointed to see her bestie go, though pivoted and congratulated Ginger on taking out victory. She in turn spoke about her shock that she won, originally thinking she was going to be lip syncing. Vicki pretended to be happy for her, though was clearly jealous. Kate thankfully kept things moving, asking Cara and Tomara whether they regretted giving up roles to the tops and you best believe it galvanised them not to give anything up again.

The next day the dolls were feeling energised and spicy, particularly Ginger, as the first queen to be donning two badges. Which she assured her sisters was absolutely correct. They turned their attention to who had wins under their belts, with Kate trying to convince her sisters that having fun is the real win, innit. Ginger meanwhile spoke about finally understanding what it means to have nerve, and you best believe she will be keeping that in focus from now on.

Ru interrupted the kiki to announce that for this week’s maxi challenge, finally, the dolls would be playing the iconique Snatch Game. So you know Kate was finally ready to score a win and leave DeDe as the sole badgeless queen. Cara, meanwhile, was absolutely terrified. The dolls immediately split up to talk through their characters with Cara wisely opting for Dionne Warwick, Kate was obviously doing her namesake Kate Bush, Ginger went with Dame Barbara Cartland, DeDe was debating between Lady C and Julia Fox, though hoping to go with the former, whether Ru gets it or not.

As she debated herself, Ru dropped by to give her dolls a peptalk with her pumped for Vicki’s Fanny Cradock, living for Ginger’s camp choice though most excited for Tomara playing Mrs. Doubtfire, giving she is just funny without even trying. Essentially the Alyssa Edwards of the UK. Cara’s choice of Dionne delighted Ru, given she is a massive fan, which obviously made Cara shit herself. Particularly when she couldn’t name more songs than her biggest hit. While Kate Butch delighted Ru with the choice of Kate Bush, despite the nerves of her being too much of a fan to have fun with it. Michael was doing a Catherine Tate character, which really made Ru nervous, given she is stuck in someone else’s bit. Though Michael assured her, she is ready for this. While DeDe was still debating, until Ru admitted he knows Lady C but bored by this Julia Fox character. Who she has never heard of.

We quickly pivoted to set where Carol Vordeman and Alexandra Burke took their places on the panel and Ginger once again came out of the gate starring, Cara was surprisingly fun, Kate was demented, Tomara was so fun and silly, despite her southern accent bombing. DeDe meanwhile was vamping it up, Vicki served smut and Michael was even hornier. While Ginger, Kate and Tomara went from strength to strength throughout the game, DeDe flatlined on her very first response while Vicki started to drown amongst her pre-prepared bits. Cara, meanwhile, was the true surprise, holding her own and looking to be having the most fun. Well, after Tomara. 

Elimination Day arrived with Kate thrilled to definitely not be in the bottom, while Michael was gagged by how funny Tomara is. Ginger and Kate were feeling jubilant as they beat their mugs together, while Vicki and DeDe spoke about how badly they both bombed, fully ready to lip sync no matter how glorious their runways are. Talk turned to first times in drag with Tomara pulling out a photo and ugh, it was so bad, charming and funny, and damn, crown Tomara now, she is an icon. Gagging everyone with the fact she has been Tomara since 14! 

Michael meanwhile spoke about how proud of her she is, given she is just so confident in who she is, while Michael struggled with having to keep everything on the downlow when she was younger. Cara shared that Cara was born when she was 17, while Ginger admitted she was disappointed her grandmother couldn’t see her in drag, given they had a hat game. Where they would go into a hat department, pop one on the other’s head and then they would have to make a character. Kate meanwhile got her start in uni and as such, there was nothing to worry about with her parents, given she had already moved out.

Ru, Michelle and Alan were joined by Alexandra on the judges panel as Tomara opened the Hearts On runway giving the sexiest cardiac nurse known to man. Though maybe she is death? Vicki gave the ultimate Queen of Hearts and worked overtime to make up for her snatch with a stunning look. Kate meanwhile cried for the sailors before revealing herself to be a pin up, Michael was stunning in a chain black heart, complete with a red hand reveal before DeDe was kinda underwhelming with hearts stuck to a corset, though making it shot with cupid’s arrows. Ginger gave anatomical heart by way of Grimace (but in a good way) before Cara closed the show serving demon heart collector.

Michael and Cara were swiftly sent to safety before Tomara received universal praise for how demented she was throughout the entirety of Snatch Game. The level of manic delighting the judges, while her perfectly stunning runway gave them levels. And yeah, a good week for Tomara. Vicki was given props for serving the look of Fanny, though read for completely bombing Snatch Game. Though they did love her runway, which does help, no? Flipping the critique, Kate’s Kate was completely beloved though her runway was universally meh’ed for being ill fitting and underwhelming. DeDe’s Lady C was read for being bland while the runway was deemed a little messy. While as has become tradition, everything that Ginger served was universally beloved. 

Backstage Michael and Cara were thrilled to have been deemed safe in the most difficult challenge, while Cara was really hoping to get out of her head to finally stop coasting. The tops and bottoms joined the fun with Vicki and DeDe joking about how shite they were before going to learn the lyrics for the lip sync. Kate was thrilled to get such strong critiques, though continued to make jokes about her outfits, before Ginger shared that once again she will be taking out the win. Though more focused on the fact the judges think her outfits are a joke, when she was feeling sexy. While Tomara was thrilled that they loved her manic performance.

As everyone predicted Ginger took out her third win in a row as Tomara and Kate were sent to safety, leaving Vicki and DeDe to lip sync for the final spot to Alexandra’s own Heartbreak on Hold. And well, it is a bop and both the dolls were not ready to go home without a fight. DeDe though, was just inspired, using her chopsticks to conduct the opening and after that, she had the entire panel in the palm of her hand and while Vicki gave us consummate performer, the de-demented performance saved our scrappy underdog once again and sent Miss Vivacious home.

Vicki was heartbroken by the time I found her backstage, so I quickly pulled her in for a hug and assured her that both she and her pastie cemented a place in drag race herstory. Like, yeah, sure, that was a little hyperbolic, but you know that Vicki types generally thrive in the All Stars situation, when they have time to watch their first season and realise they have everything it takes and to just not worry so much about how they come across. And that latter part of the conversation was enough to get her vibing enough to smash a big bowl of Festivicki Frivacious.

This is one of those hodge-podge – like Vinegar – recipes where you pretty much throw all your leftovers on some fries and thrive. And given the festive season is well and truly underway, turkey, stuffing and gravy feel correct.

So let go and enjoy!

Festivicki Frivacious
Serves: 2.

Ingredients
3 cups Jud Beerza Battered Fries
1 cup Nick Ciabatta Stuffing
1 cup Brined Littrell Turkey, shredded
¾ cup Howie Doriesling Gravy

Method
Cook everything as per their recipes, or assemble your leftovers on a bench.

To serve, divide the fries between two bowls, top with stuffing and turkey and then drizzle with gravy. And devour.

You could also add craisins, baked apples, or cheese curds if they tickle your fancy. The main thing that matters is that you put your Thanksgiving leftovers to good use and bask in the glory.


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Ri-the Menu Cheeseburger

Burgers, Main, RuPaul’s Drag Race Down Under, RuPaul’s Drag Race Down Under 3, Street Food, TV, TV Recap

Previously on Drag Race Down Under thanks to a perfectly timed fainting episode, Mother Ivory mothered and scored herself a check – I hope – for the third episode. After Rita returned to the Werk Room, inspired and ready for rudemption, she learnt that the dolls would being starring in an improv sketch for the Fake Housewives of Down Under. And was instantly filled with dread. Gabriella on the other hand was positively pumped, confident in finally getting her star turn and being able to snatch the win. Which she promptly did, though TBH, the competition was hardly there. Flor was barking mad, Bumpa was Bumpa – so beloved – while Ivanna just looked to be trapped in her head and Rita was an absolute mess. When it came to the lip sync, Rita once again got her energy back, slaying and saving herself, while poor Ivanna exited stage left.

In the exact same placement as her husband Anita.

Backstage Rita was gagged to have survived her second lip sync in a row, putting it down to her hunger for the competition. While Hollywould pointed out it may just be because she is a lip sync assassin. The dolls meanwhile toasted the heartbroken Ivanna, wishing the judges got to see how joyous and fun she was backstage, since they felt it was lacking in the challenges. Talk turned to Gabriella’s win before Ashley continued her Milk storyline, complaining about how she has now been safe twice and as such, she was hungry for a win. Though Flor assured her that she was too. While Italy’s own Ms. Labucci decided that since she has had a taste of victory, she is well and truly ready for another.

Asking the dolls to catch her as she skated on by.

The next day everyone was feeling positive and ready to face the next challenge. Particularly Flor, given she was happy to get rid of the teams given Bumpa did her head in. Hollywould meanwhile agreed that she was kinda shocked Bumpa was deemed high in the last challenge, before Rita reminded everyone that while she lip synced twice in one episode, she knows her worth and isn’t going to let it impact her. Hopefully not jinxing herself again in the process. Ru interrupted the kiki wheeling out 10 of the hottest Pit Crew members for the dolls to pick out who is wearing matching panties. As is often the case, we all won but Gabriella Labucci won that little bit more. But who cares, packages!

And for this week’s Maxi Challenge, the dolls would be playing the Snatch Game so really we have no time to dwell on logistics. Simply remember them fondly.

After Ru departed, the dolls split up to talk through their characters with Flor wisely locking in Charo while Bumpa excitedly shared she was doing a famed Opera Singer. Isis meanwhile locked in Gloria Swanson, Hollywould planned to do community service Naomi Campbell and Gabriella, like an icon, was doing Emma Wiggle. Ru dropped by to talk to her new daughters, with Gabriella admitting how nervous she was to live up to the expectations of the judges as a proven comedy queen. And the fact Ru had no idea about The Wiggles. Isis meanwhile had Ru nervous with her choice before Ashley delighted her with her choice of playing Jesus Christ himself. But make it gay. Rita meanwhile thought it was a good idea to play the pioneer of the suffragette movement – Rita gurl, you’re in danger. Thankfully though, after Ru bounced, Isis and Rita spiralled over their choices and both opted to change.

We dropped by the Snatch Game set where Gabriella stuck with Emma Wiggle, Isis pivoted to Donatella Versace, Bumpa stuck with Dame Kiri Te Kanawa, Rita went to Cardi B while Hollywould, Ashley and Flor wisely stuck with their OG choices. While I’d love to say it was finally a winning Down Under Snatch Game, it wasn’t, as Ashley and Isis far and away ran  circles around their sisters. Ashley in particular, talking about Jesus being bred and living out her gay dreams. While Rita was just a mess. But so messy, it was kinda charming?

Elimination Day arrived with Ashley feeling her oats, ready to potentially snatch a win and stamp her place in the contest. While Hollywould exuded confidence, she admitted she was joking and knew she was a mess. Though a gracious mess, as she praised Isis and Ashley for slaying. Ashley in turn felt Bumpa would be joining them in the top, while the rest of the dolls all kinda knew any of them could be going home. Except Flor, who was sure she would be the third top, while Gabriella was simply hoping she would be safe.

Ru, Michelle and Rhys were joined on the panel by Keiynan Lonsdale as the dolls stomped the Night of 1000 Kylie Minogue’s runway. Bumpa was up first, gorgeous in blue and green in Kylie’s showgirl era, Ashley served In My Arms music video, and was glorious, before Flor gave us the green fairy and was stun. Ning. Rita gave the weaker version of the In My Arms music video, though her mug was so, so, so perfect. Hollywould gave cyborg Kylie and was fierce as hell, Isis also gave a more glamorous green fairy before Gabriella gave Delinquents premiere Kylie, rather than Charlene like I desperately hoped from her.

Hollywould and Gabriella were sent to safety before Bumpa was praised for a strong start in Snatch Game, though read for fading throughout. Though her runway was beloved. Ashley meanwhile got wall to wall praise for Snatch Game and her runway. Praised in particular for bringing dignity to her Jesus without losing the jokes. Isis too was absolutely beloved, while Rita’s look received wall to wall praise, though her Snatch Game was truly hated. Flor meanwhile was read for not bringing any comedy to her character work, though they found her outfit cute.

Backstage the dolls caught the safe girls up, with Rita shocked they were safe given she would have put them both in the bottom. Everyone agreed the win was down to Ashley and Isis, before Rita and Flor admitted they were confident they would be lip syncing. And they bloody hated it, given it is Rita’s third in a row. With sweet Gabriella encouraging them to learn the lip sync and use it as the fire to push them further in the competition. Bless.

Ultimately Ashley took out victory as Isis was sent to safety alongside her, before Bumpa was gagged to join them, leaving Rita to serve her third lip sync of the season against Flor. And as soon as the singing budgie’s Secrets kicked off it was clear both girls had the fire Gabriella requested, though Flor’s experience proved to give her a little edge. Hitting every lyric and slaying the game. Which was enough to save her and send sweet Rita Menu out of the race. 

While she wished she read a fucking book – included only because it was a glorious exit line – I assured her that if we learnt anything from the Book Ball in Season 8, it is that illiteracy is hilarious. I pulled her in for a hug and told her she should be so proud of how well she did in the competition, and honestly, could have gone a lot further if not for a bad run of challenges for a non-comedy queen. Which proved to delight her enough to wipe away her tears and sit down to enjoy a piping hot Ri-the Menu Cheeseburger.

Despite the gastronomic delights of The Menu, the dish that has everyone salivating is its gloriously simple burger. And after sampling a version compositing all the copycats I could find on the internet, I know why. Crunchy and umami, sweet and gooey, this perfect burger has everything and will keep you coming back again and again.

Enjoy!

Ri-the Menu Cheeseburger
Serves: 2.

Ingredients
500g 80/20 beef mince
1 tsp kosher salt
½ tsp black pepper, ground
½ small onion, thinly sliced
4 slices American cheese
2 Briocher Bünsberg, toasted
your favourite burger sauce – I can’t go past the one from Smoke Shacqui Patterson – and dill pickle chips, to serve

Method
Divide the beef evenly into 4 portions and gently roll into meatballs, working as little as possible so you can still see the strings of the mincing. Pop on a plate and place in the freezer for no more than 15 minutes.

Heat a large skillet over medium-high heat and get the air vent going or open up your windows, as there will be smoke. You will know the pan is hot enough if you splash water in the pan and it balls up and rolls along the surface. Place the balls in the hot skillet, top with a square of parchment and using a large metal spatula, flatten each into a patty. Sprinkle each with a little salt and pepper, followed by some sliced onion.

Once the base of the patties have crisped – about 90 seconds or so should do – flip over, season the tops and top with a slice of cheese, and cook until the bottoms are gloriously crisp.

To assemble, smear some sauce on the base of the buns, top with some pickle chips, followed by the two patties and close. Then devour, gloriously.


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Ginger Beerch

Drag Race France, Drag Race France 2, Drink, TV, TV Recap

Previously on Drag Race France the dolls played le Snatch Game, which I believe is a perfect translation, despite my middling grasp of the French language. As is oft the case with the foreign seasons, I may not have been completely across the celebs they were playing, but I could tell when people were landing and tragicaly, when they weren’t (mainly due to rattlesnake cues). Moon, Keiona and Punani were the former and absolutely slayed – the latter in front of the person she was playing – while Ginger, Sara and Piche bombed. And tragically, despite winning a challenge, Piche was somehow eliminated over Ginger. I assume because she couldn’t do shit in the lip sync wearing that (killer) runway.

Backstage the dolls were feeling just as heartbroken as I was to see Piche exit so soon, with Punani toasting her for being a sickening performer, despite her shyness. Ginger meanwhile was proud of how hard she fought in the lip sync, despite the gown, though was grateful to have another chance to shine this week. Which did not bother Keiona one bit, who was ready to escalate from high to a win, finally. Everyone came together to praise Punani for an absolute breakout week and seeing her grow in confidence, despite being quieter than some of her sisters, was a delight. But when they started to shade Keiona for being high yet again, you know it was the final bit of petrol on the fire and she is ready to demolish each and every one of them. Like a damn icon.

This week the dolls played hide and seek as they returned to the Werk Room with Sara hilariously winning that too. Because she is what? A winner. The clock struck cocorico, signalling the arrival of sweet Nicky, to send them to Fort Boyard for a little mini challenge. And after a cheeky little wikipedia, I am excited. The dolls joined the zaddy Pit Crew to find keys to unlock their cock cages by dipping their hands into random crap. Cookie dipped her hand in shit – or nutella, I hope – Punani got hair, Sara squealed through thick slime, Moon got toy snakes, Ginger got the wet sponge in honour of Monet, Keiona bossed some spiky toys and Mami fingered pasta. One by one the dolls tried their keys, with Keiona coming out victorious. Winning a puffer vest which is clearly bad in France, so let the private school kids and Queen St cowboys know asap.

With that out of the way, Nicky announced that for this week’s maxi challenge the dolls would star in the rusical, Le Bossu de Notre Drag. And for winning the mini challenge, Keiona had the power to assign the roles, making her even more popular with her sisters. They sat down to listen to the musical, with all the dolls excitedly vibing with the script before coming back together for Keiona to wield her powers by letting everyone list their top three preferences and filling the roles that way. She ultimately kept the lead role of Quasimolo for herself, giving the narrator to Cookie, Boulangère to Mami and Moon got Malo. Ginger meanwhile got pressed about Sara and Punani working together – and taking a role she wanted – while Cookie sided with the quiet duo, leaving Ginger with the role that nobody wanted.

Jour d’elimination quickly arrived with everyone stressed about performing live on the mainstage, though thankfully, they felt more united amongst the chaos. As they beat their mugs, Keiona opened up about cutting her father off for being judgemental though hilariously just hoped to make him regret it now that she is a star. Punani meanwhile spoke about how her parents came around to drag when realising it is more than just dressing up. This turned conversation to the perception that it is a hypersexualised profession and how it is great that Drag Race has changed how it is viewed. Well, except in America but don’t get me started on that. Moon meanwhile spoke about how she fought to play a man in the rusical to fight against the fact she had to break out of the male coded body to finally live her truth and ugh, I love her too.

Nicky, Daphne and Kiddy were joined by Barbara Butch and Juliette Armanet on the panel as the dolls put on the opening and closing night of Le Bossu de Notre Drag. And like Spain before them, it was loooooonnnnngg. Though also very good. Not Season 6 Adore vs. Courtney good, but it was good. Particularly Keiona, Cookie and Moon who were pitch perfect in each and every moment. Nicky meanwhile was crying from the panel, grateful to all of them for working so hard and delighting each and every one of them. Daphne was crying, Juliette was crying and ugh, it was beautiful to see the full cast get their roses.

On the Excess Couture runway Cookie was stunning in a little black dress with a big, pink train and ugh, did I mention it was stunning? Even if the pink looked like a scrunchie. Sara was stunning as she served seamstress chic, Keiona slayed in a stunning, voluminous, deep teal floral gown – just give her a win finally, damn it – Punani served wire hanger and a cute green gown, Ginger was wrapped in a giant belt in honour of Gaultier, Moon slayed in a camp cowgirl showerpuff number, and Mami slayed in a pastel pink, puffy bowed jumpsuit.

The judges praised everyone for slaying the runway ahead of lavishing Cookie for being absolutely stunning on the runway and a star in the rusical. Sara was praised for working so well with Punani and for giving such a creative, camp runway. Keiona was beloved for everything she did this week, from the ballroom inspired runway to getting gritty and warm in the rusical, making all of the judges truly feel something. Punani was praised for a strong performance in the rusical and for looking good on the runway, though they admitted they felt she was outshone by Sara. Ginger’s runway was beloved and while they felt she did well in the rusical, they needed her to change her makeup to avoid looking like a villain. Moon got us back to more wall to wall, overt praise; beloved for taking a risk and pulling it off. While they lived for Mami’s runway and for her being so much fun in the rusical.

Backstage the dolls were thrilled about how well received they all were this week, though unsure what it meant for the lip sync, since they were so good. As they spoke about how well cast the rusical was, Ginger spoke out and said she wasn’t happy to have been left with the dud role and as such was worried it would land her in the bottom. This fired up Cookie – who got the role she wanted – with her frankly calling her bitter as they bickered back and forth. Thankfully Keiona reminded her she was still great in the role, but was immediately shut down by the feuders to let them continue.

Ultimately Keiona rightly took out her first win of the season to the delighted applause of her sisters. Cookie, Moon, Mami and Sara were then sent to safety, leaving Punani and Ginger to lip sync for the lives. Because despite the judges agreeing the dolls were all perfect in the challenge, someone must go. Punani then said it was her second lip sync for her life, curiously, as Le dernier jour du disco by Juliette and while Punani wasn’t confident as a lip syncer, she felt each and every moment and absolutely slayed, giving all the drama. Ginger meanwhile was camp and fun, though tragically similar to last week’s performance, which was enough to save our dear Punani and send Ginger to the house. Bitch.

As she returned to the Werk Room, I pulled her in for a massive hug and praised her for being such a delightful, uplifting icon. While she may not have made it as far as she would have liked, she made an impression on our hearts and I reminded her that TBH, that is all that really matters. Which was a super half-arsed peptalk, but it was also highly effective and as such, we simply toasted her run with a cool glass of Ginger Beerch.

I know, I know – why make a ginger beer when you could just by one. But honestly, you haven’t lived until you’ve had it fresh; warming and zingy, it is the perfect beverage for curing what ails ya’.

Enjoy!

Ginger Beerch
Serves: 4.

Ingredients
2 cups raw caster sugar
300g fresh ginger, peeled and thinly sliced
1 cup lemon juice
1L soda water
ice, to serve

Method
Pop the sugar and ginger in  saucepan with a litre of water and cook, stirring over low heat, until the sugar has dissolved. Bring to a simmer and cook for about 20 minutes, or until a gloriously pungent syrup has formed. Strain and leave to cool.

Once the ginger is chill, pour into a jug with the lemon juice and give a good stir. Then stir in the soda water and serve over ice. With or without a sprig of mint, for extra freshness. Then down.


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Cherry Jams Mansfield

Condiment, TV, TV Recap, Vegetarian

Previously on All Stars fresh off her second win, Jimbo well and truly made it clear that she is the frontrunner. After the dolls kikied about the delightful Darienne’s (robbery) departure, post-bus throwing from Alexis. Sadly we didn’t get time to recover, however as the dolls were immediately thrown into the Snatch Game of Love with Matt Rogers and Brisbane’s Bowen Yang. The first group was a bit of a mess, with Kahanna bombing, Heidi reading her and Jaymes just riding above it as a sublime Jenny Coolidge. While the other panel was far better, it was still far and away Jimbo’s show with her iconic turn as Shirley Temple. As elimination day arrived, Kahanna confronted the soft and supple queen about making the experience harder for her. And while Jaymes rightly argued that is how Snatch Game is meant to be played, after Kandy joined the fray to ask why Heidi told Jimbo she was planning to eliminate her, things got very very heated. Leading to Heidi choosing to follow in Adore and DeLa’s footsteps and eliminate herself.

Alexis obviously started sobbing while everyone tried to pull things together for the runway, while Jimbo admitted to us that after hearing everything, the only person she feels she can trust anymore is herself.

Ru, Michelle and the hilarious Ross Mathews were joined by Las Cultalistas themselves Matt and Bowen from Brisbane, no doubt named after Bowen Hills which can be seen from the Birth Suites of RBWH where Bowen was born. But I digress with too much creepy information about Bowen’s nationality. Ru confirmed that Heidi had quit the competition, officially, before Jessica kicked off the Ruveal Yourself runway serving chicken to egg realness and ugh, I love it. Kahanna went from showgirl to nude, Jaymes went from a camp puppet to herself before rocking a little swimsuit and then underwear. And titties. Kandy went from housewife to vamp to sci-fi icon, Lala was stunning in a cloak to a regal bodysuit, Jimbo went from Adam to Eve and ugh, it was so good. I mean, she even popped her snake! Oh and then Alexis went witch penguin lady to sexy villainess.

Kandy and Lala were sent to safety before Jessica was praised for giving the perfect look but not enough personality. Oh and they loved the runway. Poor Kahanna was read for not bringing enough Coco to the Snatch Game and forgetting to throw out any jokes. Thankfully, her runway was stunning and they lived. Jaymes received universal praise for her Jennifer Coolidge, though was read for the runway not fitting right. Alexis too received all the love for her Bea Arthur, being on from start to finish and landing every joke. And for telling the iconic camp story of the witch from Into the Woods on the runway. And then Jimbo, obviously, was beloved for being so fucking demented and providing all the layers. In Snatch Game and the runway, so obviously she took out her third win in five weeks while Jessica and Kahanna found themselves in the bottom.

Backstage Kandy and Lala were thrilled to have survived Snatch Game, given how nervous they both were about the challenge. After sitting down, they discovered that Heidi had left a mirror message with Kandy in particular gagged by her shade. They then crunched the numbers realising they’d be going from 8 to 6 within the day – Kandy is the accountant, after all – before the tops and bottoms joined them. Kandy directed their attention to Heidi’s farewell message before Alexis reminded them that this isn’t her first struggle in the contest, and as such she is hardly shocked. Jimbo meanwhile said that she knows she is a threat – I mean, three wins in five weeks – so knows people would want her gone but she’d just rather everyone addressed it on camera, given it is what they signed on for.

Talk turned to the bottoms with everyone agreeing Jessica wouldn’t have been in the bottom if Heidi hadn’t quit. Even Kahanna, while I apparently am the only one that would beg to differ. But alas, they still had to kiki with Jimbo pulling Jessica aside and her reiterating that she doesn’t feel like she was that bad this week and as such, does not deserve to go home. Though Jimbo also knew that she was the bigger threat moving forward. Kahanna meanwhile told the dolls that she was so in her head in the challenge that she couldn’t have fun, but reminded them that she is a fighter. The dolls traded places with Jessica just calmly telling them she knows she deserves to stay, while Kahanna simply told Jimbo it felt right that she was in the bottom as she did the worst, right is right.

Oh and then Matt and Bowen – who was born in Brisbane, if you hadn’t heard – dropped by for a kiki and I love them like I love the dolls.

With that the dolls voted and Jimbo took her place on the mainstage as the iconic Jasmine Kennedie was revealed as this week’s victor. As Dula Peep’s Hallucinate kicked off Jasmine Jasmined though once again, Jimbo served a strong show, giving a wig reveal so seamless I gasped. But Jasmine was spinning and flipping into a split as she served sex and all the damn moves. So yeah, while Jimbo was strong, she kept her streak going 0 from 6 in lip syncs. With that she took her place at the back of the stage before Ru decided against eliminating anyone else tonight after Heidi’s quit and ugh, I love it. As does Kahanna, who backstage was gagged to learn that literally every queen had voted for her to go. Well, gagged but also fully ok with it, given she had been in the bottom before.

Jimbo meanwhile was thrilled to have dominated at Snatch Game and to take out her third win, though was starting to feel super embarrassed about the fact she just chokes in every lip sync. She started to break down, feeling like while she is a sickening performer, she isn’t cutting through when it counts. Though she also admitted that Heidi’s departure also got in her head. Kandy meanwhile was worried about people coming for her based on what Heidi said and while Alexis agreed it was dramatic, it is clear that Kandy saying what Heidi said she did wasn’t really a gag – I mean, no one is beating Jimbo, that is as clear as Jinkx and Sasha’s multiple crowns – but the fact she just wouldn’t cop to it which is odd. Making me feel like she isn’t lying.

The next day the dolls were shocked to see that all the Ru portraits had been removed from the wall and replaced with Mommy Dearest herself, Joan Crawford. And Faye Dunaway as Joan Crawford, obvi. Which made sense after Ru dropped by to announce that for this week’s Maxi Challenge the dolls would be starring in Joan: The Unauthorised Rusical. Which honestly, werk. Each doll would be playing a different Joan from throughout her life with the dolls immediately sitting down to listen to the show to pick out their versions. Jaymes took Mommy Dearest, Lala got Mildred Pierce, Jimbo – duh – went Baby Jane, Kahanna snatched MGM queen, Alexis went don’t fuck with me fellas while Kandy refused to take anything but no wire hangers Joan, knowing she needs to slay, given she was almost eliminated in the rusical in Season 13. 

Sadly for her, Jessica also wanted the role and as such, the duo had to audition. Jessica couldn’t stay on beat however, as Kandy hit all the notes and well, she easily snatched it. Though she knew that also meant she desperately needed to prove herself.

The dolls caught up with Leland on the mainstage to record their vocals with Kahanna struggling to find a key – where is Mama when we need her – Jaymes was perfection from start to finish, Lala was an iconic raptress before going operatic, Kandy needed to add the character, Jimbo gave rocker and well, Jessica was a delight, which should be obvious, no? While Alexis appeared to struggle, I have a sneaking suspicion it is a fakeout. Leland traded out with Adam Shankman so the dolls could learn the choreography with Kahanna struggling with technique, despite having fun. Lala was all charm, Jaymes meanwhile couldn’t get the choreo but who cares when she is that much fun, Jessica gave all the drama and Alexis was polished as hell. Poor Jimbo, however, was stuck in her head while Kandy was in hers too and struggled.

Elimination Day arrived with everyone thrilled to turn the show, Alexis in particular as the token theatre kid. Kandy was ready to just cream her face as everyone got into their iconic Joan looks. Jimbo was nervous given she went home on her last ruscial, while Jaymes was confident given she was able to inject herself and comedy into the role. Alexis obviously was ready to serve character before Lala turned the attention to the upcoming Grace Jones runway, excited to be serving in honour of her inspiration. Oh and then the dolls realised that after tonight, there will only be six dolls remaining, leading to talk about how they will vote moving forward with everyone admitting track records are now less of a focus and how they go in the individual challenge will start to count more and more.

Ru, Michelle and TS were joined on the panel by Adam Shankman for the opening and closing of Joan: The Unauthorised Rusical. And ugh, it was perfect from start to finish. Kahanna was a stunning vixen, Jaymes was a menacing, camp delight, Kandy was a feisty pop diva, Jessica served full rocker drama, Lala was iconic from the voguing to the slapping on beat, Alexis had all the star quality as she dosey doed through the Pepsi years before Jimbo closed the show as a moody Baby Jane. And yeah, this is far and away the best rusical we’ve had in a while. On the Night of 1000 Grace Joneses runway, Kahanna gave a stunning showgirl version of her rosebud-rocker look, Jaymes slayed as the Little Edie version of her fox fur look, Kandy Muse gave Grace does dragometry, Jessica served purple princess in her hooded gown, Lala was stunning in the moon mask look, Alexis was gorgeous as the black hatted Grace while Jimbo was stunning in the smaller iconic black-hatted look.

Alexis and Jimbo were sent to safety – somehow for the former – before the judges praised everyone for nailing the rusical. Kahanna was read for lacking presence while hitting all the choreography, while they lived for her look. Jaymes’ performance was beloved despite missing some of the choreo, while the look was read for being ill-fitted. Kandy received wall-to-wall praise for the rusical and the runway, while Jessica was equally beloved for slaying the rusical though her look was only just loved, not beloved. And then Lala also received all the love, for nailing the rusical and slapping her way into our hearts, though her look was read as safe. Ultimately it was Kandy that took out victory while Kahanna and Jaymes, sadly, were up for elimination.

Backstage Jimbo was on cloud nine to be safe given she went home during the UK vs The World rusical. Alexis meanwhile was rightly feeling a little disappointed given she did that in both the challenge and the runway, before she praised Grace for being an icon. Talk turned to who would be in the top with them agreeing Lala, Kandy and Jessica were clearly the top, meaning Jaymes and Kahanna must be forming the bottom. Despite doing well at one thing each. The tops and bottoms joined them to confirm they were right about placements, with Kandy being the one to take out the ultimate win. Kahanna was in her feels to have bottomed once again, crying as she told the girls she simply felt defeated.

Kandy pulled her in for a hug before pulling her aside to talk about how tough it is to win when one of her besties is in the bottom. Kahanna opened up about feeling like this is a challenge she thought she was good at and as such, it is super disappointing to be in the bottom. Jaymes meanwhile was telling the other dolls that she felt she does well in the challenge each and every week and as such, doesn’t feel it is time for her to go. Trading places, Jaymes told Kandy that while Kahanna has had a win she has also bottomed more and then heaped Kandy with praise as she asked her to ignore her friendship and instead vote on who has been doing the best all around. After Jimbo nearly fell while reclining on the edge of the couch, Adam dropped by to praise the queens and while Alexis didn’t get the flowers she deserved, she was thrilled to geek out with a hero and I’m so happy for her.

With that the dolls voted before Kandy took her spot on the mainstage before Angeria was revealed as her lip sync assassin. As soon as Grace’s I’m Not Perfect but I’m Perfect for You kicked off, both dolls gave us the drama however it was clearly Kandy’s show as she served all the sex. Which was enough for her to take out the win, the $30K cash tip and the chance to eliminate, tragically, the iconic Jaymes Mansfield.

In my opinion, for being the bigger threat, which is what I told her as she found me backstage. Which wasn’t hard as I was scream-sobbing in an aggressively shrill manner. Once found, she pulled me off the floor and pulled me into her ample bosom – only just more ample than her meaty tuck – and told me how grateful she is for my support. You see, when she went home first on a damn cheerleading challenge, I was equally irate and promised her that should she return, All Stars seasons play to her strengths and as such, I knew she would slay. And she kept that in her head throughout the competition as she, like Angela Bassett before her, did the thing. Which was more than worthy of being celebrated with a jam, this time Cherry Jams Mansfield.

There is something so rich and moody about cherry jam. The tart nature of cherries is perfect in the sickly sweet embrace of a jam, balancing with ease and leaving you with a preserve that has you wanting more and more.

Enjoy!

Cherry Jams Mansfield
Serves: 8.

Ingredients
2kg cherries, pitted
1kg raw caster sugar
1 lemon, zested and juiced

Method
Combine the cherries and sugar in a large saucepan, stir to combine, cover and leave to rest for three hours.

Once they are well and truly infused, add the zest and juice and pop the saucepan over medium heat. Cook, stirring occasionally, for an hour and a half, or until thickening and glossy.

While still hot, ladle into sterilised jars and leave to cool before sealing. Or you know, spreading straight on a scone or some toast and devouring.


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